No Latency: Side Quest "Duck Un-Cover" Pt.2 - podcast episode cover

No Latency: Side Quest "Duck Un-Cover" Pt.2

Dec 29, 20211 hr 13 min
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Episode description

A Merry Season, to all from No Latency! Now that the team have got the information they need from the collector, it's time to go find  Warehouse 25 and get Retro's duck back, what will they find at the warehouse, and what are they going to do if it's not there? Guest Stars @MissMagitek and @jonjonthewise join the Side Quest this season on No Latency. Will Retro get his duck back? How long have you spend in a porta potty? Will terminus make it out unscathed? (unlikely) Only the dice will tell. A Cyberpunk adventure continues... If you'd like to support us, We now have a Patreon! Patreon.com/nolatency More information and MERCH is on our website! nolatencypodcast.com Twitter: @nolatencypod Instagram: nolatency_podcast Find @skullorjade, @chronicjoy and @binary_drgaon on twitch, for live D&D and more. Thank you again for all your support everyone, it's been amazing building and working on this story and it truly humbling to have you all supporting.

Transcript

Last time I know latency sidequest fucker. Took my duck. Want to make a name for myself in this city. I need to get my duck back. How do I get? My? But I am actually quite intrigued by this job, especially because it's a live animal. I don't think I've actually seen a live animal since I was a child. Then adopt yesterday, the prize of the first night of the auction, I bought, and I paid money for the job. You can't tell us what But you can say, forget didn't sell it to?

Let's say I left the computer unlocked in my office. I'll do a quick search. On the computer, will get all the information. We need, will get the hell out of you. Your item will be smart Warehouse, 25 until delivery location is supplied, so Warehouse, 25 is where it's stored. This is this where we have the conversation. So, all right. Look, I'm already up to.

I'm sorry. He's gone on a little bit longer than we thought and have to now also work for the collector, but I really appreciate it, both like on board to help me get back my mallard. To me, you're both cool in my book. Hey man, you're cool. As soon as I saw that TV on your shoulders, you know what? I wish I had my best friend of me here Sano to hear that because he hates me, just for having a TV for a head-on. Oh sucks. All right. How many times you seen the guy with the TV for a head?

That has a pet duck? That were rescuing from a warehouse. I mean, we didn't die for this duck. I hope you don't tell me. I have to live with him. Yeah. Yeah, it sucks when you have a friend who's boring and lame, Yeah, all he wants to do is just murderer, Sokka, people that sounds Lina's swords and just act all cool and Moody and dark Corners, we should be friends because that sounds right up my alley. Well, it's it is. All right. This is all part of the job.

We will take care of it. We will get your duck, and we will do this job for the collector. Yeah, look. Hey, we got a job with you, and now we got another job with the collector. So, as far as I know, it's been up and up, you know what? Here I got a, I got another thing, a kitten catch here, not for now, but for later, it's going to say, save it for after, you know, I think I'm gonna hold Laughs. After seeing you with the TV, I'm telling you the TV had thing. Really fucked me up.

I'm just saying you can just just hold onto it for later for yourself. Yeah. Okay. I'll definitely hold on to it this collector. They seem like they might be a good contact to have for future things. Do you have you worked with this collector before? They seemed like they knew your name? Yeah, dude. What the fuck? Man, I, yes. What was that by legally

binding? Constructive for something that I've signed for somebody else that cannot describe exactly what I said or done near the collectors mentioned for, what times? I have been. Okay, that was fucking weird. Okay. Well, sorry, what did I just say? I didn't realize it, you said something. Oh shit. Okay, inside retro, you faced out for a second and you notice the warehouse start to come into your vision and you've got a break roll, the driver couldn't

hit the brakes, hit the brakes. You roll it onto the sidewalk and you pop the back right tire. Oh God. All right, so you're gonna have to change the tire before you leave. Oh, I might as well change it now, I'll change the tire. It's my fault. If y'all want to try to scope it out. all right, I will I will check it out. Yeah, the front of the building

has two doors. Okay. When you arrive at the warehouse, there are there are two doors at the front of the building, you've got a small door for like people and then like a garage door that Vehicles will go into. And that's what you see on the front of a building big sign that says Warehouse 25 and the logo for you P and S and are there like, guards, cameras turrets. There's a low grade camera outside and there aren't any workers outside.

Currently, although you haven't checked around the back of the building. So I'll go ahead and I'll just kind of do a little circle around the building. Not being terribly, you know, out in the open but trying to be a little conspicuous. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna let pris do our thing because that's not my thing around. The back of the building Romeo perception. Check 18, oh yeah, around the back of the building near the back door is a porta potty. It seems there is Someone inside

having a bad day. Well, Damn. Is going to try not to laugh. She is that it's quiet as possible. And all right, well, we got at least one person here. Not a good day. You really suck. It's just gross. I'm not going to put audit audience. I'm not putting audio in for this. Just imagine it for yourself. I'll give you one. There you go. That's we go. That's it. That's give the people what they

want. Well, since they're completely occupied in this, I was kind of just walk past and do you know, survey the rest of, you know, the other side of the building as well. Yeah, you find someplace like some trash cans and stuff but you found the exit on the back of the building. So there is an entrance fire exit on the back. Okay, well I returned back to the others. There's at least one person

here. I don't know if it's their security guard for the evening, but he is not having a good day in the porta potty of resting Grinch face. No, no, he has something terribly different. I cannot think of a witty pun for what is happening in the porta potty in the back right now, but it's bad as dropping a yule log. Okay, inspiration inspiration. A that is worthy of its, that is worthy. Absolutely. How's the tire looking? It's fixed. I got it done. Oh yeah. You rolled a 19.

