#1380 - Are Your Weaknesses Getting Weaker?

I enjoyed that one very much . Today , for episode number 1,380 . Happy Tuesday . Are your weaknesses getting weaker ? So , as I've mentioned before , i used to have a job where I made a good amount of money and I kind of sucked at a lot of the stuff . I did , believe it or not . So , just for for context , i was in an industry called weatherization .

We'd work on the windows , we'd work on doors , we'd work in attics , we'd work above drop ceilings . The theory behind the entire industry basically is you keep the good air in the bad air out right Energy . If you're cooling down the air , the last thing you want it to do is go out the windows , because there's a giant gap between the window and the frame .

So we'd cock the windows and there was a bunch of stuff . But one of the things we did was in these schools . Believe it or not , a lot of people might not think this . they're not think this , but schools have massive attics because above the hallways , above the classrooms , there's usually an attic , and these attics are mass , they're massive .

I mean the ceilings are like 20 feet higher than the floor . It's , it's yeah , it's massive . So we would go in there and we would blow this insulation in .

We had this big machine out in a trailer where and it was actually fun loading it but you would take these bales of insulation , which is like shredded up newspaper and some other stuff , you'd rip them out of the bag , you throw them in this machine .

This machine would crush it up , feed it to a hose and it would fire it all the way up into the attic and you'd spray it in in the attic . It was probably three years where I was with this company before I had ever tried to to do the blown in insulation in the attic .

I had done a lot of loading of the hopper , as it was called , because it was easy , but I was always afraid to do the thing that I was weakest at . And here's the interesting thing , the second I decided you know what , i know how to do everything else .

I know how to work on doors and how to work on windows , like I'm good , i'm good with all that , i'm not really worried about it . The weakness that I created actually got weaker because everybody else around me was getting better at it and I was a foreman So I had to learn this at some point .

So eventually I bit the bullet and I went up in the attic and I said , all right , let me figure out how to do this . And it was terrible . And you're supposed to make the insulation level . It wasn't . It was wavy and mountains and it was brutal . It was brutal .

There was a lot of peaks and a lot of valleys , much like our , our career here at Nexelov University And it . But it makes sense . It really makes sense why when you have a strength , you double and triple and quadruple down on the strength and you're actually creating weaknesses , or you're you're creating blind spots .

That's the the notes that we had for this episode . The blind spot for me was I am getting worse at something I've never done because in my mind I can't do it cause it's a weakness . We always .

If you're in the fitness space or if you've ever known bodybuilders or you know , you know somebody who goes to the gym frequently you might hear , friends , don't let friends skip leg day . That's something I've said , that to Alan . It's just , it's like a meme in the in the fitness industry .

One of the reasons why is many people they're really good at a different exercise , so maybe they're good at bench press or they're good at squats , or their legs aren't their strongest suit . So what happens ? They stop using them . They don't . They don't go and do leg day because leg day sucks .

Then they end up having weak legs and they get weaker and the rest of their body gets bigger and they end up being very , very top heavy . That's kind of an analogy for this where if you have a strength and you double , triple , quadruple down in your strength , you're creating weaknesses because you're not working on the things that you could get better .

At Last part . I understand completely why that is because when you're really good at something , the last thing you want to do is go focus on the thing that you're not good at at all , because if your self-worth and your self-belief and your significance is tied up in , i'm really good at this . Therefore I get attention .

It's gonna be very hard to say I am not good at this . I might get attention , but it might not be the kind that I'm after . So I very much understand , but I'm as guilty of this as anybody else , especially looking back into the past .

Because the idea here is yeah the idea here is every one of us has a unique strength , so if you're listening to this , there's something that you are better than I am at and better than Kevin at No question . I've never met a human who isn't better than me at something , and that means usually that there's a weakness on the other side of that .

So confidence is one . If you're very , very confident . Arrogance is most likely the weakness , so sometimes you're probably a little arrogant or overly confident , and so this is an inherent thing . But yeah , so what are some common ones that you've seen ?

It's usually setting and keeping boundaries because it's just kind of hard to do that When you're super , super caring . It's hard to set boundaries oftentimes because you feel you can feel the discomfort when somebody butts up against your boundaries . It's a very uncomfortable feeling to have And we're actually going to talk about boundaries on Thursday .

So for episode 1382 , we're going to talk about boundaries . That's one . The strength is understanding what fun and short term fulfillment looks like . I think the potential weakness or bottleneck that comes with that is not understanding , not having a long , long , long term time perspective . That was definitely me . I did not have a very long time perspective .

We're also going to do an episode on that this week too , which is interesting . I think this is going to be a really good week of content . Those are a couple . Again , it's interesting how almost everything boils down to one thing that is an umbrella of everything .

Somebody asked me recently how do you do seven episodes a week without talking about the same stuff And I said we do talk about the same stuff very often , But it's from a different perspective with a different story and everything is connected differently .

