Episode 18 - Secrets to Success: From Training to Transformation

I love your hair.

Thank you. Well, it's 'cause it's St. Patty's Day.

Uh, it's brilliant.

It's St. Patty's Day, so, so today we're talking from the other side of the world. Well, one of us is.

Well, no, we're both talking from the other side of the world. It's all a matter of perspective, Tina. Depends on where you are.

Yes.

So I'm talking from Epsom in Surrey and not in a car park. Um,

makes a change.

Makes a change. Yeah. And some people are gonna wonder what that means if they've not been watching any of the videos. And where are you Tina?

I am in the Sunshine State. I'm in Orlando, Florida with Dr. Richard Bandler and the wonderful of ours on their spring trainings, helping out.

Oh,

as usual.

Fabulous. Yeah.

Yeah, I was here in March, 2020 when the Great Pause began. Uh, had our flights canceled, had a difficulty getting home. It was very exciting. And here we are two years later and it's like nothing's happened. You know, nobody's wearing masks. The sun is shining. Uh, I show you, but if I open the curtains, um, you won't be able to see anything. Yeah. So, I mean, my hotel room, it's,

hasn't that

two quite close to be

just flown by?

Strangely, yes. Although, while you were in it, it didn't feel like it had flown by, did it?

Mm, no. I suppose not. Yeah. Yeah. There's a very much a time distortion. Yeah. In the moment. It was slow time down. But when I look back over the last two years, well, it's gone very quickly. There's been a lot happened.

Yes, there has. Yeah. I mean, all those things that we thought about doing a decade ago are coming into fruition.

Uh, what do you mean In terms of what we're doing? Us personally?

Yeah. In terms of what we're doing personally. Technically

with the business? Yeah,

yeah, with the business. Yeah. I mean, we talked about stuff 10 years ago that we didn't have the technology to really put it together and do it. Mm-hmm. And then we didn't have the time, and then suddenly we had both.

And no, we've got time and the technology, technology kind of just holding together with duct tape and, and, but you know, you do realize there's, there's a massive solar flare going on at the moment, isn't there as well? That's, um, affecting things. And my partner Maggie, was doing a YouTube, uh, an interview with somebody yesterday and on four occasions never happened before. They both had to stop because the connection was so bad and just reconnect.

we've had tornadoes, we've had tornado warnings, um, severe weather warnings. Yeah, people have lost houses. Buildings have disappeared. Yeah. Luckily the hotel we're in is apparently the safest in Orlando, and it was specifically built to withstand tornadoes and hurricanes.

Fabulous. What you need, how, how reassuring. Okay. Oh, reassuring. I'm just closing, I'm just closing a few things down. I've got a few things popping up on my screen.

I remember.

And so you're in,

I'm sorry. I remember we were here about, oh, about 15 years ago. Um, and a really bad storm came through and there was a moment when we were actually in the eye of the storm and we went out in the car park and it was bizarre because it was perfectly quiet and still where we were and around us. You could actually see the storm.

That's amazing. I've had that experience once. That was in Florida as well. It was, when was the OJ Simpson thing going on? I can't remember now, but everyone was intrigued in that. So it was around about the same time and it was deathly quiet like the, in fact, I'll tell you what it was, it was like lockdown because you, it's like there's no traffic, isn't it? Still? And there was just the quietness that around you was it? If you can keep your head while all around you are losing theirs

Kipling.

Yeah. Maybe you haven't got a clue what's going on.

Yeah, I remember when,

that's my version of

it. Course in, in 2020, we were in this room, in the hotel and outside. You have international drive. 24 7 is just full of traffic and people. Yeah. And I looked out the window and there was nothing, there were no people, there was no traffic. And I thought, well it's either the zombie, a apocalypse or the TRTs are coming.

Well, TRTs, depending upon out your age really zombies. Anyone un under 30. Yeah,

anyone under 30. Anyone else? So, so what's the know what TRTs are?

