Hi everyone, I'm Katie Couric and this is next Question. We're doing something a little bit different this week, something that I'm going to try throughout this season of the podcast, and that is to do a Katie plus one episode. I am so lucky. I know so many great people. They're interesting, they're fun to talk to, they're special to me, and I thought, wouldn't it be fun to invite people to join me and be my little partner in crime
on this podcast. So we're doing it today with my friend Kelly Rizzo and Hi Kelly.
Hi Katie.
I'm so honored to be a or plus one and be your partner in crime. And for the first time me being your partner in crime doesn't involve cocktails or cooking.
That's true. That's true, just talk.
And I thought maybe we could tell everyone listening Kelly, how we know each other and we actually haven't been friends for all that long. I mean, you're a new friend, which I think is so important and that's something I love to do. You know that Girl Scout song make New Friends? The kiel one is silver and the uh now it's around actually, but we're not going to subject our listeners to that.
It has been a little over a year and a half that we've been friends. We met right after my husband Bob passed away, because you had reached out through a mutual friend, because you had gone through that same loss about twenty something years earlier.
Twenty four years early, yes, exactly.
You were about the same age that I was when this happened, so you know what it feels like to have gone through a loss at that time, and you reached out, just kind of offering a friendly ear and a friendly hand, and you're like, I'm here if you want to talk, And of course I took her up on that head.
I just remember thinking when I was reading about what happened to Bob, who I always really liked. Actually, I had a date with him once, as you know, I.
Really liked him.
I found him so cute and funny and amusing, and I did think we shared a pretty nice kiss in the foyer of my apartment.
But he always thought you were lovely.
What can I say?
He was a big fan.
He adored you, well, not enough to call me again, but.
That's okay, that's okay, because it all worked out. It all worked out. He found the love of his life with you. Oh, okay, And I remember thinking, gosh, Kelly, I remember those strange, surreal days following Jay's death. I thought, I know a little bit what Kelly's feeling right now. I'm just going to say, hey, if you need me,
I'm here. We had dinner and then we've just stayed in touch because I've also been very excited about your career and what's ahead for you and tried to tried to give you some advice in that department.
So I'm just thrilled.
There's no better mentor to have than you well, and I've been so grateful a for your friendship, B for your guidance on the personal level, but then see for your guidance and mentorship on the career side of things. And I'm just I mean, when Katie Kurk calls you and says, hey, do you want to do an interview with me, you say yes, And especially when it's such a dear friend of mine as well, which I'm excited about.
That's one of the reasons I thought this would be very good chemistry. And it was serendipitous that my guest today is someone who you know well. I always say when people say that instead of who for a person. People make that mistake a lot, by the way, and that is John Stamos, Katie.
If you and I went out instead of you and Bob, we'd probably still be dating.
I just, oh, quit it some more, John, quit it some more.
Out of me Cooier Saggitt. He could have started with me.
Well, you didn't ask John, and I think I don't think you were available at the time.
Did Bob ask you out?
Yeah?
They were out on a date. He asked her out.
Isn't that funny?
Yeah, I remember, and we talked about it. I think he was intimidated by you.
Please.
He was not really good. I used to have to to see he or know him, like I would tell him what the text and what to say, what to do on these dates, and I, god, I wish maybe I should have gone back to my text and see because I feel like I was. I was texting him, don't blow out X smarter on Katie. She's a very intelligent woman. She's not just beautiful. Be careful, Bob, and you know and yeah, and you guys kissed she.
Did, and as Kelly knows, he was a good kisser.
Oh, I know sheosed him and you know, you guys had a some cuddles that you've you've cuddled on camera and off probably, and you guys joke, you even joke in your book that you've shared a.
Bed with him on multiple occasions.
We were like old married couple. We didn't have sex, and we argued about that. That's funny, John, that is well, you know I learned from Bob. Thank you for having me on this and what a great idea. But isn't it called Katie plus one? Like don't you always have to.
Say the name of the podcast is next question? And some conversations, honestly, John, lend themselves to sort of a single person doing an interview, and some are much better for when there's a connection or someone is passionate about a topic. So this is really an experiment, and Kelly is my first person to do this with. And anyway, when I was going to be in La visiting my daughter and I know you both live in La, I thought, Wow, this will be a great opportunity because I'm excited to
talk to you about your book and your life. And I know what a big deal this is, John, because I wrote a memoir that came out gosh, now about two years ago.
I can't believe it, and it.
Was a very stressful time because you do open up your heart and kind of spell your guts on the page, and it's scary, right.
It was the last thing on my mind. I never thought about writing a book. It wasn't a goal of mine. I didn't think I could do it. Certainly, in my juvenile thinking, I thought, well, all people would care about is you know, talking about who I slept with. And I'm not going to say that because it's not that many anyway, but you know, so I just I'm never going to write a book, and I'd never found my I just didn't think it was something that I would
ever do. And then you know, I became a father and that kind of you know, maybe you know, people were asking that I was now don't know. Then you know, then Bob died and I sat down to write that obituary type thing in the La Times, and I just kind of just poured out of me. And I think the agents saw that and they said, oh, hey, you should write a book. I'm like, now, yes, it was very good writing in that, and I still said no for a long time, and I just couldn't figure out
I didn't want to. I didn't think I and I didn't know how. I didn't know where to start. And then I remembered my mom's letters that she wrote me, and she wrote these beautiful notes that we've kept over the years, and I kind of put them together. I say, Okay, this is a good starting point. But then I wanted to write a love letter to all the people that
have been so beautiful in my life, certainly Bob. I mean, Bob is a through line through the whole, you know, I start with I decided to write I don't know where you started in your book, but I started the two hardest things that I could write about. One was this horrific day I was going to meet Bob at the palm and I got a dui and you know, it was the lowest point in my life. And my five stages of grief then were you know, sex and
more booze, and it was terrible. And then this second chapter that I wrote was the final one, the day I found out that Bob died, and I sort of go through it pretty meticulously, right Kelly, and and my five stages of brief there were of therapy and family and health, and then I just had to feel in the rest of it. But Bob was certainly I don't
know if I don't know he was interesting. I was just thinking, I don't know if I would have wrote this, because a lot of times when I was writing about Bob was like, ooh, he if he was a lie? Would he? I don't think I would have written this book if if he was still around.