So if you have low self-worth , that's boundaries , that's toxic relationships , that's probably letting yourself down . Maybe your self-trust isn't high Time perspective probably isn't there . It's interesting how one thing can connect to so many other things .

So , honestly , most of our community is very , very , very , very heart driven , super positive , probably the most positive person in their friend group , but they also have low self-worth And everything that comes with low self-worth .

So , whether it's relationship talks , coaching or peak performance coaching or business consulting , or I've started recently doing calling it CEO coaching , which is essentially the same as peak performance coaching , but specifically for CEOs , and all I'm really doing is problem solving in a unique way .

So , really , what you're doing is you ask questions and you get information , you get data , you take it in And then you're finding the . You mentioned the umbrella . You're finding the umbrella point And then you're solving that . I'll give an example . Okay , amy L sent me a . She's on the team , so shout out to Amy Linus .

She sent me a picture and she wouldn't mind me sharing this . I have permission to share this . I like to make that clear , cause I don't want anyone to think I'm ever going to share anything that we talk about , but anyways . So she sent me a picture saying huge win .

Today I think she said small win , but I'm calling it a huge win where she went out in a crop top and she was like pumped about her physique and her body because she's been I think it's 300 plus days in a row of exercise . It's unbelievable , and when her and I first started working on exercising consistently .

I want to bring you to the root cause of why we did that because exercising consistently was not the cure all . Let me rephrase it was the cure all , but the issue was self-esteem .

Okay so , amy L , amazing leader , great communicator , bright , shiny , light , wonderful human being , heart driven , capable , competent , struggles a little bit with tech , amy , but you're coming up on that and you're aware of that , all good , but I'm sitting there like , okay .

When I first met her it was like oh okay , low self-esteem , struggles with boundaries , blah , blah , blah . All we have to do is solve that . That's the one thing . And again , underneath that is low self-worth . But self-esteem , i think , is the daily version of self-worth .

So if you're building self-esteem on a day to day , eventually your self-worth will be higher . So anyways , root cause analysis If self-esteem is the issue , why doesn't she have high self-esteem when she's so amazing ? I see her as amazing . She doesn't see her as amazing , she does more now , by the way , amy .

So if you're listening , i'm not projecting onto you , but I see her as more amazing than she sees herself , and I'm certain of that . At the time especially , i was like oh okay , so I think your value's here . You aren't seeing that . Why , okay , self-esteem Okay . Why is self-esteem low ? It's the umbrella concept . It's tied to body image .

It was tied to letting herself down in fitness . So in my head it was like oh my God , here's the cheat code . All we have to do is solve fitness And then everything else is gonna proliferate . For me that was true as well .

I talk about seeing Superman and then running to the bathroom and seeing myself in the mirror crying , pouring my alcohol out and then going back to the gym . My self-esteem issues were tied to body image . I wasn't in shape and I knew I was letting myself down . So fitness for me is what really brought me into the man I am today .

for sure , fitness has saved my life as well as personal development , but anyways . So here's my point . All we did was work on her slowly but surely getting consistent in fitness . Now she's building self-esteem , now she's empowered . Everything else gets better now .

One thing that I think is fascinating to bring this back to the original episode every strength comes with a weakness .

Eml I would consider to be a powerful , positive , influential , empowered leader , female leader , and I think that a lot of people are intimidated and or find ways or reasons not to like her X , y , z , and so her being amazing is a huge strength , but it comes with a weakness , because her self-worth was low , because she gets mistreated often .

Okay , and if you're listening to this show , you probably have been empowered at times and been lashed out at or knocked down , or knocked down a peg or talked poorly about or whatever right , which is why we're all so damn scared to be empowered , by the way , because it's just a thing . And so the weakness that comes with that is low self-esteem .

How do you solve that ? And so , if you're out there listening , what is your root cause of your challenge ? And usually it's connected to something that's actually a strength for you . So , kev , for you , give me one strength real quick . I just want to live . Do this A strength of mine . Yeah , don't be bashful . What are you awesome at ?

But I had this moment of like this isn't really a joking matter , Alan , You probably could have , And Tauriel's okay , by the way , all is well .

But I do when I'm uncomfortable , I make jokes And while I think that's hilarious and also good because you don't want to only live in like , I think sometimes it can be really nice when things are rough , to be playful and fun , But sometimes it's a mask to avoid the deeper issues .

And then , on top of that , you also might not be respected , And if you're not respected that'll affect yourself worth .

And I say mitigate because , honestly , is it possible to be super confident Without ever getting lashed out at or being disliked ? is it possible to be super confident and then never have an arrogant moment ? I don't know .

I think if you , if you're super confident and optimistic and you shoot for big things , of course you're gonna get humble pie at times , and So there is a way to be self-aware and humble along the way , but you can't spend your whole life playing not to lose . Sometimes you got to play to win , and I think playing to win is is leaning on your strengths .

Just make sure you're aware of the weaknesses that come with it .

