Pedo Mustaches (with Steelo Brim)

Here's what I love about Marcus Houston. He's been able to take a significant fashion l in every single era.

WHOA, that's true what.

You're about to bring up.

I'm about to bring up the clear suit.

I know what you're about to bring up, obvious sgendary freak COVID.

Iive before the towers fell, like, I think we still had the towers.

I think he was still dating Beyonce when he did that.

He was like.

People never bring yet. I think he was in a clear suit smashing Beyonce. So you know, I can't believe she let that.

I like to think that Marcus Uson never actually smashed Beyonce, and it makes me feel better.

I also would like to queen, and I like to know that she did not do that. Get your clear hands off of me.

Listen, I'm play chess. Sometimes queens make bad moves. You know what I mean? You got rethink yourself, baby.

Girls, qualitys are racist. The money turn stuff now, can't tell.

Me give me that darkey button and big old legs.

Welcome back to another episode of My Mama Doon Me.

The Fine Gast when we dive deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy.

Theories, and we work to prove that the Tea and T Pain does not in fact stand for tallahassee, it stands for Trautman, as in his real father, Roger Troutman of Staff and Roger, a pioneer of the vocoder a k A. The fucking voice thing that t Paint does. He is in fact a Nepo baby. It was not on him, it was in him the whole time.

Y'all wake up the David Boren and I'm Langston Kerman, and I'm stunned at this revelation. You're saying that he had a silver auto tuner in his mouth when he was born.

He was born with it in his mouth. You thought he invented that shit. Come on, bab he and he cried, beautiful, just that was. That was He grew up to the sounds of so rough, so tough in the city of good old Watts.

If it's true, devastating, truly, we've all been rooting for Tea Paint. I think in part because of we thought he got it up for you know what I mean, He was doing it from the ground up.

He did like he got it out the mud. I was like rapper turn singer like, I get it, Come.

On, man, but no pains out here, just just you didn't even hear them. You didn't even hear the whole conspiracy theory.

Roger Troutman was killed by Larry Troutman, who was also percussions in the Zap band. I think it was a beef over t Payne's mom and the illegitimate son. Whoa to hot right now? I'm too hot, drop too hot hot right now.

Motherfucking boss. Nothing about that. That's this is heavy dog. I don't even I think it's a different we would have to do a different day.

It's a different day. Hey, you might notice that the audio fucked up.

Yeah, listen, we're not a perfect show. There are high jinks every week with this, with this program mostly I would say on David and Ice part yes that if there is an issue with the show's usually David or Eye's fault or my my fault. And and we're we're not proud of that, but we're not gonna we're not gonna hide from it. We're not.

We are not men who pretend like we are not flawed. No, you, if you cut us, do we not bleed?

We bleed, and we we bleed a lot and.

If you played Chatshaw, do we not slide.

One hop this time?

You know, no Charlie Brown.

But unfortunately, due to some technical difficulties, this episode has sort of we we've had some hijinks. We lost the first little segment of the show. And we assure you, dear listener, that it was hilarious, the really funny shit inside of this motherfucker. You know, Oh, you.

Would have loved it. Remember the first time you saw that Patti LaBelle rolling on the Floorida video. That's what you would have done, as you heard the first time. But you but it's gone.

Now, it's gone. There's nothing we can do about it. It's it's lost in the ether, lost in the sands of time. But here's the good news. Our guest is a phenomenal talent, a hilarious person, a man who you know best from from his podcast one and We but you probably know him best from from being one of the co hosts of the long running show, maybe the longest running show.

And it's like that in General Hospital.

I think I don't think I dare to say there's nothing longer. It's it's that show General Hospital, The Simpsons and c Span. I think the those four are are the sort of Mount Rushmore of long running shows. But he's one of the co hosts of Ridiculousness. He's a hilarious man, a dear friend, and and we're we're We're gonna jump straight to the research section of this episode. So don't be thrown off by the sort of weird cutting and pasting if you if it would were.

Because you know what, that's just show business. And honestly, you're lucky to have us. So what are you gonna do with the We could be anywhere right now? Bro? You don't think I could have been working for fucking all State Life right now. I could have been a term life God, I could have had equity. I'm here talking to you losers because of art.

I would be putting a tire in some water and telling you where the hole is right now.

Come on, you don't think my man would have been a big ol' savant. Quit playing with me.

