P*ssy Still Running & Ringing (with Dulcé Sloan)

there it is. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me the podcast. If it was not already for lights to change the opening sounds. Also, the tags deep into the buckets of black conspiracy, and we finally worked or proved that Kendrick Perkins is what happens when a man gets bitten by a radioactive pan of biscuits. That motherfucker feels like just country personified. Every time he talks, he moves, he thinks, and and boy,

oh boys, is it hard to watch. I like you, I like I like a big blockheaded basketball. It really feels like they paid one of the monstars put a suit off like read prompter. It's I like, I like when your hairline matches your jaw line. That's what I pictures a good fist. That man is a lego of a human Dan. Yeah, he looks like an e sports green a player. But it got out of control. You're like, how big can I make a play? Yeah? You said on the control It was like those like you can

jump in. We have we usually introduced people, but you're you're fine to jump in whenever you want. Have you seen the name of his wife? No? No, but I'm excited for you to try to explain it to us. Uh. His wife is named Vanity Alpo after her mother who's sang in Vanity six and her father Alpo Martinez rest in peace. I thought you were gonna say the uh, the pioneer of Altpo foods, not l P O U g H. Don't get into the European Alpo. Yes? Oh is she bad? Is she like a cutie PATUITI she

she's very pretty. But she looked like you fight. Okay, that's right, that's right for Kendrick Parkins. I think, yeah, I think thats good. Yeah, look like you fight no matter what hair she got on here gonna come through the house swinging them big old arms, and she gotta she gotta know how to block. You know what I mean? I would love to just get me just a big old countryman, all right, I think, girl, where I have to go back to Georgia. Yeah, I think you got it.

I don't think you're I don't think it on New York, not on the subway's I put on the subways twenty nineteen. So talk Tom. I'll tell you I was on it pretty recently. And it's it's dark down there. You get to do that. You that way, agree to disagree. I think surprised how I have to leave and the words listen you you got it? Okay? Because Ricky Valez just really motivated me. A couple of months back, we were Madison, Wisconsin,

and I was working at one club. He was working another club, and I came just to say what's up to him? And so I had flown into like an airport that was further away and I needed to change my ticket to fly out of Madison. He said, the dolls, dolls, I think, I think because I wanted to go pick up my homeboy. But then he was at a different airport. It was all fucked up, how to get a run a car whatever, and so I was like, damn, it's

gonna charge me. Said, they're gonna charge like three hundred dollars or change his ticket, but dada da, And I was trying to go back and I was like trying to figure out how to do it. I'm talking to my homeboy, and Ricky rolled up and was like, you're not gonna make another three hundred dollars boom. Yeah, that's how I feel about it. So I was like, let me go ahead and buy this place. Second, even how much did you get paid for the college you did? And I was like, yeah, I got it. Let me

come on, man, rich. People really find a way to corner you into into making some odd choices. No, that's three hundred dollars for sure. No, I don't like that. This is the thing. If I didn't spend the money, then it was like already like eleven ten, eleven o'clock. I would had to get up at like four thirty in the morning, drive across the fucking state and try to try to return a rental card as other shit. And Ricky's like, you got it. Stot last my argument.

Let me be clear. My my argument is not that you shouldn't have spent the three hundred dollars. My argument is I don't like a gray poupon eating motherfucker to roll down their limousine window and give me advice as if we're playing the same game. We ain't, motherfucker, so don't count my three hundred dollars. I might need that three hundred dollars, and I might need to wake up at four thirty for that shit. I hear you, but fuck, we forgot to warn you that boy be pressing buttons.

But but he got a soundboard. But if Ricky Valez's defense, the time that I would have taken was worth three, that's what your billable hours about. How that's how you that's how you get your worth. What are your billable hours? I fuck off all the time, I watched too much YouTube, I stayed too long in the park. But the amount of time I work versus what I get paid, I'm a wealthy man, That's all that matters. There are times I've been on a job and been like, did these

white people know I'm not doing shit? Hoof yeah? Job? But didn't feel that way. Listen, I can tell you when I was making ten dollars an hour, I had so many people worrying about where the funk I was and what time I got in the office and all his other dumb shit. Now, ain't nobody checking on me? Like,

butfucker's just a check on me? And I'm like, for the amount of money you're paying me, I'd be surprised if you weren't texting me every fifteen minutes for those for those that are unaware, a writer's room is a glorious place to fuck off. It really is like magical. You get an hour, lunch and a whole lot of time to look at your computer while another man is talking. You know what I mean. It's me tell you that two hours a day of work. Bro, I've never been.

