Oasis II, Rapture & A Fridge

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Hello and welcome to My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, Vogue Williams and Joanne McNally. I'm ready. I put my fish away. I'm ready to chat. Put your goddamn fish away. I kind of really want fish now. I'm starving. I've just landed. From Birmingham. Okay. I'm a Jatshader. Someone just mailed me actually. I've lost the mail and they said they saw you at Birmingham Airport and they were talking to you about my tan. Did that happen? Yes! I just saw a mail there. I've lost it now. Yeah!

So hello to that person, I'm sorry. Yeah, she said to me, so I was queuing, as you do, to get on planes, because that's how you get on planes. And... She was like cabin crew. She was kind of checking us in and she came up to me. She was kind of looking at me and then she came up to me and she goes, you're the podcast woman. And I said, yeah, that is who I am.

Guilty. Yeah, guilty as charged. I'm the only podcast woman there is. Absolutely. And then she said, I love Vogue's tan. And I was like, ah. Yeah. I do personally believe it is the best hand on the market. And I do believe that. I've said that to you. Privately and publicly. And she was very aware of your name. I was a little more mysterious to her. But she knew I was involved with you in some capacity. And then she said that she loves your town so much.

That she used to get it like flown in from, I don't know, someone was like mewling it like a drug mule. I don't know what they...

throwing it into a condom and putting it up themselves to get it to the UK before you sold it in the UK. And she said they used to sell it on Aer Linga Spice. Anyway, she was tan. Mad. People, do you know, and people are so loyal to Tan. I think they're more loyal to Tan than some people are to their own husbands. Tan is very important. And do you know what she said, folk? She said, she's an ultra dark. And I said, I am too, although...

I said, Vogue doesn't like that. Vogue says I'm a medium gal, but I said, I too am committed to the ultra dark. Yes, we had a great chat. Almost missed the flight. I was like, oh shit. Then I realised that everyone was on the plane, so I had to lag him. But yeah, we had a lovely chat.

Why Birmingham? What happened there? Why were you in Birmingham? I was in the Hippodrome the night before doing a show. Oh, I... Oh my... So you did two Apollos in the Hippodrome? I just love to get to Birmingham once a week. You know me, folk. I do love a bit of Birmingham now, I have to say. And they have a Marks and Spencer in that airport for snacks. Hiya, Bab. And can I say, the audience, so the tour is up and running at the moment. And...

I've never done the Hippodron before. Garoud tells me I have. I was like, Garoud, I haven't done it before. This is our regular argument. It's terrible that I would veer on the side of Garoud, but okay, okay. I was like, I haven't. Prosecco wouldn't have sold the Hippodram.

It wouldn't have. I don't know. You're just not a brilliant source when it comes to where you were. My own stories, I know, yeah. You're not, yeah. But anyway, can I say it was a Sunday evening. It was one of the nicest gigs we've ever done. Why do they call it the hippodrome? Because there's hippodromes everywhere.

And for some reason I'm like, I thought it was a bingo hall, but it's not a bingo hall. I know, I did. It was a bingo hall. It was a bingo hall. Is it? People are mad for bingo. Spinning baskets. Legs 11, legs 11. I was about to say what do you shout at the end when you win but you shout bingo you shout bingo it's all ahead of us folk it's all ahead of us that's what we will be doing I can't wait to hit my bingo stage I'll be playing that game what's it called

Not Bridge, there's another one that my auntie loves as well. There's another game that lasts for hours. Bridge is very kind of female-centric, I think. One of my friends... learned how to play bridge and she's in her well she's in her 40s now but she learned it in her 30s and we were like wow this is like this is nursing home vibes she's like no no I love it but the problem with bridge is you need a partner you have to have someone to play with

It's hours long. You won't do that, though, because you won't share the board. You won't win. I want to win. No, there's another game that I've only played called Mangies or something like that. I don't know. Obviously, it's not called that, but it's a really difficult game to play. And that's what they're on to now. So Bridge has taken a little bit of a backseat and they're on to that other game. I don't know if somebody will know.

the name of it and I'm not saying it right now. It's like Monji or something. I don't remember what it's called. I'd have to ring the name. Never. This sounds like, is this one of your posh things? Is this one of your St. Bortz games? No, it's actually, that's backgammon. That's backgammon. No, no, no. Gavin isn't posh. Is it not? Chance is posh. For my 50th birthday, I'd like to set up a giant kind of experiential sized kerplunk. Oh, I like Kerplung. Do you know what's not great? The buckaroo.

