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Nerd Poker

Each week, under dark of night, in a dining room in Encino, a group of warriors led by Brian Posehn plays Dungeons & Dragons and you’re invited to attend!
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Episodes

Episode 30 - Kakka-Looo

Many choices have led the Ice Five to this small village wedged between cliffs, fireworks about to go off, a lottery about to begin. But what are they willing to sacrifice to meet with the Archmage of Vanzerzale, and will they meet with him at all? A big hand is about to be played. Listen and find out what kind.

Aug 13, 20191 hr 7 minSeason 3Ep. 30

A Brief Message From Us

A brief message from your pals at Nerd Poker. To donate to Therapy Dogs International, check out https://www.tdi-dog.org/Donations.aspx . Thanks nerds!

Aug 12, 20191 min

Episode 29 - Wexhall

First things first, the Ice Five is facing down some gnomish guards that they kinda sorta accidentally picked a fight with. The hope is that they can continue to travel east and locate the Archmage of Vanzervale and get him to explain what happened to the landscape. Probably nothing to it as long as everyone's super persuasive to new friends, right? Oh, right, they're accidentally in a fight with two gnome guards.

Aug 06, 20191 hr 7 minSeason 3Ep. 29

Episode 28 - Pirate Pile On

Quite a fun little pickle the Ice Five have gotten themselves into. Dratlanna's war ship is about to attack the Thixxits, and here's the Time Boat just sitting on the dock. Hey, what's the worst that could happen?

Jul 30, 20191 hr 5 minSeason 3Ep. 28

Episode 27 - Dream Shard

The Ice Five have fought hard for the mysterious artifact they found in the caves. Thing is, they're now expected to hand it over to some mind-flayers, and they're not so sure that this was such a great call in the first place. As they trudge through the snowy hills along the coast it becomes increasingly clear that they made a series of real weird choices. And now you, dear listener, may enjoy the culmination of these choices!

Jul 23, 20191 hr 7 minSeason 3Ep. 27

Episode 26 - Harrowing Hag Havoc

Beneath the mountains along the coastline on a quest to recover an artifact for their friendly mind flayer acquaintances, the Ice Five have vanquished a bulette but still have a terrifying otherworldly hag to deal with. The battle has now raged long enough for them to consider, oh yeah, SHOULD we be helping MIND FLAYERS? Sarah is back and certainly has some thoughts on the last few major choices the Ice Five have made. But they're in deep now, so hopefully everyone will get to keep their brains....

Jul 16, 20191 hr 8 minSeason 3Ep. 26

Episode 25 - Quake Boss

The battle only gets more intense, and the Ice Five realize how even some dangerous mind flayers could to meet their doom down in this cavern. TikTok (aka Boss) does his best to protect Gus (aka Boss) from the bus-sized beast pinballing around the cavern, but there is more than one horror in the deep. Once again Halcyne is driven by the DM, but Sarah will be back soon.

Jul 10, 20191 hrSeason 3Ep. 25

Episode 24 - Braining Men

Our heroes have hit a crossroads: do the Ice Five continue their journey south towards Dame Island and the mysterious Archmage of Vanzervale, or do they stop for a moment and talk to some seemingly not-that-evil mind flayers? In previous campaigns our cast was likely to murder anyone that looks at them funny, so could they possibly want to stop and commiserate with these incredibly creepy brain devourers? Answer: maybe! Sarah could not make it this episode or next, we beg your forgiveness....

Jul 03, 20191 hr 3 minSeason 3Ep. 24

Episode 23 - Unknown Waters

It's been a real tense negotiation with Havoccula, and now the Ice Five hopes to ditch him and come out to the coast to have a few laughs, specifically the coast from the North Sea heading on the outer ridge of the giant comet whirlpool. Their travels could take them past where our first episode found them, only now far down on sea level.

