Beth and Michael talk about car charging rage is the new road rage, and how the hell is infrastructure ever going to keep up with charging demand? How did the people in charge not see this coming? They explore the pleasures of scarcity, musical tastes as core to ones identity, Marvel movies. Should extinction rebellion be protesting corporations or the the protestors' peers? Beth fails again to keep Star Wars out of the conversation. They discuss fashion designer Jeff Garner, sustainable shoppin...
Oct 05, 2023•56 min•Ep. 21
Beth and Michael guess which of their two Norwegian Forest Cats is leaving sick on the floor. Portland, Oregon is a dystopia, yet still manages to remain environmentally friendly. Beth and Michael can't be bothered to put any effort into holidays, birthdays, or anniversaries. Their 25th anniversary is tomorrow (Michael did the math). They will make extra fancy cappuccinos. Beth just realized as she is typing this that they are out of milk. New banned word announced.
Oct 02, 2023•56 min•Ep. 20
Beth and Michael consider the one thing you need to create your own island paradise in the Netherlands. Beth is still sick. Michael mentions the UK's version of Frank Sinatra. Michael is experimenting with the mix. New banned words added to the podcast banned words list. It sounds a little muddy to Beth. What do you think?
Oct 01, 2023•31 min•Ep. 19
Michael (aka Miks, pronounced "meeks" or "mieks" if you are Dutch) plays any song in the style of anyone in any key. He's taking requests. A glimpse into Michael's brain as he is working out a piece of music, and other glimpses into Michael's brain. A glimpse into Beth's life--what it is like to live with someone who is good at everything. Beth and Michael talk about Jools Holland's father in law, elementary school breakfast, lunches, canned pasta, and snack cake brands of the '70s and '80s. The...
Sep 26, 2023•1 hr 10 min•Ep. 18
The world is terrible and puts terrible, albeit it hilarious, images in Beth's head. Don't eat farmed salmon. In fact, everyone should just not eat anything or breathe anything and we should all just stand there motionless for the foreseeable future. Beth also has procured some "main pants." NASA does another amazing thing while the BBC does not. New banned word added to the words banned on the Rock 'n' Roll Porter podcast. Producer Jack Kerouac shows up to work all schmutzy.
Sep 25, 2023•30 min•Ep. 17
Beth is steaming mad about the coffee economy overrunning coffee culture. Carl Hiaasen books are cathartic. A new word is added to the list of banned words for the Rock 'n' Roll Porter podcast.
Sep 24, 2023•30 min•Ep. 16
Beth compares her illness to the suffering of American soldiers in winter-time Bastogne during WWII. Beth dislikes mysteries because she dislikes the word "mystery." Michael doesn't care much for fiction but has a hard time not droning on about Tolkien. Beth often defiantly and confidently says or writes the wrong thing. Michael lets embarrassment of her own making rain down on her for a good long while before drying her off with the truth.
Sep 23, 2023•35 min•Ep. 15
Beth and Michael discuss when bullied boys become world leaders, Russell Brand, Youtube, Marilyn Manson, Camille Paglia, believing women, listening to women, getting women into power positions, and what happens next. Michael finds a way to bring up Star Wars. Beth announces the first words banned from being used on this podcast due to overuse.
Sep 22, 2023•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 14
Beth and Michael discuss a young girl knowing her worth (inflation and babysitting price fixing comes into play), Michael bundling something he likes to do with something he doesn't like to do, grammar, and how Michael's sleepwear must be ADHD approved.
Sep 22, 2023•29 min•Ep. 13
Beth and Michael worked too hard at a festival. Michael has a cold. Beth feels disassociated. Beth and Michael call into question the ethics of festivals when it comes to waste. They criticize the latest Apple campaign and can't seem to stop referring to any phenomena that happened before Y2K. Michael doesn't need headphones. He refers to Beth's ADHD as "your personality type."
Sep 17, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Ep. 12
Beth and Michael talk about banning balloons rather than nitrous oxide. They dive deep into '70s and '80s serial TV and spinoffs, who's alive, who's dead, and who's racist. Beth wants the Epstein list. Beth is tired and grumpy.
Sep 17, 2023•28 min•Ep. 11
Beth blames her low tolerance of shrill women on her ADHD. Beth and Michael continue to explore how to be good podcasters. Growing and cutting your hair for rich woman to wear on their own heads is not a first-choice career path. Neither is renting out your womb or vagina.
Sep 17, 2023•29 min•Ep. 10
Beth has missed Michael's birthday twice. She is panicked about being expected to roll off LGBTQABC123+. Michael wishes it was called "Not Ashamed" parade which makes Beth annoyed. Michael thinks beauty products are made from milk and vaseline. Beth and Michael learn the history of shampoo and conditioner and it is not what or when you would think.
Sep 17, 2023•53 min•Ep. 9
Beth and Michael talk about female bassists in rock bands. Why playing the guitar is hard. Generational golf shirts in the Midwest. Michael's rules for clothes shopping and clothes wearing include not showing up in his dog-walking shoes when meeting someone for the first time. Michael continues to teach Beth the absolute basics of audio engineering.
Sep 17, 2023•39 min•Ep. 8
Premier conversation with brilliant, funny, wonderful, velvet-voice guest co-host Yvonne de Jager. Yvonne will be a frequent co-host where she and Beth talk about the differences between Dutch and American culture, and all the random stuff we talk about anyway. Beth remembers when she showed up to a surprise party not knowing who the party was for. They discuss why this podcast is so necessary. Beth confesses that she has the opposite of imposter syndrome. Beth tells the only joke she ever made ...
Sep 17, 2023•49 min•Ep. 7
Michael explains to Beth the difference between a tavern, an inn, and an ale house which he learned from watching Jason Kingsley. They remember how the ubiquitous misspelling of "medieval" thrust English professors off the rails. Beth lays out her fascination with "secondary cities" in America and the destabilization of the west coast. Beth and Michael discuss the health and fitness of their pets, and purpose built theaters for music, comedy, and plays.
Sep 17, 2023•18 min•Ep. 6
Michael works on the podcast's theme song. Beth does not owe Michael an apology. Going barefoot is good for you. Michael thinks running a marathon is pointless and stupid, but attaching a jet engine to a car for no reason is not. Nor is Star Wars pointless and stupid, according to Michael. Beth recalls winning a multiplication tables competition in the 4th grade, prize was a hot fudge sundae. Beth reflects on, and grieves for, Sinead O'Connor.
Sep 17, 2023•48 min•Ep. 5
Comedy used to be cooler. Michael gives Beth a legal lesson on genericide. Mitch McConnell short circuits.
Sep 17, 2023•35 min•Ep. 4
Michael and Beth talk about learning how to do podcasts on the job, aliens, and winners with muddy faces. This image was generated by Microsoft Designer with the prompt "make an alien version of Beth Massa.
Sep 17, 2023•33 min•Ep. 3
Beth and Michael reminisce about how they met: Michael crossing the street to avoid Beth (or anyone) and Beth's inability to read social cues ending up by default in a life long relationship. They discuss the merits of cover bands, music criticism, cosmetic procedures, and the women's movement of the '60s and '70s.
Jul 24, 2023•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 2
Michael speaks the incomprehensible language of audio engineering and deep dives into the 25-year history of his pantsjamas. Beth remembers how to work the gear by rote. Beth needs to get the sibilance out of her Ss. Eavesdrop on how we talk to each other in real life.
Jul 23, 2023•37 min•Ep. 1