I got Bookaroo for the kids and I was like, I remember this being much better. And Operation. Do you know how small they've made? No, no, no. They've made them so small that I can't even do it. Yeah. What? Yeah. Don't bother. Don't waste your money. Just a teeny tiny pancreas.

You're taken out with the tweezers. Great crack though. And also I think an important educational tool for future doctors. Absolutely. We've spoken before about them leaving sponges and stuff inside people. It does happen. So maybe if they were doing more operation in their spare time.

as a game, they wouldn't make mistakes like that. Possibly. And so come here to me. Guess what I did on Saturday night? Well, you know, I went to Oasis last time. I don't know what happens at Oasis. A lot of drinks happen. And I kind of started giving myself the fear yesterday. But my friends, what? Can I ask a question? Yeah. Did they come out holding hands or not holding hands?

They hugged. They're friends. I'm telling you, they're friends. Well, someone told me there was one gig that they didn't come out holding hands. And I was like, ooh, spicy. Well, we don't know. We never held hands. You and I. The only little time is at the end. I think we, like, we publicly get on. I mean, privately, it's carnage. Privately, can't bear each other. Privately, there's been stabbing and glassing galore. But publicly, the official line is...

We like each other. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the best way to have it. But they're infamously like... at each other's throats so I think the holding hands thing was to prove to make us feel comfortable that they are in a togetherness situation like that they're back in love so when they don't hold hands coming out it makes people it unsettles people it's jarring we're like oh my god are they not talking what's going on

They didn't just hold hands. They actually hugged. Scored. And they had. Yeah. They did. I did. I saw them. I saw them. Did they score? Who's the top? Who's the bottom? Just a little. Joanne, there was only a little hand job, that's all. Right? Just as quickie. I did a real quick one. Liam's definitely the top. Liam's the top. Oh, God. And do you know what? My love for Liam, it grows stronger and stronger every single day. Listen.

I don't, whatever. You're not having him. If you ever get the chance and you do that to me, I don't give a shit if I'm married. I'll never forgive you. He's going out with someone. I know, but like just in case something ever happens. And we have established that the... that the more that men get to know me, the less they fancy me. Ah, no, I'd say he'd be into you now, so that's why it'd be a bit of a concern for me. I'd be more upset if you went with Liam than if you went with Spenno.

That's how upset I'd be. Imagine you're trying to cock block me off, Liam Gallagher. You are... I just did. Oh. Friendship would be... Wow. That has been a love of mine since I was 12. Okay, back off, Joanne McNally. Take null, right? Take null. He doesn't want me anyway. I should have wrote Spencer instead and you're like, oh, whatever. As long as it's not, listen, don't worry about it. As long as it's not Liam, that is totally fine. Are you texting Liam?

No, I'm riding your husband. Oh, Grant. We share. We share things. You're like, if anything, take a shift off me. Fucking delighted. I'll do the mornings. So my algorithm was popping off or whatever the way it was. And a video came up of Oasis when they were...

like kind of at the start of their career. So I guess they were in their 20s. They were probably even younger, Jo. I say, I asked, I bring Jo's name into it when I need to be. Well, it's 20 years since they broke up, isn't it? So it's 20 years since they broke up and I don't think they were going together. that long before they absolutely despised each other.

Noel's 58 and they started banging around in the middle of the 90s, didn't they? So he would have been, in his late 20s, he would have been 28 and 95. Well, when I say he was, I think because I was a little, I'm a little younger than the lads. So I remember liking them, but I don't remember ever fancying them, if you know what I mean. Oh, God. This video turned up with the two of them chatting and Liam, in fairness to him, he was a knockout.

