Conversations About Vagina

kicking the girl out of the car. Yes, so let me tell you what happened. Still, So the recording took place inside of a Dodge Challenger and when the footage started, it was a girl just saying, you just lay it fun. You just gonna kick me outcause you ain't get no pussy. He's like, Hell, yeah, you ain't. I ain't sunk with y'all. Take to the airport now, fil me'all flew y'all here. You don't give me no pussy. So they're pulling up to the terminal and uh, he's like, gonna get the

funk out of the car. Get out the car. She kind of man lane lane mass nigger just send me my just testing my confirmation number. He was like, I canceled that flight. He's getting out the car giving her back, Like you cancel the flight. Yeah, you can fill yourself on all this because you're like, yeah, you're playing with

the cheeks. You playing with the cheeks. And what I was able to get was he was he flew her to a town, to either his town or to some vacation place, and when they decided, like when she got there, she decided she was not going to give him no vagina, and at that point he wasn't going for it. He turned around a ticket to the airport or either the next day he took her to the airport and cancer the plane ticket and left it up to her to

get home. Yes, what do you think step well, see see, I trust your wisdom in this as man who's been married for years. What do you think about that? Well? I have two different points off you. First of all, um, that was pretty shadow of him just to bring her out, to fly her out with the intenda just having sex with her, right show. But because she was such a

charming personality. Oh don't listen, look, let me click, Because I got to two points of this right, I don't know if i'd win as far as canceling her flights. I'm not mad at him for taking her back home, because if that was his main intention, just to give him some pussing, he should have took her back to the airport. But I don't know if I had wanted

cancel flights and stuff like that. You know, because the thing, you know, he brought her up there, He's utterly responsible to get her back home in a correct way of speaking, you see what I'm saying. No, I also disagree because he had a responsibility. Let me finish my let me finish my point. But she was an idiot for bringing her ass out of town without no backup plan or plan in mind in case this dude trip, because she knew she wouldn't give him no pussy before she went

out there. She knew that would you. So so let me ask you something now, this version is still no. Have you ever flew a woman somewhere right when you was a single or he was too young? Yeah, I've been married a long time. Seven when I was close enough. Because you wasn't always married. It was a time in your adulthood. It was on this small window. Well, I just did. I gotta remember, see, I didn't just beat Maria and marry her the second day I met her.

We went to according period. We were a boyfriend and girlfriend for a long time. So when I was single, I'll tell you this, I was always a gentleman if a girl didn't want to co operated to do this. I didn't never kick nobody out of the car, didn't never do no weird ship like that. I just didn't funk with him. So let me ask you a question with your wisdom. Now, would you fly a woman? Do you think it's wise? Why else would a man be

flying you out of state? Well, you know, she probably in this case, I think she probably try to run one over on this guy. She probably wanted to go out there and travel. She wanted to travel. Ain't nobody could turn down a free trip. Though she could have came out here and saw some other friends and used him to get her audio. Right, So I'm not mad at him for sending her home. I'm not mad him

for sending her home. And in a way, it was her responsibility to make sure she got home because she came b it just depending on somebody else, and she knew she wouldn't go get that man no draws before she came out here. Women know when they can get somebody to pussy. When the first second woman meets you, she knows if she's gonna have sex. She's just gonna play a little game kind of you did what I'm saying.

I think they all play that game kind of where they want to make if a girl really likes you, dog, she's gonna try to make you wait for the trend because she don't want you to look at her like in the hole? Am I right, Peter? A lot of women, not everybody, Because you can have a you can have a long, extensive relationship with a girl and get you some pussy the first night. She might have just been feeling you like that. That may not be your normal

get down. But for the most part, a woman knows if they if they are going to partake upon a sexual act with you for the first time they meet you, within the first thirty seconds. Why would you board a flight to somebody you don't really know without believing that that's what they I had this conversation on Van Lake this podcast right Higher Learning, and I was talking to

his co host, a lovely lady Brandy was there. Was funny, but she was saying to me how women should have the same freedom of sexual liberation that they believe a man has. Right where it's like, okay, well, if I want to just sleep with a man, nobody should judge me for it. And I'm like, well, the reality is you do have the freedom of it, right, But you're worried about people judging you. That's the problem. You gotta just like I'm a crip. I'm not worried about what

you think of crips. So I'm gonna be a crip. Probably in this particular situation. If when a man and a woman meet each other ninety nine times out of a hundred probably nine ninety nine out of ten thousand, probably nine million, nine hundred and ninety nine, nine million, nine hundred and ninety nine thousand, nine hundred ninety nine times out of a hundred million or ten million, whatever that number was, right, if a man sees you, or if a man interacting, he wants to have sex with you,

that's the initial thought. Somebody lying you out of town? What else? Why would you think he's flying you out of town without this? And it's that I was telling Brandy. I was talking to Brandon. I was talking to brandy cousin Mika, and they was like, well, maybe he just enjoys my company and conversation. I'm like, we can talk on the phone. I could talk on the phone. That

is such bullshit. That is such a treat. That is no because, like I said, that woman knew she wasn't gonna get that man no pussy when she came out of it, when she brought rass out here and with her. Now, this is what I would tell her. You knew you wouldn't working with that dude like that, so you should have never took that trip or or being prepared to take your ass on on your way in case he started trip. And I think a woman should go out