I've never been. I'm not a writer. I've never been. I don't talk to the writers. I'm not a writer. So people about asking, like, well, what's it like being a writer on the Daily Show? I was like, I have no fucking clue. But you see, they be doing shit. I'm in my office doing various so many jobs. I'm doing this job, I'm doing a next job. You know me. Another comic starting to lift Lost line. There's that ship. Yeah, I'm executive producing laid With show, So there's that ship.

Then I got auditions and stuff to get ready for. Yeah me, Las Larabie are starting the lip bloss line for comics. Well, this is what's so crazy, men and women. If you want to borry, if you want to sell lip bloss, you can go right ahead. Don't have me out here and some kind of juicy beach glitter pretending you know, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? No, you know for a clear plane. You didn't make clear plane. Are you making this for men? You know? You want to lip bomb? No, that's like

gloss that. This is a bomb. This is I mean, it's the jelly kinds. Yeah, it's the it's the glossy kind I'm being out of here with dry lips a few times. It's very embarrassing. Oh no, I can tell you. I was getting off the plane in Atlanta. Come, I was going home and see my mom when I live in LA and you know, I need to see a

lot of black people unless I saw y'all. So sometimes you girl would be ashy, right, And I'm getting off the plane and one of the girls is cleaning the plane, and she looks at him, goes them elbows, and I'm like, I just got here. Give me two seconds. Come on, let me process. Though I might look down and catch that too and and do something about it, but you gotta give me a second. I just got back and my mother's calling me. She's like, where are you at?

I said, I'm in the bathroom putting on lotion because I don't want to sack me with some bath the body works or some fucking love spell. I got to take care of this before I get assaulted in this air pipe by black people. Well, I think what we failed to do is introduce the ash nigger we've been talking to this entire time. We this whole time. We just jumped into too riffing and talking shit. But we have a wonderful guest today. Our guests. She's on the

Great North on Fox. She's a correspondent on the Daily Show. Not to write you pieces of shit. She don't write that thing. Mineapolis Champion there apparently is an expert at you know, in the cold. She can do it all and she's been in Essence magazine. You host is what she demanded, I tell you, Uh, She's wonderful. Give it up for Dulce sloan. Oh he gros, Come on, I need some music. I don't have any music drops. They're

all kind of like witty saying, Yeah. I used to do claps and and uh for the intros, but then I gave up because because you took over. I was like, no, my boy got his own style. I'm gonna let him do that. Whom I think I'm looking forward to cracking up? I hope I can, like you totally crack up. So I haven't like totally cracked up in a long time. I ain't that better than clapping? Yes? That was? Where's where's he at now? He's got to be like what thirty five? I don't know, man, I think he's off

with the Corn Kid? Yeah, those kids. He just disappeared. Though, where's the Corn Kid? He just disappear the media? No, he is out here. He was. They literally had like the University of Nebraska had him out. He be giving an ambassador for like corn for Nebraska. No, no, no, we're aware of like that six months where they were like really hyping him up. Right. Yeah, I think what Bori's saying is, where is he now? It's like day. It's like Haley Joe Osmond after the sixth Cents. Yeah, yo,

I saw Haley Joe Osmond a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, I saw him in an an audition once. He still looks like Haley Joe Osmond. I saw him. I saw him at Um I went to go see Roryville's show at the Alasiani. Yeah, thank you? What word? I didn't want you to keep trying. It was gonna get worried you at the Alien at the Alien. Yeah, yeah, your girl was having the issue. But I'm happy to be here. Lansa is always humorous to see you, Bori. You're still

my favorite human of all time. Bory still has one of my favorite jokes from all my life, of all of my life is the man who didn't know that gay wasn't short for alligator. Oh yeah, I don't think i've heard that bit. I laugh in an entire show what I meant with fucking high planes, because like Troy Walker was like, are you loud enough? I was like, nigga, no, I don't have enough laugh in me to give it.