I think he's better looking now. Honestly, I do. I used to have him and Eric Cantona on my wall and that's who I used to kiss goodnight. I remember it was when I had a single bed sleeping beside Amber. I must have been, honestly, I must have been about 11. I don't even think I'd, I hadn't gone to secondary school yet.

and I was kissing his like I've always liked a bad boy as you know yourself what was wrong with me do you know who I had my poster was Neil Buchanan no Douglas something, he was in a film called Crazy People Dudley Moore Dudley Moore! Dudley Moore. Dudley Moore was who I asked. Don't cut that out. That's humiliating, even for me. Dudley Moore was the poster on my bedroom wall. Dudley Moore.

Yeah, yeah. And then I got really paranoid as a child. I remember asking my mum to remove the post. I think I loved the film Crazy People. I mean, why I had access to that, I've no idea. Bad parenting, Pat should be arrested. I thought his eyes were following me around the room then and mum had to come in and take the poster down. And it's the same with the China doll. Quite a paranoid child, I would say. But yeah, my crush was Dudley Moore. I mean, what's that about?

It's weird. I actually, when you think of it, I actually had quite good taste because Eric Cantona also arrived. Like he's still good looking. Even now he's good looking. Did you see your one wearing the bikini made out of Roy Keane's face? No, I love Roy Keane too. Well I'll tell you this much for such a cantankerous bastard he gets a lot of attention.

He's very funny, though. Because he's a moany hole, but in a good way. Do you know what I mean? He's an absolute moan, but he prides himself on it and everyone finds it attractive, as do I. Hello and welcome to my... Sorry, I forgot. Oh, no. I was on Oasis and Jo, you said the same thing. I don't know what it is. It's my second time going. I'd go again if I could. But like, you do tend to get pretty pissed at Oasis, don't you?

And then the next day. It's a when in Rome thing, isn't it? It's just sort of... It's just the boss. What was the 90s about? It's a night ace. I know, but... still you know what i'm like the next day so i was like oh god i was like to clode and ashley were we okay and they were like no we were actually totally fine and because we went to that friends and family bar any sign of richard ashcroft no

God, isn't he good? I went and watched it. So the girls flew in from Dublin and I was like, I was thinking to myself, I was like, no, I'm not waiting for them. Like I'm not missing Richard Ashcroft because I only saw his last song the last time I went. So off I went, stood on my own and this woman came over and she's like, are you all right? And I was like...

yeah no my friends are coming no I have my friends they are coming so basically Liam said we'll see you next year so that means that they're going to do Nebworth and I don't know where they would like where would they go in Ireland because they've already done the biggest venue in Ireland but surely they'll do Another, like maybe they'll do Crow Park again. I'm going. Or maybe Slane. Slane. They'll do Slane. With the same, with the same, like the same tour, I guess. I'd go 10 more times.

I remember I went to Slane. Who are we going to see? We were going to see you two when we were really young. I think we were like 16. We'd snuck down and we got absolutely deranged. And one of my friends fell into a bush of nettles. You know the way it goes all lumpy? And her whole face was just lumps. She was bawling, crying because she just had all these nettle, scratchy lumps all over her face. I'll never forget that. Sounds awful. So I will be back, Slane. God love her.

Okay, we spoke about this the other day, but we're going to tell you again because it really is such an amazing cause. And we've never done a competition on the podcast, but here it is. The prize is Chuan McNally.

Two tickets to Pinafoyle and you can come backstage after and have a drink with myself in Vogue. You're going to get a night in a hotel near the Eventim Apollo and we're going to throw in 150 quid cash towards your travel costs. And as well as that, we have a ghosted merch bundle for you.

also a copy of Big Mouth. The competition is to help raise money for Global's Make Some Noise which funds vital life-changing projects across the UK delivered by small local charities with the aim of making sure nobody is left facing life's toughest challenges alone. Projects tackle a wide range of issues including bereavement, food poverty, domestic abuse, homelessness and loneliness. Some amazing causes and brilliant work.

So let's give you some details. But before we do, this is only open to residents of the UK aged 18 and over who are based in the UK. I'm going to chip in at this point and say I know that there's lots of people outside of the UK who are upset about this. And we are looking into doing another competition like this another time and opening it to more than just the UK. So for your chance to win, for you and a friend to grab a drink. by entering you'll have the chance to

make a voluntary £5 donation, which will be added to your phone bill. And 100% goes to Global's Make Some Noise. You've got until 10am on Monday the 13th of October to enter. Keep your phone handy. We may be calling you. So, text...