That's fine. Okay, we got a new Target. How many times I've had to fix tires on this damn van. She's a Beauty. She's my Vana. So so you said there's some kind of person in the back door occupied. I don't know for how much longer so we may want to move quickly. Okay, well, we're going to definitely want to slow them down. Maybe we could lock the door from the outside and make sure they don't get out. Yeah, can I go ahead and take a

piece of like debris or trash? That's outside and jam it inside the little. What is it that whether they put a padlock on the outside for ya and then I'll do that. Tie it off. So then that way they can't get out. That's going to cost you 15 scrap, okay? Just deduct it from the immense amount of scrap you already have. Yes. Okay. Because I know you have large play, need to start getting you to end it. So that's so then we're in the

back right here. You feel him in the porta, potty, put his hand against the the door, but he's locked it from the inside. So he still doesn't know that it's locked. So Terminus will point at the back door with with his thumb and say, like come on, let's go. You know, try not to make any noise. Yeah, let's let's Kris Kringle this inside doing. Is there any special lock to get in this back door? Roller perception? Check. Okay, let's do that. You rolled your old one.

I rolled a one and as you're standing next to the door is are expecting it. What you notice is that there's a piece of wood, keeping it open, but you press the door, it closes and locks son of them. So the guy in the porta potty, obviously, left something in there to keep it open, so he could get back in you've now ruined that opportunity. Shit. Oh man. Okay wait I got something and I have a lock-picking kit. I can try to pick this lock. Mmm.

If it's a traditional analog lock, if it's not I have electronic security Tech as well. It's a it's a it's a traditional lock. This place isn't high security, it has shitty Tech. For 750. Eddie's a day. Yeah, yeah, exactly. They just bleed you. All right, so I'll use my lock picking kit and I'll put my three remaining. Look, I'm about to jam it in. Well, what are you doing? I'm obviously pick. You don't put an XR7 in with a pin bolt be Eat a 1070.

Sick with a 1278, 10 volt, Terminus just looks at the, the Lockpick Set, and he looks at retro and he goes you, you do it, okay? Look, this is how you do it properly, okay? Gotta use the trim bolt slide in gently. All right. And then as you slide in, you fix around with the 2784, can you get to the right and the buell's and then you pop it in? Like so kind of like you shake it, like a Polaroid picture kind of deal. Anyway, we're whispering. Right? That's why he cannot hear you.

He is too busy shitting himself. Making his all sounds including those right now, but he's having a bad day. Yeah, it's chimneys on fire. Okay, exactly. If I could give inspiration twice, I would do it. Do the thing, do the clock, roll picklock. I didn't know. In all right, if you want to use that, now that's fine. Well again you must I must, I must, I must to another one. A re-roll always brings another one. I knew it.

I knew it. As you're as you're trying to as your mansplaining, this to terminus, you look at him, not paying attention and snap both of his picked his lock picks and you have broken his locket bad. In the lock. And now the door probably isn't going to open. You can have to come in a different way. Oh God. Okay. All that explaining for this, we're never gonna get this duck. We can't lose Faith. All right, we lost faith in our tools. It turned out to be crappy.

We're going to do it. We can fix it up this way. We'll just go in the front, kick in the door and bring Christmas. To these Godless Heathen motherfuckers. Why don't we just kick? Damn, that guy's so loud. I almost want to tip over that fucking porta potty. You know what? That might not be a bad idea terminus. Look, listen, just hear me out. It'll cause a chaos. A panic.

You'll call somebody. If there's anybody else in the building, they'll come out to try to help them and then, that's our ticket in or he'll if he's alone, he'll call somebody from another building or somewhere else. And we'll have people come, who are? We weren't even supposed to be here in the first place. All right, fair enough. That is also a possibility. Okay, suggestion, we check the other door if we Get in fine. And then we can tip the porta potty over on the way out.

Okay. I just want to make sure we at least have that in our Zeitgeist. You know that we might do it fine. Fine. But three can ruin the plan but honestly I have to look to press because they're they've got the thing on their shoulders. Yeah, yeah. Press you got the Lead Foot. I think you should do the kicking of the doors fine. If it will bring Some joy to both of your faces. I will do that. Can you do a one liner? When you do it too, which door are you kicking it? Yeah, front or back.

Well we're here at the back and I don't think that this person in the porta-potties going to hear us. So let's do. Let's do the back and feel free again to do a one liner. Well, Die Hard, is a Christmas movie, right? So, you know, UPI, okay, all right, Romy, broiling, everything, only sure. It could be brawling Athletics, whatever you want. Well, no, it is. It's very much like done about strength. Alright. Brawling. That's fair. Okay. Okay. The same skill level for me involved.

Anyway teen? Yeah, good enough at the door, the lock as you kick it snaps, the ball swings open. And inside the room, there are just Stacks and stacks of crates all over the place above on the ceiling. There's this rack that can grab them. There's a nun activated turret in the center of the room and you hear voices. Roll me stealth.

Just press for now. Hmm. Still Still Still Still 1111 you some luck oof, I did, you know, yell if you tell ya ya know he's he's so there's a there's a relatively large dude Standing On Top of the observation walk away wearing a Santa Tahat. I'm sorry. We are filming. We're doing a movie reenactment. And we thought that this would be the right place to do it. This isn't a sin, a filming location.

Well, it was just so much that it's a warehouse, like ship stuff Rollergirl persuasion, because, that's wonderful. Bullshit DieHard know, we're filming, Now 13. All right. 13, it would be the NPC's human perception against Italy or Jack rolled a 13 as well. And he's like, all right. So sorry, you broke the fucking door, we can fix it. It's fine. We'll work to fix it. You better fucking fix it.

If you fix it, then we're fine. All right, I just like, take a couple steps back and I look at the other two. Okay. All right. I'll fix it. Fix it. Fix the doors, the door on this random Warehouse. Let me just take we're doing today. I'm going to use my basic, take some Putty and re-drill the new hole so that way you can happen while that's going on. In the process of doing this, you work out how to make a key with the scrap that you have on you that unlocks every door in

this building. Including any safe because you all the crib and he just for warehouse 25, you have a warehouse 25 skeleton key. Now, can I do a scan to see if I can find a while? He's doing that? I take out my cyber deck. Sounds good and, and I run a scam trying to visit one. Which one is it? There's no button here for interface, so I'm just going to roll. Yeah, - Robyn for us for. So, I I want to see if I can find an access point and 11

actually yes. Again in terms of network security, this is low but in terms of Manpower, these guys are pretty tough. So it's more, it's more protected by force rather than intelligence intelligence is there dump stat for the UPS company if you know what I mean, unfortunately. So yeah. You find that there is a node but you're not close enough. It's in the office. Okay, it's in the office. The office is the farthest building. There is the farthest room from you.