It's my favorite bit too. It's hardly been downhill, no lies, No, this is this is uh, maybe a little off topic, but do we all have that that bit that exists for us where you're like, well, that's my masterpiece, and then the rest of these are I'm just checking first of all, Boris Lyne because it is amazing. I have this bit where I've only said it on stage a couple of times and I don't can't do it in

front of everybody. But basically, it's like, I think about this white girl who's dating this black dude and like and they wait until, like they're married to have sex, and her parents disowned her because they didn't want her to marry a black man, you know, and her friends don't talk to her anymore because she married this black man. And then they go to have sex for the first time and his dick is small. It makes me laugh

so much. It's really funny. Only comics like it, but just the idea makes me laugh because she was gonna be worth it. She thought that she was about to be dicked down. I'm talking about plumbed started dealing with a Mario Brothers, which was about the fuck out, bro, She's about to what Miss Kelly say, she can't move her legs. I'm talking my baby deer on ice like she really thought that she was maybe it like knocks your vision out of alignment. For listen, she was trying

to get knocked cross eyed. She wanted her kids born dizzey. What is that a say that's not that's your best bit, that's the one if not a saying, there you go. Now we know what joke is yours. You said that way cuts the thing everybody says all the time. I was like, I was like the kids born dizzy theistic. My child came out discobobulate. Listen, this kid's gonna have to shake it off like a wet puppy kids. Fuck up girl. Yes, I said something like something's some girl.

I saw some bitch jogging one day pregnant. I said that whole kid's gonna be born. Disney, you need to sit the fun down on her. Wait. I know, you can't jump on a trampoline. You can't ride a horse either. You can job job and how far along you are, yeah, you're not like supposed to like go hard and far, but people do a lot of things. That depends on how old you are, because like if you're in your like your twenties, because bits could go to war. Pregnant,

right You're like it's coming out. It's coming out forty one bitch. B still see can make you loses baby rightful. Yeah, it's some nonsense and the fact that even invented their terms because it's like anyone over thirty five. But it's like nigga, I still leak monthly? Why am I? Yeah, that is one way to call it. I think still I'm still leaking. Still here, Still here, man, pussy still running? Okay, the lights are on, I'm home. I'm about six. Maybe I don't think I'm speaking out of term when I

say that's where we're gonna name this episode. Is us still still running? Pussy Still Running feels like the correct title for the running me. We can't keep talking about these running puss these weeds. You came to us with a conspiracy theory, uh that that I'm very excited for us to dig into. And I know you are too, dultly because you remembered it. It was deep in your in your in your soul. This this conspiracy theory. You said, my mama told me, if your ears are ranking, someone

is talking about you. Yes, because like my mother grew up in Miami. But my grandmother was from like Middle Georgia and then like my grandma and all of her siblings moved to Miami and like I guess the fifties, so they all left a farm, and my grandma was really up and coming right right, And so they live in a black suburb. So when I say I'm second end of generation suburbs, for fucking minute, because my mama

grew up in a black suburb in Miami. And so like my grandpa owned, like her father owned a dry cleaning business in Carol City. And if you look up Carols, Carol City is black and ship to the point that they gentrified it so much they renamed it Miami Gardens. Just had to rebrand it because you know, you throw that garden on there, people will move there. Yeah, Margaret Gardeners seems like good property and it's exceptional. It's like Carol City could be anything, you know what I mean,

over town all kind of names. Carol City could be tanned on the stomach, Carol City could be tanned on the city like uh, you know, goals, like Liberty City is where all the football players come from. That for some reason too, So they apparently there's it's wild. There's like more football players come out of Liberty City, Florida than any other place, like professional football players, you know how you see like the University of Miami and the

niggas all have goals, but they're like nineteen. Yeah, yeah, they're all from Liberty City. Damn. Okay, so look like grown, like grown, like they already have kids, so they're they're getting whatever the opposite of like flint water is down there.

Oh yeah, he's it's extra nutritious water. But yeah, so I mean, it's also the reason that I'm very glad that I did not go to the University of Miami because I got weight listed for it my dream school, and if I would have gone like I wanted to, I would have gotten pregnant in nineteen with twins from some nigga on the football team that didn't play. So you have to know who your right. I can't emphasize enough how far we've drifted off topic. I tell you

I'm a problem. So what I'm saying is that the whole idea of that someone calling your name ears rings some country shit, right, And it's interesting that the same country ship came down with it's like just because you're in a new location doesn't mean y'all niggas wasn't country. So it was just that whole ear ringing or because it's like it was. What was so interesting is like

the ear ringing when someone was talking about you. But if you heard your name and nobody was around, that meant the devil was calling you, so you couldn't respond to it, which I always thought was interesting. I was much scary terrifying. So and I was like as a kid, I was like, how come it's not God calling man? Why is it devil? So it's like I thought it was interesting. It's like that hearing your name wasn't someone

talking about you? Yeah, but your ears ringing with somebody talking about you, or your hand itching meant you were gonna get money. Like it's those little like someone can't sweep your feet, like those little things like that, especially like the hand itching for the money and your ears ringing somebody's talking about you. So it was always interesting to me. I guess the first question I have is you're you're growing up in this sort of like uh

trickle down effect country as place, do you believed? Because it's it's it's a major city. It's yeah, yeah, but I do comedy and I'm reductive. But it's also I grew up in Atlanta and Miami. Yeah yeah, so most of my childhood is like my child was split up, Nigga. I learned how to twark when I was nine. You understand, I've been dancing the Uncle Luke. I've been popping it and listen, you wonder why I'm so good at it though I could never I could never master the rolex.

