Red Pill Black Pill: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode

it's not cool, man. It's a lot of like, oh it is this too crazy for you? Know? You bitch made at you. Nigga is scared to adjust the real thing out there. Listen, I eat dinner in the dark. Nothing's too crazy. I watching meat dinner in the dark. I'm the craziest that is. I yeah, first of all. Second of all, I placed by that you nailed down. I'm getting nice with it. I gotta start practicing the harmonica. Yeah, no, you gotta warm up. And frankly, I still haven't practiced

my nunchucks. So we should feel like we should be like we should give it like, okay, because we're gonna get to two thousand subscribers. Yeah, we gotta put a deadline on my ship. So that this this I'm saying, we plan it for like a future live show. Like then it's like, come out and you can see the nunchucks and the harmonica. You are okay, okay, Yeah, I don't mind. I don't mind Baton switching the listeners a little bit. I don't like, Oh yeah, fuck them, you

know what I mean, you like, fuck them. I don't owe you shit. Yeah, I don't know you except for mom my mom, everybody else, so man, moms, the sort of family members, my little brother. This is this is a perfect I think, a perfect h marrying of our two obligations. So that's what I'm saying. At two thousand, we will team up and showcase both skills at once at a live show. Once. I like that, even Yesukay, let's fucking turn it into like a little bit of

a Obama Springstein hook up. Yeah, get somebody to wrap, Oh, Olivia, that's what you're going at the live show. You Olivia is gonna wrap. I'll back you with the beat and then you gotta I'm gonna be honest, you probably gotta like you're gonna have to at least get a headband. I want you goddamn right, I'll wear a headband, and I want I want Olivia wrapping the words to fight the powers as I Nunchuck and you Harmonica. This is this is gonna be a problem. You should get. You

should get. You know what you should get is like one of those Kendrick karate suits. You know what I'm saying. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, when he became self aware inside of that nickname and he was like, yeah, this is this is my outfits. Now, Yeah, that's got complicated. If the artist journey, sometimes I think he's maybe not for me. Yeah, you start making these weird, like almost like cartoonish choices and we have to be like, I

think it's because he's complicated. Yeah, Like I think he's just a really smart guy. Like I'm never gonna get a hat that crazy that it's gonna make you think I'm smarter than I am, do you? Yeah? Yeah yeah, yeah, Like there has to be a level where you're saying shit and nobody really knows what's going on, and I'm just too I'm too grounded for that I think. Yeah, it seems especially in the rap world, where they're like constantly telling us that they're bringing their original friends along

for like this entire journey. It feels like that's not even possible when you're wearing a karate outfit. Bro, Like the niggas you grew up with are either they are not your friends or they have been long gone. And you know it's the new people I live in my city. You think I could just like start just like a fucking gaucho and that's just gonna go. That's just gonna go. I gotta just like, yeah, a guy the fucking Rodigo grill, and everybody's just gonna be like, oh, yeah, that's the

same Dave. That's the same guy I saw. It's too many, too many questions. I bought a pair of wide leg jeans and went to a party and everyone noticed, you know what I mean, everyone it's like, bro, those flares and I'm like, yeah, well, you know it was part of this. They were like, no, nigga, no, not how you did it? No two weeks ago, sir, Yeah, I respect Andre. I don't know who we had around it. Let that transformation happen, because my people would not. My

mom would be calling me like you just started going crazy. No, no, you can't get away with none of that. I've been thinking about getting some of those loafers and everybody's wearing and I'm like, I don't even know if I can. I don't even know like I wear, I can't wear them. To the barber shop, bro, I wore some loafers to show. I thought it was cool. Thanks man. But then but

then on the way we we went and got food. Afterwards, everybody was hanging out and ship and then Sydney noticed I had on loafers and roasted me to no end talk. She called me all kinds of uh. She said I was wearing Harlem Renaissance fives, and she was she was losing her mind making fun of my shoes. She is very funny, but she's a person who can wear experimental new clothing. I don't know. I think you had to

start like that. Like had I been pushing the boundaries of fashion early on, I think it would be allowed now. But I was always like right in the middle, like I want to and now look at me, I can't wear flares, right, Yeah, you gotta show up with the energy like, Hey, my name is David Borie, and I may not be in this hat tomorrow, you know what I mean, Like it's gonna be a whole different vest. People.