of town like that. I think anytime a woman goes out of town, especially going to go men that she don't know, even if she can want to go, she knew, she should already have a backup planing in score. She should have money with her. She should have in case this dude as a psychopath, she made need to go get her a hotel and go get her own flights back. She don't know this motherfucker. You should not get on

a plane. That's a side point. Yeah, that's exactly my being responsible as a woman, like you're speaking now almost like more so as a father, and I get that, and I respect that. And giving advice as you know that the dudes and don't of being somewhat intelligent is important. This is a matter of principle. Has to deal with the delusional worldview that women have where they obsessively overvalue themselves and think that they're more important than they really are. Like, well,

a lot of women don't like take an accountability. To Peter, it's always a man slot. We've certainly certainly didn't if we didn't cross that ridge. We we built it, if we didn't just cross it. So it's like it's like the sixth Street Bridge right now, what was going on in we're playing on that bridge steel Literally we do donuts on that bridge. We're hitting up graffiti. That is our that we actually built that bridge. We no Ceilings has established women live in the world with no accountability.

That's our thing. That's literally if we made a T shirt that would be the greatest no Ceiling slogo. We could almost change the name of the show from a reference to ceilings to a reference to accountability. Yes, that's how much we dance in that arena that you just referred to. It to me, the issue is exactly what you just said, Like why why? I mean, like a while ago you were grilling me, you kind of about face. We have the whole podcast episode about why I'm this single?

So long as you were like, you don't just like the company of a woman, and I was like that the worst part. No, I think, No, that's not true. I think you can like the company of a woman. I just don't think if you're flying somewhere to a state to meet up with a guy, the desire is just your company for sure. If you guess again, it's not impossible. There are some guys that are handicapped and a penis don't work. We're getting into that obscure abortion

justifications outlier territory now. I'm just saying, so, yes, I'm totally aware, because people can't help but find those obscure you know, singled out silly explanations of really grand ideas. What you know, where combatting. So I'm aware of those things. I'm just saying, if a guy flies you out of town, i'd say a hundred percent. He wants to hit that thing. Even though I love Maria to death, I'm my wife

with all my heart. I wouldn't have been married to for thirty some of my years if I didn't put I got told her one day when I first met her. My main intention was getting pains everything. Whenever a million meets a woman the first time, about how about you? About no? But that's the thing, though, bro, every man's intends to get something. And what happens he is you're using mead a woman and you find that you've got a lot of stuff in common with them. They become

a friend, and that's our relationships start. Right With some women, it begins and ends with the sixth will he because they don't have nothing else to offer you mm hmm yeah. The general rule of thumb on this is largely if a man is spending an ordinate amount of money for a small period of time, let's think it through. You know, Like, there's a million places I could take a girl to dinner. If I choose the most fucking expensive one and pay for a few extra rounds or thirty dollar cocktails, we

could have eaten. We could have had a steak in the Martini any goddamn Well, that's another thing. You know what, I think women should be required to do because they know this is scientific to bro a woman woman discovered. A woman knows if she's going to sleep with you the first thirty seconds to one minute after meeting you, right, they have the idea in their mind. Don't mean they go do it right. Then they may stretch it out and make you. Wait. You feel what I'm saying. It's

like a game with them. But I believe this. I believe you take a woman out the dinner and she knows for sure. I don't really feel this, dude like that she should pay for own meal at night. You would think you would think women honorable, but that just not. That's not gonna say that she's wrong. Ship. Let me ask you something right now. Still, you're not gonna be honest, but I'm ask you to be honest. Anyway, if you're going to go on vacation with your wife, would take

her while she's on her period? Yeah? Or would you schedule around her administration? But that's my wife. She I'm gonna take her. We're going on vacation, were going on vacation. It wouldn't matter she was on her ministry site or not, because I'm not there just to get some pussy. That's my wife. It's a little different. But if she was my girlfriend, I would definitely get that trip around her site. Thank you. You know it's a difference, though, that's my wife,

you know what I'm saying. Obviously three kyears later and you know, several years of marriage, you know that's that's like that's going to get a cup of coffee together. The Yeah, I've been there, done that, so I'm not going it's more to our relationship than just that act. We actually have good conversation, actually have a lot of fun together. Whence while we've been married, still longe. But if that's my girlfriend, I'm a young nick out there

springing and she said, I'll start my period tomorrow. Can we go get some tampons? Man? Why the fund you didn't tell me that ship before we came out here, because I'm thinking about that's the ultimate actor smashes and and for man the system. You know you're being romantic. You do get the biggest week to king with the

biggest baby. You can test that motherfucker out and jump up down a little bit on it like I'm about to wear some ship out and they like this and they give you the hand, you know how you go to reach it for a girl like this. So maybe maybe it's a street ethnic thing. It's an ethic thing. I mean, you're asking, why does the in a cross section of demographics and the human race, why does the most self and self indulgent and entitled the group of people not feel a need to somehow not be that way.