So I'm just curious. So what's the vibe? Is it, is everyone kind of like business is normal?

everybody is so excited to be here, to be back in the training environment. Richard is on fire. It's like he's been sent to his room for two years and he's come out like boom. Uh, he's absolutely amazing. John and Kathleen, as always, the seminars are going really well. Um, there's normally. A lot of Brits here for these seminars. There, there isn't this time round. Uh, in fact, there's just one Brit in the trainers training at the moment. Um, and is

that just because of the logistics, you know, the uncertainty of travel, you

think Maybe, maybe we've got like

Yeah,

25 Germans have come. How group of Germans have come? Um, we've got,

well, well, maybe, maybe the Brits are just coming on our practitioners. Maybe that's what it's That would be nice. Yeah. They're not coming, we're not doing DHE, we're not doing NHR. Maybe they're just sort of, uh, holding on and coming, coming to ours.

They're waiting to come and see us in London. Yeah,

yeah, yeah,

yeah. But we had, uh, we've got a load of people from Malaysia here that are, and, and from Israel that have come for the trainers training and obviously from South America, from the US, Canada.

It's interesting because, you know, I, I remember it was, it was Jonathan Alfield. Do you remember? Jonathan Alfield came to, in fact, it wasn't our practice group, this was just before we set up the practice group in, was it 2004? So it was in 2002, I think at Bed Bedford House. Where was it? Phil Holt. Yeah, Phil Holt used to run, it was Phil Holt Run Practice Group. Yeah. Yeah. And one of his guest trainers was Jonathan Orfield.

Yeah.

Yeah. Um, almost like a bit of a leverage. Well, you could, yeah. It was a bit, bit of sarcasm to that. Yeah. Kind of took somebody into, uh, down, down through the motor operators and flipped them. So it's like, really? You're telling me I can't, and it was a great simple exercise, but what was in, he commented about Wow, NLP has really taken off in the uk.

I think NLP is very, very, uh, very large in Germany, Italy, uh, south, a lot of South American countries as well as, uh. And in Jae, uh, Japan, Japanese in Japan, there's normally a huge group of Japanese people come. Mm-hmm. Every spring and summer here to do trainers training where they've done their prac and master prac in Japan. This time they're not traveling because of COVID.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Okay. So maybe there's just no real patterns. It's just It is what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe it's just my wishful thinking that NLP for the world, people are finding, you know, around the world, they're finding out about it and finding how useful it can be. Um. So I just wanna say hello to anyone that's on, on with us. I mean, I don't know. I haven't checked.

We do

have

some questions. I'm just looking, we, we do have some people looking at us. Nobody's put any comments in yet. Um, oh, sorry. Somebody's trying to ring me.

That's Richard. Yeah. Richard, where are you? You're on stage next. Get on, get down there.

No, no, no, no, no. I've got things to do. Okay. So I'm gonna start with a question for you. Okay?

Oh, great. Okay.

Fabulous. Growing your practice products. Design your bestseller.

Mm-hmm.

So here you go. Apparently this month's question she says is, have you really made the best of your product? Really got her thinking, especially when you said people don't care about NLP.

Mm-hmm.

Uh, so on that note, I'm now a work in progress. Following up the learnings from your timeline session, bearing in mind that people don't care about NLP, what process did you go through to decide what to call yourself and ensure that people succinctly know what you do?

Okay, so there's a, there's quite a lot

Mm-hmm.

So I wanted to say they would catch people's attention because writing a book, as much as it's useful for building authority and building an audience, going into the detail of signing up your clients when they're contacting you, is an area which I've seen so many people kind of skim over.

Yeah.

So it's like they concentrate on like, um, I've got my terms and my conditions. Yeah. Done that. Spent 20 minutes on that. Um, I've got my consent form. Yeah. I spent another 10 minutes on that. But there's a whole process at the very beginning when, so imagine that you've done all this work contacting people, getting their attention, um, building up an audience, and they come to you. Have you done the best job designed your bestseller in this case, the, the bestseller is your coaching. Okay?

Yeah.

So have you really designed it to make sure that any calls that you get get converted if they're right for you? By the way, not just every call, but anyone who's a good fit comes in to see you and goes out being a raving client. And what I mean by a raving client, they're just not a lunatic, but a raving advocate for you. You know, you go, oh my gosh, that was amazing. I've gotta go and tell everybody. So it's about taking a little bit of time.

Yeah.