It's up some stairs along the observation walkway, in, in through a door. Can you can, you can feel the computer in there. Okay, so I'll just like let them know like hey if we want to cause a distraction with that turret, I need to get near that office then I can maybe get that turret to go Haywire cause some chaos. We pick up the duck, we get the hell out of here. Can I see if there is? Can I just see the inside of the warehouse? See if there's any people around

or anything like that? Yeah, real perception 14. Yes. You see Milling around through some of the boxes. Yet another person. This guy is way bigger. Large gentleman. The same kind of uniform as everyone else and also wearing a Santa hat. He uses the bubble to like wipe some sweat, off his face and flicks it back. So what he's wearing, they're all wearing Santa hats. Excuse me, excuse me, I need you. You who else is working here? Today, you are all in violation

of UPS worker. Worker, OSHA safety violations right now. I need you to come down here right now and come in and talk to me right now, as an OSHA safety representative, here you are all out of order. You're all out of safety equipment guidelines, and you all need to be reprimanded. So I need everybody here right now to tell me your names and who you are and who's in charge, come here coming right up. No, and the guy from the

balcony, comes downstairs. And another one of them comes around the corner from some boxes and there's now three of them in this room looking The the boss lady boss lady told us where the house he pulls off his hat and underneath is a yellow hard hat. They made us wear these polka dots and we named agent Holly wait hold on. Wait a minute they made you wear these hats. No boss lady but the but what was your name?

Jockey? The jack is this creating enough extraction for them for other people to speak by? I'm going to run a stuff to try to get up the stairs. And get to the office. All right, bro. Okay, here we go, this is mine 13. All right. The team. So Jack rolls at 12 and I was going to give him a minus one further distraction anyway, okay, so you managed to sneak past and get up into the the observation walkway? Okay, perfect. I'm in a text press saying,

locate the duck. So when that turret goes, we get the duck and we get the hell out of here. Supposed to locate this duck as this is all happening. I kind of just quietly behind just look around the warehouse, see if there any locations that maybe our cages or like things that aren't just in boxes. Because I assume, if this is a live duck, it will not be a great role perception.

I would like to be able to give Advantage by continuing the distraction by contemplating and saying, Then our CWC 784 that you cannot have any other car brings on top of your hard hat by OSHA standards because it knocks it melon void. Making sure that them having to wear those Santa hats over top of it is by federal law illegal. They cannot be doing that and

not only them. But Miss Jackie are all comparable for creating a completely hazardous area for people to work in. And with your 16 press, what you notice is, no sound coming from any of the boxes in here. Nothing there is no squeaking of animals. There is no quacking of ducks. There is no ook of monkeys. Everything in here is either dead or doesn't speak. I text back Terminus there is no duck here. God damn it all this for nothing. I'm definitely pushing that guy in the pooper.

All right. Well, am I close enough or do I need to be in the office? You can try and do it from here, but it's going to be at a minus 1. Okay. Well I don't want any - I want to be able to get in there. We have to get in the office then. All right? My Lockpick Set is broken. So what is they like a pin pad or just a regular lock? It's not locked. I was now locked. Okay, I open the door and I walk in. When you walk into the room, you walk into the office and there in the corner.

At a computer is a fem looking human. With a little track suit on that has the logo for you P and S on it. And they're also wearing a Santa hat and tapping away. And they look up from their desk. They look at your go Visitors. Oh, Hello darling. I'm the new trainee. Where's your hat? You know, I didn't get the memo about the. I thought it was actually a joke. It's not a joke, right? As and and in the memo it said you had to bring 100 Eddie's.

So, for the Hat, they put their hand out, I understand. But listen, listen, before we do all this, there's somebody I understand. But listen, there's somebody downstairs. I don't know what OSHA means, but they were talking about some kind of Osha violations with that. They're going on and on ice. I snuck out of there because, you know, I have to learn how to work today. I work on computers. I mean that's what the situation. All right 60, 16 s, good enough. Oh fine.

And they open up a drawer with a little box that says bribes in it. I'll be back in a minute. Okay, perfect. Just the chance I need to get in there. I put on my virtuality goggles and I connect straight into the access point. Excellent. Whoo. Okay, first thing I'm gonna do so you I should have if into combat situation. I would have three actions, right? But with the amount of time you have, you have about three turns before they return. Okay, so I have nine actions, all right?

The first action I'm going to do is turn on my Speedy Gonzales. Give me plus to speed, what's the first thing? I see. Oh, and then I'll do a Pathfinder check. Let me dou a Pathfinder, so I can try to check out this article. Architecture plus 4. All right. 12, very good. All right, so that's actually good enough. Again, this place is security, not as good as say the collectors mention. It's just a warehouse and you find a pretty Linear Security. System got four levels.

The first thing you're presented with is a password lock. Okay, that's weird. Okay, so with my final third action in the set of three, I'll do a back door. Try to bypass the lock, right? And I got a 520. Use your inspiration. I have to. Yeah. All right. Re-rolling 88. Yes, that's good enough, seven. So you get past the password and you come up into the next stage of this security and you find a whisk stupid little things. All right, well, it's got attack me first.

Yes. Does, I'll just do my speed. Check to try to dodge it so I get a plus 2 at the Speedy Gonzales. Hopefully it's good enough. I rolled the 12, you're all the 12. Yeah. Oh, they roll the tape. All right. Awesome. So I'm able to move out of the way and in the, in the net, I look like a, like a chief, Native American Chieftain. Oh, cool. That's my avatar in the net with

like two big tomahawks. Well, the Wisp is this all above light with a Single molecule, I crackling with energy and it it looks the wrong way and you managed to dash out of its view. All right, I dash out of its view and now I'm going to give it some hurt. I put the two tomahawks together and then they form into this giant war hammer. And I take a big swing at this thing. And I'd say by you ugly piece of crap, and I hit it with the 13. Yeah. Oh yeah. No. It splits in half.