People don't know how to take me if I show up not wearing some form of athleisure, Like if I don't have a Nike swoosh anywhere on my person, people start to get nervous. Let alone, I flare. I wish I would get a new cut on a pant. Yeah, I haven't. I haven't had a new cut on a pant. I when boo, when it boot cut stuff, I've been like boot cut. I don't know, man, that those have been what is that two thousand and four or that we were we were in a deep boot cut. That's

the last. That's the last new cut for me. That's the last new cut for me. So for so your transitions have really been about like starching or not starching, yeah, or just like better as shirts. Yeah you're fashionable, But but the cut that's the same cut, baby, bro. No, there's no different cut. There's no different different I can't even. I can't even. That's what the world I live in. Wow, have you ever been to a big bare not a lot of cuts. It seems freeing to some extent. It's like, nah,

I figured out the pants that work. I I ain't never reassessing this band, right. I just want to have a crazy summer, though, like one summer where just I'm pulling up in linens. See linen isn't even that. I don't even know what the exciting fabrics are. I'm gonna I'm gonna tell you this. You gotta go to you gotta make this international. If you're gonna pull that off, you gotta, like I think, you gotta spend the summer in like France or and come back yeah this summer.

So yeah, okay, that's that's perfect because now you can truly pick your summer style that fits Brazil and rock that shit. And then when you come back and you slowly reintroduce some of those extra pieces into your wardrobe, it's like, nah, that motherfucker got little Brazil in him here. Yeah, that's all that is. But the thing is, my mind is not even set up for this year. Like when I'm in my head, we're talking about that, and all I'm doing is imagining myself in like matching short sets.

That's not even excited now that ain't you gotta he there's an evolution beyond just like oh this this has flowers on it. So yeah, yeah, I just didn't you know how how slowly and in like steadily I had to integrate like flowers, the colored purple. Yeah, like like man, but I just want to like crazy, like a hat with a feather, like the mask. That's not it. You're in the writer's room. But you understand what I'm saying. No, I get it. You gotta you know what it is.

You gotta do it. Just a taste of Harry styles. You don't gotta go all the way Harry styles he'd be wearing like you know, yeah he goes crazy, but but just a taste of Harry styles where it's like, hey, that's not how that shirt would normally be cut. All right, here we go. Well, I think we I think I need to introduce successories that aren't just like a watch, but you know, sometimes as rocky you'll have like a

crazy scarf. Yeah, I need to start with that and then kind from there, Yeah, a gaudy fanny pack even like you highly like, oh man, don't be scared of whatever, man, because you're thing I put on a gaudy fanny back. I'm gonna look like like it's not gonna look like you think it's okay you do, I mean I get it thick for a gaudy fan like like a bedazzled Yeah. I wasn't thinking you would put it fanny pack style. I think cross yeah, cross strap type. Yeah, with the

titties and all that. Split that's the class. Oh yeah, split, yes, yes, you gotta. You want your fanny back to uh titty fuck you a little bit, and yet that's the style. Put your hand on my throat. Did we get to the emails? Yeah, we can do it. You can do it. I think this was a good I think this was I think this is helpful for probably a lot of people listening who were scared to like break out of Like damn, don't be scared of it, y'all. You you

can do it. Also, we don't give fuck either way. Yeah, keep listening. I truly don't give it. I don't care what you're wearing when you're listening. We just want your ears. Baby, you're listening mostly naked, and baby, he ain't mad at it. I come on, come on, man, how is my man supposed to set his meat with this shit. Bro, what the fuck you're killing to day? You're killing it today? And I woke up. Man, you're going crazy. We have