And then we looked at the, so it's like the, the pre and the post processes for, um, uh, your bestseller, which is your, your coaching session. Yeah. Yeah. So that's the preframe, that's what we did. And we did two timelines. One, as the client.

Mm-hmm.

So what would have to be there for them to have a smooth journey? So like, what would an ideal journey be? Would it be if they're ringing Oh, someone actually takes the call. How about that as the concept? Well,

yeah, yeah.

Or if they're emailing, um, someone gets back to them in a good time and follows up. Yeah. Or schedules a time, you know, what has to be there to make sure there's, they're not having to work unduly, there's no delays. They don't, they don't get lost in the process. Yeah. And then what has to be there from your perspective? Uh, have you done your best? Have you really designed this to be of service to someone to make it, you know, smooth and as easy for you and, and, and for them?

No. They

don't. What they're, what they're interested in is what, what can you do for them?

Yeah. They want the result. They don't care how you do it. They don't care whether you're gonna use NLP or any other process specifically.

Yeah.

They just want the result. They want.

Yeah. And, um, so, so that's, that was the question that obviously must have Yeah. Touched a nerve with them. And actually, I think it was a, it's a, it's a point that, um, became very, very. It became very clear to me, it was probably about 10 years ago, that a lot of people, especially in coaching, um, they get so bogged down with what it is that they're doing and really do forget about what, um, what's it doing for the client. Yeah. You know, they talk about being a hypnotherapist, who cares?

Yeah. I think people get, one of the thing mistakes, people making sales is they got bogged down with how wonderful, wonderful their product is. You need my product, my product can do this, this, this, this, and this. They don't actually consider what does the client need? They're not being of service, they're not solving a problem. The minute you can get out there and explain how you can solve a problem that somebody has, then they'll become really interested in what you've got to offer.

Yeah, absolutely. And it's the basis of being of service to people's sales, building a relationship and go, you know, I, I distinguish like marketing. And sales marketing is woohoo. Hello sales is, and how may I serve you?

Yeah.

How may I be of service to you? And so at no point it's going, look, this is what I do. This is what I do, this is what I do, this is what I've got this, it's about it being really curious. How, how may I serve you? You know, what do you mean what's your problem? What do you need? Yeah. Well, what do you want and what do you need? And really, we always wanna make sure we match what they want, because quite often people don't even know what they need. We might know what they need.

Yeah.

But we could be out of rapport by pushing what we need, what we know they need, rather than delivering what they want and then leading them into what, what's needed. So the last part of the question, you know, what, what do I do? It, it kind of depends really. Yeah. I, I, so it, it depends on which, which hat I've got on in terms of which, um, part of my business I'm working on. So the, uh, let's say, let's give you a specific really. Um, okay. So with my corporate clients now I'm very specific.

Uhhuh.

Okay. Now it doesn't mean they're all builders at all. No. Some of them are like, um, from repair companies, some of them landscape garden design, um, interior fittings. So there's a range of them. They're all of a sudden age and an aspiration, which is, they're not there yet. Wherever there is.

Well, there's always more. Yeah. There's always,

there's always more

learn more, so, yeah.

Yeah. So these, so most people go, I know I can be, do, have, give more. There's always more, but they, they're getting to an age where it's, feels like the clock is ticking.

Yeah.

And going even quicker. So there's like this desperate need to create and turn their business into what they know it could be and should be. And they want it to be, and it ought to be. Okay. So I take that desperate need and go, okay, so let's build your business to sell, even if you don't want to. Okay. Because if we build the business to sell, then it's working. It's, it's not never gonna be as optimal, best 'cause it can always be better, but it's gonna be streamlined.

Yeah.

Yeah. What I call myself is irrelevant. Yeah. It's as long as I can get that idea across that, you know, and, and that they can see that and really understand the values and the importance of that. I can give it a name of any sort. I actually think the strap lines of what we do is more important. Yeah,

yeah. I

agree. Because the, the name catches attention. The strap line goes, I get where you're at. I understand where your needs are, maybe even more than you do. Yeah. And are you interested in having a conversation about this? Yeah, about, so in answer to the person's question, what do I call myself? Well, I, I, so it's the quantum growth coach because I want people to grow in, in quantum leaps and, you know, so it's like small changes, exponential results, but that's just a name.