And as he opens the inside of it, Drops onto the ground, like an egg fries on the ground. Turns to black turns, to Ash floats up into the air. You've been terminated, I guess 13 was, you're unlocking, the next floor is what it was gone. It is a bunch of files relating to the deliveries that the company does. Okay, I'll definitely do an ID to extract the file. Well, you find a few things, one of them is of note because you find a fury.

Robotics business card perfect. And there's a note on the business card that says deliver here. Exactly what I was looking for 1225 sleigh, way night City and C-17 1578, I download this file into my cyber deck, take it in, and then I'm assuming I'm at the bottom floor here. There is one more fool. Gotta go to the next floor. Don't I do a bunch of actions. I did the banhammer I did. The ID I got one more and then three more after that. So I'll go to the next floor. What do we got?

Do you find a killer shits? All right, well, it's gonna hit me. It's gonna hit me and here's my role of 30. Yeah, but I rolled a one. Oh yeah. Yes. So, because like tips for trips over and smacks his head on the Digital Ground, And as he comes up, his nose is completely pressed flat on his digital face. Us all of that back. Yeah. Okay. I gotta I got a slide or I gotta Just Jack out. I can. I can safely Jack out. I wanted to leave a virus and a cloak. I can do a cloak.

Now I'm at the bottom. Yeah, I have three actions. Let me do a cloak. All right, I'm going to Why are you cloaking specifically? So what I'm cloaking is just clocking that anybody has been in this, net architecture or it has been here. I don't want anyone to know that I've been here so the next Netrunner has to beat a 14 which I rolled a 10, okay? Now if that explodes yeah that's

always does explode rolling? Okay 18:18 is what the next Netrunner will have to beat to to trace back what I did and then I will Jack out. Cool. You jack out as As the weld comes to again the office person comes back in, right? Well he just won't shut up. That's what I'm telling you you know listen what was your name again? Jackie. Jackie listen, this has been great but you know I quit I don't think this is for me. This isn't my kind of gig. You're not wearing a hat. I'm not surprised.

I was. I'm now wearing the Hat. It's just not a good fit for me. You know, I'm not being funny but you don't look like you've got a lot of upper body strength. May I, I really don't, you know? Didn't guys. Have got out there beautiful. I know beautiful Supple men that are just that's not me.

I'm not a supplement so Jackie I wish you the best and you know I would just just you know as a friend the you go a little heavy on the eyeshadow I would go a little less just you know professional like if you got in your face you're being malicious. I wasn't being malicious but you know it's okay. Fine whatever. Okay. Any heads-up? They closed the Or behind you in a half. People don't like the truth. Okay, examiners. As you come out to the to the walkway, you can see retro still

talking about this. OSHA violations. Absolutely. You. And is going to be the way to make sure that all of your benefits are but broccoli - exactly you deserve people community and not just like companies exactly why I should just the company's billion br-2. We have human ones as well and we can unionize the make sure that we get the benefits. We need where we see time and is giving the neck cut image of like I've done it. Let's go.

So anyways, listen for right now, I'm taking all these, I'm going to make sure I put in a good word for you. Three. Right now that Jackie is going to make sure that they get the full brunt of the power of Osha and believing please think about what I said about unionizing. It works to your benefit and you said there was a newsletter. Yes, yes. You can find it at this website and I'll give them some oppression.

All right. We'll talk about unionizing and probably be murdered by the company, but thanks very much as we head out. First one stone I'm done. As we head out. Yeah, this odds odds, I tip it odds, I tip it evens. I don't sounds good. And I rolled a even I don't, I put my hand on the porta potty and I think about it and I just hear how much he's in pain and I just say hold on there. And you hear him take a big

sigh. Okay, the drunks are starting to kick in. The old Amish and you hear him, like, I use some hand sanitizer and he tries to open the door. I'm Gonna Roll that. No, no, no. Oh, that's just a 5. That's not good enough. And he shakes the Port-A-Potty and it falls over and you start to hear something pouring in two different places. That blue liquid. Oh, geez.

Hey, we'll be back. I'm gonna go ahead and take the pin out of the door and open it open, and he rolls out and just poo water and chemicals, pour into the back of that, of the, of the building. Merry Christmas asshole. All right, got the Poo Place away from me. So fine. So confusing. Christians. I feel bad. I've been in that situation before. No one says anything. Let's go get my duck. Yes. You're so close to getting. All right. We're in the car. We have an address. Okay.

So what did you get Terminus? You got an address. That's right. And I show them the business card. This is it on the back. It says delivery here and don't worry I made sure to leave no Trace Good good. Oh good work. I guess that both of you actually that went a lot smoother. I'm there were a lot more people than I expected. So I'm just going to say that it really does chat. My hide that they made him wear. Santa hats over their hard hats. It's extremely unsafe.

It is unsafe. It is it is and I'm glad you were there. I had no idea. You knew so much about the yeah violations in the workplace. Well, when you run your own business, you have to make sure that you're up to code. Is it safe to have a TV as ahead? Not really, no. Can't take baths, huh? Well, I mean, I know I can I could put a cover like a little ring collar around, I'd say well, so has a dust-covered. I've used to future, but yeah, so inconvenient. Okay, well, we're gonna slay

way. It did not take long for you guys to get Get to slay way and you arrive at the fury robotics office. Oh gosh. All right. All right. Well I'm assuming this is a open to the public outside, the front of the building in front of you is a horribly McCobb. Seen the area is standing up a bunch of different Taxidermy creatures all set up in kind of a Christmas. Tableau, there's a broken reindeer robot. There's a, what, looks like a stuffed Steve in position as an

elf and it's pretty gross. It's kind of horrific and Looks like someone's trying to ruin Christmas. Wow, this is actually French. It's really depressing. Looking at all this, isn't it? Yeah. What's so what is this is this some sort of display that they're putting on for Christmas? I don't know what the Steve is not unsettling us. Most part of this, his eyes move towards your at trip. Oh God. I don't know. Did he just move? He's I think he's trying to talk

to you, dude, it's frightening. Can I figure out what's wrong with them? Yeah rope section ice that his lips have been sewn. Shut your rod in 1900. He doesn't seem to be able to move his limbs. Or any part of his body whatsoever, I'll use my tool hand and you take out my exacto knife slowly cut. Open the soda. Typically he's mad. Who is dressed like Santa who sometimes? Well that's just a shit Santos Santos Fury. Okay I'm toast Fury. The one who bought the one who

bought the duck. Retro. Ask your weird friend. If they know anything about the duck Channel. Do you know anything about my duck? A duck? Just kill it, just kill the same. Get rid of it, snapping, you do not need to check to do that because he is horrific lelia mobile. You've now just killed a Steve outside and his head is now hanging off sideways, a little bit on the body and it looks even worse this This Fury robotics, what?