So this person said I've been listening to a lot of Deepak Chopra And I'm , you know , i've read this book . It's like the 50 , no , the 26 things , where he has a letter of the alphabet And there's a word and it connects to something when it comes to abundance . And I was like that sounds cool . He's like what do you think about that ?

And I was like I had a phase where I went through like a heavy spiritual phase where I was listening to Deepak Chopra and Sadguru And I was listening to all of that stuff .

And I said I think it's really good to have a phase like that , especially if it's a weakness , but just make sure That doesn't become your strength to the point where your ability to take action , the real world , becomes a weakness . And I said I don't think that's gonna happen for you because you're like on the very , very end of taking action .

I think this will actually be good for you because it'll balance you out a bit , but just keep an eye on it , because if you take it too far , you're gonna lose that very amazing unique strength you have . That's kind of It's hard right , because the last thing you want to do is Alan's point .

You do you want to mitigate your weaknesses and Strengthen them while maintaining your strengths Really , and that's what I said . I see you just gonna be very careful , because I know a lot of people who are really , really , really , really good at the spiritual side of things .

They know themselves at a deep level , they understand spirituality , they know what their inner child is like , they have all that really really dialed in , but they've spent so much time working on that That they don't really have any external results .

I I also know that , the polar opposite , somebody who has a ton of external results , but when you get behind the scenes you're like , oh okay , there's a lot going on in there .

It's just important to understand what , what strength yours is This person I talked to they need more of that . They need more of the spiritual side , because they are just hyper analytic . That's good for them . If they take it too far , it's not good for them . But if you take the hyper analytic too far , it's probably not good for you either .

I Don't know what the other one is the other , the other two , which is niche .

I have chapters where fitness and health was world-class and then my wealth was not at all . I Have times when my wealth was world-class and my health was not at all , and then I have times when I was healthy and wealthy but I wasn't in love Right , and so it can be really hard .

Not only do you have to know your strengths and mitigate the weaknesses and stay at five and recognize when you're not at five , you also have to do it in all these different categories . It's really quite difficult , and so if you are listening to this show , don't overwhelm yourself with . I have to be healthy , wealthy and in love right now .

Instead , it's a ladder Climb to the next room In health , climb to the next rung in wealth climb to the next rung in love , aka the next level . That's why it's next level . It's not The end level , it's not jump to level 50 . You know , if you're only 24 , don't expect to be on level 50 . You're only 24 , right , and I think that it's unique to you .

It's , but most likely , if you have unique strengths , what you do , you're probably on like Way ahead of the curve in certain areas and probably very behind in a couple others Because of these weaknesses .

And I think that if you identify them I think that's what a lot of what you and I have done honestly since we met Kev is we've kind of Learned what we're really really , really strong in and then what weakness comes with that , and then we've tried to drive to five .

Hmm , and if you think about any arguments you and I have ever had in the past , or healthy debates or passionate discussions , usually it's one of us talking in a strength zone that we did or didn't know we had , or one of us Having weakness that we did or didn't know we had . You know , and Then kind of the discovery process through that yeah .

Yeah , and I think we know ourselves very well compared to what we used to . I saw an email yesterday that was like whoa , it was from four years ago or three years ago . I was like , oh I have , i'm so different now I would never send that same email . It wasn't a bad email , it's just too complex and Complexity was a strength .

Yeah , you know , making things simple is my new mantra , because simple is powerful . You know , it's just fascinating it is .

You have to go through it . You have to go through all the levels to get to the final level , whatever that means . I mean , maybe the level is a little bit quicker , maybe it's a little bit easier , maybe it's a little bit harder . I just thought that was a good analogy for life , because you can't really skip floors .

I'll say it here too I'm grateful for everybody who listens because , again , at one point this was just a dream and it's still weird for me that we're All these episodes in . It just kind of gets weirder .

But if you are looking for your community , if you're looking for a place where you can feel that love , that trust , that safety , please join our private Facebook group . Link is in the show notes .

Okay , at this point we've graduated a hundred people from group coaching . This is group 11 . This is the 11th group You and nine other listeners of this show , who are all gonna be courageous and vulnerable and just show up and Learn . The very group coaching is the very best of all that we've developed . It's the very best .

Six sessions , 90 days , transform your whole life . That's really what it is .

It's an experience with you and others , like minded like , like you , who are gonna support you and respect you , facilitated by us myself , kevin and Jesse Mm-hmm and it's the very best curriculum that we have to date and we've done ten iterations of this , so it is a very well polished product at this point and it's It's insane how much value you you will get

for the money . With the promo code , it comes to only 96 dollars per month . Reach out to Kevin or myself . Click the link in the show notes . All the information is on the landing page at the very bottom There's a little form that type in your first and last name email us , and Alan at nextleveluniversecom .

Kevin at nextleveluniversecom say hey , i want in what's the promo code and we'll sign you up for group 11 .

So we will be talking about that tomorrow . As always , we love you , we appreciate you , grateful for each and every one of you , and I know you . We did not have fans , we have family . We will talk to you all tomorrow .