Yeah.

So you never have to sell, you kind of just take the orders. Yeah. Um, so looping back to the question, designing your best seller. What do you call yourself? Don't get bogged down with the catchy bestseller title almost, because it's kind of like that, isn't it? Yeah. It's like bestseller title. It's grab their attention, strap line meets some need. Yeah. Uh, and then expand upon it just a little bit more. And if you get those three right, um, people will know what you can do for them.

it is. I mean, in all the, the years we've been in business, um, nobody's ever asked to see my insurance. Nobody's ever asked to see my certificates or my qualifications. They've only really been interested in what I can do for them. Yeah. I have this problem. How can you help me?

Mm-hmm.

And I think that that's the thing. Look at sales.

Yeah. And that's the thing is that's one of the biggest shifts that people can get. It's like really being sincerely from a place of service.

Yeah.

Yeah. Am I doing the, the, a good enough job to deliver my service to help these people? And I'm not talking about, you know, faking the sincerity. Was it Tony Bins said, you know, fake sincerity, you got it made, which I thought was really funny. If you can fake sincerity, you've got it made. Um, it's sincerely wanting to do the best for that person. And really, I know you and I have similar views on the word empathy. I think empathy's a bit overrated in terms of a tool for working with people.

It can,

but it's, I think it's essential. That's what that timeline exercise is about. It was about having the empathy for the person who's in a desperate need. And have you done everything within your power to make sure that their journey. To come and see you is as smooth and as easy and as, um, effortless as possible. So they turn up in an, in the best state they can be. So you can do an amazing piece of work.

Yeah,

you your best fan, Raven fan. And that all comes from, it can, if it's self-serving, it doesn't work. It's gotta be really from place of service. You know, how can I make this the best, best service, you know? Unless that's been the theme all the way through, isn't it? We start, I started off with preeminence almost a year ago, you know, being great at what you do.

I think that that's, that's a piece that a lot of

Yeah. But totally. Uh, so actually there's a couple of things I wanna talk about that. Um, it just occurred to me, I think a lot of people with their training, training can make people problem focused.

Yes.

Prob Yeah. And, and technique focused. So problem and technique centric rather than solution and human focused.

Yeah.

Yeah. Really thinking about the person that's in the room and how, you know, what, what is the best solution for them. And I think there's com two completely different feelings that come with those. Yeah,

there are. Yeah. It's, it's, and, and I think people are looking at, well, I mean, we've got a question here. Air, um, that's been asked where somebody's asking, oh, oh, that's interesting. How did I do that? Uh, somebody's asking, um, about a client where their, their partner hordes.

Mm-hmm.

Um. And you know what, what, what are the kind of things that I would do with somebody with a hoarding issue? Well, that would depend on what the hoarding is really about. Uh, I mean, I know some people that hoard memorabilia from things that are really important to them because that's all they have in their life. And it's not about stopping them from holding.

Yeah. Yeah. And to, to help someone like that. You've just gotta be infinitely curious, haven't you? Yeah. Yeah. And, and so again, looping back to, to Eric. Yeah. Again, I'm, I'm really excited. I mean, you know Eric better than I do. We've met just on a couple of occasions in the back of the train room. So, um, so I'm really excited to, you know, get a chance to work with him and meet him a little bit more.

It is

fine tuning.

Yeah.

And distinctions and fine tuning require. No, I, this is my view. It's not always about an innate skill. Yeah. Somebody can see something the others can't. Well, they're doing, maybe they're doing something that's different. It's about sharpening, whatever that skill is.

Yeah.

Maybe quieting down all the noise so you can actually hear the signal. Yeah. Or notice the subtleties that is there for everyone to see. So it's about putting the work in to, to be able to get these distinctions and then, well, what do you do with that? With that? Well, that's what you find out in the, in the session, isn't it?

It is.

You go, oh, I just noticed this person's saying something or doing something. What am I gonna do with that? Well, you can't do any of that if you're working from scripts or you're working from a technique number by number process. Can you? Yeah. Yeah. So you know, a lot of the things we answer here. Um, and I was think about this last week actually during these q and a sessions. Um, we can only give you, like, point you in the right direction. Um, we can't give you the solutions.