Wow, I mean clearly, I think a life event like that has such a profound impact and reminds you of your mortality.
And yeah, you know you lost your husband. When is that?
It was in nineteen ninety eight, believe it or not. So it has been dush twenty five years now, right, And what.
Does that feel like? Is it like the more time that goes by, the less you feel it. And that feels shitty.
Too, right, it does actually, But I mean Kelly and I had a long conversation about that for her podcast. And you know, I always think if something were to happen to me, I wouldn't want the people I left behind. I'd want them to be sad for a little while. I'd want them to be very, very very sad, But I wouldn't want that sadness to overcome them and be a through line through the rest of their lives. As much as you know, I'd want them to think about me, But you want you want people to be as joyful
and feel good. You don't want people to feel terrible. And Kelly's very much that attitude.
I know Kelly struggled. Didn't you struggle with that? Kelly? Yeah, you started to feel sort of good and have a nice half a day and then you feel guilty. Right, Well, if mom would be mad, he would be mad.
But at this point, well that's what I'm saying, John, Like you know, better than anybody, I've had to differentiate between earthly Bob and heavenly Bob. Heavenly Bob, of course would want me to be happy and would want me to enjoy life and to.
Maybe meet for someone, right.
But Earthly Bob absolutely not. Earthly Bob would be like, how dare you? How could you you're smiling? Oh, so you didn't love me at all? Right, I knew it, you know, Like that's how earthly Bob would be, And so you have to separate them, you know, and you know that better than anybody. John, Like how he would have been if he could talk about his own death, but he never wanted to talk about it because he said he was going to live forever.
All right. You called me yesterday crying and it was a you know, I started crying. But what you said was that that the people that didn't know Bob, when they read your book, they'll they'll know the real Bob.
And that meant so much to me because I've just been struggling with not having him around and and as I know you are, but writing the book was it was my way of getting, you know, being close to him again and hopefully, and I feel that phone call made me because I just wanted him to be proud of the of the way I wrote about him, and you know, you said he would be, so that was all I needed here.
Not only would he be proud, I mean I was just so touched and blown away by how you portrayed and depicted your relationship with him. You said things about me and there that like I didn't even know or
that I had forgotten. And there were so many parts of this book that I mean, even myself, as your friend, somebody who knows you very well like I did, I didn't know and it's such like what, oh, my gosh, just even stories, stories about Bob, because keep in mind, I had only heard Bob's perspective on a lot of things, and you know, and we'll get to this, but you know, your relationship with him, even when you guys first started doing Full House together, I had I knew that you
guys weren't besties from day one, but you know, I only heard Bob's side of the story. So it was very interesting to get your side of the story.
Yeah, it was, you know, the two hardest I thought that the writing the chapter about Bob or the opening chapter was gonna be the harst the hardest chapter. Two chapters really that were the Full House ones because I didn't, you know, I know how important the show was to people, and people ask if. Jeff Franklin was over here the other day and he's writing a book, and he was asking me like, when did I come to terms with the fact that you know Full House? And when did
I like it? When do I accept it? And the truth is not until, really, honestly to myself, until I wrote this book, until I put down on paper what that show meant to people, how much it influenced the life, and how it was everybody's family. It wasn't just you know, the last key kid coming home. It was her family and the widow who turns it up a little louder, it was his family. And you know, it's become you know,
the new normal, unconventional family. And the central character on that show was love and it was representing the best of who we could be. And the critics used to just drive me nuts, and I finally just let all that go writing this book and said, this show wasn't meant for you, guys, You're not smarter than me. I
get it. It was fast at times, it was silly, it was big, But what you would you missed is right under that when you put gave you a chance to the brain goes to the side and lets the heart feel. And that's what you intellectual dummies didn't get that I got and the rest of the world got too. So we weren't making it for you, but just digging at it, writing it down and then talking about the relationship with Bob.
I mean it did start off rough. I came from, you know, a sitcom with Jack Clug and who was you know, one of the great television actors, and Gary Marshall was on that show and all these brilliant comics, and every scene that we approached was from the story and character and why I would say this, and that's the way I went into full house. Well, Bob certainly didn't work that way. Bob, as Kelly could attest, was
a laugh junkie. He was addicted to getting laughs and if he couldn't get him from where he's you know, in the show, it was like going down to skid row and getting them. He would make the crew. He would just go for the lowest you know, not the crew, but the type of comedy to make them laugh. And it was it was intrusive to my process. So then just trying to figure out, like when did we click, and it really wasn't until his sister got scalaraderma and
Dave's sister had a terrible cancer. Then they found a brain tumor and my sister, so the three of us were not just sitcom guys that working together. We were three brothers that were losing their sisters. And that's when we really I think connected.
It's been incredibly gosh. I mean, obviously I know Bob's story well about his sister, and I've gone to events for this scleeroderma foundation, but for Dave to have his sister sick and you John, I know she was later diagnosed with MS and it didn't turn out to be a brain tumor after all, but to have those life and death situations, that must have been an incredibly bonding experience for the three of you. And it was that the moment everything changed.
I think. So it sort of just said, what are we doing. Let's put aside our petty bullshit, let's learn from each other, Let's all come a little closer to your process you come to mind. And we did that. And you know what else was interesting just thinking it through, is that my sister made it, like you said, and there's didn't. So that that was I felt guilt about that too. It was strange, but we just continued to
build our love for each other. And you know, thinking about that last dinner, Kelly, I mean, Bob was it was just you know, it was everything you wan wanted in Bob that night. He was just at his to me anyway, it was his best and little things that normally bothered me about him didn't because I too was coming, you know, was starting to come around to be like, you know, not to be such an asshole, and you
know it was. And then he wrote this beautiful thing and you know Instagram, and you don't think of the last time you take a picture like that, to be there, last time with somebody.
Set the scene for me. John and Kelly, you guys run a double date. You were at Noboo in Malibu, right, and Kelly, do you remember that night being as magical as John does?
I do?