a micronsing. It's just the whole thing. We have an email from a person who U goes by the name of Nisha. Nisha sent us an email and she said, to the hosts of one of my favorite podcasts, I don't like one of just say your favorite, Nisha, what the fuck? Yeah, I don't give a shit if you listen to The Dollar or whatever. Oh you love us and the Joe Rogan Experience. We get it. Yeah, it's us in my favorite murder. I understand. Sorry, we're not

true cry all right. So, so she says, I was listening to the last episode where y'all were saying that the Matrix wasn't good after the first one. I strongly believe it's because they stole the idea from a black woman and couldn't improve upon it well enough to make sequels. This might be just like obviously true, but I want us to talk about I want us to talk about this more. The same woman also created the Terminator and talks about how they related a little bit here, and

then she links and she says best Nisha. Now, it is worth mentioning before we fully jump into this, that we have addressed this a little bit on the show, that the matrix and terminator were both created by the same black woman. There are countless YouTube videos of this woman explaining her position on the whole thing, and some people have become very adamant that this is true. I will note that in our previous addressing of this, I

personally do not believe it to be true. For a second. Hey, I don't I'm not buying this ship one minute, ever. Kind of what Okay, let's okay, let's start. Let's start here. Why why what is it that makes you feel like this is in no way true? Okay, here's what I'll say. Uh, this black woman, I don't know her fucking name because she's nuts, because she's a goddamn nutty, cuckoo crazy, she's out of her fucking mind. I had never memorized her name. But but if you look up black woman. Okay, so

Fia Stewart, it's her name. Olivia is sending us a vital information as we're talking this. So Fia Stewart is this woman's name, and she claims that she originally submitted the script for a Terminator I believe to writing competition that basically there was a magazine that had like a an open submission from I believe the Wachowskis. Isn't that their name? That that made the Matrix? That, oh, Terminator was like James Cameron, right, big dog. I am telling

you what her claim is. I am not necessarily even suggesting that it makes sense. But she submits a writing competition for the the siblings, Yes, that made the Matrix, and then somehow those scripts were usurped by them to then make Terminator Terminator two and then subsequently the Matrix. You they have been like children. Again. It doesn't make sense, but that's her argument. Yeah, this isn't good because I thought it was gonna be. You know, there's that movie

that was just like the Matrix. They came out like a year before without the budget, Perfect Dark or whatever where they said all the Flock, which I thought that movie is pretty great. By the way, I never saw it for it it's it's actually pretty good. Yeah. And that's dark is that the it's a that's a Vin Diesel uh where he's blind? Yeah. I think Perfect Dark was was it was maybe the original of it, and

then Riddick was like their spinoff from okay him. A lot of people don't know that about the Chronicles of ridding U. No, that's insane, but yeah, it's it's real weird shit, man. And I'll go on to say that the argument Mint is and this is one of the things that people try to use to support somehow her being because those movies are so far apart, right that they're little apart a decade of distance between I think

the original and in the Matrix. And one of the arguments that she makes is that it's the same universe that the Matrix is the sort of like I guess the fault the future fallout of our world also living inside of the Skynet takeoff matrix exactly that like you know, the world, it's the same way in the actual matrix the world is destroyed. They're saying that those are terminators walking around on the Earth that that are then traveling back.

It's all simultaneous essentially. I Mean, here's the thing I does think, like sometimes I feel like science fiction it's like rap. There's just a lot of genre stuff that is who knows whose idea wasn't for the first mobile suit in anime. You know what I'm saying. I think there's a lot of like I don't think the idea of like we're all living in a simulation. I don't think the Wachowskis invented that as a science fiction theme. No,

I don't think so either. And I think that that's that or the idea of AI becoming sentient and taking over. I don't think that the Terminator invented that. And I think I think she isn't crazy in that she didn't come up with an idea that crossed over to some of these things. Right. She might have had a little little bit of something on her fingers and it was like, holy shit, that idea is like my idea. But that come on, well, that that ain't people stealing from you.