Yeah, it's, um, there, there are in so many different situations and things that can come into, um, a session. I mean, there's, there's, there's a question here that was handed today, um, about working with somebody with trauma. Um, due to my, my. Explaining about my client who came to see me that had eczema, psoriasis, and, and had suffered trauma when I got rid of the trauma, skin condition improved.

Mm-hmm.

Uh, and this is somebody that is already practicing, um, as a therapist and they've said, so what would you do if there was a pending court case? Mm-hmm. Um, now clinically people are taught, there are situations whereby if you use hypnosis to help somebody get rid of trauma, it can affect any pending court case.

Mm-hmm.

Because the judge, um, will not be happy if they find out that the, the witness, the, the, the person that is the victim has actually been hypnotized.

Yeah.

cause there is still that belief surrounding the fact that. If you work with somebody who is suffering trauma and they're going to court as a victim, that you, the all powerful hypnotist could have put that information in there.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

And yet people aren't taught this, are they?

No. Well, they're not. Well, they are, if they depends on what training they get.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, but you both, you and I have had, um, you know, a lot of in-depth training that hypnosis and psychotherapy. Um,

yeah.

And yeah, you do learn these things.

Yeah.

Yeah. Something like that will be, you know, wait till the court case is over. Yeah. Because there is a possibility. But even that is, is um, it's not wring law. It's just best practice.

That's right. It's, it's not illegal to hypnotize somebody who's, who's got a pending court case. Uh, it is best practice because if you do hypnotize them and they go to court and it comes out in court, it can make their case null and void.

Yeah. So actually I think those, those are great questions because they're questions that people, you know, those points have never been raised during that person's training. Possibly.

No.

no.

So there will be gaps. That's why they're asking the question, isn't it? I don't know. The ain't going on. What do you think? I

think it's a fa I think it's a fabulous question.

yeah,

yeah.

It's because these are things that people don't tend to think about, um, when they have their courses. Uh, and, and as you've said, you and I have both had in-depth training, so

mm-hmm.

We've learned about all the little, little nuances of things to do. Um, and I think it's important that people are taught this.

Yeah. Uh, and also treat, there's an element of like coaching.

yeah.

There still weren't many coaches around. We talk about 18 years ago. It was still, coaching was still kind of a new thing. Yeah. Um, hypnosis, there were more, I think there were more hypnotherapist around then. That's, that was my understanding of it. Yeah. Um, but in the last 10 years, I mean, you can't move without bumping into a coach, can you? You

know? No.

No, you can't. Um, the quality and the depth of the coaching experience and training people get, uh, I dunno. It varies, doesn't it? So I'm not commenting on that, but I, we are talking about working with people to change their lives, change their beliefs. Yeah. Change their behaviors. It's, I think there's an element of, it can be made to seem look really e and look really easy and simple and quick.

And it can be

And it can

be, yeah. Can be

when you know what you're doing. Yeah.

Yeah.

And be able to then learn from it and apply it and how most people aren't willing to do that work. So they'll go on a coaching course, they'll go on a, maybe even a hypnotherapy course. You're only just beginning.

Yeah.

Yeah. The, the real work is getting in there, working with people and finding all these little nuances. Yeah. And constantly, constantly learning. Um, so I think there's an element of one, seeing people that are really good at what they do, but they put in the decades and they make it look easy. Yeah. And a lot of people think they just can go do a course, even if it's a 10 day course or a 14 day course, or even some people do a three day course and suddenly they've got,

they do

a piece of paper and they're out there. Um, and they won't know these nuances.

Mm.

You know, they won't know these nuances. So, you know, that's why we do this, isn't it? You know?

Yeah. It, it, yeah. It, it's, I think it's also important. That. I mean, so with within, like something like clinical hypnotherapy, if you join some of the big associations, like the courses we do Yeah. Are accredited by the, the general hypnotherapy council. They want all their hypnotherapist to have supervision.

Mm-hmm.

To meet with a, a peer once a month to discuss clients, their experiences and what's happening. And I think that's invaluable to have somebody to, to sit down and chew the cud over what's happening within your practice, the successes you've had, maybe to get somebody with a little bit more experience that can give you suggestions as to what you can do.