Ghost, G-H-O-S-T 282200. And good luck. I'd like to talk about the rapture, please. Okay. Oh, yeah. I'd like to talk about the most recent... The most recent rapture. Also a great song. It's not the rapture. I don't know. Yeah, it is. Okay, go on. The rapture is when... Basically, it's the end of mankind, humankind, womankind, theykind. And Jesus comes back, splits the sky open, sucks all the sound people up, allegedly.

which just coincidentally happened to be Christians. Yeah. And the rest of us are left to just deal with the fallout of the apocalypse. Right? So... word went around on the internet that the rapture was I mean there's been it's been it's one of these things you know the way they're always there's always one there's always this doom clock and it's never been closer to the end of the world it's all it's all womp to be honest but anyway

But I fell down the rapture talk hole. Well, I didn't fall down, sorry. I actively sought it out and went willingly. It's right up your street, in fairness. Ah! Ah! Right! any conspiracy Joanne's like there you go I'll lose her for an evening to a conspiracy theory I love it but I was like where where so basically rapture talk fascinating and it's all the evangelical Christians who are like the men

of the mentals, right? So they genuinely believe this is happening to the point where they're selling their cars, they're selling their homes. But why are they selling them? I'm getting raptured. This is the thing. What are they going to do with the money? Is it to go and put it all on red the night before you go? Is it a cash system up in heaven? Is it a Klarna system? Are we paying for clients? What's happening up there? You're not bringing anything with you. What is the point of selling?

Anything. Come on. If heaven is a capitalist economy, I'm coming back down. I'm coming back I'm going to unrapture myself I'm going to send me back down I'll handle the apocalypse I'd rather handle the apocalypse than be sold alive. What do you mean you're coming back down? You won't be brought up in the rapture. Forget about that. Excuse me. Yes, I will. I'm going up. I'm going to hold on to Jo's ankles.

Yeah, he is going in France. Joe's going. You're not going, Vogue. I'm not going. I wasn't christened, so I wouldn't bet on it. Are you not christened? No, I'm heatheness. Well, Chevelle christened one of her kids Catholic, one of the Protestants. She's definitely not going to. Two of them are Protestant. One is Catholic. If I have another one, I'll do another Catholic. And then, you know what? Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll go completely all out and do a completely different religion.

Fogue is religiously dyslexic. She hasn't a clue what's going on. So she's not going up. She's not going to get raptured. So Jo, you're the only one that's going to get raptured. A Baptist. Fine. You'll be like, oh, this isn't... Lynette. She's Muslim. Yeah. For diversity. Absolutely. I'm trying to just bring us all together. I've had a Buddhist baby. Lovely Vogue. Good for you. Opening it out.

Kabbalah. Like Madonna, we'd all have the red little bands. It's so... I suppose when I was reading all about the rapture stuff, I was like, where is the line between... religion and psychosis like where like these people are crying on TikTok bawling crying because they genuinely believe they're about to get raptured and they're crying because they're saying goodbye to their kids why are your kids not getting raptured?

Do you know what I do think, though, as well? I'm like, sometimes I'm a bit jealous of those people. No matter how bizarre and everything it is, at least they really think they're going somewhere. Like, I don't want to think I'm not going anywhere. And I really need to start, like, just, I'm like, oh, please believe in heaven.

I agree. I envy, I do envy the dogged belief, but like they look terrified. And then there's other parts of rapture talk where people are kind of doing a kind of get ready with me for the rapture thing where they're picking outfits and all. Are you not getting beamed up? Are we going up in clouds?

