Thanks to this season's presenting sponsor, Driskulls, only the finest berries. Hello young chefs! And welcome back to Mystery Recipe! Chad here with a little bit of sad news today. Unfortunately, we aren't going to be making any more episodes of Mystery Recipe. I am so disappointed about this because making this show is so incredibly fun, but everything has to end sometime. And so, instead of focusing on some of those sad feelings that we might be having about the show being over,
I was hoping we could take some time to celebrate together instead. We were able to make six seasons of fun, fantastical food content, and spend three years growing as chefs and as people together. How amazing is that! I wanted to put together one last episode that had some of my all-time favorite segments in it. So, I hope you enjoyed this collection of the weird, wacky, and wonderful side of food.
And thank you for listening! Thank you for writing reviews! Thank you for sending us emails! Thank you for making Halloween costumes and puppets and doing experiments with us! Thank you for being curious cooks and excited eaters! And thank you for getting to know Mitsu, Molly, and me! We love you! And we cannot wait to see what you're going to bake next. Oh, and until next time, keep on cooking! So many great artists! So many classic hits! It's hard to believe they're all in one collection.
Breadrock! 12 beautiful CDs! Imagine there's no gluten! It means your dough won't rise, CO2! Almost 300 of the hits you love! It's breadrock! A collection of the greatest bread songs ever recorded! No one knows what it's like to be a loaf pan! A non-stick loaf pan! A nine by five! Breadrock is not sold in any store! And it seems to me that you ate this loaf, Couser's crumbs left in the tin! To order, just wish really hard, but don't hold your breath!
Not a real album, not actually available anywhere! You can't buy this album because it isn't real, it's all just a joke! And we're crispy with bread and mixing the cream, and we're gonna make big big chill cold in breadrock! Breadrock! Knock knock, Mitt Romney here! Mitt Romney? Dad? Mittsy! Your dad is Mitt Romney? Not like the Mitt Romney, it's actually a very common name for oven mitts! I, Mittsy, surprise! I signed up to take the tour of the office with you! Your special guest?
I am! I figured you might get nervous if you knew ahead of time that I was coming! Oh well, it's good to see you, dad! Thanks for coming to support my side hustle! It looks like today is just gonna be you, me, and Maggie here on the tour! Actually, since the episode is about over, I'd love to join too, Mittsy! Really? Of course! But you know this office pretty well by now, Wally! I know, but it would be great to hear about it from your perspective, Mittsy!
Yeah! The nicest, all right friends! Let's get going! We're going to start in the general kitchen, which is just down the hall here! Okay, cool! I'm just gonna use my white cane for the walk over there! Oh, how rude of me! Do you need any help? Oh, no thank you! I'm fine! No, please, I insist! Here, let me help guide you down the hallway! I'm fine! Really? Oh no, I won't take no for an answer! That's all right! I understand that you're coming from a kind place, but I really do not need help!
Yeah, dad, Maggie has been blind for most of her life! She knows how to get around! No problem! Oh, oh goodness! I'm sorry! It's okay! Like I said, I know you were just trying to be nice! Don't worry about it! But I get myself to work every day! I know what I'm doing! It's actually really important to remember to ask if someone needs your help before you help them, regardless of whether they are disabled or not. And if they say that they don't need help, you should believe them!
That's true, Maggie. Helping people is a great thing, and if someone needs help, it is kind to stop and help them. But we don't want to assume someone needs help just because they are disabled. And we definitely don't want to touch someone or start helping them without asking for their permission first! It'll be much easier for me to get down this hallway by myself than it would be for you to try and help me! I got it! Thanks for taking the time to explain that to me!
No problem, Mitt! Well, should we begin the tour? Actually, before we do, maybe we can finish up this episode first? Ah, good idea, Molly. Another day? Another crime to solve. It's a hard beat out here for an egg, but somebody's got to get to the oak of things. I was headed back to the office to get my hat and go. That ends another day of cracking cases. Pepeca, hold my calls. Oh, Detective Honday's saying! Oh, and who might you be? Another crime, Dame. They always show up at quitting time.