That's ridiculous. Well, I have a situation, right and I won't say her name. Does this somebody means you both know gen and they gotta show on black effect and everything. So we were talking yesterday and she was telling me that her and her husband had a conversation. Her husband admitted to where he cheated, right, and she was just

trying to understand it. Like I really appreciate her because she was trying to just understand the whole psycholege your men right now, this is a pretty nice looking girl. She not ugly. She was somebody didn't look as good as well, at least in her opinions, and she was ugly, you feel what I mean. So she was telling me, she said, I know men produce all these sperms. You know women have one egg, you know they have one eggs, but men have these nine. I was a sperm. It's

almost like we were just built to breathe. And obviously, as you know what that may be. I think man up until the point the man is thirty years old. Dude, I don't think no man should get married before the age of maybe even nine, because when you were young, the only thing you have in your mind every minute, you notice, every ask if it's if this. You could be in the store with two women and you go notice the ones that got fat asses or look good. You gonna notice the day you die. Though, Yeah, I

think you know what. No, you you calm down, b I think you calmed down at a certain point, and I think you calmed down about trying to get them, but you never stopped noticing. Oh dude, don't know the thing else if you think your wife don't look at ni A you got life worked up. Yeah, But I just think that it's not the same. Like I get it that we would like to make it. People say equal, not exactly the same, But I don't even think we're equal in that regard, or I think any of those things.

I think like particularly your partner, right, Like women always trying to figure out why do men cheat, and I'm telling them it's a personal thing. Like women seem to believe it's about them, like if they're not giving you sex, right, if they're not, they reduce it down to just this physical thing. And I think that's because a lot of men mislead them and make them think that it's just this physical thing, and it's not. It's really like a

personal fulfillment, like a value. Like you get a false sense of value you and I say false, You get a false sense of value by every woman that allows you to sleep with them. You really feel like you have to be some kind of special person for a woman to give you her vadana because of how we put this ridiculous worth on vaginarect g um. A lot of guys that are serial cheaters. I'm talking about dudes and the serial cheaters that just they're not gonna be

loyal to nobody. They used something some low, self esteemed dog, I believe, and they think that them knocking down a bunch of broads invalidates them in some way, and that's not that's not necessarily true. I've had dudes, right, that was my partners, people that I considered friend. And people ask me, how can I consider the type of person a friend? And I'm like, cause I understand what's deficient

about him? Somebody me and you both know. Particularly he felt like if he slept with the same girls I slept with, that makes him as powerful or as valuable, whatever the funk that mean? As I am so like, huh no, because that's the easiest thing. It'd be harder for him to go out and live the life that I've lived. It'd be harder for him to survive selling PCP.

Being a you know, a reputable crypt from seven Street to where you don't have to fight and you have to come up the hard way, you know, street racing and cars going a hundred and fifty sixty miles per hour on the street, all the things that make me me to the general public, to the public in l a right, being a reptable seven Street, being Olivia's son, being a street racer, having a low rider as a teenager, all of this stuff, going to jail, never telling, having

to shoot niggas, having to fight niggas, getting jumped, standing back up, all of the things that make me, me, those are really hard things to sleep with. This broad is the easiest thing. So he's like, okay, that makes me him if I sleep with this broad because that and if you catch what I'm saying, that's the easiest

thing to do out of all of this stuff. It's it's tant amount like from a value standpoint, it's tant amount to seeing like, Okay, you bought a brand new whatever Mercedes as six hundred may Box series off the lot or whatever the hell, and you have a huge, you know, financial empire and all this ship and whatever. You just wouldn't bought it because it was Tuesday. Another guy sees you and buys the same car and thinks, well, I'm at the same level as that guy, and he's

financed the ship out of it and whatever. He just happens to know, my car brand and your car brand are the same, Thus we're the same. You. You get it right here. You spot on me and cheek to make themselves feel good. I tell I told my sisters, I told home girls, I said, you gotta understand it's not about you. But this goes back into that sends me Pe talk about all the time. Accountability. That's the only time they want to be accountable when when they're

being cheated on. Like I've heard women, that's the time, what did I do wrong? That's the only time they're ever blaming their selves for anything in life, or the one the one time out of everything that happens that they shouldn't blame themselves. That's the one time they're gonna blame themselves. What did I do? What? What? What? I wasn't good enough that I didn't give him enough sex, I didn't suck his penis, I didn't do any of these things, you know, blah blah blah. It's like this

is the one time. It's not all the other times it could have been about you. The reason he's staying out late at night without sleeping nobody because you tripping. The reason he's eating this, whatever he's doing, those are your faults. Men. Cheating is never the woman's fault. It's

never the woman's fault. Even like I got a army who who feel like his girl sometimes be stepping out, so when he feels like she's mistreating him, he ago gets them vagina, and I explained to him, like the reason you do that is because you feel bad about her doing it. I don't be tripping. Yes you do. You don't know it, but this is your your repair mechanism to your ego, So you and she may not

be doing it. It may be him. If you ever know this dog motherfucker they cheat, it's always accusing their spouse, so they're significantly doing it doing it. Here's here's the thing though, with that, there's a small intricacy. If it was about her, he would cheat and tell her. He probably doesn't. He keeps it to himself to not get caught because it's about him. And I was trying to tell him because he feels like, well, I don't really

complain to her often about what she's doing. I'm saying you probably need to have it here because what you're doing is still the same thing you're You're you're repairing your ego. By saying you still out value because some other girl wants to suck your penis or give you some vagina. Yeah, you try to balance and no, I'm I'm still in demand in the marketplace, so I'm not antiquated. This is an antiquated dick, dammit, exactly, I'm I'm prime

candidate right now, you feel me. I'm great a b So how men use women, right, is a very unique type of tool. So that's what I'm saying. I don't get how you could think somebody would fly you out of town and the one thing for sure you would have to do, at the bare minimum is give that man some vagina. I mean, in all honesty, you could probably be an ornary, miserable bitch. But if you bust it open at the end of the day and you're