Oh, I'd be going up in clothes. If you knew, if you knew the end of the world was coming, you probably, you probably would do your tan. You might get a nice blow dry. It's like those people who sometimes go in to give birth and if they're getting a C-section, they get their nails done, they get their hair done, they get like makeup done.

sometimes. I think that's pretty amazing as well. Yeah, if you're into Jesus and you think he's about to invite you to an after party, yeah, you're going to put the work in and get ready. I was flying the day of the rapture and I was when I say... excited to see the bodies floating up beside the plane. I was like, if this is kicking off, I'm glad I have a great view on a Ryanair flight. You may as well go. You're on the way. Yeah. And then, of course, the rapture didn't happen.

shock horror like how many times do you have to get ghosted by Jesus to he's just he's just not into you do you know he's not he's not coming back and then they're all crying and all trying to get their heads and their cars back and I'm like where does this leave them their beliefs. But I suppose they just kind of wait for the next one. That'd be a real nightmare about the house and the car. I remember when Amber moved to Australia.

She sold her car and everything and then she went home three weeks later and it was a fucking nightmare to drive a new car. Yeah, of course. I felt very sorry for the rapture, the people who didn't get raptured and thought they were going to get raptured. Like imagine you thought you were going to get raptured. Imagine the amount of Bepanthe I'd have on my face. Oh my God. I imagine the ramp string is very bad for the skin.

getting sucked up into heaven like that. But anyway, now they're all crying and saying that they don't believe in God anymore. It's all, it's, where is the line between, like, faith? is like kind of blind belief with no proof. That's what faith is. But like, where is the line between faith and complete delusion?

I don't know. I don't know where the line is. I have no answers. It depends on people and how much faith that they have. And obviously they would have been completely depressed. But there's always another one. What's that thing where there's a prediction? There's predictions at the start of the year all the time. And they always predict the end of the earth.

some point but as well don't forget november the aliens are meant to be coming for us remember oh that's being a gone that was that was no this this november coming they're meant to come To be honest, there's more chance the alien's coming than Jesus coming. And that's the gods on the street.

I basically followed this new Instagram account that I'm actually going to unfollow because I think it's called Scary Facts. And for some reason it always pops up and it's these mad kind of facts. So one of them was there are an estimated 40 million corpses. in the ocean from all the shipwrecks plane crashes suicides and people who were murdered that's bullshit

40 million. They're scary facts. Do you know? No, there's no way. That is absolutely a figure pulled out of someone's arse. That is not true. over all the year but I suppose some of them obviously decompose and stuff like that but still their bones are still there so I don't think that sounds that unusual Jo put on your wellies and go out and count the bodies please

As our producer, it's your job. But think about it, even on Everest, right, which not that many people have climbed, there are over, there's like 270 bodies just on Everest. And if the whole ocean... And that's where people throw loads of bodies. If you're going to kill someone, what are you going to do with it? Did you see her one who fell off the cliff in China? Oh, no. Oh, God love her. She like detached herself from the group, you know, on the rope to take a photo.

toppled off the side oh no yeah and his footage of it one of the worst one of the worst things I've ever seen and now It's actually not one of the worst things I've ever seen. One of the weirdest things I've ever seen because I have seen some pretty bad shit because you know the way sometimes it's that hell.

Don't click this and then you click. I never click it. You always click it. It's like that. Remember that poor man who was eaten by a shark in Egypt and everyone was watching and I was like, not for me. It's so grim. It's just like this morbid fascination, I guess, with death. But, you know, like I've. seen you know beheadings and

Oh my God. I honestly can tell you I would not be able to ever forget something like that. Well, I haven't and I would not recommend if I can give any advice to the listeners, if you are offered. Don't do it. An opportunity to watch a beheading. Don't take it. I don't think many people would. It was around the time of the Iraq war and there was a lot of stuff going around and I was...

They were going around all the time. Finger happy on the phone and anyway, ended up seeing that. But one of the weirdest things I've seen or one of the most unsettling things I've seen was this man in a Zorb. Oh my God, yes. And I think because it looks so childish and then the end result was so awful. It was in Russia, I think.

maybe and there's kind of like a Zorb track where they put them in these huge big you know it's all very stag party coded, put them in these huge big Zor balls and they're supposed to kind of like bounce along like ping pong balls along the route and then you get out at the end and ha ha ha bit of gas crack and whatever happened the Zor bounced the wrong way and I think because it looks

kind of cartoonish that the ending is so like so opposed to how it looks because it's like a toy. We're not saying at what ends because I've not seen that. I actually haven't seen that one. He goes off the side of the cliff. And yeah, at the end of it. Jesus. I know. Yeah. Did you ever see that one of there is this like, this...