There's a quill I get to see you. I can see that, Pepeca. Thank you. Please, call me, dot. What can I do for you, dot? Oh, I didn't know where to go. See, I need your help, Detective. Yeah, take a tissue and tell me what's going on. I don't know why he's always up on that wall to begin with. It's my husband, Humpty. Humpty? Humpty, Dumpty? Yes, I'm afraid he's had a great fall, you see. Yes, yes. Humpty and I go way back. Tell me everything. What do I need to spell it out for you?
Nope, I think I've got it. H, U, M. All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't help me. I didn't know where else to turn, Detective. All the King's men may be. But this is a job for an egg, sweetheart. I'm on it, dot. Don't you worry. I've seen it all by now. Poached and fried, eggs that got the devil in them. But this Humpty fella, he just didn't sit right with me. Didn't sit right with anyone. Just did not sit right, I mean. He kept toppling over one way or the other.
And always on the same stretch of wall outside town. Get out of your horses. What are you even doing here trying to put me back together? Save it for somebody with thumbs. Humpty, you old fool. Detective, all in days. Thank goodness you're here. Listen, I'm in a bit of a pickle. I've heard. Lucky for you. I know my way around the puzzle. I knew I had to put them back together. Even though I know this time tomorrow there's a good chance he'd be right up on that wall again.
All the King's horses and all the King's men would be getting another call. You know how the story goes. But I'm a hard-boiled detective and serving my community. That's what it's all about. Plus, I couldn't stand to see that quail egg back in my office. I was almost out of tissues. There you go. Good as new. Not sure where this piece went, but... Detective, all in days. Thank you. I really thought I was scrambled for good. You gotta do us all a favor and stay off this wall, Humpty.
You know that dot she worries about you. And I do too, buddy. I don't want to see you falling to pieces anymore. You're right, Detective. That's it. I'm turning over a new leaf. Going to go back to the nest and really settle down, I think. Thank you, Detective. Thank you. They don't call me hard-boiled for nothing. It's all in a day's work. Since we have a stage, you will all be graced with a special performance of my one-of-a-knit show entitled The Desert Island.
I didn't know you had a solo show up your sleeve, Mythy. I have no sleeves, Molly, but yes, I have lights. Mythy, this is all very impressive, but this is a podcast. No one will see the light queues. I know. That's why I'm saying them out loud. I don't remember much. The pilot clicked on the fesson seat belt side. All I remember after that is darkness. And then the sound of waves, the grains of sand beneath my mitt. They were in my mouth. I coughed up sea water and slowly opened my eyes.
Lights up! It took some time for my eyes to adjust, but they did. They always do. Like Q3, go! The lights are getting dimmer here. If you want to imagine that. I blinked. I could finally see where I had landed. And where I had landed was unlike anything I'd ever seen before. I was on an island, stranded alone. Nothing but ocean for as far as the I could see. But there was something strange about this island. I looked down at my little pink feet in the sand. At least I thought it was sand.
I realized though that I could still taste it in my mouth. It tasted sweet. I took a handful of it and bravely took a bite. Yes, just as I had suspected it was. Graham, Karekka, Karembal. Oh, gasp! What's that? It's like a sweet buttery cookie crust you can use for pies and stuff. Oh, yum! Oh, yum indeed! I looked around the island. Everything here was, oh yum! There were giant licorice trees with big, shaved chocolate palm flams. Little gummy bears chased each other from tree top to tree top.
I see a hot fudge waterfall behind them that flows over candy rocks with pancake lily pads and empties into a pool of hot bubbling chocolate. Here I am, drapped on desert island. At first, I'm in paradise, munching happily all day, frallicking with gummy bears and swimming in the hot fudge pools. But I quickly realize that all there is here is desert. My body starts to crave something savoury. I need meat, I need a cheeseburger. Cheese, bread, anything that's not sugar.