That's the dance I could never figure. I could never get right. But I okay, I mean listen to some old school Miami SHEI. You don't know who DJ Uncle Owl is either. What I'm saying is that it's you had me and Uncle Luke, well a few uncles. Not about the sixty nine boys, but so it's Atlanta and Miami, so it's Georgia and then niggas that lived in Georgia, so it's these It's the same kind of all of the little sayings that you get. But everything is just

slight lean. I guess just being a Southerners thing, just being slightly superstitious. M I don't know if other black people from other parts of the country are like is you know, I think, I think because so much of our origins in this country are rooted in the South, even if we didn't grow up that like you know, like my family in some ways is of the South.

They just I grew up in Chicago, my mom's from Detroit, but a lot of their lineage and the ship before that is Southern, which means like, yeah, superstition is alive I think in almost every black household, where like something a motherfucker believed a hundred years ago has continued to be a thing in your house even if they ain't there anymore. That's true, But yeah, that was always thought was the ringing of the ears? Or do you believe it? Though?

That was the big question you have. You have you kind of have you proven it before? Because I feel like with most shit like that, you'll be like, yeah, but that happening and was ringing think of you know, like a speak of the devil or the other thing they would tell you, like seeing you had a necklace and the class came to the front, they would say

that somebody's talking about you. That's what that Now I've seen that be true, Whereas like the class being it's like somebody would walk up be like I I was like, oh yeah, you're right, so they would allays be making changing moving necklace back. But it's you know, speak of you know the term like speak of the devil and you real appear. But yeah, I've had it where like I thought my ears was ringing or you just like you just have those moments you're like, somebody's let's talk

about me. If you just have these little moment you're just thinking, it's like I'll just see somebody like, oh I was just talking about you the other day, and somebody'll say they were. You know, it's usually and it's a good thing. Yeah, it's because if it was, because if they talking shit, they're not gonna tell you. But don't in in its original like pitch. Was it pitched to you as a good thing or is it pitched to you as a potentially harmful thing? They there wasn't

any context given. It was just if your ears are ringing, you know, if you haven't been hitting the fucking head, you know, because if my ears are ringing, but also I'm like I might be concussed, but yeah, yeah, if I've not been hit in my head, then you know, someone's talking about you, right, Okay, I would never give nor bad. It just is somebody might be talking about you, right, so you you sort of believe this or you at

least seen it happen. When you say talking about you, I assume it's not just like in the immediate sense. It's not just like a motherfucker in the room is talking about you. That was my question, is what's surprised? Yeah, like how far out does this does this ringing proliferate? It's anyone who's talking about you with any time anywhere.

M So it's just kind of a wave you just go, hey, my time about you, just just because it's like if you're it's just your name being wrung out, you know, I mean right, so it's like someone says your name and it's kind of like your bodies we have being like, okay, it's because I think sometimes it's I guess people want to believe that it does have a negative connotation because anytime we tell like, oh, somebody's talking about you, that phrase is never positive, right, But that might just be

our own shit, right right, your own shit. Because for me, if I hear my if my ears are like ringing or like tingling or something like that, and it's like, oh, somebody's talking about me. I don't ever think it's a negative thing. I don't think someone's sitting up talking cash shit. No, it's you know, when my friends are talking to each other. But like whenever I have those like, I don't ever think that if I'm being alerted to it, I don't

think anybody's saying anything bad. No, I take it personally. Every Yeah, I'm this motherfucker's trying to kill me. Hey man, you know what I U My thing is always a bad step off the porch. Bro not me. I'm like, you're trying to kill me, and I gotta escape this. You want to listen, come outside, all right, Well we need to take a We're gonna be back with more dolse a Sloan they didn't let me into like sixth grade, more dolz a Sloan and more. My mama told me,