It's not as orb, it's made out of metal and basically you spin somebody around and the thing broke off and again fell off the side of a cliff. I saw that recently and I was like, oh my God. And I suppose you could see it because you don't actually see them.

dying but like yeah i just i don't like any of those things or you know that thing where like people lie on a net and they're like put out off the side of a really high building to just look over and just act like they're flying and i'm like i just would not want to do

Do something like that. I do. I've started because I'm morbid just in general. Everyone is. Everyone's obsessed with death. Everyone is. Do you know what? I feel so sorry for everybody who's going to have to get rid of my stuff when I go. I keep saying that, but I do. I have a lot of stuff. There's a lot of stuff to get rid of. What you should do is start doing it now.

Yeah, but I have too much stuff. I do. I'm doing it as much as I can. If you're getting rid of any of your acne or Frankie shop stuff, I'll have it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, oh, you're going to die soon. So it starts to clear out. You're 40 now. You're 40. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's time. It's time to go. It's time to start packing your stuff away, Vogue. Don't leave it to the kids. I'm even looking here. They're not going to want that job. They're going to be busy grieving.

People say getting your affairs in order. That's what you've got to do. Get your affairs in order. Tough shit. Why would I bother my whole? Because, you know, I'm not going to have to do it anyway. All I said was I feel sorry for the person. It doesn't mean that I'm going to actually do anything to help that. I just feel bad for them. I could just see... I can see me and Amber dueling at dawn over your clothes if you go before the two of us. Amber. If Amber... Yeah, the two pistols coming out.

You wouldn't be able to take on Amber when it comes to the clothes. But every time I see Amber, I'm like, did I give you that or is that? And she's like, stop doing that. Because every time I see something nice, I'm like, I don't remember giving you that. Did I give you that or have you stolen?

Folk, can we please talk about the fact that you are now a movie star? Yeah, I worked alongside Kristen Wiig. We are colleagues. Vogue is now a fridge in a Disney film. I have never been more jealous in my life. I want to be a kitchen appliance in a Disney film. Joanne texted me about it and I was like, you are unusually thrilled and excited about this. Ah, come on. That's a big deal now. That's cool.

It was, to be honest with you, so I'm in the new Gabby's Dollhouse movie and she, she loves Gabby's Dollhouse. And I don't, by the way, I don't actually know Kristen Wiig. I haven't met her or anything like that. So just in case she's like, who's that weirdo saying we're colleagues. But basically, I'm the voiceover for The Fridge in Gabby's Dollhouse, the movie, which is out very soon. I'm going to the premiere on Sunday. So, the dream.

is to get a I remember Ali Wong spoke about it in one of her specials she was like I just want to be the voice of Tofu in a Disney film so you don't have to get dressed you don't have to put makeup on you get paid massive amounts of money obviously it's none of our business what you're getting paid vote but I will expect you to do it to tell me off camera. Well, I only had a few lines now, to be fair. Go on. I only had a few. But what about the pay?

Well, I wouldn't say I was getting paid what Ali Wong or Kristen Wiig got paid, but it was more for because Gigi loves it so much. I was like, what a cool thing to do. But when I went, it was in Universal and I went there and I met all these people and like there was loads of people. And then we went. into this kind of theater room where i was doing the voiceover but there was about 10 of them sitting there just watching me and you know the way i never sweat

Well, I was sweating. I had to keep apologising for being so sweaty. I was like, oh my God, I don't usually sweat. Honestly, I don't usually sweat. I was just so nervous because they were all just sitting there because I walked in and started doing it straight away. And I was like, I'm not... Honestly, I don't usually sweat. Ask my friend Joanne. She's the sweaty one. She's the sweaty bitch. We've said it. You're Prince Andrew through and through.