Oh, quickly this island changes for me. Gasp! Nitsy, I really like... feel afraid for you right now. Oh, don't worry Parker, it's all acting, but also thank you. I am really feeling it, you know? I get really invested in the character. So anyway, it's days of sweet, and the sugar starts to go straight to my head. I'm getting... I can't stop laughing. I laugh until I cry, and I cry until I start laughing again.
In a fit of sugar crazed joy, I dip my hand in a pool of jam and grab onto a marshmallow I've been using as a pillow. The red hand print I left behind almost seems to smile at me, so I draw a little face onto it. Mellow then becomes my only friend on desert island. This is starting to sound a little bit like the movie Cast Away. Which premiered three years after my run at Cotton Fringe, so do the math on that one, Tom Hanks.
Not to interrupt, Mitzi, but it looks like my second batch of pancakes is about done. Don't worry if you're ahead or behind of us listeners, we're all moving in our own pace here. Sorry, Mitzi, back to your show. Okay. One day, I woke up and knew I had to find my own escape. No one was coming to save me. I tear down the liquorice trees and use shoelace candies to fashion myself a boat after having spent hours on desert island. Only hours.
I take my destiny into my own hands and push off back into the merciless ocean. And on the raft I sat. That night, after a mellow and I were up talking for hours and hours, we get into a heated argument. In a fit of rage, I hurl mellow into the ocean and regret it immediately. He bods slowly away from me and I scream into the night. Only to hear my distant echo as a lonely response. Once again, I was alone with the ocean. I cry and cry for what might have been days or minutes.
Until just when I'm in my deepest pit of despair, I hear it. Oh, my rescue, I look up at sea mellow at the edge of a great ship. He had come back for me after all. Mellow! They pull me aboard. All thanks to that marshmallow. And... Jam. Blackout! All right, welcome back to the cheese seller, everybody. Thanks for being here. Thanks for being here. It's going to be a good night for you. We've got some pretty cheesy jokes lined up so you can laugh your lines off.
First up, it's everybody's favorite cow. Let's give it up for Bessie. Hello everybody. Hi, hi, hi. Thank you. So great to be here at the cheese seller tonight. You know, it's almost like this place couldn't even exist without me. So... You're welcome. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm glad to be here, honestly. Honestly, I wasn't sure I was going to be able to make it. I had a real tough case of hey fever just before this show. Hey fever, yeah. Thankfully, I recovered in time to catch my flight out here.
You know, flying as a cow is really tough. Try jumping over the moon. Guess that's not how it really works. And adapt at LAX with everyone else. It's not easy. Getting around the airport is just a nightmare. I mean, my cowbells sit off the metal detector every time. And then the men in someone spots my spots, then they just want me to move. If you ever see a cow in an airport, please don't ask them to move. They're just trying to find their gate. Cheese. I really ain't flying though.
I'm more of a ground beef. The turbulence always makes me so nervous. Causes balance for everyone else too. Because my milk shakes. And that always brings all the boys to the yard. My daughter flew out here with me. Yeah. Her favorite part of the airport? The calf material. Of course. Flying with kids is tough. But flying with a calf don't get me started. It's an utter nightmare. The flight attendant asked me if I wanted to go to the airport.
The flight attendant asked me if I wanted my coffee decaf. And I just started crying. I wish. Oh my gosh. You know, I am so glad I came though. Because you all are a great crowd tonight. I always ask myself why I do it. It's not for the money. You'll have to tell you that. My agent always milks me dry. All right. That's my set. Good night, everybody. Move! That move! Bestie, everybody. Thank you, Bestie. Put the cow in Holy Cow, huh, ladies and gentlemen? All right. That's our show. Goodbye.