And but I'll I'm going to backtrack even one more second, because John, this is something that now literally this just popped in my head. You had said how he was at his best and you were at your best. But I'm thinking back to even maybe just like a month before that is when you guys, remember you had that work trip I think to Florida and you guys were bickering like the old married couple the whole time. And I remember Bob came alone and he was like, oh,
we were driving each other nuts. John was mean to me, and then I'm sure I was mean to him. And you know, you guys were bickering, bickering, bickering, and then we had this dinner that was the complete and total like resolution from that and so there was none of that you guys, you know. I mean, I've been at many dinners with you guys where even you'll you'll bicker like the old married couple, and you guys were just
having the best time. And we truly did have this wonderful, wonderful dinner that I'm so grateful that you put it into words and you documented that better than even my memory allowed. So I'm grateful that I had you as my like documentarian. So thank you for that and for kind of restating it so beautifully.
Yeah, it was. It was special. He was you know, look, I mean it's uh, it's you don't think of losing someone like this like this so fast, and but we've we've bummed everybody.
Hut. Yeah, well you know what I mean. I actually I think it's beautiful. We'll be back with more of John Stamos and my date for this podcast, Kelly Rizzo, right after this. If you want to get smarter every morning with a breakdown of the news and fascinating takes on health and wellness and pop culture, sign up for our daily newsletter, wake Up Call by going to Katiecuric dot com. We're back with John Stamos, Kelly Rizzo and Wah, there is a lot more to you, John Stamos than
Bob Saggatt. And the book is is really while Bob plays an important role in is the through line. As you said, it's really a love letter also to your family, to growing up.
So I wanted to ask you about that.
I mean, you grew up in Orange County in an extremely close knit family with your parents and your two sisters, one older, one younger.
Could fast. You're so great. I haven't seen you do this in a long time, you know, because you know on the morning, it's just hearing your voice, like you were saying Kenly, like she's so iconic, she's so You're so e and smart, but you're also cute and you have this this likability about you and this smile and just to be because I don't think we've done many interviews together to be interviewed by you like this. Sorry to interrupt you, but I just don't know.
Please don't how lucky am I to so on going next to her. I'm just so I feel okay, and.
You look great. You don't age either, thank you, I say either, because I'm talking to myself.
You look damn good. Can I just say, John Stamos, you look damn good. It looks like Can I just say, look at that head of hair? What is that?
I have this very large poster, big like I asked my sister to get a little thing for the book, and it's it's like the whole wall.
I think it's fitting.
I think it's appropriate to you anyway.
Sorry interruption, getting back to my question.
Thank you for those nice things that you just said, But I want you to just describe your childhood. You know, it's so fun to hear how people grew up and how their childhoods made them the people they became. I'm fascinated by that. More conversations are going on about, you know, how you're raised and trauma and all that stuff, and it sounds like you had a pretty lovely childhood. Your dad owned a restaurant called the Yellow Basket, and you worked there as a teen, and you worshiped your dad.
Is that correct?
Yes? Yeah? Yeah, he was my hero. Was he was you know, he was larger than life. And I think when some kids they reached the age where they go, eh, he's just a human. My dad was always a superhero to me. He was till the day he died. He was the coolest mother player. I mean he you know, I got One of the perks of doing what we do is we get to, you know, do great things to meet people. And my dad loves Sinatra, and so
I got to take him to a Sinatra carus. I didn't know Rickles at the time, but he was opening up and that was frank and this is how cool my dad was. So we got a chance to go back, can meet him. It took. It was hard to do, and they said, mister Sinatia wants to see you. You'll know, smoke signal brow and somebody a little Tonio came during anymosion. I missed that Sinatras will see it. We go back and we're taking pictures and everything, and it was time
to take everybody to take a pictures. And I was like, come on, Dale's got fair, here's snatchal you love me? He said, no, I'm good, I'm good and just sat back and just he liked he It was enough for him to see his son with Sinatra. And my mom on the other hand, you know, Jillie Rizzo nearly you know, killed her. She jumped on him and she was trying to kiss him. But my dad was so fucking cool man. He just stayed back and was like, no, that's okay. He was a great man and I got so much
from him. But one of the things that I highlight in the book was that the way he treated people. He he treated his bus boy the same way he would treat his best customer. And I think and I worked on Sundays, and I got I got General Hospital during that time, and and and I remember getting when I got the role. I was in the casting office and I called, I got a call, and I called home phone answers and you could get and everybody was
around the phone and said I got bad news. I got it, and they were screaming, and in the back you can hear min. I go make sure you don't work on Sundays. I need you on Sundays. And sure enough, I auditioned, I got it the two days later. I shot it the day after that, and it aired two weeks later, and it was thirty five million people a day, you know, seeing the show Downer Hospital. And I was I would still have to go to work on Sunday to be my Dad's Sunday guy, you know, and people
finally start, people started coming in and recognizing me. I said that I'm famous. Can I quit? But I think it took. And he came out and saw me on the set one day and he saw the way that I handled people like he does, I think, and then he said, all right, enough of the restaurant. This is a real thing for you.
Go.
I love your son, be the best you can be.
And go.
And he wasn't that old when he passed away.
Well yeah, he was sixty five. It was terrible, but and he wasn't. He was emotional enough, you know how you know, strong Greek dad, he was you know, my mom would say I love you every other word, and he said, damn at Latti say it.
Though.
He came to Yugoslavia when I was doing a movie in the nineties or and he came home and he wrote this beautiful letter and faxed it to me and I read it then whatever. So when he when he had a stroke in the airport in Las Vegas, it was in a stroke, it was it. He was, what's up to think? Getting choked up here?
Uh?
He was a colma for six months and he was at our house and I knew he was going to die any day, and I was looking around in his closet and his drawers for something I could keep it. He was a super humble guy, drove the same car forever. I found a crappy old watch that didn't work. But I moved his shirt or something and I saw I love you Dad. I was like, oh, my heart stopped, like what is this? And it was the original letter that he had faxed me in Yugoslabya and I have
it up there. And the way he laid it out was, you know, A, you know, being on the set, the way you handle people really maybe proud and B my chest is sixty inches, you know, wow because of you and C. He says, A man doesn't have many great moments, but you have given me many.
I love your dad, And now you have that framed in your office at home.
Yeah. Yeah, I write a lot of notes to my kid.