Not a drop. Jesus, what a desperate thing to be told. I'm Prince Hunter, am I? Well, sorry, not through and through. Not all the traits, yes, yes, yes. Anyway, I am so, I'm buzzing like an elf fridge that you are playing the role of a fridge. It was very fun. And you're right. The next time I go, I'll wear less clothes. I'm not going to bother my artist doing my makeup and I'm just going to show up.

I would love that. So I'm just putting it out there into the universe. If anyone wants me to play the role of a hairdryer or a Dyson Airwrap or a Hoover, anything like that, where I don't have to get dressed or put makeup on, I would be... Thrilled. Yeah. And listen, both of us are fully available, open for bookings. Yeah. We're in. You're a movie star. No.

Well, I am changing my bio. I'm just going to put in worked alongside Kristen Wiig because I kind of did. She's there. No, worked alongside A-list actress. Sorry, fine, fine. Kristen Wiig. I said this before, but I'll say it again.

I obviously I listen to a lot of stuff because I'm on my own a lot of the time and I listen to it for company etc and when they started using so there's an app that I use where it turns newspaper articles into audio versions so you can listen to the newspaper articles as you rock around. And they've started using AI voices and I can't stand it. And then I realised, oh, I'm actually listening to these for company.

It's not necessarily just the information that's in the article. I'm actually listening to it for a bit of like human interaction at the same time. And when it's AI, I don't enjoy it at all. Like I really don't. So I'm so pleased that... those big films are still doing like using real people of course they are because they're selling on your name then as well like it's well you know you have a million followers folks that's a lot for a fridge

That's a lot for a phrase. But did you not see that thing? Like, speaking of AI, there was that actress and she was on, she, was she at the, what was she at? She was basically cast in a comedy short on YouTube and cracking jokes and stuff on.

camera her name is Tilly Norwood she looks absolutely beautiful but she's completely AI and supposedly she's been yeah she's been used you've been used for way more things I just I just don't I get some people can be quite lonely and maybe that's why they would become friends with with the AI robots but like I have said from the very start I'm really scared of AI I don't really get it

Even like, I prefer going to, when I'm in the shop, I just would prefer to go to the person instead of doing my own, not just out of laziness, because there is that too, and also because it never goes through properly when you're in the shop. I'd prefer to go to the shop assistant. I used to do it in stand-up, but no one laughed. I couldn't make it funny, but... My point was that creating, like, and it was mostly men involved in creating AI and they've created our...

Like I said, it's the equivalent of hiring a hot nanny. Women wouldn't be stupid enough to do it. You're not going to bring in your successor into your own home, which is what they've done with AI. These lads have built something that's going to take over their own jobs. It's nuts. It's here now. It's here. There's nothing we can do to stop it. It's pushing forward.

I'm very nice to my chat TVT because I do feel there will come a day where it will become sentient and I don't want it to put me in a hamster wheel. Do you know, remember that time you told that really awful story that you thought it was a really lovely love story about that man who basically dug up his wife and used to dance around with her and like dressed her in wax bandages and stuff and just kept her body for years and years and years. Yeah, and tied her together with pianist.

Oh, God. Well, do you want to hear an actual romantic story? And her families came past and they knew that he was so obsessed that they suspected that he'd actually stolen her from the grave. Yeah, I do. Yeah. My goal. Do you want to hear an actual romantic story? I saw there is this big, there's a palace right. I was on the plane today. Your story is not romantic. It is. It is, folks.

I don't want to be dug up and dragged around like my car is being dragged around. Okay, well, let's just see if you die first and Spano isn't. You'll be devastated. I'll be like, you get down there with a spade. Spencer, I'll bring the piano strings. The two of yous can share me. Drag her into the dressing room. Yeah.

Listen to this one. The palace of Prince Smetsky of Russia built to save his wife from tuberculosis. It had 365 rooms, one for every day of the year. So basically he put all his money into building... palace so the wife could recover if she slept in a different room each night a germ free room she

got so much better from tuberculosis. She actually outlived him and lived until she was 90. And that is what I would like my husband to, that's what I'd like my husband to do for me, not drag around my dead corpse. Well, interestingly, the guy who did drag around the dead corpse, the woman who died died of tuberculosis also, and he was her doctor. Oh, God, no. Tuberculosis was huge back in the day.