why are you coming home? Something's going on? Can I smell yould dick sniff it? Indeed, we are bad ladies. Gentlemen, Crack the one you love and sniff them on the dick. This is that gave me a flashback to the Sky's mess, and I'm not gonna tell my own business. Sounds like I get assume part of it I had to do with Dick. I wasn't the one who was gonna be smelling what. Oh, I was the one who was going to be asking to smell it. I'll say that you

were creeping. I was not creeping. I was living my life. Oh you're gonna try to get out on that that technicality. Oh no, that's I'm not creeping if you come to my house. Exactly, he took the ring. Yeah, sure, I know. I know what he did wrong. I get it. In my defense, he never had a ring on. Ye know, that's how you believe me. Come on, I did not know until I saw him like a month later he had a ring on. I was like, um, when did you get married? And he's like, I was married the

whole time, thirteen years ago. Like that. I was like, really, listen, I've been asking God to send me a husband, and I think I need to be more specific. Yeah, yeah, you don't need a husband, you need someone to marry. I need my husband because yeah, exactly, I need a future husband. Ye excuse me, Lord from her last prayer. I just want to make an amendment because I think there's been a misunderstanding. Yeah yeah, I see seed. All the angels in the States, listen, come on site, spread

it around. So wait, So so now, Langston, you've haven't done some research? I love, I love that you're guiding us back. Good for you. I know I'm bad on a tangent, so I have to help, because friend, I did. I did a bunch of research on your conspiracy theory that i'd love to unpack with you. Let's start with obviously, this we've already talked about it as a superstitious. It's a bit of an old superstition. But I will say that, at least in my opinion, superstitions are really just conspiracy

theories before the Internet. Like I think that's just motherfucker's doing what they could with their conspiratorial brains when they also had to like churn, buttering, fucking you know, wash those shirts in the fucket. I also think it was a way to just keep people safe, like don't walk under a ladder. That's just see what I'm saying, Oh you get bad luck you're walking on a ladder? Calls

you could you also get fucking concussed? Yeah, you walked under a ladder, you know, right, don't step on a crack. I don't, don't. I don't know whose mother needed a chiropractic. I don't know about that one. I think. Also sometimes crashing the sideway sidewalk and it's uneven and you could trip. Yeah, you just falling. And back then medicine was like uh, having leeches suck your blood hammers. If you fall, you're gonna die, big dog could be done right. Yeah. Also,

mirrors were expensive. Glass was expensive. Break a mirror, you get bad luck because we will never see ourselves again. We had to save up for this one. Unless you had a pool of water, bitch, you'll never see your own face, which you probably did have access to clean water. Yeah, that was probably it was probably just some superstition being like a bro. Don't. But you can't see the nuance. You can't see the nuance in the in the lake. You can't really, especially as dark as me. I can't

really see my face in the water. I need that glass. See why that is perfect? Boy? All right, man, I've just been drinking water, staying out of the way. The the first mention of this superstition, conspiracy theory, whatever, you want to call it comes from the Middle eight are actually way before the Middle Ages. Sorry. The first mention of this ringing at someone talk to you comes from Roman philosopher Pliny. Pliny. We're all big Pliny fans. The

elder the beer is named after him. Oh is that true? No? Okay, yeah, I thought were applies and I don't see Saturday. Yeah, Roman philosopher Applies and his work entitled the the Natural History Encyclopedia, which came out more than two thousand years ago. So this is a two thousand year old plus superstition that's according to the white man's history books, our Italian's

white Yes, ye, whoa god. This conversation was about to say, they'll try to get get out of it on a bunch of shit with that, But I'm not saying anything like that. I'm a big fan of the uh vodka sauces. Yeah, I love what you do with your noodles. Not listening, Hey, if it wasn't for I'll tell you this there, listen, I understand the spicy white I get it, y'all. Tan

It's fine. But because and I learned this recently, because of the discrimination that the Italians and the Irish were when they came in New York because I guess the old whites didn't want to fuck with the Catholic whites, right, So you know how Columbus came to be like a huge deal. Yeah, and the Columbus Day of Parade is a huge deal. It was basically Italians going, no, we contributed to see where the reasons, Oh, we've been here for a long time, where the reason you fuckers are here.