What do they do? Wow, I don't understand what this all is. Well, local expert. See 1414? Yeah, that's enough. The, as you're saying this, you lift your foot and there's like a little pamphlet on the ground. It says Fury of robotic, get up, pick it up. But on it, it says an animal robot experts custom robots made-to-order, satisfaction guaranteed seasonal speciality Goods. They Robots for fun. Hmm. So we better move quickly. Are you? A duck? Might be a robot.

Yeah. They might do some weird. Cyberduck thing. I'm guessing you don't want to cyberduck. I'm going on in by him. All right. You guys regret Dory. Going to look around the building. You just kind of fucking go through the front pocket. What they just told me? I gotta say, mama Mallard and taking up. I take out my heavy pistol. Yeah, we're going, we're going in my duck. I am my pistol. In the direction. Crap my assault rifle. Right?

This the front door was open. So as you walk inside to the front room, there are more of those dudes. Similar. They're not wearing hats and they're on either side of the double doors and as you walk into this front lobby area as a little waiting area on the right, there's a desk on the left and a femme looking receptionist sitting at the desk. Kind of shocked that you've walked in with a gun and the two guards who were talking about something now.

Look at your goat or pork roll for initiative FAQ. Here we go, dude, Terminus. There's this lovely Moment of clarity as you burst in because you notice that the guys on either side of the door are indeed a little distracted and you get the first shot. Awesome. The first thing I'm going to do is just grab. First of all, I'm going to pop out my wall. Vers the in my, in my right hand.

It is an arisaka, Okami wall over, and in my other hand, I have my Constitution arms pH. 34 very heavy pistol. So what I'm going to do is, I'm just going to grab this guy to directly north of me and just use them as a human shield. So I'm going to roll. That should be a brawling. Yes, definitely. It's my brawling versus their brawling. Basically, it sounds good. All right, roll the 2000. They rolled a 13-0. Yes. I'm like a spider like a Jiu-Jitsu. Get on them.

Grab his neck. Get behind. Put him in a choke hold. Put the gun against his head. No funny business. So your friend gets it and that should end my turn. All right. And you're gonna stay, just going to have a threat. Nice, excellent. Okay, so you have the one security person and that hold, I will aim So press like, kind of moves her her long trench coat and kind of Billows, like an anime character as it Billows out.

She pulls out her, very Chrome, fancy Decked Out, assault rifle, and just aims at the other one, at the other guard, and, and holds the aim she doesn't shoot just yet. But she'll just kind of keep an eye on the other one. Just, we have some questions. We need some help. Nobody here needs to get hurt. Says the woman behind the counter, the guard in front of you, looks kind of angry. There's not there's not fully agree with what you said, not into it. He gets a little angry.

He's already holding his assault rifle. And he just points it back at you and goes and pulls the trigger. No rose 2700. That's definitely a hit. Yes, 21 damage. Oh my God Hee-Haw. All right what's your armor? My armor is 12 or this good SP is 12. Yeah great. So deduct 12 from One. And then also minus one from your armor. Well, that constitutes funny business in my book. Yeah, yep. All right. Alright next retro is going to do it.

Retro does best and he's going to pull out his blessed shotgun named Ash and put one right into the guard. That shot press nice. Nice 17. Yes, they are within that range. Yes. Yeah, great. You totally hit him for 17. Image that Jack gets hit in the chest and he steps back puts his hand, back onto the desk behind him and sort of lowers the

assault rifle a little bit. My Lord fucking shotgun to the chest but wait, there's more and you hit him again a blade in his armor and a piece of his front plate, flies off and sticks into the wall and the receptionist screams. And it is the other Jack Stern who tries to get out of the grapple. Okay? So let's just do a brawling versus Brawn. Oh, that's a good brawling. Yes, it is. Okay, I'll put my three remaining luck points into this. All right, it's very important to hold on.

Yeah. Now, okay, so that is plus 3. So 18 enough as he gets out of the grapple. He Reels his fist back and smacks you in the face. You can try. Oh God. You try pretty good. He tried pretty good and all evasion. If you can beat that, no, you cannot beat that. Okay. Now it's you for 10 damage. All right, it doesn't pierce. My armor. Oh waiting. It's not blades. Run. Is it a? Is it a melee weapon? You don't wear a helmet. He punched you in the head.

Well, then that's double damage. I take 20 to the Head. Whoo. Oh, getting me to half HP. I real back as he smacks me in the head and now I have negative modifiers. That everything that's fine. Excellent. Okay, excellent. Yeah. All right. He takes a step back and then hides behind the coffee table a little bit and pulls out his gun. But that's all he gets do this, then I'm guessing we've made quite a commotion here. Mhm, I'm in a run for this door

here and just like barge my way. A in and just look and try to look for the duck. The duel is unlocked and you burst through it. And at the end of the room, there's a really big dude. Okay, what's all that? He pulls out his gun, help? We, I was just attacked in the lobby by some Tufts and I have, I'm like, have a bloody nose. There's some Intruders in here. Roll, persuasion, very good sneaky. Okay. Persuasion, 15. Whoo this guy's not very wash.

Lay roll against that. What we think human perception? A box of rocks is a box of rocks. Absolute how he has a 2 gives it to in human perception. He has a to you are quite far away and he still tries to shoot you in that moment, as you walk through, as kind of a an As it were. Okay, but he's a big guy. He doesn't carry an assault rifle, but he does carry a big fuck-off heavy pistol that fits in his big, big hand.