I don't know if you know, but now now I'm feeling like I should have written. My mom used to write put little notes in my lunch bag and say things like don't get stuck in your peanut butter sandwich, but or when she put a banana that's no banana lady, that's my nose, Jimmy to Ranny, but not that. I mean, those I think were the only two notes she wrote me. But it is a very sweet thing, and.
I mean, I love how I mean. Obviously, I've heard wonderful stories about your mom, but the way she's depicted in your book, of course is I mean, she's an angel, she's a saint. And I love that these notes that she's written you, that you actually have in the book, they're like these little guide posts and signposts throughout each chapter.
So how did you come up with that idea?
Well, I was looking for a hook, I guess, to this book, like you know. And I remember telling the agents like I don't like like that book, like the art of not giving a fuck, like I need something like that, you know. And if you would have told me thing. A friend of mine said, hey, why don't you call it if you would have told me, because I've said that forever. He a friend of my Neel was over and Mike Love was calling me, and I didn't answer it, and I said, Toff, you would have
told me. When I was a kid. My first show I ever concerted, I went to it was The Beat sports, and I wouldn't answer the Vollain Mike love call. So it was so that I started that. And then the notes. I knew I had them, and I knew my sisters had some, so I gathered all those together, sort of laid them out. I was like, oh, this is kind of going along with my you know, the first chapter. You know, when I was getting ready to get in my car and go see Bob at the palm and
you know, and I never made it. I looked out the wall, all those frame walls, and I have one of her notes frame and said, don't give the devil a ride, He'll end up doing the driving. And I go, wow, wow, Okay, so that goes there.
So she just did it all the time. Or when would she give you these notes? Would she put them on your pillow? How did it work?
Sometimes they'd be on the pillow. Towards the end when my dad died and I always got divorced, and you know, we were both in a rough place and we needed each other. It was close to being, you know, too much, but it was it was definitely a needy relationship. I would go there and she called her house the Castle of comfort, and so there'd be not saying welcome to the Castle of comfort. But a lot of them, you know,
I found in like birthday cards. It's like some of the stuff she said in these birthday cards were like wow, you know, like thank God gave you to man dad and me and your dad and my life, you know. And I found one too. I don't know if it's in I think so. Yeah. It was like I was the only person that shared a heartbeat with her, Like where does she get that from? But that's I never thought about that. But yeah, that's true.
That's beautiful.
It is.
I write sometimes. Caitlin and I both wrote Billy a letter when he was born, and we put it in the safe. But what I do is I set up an email account for him, so I'll email him once a week, once a month or whatever. And it's easier just to kind of talk into the phone and email. And then someday, I guess I'll write him out. But he's probably got already a couple hundred, you know, letters from me waiting for him.
That's so cool.
You know, I had wanted to do that, you know, the best laid plans of mice and men. I had wanted to write my daughter's a letter every year to say, this is what happened this year. You know, this is what you did. These were some of the moments we had. And John, do you think I did it?
Of course not.
How great idea.
They're thirty two and twenty eight now, so I would like to write them one letter just you know, my book. But my book was kind of my letter to my girls, you know, and they I kind of put it all out and my life lessons are And that's actually one of the reasons I wanted to write my book. I wanted to record something not necessarily for strangers, but for my daughters, you know, that would memorialize my life. And I think this is this is something great for your son.
You know, yeah, I think so. You know, he's a little shit today. He slept with us. He slept with me and Kit was on for a couple of nights, so crawl into bed with me and it was yesterday and wake up in his like, you know, his little face is right up my nose right now, And uh is it?
Dad?
Yeah, you smell like the bathroom at my school. Well, thank you, son, Billy, thank you, Billy. Well, he's so funny and he and his humor is a lot closer to Bob's than mine. And that's you know, sometimes I really get bummed out when I that Bob doesn't get because he just he said, Dad, when if you have to pee and you hold it longer, the pea nest goes away or something like that. That's something Michael Bob would have talked about.
That is very close to a Bob joke that we know about.
I walked by and uh not a couple of months, a couple of weeks after Bob passed away in and he was the nanny was showing him Full House. And most time he watches it just to get enough Ammo to make fun of, you know, to goof on me, and they'll start like, Billy, go clean up your toys.
You got it. But this particular show, he's five and a half and it was The Beach Boys, and he it was this this scene where where Danny was telling Uncle Jesse he wishes that his life rock and roll are cool, and Jesse was saying, I wish I had your life of family and stuff, and in truth, it was it was the real us. It wasn't the characters.
And I just lost it and I was kind of he could see me out at a side of perpet and and you know, in a moment of coolness that that I haven't maybe haven't seen since he let me have that moment, and I was, you know, I was just choked up, and he looked at me and I just kind of walked away. But so sometimes he can be cool. He's the light of mine.
He's so cute. He's so cute. He's like a little mini John is a handsome kid. I stalk you guys on Instagram.
So weird. I try to teach him because now it's like he's a lot of people know you're cute. You're trying, and I said, no, you're not. You know, I gotta figure out how.
You don't want to get to well. Also, you have to praise different things. You have to praise his grit, the fact that she doesn't give up, that he tried to think, the fact that he's kind to other people. Yes, yeah, that's so important because especially for girls, like I used to say, if somebody said to my girls, so you're pretty, and I'd say, but they're very smart. Actually they're they're smarter than they are.
Yeah, yeah, I tell him now, just this morning. I said, people, you want people to like you because you're smart, and you're kind and you're compassionate, which he is. Yeah, that's what you know. But he's a little and I wasn't like this as a kid. I guess Caitlyn was a flirt of her. He he's got girls. Remember Kelly at my birthday party a couple of weeks ago, Gabella still
Isabella and too much. We were in Disney in Paris, and I swear this so he It was two days and the first day we had a guide, older French woman, very nice but maybe in her fifties or sixties, and believes. The next day, this beautiful third thirty year old French shows up. It was a bit and billy like boom and here's his move, which I can't use because I'm married. But he's like, uh so, what's my favorite color?
Still? So?