Yeah. Yeah. And we all have blind spots. It doesn't matter how much work we do. Yeah. There's anyone that's gonna know the whole, all the scripts, um.

Yeah.

So what else have we got Tina?

So, so, so this month for those of you in the, in the, the Secret Agent of Change membership, I talked about how you could use NLP and hypnosis to help people with skin issues. And the question is, this month's client story about the lady with the resolved skin condition was truly inspiring and what a great outcome. It really highlighted the impact of the change personal history technique on trauma, including sexual trauma.

I knew you were gonna say that.

No. Um, it depends, like we've just been talking, um, you have to excuse the, the camera wobbling. It's, it's my computer's sitting on my knee. It depends on the person and what they present with. Um, in a case of trauma, I am gonna do some kind of timeline thing to take them back, um, to get them to let go of what's been connected with what went on back there. Is it going to be change, personal history? Not necessarily.

to add? Well, I just wanna say yeah, yeah. Well it's a great, it was a great story, great example. And, and I, I think your answer's really just some point with what we've been talking about. You know, you work with the person's there. I mean, I think what we're, what I think it's, I think it's just human to find things that you like to do.

Yeah.

Yeah. Like preferences, a technique or a style, or. You know, some method you go, actually, I, I'm, I feel really comfortable and competent with this, so I think that's a good thing to do to become really comfortable and competent with particular techniques. It's also so important to explore others and I think especially the ones you're not so comfortable with.

Yeah.

You, I, I remember there were certain techniques that, oh, don't need to do that. Yeah, yeah. Let's keep away from that. Let's keep away from the language pattern stuff. I remember that.

No, don't look at that though. That was,

that was, that was Michael Breen's fault, you know, to ignore the language. You know, he installed in everybody, you know,

don't need to remember this. You

don't need to remember what was it. Okay. I don't remember.

You could, no, it wasn't

the labels. Don matter.

You can forget the labels. That's what he

said. You can forget the labels. Yeah, so there was an whole element at one point of, okay, the linguistic stuff, I kind of, I. I just need to give people embedded commands or direct instructions, instructors, that'd be fine. So I realized it was a blind spot. So I then went back to that area and really dived into the meta model and the Milton model and the linguistic patterning and meta programs. And to me, the description you gave is brilliant.

Yeah. I remember Richard saying, sorry, years ago. He said, if what you're doing isn't working, do something else. Uh, and in the beginning I'd be working with somebody and my gut would think, oh God, this isn't working. And I'd actually hear Richard in my head saying, time to do something else.

Time to do something else.

Yeah. Or something else out the hat.

Yeah. So yeah, if you've got a blind spot, the same, you kind of a bit adverse to go back and practice it. Um, if you feel completely drawn, totally drawn to one particular technique, fabulous. Master it. But don't then assume that the client that comes in has to, has to endure that particular

technique.

No. Or is gonna be the technique for them. Yeah.

It's not gonna fit everyone. And I must confess, when we, when we do these courses, and I see Richard do demonstrations on stage. Sometimes he does stuff and he kind of, I mean, you know, 'cause you've seen him for years as well. Uh, I mean, he'll, he'll, he'll kind of come up with a, a bit of this, he makes stuff up and a bit of something else. And I sit in the back of the room and I go, whoa, I really like that.

Yeah.

It's in the back of my mind. So the next time somebody comes in with something similar, I'm gonna give it a go. I'm gonna see what it does.

Well I've, I've got a different approach there. I, I feel, to me it's, it's like, uh, it's like martial arts.

Hmm.

Yeah, it's, I can be up here doing something here, but if I move down here and come in here or move over to here and come here. Yeah. What I'm doing is, I'm, I'm, yeah. The immovable problem.

Yeah.

I'm coming at it from different angles. I'm gonna try something here. Try something there. Gives say, oh, that's working. And then when you get, say the works you, in fact, it was Daryl Frank Farley.

Oh yeah.

Who, when I came up to leads that time when you had Frank as a guest, and I think you said to me, have a guy modeling him and it, that was pointless. You know, I just came off stage completely tra like I thought I was hypnotized by Mil and Erickson. But anyway, there was a thing that he said, 'cause someone said to him, how do you know what questions asked what to do? And he said, well, the angels tell me.