Okay, he rolls the 13, which does not hit you and the bullet flies into the wall and you hear it. Ricochet off the metal frame of the door that has a rate of fire to. So he tries again. Yeah, he needed a 20 or more if I'm honest because it's a long Corridor, as many roles are 17 and it pings off the door frame again weirdly in the same spot one thing, right? And he runs forward and jumps behind the sofa in the middle of the hallway. Okay, all right.

Well, I just got shot, I am not happy. So I kind of wipe the blood off of my, my face a little bit and I shoot back at this, this guy with my assault rifle. Let's see what I do. Oh nice 22, that's a large number. Okay. Yeah. I don't I don't think there's much chance of him. I mean I mean Should I roll evasion or not? Even bother doesn't feel like I should well if he has a reflex of eight or higher, he contracted. Yeah. Well he didn't leave a sad end to the bullet.

Yeah, he tries to make a Dodge but he still leaning on the desk and as he pushes up he actually pushes into the bullet at breasts. You do how much damage 25 I see right back at you buddy. You hit him below. Half Health wasn't already here with the shotgun to yeah but now he's below half health. Health Point. Yeah. And as he's doing that, he tries to steady himself, but the weight of his own body is too much. And as he puts his hands behind him, his elbow snaps the wrong way.

And he loses control of his right arm. Jesus didn't have to be this way and he tries to point his gun at you, but he's having real trouble because it's a two handed weapon. Well, when retro here is this snap and he screams, he's just going to start laughing. There he is and he'll shoot again. No, no. Okay. So your gun jams. It fall on just doesn't fire. You will have to fix that before you can fire it again.

Oh, shoot. It didn't go - so the gun, didn't explode, but now you can't use the gun until you fix it. Okay? Fucking on any other than anything else I can do can kind of if it's a rate of fire one then. Yeah, that's all you can do so ready to fire 20. Wait, can I use the other Barrow? This would be to Barrow. I like that a lot. I think that's very cool. Yes. So from now on you can only fire this once per turn until it's Janet. Yeah, that's cool.

I like that. Okay, so I'm just gonna laugh even harder now because it's jammed, it's like I guess the Christmas spirit must be looking down on you tonight. To tell me how you think. Tell me how Managed to kill both people in here with that bullet because one's already half dead. Okay, so I'm just going to grab grab him, drag him over to the other guy, all right? And I'm going to ask tell me the Christmas alphabet say it right now and it will save you a lot.

I don't know say the Christmas elf and way. No I wasn't brought hope without kind of thing in my. Don't know. Enough about tell me. The alphabet coming to Christmas. Alphabet a said 498 were not very literate. I will see that. I know how to spell zebra and panada because it's in a song, be a on a on a US, you slept. And I'll put the, I'll put it right between both their heads and let go and it explodes and you managed to blow through both

of their heads with the bullet. It doesn't incredible amount of damage and both of them fall dead on the ground. And the receptionist behind the desk, just scream prison, retro you're fine too. Thomas. On the other hand had five isn't a hallway with a really big dude, and he's not happy. Not happy at all. Well, you know you've got me all wrong. If you think I'm going to shoot this guy instead I'm going to try to barge into this Warehouse.

Does that door look unlocked? Yes, it is unlocked. Okay, I just shoulder barge in to this Warehouse with a normal move action. And then I'm going to use a perception. Check to see if I could spot a goddamn duck in here. All right, when you burst into the room, there are two guys in here. The room had really heavy doors and they have not heard the fight outside, because I've rolled very loaf their perception, okay? But just like chilling in here

and I like, I just I fell. I mean I'm suing you guys. I'm literally going to see you guys. There's huge, I was trying to talk to Jane. She's not being very helpful at all. I came in here, looking for a napkin or something. To wipe myself, first aid, kits in the office. Oh perfect! I'll head over there right now, roll persuasion, because I want to see, if you give up the ghost 1500, they rolled a 15, but I'm going to say you're covered in blood. Thud and that's relatively

convincing. So I'm going to say that they believe you. Okay perfect. You don't have long though because obviously the guy in the hallway saw you come in here. So you've got not a lot of time and got like second, so I'm going to use my perception. See if I spot the duck in here for the duck is not in here. God damn it. All right, I run straight to the office. All right, I'm gonna try the door. Do I still have time to try to get the door? I think. So okay. Yeah, definitely.

Is it open? Yes, okay. Walk-in bloodied nose as you walk in. There's a turret on the ceiling and it, it detects you and starts to acquire Target, and look at them for a first aid kit. There it is, the opposite of a first aid kit. Yet incredibly quickly, maybe on my next turn of calm. All right? And we return to prison retro in the lobby on gonna take my gun and just go up to to the receptionist Jane and just hold it up to her. She's now a hostage look, where

is the duck? Send us to know it sounds awesome. Where is Santos? Roll persuasion, even though you're holding a gun prescription, Meanwhile, this is happening. I'm gonna try to unjam my gun. Okay, smart weapons. That got it. I think you got 10, 21. Yeah, you managed to free up, but you do lose to Mo in the process. It was, it was stuck in there. That's what happened, I double Jam, this the wrong Barrel. Yeah, no you persuade, this receptionist?

The office has a torrid also do I just walk in. You have access to the third here? Yes, turn it. Turn it off and 7s. In the other room, you can start to hear the target. Leans down and shuts off. Don't kill me. I just I have no, it goes, I don't do, I just do the bureaucracy. Relax, who else is in the basement with Santos, or is it just him? It's him, the dock and like all of this robot shit. Great. All right, I Where is the basement? The stairs are in the office.

It's underneath the. The math that says, do not remove Matt. All right, right? Well, Merry Christmas to you or whatever holiday that you prefer. Great. I'm going to say this. Go spend time with your family. Now I'm just gonna leave right now, the rooms 10 9 and they leave. They've left. They leave the building and you can hear them running and they run away. All right, I guess the officer principal bus through this door, not knowing that.

There are other people that may be waiting for us. Yeah. Yeah, as you bust through the door, you actually see the Stacked Jack starting from the double doors, about to open it. And you heard gunshots, like there's no way this guy's gonna be like, oh hello. Yeah, there's blood on the floor. Okay, so if I can I will yeah you hit him. That's a 20 and then I roll with salt rifle, 23 damage like okay. So the stock Jacks are a little more tough but Same.