there for three days, give a fuck. Okay, gee, I want to read a few things now, either from so called experts. Right now. This is from a woman that's supposedly an expert. Name she's a PhD. Christine over Street. She's a PhD and supposed to be an expert in this type of manner. Right, Yeah, So what she says, nine of reasons mean cheating relationships. They're looking for a way out is the number one reason? Right, She's wrong? Oh no, not now, this is her right. They're looking

for connection is number two. Number three, they have sociopathic or narcissistic traits. Now that could be possible. That could be possible. No, I don't believe that's a very vague. I think I think number two so far. I agree. Sometimes men do look for connections. Yeah, I do think that. Let's do this. Let's go over each one of these individuals. I want to go into detail. Have a conversation that you said, right. Her name is Dr. Let me go

back at the top. Her name is Dr Christie Overstreet. Okay, Dr okay. So for her number one thing, she says, they're looking for a way out. What she said was this, Sometimes when men cheat is because they are trying to get out of a relationship, and that is the first step. And this has come from my relationship therapist, Kim Paige. Right now, all the people of all genders might do

cheat for this reason. Burgo explains that men may be less likely to have difficult conversations with their partner about their own easy relationship if they're looking for a way out, they may see cheating as a means to the meaning they're sort of done with their marriage or relationship. Instead of having that difficult conversation, they're just having a fair I'm curious if these people aren't even been the relationship.

That's the dumb and should've heard in my life, because that's a woman trying to tell you why a man and you know what's funny, that's the problem. I've noticed something else. Now this could just be me. I've always paid way more attention to women then women pay attention to men. Like that's w I can tell you a bel a mill away like I pay attention to women. Women. See, the reason men don't understand women is because women are

not understandable exactly. There's no logistics to it. It's it's more like it is more emotional and hormonal and fluid, and and and that day. I mean because again always say this, and it's a joke that I hear women get upset about it, but it's true, Like and I wish they would just internalize this and really think about it. You have to be at war with yourself to want

to wear makeup constantly. You get what I'm saying. It sounds crazy because it's such a mainstay in society, right, but if you really think about it, to feel like you need to alter your face, not groom your face, right, Okay, I get it. If you feel like your eyelashes is wild, but you feel like your skin tone is wild, you feel like you don't like your cheek, but they create contract that and and again like my major problem would make up is really two parts foundation and the consiler

like that is the worst. But overall, they are at constant war with themselves. They're always judging themselves. They're always women look in the mirror so much what I'm saying, So it's like they're always at war with themselves. So when women comment on certain things like this, even the doctors, I'm skeptical because they'll let a man lie to them, see me and a lot of women and tell you the truth, like your homies to tell you the woman a lot tell you the truth. Yeah, where you guys

want to go to? Um, let's go to the number two now. And this is real funny to me. They're looking for a connection. I agree with that. No, this is what she says. Despite what gender norms may tell us about men, seeing doesn't always happen for purely physical reasons. If they're feeling unseen or disconnected from their partner, those things hurt and make us go into a zone where

we protect ourselves. And when this happens a lot of the time, the impults to think about sex with other people goes up significantly, and generally speaking, men are much less likely to have a good social support system as far as close male friends. In those instances, the compassionate support from another woman in his life may be very welcome. It often starts the friendship, maybe a woman co worker who starts to make him feel better about himself, and

some of emotional connection forms. She sucked it up because I agree. I think men do cheap for connection. I do sometimes think they do. I don't quite know the connection they're looking for, but I've listened to enough men talk about how somebody else makes them feel. See, I think she's talking about. I think people have affairs for that reason, which a little bit differently just having sex up.

And that's what I think she's talking about. She's not talking about just she she's talking about like white people have affairs. I don't think that's I think that's about that's right important word to to establish the separation between just cheating and having an affair, because I agree, because

it's a difference, you know. I think if a guy feels a connection with somebody, he's going out having coffee with her, he's sneaking off on the movies and stuff, but he's actually in the whole outside relationship, whereas getting some pussy is just transactional. That's the one thing that's a transactional thing to where I'm gonna get this pussy, beat this pussy up for ten fifteen minutes, and if

I kicks you on a rebound and getting cool. If I don't cool, I'm gonna go see my other bitchally think married me and funk up too much with that, especially the one who planned to stay married. I think forgive me for saying this sugar free if you listen to this podcast, I apologize, But I think if you're a married man and you feel like you just need to feel special about yourself and cheating is your goal, you should probably pay a postitute, get your condom, pay

of prostitute. I think that is the smartest decision you can make, because that you have to bust your fucking self. That's a that's the best decision you can make. Either which way, we'll probably a better decision to make them the marriage geez, I'm gonna tell you something as crazy this song, I agree with you, And then my thing is this and this is where this is what I tell people. Right, you have to go through so much

bullshita not getting to where you may as well. If you just need to go do that, man, you might as well make the transactional thing go all the way. It's already a transactional thing kind of. But that's where you go because with most women, unless they're just a stink, they're not used to go let you all the time without doing something, and they're gonna make you bumb something to eat, and that's time time from your wife, that's

someway from your family. I don't so. I do think as a married man, for sure, if you plan the cheat. First off, I don't think no man sleep best with no lady because he's trying to get rid of his lady. He goes like as a man cheating the normal thing that men do feel and them situations they start a fight with the old lady just to lead a house. That's like all women know what you're doing when you