But our guest, he's hilarious. Give it up for steel, O brim everybody, steel.

Amazing.

You came to a steel with a conspiracy that that I would argue also is gonna be up for some debate as falls into reality, not by me. Hey, I'm not pushing back.

Baby, I'm good.

I'm good. We're all good over here. I'm not pushing back. But I dare say you are going to upset certain gentlemen in our community. You said, my mama told me never trust a black man without a mustache or a white man with one. They're both pedophiles. Steel O. I did a bunch of research on your conspiracy that I would love to unpack with you. Now I think I think you're it's it's some pretty promising research. It was far more information than I expected to be able to find.

Is I started the room started this three for sure.

And you know what's funny. The article said ste Lo brim was walking around his high school calling niggas pedophiles when they had no facial hair.

You know, those people did turn out to be pedophiles.

That's the and that's and that's where that's see research, you gotta do.

Your I just spoke it into them, and now I feel you're right.

No, I got to explore this.

Don't put that on yourself. Don't put that right. You're right, you're right.

Why is Stelo saying this every day? Maybe I got to unpack this. I will say that. So August of two thousand and three is sort of like its first appearance in sort of like the the public lexicon, right the innern they said. They said, it first appears apparently Urban Urban Dictionary. I'm a being, man, I love a

That's him.

I just when you're talking about like a r that mass a guy.

I don't need to see no other pictures. I know.

I have a few questions.

Even as far as his research goes, yay, one was urbandctionary dot com invented?

Oh my boy did that?

My boy did that in science class? I think.

That's what I'm saying.

So it was like if it was because if this was when the site was new, there had to be a term of it catching up to previous pop culture ideas where they were filling in the blank. It had been prevalent for years. That's just when they put.

It on that this is some ship that came out in eighty six, But we didn't get hipped to it till two thousand and three.

That's because the because the website came up in Lato too, they were still just backfilling. All right, what urban slang do we need to put on there? Because urban Nicknareys ninety nine myself, Guys, did you just say the will endium?

Yeah, that's how I measured time is myself. I'm I'm twenty three years old past the millennium? You know what I mean?

You would have that album? You had that album?

Oh, I had that of course, I had that album.

That was Friends and that was his favorite album.

Come on, man, that was.

You like that album better than Big Willie Style. It wasn't talking We're talking.

No.

It wasn't about better or worse. It was about inspiration and that nigga was inspiring me in ninety nine. There was nobody else that could inspire me more than Will.

A great year.

He was, he was killing it in ninety nine.

Man, was that meant? Was that when Miami came out? Or was that before?

That's post Miami Miami? I think, yeah, what Will Yeah? I give me a second. He had that song, and I think it was with Cisco. I want to say he had it was No, it was with k C and he had that song. Yeah, well wow Wow.

West was the first single release for Willennio. Yeah, song was bad.

Then he had Will two K, which is crazy, and then he had Freaking It come out freaking What.

Was on that? I don't even remember freaking it? But come on, my boy was my boy was being sexy for the last time? Come on, No, he was. He was sexy on Big Willie Style. I don't know why I'm going so hard for Big Willy's Style.

That was a great record.

What you mean? It was clearly.

Written by Nash Well certain certain songs, for sure.

There were snicker all night on my Jolly Ranch. Well Smith didn't write.

That, No, I didn't write that down. He liked it, though, I.

Take him a little longer, but he got that.

He just had to sit in there with shoot on a cigar and listen to the beat.

So I will say it sounds like you boys are not in tune with the possibility of this two thousand and three start date. But I will say that additionally, what they plane is that in two thousand and six Adam Morrison. Y'all remember Adam Morrison, that big motherfucker from Gonzaga with the mustache apparently is the thing that pushed it over the.

Top return of the mat.

No, that's Mark Morrison.

Remember this dude was like a lurch yeah high all the times too, right, Yeah.

I think he was a super early pick in the NBA and a super regrettable choice for for number threeas they went number three and then did not do anything for anybody for a long time.

He would thrive in the NBA today, just at that time, you know, he was he was in.

An era where biggs needed to be bigs and and he ain't know how to do that, you know what I mean?

Yeah, you had to be a you have to be kind of an animal.

But Adam Morrison apparently was getting made fun of so often, and despite being the the the leading scorer in the n in the n C Double A that year, he was being made from him, specifically for his mustache, so often that literally crowds were chanting Amber alert at him while he was playing in games, and that subsequently increased the Google searches that ultimately became the popularity of the pedo stash.