What kind of uh? What's my favorite animal? Huh? Like he's quizzing them on his stuff. So and then I kind of overhear him talking about his girlfriend, Bella. He's gotta go my girlfriend Bella and she lives in the neighborhood. It's really nice and spiring. Mamma then the lady goes, excuse me, I have to go the Beth of them super walks me it's soon, swear to God. As soon as she's out of earshot, he goes to me, goes, why did I tell her I had a girlfriend?
Wow, he's already a player.
That is.
I don't like it. I don't like it.
Wait, So, speaking of Disney, so obviously I know you as the biggest Disney freak of anyone I've ever met in my life. Like, I didn't know like Disney File was a thing until I met you. But in your book you talk about like the origins of it, which was so interesting to me because I never really knew where it came from.
Growing up next to Disney. Yeah. Well, I mean you're talking child and my childhood was it was. It couldn't have gone better. And I think a lot of people kids would go to the Disney to escape whatever they were dealing with at home, and I it was the opposite For me. I just loved it. But it was also when once you walked through those gates, the artistry, and you know the way that that these brilliant imagineers
want you to feel. Age Lambs, I really got attracted to that, and it was a place that's sort of where I reached puberty. There was a place to you know, trying to pick up, try to pick up girls. I never really quite got it.
It was kind of your like your mall growing up maybe.
Yeah, yeah, right right, yes, and so yeah, I'd be standing in line there with my dad's members only jacket and zits and hair and feather members.
Oh my god, that brings back memories my dad.
Still, the chicks didn't like that. I realized that. But Kelly, we all went. We had a great Remember, we all with Dave and his wife Melissa, and we all wore Onesies. Remember.
Yeah, Bob was not happy because it didn't quite fit.
It was didn't like he couldn't quite sip it.
And he was very unhappy that we forced him to wear the ones.
But you proposed to your wife at Disney World or Land. I guess disney Land out here, Disney World in Orlando.
Yeah, yeah, like I had a choice. I was done with Disney until I met her, and then she's fucking back in again.
One of the things you write about John is that you wanted to be famous from the beginning. I mean, why What did you see that sparked that in you that said I want to be a household name or I want it, I want people to know me.
Yeah. I do say that a lot, and it is true. But in closer look that it was really about being liked because I, you know, I was before the bullying was even a term. Some jack asked gave me a black eye because his girlfriend wanted to go out with me, and you know that was so humiliating, and I wasn't you know, I was a dorky kid. I like puppets and magic and nothing cool about any of it. And girls. I put a picture in the book of me with
a puppet trying to impress some girls. She's like, oh, then you know the next picture you see me on drums like I gotta. But so I think it was more of just wanting to be liked. But I did you know, being famous was something that I wanted first, and then then I learned acting. Acting Okay, I don't learn that, but it was yeah, you know, it was you know, maybe did you find this writing your book that I really discovered my story as I was writing it, Like again, like I didn't think it's your life, so
you go, ah, it's okay, it's not do that. I play with it. But as you when you write it all down, there's a lot.
Yeah.
And I was always sort of trying to find the relatable you know places, and certainly being a dorky kid and being bullied, you know, was one. And being cheated on. You know, I think you know, people probably think, oh, he's never gonna get cheated on looking at him, and you know, my wife cheated on me because I have no money. I'm not good like no, no, no, no, no, it's people are assholes. That's why he got cheated or not. But so I was trying to find as many relatable
moments throughout the book, and they kind of came. But what I was going to ask you was, did you find like as I was discovering my story, I realized so many things that happened back then that I get now. It was in the middle of a lot of cultural being on General Hospital, and the storylines between the black actors and the white actors was so different, and they had to get their hair done in another place and
look back, I said, wait a minute, that's segregation, you know. Now, you know, we're dealing with homophobia in the theater, inequality in the workplace for women, my dad. It was so great to write about my dad. He never held my mom wanted to be a housewife and she was great, and my dad never held that over. He never said, I'm not going to make the money you don't. In fact, he thought her and praised her for her job was harder and more important, and it was. Those are the
examples that I had. But looking back at all those you know, those kind of tent poles moments of my life, was interesting.
It is interesting. I think also if you look back, how much things have changed. You know, I mean, I'm older than you are, John, I think by six years, but you're, well, how are you? I'm sixty six, Yeah, so kind of the same generation. And you know, you think about like when we were little, nobody was out if they were gay. I mean, it was a very
closeted world. So much homophobia you think about, you know, there was if there wasn't segregation, obviously there was de facto segregation with a black part of town where I grew up. And women obviously the role of women and the aspirations you could have as a young woman. My mom was a housewife as well, and my dad never you know, lauded that over her. But she just didn't have that many choices, you know. There weren't that many opportunities for my mom to have a life outside the
home in a very tangible way. So sometimes when I was writing my book, I would be like, Wow, we have really evolved as a culture. Obviously, we have a long way to go. It's not like we've eradicated sexism or racism or all the isms that haunt us as a society. But the progress that has been made, it is the changes in attitudes. It's pretty something, you know, it's something to behold.
Yeah, and I think, you know, yeah exactly. And I think about a lot about, you know, some of the sexual endeavors that I went through in my life that you know, you think of them as. Back then, it was like, oh, every school boys dream, you know. I walked into my dressing with a naked girl in the closet, and and and this penthouse pet came in and had sex with me, and and I, you know, I'm happy to say that they were not what I thought it was going to be. I didn't feel good after. I
didn't like it. I wanted to love, I want to like my family. But yeah, so I found those things. We certainly, this me Too movement has been so incredible because it's just it really, women have really done a brilliant job at making us men, you know, straighten up and look at you know, look at the way that they've been treated over the years. Uh So, a lot of that, But then you look at so then we you know, with racism and some of this stuff like
have we not got past this yet? Come on, there was so much of it, I guess stamp down without Okay, we're moving forward, and now it's bubbling up again.
But I think we're having the kind of conversations about it, John, that we never did when we were younger. I think it was just sort of part of our lives. And I remember when I did my my daytime talk show, which I renamed My Stupid daytime talk Show, even though there were some good episodes, but I remember thinking, well, it wasn't It's just I that's a longer story, read my book. But it's just that I never got to the kind of things that I really wanted to explore.
Was not necessarily perfect for what a daytime audience.
Was looking for nowadays, you would do, you would say, fuck you, this is the way I want to do my show, and here's what I'm talking about.