He's not gonna graduate, you caused a decent amount of damage, and he actually, stumbles, and leans against the wall on mine. Yeah. One, just one voice, I believe. It's Remy's turn an editor, but he starts to grab the shotgun on his back. Row is going to go. I have you know you know as an had enough love Shelly. My assault rifle 18th. Yeah, you hit, he needed a 70 Nomo, and the bullets.

Ripped through the air, you hit him for 12 damage and because he was already falling over, he falls over fully and his hand falls away. And he can't get his shotgun on his next turn. He's going to have to grab his pistol. But he tries to shoot you, and he's in the disorientated state. He rolled a 10, which is terrible. He shoots and it pings off exactly the same point where it. Ricocheted before. When he was shooting Terminus, that would be me.

He gets a rate of fire to he tries to shoot again. Oh, and he hits you Remmy 04:11 damage. That's your Listen to walk. Yeah, bro, completed by one fuck you LG Hotel fire, it'll bounce off, Remy's jacket, it'll actually rip the collar. A little bit of like a fucker. I just have them that you just go to sleep and I roll 2000 shit and you're loading well today, I know. Yeah. Real damage that hits. He's also a mobile and lying on the ground.

So isn't that right? 1814 as he lifts his arm to take another shot. You shoot him and one of the bullets go straight through his right eye and he slumps over dead. It's a very cool shot. Hell yeah, cool. All right. This is easy, father Lala fuck you. And as you enter the, the next room, there are two guys who are wearing like safety ear, where? Did you see the accident? But the mom. Yes. Yes, we're with him. Yeah. Yes. Thumbs up. Good day. I wave and they wave back.

Merry Christmas. Yes! I'm going to try to use some kind of Primal sign language to say, where is the office and he kind of points towards the North West part of the room. Thank you. And there, you see, Terminus standing quite bloody staring at the turret, which is no longer activate, you know, he's just like has hands up. Like oh God. As soon as that happens Remy's going to sneak behind and he's just going to put both hands on his shoulders really quick

Christ you all right? Yeah but it's a dead end. I don't know where this goddamn duck is. I think I might know Chris got the download on it. This took a lot of effort but it's on this Matt. And I walk over to the mat that one that says, do not remove this mat. The one that says do not remove this Matt and I Did it and underneath is a unlocked trap door. Look at that. Perfect. Let's do. Yeah. I love you guys since your rule Breakers. Well you know, I'm bleeding.

So you guys go forward. Are you all right by the way you look no, I'm not. I'm running on catch fumes. All right, before you go downstairs, retro you search the room for a 14 definitely enough and you find the first aid kit, but I mentioned it. Oh, that's right. There is a first there was and there's a there's a skin graft patch. If you use that, it's to d610 perfect. So that's a better idea. I was going to give you, you know, a cigarette broken in half

and put it up your nostrils. A 10-10 nice. You gain 10, HP back from that. No longer is it slowly starts to zoo to dissolve into your own skin? Perfect. It will probably always leave a scar since it's not a very good scores are cool in night City. Yes, they are. And now, this guy has a Hmm. You had downstairs with that? Has to do with the duck? Yeah, we definitely had the out sticks. Yeah. Right. Your head downstairs. All right. Roll perception. Quick question.

Yes. Would my perception be a negative? Because Remy also just did roll up a j of Jack Frost. The smoke of course Remy. Yes. You're at a disadvantage I must say, A minus 2 because that's a terrible pun. All right, it's an actual name, but okay, I don't care. You brought it, it's Christmassy as shit. So yeah, the Christmas. All right, as you get down to the bottom of the building, you're in the basement now.

And in the basement, as you come down the stairs on the left, there are two Surfers, it coffee table, little seat on its own. At the end of the room. There's a person sitting at a desk typing away and there's like cybertek all around them and then, there are two sets. Shelves in this room covered in cyberware and bits of robots and right in the middle of the room. There is a large unactivated robot reindeer. Oh God. That's concerning everyone rolls stealth Boy. All right.

Remy and Terminus. You guys get down quiet as anything? Press did you get on first or last? I would have gone down first probably good because if you were gonna go down last than the other two would have to roll evasion, When you fall down the last stair and fall onto the ground that boots is big like for walking. Yeah. There they are stylish. They're not practical it's not major fool you don't get hurt or anything but you make enough

noise that the person the desk. Here's you and turns around hell are you and there is this large man dressed as a green Santa and then covered in. He's got a bandolier full of like Cyber Tech tools for adjusting and creating robots. What is this all about? Look, we're just here for the duck. Okay? Doc, yes it belonged to somebody else. Technically isn't your duck. I paid good money for it. I'm gonna turn it into a robot. Like this reindeer. Also you're trespassing, get through them.

And the rain, Derek initiative, and we still hidden though, you guys are Robert. First of all, the bloody same. Got it. And I rolled a really bad initiative. That's okay. I think I'll be okay. It's not the worst. It's not the worst. Yeah, I'm the worst. The reindeer starts to boot up but there is enough time for Terminus to do something perfect. What would I have to roll to throw a grenade in between the two of them? Oh, you want the DB? Yeah, I want to know the distance.

Basically. I'd say your average living room sighs. You know maybe 150 feet square. Okay. So So not too high of a roll. Okay, so I'm going to pull out one of my two armor-piercing grenades. Oh shit, our that are decorated with Christmas lights and decorations all around them sick and I brought it for just an occasion. As this, this one is called Vixen is one of the reindeer, right? Yeah, Vixen.

This one's called Vixen. I pull the pin and I toss it in between the two of them and I say, Yippee. Ki-yay, she said that. All right, never mind and I just throw it. Oh no. All right, it's a grenade though. This here. So two things have to roll. The issue is the robotic reindeer is booting up.

So it gets like a - 82 evasion because it's a fucking robot and still manages to do it takes three steps to the right and this this thing explodes in the middle of the room and then hits you Terminus very much road for is still. Yeah, everyone roll evasion. Oh, I'll give you. I'll give you a few everyone coronavirus in including you Terminus. Is it comes back to you have enough time and a very comedic way and filled you guys 19.