Saltis ev'ryle. Salt your problems. You're welcome! Hello and welcome back folks. It's time for salty Sarah soaps your problems. The Colin radio show where I saw your problems. And try not to be too salty while I do it. We have a first caller here. What's your problem, friend? Hi, Sarah. Do you think she can help me with a problem? Oh, yeah. That's the whole deal here. Get on with it already. Okay, sorry. Last week I took up the garbage and my mom gave me a bag of salt. That is salty.
A few days ago, after its snowed, I shoveled the driveway. And it was the same thing with my dad. For salt. Extra salt, yeah, I love it. This week I asked for a raise in my allowance. And they gave me another half bag of salt. What's going on? So much salt must be great to be you. All right, friend. Tough problem. But salty Sarah has gotten answer for you. Sounds to me like your parents are taking a page out of an ancient Roman book.
In Roman times, soldiers working for the empire were paid in salt instead of money. Carp? Did I study? How about letting me finish? I'll explain it. I'm the professional here after all. Calm down Sarah. Don't get salty. Don't get salty. Back then, you see, it was a lot harder to mine salt. There were no refrigerators either and people needed salt to preserve their food. So when they worked hard and did a good job, they were paid with salt. People even used to call it white gold.
Here's an extra fat for you. Because I'm so nice. Their monthly salt salary was called a salarium. In Latin, sal means salt. Salarium in Latin became salery in French and eventually salery in English. So you see, the word salery evolved from the word salt. Your parents are just paying your salary. Okay. Thank you. Now, can you help me get actual money from my parents instead? Only one problem per customer kid. Figure it out. Goodbye. Alright folks, salty Sarah solves it again.
That's it. Good night. Thank you and you're welcome. Salti Sarah solves your problems. You're welcome. Ooh, that's salty. How does this green shoot white root kind of an allium-bring value? Dropped in the middle of a boiling pot of ramen noodles or with cooked rice, it sounds nice, but is it? What is this thing and what can I cook with it? They're one dollar, maybe less if you can butter in the last longer, but you got a chop smarter by saving the white bottom and putting it in water.
It grows back. That's right. This vegetable's a tool. Piotr. Well, the word got around. They said this plant is insane. Man took them to a garden and they learned to grow them by hand. Put them in a pot. My house planted the world got to grow this plant. What's your name man? Alexander the Scallion. My name is Alexander the Scallion. And there's a million things to use me in. Put me on your plate. On your plate.
When he gets back from the store you wanna use it in our pinch, it's a cooking onion. Really there's nothing to a chop thing. Trim it real quick. The trick. Leave the white part with the roots about two to three inches. Put it in a jar with the jar into a sunny place. Wipe out the water every day. It's easy to replace the white part. No, it's gotta grow or else. And pretty soon this plant starts to regrow itself. Alexander the Scallion. We wanna put you on our food. We might cut you back down.
But you will be grow up out two times. Oh Alexander the Scallion. Alexander the Scallion. Hello fresh things for you. Finish the plate like it's a dream. With the classy sprinkle of green arugula. We'll never be the same old. Part is in a skillet now. You can hear it go away. The green part waiting to make a dish better looking. The onion looking super mac and cheese no longer booking. We made rice with him. I made soup with him. She stir fried with him. Me. I loved him. And me.
I had to make Scallion pancakes. There's a million things to use in man. Put them on your plate. What's your name man? Alexander the Scallion. Hi grown ups. I wanted to tell you a little bit about our newsletter. If you love the fun food content we share on mystery recipe, then sign up today for our ATK Kids newsletter to receive even more recipes, activities, and stories from me, straight to your inbox. As a mom of two, I always try to include things that are important to my family.
And it's a great way to hear about all the new things we are cooking up at ATK. Plus, every new email added will be entered for a chance to win three free ATK kids books for toddlers through teens. We'll draw 10 winners every month while the promotion lasts. And we have some great books available all the time. Head to ATKKids.com slash newsletter to sign up today for your chance to win. Mystery recipe.