do that, and women do that with men too. I would like to believe that better, but you're probably true. I would just say something like that because I genuinely think women are greater than men. Well, I'm gonna tell you this, bro, You're right, because I'm gonna tell you this. I know most women. If a woman is cheating on you and she don't want to get cut. You will never know, But I genuinely think women really be looking for a way out, trying to find something better. Probably,

so this is I don't think. I don't think men cheat to find something better. I think women cheat to find some better. I'm gonna tell you this, and I think I think I think with the average man, I don't think they're looking for no connection. I don't think they're looking for no way out. I think they're just trying to get them susy. You see somebody and they're trying to recreation. Sure, sure, I can go ahead, go to number three. Okay, number three. They have sociopathic or

narcissistic traits. Agree wholeheartly with this one right here. If a partner has cheated, there could be sociopathic tendencies or narcissist cheats involved. They could be someone who just literally doesn't care about their partner's feelings. They want what they want, and it's just that simple burker lads that often want

an opportunity to cheat presense itself. There are certain people who don't have a good ability to be understanding other people's emotions or the impact of their behead on other people. Narcissistic qualities. Notably, most people have some level of narcissistic behaviors, and not every person with narcissistic behaviors is a full blown narcissist. The same can be said for sociopath a k A antisocial personality. This order, now, I do agree

with that, because I'm gonna tell you this. It's a person that we know and I can't stand this motherfucker. He's a serial cheater. Like serial cheater, don't give a funk either, abody, And he's a narcissistic person. He has these qualities. He only cares about himself, don't give a funk about nobody else. Yeah, and he falls right in line with this. And I'll be honest with you, most

men that I know that a serial cheegers. I'm not talking about the guy that had the one discretion five or six years ago and he regretted and he did it at one time. I never did it again. I'm talking about the motherfucker that is constantly if he meets your wife, he checking her out. You just tell. If he meets Peter's girlfriend, he checking her out. If he meets my wife, keeps checking her out. Let me ask you something, pete, Hm, how far is a narcissist from

like a superbly insecure person? Like, how far is that spectrum a man? That's it depends on the manifestations. It feels like it looks so far that you still end up right next to the most insecure person, like, how far is it from what would what would be the little bit? Uh? It depends to me personally. I think the laziest cheap cop out in amateur psychology is to

defer everything to insecurities. No insecurities if you're genuinely insecure, like legitimately, like you have legitimate insecurities, you know, it's not turning into you being somehow then self righteous where you think you're better than everybody else around you, which is largely what narcissism is, you know what I mean. So, so I think that if we're really talking about insecurities,

it's probably not very close. You can maybe get your insecure an area A, so you want to overcompensate for an area B to try to, you know, balance the equilibrium out in your mind. But if you have like deep seated insecurities about yourself, you're gonna have tremendous like confidence problems, you know, they're those are inherently tied. And narcissists don't have confidence problems, they have confidence surplus problems.

So you don't think that a person has superbly insecure cheats a lot as well, or or I believe so ge what I'm saying, and I'm gonna tell you why, Peter Um, It's almost like most women that sleep with a lot of men have insecurity issues because somebody tells them they pretty. It makes them feel good, they feel desired, and I think that's what the thing. And I think all human beings that the innate desire to be desired.

I think we all want to be desired. You know, this is my point, even with a narcissist, right, So, a narcissist and insecure, because I know two different people that's like that one person. I don't really like that word so much. But let's say I play along with it and believe that that's I've met somebody like that,

because I don't think that's as often as people thinks. Right, but let's say that's a real thing narcissism at that point, right, Um, they cheat because right their their confidence comes from I exist right, like I exist. Like steal situation, you say, somebody a woman with cheat because she doesn't feel beautiful, so she'll go for other guys to feel beautiful. But this is my point. Let me make my point. So a narcissist, right, he cheats because his existence itself is

his confidence. Right. But then let's say a superbly insecure person who don't understand value right when they both talk about why they're the ship, one person is I exist, the other person needs validation through something else. That's what I'm saying. They can end up almost doing the same exact action. I'm not sure, but I'm obviously thought they can end up doing. A superbly insecure person and a narcissist can end up doing the exact same actions, and

the reason they do the actions. The only thing that's different is the validation of the action. To me though, that the question now becomes defined insecure because if you're in if something happens that questions your degree of being self assured about something about you too, where you have to draw action to validate that, then you don't believe in the question that's being brought to you, and you're looking for evidence to the contrary, Whereas if you believe

it and you're genuinely insecure, you're bought in. You're not gonna be out there trying to convince yourself Otherwise you're gonna be trying to deal with demons. Whatever I said, we gotta talk about that, We gotta we gotta get Dr. We gotta get Dr Crazy Lady on here to really have a conversation about it. The last time we had a doctor on the episode, we couldn't even air it exactly where you know, one thing before I go on the number four, I think it comes down to this, man.