Jun 26, 20191 hr 4 minSeason 3Ep. 23

Episode 22 - Turning Gears

The Ice Five have been negotiating with the corrupted dragon known as Havoccula, and so far they seem to go together like peanut butter and bleach. Of course they'd love to just stab him in his gross face, but he has the habit of flying out of stab range and generally appearing far more powerful than our heroes. Will Halcyne's fiery eyes scare him into submission???

Jun 19, 20191 hr 2 minSeason 3Ep. 22

Bonus Episode - D&D's The Descent Livestream

Hey listeners! We wanted to share the audio of Twitch broadcast at the official Dungeons and Dragons event "The Descent," which was of course hell-themed, and our little story takes place between Season 3's Episodes 14 and 15ish. Plus we've got Engineer Sam Keiffer playing along the whole time as Terry! We played a game on live streaming video! This is of course only the audio, so forgive the sight gags the audio quality that comes with video streaming and the ambient sound of convention attende...

Jun 13, 20191 hr 26 min

Episode 21 - Havoccula

It's been a mad dash back to the Time Boat, and now with the entire Ice Five is converging upon the boat in various states of battle damage. Once they're on board, there's a very special visitor who wants to have a word with our heroes.

Jun 12, 20191 hr 2 minSeason 3Ep. 21

Episode 20 - Evacuation Plan

Sarah is back, and just in time to steer Halcyne out of the airship wreckage with Dr. Uid and TikTok as all three must decide if it's worth waiting for their pal Queep to set down Dargthur and take turngs flying them down to the Time Boat. More drastic measures may be in order. Something seems to be approaching through the storm clouds, something much bigger than an aarakocra carrying his half-drow friend.

Jun 05, 20191 hr 5 minSeason 3Ep. 20

Episode 19 - Dragon Watch

It's time to leave the wreck of the observatory airship, only it's been a little while since the Ice Five visited their pals on the boat, so things might not be exactly the way they were left. No Sarah this episode as she had to call it an early night, but fear not, she'll be back next time in Episode 20!

May 29, 20191 hr 4 minSeason 3Ep. 19

Episode 18 - Baron Wasteland

It's time to explore the main deck of the scientific observatory that turned into an airship, so you better believe our heroes are hungry for loot and answers. As they approach the very spot they stood at Episode 1 of this Cloddenheim adventure, the odds also increase that they'll stumble upon a frustrating gnomish riddle or two.

May 22, 20191 hr 6 minSeason 3Ep. 18

Episode 17 - Icy Mists

The battle concludes, with a half-digested Halcyne in the balance, a frozen sea and an TikTok origin story laying ahead of the party to north. Hey, make sure to listen all the way to the end of the episode for more about our upcoming live Twitch event on May 19th! Also "date paste" is a spicy Skittles ingredient.

May 15, 20191 hr 8 minSeason 3Ep. 17

Episode 16 - Gulp

Chris Tallman returns, and before the great sea monster battle continues, Dan forces the crew to retroactively name their heroic group for the citizens of Boazor so that they may be remembered. But when the action shifts back, things get dire fast. At least there's gigantic boat weapons to play with!

May 08, 20191 hr 11 minSeason 3Ep. 16

Episode 15 - Admiral Ahoy

Our heroes having just interrogated the living heck out of Haushinka's the drow, they now sit upon a throne of clues. Is that a thing we just made up, a throne of clues? We'll have to use that in-game at some point. Anyhow, at long last, nautical backstories draw our heroes towards the sea. And sadly yes, Chris Tallman is missing one more time, but worry not! He is back next episode, we've recorded it and everything, his intense sexual energy will flow through our microphones again before you kn...

May 01, 20191 hr 8 minSeason 3Ep. 15

Episode 14 - Fang Gang

We open on our heroes interrogating Haushinka the drow, and leaving few stones unturned. And not to be undone, Sister Briarlock may have one more surprise to reveal about Dr. Uid, and we're not just talking about that "wild magic" stuff normally reserved for sorcerers. Secrets, secrets, secrets! Sadly we are without Chris Tallman and his intense energy both this episode and next (everyone went on Spring Break vacations this April and his was hardest to work around) but we promise more of him ASA...