Well I did, and it was canceled. But anyway, well, okay, good though, Yeah, yeah I did, and but but I remember wanting to do a story of an episode or a show on Race and I remember, like nobody, we couldn't figure out how to address it or how to attack it because it just wasn't part of the national conversation back then. So in a way, we've had so many growing pains talking about systemic racism and even sexism, but at least they're being talked about, if not solved, right, yeah.
Then there's some culpability. There's some people that are having to you know, it's interesting they didn't. The publisher kept saying, where's Laurie want to talk about the you know, the college gatter you got to write about there. I said, no, I don't, And I talked to Laurie about it. She says, yeah, go ahead, We'll trying to say anything you want. You can defend me. I said, Asheria, and I sort of wrote it out. I said, no, this is not I didn't like it. And then so it was nothing there.
And then I said, it does feel like there's something missing, and I went back and I just wrote about from my point of view, the way she went through it. Everybody makes mistakes big and small, and by the way, like the last person you think on full that would go to jail first be me, probably Jodie or both of us together. But the way she you know, it was a study and resilience and the way she got up every day and you know, took care of a family and took care of a marriage. I mean I
would have crumbled way for she did. So that was interesting to be able to just write about her and have that conversation, not picking sides.
She is so strong.
Just her attitude and outlook on everything, you know, for what she went through to just have such a positive just a smile on her face and a positive outlook.
On things, it's really remarkable.
That must have been mortifying and horrifying for her to go through. And people, I mean, I'm not saying what she did was right, but people are so cruel and so righteous and judgmental.
That must have been really hard.
The mud that was slung at her kids daily too, you know, in her family. But she you know, yeah, I mean it was the way that she handled it, and she she was accountable. She did everything she was supposed to do. Go to jail, do this, you know, and and and a lot of people don't know that during that time she was going and helping kids in schools and you know, under privileged kids and bringing food to anyway, she's a saint, and she you know, she made a big mistake and typical Lori fashion, weish she
got out of jealous. How was it, she goes, Oh, it wasn't bad. I met some I met a couple of really nice ladies. We're in our book club now, and it was like, okay.
She said.
She took the time to get to know everyone there and learn their stories, and they all had a lot of difficult stories, and she really wanted to understand, like what brings people to that place.
You know, she's never.
Really done an interview, has she No, No, you should get her only about it anyway, John, I wanted to ask you just a few more things about the book. And one is your obsession or lifelong love, I should say, of music. And you included a niche quote in your yearbook without music life would be in the steak.
Yeah, my dad thought it was so stupid. He goes, that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, really, Dad, Well, look who I'm playing with today.
Yeah, well, let's talk about your music and how you fell in love with music and the whole process of that.
I was drumming was my main thing. And by the way, if you can see, can you see, Kelly was kind enough to give me Bob's guitar. It's the back when in the middle, see that. And I don't play it because if I picked it up and started playing it be like dog licked my balls. Fu fu fuck. But you know, so I try not to pick it up, but not a digress and I'll go back to you
need to we need to, Kelly. There's one recording of this song before Bob died, and he was working it into his act and it's about I just saw it the other day. He sings a song about falling in love with her dad.
It's about my dad. It's called I'm Not in Love with my Wife's father. Yeah, and it's about my dad and it's hilarious. And there's only one because he never recorded it and he never it was going to be in his new special, and so he didn't want anyone else to record it because he didn't want to getting out there because it's supposed to be a surprise in the special. And so I recorded it at his one of his last shows ever in Denver, and I have a video of it, and at some point I need
to release it. And John had, you know, a good idea for maybe how we should release that one day.
But maybe you could do it and raise money for Clara Derma or something.
What was the idea to play it right now?
On Katie's podcast, No, No, No, I wish I was thinking, of course, you know, I like the way you think, John Stamos.
But then I was thinking, no, no, Kelly's way too smart for that.
Well, it's got to be debuted somewhere.
I don't know.
Well, No, she had a good idea. It could be to raise money for the SRF.
By the way, this is a This is the bracelet that we put out to raise money for Bob's charity and Kelly's charity, and it's the biggest selling bracelet. It's uh, we have a thing called Saint Amos and you can buy a bracelet this this is one's for Bob.
I know, I love that you guys did that.
And wait, what does it go for? Is that first claraderma something else?
Yeah, well it's their charity like in conjunction with the SRF, which is really really nice.
And what is your charity?
John so thoughtful?
Well, I've devoted over the last thirty thirty five years to the abused children and you know, to stop that which it's you know, there's been on the rise since the pandemic and I, you know, I talk a little bit about it in the book. You know something that
happened to me. I felt sort of like a Charlottan not talking about you know, I had a instiand with a babysitter when I was twelve or so, and it was I stopped it away and I I came back when I was writing a speech for an event that they were giving me an award for the childhood and I said, you know what, now is not the time I'm going to pack this away. And then when I was writing the book, I was just like, yeah, I did I work? Did I put everything in here that
I will? Oh wait a minute, what about that? And I talked to my sisters and I talked to Kate then and it's very brief, but I but you know, it was important to me to talk about it. It's a very you know, uncomfortable situation with a babysitter, and you know, I think that I think the the rate is like seven out of every twenty five girls have been you know, sexually abused, and only four something out of every twenty five men boys. But that's because boys
don't talk about it. So I felt it was sort of important to tell my my incident there.
The numbers are really amazing, aren't they When you think about it, how prevalent it is, and you know what a hidden, dark secret is for so many, so many people, and how how much it shapes them going forward with their view of themselves and the way they look at others and relationships and all that.
Yeah, that's why I thought it was important. And we have a one eight hundred number one eight hundred four a child and this is one of the reasons why I mentioned the book too, so I could talk about that because if you you know, if you feel like there's abuse going on, you can call. The other thing is like we talked to if your parent and you're stressed and and you're thinking about getting angry at your kids. You can call that number two. So that was important.
We'll be back with more of John Stamos and Kelly Rizzo my Plus one right after this. We're back with Kelly Rizzo and John Stamos. Let's go back to music, because I feel like you didn't really tell me about that, because you write without music, life would be a mistake. That's a Nietzche quote. My dad thought it was stupid. I don't think he knew how important music was to me.