It's not just in Super Mario Mafia. Whoa, whoa, Hey, there's no there's who are um Listen, I don't I know some guys, you know, I like it's Coca cola, baby, Coca Cola. Yes, listen, we all love uh Aaron Chenies. So that was a whole deal where they're like, oh, we're not not Americans, listen, We're the reason America fucking exist. And then like America's named after America's best Pucci anyway, so it's like, yeah, listen, we've been here. So that

was the that was the propaganda campaign of that. So that's pretty tight though. That's good propaganda because they were like, hey, you don't get to escape us. We brought this cool rapist dude to your country. Yeah, yeah, we helped west. No, even though he's who America is named after. I always never understood that though, because if he wasn't the was he just a dude on the boat and they were like, yeah, this seems like you. The thing is, Columbus never hit

the continent of North and Southore. He was the reason they called it the West Indies. He's the reason we have the term Indians because he thought he was in fucking India. I heard, and I could be in wreck about this. I think he didn't touch it on his first trip. I think he went back and then later came to America after it had already been like yeah and like down other shit. But like, no, he wasn't. He never even made it here. That said, so this

it's two thousand years old. In the Middle Ages, people believe that ringing ears was a sign that angels were talking about you. Unclear if the angels were talking shit or talking positively, but it was an angel thing, which actually makes your your point. Don't say about the the devil potentially whispering your name. Feel like, oh, it's got a little bit of a tethering there, But yeah, the devil one scares me the most. Yeah, yeah, there's my name on the street all the time, and it's never

it's name. Okay, I guess maybe. Wait, Columbia is named after Columbia and then Columbia. Sorry, it just popped up dates back day, stop Langston or Dulce. I like it though, but I mean, but, like I say this, so I'm not named after a poet or a delicious street. But you know, listen, I had a neighbor named Dulce. At one point, my brother was dating a girl named Dulse. Really yeah, and she was like, you know, if we get married, me and you, if I marry your brother,

we'll have the same name. And I was like, we already have the same name. She's like, no, we'll have the same name. And I was like, oh fuck this. And I looked at my brother and I was like, hey, bro, your last name is gonna be right Reguez if y'all get married. Because I'm not playing this shit. That's pretty weird. You're not gonna have another situation. Get out of here. She's someone else. I just got used to this thing. You don't get to come up and double it, you know,

I a double down, double down. But I do think it's weird like they do say, like if you're in the Appalachians, like yo, if you hear your name, run in the opposite direction. Something's like calling you to try to you know, for you to no. I mean there's ghosts in the woods. Everybody knows that. Yes, now if everybody knows that, I do. Have you been in the woods alone, Lankesdon, I haven't. That's not a thing that I would ever because you're afraid of the ghosts. Absolutely.

I think I'm more afraid of wild animals and bad men. But but ghost, I guess, factory, I guess a little. Try to tell you, Borie, if you want to see like some wild shit. The Chicken Magua Battlefield in Tennessee is on the trail of tears. Oh yeah, see no no no, So I'm wondering can they see each other?

M m oh, like is there inter ghost beef? Not in But it's like the thing is if you because like one of my friends grow like lives in summer Mill, Georgia, and they just paved the trail of tears and made it the road and then wait the sign for it is even more disrespectful. It's like a road and then there's like a giant drop of water and then you see like a silhouette of a Native American man. It's very awful. But his house is literally on the trailer

of tiers. And so the Chickamago Battleville in Tennessee is on the trailer of tiers, and so it was like a it was a Civil War battlefield that's on the trail of tears. And I'm like, I wonder if they can see each other. That's too much bloodshed, I want to believe. And maybe this is me just being optimistic. I don't want to wish that on the Native Americans either.

They died, they went through enough. Hell yeah, I don't need them to like spend eternity looking at a bunch of like proud whites as a battle for a country that never was, you know what I mean? Like that for a white shooting each other over stuff that they don't. Yeah, you don't, they should. I don't want you know what, You're right, I don't want that for them. But have you talked about the wait you say, so it's not a harmony career? You support whites battling? Yeah, I don't

know all of the people that know about movies. But have y'all talked about black people believing in ghosts if you're talking about that conspiracy theory? Yet we have, we have talked a little bit about black people and often the lack of belief, I guess, and ghosts that I don't know, I don't it's every So the college that I went to was very haunted and the white girls

very haunted. There was a ghost tour that they would do, and there was a book written on the ghost at my college, very famous ghost, Agnes, and so I remember the white girls would always going try to find her, and they were trying to get the black girls to come, and we'd be like no, and they were like, why won't y'all go? And it's like whoa, Because once we're not fucking with her, she's not sucking with us. So they thought we wouldn't come because we didn't believe in ghosts.