I think people want to feel validated. People have insecurities, and people have desires, and I think it could go as deep as people in society. Sometimes people turn into what society dictates they should be. They may have family members, like do you know how many gay men there are in the relationships that are just in relationships because they want to satisfy their parents, their friends. They don't want to, you know, they don't want to they don't want to

be themselves. So a lot of people, and then you've got some people that are just super kinky. You may have a dude that may have a desire that's so kinky, he may not feel comfortable coming to his wifehood, right, Like, it's a lot of rappers off their g Like. You know, I've seen a couple of tapes where there's some of these rappers that like getting playing with toys. And I'm not talking about what they women. You see what I'm saying, So you know that's well, I'm not watching them. You

gotta remember the line of works about me. You see the video. But the um the thing is, there are a lot of people that have different desires, I believe, right, But let me go on the number four because I'm not an expert on this number four. It revenge cheating. Some people act out and cheat out of anger, jealousy, or a desire for her hand down. I think this is true even if their partner hasn't cheated on them, if they've done something to upset their partner, for example,

having a close friendship with another man. Burkel office an example, they will end up cheating to make a point, he says. And I'm gonna tell you this. Women are so evil. If they want to be caught, they'll leave your little clues just to catch you, just to bust your ass off. I'm gonna tell you. I had a friend that was in the military, right, he's always cheating, always cheating, broke his wife hard multiple times. You know what his wife

did him. She knew when he was coming home, and she would usually have a dinner prepared for him and have a little party or whatever. You know what. She made sure this motherfucker saw her doing sucking a dick. He walked in the house and she heard that. She had to hear this man pull up in their dride for the house ain't number this big. You know how those marriage bass are. She was on the cock sucking

the dudes that she wanted him to see that. But so that that's my point, that's that's that's more the clues, you know. But that's what I'm saying. She wanted to hurt him, She wanted to see And this is why I'm saying, because you'll have people telling each other that they're doing revenge porn or excuse me, revenge revenge cheating, right, but you're not getting caught at that point. It's not revenge cheating. Revenge requires the other person to be affected.

And that's what I was telling my homie that you know, we think it's all let shop toppy cheating and he cheat and he thinks it's revenge. I'm like, no revenge would be if you let her see it, or you let her find out you cheating. But if you're still defending it, it's only to to stroke your ego and

repair what you feel like what's fractured. I'm gonna tell you this, at this point in my life, man, where I'm at with everything, if I ever found out my wife was seating leaving, and she would probably leave me too, I'm not gonna waste no time. I'm too old for that ship, Like I'm too old to go to the whole thing and giving her and then being worried every time she goes somewhere she up working with this guy. I would just leave him. I just think that's the

best result. Like if and I believe if I did something to her, she would have being up with from her right and leaving me to wait. But what you pay for her flight home? I wouldn't do. I wouldn't pay for sho. I would try to ruin her age, shed some wrong to me, tho I would try to ruin it. I'm just being real I'm not mad at that, do that like all the all the great year, go out all like a snitch, all that ship because love is my thing? Is this g I had my opportunities

and I not and I haven't done anything wrong. So you mean to tell them you can't resist Hector or or Anthony or whoever the funk he was at your job, that you fucking win. You did that to me, funk that ship. They don't know. I'm gonna make her as start and I'm gonna try to take the house. I'm gonna try to leave her as busted, every person, every boat getting cut up and burned up, every piece of Oh, I'm taking that ship with me, all that ship. I'm

snacking the ring off the finger and everything. Damn fantastic everything, Go to the next one, all right, number five? Now this is this, I don't know. They're struggling with substance abuse. If one partner is dealing with a substance abuse problem, instances of cheating may become much more likely. When we become addicted like that. It creates an impost driven, more immature version of ourselves. Nothing that has nothing that he's seen.

Many relationships fall apart after noting that he's seen many relationships for all apart after one partner become addictive pain killers after the surgery, for example, Um, I think that's very rare. Who knows. I have no idea, And the choice of pain killers after surgery was very odd because I would imagine that she would be more of a like social kind of whatever drug use or whatever than just someone who's laid up in fake back pain on you know whatever for ten years. Now this one number six,

I can feel this. They're struggling with their mental health. Similarly, Paig says depression and anxiety can also increase that imposed driven behavior because if depression and anxiety are intense, it can really excaporate the need to get read, read, read it again, Okay. Similarly, Paig says depression and anxiety can also increase that impulse driven behavior because if depression and anxiety are intense, it can really exacerbate the need to get relief, and relief often can come in the form

of someone really attractive outside of the relationship. Yeah depression. Yeah, again, that just goes into vagina being kind of this like fix it all, this fix it all solution. Like vagina is like just like the last one with alcohol or drug. Same thing, like vagina becomes a fix it all. It's a temporary patch on it. Like men get vagina when they depressed, Me get vagina to celebrate. Vagina is like the all around go to tool for instant boost. It's

just all off. That's a positive chemical release in the brain. It is because I can you know what, I think some people are better than others, man, But I don't think nobody can never say they necessarily had some bad puss. Yeah I have, you know what. I think. It's this broad thing. Some puss is better than others, But I don't know. I've had bad you have, you know? Yeah, I can see that for the second time we go going to number seven. They're seeking validation number one. That

should be number one. These are actually the same thing over and over, and this is what they say. Feelings of insecurity and low self esteem can also drive someone that. When you said that, particularly if they're not getting that validation in their own relationship. If people don't feel attractive enough to their partner, they make cheat to look for external validation. Like you said that, he is that sexual issue.