I remember being at that game, a young guy umbrella.

That started. Now the question is any regrets because you were yelling at a boy he was a child.

I think Adam Morrison was like twenty when he graduated.

Sure he was. He wasn't.

All four years, isn't he.

Yeah, he wasn't a one and done guy. I know that for sure.

And I waited until he became nineteen yeings.

I was never at a child with cat calling.

That's really all you can do. Yeah, yeah, you just gotta wait to wait till they're nineteen.

Speaking of wild hair choices, can we can we just take a moment for for recent Marcus Houston hairs, those.

Braids, those fake fake braids, the braids.

He he was in a two B program where he had arguably something far worse than Shamar Moore. Possible, Tyler bro you gotta take a look and just just take a gander. We look at it now and make a choice.

It's he looks nothing like Roger.

That's not the Roger. I know.

I think he got the braids to lead you off the internet. I cannot find them.

It was a very exciting day on Twitter a few days ago. Now, granted I don't have a Twitter anymore, but I do have burner accounts, and yeah, you gotta explore out here. But the point is, oh, this goes on, right, So the two thousand and seven the pedo stash apparently gets this giant influx on Google. It's it's suddenly like become this this Google hot search, all the way up to fifty one out of one hundred in its scale.

I mean, famous people with mustache.

I think there just wasn't a term for it. I think it was a thing we all knew. It's like Bomo. Bomo's been around for everybody. We just didn't put a word on it.

To it right then you got it? Yeah, walk us through all of your feelings.

Well, first of all, he didn't need desires. They could could have kept me straight backs.

Oh they're so thick and so high.

It's like a box, a box.

They sit up tall. Baby, those ain't those ain't resting.

Also, his beard is fake as well, right, I.

Think everything is fake in that picture.

Yes, that's the budget right on the print screen. Story by Chris Stokes here.

Yeah, it's a bad combination.

Oh my god.

Mark.

Yeah, in the news a lot.

Lately, Marcus Neston's been acting up a lot laterly.

Just notorious for making poor decisions. Yeah yeah, like physically.

Yeah, he keeps doing it to himself, and in that way I respect it. It's like, yeah, I mean who you are and I repeating who you are? And he did I will say the immature I m X errors.

Well magic, I mean they both had hits. That's what the igh MX was it?

Stay the Night? Was that the first time.

Yeah, my first time.

That was the i MX.

Climbing out the window?

Yeah, yeah, did you want to stay the night?

Though? Was that not? It?

Just so he gave it that song, he gave it, and that song he said, if you're gonna do it, just make sure you're strapped twice, which is the craziest.

I mean, he's already he's already used to wearing double plastic.

He's like, he's like liszten as a man who wears too much plastic. You want it to be thick. You need that thick coating of plastic, please double strap. Yeah. So so apparently, and this article that I read did a lot of research on this. Apparently if you look at the mug shots of contemporary pedophiles, right, the contemporary list, I don't either, It's not my taste, but I do report it. But the the the contemporary collection of mug shots does not, in fact reflect a bunch of people

It probably hip to it now.

Yeah yeah, yeah, I like that. It's like this whole school should have been in a room type thing.

Yeah yeah, you.

Nobody's wearing trench coats to shoot a school anymore.

No, that's what I'm saying. That's why the white mustaches now are so cheeky about it, because they know it's jumped the shark corder.

If you wear the if you go to shoot up a school, you wear an Adidas tracksuit, So you really surprise people with whatever your bullshit is.

Mobility America. I love this country.

But one of the things that that was especially interesting right because they're saying there's no direct correlation for right now. But however, there was this dude, Tom O'Carroll who wrote a book in nineteen eighty a book called and I'm not bullshitting this, a book called Pedophilia The Radical Case, in which he apparently dedicates a lot of his literature to making a case for adults and children being able

How I want to know every unit that went out.

Every government has a list of exactly what units and what address is they were sold to.

I hope he is just an agent. I hope he's just a better agent. A fake book. And he was like, this will get out.

Whoever is it? Well know, I hate to break it to you, boys, but but actually he was eventually arrested for you guessed it, pedophilia. And when he was arrested, his mugshot became sort of like the most quittessential pedophilia mustache man picture in history that like he he could not look more like what we associate with a pedophile. This is nineteen eighty big old, thick mustache, long haired, dead eyed stare like, it's all the shit that that

I've never problem more sure of myself.