That's just that's something else. Listen, I'm gonna tell you something that happened to me this week. This is gonna fuck you up. Yeah. I wrote a joke about why I love big titties and then basically had an interview with will Yati where he said he relates to women with big titties for a far more selfish but similar reason. Yeah, it's just because great minds, you know you and Drizzy Drake Man. I when my when my Comedy Central uh half hour came out, I had a joke on it.

This was like, obviously it's sort of in the heart of the Trump era, right, And and in the joke, I I talked about how white people they they played a trick on us because we all thought we were on the same page. That like, they did a little bit of a magic trick where they pretended we were all reasonable, and then this motherfucker popped up and it turned out they were that we hadn't agreed on at least that and and it that same year, Kat Williams came out with a joke that is nearly identical to

the phrasing that I have in in in Punchline. Like the punchline is exactly the same. Everything else around it is a different take, But that punchline is so identical that I continue to be accused of stealing a joke that I recorded nine months before his specially even touched the earth, you know what I mean. No, I mean there's like, and that's the problem with Arthur. There's always this cross of like, you know, because original thought how

much everybody's thinking something somebody stopped before. It's just whether you're the first woman sympathize it and put it into that specific medium. Like because I thought this was gonna be like a living single kind of thing. No, yeah, it is not a living single thing. We nobody has seen any versions of these transcripts to you know, that's never cited, at least when it all comes to it, right, nobody's like, yo, word for word, bar for bar, he

stole my whole. Yeah, I ain't the soldier boyshit it is. Yeah, yeah, truly just like yo, that lady says she wrote it. Why y'all steal that? Yeah, that's too my. And because I don't know, as far as what I can tell from people who are actually great, lightning really doesn't often only strike once, So like, where are her other fantastic like ideas? Yeah, apparently they were both the matrix and terminator, which is like, okay, well why did you submit both? Then?

You know what I mean, just just go with one. Yeah, yeah, that's not a good Damn. I really wanted this one to be true. No, she's a silly billy. I'm sorry to break it to you. And and what an inspiring story. Black women can be silly billies too, y'all can do out here. I do like equal opportunity fuckery. I don't, Yeah,

I really, I really don't. I really don't. Yeah, it's this lady and that lady who pretended to know sign language for that that murder case, Like just tell us that was that was my super Bowl, Like that was that was one of the better things I've ever seen. We should have her on. Hell yeah, we gotta get her on. The lady Uppard knows don language, she gotta she gotta believe some shit for real, for real. All right,

we gotta wrap this up. Can you tell the people where they can find you on what cool shit you have going on? A watch me on Instagram at Cool Guy Jokes eighty seven. I'm I've been getting here, I've been getting your dms. I'm gonna fix the website. Here's you know, I got I gotta update the website. I understand, so official David Bore'll get updated. Then all the dates and stuff would be on there. But you know, March twenty third through twenty five comes see me at Rooster

t Feathers and Sunnyvale, California. April seventh, eighth, and ninth comes see me at the Before You Die Fest and Anchorage, Alaska and other than that, you know, oh, watch Royal Crackers premiering on HBO Max April third. And you know, listen to my mom and told me every week with your clothes off? What's your clothes off? And you can follow me at Langston Kerman as always, And if you

want to send us drops your own conspiracy theories. If you want to suggest that black women created Pretty Woman, go ahead and send those theories to my mama pod at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you. Follow the YouTube page, go watch the videos. Accuse us of being cones and sellouts. Oh we love you all right, bye bitch, and I ain't playing. Look. Motherfucking many years, so many yepisode. Motherfucking many years. Motherfucking many years, sonar, motherfucking many years. M m