Sex is erected out dysfunction can also someone to look with someone newhere and more exciting to prove to themselves that they're still sexually quote and capable. Now, well, if it works, then that then we've determined that the you know,

dependent variable is the woman. Yeah exactly. So my thing is this, if you can have these erected out this function problems, like like, let's say you've been going through like, man, my dick ain't got hard in two years, but you're walking to the grocery store and see you old thick, thick as girl walking to that and all of a sudden already already jumped up like this, Then you know,

man ship problem made me. I agree, you know what I mean, It's like, thank God I don't have them issues, but I can see that being a one and and I think that when it comes down to it, though, some people are just addicuative, because some girls are just addictive big no matter how much pipe you're giving you the fund them every day, they still will get as much as dick as they can. It's just someone like that. There are women that have went into porn because they

can't satisfy the urge they have a sexual appetite. This for racious. They want to have sex every five minutes, whether they're on the period or not. Do you believe that though, Oh yeah, I've seen it before. Yeah, but porn stars don't funk all the time. That's no they've done. But there are Yeah, but there have been. I talked to a porn star before they got into poorn just to satisfy their racious sexual appetite. I was talking to Ryan Jeremy as a matter of fact, when we're in

the CBS building. Yeah, so I interviewed round Jeremy. Then if you got lost piste off about that. They got it just got sucked up. I don't know what happened. They just sounded like a bunch of digital noise. Right. But Ryan Jeremy was actually a who teacher when he was the born. He wasn't He didn't fit the normal profile of the person entering form. Usually people are entered foreign they've been abused when they were younger, they have something going on psycholzely that kind of drove them to

that path. Right. He defied all that. He was a school teacher, came from a good family, and he just liked sex. So he said, man, I can get his much because he as I want to he had a sexual addiction, because that's what he we wounded up going examed for every woman he met. He thought he could suck it. I'm gonna tell you a story about Ryan Jeremy. Dog. Ryan Jeremy meets fans right all the time. Right, There's a guy that met him and that's how he got

his manager. Right, he met this guy, right, guy was a fan and Ryan said hey. You know he was like, hey, man, well you know we got the time with party and you know in the room if you want to come back, come back. So Ryan, they get a knock on the door. It's Ryan Jeremy. Oh ship, they got beers there. His his like, um, his place, sister is there, his wife is there, and the other girl's mom. Now this is

a real story, right, they've run out of beer. He says, I'll running the seven eleven around the corner and go grabingother twelve. Fact he comes back, Royan is sucking all three of the girls in the room. Like, got a mall spread faced down, ass up on the bed and he's sucking all three of these bases. That's Ryan jarreny dog. He's used to getting the weightless stuff like that, because people when they meet him want to give him some possy because it's a fantasy. It is, so he's people's lives.

He's fucking nuns like people that you wouldn't think that he's he's fucking story. This is just like because he's used to being able to get trimmed whenever he's goings to. So every woman he meets, he thinks on that ship. So that's what happened. He's raped women before in that process of thinking that, oh they would they wanted you know. Yeah,

So I think he was a sexual DV. And I think he was and I don't know if dving is the right word dog when he was the person that was a dicky say, yeah, he was the person that was a digital sex And I don't know if these are written in order of importance, but I think this damn sure it should have been the number one reason. Uh number eight. And I said this before. They're denying part of their their identity. In some case, they're denying

a part of that. They're denying their identity. In some cases, cheating can be the result of one partner denying their own sexual or gender identity. Someone may be struggling with a seven. Yeah, yeah, this is deep and they want to experiment, they want to explore. This could also be true with gender identity issues, and you're desire to explore sex as well as identity around that because it's a hidden part of yourself. Yeah, that's correct. That that's deep

right there, that's deep right there. It's but it's substantial, you know. Number nine, they are emotionally immature. Lastly, Burglar Pigs both agree that many of these reasons fall under the category of emotional immaturity. I think that's at the core of what Nan cheap, noting that men are taught not to talk about their emotions. By the time a man has an affair, there's already been a long period of time when they have had issues, and they have

been an inability to talk about those feelings. According to Page, it often comes down to simply for a judgment like a wheel power, lack of self control, and immaturity. I agree with that too to a certain Yeah, it's it's also to me just like that's kind of a vague offloading of responsibility, the same way that somebody had too many numbers and just gave you an extra number Yeah, And it's the same as like the insecurity thing. It's

like if you can tie anything to it. It really doesn't have a great definition in and of itself, but you can fit a lot of odd shaped items into that box, you know what I mean. And then they have a reason to end signs. Your partner maybe cheat. And I hate ship like this because women going to read this bullshit. And if you take your phone in the bathroom with you, why do you take your phone in the bathroom with you? Because I'm sitting on the toilet taking the ship and I'd like to look at

the TV or like I'd like to read ship. I may be talking to homie'll may be talking to Glass as I may be talking to you. It doesn't mean I'm taking the phone in their show me in this podcastle let us hear this so we could actually thumbs up and thumbs down this okay. Number one. They're more withdrawn, more closed off, and are more emotionally disconnected. Let's see that posible. Well, that's what I'm saying, because you can become with drawn because you just got to move the

fun with people. You don't feel like being bothered everye more. You having personal problems about success. Thing't happen at work or something whatever. Okay, Number two, you notice significant changes and the way they do things, for example, their schedule or their general be gate. I think that's kind of I think that's kind of generalizing. And ship say that again. You notice significant changes in the way they do things, their schedule or their behavior, and that's women in general too.