Yeah. And then he keeps that rock track. Yeah.

Then he keeps on it. But he is, he is like a, I dunno, a rottweiler and a sheep, isn't he?

Yeah. Was, anyway, again, there's that word again. Calibration.

Yeah. Yeah. And that's the thing. He's

that word again.

He's, he's tuning in to the other person, seeing things, hearing things that other people aren't, you know, sensory, advanced sensory acuity, if you like. Let's link it all back to

Yeah. The

masterclass. Yeah. Um, giving something a go. It's not prescriptive. No, that's not gone where I thought it would going. Let's try something else. Yeah. Look, the person's just look, their eyes just dil, pupils dilated or something. They, no. Yeah, well, their head's nodding. I'm onto something. Let's pursue that. In fact, that's exactly what Linda Pransky was doing.

Yeah.

Yeah. She was asking questions and seen saying, following it up,

and that's what Richard does.

That's what Richard does.

Yeah's what Richard does.

Well, that's what you do, and that's what on the, we both do that, and I'm sure most

many people do. We ask questions, we, here's that word again. We calibrate the response, and of course, if you've got a script and you are following something that somebody's written down for you, you're not watching the person in front of you, so you could miss those little nuances, which will give you the clue you need to let you know you're on the right track. Or not

actually, it just occurred to me, aren't we all always doing change, personal history with people? Because yeah, the future history is changing if they come to see us. So yeah, everything we do is changing personal history. How about that?

Yes. Yes. So in which case, change personal history is my go-to technique.

Ignore everything we just said.

Just forget. Forget everything we just said.

Yes.

It may not be that change, personal history, but it'll be something like it.

Lovely.

Whatever they do.

What else? What else have we got? Tina?

Right? Here we go. So

exciting, interesting,

challenging. Here we go here. Uh ha ha. Oh, here we go.

Um, yeah, it's over there. Yeah. Well, again, I, what I was talking about, just to give it some context, was. Making sure there was nothing in the process there, there were no gaps, nothing could fall through the cracks. Yeah. So as much as possible, automating things, um, so we use a couple of systems on a website. We use, uh, uh, Wix for a website. Um, we're not using WordPress, we're using Wix. But Wix has really improved and up their game in the last three years.

Uh, the next one here says, I'm a work in process with regard to referrals, and I'm researching this. Networking seems to be key, but how to keep it cost effective and manageable.

I'm not sure why networking is key. Um, it can be, yeah. It, it can be, um, cost effective and manageable. Okay, so here's the thing. Who was I talking to? Oh, yeah, it was, I was talking to someone the other day and we're talking about Douglas Adams Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. And, you know, the number 42. Meaning what, which is the, which is the answer to the question, you know, what's the meaning of life, of the universe and everything? Okay. So, okay.

42,

and the relatives of the initial people that asked the question were there and the computer said, I've got an answer, but you're not gonna like it. And the answer was 42. Okay. And they said, I think the problem is you didn't ask a really good question. Okay. So what's the best question? Well, you're gonna need a better computer than me to work that out. So then they decide another computer, right?

Yeah.

And it reminded me of, um, I think it's called the touring holding method. I might, I might be wrong, but it's to do with Alan Touring, um, you know Bletchley Park?

Yeah, I

do. And the Enigma. Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, someone said to him, how long is it gonna take for your computer to work out the problem? Anyway, he went away and came back about two years after the computer worked out the problem and said, I can't tell you. He said, I've worked on this. Right. So he said, um, the only way you can know how long it's gonna take to resolve a problem is by resolving it. And then you know how long it's taken.

it does. No, I know. It does, it does for some people. In the beginning, I, I did, in the beginning, I joined groups. Um. I didn't do the whole breakfast meeting thing, but I know Gloria did. Gloria went to lots of breakfast meetings. Uh, she met lots of people, which got her into companies doing, uh, lunchtime sessions in companies and various other things. She met all sorts of people that way. Um, I did a few and I, I did, I did okay.