We told it. We were like, we're not gonna go because we do. And I'm not a business girl off because like every black person I grew up with, because it's like my friends, like if I can belie even a holy ghost, I don't believe in his other fucking ghost At the same time. I mean, all the black people were growing up, everybody believe in ghosts. Nobody that didn't believe in ghosts. I didn't go to no Holy Holy ghost as church. Oh in that way, it was like,

I don't the motherfucker's pretending. So I think I believe in. I believe in. I mean this as far as yeah right, I'm just saying why. It was just like I just thought it was because, like you know, it's white people love fucking with ghosts and black people. I was like, no, I'm not. That's no, I believe I believe in leave stuff alone. Yeah, like I don't know that I'm actively

afraid that I'm surrounded by ghosts right now. But I do believe that if I showed up in my crib with Auiji board, some motherfuckers might answer me, do you know what I mean? And I don't want that, so I never board in my whole life. Yeah, a lot of white friends. Boy, really, No, I don't fucking touch that devil stick. Yeah go you're SLF black, but that they done it around you though, No, I don't fucking

where they're doing. I wouldn't hang out. I've I've had I've seen it and been like I gotta I gotta go. I would legit leave, I gotta go. You not that, but I can't be here. I can't be here. And I think it's very interesting because it's like there's just certain I think as a kid, they would tell us leave stuff alone, like don't call for nothing, don't ask for nothing, like don't ask for anything to come to you, because you don't know what will show up. So that

was the other. So it's like all of these little like it's like all files in the line of like these superstitious things. So it's like, you know, someone's calling your name as a devil someone, you're hearing your name, you know, your ears are ringing, someone's saying your name. Like there's all of these little things, like something trying

to get your attention. My daughter has, uh this this stuffed animal thing called Florence the flower Pot, and since she was born, I've pretended that Florence is a devil worshiper. I'll like do like a little voice and be like I'm Florence the flower Pot. I love Satan and like, you know, it's a fun little game for me and my wife, for you, for me and My wife gets furious every time I do it. She's like, hey, you

gotta you gotta stop. I would not so, dark lord, And she gets she gets furious, like bro, and I quit it. I support her, tell her and I support her fully, And if she ever needs me to punch you square in chest, I will do it. I don't love I don't love Satan. Florence love Satan like you were Florence. First of all, I'm not doing that. I'm not Florence. Who voice is Florence Langston? Who gives Florence a voice? I've never looked into it, but I promise

you who chose Satan for Florence? Florence shows it for us? Though she did she did her own research. What I bind you up in the name of Jesus, I'm buying a lace up in the name gonna protect his baby. Tell your life she has an ally. Tell her, I will pray against you. We called out fire on all of that knowledge. If it if it wasn't this, I'd be out having affairs with random women. I chose what I chose. This is, this is the passing. There are some kind of monster that another human has to deal with,

and at the end of the day. The monster I chose is giving satanic goals to a flower pot stuffed animal. I think that's pretty reasonable. W the grand scheme of things. You could have killed a guy. I could have been a murderer. I could have been a horror murderer, a horror murderer. Are you there are the murderer? No? Both of those things, well, only one of those things is a crime. I think sex work is work. Sex work is My question is are you so? Are you he

got bored? Is he murdering these ladies of the night? Are I think he? I think he's snuck in that he is also a whore. He took two bad traits instead of one, he snuck one. Yeah, so it sounds like it sounds like he's some kind of trick got renegade. Yeah, but really he's just he just sucks a lot and he kills people. Kill a lady or a man harder. It would be more helpful for you to kill a man. Yeah. Yeah, no argument or are you a more mark? Are you? I'm not. I'm not into the semantics of it all.

I'm in it for the sucking and the killing. Yo. Listen, Linkston, I realize we don't talk a lot, and so yeah, this is my personality. Yeah, this is this is what it's like. Honestly, this is the longest we've talked since what Yeah, this is where I'm at. Okay, I hate to break it to you, but this is what Listen. This is none. No, it is not. She's fine, She's fine, She's okay, Listen, Li's happy. No, no, I didn't say that she's fine. Listen. This is not my ministry, this

is none of my business. I'm just here to talk about the fact that my mama told me if my ears ringing, somebody was saw mounting to the to the point of returning to our again. I brought a fashion again. Lex is the one who took us on that. All right, I will not be berated on what used to be my podcast. Of course they'll say, took over. What do you mean I've made I told you I'm good for a tangent I am. I am so distracting. I cannot