That's good. That's good. I like that. Great. Great. That's what we do on this podcast.

We're really trying to hear to uplift fellow black men. That's what the Wall and I got here.

Brilliant.

No, no, you thought you thought you were a joke. You came over here, you're Jackson Pollock.

Yeah.

Man, Well, one of the things one of the things that they then use as a counter argument inside of this article is that they say that all of those men that I just listed rows to their creepy prominence between nineteen seventy three and nineteen ninety one when mustaches were most in style, and so subsequently they would say that this is more of a cultural trend rather than a pedophilic trend. Boo, I thought we're onlling something. I'm

If nothing else, the research has been mostly about white men. I haven't covered at all our black men without mustaches. And that's fair, I get it. I think there's not as much research as one. I agree with you. It is it up to us to do the researcher part of the community. You know, black people, and if you spot any out there, I'm not asking you to deliberately

And we got to get I think we got to push past this fear of snitching in relation to certain things. Look if it's something, if you're participating in crime and then a crime happens in the utell one the motherfucker, that's snitching. That's that's snitching, and you got to unpack why you did that and how that affects you. However, also if you hit it together and you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's probably if you cut my mustache and you didn't.

Tell me on the way, yeah amen, Look, yeah, if you cut my mustache, do I not bleed?

But I will say that this issue right of whether or not this would be snitching to tell on a motherfucker on the street because they look creepy, feels like we need to expand beyond that, we need to say no, that is objectively dangerous for our youth, for for our most vulnerable. We got to tell somebody.

Yeah yeah, I mean that's Jerry's final thought.

Well, what's fascinating and we need to take one.

Damn, Jerry's ridiculous. That's one of my favorite guests of all time. Really, man, I thought he was.

He's one of those ones.

I never thought he was going. No.

Yeah, you don't imagine. Jerry Springer can die as much as just fade into quiet.

We had Larry King as well, two white men who I never thought would go. Larry King even talk on the show he was gonna freeze himself, and I respected that.

I believe he didn't get to it.

Obviously, did Larry King like wear suspenders and ship like fol Larry.

King came on man being misogynistic. Oh that you were like, I don't make.

When somebody, somebody bad shares their true beliefs and you're like, oh, oh yeah, damn, You've had a lot of beautiful guests. I will say, we're gonna take one more break, but when we come back, I do, in fact have a little bit of research on the the alternative side of this, on the black men with no facial hair that I want to hear from you up all right, So we'll be back with more steel O Brimm and more. My mama told me.

Why welcome back to my mama told me. We are here with steel O Brim. I don't have my pad, but I still have my mouth. Man a thousand voices David for thanks to Kerman steel O Brim. We are discussing the mustache, the mustachioed white man, and the non facial haired black man in terms of pedophilia yea or general creepiness. Yeah, I feel like it's overall. I think there's my little murders as well.

It's not just.

Right, that's I think that's and that's that's where we should have started. It's like, also, you're a weirdo responsibility. That's fine, that's fine, that's fine.

And maybe that's where where we need to to sort of embrace our non facial haired brothers. Is like, for a while they've been called pedophiles, and we don't think you're a pedophile necessarily. We just think there's something wrong with you.

It just makes me sad. It doesn't work as good as fine. Yeah, that's all it is.

I don't like looking at you, But that doesn't mean you like looking at kids.

I think, yeah, we've all had friends, but but do you?

And that's the real question, the real question. So, in relations specifically to the black men, one of the things that that I read about or like an argument an article argued is that black men largely grow mustaches as

Yeah, and you know what it is, because that could be into that's the strong real talk.

Man. It's just like it's better.

Because the black people don't have facial hair.

Also either working in finance politics, you don't trust either one of them niggas either way, that's a good points.

Never have facial hair. And it means they're playing white guy rules when you play in those spaces, which means that they are willing to cut their facial hair largely because they're like, I need to fit into the rules of some ship that never belonged to me in the first place.

Man, let's go there, brother.

Has Obama ever has also shout out to Mayo. Hey, you know what, though, you know what those shout out to mayor Mayor Web in Denver.

He's black. He always kept a mustache on him.

Yeah, yeah, tomorrow, Oh ship, I'm out here, Okay, I.

Was in there two weeks ago to three weeks ago.