Apr 24, 20191 hr 7 minSeason 3Ep. 14

Episode 13 - Lurue

After having instigated a series of mercenary bribes gone sour, our heroes have a few loose ends to tie up (stab) before they can move on. And if they can, there is a certain temple to visit, and a certain drow friend their who may have regained her faculties by now.

Apr 17, 20191 hr 8 minSeason 3Ep. 13

Episode 12 - Golden Stratagem

A despot deposed, our heroes struggle with their newfound responsibility, including whether they should share their newfound glory with the local dregs under Thoggis' employ. TikTok soul-searches himself, and others.

Apr 10, 20191 hr 4 minSeason 3Ep. 12

Episode 11 - Thoggis

The most epic battle yet unfolds, and our heroes discover that they have stumbled into the lair of something far more sinister (and gross) than they had originally anticipated. Only luck will allow them to escape with their lives. Sadly Blaine missed out on this episode, but don't worry, he's fine and will be back next episode!

Apr 03, 20191 hr 10 minSeason 3Ep. 11

Episode 10 - Hall Raid

A plan is hatched to free the city of Boazor, but funny thing about plans. There is sneaking in the night. Blood is spilled. And, at the end of the episode, Boazor's biggest secret may be revealed.

Mar 27, 20191 hr 5 minSeason 3Ep. 10

Episode 9 - Execution O'Clock

Having sent Thoggis a message and declared their opposition to his rule over Boazor, the heroes hide in the alleys contemplating their next move. Everyone could use a rest, but can they find a safe haven after curfew? The quest for a Free Boazor continues.

Mar 20, 20191 hr 6 minSeason 3Ep. 9

Episode 8 - Dugthukked

Dargthur's drinking celebration rained upon, our heroes continue to unleash on Dugthuk the tithe-collecting troll. Queep tests his durability. Halcyne achieves a moral victory. Dr. Uid whips it. TikTok scolds.

Mar 13, 20191 hr 5 minSeason 3Ep. 8

Episode 7 - Keg of Whispers

As the crew prepares to breathe the seaside air, they struggle with another one of Dan's damned puzzles. On the other side of a stone door lies Boazar, the home of Dargthur Sturry and his seaside pals, and perhaps oddest of all CIVILIZATION, something that Nerd Poker has had sparse amounts of in the past. Will the citizens all be named after extras in Aquaman? MAYBE.

Mar 06, 20191 hr 5 minSeason 3Ep. 7

Episode 6 - Spelunking Bird

Despite not knowing how to speak the language on all the subterranean signs, the party must make some important travel choices as they continue to head west. Luckily they do have many tools at their disposal, like premonitions from a storm god. Also, and this is just a rumor, but it seems that Ken might be a bird.

Feb 27, 20191 hr 4 minSeason 3Ep. 6

Episode 5 - Haushinka

The party continues their bloody battle with the creatures at the icy bend in the path. They seem to be reaching the end of the dwarven city, but even then it is a long road ahead. And sooner or later they're bound to meet another underground traveler... right?

Feb 20, 20191 hrSeason 3Ep. 5

Episode 4 - Frosty Precipice

Deep in the abandoned dwarven city of Brufvt, our heroes are forced into an icy confrontation. The party gets to know each other better through sourness, battlecries, and madness-inducing flame blades. And don't worry, we haven't forgotten to make Engineer Sam do his recap.

Feb 13, 201958 minSeason 3Ep. 4

Episode 3 - Tunnel Tenure

Dargthur, the latest goth character creation by Brian Posehn, has helped the party discover a tunnel that they hope will take them to the civilization of the western port city of Boazor. But entering the tunnel isn't as easy as cracking open a dungeoneering kit. There are prices to pay and NPCs to be insulted by.

Feb 06, 20191 hr 3 minSeason 3Ep. 3
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