Of course, he didn't think it was so stupid. When I went on to play drums with the Beach Boys, John Fogerty and Bruce Springsteen, BB King, Willie Nilson, Little Richard, America, God, remember America. I loved America, Tom Jones and many more grades over the years. That's so cool.
Yeah, vibe. Yeah, I've been blessed to I'm a good I'm a decent drummer. I'm not a terrible singer. And a melody was always sort of escape. I love hearing it, but I can't play, so I played drums. It was my identity, you know, even before wanting to be an actor. I didn't evenly act in school, and I didn't really it wasn't in any of the plays. And I wasn't a good singer. But finding something early and I encourage any parent to steer the kid towards something that they
helped find their identity. And that's how I wasn't junior high school and high school. I was a music I was a drummer. I was in the marching vantag Jutment. I just loved it. I just loved it. And the first time I heard the Beach Boys song at Disneyland, I was across the park at the Matterhorn and I heard Sloop John b and it pulled me over like a like you know, like a pied piper, you know. And I pulled up. I just got to the stage and they were singing this a cappella part of Slop
John Bean. Was like, oh my god, what is it? What is that? You know? It was? I call the Beachwoys music heart music. You don't have to think about it. But and so I just set off and being the acting cut sort of took off first. I always wanted to play drums on TV. When I was on General Hospital, there was a I was asked, can I play drums? Like, we're not taking requests, kid, you know, relax. And then one day I said to my dad, Dad, this guy
named Sammy Junior. Something's on the show. What about like samm David Junior. M yeah, oh my god, he's a legend. And that started my love for the rat pack of my dad saying you got to listen to Otra, to Dean Martin or Sammy. So I said, what do I talk to him about? He said, well, he's a drummer. Talked to him about playing drums maybe. So the scene was that that Sammy was playing a character and I was the host of the talent show at the Waterfront.
We were raising money for the street kids stuff, and I was I was standing next to him. I said, mister David, they won't let me play drums on the He said right. And I talked him about music and I had a real conversation about it, and I do impressions.
This, yea, yeah, do it. I was like, keep going.
So so he's so. I talked to him about music and he said, okay, ba, how hold on man? And he goes over to uh somewhere to talk to the producers and he comes back and just do what I say, man, I know what, And I remember him being very firm, just do what I said in the scene, like okay. So I introduced him as the character and he comes out and then he goes, uh, Blackie, you playing drums? Right, I'm like, and it completely had lived and you can it's on YouTube. I'm like, yeah, let's come up here.
That's the best way to start the show, since I'm an opening act.
It was a little jazz come together, that's it. And he plays there was a drum, there was a band set of it, and he's playing piano and I'm playing drums and you want two three four, And you could see this stage like passing on to the young man like you you got you one of us. You're a musician, you get it. And it was the most beautiful and we just kept playing. They didn't stop us, they didn't
dare stop us. And I heard later that everybody in New York and LA and they were all everyone was walking towards the monitors like, you know, like, oh my god, what having And he and it ended and he gave me his big hug, and it was just, you know, it was I've been playing music on the TV ever since. Thanks to him.
What a great story, What a great story.
And now you and Mike Love and the Beach Boys are like BFFs, right, the Beach Boys.
I was obsessed with the Beach Boys as a kid. I was obsessed with them and I it was the first concert I ever went to at the Universal level theater, you know, before I had the roof on it. And I just never imagined that one day I'd be with him. One of the first times I played with them was in They would do these concerts, you know, at the Fourth of July, and they did a few shows, and
then James Watson they're attracting the wrong people. They're not America's band, blah blah, and they banned them and brought.
Oh they did the Interior Secretary.
Yeah, that's Jacks and and they got Wayne Newton instead, and so don you know, and Nancy Reagan's now I'm more of a you know, she was more of a surfer girl than had dunka Shane Gallant. So they got rid of him and then brought the Beach Boys back. And that's when I did it with him. In the afternoon. It was in Philadelphia for a million people and there were bobs from and then DC for seven hundred and fifty thousand people. That was one of the first times I played with them.
Wow are you worried about anything in this book? John, I mean you talk about your marriage to Rebecca Romaine. That was challenging and difficult, and I always thought, Wow, two people in the same profession must be a very fraught situation, right, And it turned out to be for you all.
Yeah, I don't know if it was because I mean she yeah, I don't know. It was interesting that again, that was a discovery that I made, Like the and you know what, you're the first person asking me about that.
This.
They were saying, well, you have to write about that. I said, no, I don't, but I guess I did. And what I came to discover, you know, all these years I was like, she's a terrible president. She even did this, and she did that, blah blah blah. And in Rihab when I was doing the twelve step, the fourth step is to down all your resentments, and she did that. You know, I had a field day with that.
And that you know, the guy says you're done, and I said, no, there me another pen writing all this stuff, and he said, no, what part did you play in that?
Is it?
What? I don't paid it, even if it was one percent of it. And I started writing that down, and I realized I had more to do with the demise of our marriage than I was willing to admit all these years. And at that moment I had just learned to forgive and let it go. But so that was the only way I really was going to write about that. You know, what happened in the book that you know that that she was It just didn't work out. No good guys, no bagg you. It is just the way it is.
Well, you know, I think writing a book, you have to be honest about your flaws, and sometimes that's kind of embarrassing, you know, but you you know, you have to say where you fell short and what you wish you had done differently. I mean, it's a it's a very sometimes painful look at your life. Obviously, there are a lot of incredibly wonderful things that happened, but you have to reassess some of the things that you did and own it.
Yeah, otherwise, what's you know, what's the point. I did start out like to write a hero story I did, and then I was like no, no, no, no, and then it became a human story.
Well, you said you wanted it to be relatable, and that's how you can be relatable is when you're human and you're showing you know, as you said, like how you fell short, and you know, if you're the hero story, it's not going to be as relatable to people.
Right before we go, Kelly, obviously, I think for you from what I understand reading about Bob and reading what John wrote about Bob and what he meant to him, I mean, that must have been an incredible experience for you, both one of of pain but also one of great memories. And when you called John after you read the part about Bob, what did you say, Yeah, well.