I had to be sleeping with. That's the thing. The, but that's the thing. Yeah. You may be social if you don't enjoy it. Yeah. It's not gonna be something where you're gonna be consistent with it. So, you know, in terms of referrals, look, one of the best, one of the best ways to get referrals is from an existing client.

Yes.

Okay. You don't need to go and network to get an existing client. You've got an existing client. One of my clients, um. He gives his, he, he sells really high-end, uh, does really high-end garden design. So it's, uh, 60,000 pound plus for a gardener. Okay. When we first started coaching, it was 25,000. Autonomy was too cheap. He went, oh, no one's gonna pay for this. Now you do not get a garden for anything outta 60 grand. Okay.

Yeah.

Um, but what they do is they produce a beautiful high quality coffee table book of the story of your garden. Okay. So he is, he is a gold medal. Uh,

yeah.

Chelsea winner. Yeah. These books are unique and he gives them two or three of these. Yeah. And that brings in a whole stream of clients. Yeah. As well as the garden. As well as the garden. Yeah. Yeah. People have dinner parties. This is amazing. Yeah. So he's not offering Marks and Spencer's vouchers. He's not offering anything other No. But he's doing something to remind people of who he is and what he is about.

that's

fabulous. And they get it. And he said, um, half the people come back 'cause most of 'em leave not 'cause they're disgruntled. Not 'cause they don't wanna work anymore. 'cause you know, life changed, but they'll, they'll come back. He said, I've even had competitors ring me up and said, I've given so and so a job, he's not gonna stay for me for long. 'cause he just keeps talking about you. He's gonna be going back soon.

That is funny. Sorry.

So, so when it comes to referrals, there are hundreds of ways to get referrals. Yeah. Which ones work? Well find the ones that you really enjoy. Finding the ones I'm comfortable and run the experiment and see what happens. And then do something similar to what we did with like designing your bestseller design, your best referral process. What else can you do to get people to think about you when they go, I know someone's got a problem. Ah. Tina, she's the person.

So, so you need, yeah. I think you need to have a certain personality and you need to be able to wander into these networking situations, gatherings and just light up the room and connect with everybody around you. Um, so I mean, Gloria did really well when I was in the mood. I did okay. I did more than Okay when I was in the mood, but you know, if, if I wasn't in the mood then I didn't actually go. And that's a good thing. 'cause you do need

Yeah, absolutely.

State of mind.

And the thing is, look, we're NL peers. Yeah. If then, if you feel that networking is the key, that's what the conclusion you've come to. And I, I would question that. Yeah. Because I think you can build as good or, well, I don't do any networking.

I don't

don't, I don't do any networking. Yeah. Um. And I've still got a very profitable, flourishing business. Yeah. Um, how do I get that? Well, I get mine by doing something, an event and people go, I wanna work with you.

Yeah.

Okay. And I get it from referral, those two, two areas. Yeah.

I, I, yeah. I get referrals from past clients. Um, I work with them. I help them solve their problems. They come back, they send other people to me. Yeah.

Yeah. Um, so if referrals is a direction to go in, which I'd suggest it is Yeah. Look at a way to get your clients. To refer people to you. Yeah. Um, in a way that's not pushy, but yeah, somehow you remain front of mind to them as well. If you are interested and you feel networking is the key, go and find people that love it, that love networking and how do they do it and, and model them and then run the experiment and find out. And track it, you know, track your time spent.

Yeah.

To acquire that client and is it worth it? Yeah. That could be worth it. Yeah. But if it's, uh, if the laughs don't add up that you've run the experiment, at least you've run the experiment and now you've got the maths. And most people don't do that.

it's been good to see you. I will be back in the UK in a couple of weeks. I've got one more week while we finish off the trainers training here in Orlando. And then I'm gonna spend a week sitting in the sun in Florida. Might even come home with a tan. You don't know

Willie for you? Alright. Fabulous. Thank you. Everyone that's been here and who's gonna be watching this.

Yeah.

And um, we'll see you on the masterclass with Mr. Eric Robbie. Yes. 24th of March, I think it is. Check it

out. A week today. A week today. Eric. Robbie week

today. Yeah. Fabulous.

Something. Bye guys. Bye Steve. See you when I get back.

Bye.

Bye.