Oh hell yeah. Yeah it's the best. But yeah, so shout out to Mayor web Denver. Also, though, has Obama do you have any pictures of Obama with the beard.

I think he's had a mustache before, right.

He had a mustache when he was like uh, when he was super young, them cigarette pictures and shitt he'd be after cool mustache. And then I think maybe right after presidency he might have grown a little bit of facial hair. But it's never been anything substantial.

I can't find them, no me, even I saw a photosh.

You know who kept the beer Mommy killed Patrick? That man kept a beard and KiB what about Colin Powell? Call? You know Colin Bow didn't grown facial hair. I don't even know. I think Colin Powell had them burned off, you know what I mean? The the whatever girls there.

That's like a criminal with fingerprints. He was like, I want no traces the man.

The man named himself after misspelled colonel, you know what I mean, Like he's he's committed to this ship.

I really can't buy and with a mustache. But I trust Block somehow, I trust Rock.

He's made it to the Exceptional list.

As much as I trust a president exactly exactly. So let's start with that. Like it's not like, damn, that's crazy.

One of the things that they also point out is that in the early nineteen hundreds, many black men wore mustaches as a sign of defiance against white supremacy. That much in the way that we're talking about where white people are telling you clean shaven is the way to be, that's professional, that's the way a man's supposed to look. Black people start growing their facial hair to be like, fuck you, niggas, do how we want to do over here.

Because a nigga with facer has definitely giving him secrets. Yeah, as many secrets as he has. The only you think he has that many? He shut then up with, I'm just I just want.

To I just want to keep away a strong black man. I don't think could grow.

That's right.

If I can see you deliberately trying and veins popping out, but you trying to make.

I'm okay with that, and you know what, Eldridge, Clever had enough for the both of them.

Yeah, counts right.

I think so Clever had a strong like one of those thick thick cheese.

Yeah it was. That was a real plus one go tee for Yeah, he added some some folks to that one. Yeah.

He rocked the shadow here and there.

Yeah.

Yeah, here he had the shadow a couple of time.

I'll give it to the shadow scares me because it says now that he did cut his facial hair.

But that was what year was this? It was before three obviously, you know.

I started this. This is before Jesus. We will know what that was.

This is an old testament, this is pre Willennium.

So so the last thing that I'll point out is that they also point out that mustaches apparently are not often associated with attracting women. That like, their research shows that women are very rarely.

Actually yourself, you're not interviewing black women.

I don't think so, I'm just telling you what the thing said. But they basically said they don't find that that's something. Women are more neutral on the mustache. They are, however, you more as a sort of like weapon against men. That this is sort of like a way of asserting your dominance, much like a buck growing its horns real big.

Literally been doing that for the last hour, and I stand on that. You know, mustache pussies.

Yeah, it's just.

Men trying to big dog each other with beards and mustaches and ship.

I agree, yeah, But beers are different, you know, I'm just I'm just beers.

Beers are a whole community.

I respect you, know, of all, all all kinds, all colors, beards, only when it goes.

I don't like it when it gets too crazy, like I need you to be a beard guy.

I know how many Asian men I've met with beards.

I've been They don't grow good beards.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah, I'm gonna go so far as to say that that's not offensive because I've heard it. I know enough Asian you hear one of your barbershop. No, No, I I don't know. I don't know. I'm a hate field man, but I'm not saying this out of out of hate. I I truly think their their hair tends to be whisper and it just doesn't beard up like a full beard as well as as they would like often.

And they're taking our jobs, all right? Would you like I like them. I just don't want one date my.

Sister now I will throw in something random, go crazy.

How do you feel about Asian man getting dreadlocks lots? Have you seen this? This and the process that it takes to accomplish. How do you feel or even not even just that, also just the sponge work. Have you seen them get the box with the sponge work? Have seen that they're doing crazy things in Tokyo. I feel better about it than I feel about white guys doing it. And that's about it. Is good of anything I have to say about it.

I don't even know if I've seen white guys do it.

Guys with dreads, Yeah, but that's I don't trust that. That's the ridiculous is before I've already stood on that. I don't know white guys with dreads. It's not my thing.

Have y'all seen the video. There's nobody's thing. Nobody I was not even it's not even their thing.

Truly.

They always regret it. Yeah, they never stay that way forever. They know it's always.

A The ones in Venice are they're locked.