They come up with that. Maybe I'll go for that. You can tell the woman wrote this ship for sure. Yeah, women give I'll tell you another thing. Women give women the worst advice ever. They do all the time. And I'm gonna tell you I talked about that involved thought but whatever. Yeah. So yeah, for real, you bring up a particular person or instance that seems fishing, and they get very defensive, or in other cases they're very vague and dismissive about Agree with that one more time. Yeah, yeah,

I mean on the defensive ship. Yeah, when you bring up a particular person or instance they seems real fishing, they get very defensive or in other cases they're very vague and dismissive about it. Yeah, you don't give it up or you'll be tripping. Like when you choose me to cheat her. You know what, though a woman was getting mad because a woman was I'm gonna tell you this has happened to me before. I've been the car not paying attention to nothing. My wife could see a

girl way across down somewhere while were you looking at her? Especially? You know, not something much however before and I'll be like, I don't know what the hell are you talking about? Who? I know he was looking at him, And it's kind of like, you know, but number five, they're certainly putting more effort into their appearance. Perhaps the four workers we're going out that too. I believe that too, because that's actually the best one so far. Let me see number six.

They seem super enthusiastic about another person. Maybe I yeah, that's that's true, you know what? Yeah, yeah, you know what the indicator like because I got cheated on before, and you know how I knew it was happening. The girls phraseology and her sentences changed, and I'm like, you hanging around someone and you like him, so you're talking how they talk like you usually wouldn't say around the corner. You'd say the other side of the block or so

something arbitrary like that. But like I picked up on. I said, you don't say ship like that, like where you Why are you saying you like that? Now? One the thing is Pete Peter. Every man is not as observing as you. I would observe something like that, You know, I would know. I would like to think I would know if I was betting, cheated on, because I've been around my wife is so long, you know. And and plus he's the person of habit. She's a creature of habit.

She pretty much does the same thing, same way all the time, you know, So I would definitely I would definitely know. Yeah, you could tell when something significantly influential it's happening to someone that's that close to you. If not, then that relationship probably not gonna be very successful anyway. All right, now, this is some bullshit right here. This is the ship to get a motherfucking trouble. All of a sudden, your partner seems extra nice, as if they're

trying to make up for something. So if I decided just to be nice with my wife, can take her out to dinner when you get home, I could be accused of cheating trying to do some good ship. You know what I'm actually going to agree where her whoever wrote that, I'm going to agree, that's a bullshit that you be extra nice you got away with some ship, or you think you got away with some ship, or it's a possibility you could have got away with some ship and you just do it to one. Extra nice

is not taking your grad at dinner. But if you if you never take it to dinner, Yeah, I might agree. That's the second good point, all right. Number nine, they're not accountable for where they're spending their time and in some cases their money, big chunks of time when they don't want to talk about what they were doing. No,

hell no, that's just done. I hate when they do dead no, you know, And I think that's again just another generalization because me and you both in the business gether where we might get a nice chunk of money, right, and we may spend sixty send that money back in the business. We may dump that money back in the business where there's upgrading equipment or at least in the spot.

You feel what I'm saying. Sometimes, like I told Laria one day, because she was expecting me to account to her for all the money in my business, and I said, the only money I need to be accountable to you for is the profit is part of the profit that is ours because I don't look at money is just being mine hers. This is ours, right, That's the only thing I need to be accountable to Before. What I spend on my business ain't really none of your business.

You wouldn't understand it if I told you, because if she had her way, I wouldn't spend money on ship. But give it the earth. I'm with you. I hear what you're saying. Okay, now this is a good one right here. Okay. Number teen, and first, they seem more irritated by your judgment of living in an ongoing way. I believe that. I believe when a woman is or somebody is cheating on somebody, they start looking at the deficiencies in their spouse and started species. You start comparing.

I literally was just talking to somebody about this. You start comparing your old lady to other women, m somebody that's right there? Yeah, and it is. Yeah. It do be with bias too, yep. And this is number eleven. There's been a strong downgrading of sexual interests. They maybe have more difficulty getting and or maintaining and direction as

well as orgasmic. That's just obvious. If you went there and you usually putting me in work, and you can the whip new to when you came busting that dog, that's probably a sign that you've been out doing your things. It could be your health health rated thing in sex pell you like your your health is connected. And this all mental too, bro. I'm gonna tell you this. Sex is all in the here. And these lists like this list are all cuts and maybes and mites. They're not

If this is then that's for sure. Blank. There's just like if this is, it might be blank. No. Remember twelve is just so basically just expected. And of course physical evidence like emails and ticks left golden and hearing condoms under the battle or condoms in the wallet. It's like, dude, at this point in my life, dog, I'm fifty two years old. If I'm walking around with some rubbers, Maria got to write the bust me in here with a

rolling pin. You see what I'm saying that that's because obvious right there, because I can't say, oh, well, I'm using for us. Maybe they ares, you know, no ship going for that ship okay. And the last thing they say what to do about infidelity in a relationship. I don't even want to talk about this. We're not gonna do this, you know what. I don't even wanna talk about this subject. This motherfucker podcast, though it's over, it's over,

is just depressing and listening towards right. Yeah, don't pitch you off door, because this is the ship you get. You the arguments with your wife and bought it. You ain't did the damn thing wrong. Good looking out for tuning into the No Sellers Podcast. Please do us a favorite, subscribe, rate, comment, and share. This episode was recorded right here on the West coast of the USA and produced by my homeboy A King for the Black Effect Podcast Network and I Heart Radio. Yeah.