Nice, Remy good enough for us. Actually, I have good points in this. You all managed to do it, the DVD was 15. So you just Got it there stress. But the grenade actually, like, goes up the stairs and you hear it explode. And then you hear kind of like, electronic shrapnel. And you've fairly certain, you've destroyed the turret upstairs. And that'll be my turn. Then, Santo picks up his arm and

goes. I bet you didn't see this Christmas present, pulls out his arm and two, spines flash out from his forearm and across Boat Lifts out from his arm. He fires it acted as a Crip and you I threw the grenade so he's pointing at you. Yeah, it does 13 damage. Okay, I need you to roll a vision. If you have a kripp fail on this, you get pinned to the wall. Okay, I like that. I mean I don't like that but I like that.

Oh, you're on. All right, so I'm going to say that although you will take some damage, you can throw the arrow back at him as a projectile, okay? I'll say that it hits me Square in the shoulder and actually doing to damage a bleeding. My armor by one and I pull it out and flip it around in my fingertips and toss it back at him. Great expert at darts. Yeah, exactly, that's what I do. It it does. 15 damage blades. His armor. These arrows, by the way, I play Drama by 2. Not 1.

So well, that's fun. Yeah, so he takes two to. His armor takes a big big ol here and he's down a little bit. Hell yeah. Calls it up. They do hurt and throws it away. He can only fire once with that. He takes a step behind the reindeer for cover and so he's going to be kind of difficult to hit. So I am going to use My role ability for the solo combat awareness and I'm going to try to spot a weakness in this

Rapier sick. So I'm going to aim for the reindeer and a tackle to we get 22 definitely hit without. Come on double sixes, 20 damage. Oh you got two sixes. Got two sixes, that's double damage. Okay, I mean I'm gonna say I'm gonna say that that's 40 damage. Age. And for the record, it has 40 health. So you take a moment in the basement and there's this Clarity that only comes in the

middle of a fight for you press. And if you look at the reindeer as it turns its head, you notice that it's made of two halves and because it's still being worked on, they aren't quite aligned. And as it turns its head, the two pieces on a line at just a point where you can see its main control unit in its head, you have a clear shot. There's no armor in the way. Bullseye and in those moments you fire a a beautiful spiral of

bullet as it Cascades into this. This piece the head twists to the side and the robot falls to the ground Fizzles dies. Gasps Merc this, this grin. This like big smirk comes from Chris's face after this and she looks to the other two and and Winx And yes, Express badass is the word you're looking for. Thank you very much. And I'm gonna just try to like move a little into cover. Like, I don't know if there's a little something I can. Yeah, you could hide behind the

shelves, just that. Yeah, I'll just get a little bit of cover. Their sounds good. Bottom of the stairs. This Michelle's in the right, you sneak in and kind of slide in and really flatten yourself against the wall, still reeling over. The amazing shot just made and retro, it's finally, your turn. All right. Rose going to descend down the rest of the stairs into the room and he's going to look towards Santos joynton. CD drive takes a big puff, looks

at him with his assault rifles. Shelly and says where's my duck? It's time for a facedown. I'm going to see if this stops the fight. Are you cool plus reputation? Plus 1 D 10? Your face. It's not good for Santos. Oh no. Oh well oh shit. Did you want your dog back? Yes, give me back my Mallard. Now if I if I give you the doc Can I live? I promise on my shotgun Ash. I will not kill you bro persuasion and again I rolled a 2. Yeah.

So it's basically a bloody zero. So let's not worry about that, shall we? And he opens a drawer and pulls out a cage and put it on his desk and there in the cage. Is my melon? Yes. Mama It was worth it, don't come back, ho ho, ho Ram is going to take Mama, Mallard out back. Go ahead and put my Mallard inside of his jacket. He'll he'll lead both Billy broke, press, and Terminus at the door.

And as he leaves, he's going to look back at Santos and go, but I never promised on Shelly and I'm going to unload both my own 2005, grenade launchers Adam. All right. Roll it roll. It will take a man's duck. Yeah. Now that hits roll damage. The only one of them hits but roll damage. 27 damage. Yeah. Now you he goes underneath underneath half-elf, the one of the grenade explodes over his left leg and the bottom half of his left leg is now gone well

and he falls to the ground. You're pretty sure that he has the knowledge to fix his own leg. So he may not die because he's a really good cybertek human, but he's not Going anywhere. And there are two guards in the warehouse who have no idea any of this happened. I was gonna leave my business card with some point. They're gonna find that boss with like half a leg. Yeah, it's all right. I'm a Rebel Without a Cause. Oh man, let's just I'm going home. I'm home. Leave the fury.

Robotics office heading back to no latency. Safe in the knowledge that this Christmas Remy as is done back quack quack. What's up guys? I'm Jon. Jon the wise if you want to find out what I do and you love cyberpunk. Well, youtube.com slash John, John. The wise is where you can find me and you can also find me on all social media with the same handle. John John, the wise? See you guys, in the net. Hello, everybody. I'm Tracy, also known as miss

magitek. You can find the at twitch.tv slash miss magitek or youtube.com slash mismatched attack. Thank you guys so much for having me. And from us here at no latency. We hope that you have a very seasoned, whether you celebrate Christmas or not night City and no latency will always welcome. Merry Christmas. Thank you for joining us on our adventure once again here at no latency. Don't forget to follow us on Twitter at no latency pod, check out our website at no latency podcast.com.

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Hi, just your friendly neighborhood, cat cleric, odd thrill. And here's a word from your sponsor, save the date. In Tales of Legend, there are stories of Heroes who stand for the good of the people fight, back the dark Forces that defile the land, and bring peace to the World by a hag. Yeah, my friends. Let me get stabbed while I'm sleeping help me and then there's these assholes gods don't exist. Yeah, his kiss me it was mentioned be okay.

Okay, at dinner table. We don't talk about religion. Okay, that is never stopped you before. Yeah, every Thursday. I'm sorry. You're gonna let it Crackle. Have a flaming sword in one hand and a singing sword in the other. Have you thought this listen, I asked as a courtesy. I don't need to do any of y'all. After permission listen. As a group of absolute Maniacs, try and save the world. There aren't minutes ago. Yes, there are.

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