I wanted John to know in case we didn't have as much time to discuss it today, like just to hear from me how much it meant to me, not only as Bob's wife and as John's friend, but also just as somebody in the public who's going to read this, how they're going to see Bob and see how he was portrayed as a person, as a friend as I mean, because you know, you write about even parts of our relationship or mine and Bob's, you know, as a husband, as a friend, as a brother, which you had said
that you guys had always both you wanted brothers, and so you guys finally did become that to each other after you know, wasn't right away.
Took a few years.
But I told you yesterday when I called you in tears that it just meant so much to me that you told his story so beautifully and about just who he was and how people reading this are just to gets such an incredible picture of who he truly was
as a person. But also the memory that you have of so many of these instances were so detailed, And it was also so great to get it from your perspective, because, as I said, I had really only heard Bob's perspective, and you just did such a beautiful, wonderful tribute to him. And he would be so proud. I know his girls are going to be so proud. I'm so proud, and you should just be so proud.
Than that means the world to me. I was really you know, I didn't know what I didn't know. I was really thank you. I appreciate that.
I mean, I was telling Kelly, I lost a good friend recently, and I am going to carry her in my heart and try to be more like her moving on. And I'm just curious if you if there's anything about you that changed after losing Bob.
Well, yeah, of course. I mean, you know, Kelly can attest that his whole thing was he never left anything on the table. I always said, I love you, I care about you know, and tomorrow is never promised. And Bob lived his life that way, right, And he went out. I remember talking to him home Jamie the Curtis she
wrote the thing in the front. I remember telling Jamie like he was so alive, and she said, yeah, and that wouldn't you rather die alive and vibrant than some old you know, comrudging on the couch, you know that didn't you know, fulfill the dreams? Kelly can attest he was, he had a new thing about him. He felt like a teenager again. He was doing new stuff. And he played that last night. That last show he played was
like a two hour show, right. I mean, he just and and you know I just wrote about just picturing him going, you know, on his way home, he called Kelly and said he had a great show, and he had a picture and he wanted her to fix it up, and she said, you look handsome, but I don't need to fix anything there, and he and it was beautiful, and he just loved you so much, Kelly, and and he I just pictured him going to bed thinking about all of us, all the people that he loves, that
he would see us again, and that the laughter didn't have time to die down and he left us. But I just, uh, that's the way, That's what I hope he felt when he fell asleep and didn't wake up.
Well, if I could just share one thing, sorry, I just I love you John anyway. That really got me. That made me like start bawling. This is why I called you yesterday because there was one quote from it that you know, for people listening to this that it was such an incredible, like personal little exchange that just shows how well you knew Bob too. And it's just kind of explained this like all three of our relationship. But you said, I knew from the start that she
really loved Bob for the way we all did. She'd listened to him rattle on about himself for a bit longer than I usually would. The first time she said to him, this isn't all about you, Bob, I knew she was the one.
He'd pout.
She'd kiss him, and in a sweet tone, she'd say, you know, I love you, honey as we hug in the driveway. Tell her you got ripped off. You didn't have him long enough. And you know, and I've said before that that's one of those things that it's so understandable why people think that, because you know, we'd only been we'd only had three and a half years of
being married. But and I'm sure you feel this now too, that it's just there's so much of an overwhelming feeling of gratitude that we did have him at all, versus feeling we didn't have him longer.
So that's true. We're all better off because of him, and you know, we have to really take his thing and just live each moment the most we can and be loving.
And as you said, leave nothing unsaid. Maybe that's a good lesson from Bob. You know, tell people in your life regularly what they mean to you.
Amen.
And you both mean so much to me.
Oh thanks John.
By the way, when I instagram stalk you, you were beloved. I mean everyone loves you, John Stamos.
What is that supposed to mean?
You're very popular?
Like when it was your birthday, all the notes and the comments. I was like, good lord, this guy is is very well loved. And I meant it as a compliment, not as a diss and well, no, I agregiate it.
But yeah, okay, thank you. I mean, you know, but I think that's another reason to write a book. And I'm sure you felt this too. It's like, the book is not like an Instagram post and a blip here and a blip there, and here look what I'm doing here. You know, it's a deep, deep die. Right, But thank you, Katie. I'm gonna listen to you. I'm gonna start listen to your book tonight. Really, Okay, did you enjoy that the audio?
That was my favorite part was the hardest, But I really loved doing the other.
It was hard, honestly, and it was during the pandemic. So this makeshift studio I put together in a bedroom, I have like blankets. It was like a fort we build as a kid, with pillows and blankets and under you know, this huge.
Mess of stuff.
Because we didn't have a recording studio to do it in and it was exhausting. I have to say it was exhausting, but it was worth it because I think to have you narrating your own book, telling your own story, I can't imagine getting someone else to read your words.
And by the way, you're a very good writer.
John, Oh, thank you. Yeah. It was the hardest that they said, oh, you can get it done a five or six days. I took like thirty two days or something, because you would it would just start, first of all, your cold reading your life, and that's weird, and you could change things that didn't sound right, and it was very emotional. I would just go after a couple hours and be like, I gotta go too much.
Yeah, you got to pace yourself.
I'm glad I did it, and I'm glad to talk to you guys today about this.
Yeah, and I'm excited to hear your audio as well.
Well.
Thank you for doing this, John Kelly, thank you for doing it this, Thank so for coming on in. I think Kelly added such an important dimension, and it's really nice for me to witness your friendship and how much you love each other and mean to each other, and the fact that you tell each other that and leave nothing unsaid.
I appreciate you Ken, I love you brother.
Thanks for listening. Everyone. If you have a question for me, a subject you want us to cover, or you want to share your thoughts about how you navigate this crazy world reach out. You can leave a short message at six oh nine five one two five five five, or you can send me a DM on Instagram. I would love to hear from you. Next Question is a production of iHeartMedia and Katie Kuric Media. The executive producers are Me, Katie Kuric, and Courtney Ltz. Our supervising producer is Ryan Martz,
and our producers are Adriana Fazzio and Meredith Barnes. More information about today's episode, or to sign up for my newsletter wake Up Call, go to the description in the podcast app, or visit us at Katiecuric dot com. You can also find me on Instagram and all my social media channels. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.