Yeah. I feel their dad calls them back to work at the law firm like they're on they're on rich white guy rump.

Yeah, they back out eventually. I will say that that. I don't know if y'all remember this, if y'all ever seen the video of them white low white boys doing wave checks where they'll like have one like do rags like and be like wave check pay check and then like pull their ship off and they'll have like crazy white boy waves for three minutes until somebody can do

Oh, I already ruined sneakers. What else are you gonna take from us?

I love a good white wave check. It is the funniest. Oh what is this? It's always the white guys. You're like, yea, this kid's adorable. What they don't wake up right now?

This is great?

Yeah, this is a crazy look. They'll be he'll be. They'll be the the gen Zers version of black face once we show.

Yeah, the best nigga was doing wave chip videos in twenty sixteen. You gotta go fires are are they no?

Murray's Murray's No.

I think they're using like gorilla glue. I don't know that white people's hair just does that with some murder.

Oh this is terrible, they.

They invest I mean that is the best in the world. Though.

That's really thought.

Who would have thought where that career was going to take him.

Do you think owned a big percentage of this or do you think it's just like, let's use shot moss.

I think not. As much as we want him to really love it.

I would love it to be proprietary and that he invented it.

Well, I know, let's be honest, we know he didn't invent it. We know this nigga didn't sit down and can cock anything.

You know what I mean.

He's not the Virgil of do rags. He is is very much a man just making choices. But I do think I have hope that that he owns a bigger percentage than we think.

I think.

I want to believe this was going to keep him.

I want to think he's a majority on it.

I think so. Yeah, I think he's like fifty one percent of that percent.

But I would say they're still moving units. I was saying fifteen, but yeah, they're moving units.

Fuck yeah, damn, it's that fifty one man.

That's a lot.

That's something that would have had to have been his idea or he was on the ground floor. I want to thank you. I feel like they were making do Rags. They wouldn't have it himself. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, he would have had to go to I don't know where they make velvet.

I was just good out myself. But here's the thing, here's the thing, and hear me out. Nobody up to this point had ever thought to brand Duke Rags, even Nelly when he was doing them two tone do Rags, and that was like their signature ship that he never came out with a due rag company. Bow Wow's the first motherfucker to be like, I'll put my name on it if I'm a do rag designer. Yeah, they're bow Wow do Rags. You can have fifty one percent of what is ultimately going to be a billion dollars.

Give him fifty one that's a lot. Like now now bow all the control and power.

Yeah, and then you see what happens when he runs the ship. Collaboration would be to we don't want it.

Yeah, you want to limited edition. I want to imagine you want to last. I want to imagine. Bow Wow is the logan Roy of Rags where he's just sitting at the end of You mean you mean an embarrassment, you're not a serious person. I mean, I don't. I don't.

Oh no, I hate Kendall Logan Logans take.

Yeah, I take it back. I take it back, I take it back. I love that you're like, Logan's a

Amazing through these last two words from more than two, Abraham Lincoln had no mustache and a beard. He was half white, half black. People know that, and that's why he had that.

So that's just.

On those I am on those Reddit forums.

Yes, I do know ya, right, And you look at me like I cannot.

Very tall and he got them eyes.

Yeah right, thank you guys though, letting me do that.

This is a great time. Could you tell the people where they can find you and what cool shit you have going on.

We're still just moving that train along doing ridiculousness. Two thousand more episodes we just signed on for, which doesn't sound real, but it's real. Oh that's a real number. Damn good for y'all.

Man.

I think Jay, you can find me at Steele lo O Brett.

I think across all. Maybe not TikTok, but who cares. TikTokers are not watching this right now.

I'm here. Yeah, only pedophiles there, and.

Pedophiles if you're listening, don't put us over there. Don't mix the match, baby, but follow ste lot Boy, you got anything? Who Got Joke City seven on Instagram? Watch Royal Crackers on HBO.

In June eighteenth, I'm headlining the DC Improv with my man Jamel Johnson. Come out and buy tickets to that. I think they're available online right now. And that's about it.

Fuck yeah, and as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman in May fifth and sixth. I'll be at the Atlanta Comedy Theater. May twelfth and thirteenth, I'll be in Vegas at Wise Guys, and then May nineteenth and two oneieth I'll be at Hilarities in Cleveland. Would love to see all motherfuckers out there, and as always you can.

My chips and your

All Quali bears are racists, money, turkey stuff I can't tell me