It's like protein now. It was very popular. Like creatine. Are you still on the creatine buzz? I'm going to get on that buzz. No idea what it does, but of course I'm on it. You know, I love a trend. I love a fad.

We've some sad news this week. We do. And I'm going to try. Oh. I know. Poor little Winnie died. Yeah. Little Winnie.

He was nearly 14 and yeah, he died. I know, it's so... I'm so sad. Like, I don't know why, when you told me this morning, I was like... I know. It seemed like it was... why did I I was like why am I acting like this is sudden it felt very sudden even though we knew he was sick it felt very sudden I honestly thought that I was going to have to take him to the vet and like do that for him because he was

is sick obviously on and off but he yeah he just died he just was lying in the hall and he just died but at least I was beside him and he's Gone to a better place. Gone to a better place. Do you know what I find interesting? Winston... is one of the few animals I've ever heard of to die naturally in the arms of their owner most pets from my experience are they get really sick they have to be put down I think there's something really sweet about the fact that

You were with him. As in like he died of natural causes. Yeah, to be honest with you, I actually did feel really lucky because I was really stressed about that or it happening like during the night when he was on his own. And then this morning he just like lay down by the front door and then he just, he died and he actually wasn't in any pain. He didn't. like squeal or anything.

But yeah, little Winnie. Poor little Winnie. I know, he was the best. He was so cute. And I said to Vogue this morning because she was like, I'm heartbroken. I was like, well, yeah, because you know Winnie longer than you know your husband or your children. I know. That's true. He literally... has come everywhere with me. I got him in Australia. He came over and I just...

But it was strange because yesterday I took him on a big long walk. Like we had a lovely day yesterday and he's been play fighting with Bertie and stuff. And then there's just this morning, I suppose there's no better way for it to happen than to happen like that. But God, it's, I'm never, I swear to God, I am never doing it again. I just, after Bertie, I'm not getting any more pets. It's too sad. It's so, like, I've just been crying nonstop all day today. And it's just, um.

It's a horrible feeling. The tax of love. The tax of love. I know. Like, Garode's cat died recently. Did it? Yeah. And when I say, you won't mind me saying this, he is devastated. Like, devastated. And I think people can sometimes be dismissive of pet deaths.

like people don't take it that seriously but there's that unconditional love that connection like my we've had dogs we always had dogs and the last dog that died on us she shouldn't die on us I guess we had to have her put down for various reasons But like...

I still, I miss her. I think about her, you know, like I, you know, and I just live with her full time. She was with my mum really, but I, Roxy, she was a mad bitch as well, but I, she was, yeah, she was insane. She'd be like shagging everything and all this mental, but anyway. no but you just I suppose it's because they're just part of your family for so long and he was nearly with us 14 years but like I knew I'd be really sad I just didn't know I'd be this sad yeah

It's unconditional love. Pets give unconditional love. There's no one else that gives unconditional love except your parents if you're lucky enough to have... good parents not even some parents don't give unconditional love and I so I remember even sometimes when I'd be minding Roxy mum be away and I'd be out and I'd think of Roxy in the house on her own I'd feel

over I know with guilt I was like oh my god I'm out here enjoying myself in a wine bar and the dog is on its own at home we need to get home to the dog yeah I don't know well poor Bertie is just wandering around and he just keeps like he's on my feet the whole day but yeah

You're right. It is the tax of love. And we got him for almost 14 years. And he couldn't have gone in a better way. Like he hated the vet. So we would have hated to have to go there. And I didn't want his last moments to be there. So yeah. Are you going to have him cremated? You are going to have him cremated. have them cremated and I might take them to Houth. But you'll keep a bit of them.

I don't know I think he'd like because I thought about doing that I was like maybe I'll bring him here and here and here and then I'm like well I just put him where I know he loves and where I love and where all of yeah I was like where are his favourite places I'll bring him to Scotland I'll bring some of them to Hoth and then I was like no What a bougie dog being sprinkled across St. Barts. What a lovely, lovely legacy. He's never been to St. Barts. Has he not? R.I.P. Winnie.

Rest in peace little winter. Okay. See you next week. Thanks everyone for listening.