emphasize enough how little any of this matters to us. Okay, good because I didn't want to take I didn't want to mess up. So one of the things that that scientists point to as science apparently has thoughts on this. They say that this ringing is not in fact someone talking about you, but is instead something called tonight. Is tonitis is the sensation of hearing buzzing, whistling, ringing, or other sounds that they may be high pitch or low pitch, vary in the type of sound produced, and one or

both ears may be affected by its. Yeah, so if you have tonight, that's like NonStop, right, it's all the time, isn't it. I thought it was all the time. It's I think that there are scales of it in terms of like what it can be. And in fact, they say that a lot of us actually have tonitis and don't because of the scales that it can be, are not as affected by it that we feel like, oh we have to like dog whistle, yeah, sort of like yeah, it's individual, you know what I mean? And a little

bit dog whistlettle. I know what you're doing. Yeah, is that Oh it's so high I can't hear it, or it's so low I can't wait, or you do hear it. But if you don't believe, no, I believe in those Oh you were saying, you don't know what I was saying. Is like tonight is where like you, it's sometimes it's at a point where you can't hear it, and I'm like, oh, I think it's more that it's it's either short enough

or faint enough that it doesn't affect your day. It's not that you don't hear it, it's just that it's like not fucking with you the way that like somebody with extreme tonight IS would be like, bro, if I don't go see a doctor about this, I am going to go crazy, right, But if you live in a city, you can't hear shit. So it's like I could have tonight is, but if I'm walking around New York all the fucking time, I don't know nothing. You see what I'm saying. So it's like if you live somewhere, they

just be wanting to have stuff to do. This just sounds stupid, Like they say that high blood pressure blockage is in the ear and hedge trauma or even stress can cause it. So maybe some of that is related to the the stress that one would experience all day people talking about me when I'm not all these people loving me and be alive. Heck, where is David Bory in the world? Oh, he's great. We love boys and my ears is a hot line right now. Everybody loved me.

That sounds like that sounds exactly like boryads out here talking about me. They loved him some Bory. There are a bunch of people who are in my research, are are on the much more spiritual end of the spectrum and a crunchy spiritual. If that's interests you all at all, like it, it's there are a bunch of people in these like sort of ethereal articles that suggests that ringing is actually the result of someone's connection to a higher spiritual plane, that like, in essence, your your ears are

crossing the Jesus multiverse as it were. When that ringing is happening, I realize I'm spiritual. People ain't never talking about Christian God. They're talking about they're talking about Because the thing is, I remember seeing this VI. I saw this meme one day and it really it just it really just made me take pause because it was like y'all out here talking about y'all spiritual demons or spirits too, And I went, yeah, that's that Sammy Davis Junior ship

exactly who you're talking to? What do you mean? I just the thing is, it's like, I'm not I just need clarification on something, because it's like, if we're talking about different planes, different planes of existence, that makes sense to me. We all dream, okay, yeah, we all have dreams, we all feel like you know, we all have intuition, we've all been in momentary just like, hey, something is off, something is wrong, and you've been right about that. So

I'm not saying it's not valid. What all I'm saying is, if you're talking to me about spirituality, who are we talking to you just want clarification. Is if it's that that Jesus talker, this is that sweet Mohammed, Like, where are we at? Listen? I love abraham religion. That's the same. Listen. I ain't got no problem to Abrahamic religion. Okay, moms, okay, just about her day actually, so um yeah, Abrahamic religions. I don't know. Everybody got listened. We all got noah,

Hey what we all doing the same thing. Certain Abraham had many sons, many suns. Okay. But what I'm saying is I just want to understanding because like I hear this thing about well, I'm not religious, I'm spiritual. I'm like, what does that mean? And then no one can ever give me an answer. That usually means I know I'm

not a Christian. Yeah, I like, I'm not comfortable telling my mom that I don't think her belief in Jesus is as real as she thinks it is, So I just say, Also, I'm like, I'm kind of too pussy to commit to one religion. Yeah, I don't want to read your agnostics because it's like I do think it's an interesting concept. We're just like there's something I just think pick nobody yet, Like I don't think that there's like I'm not ascribing to boom boom boom boom boom

boom boom, Like what is Zoroastrianism? What I am? I mean, I think it's like a precursor to Christianity as far as like the construct of it, right, I will say that that. I I think that part of the reason I have trouble with Christianity at least out how it was introduced to me is like it's not that I'm like scared to commit to some shit. I just think

my brain is too limited to even understand what God is. Like, I think it's to me Christianity is like the best we could come up with with articulating what is far more complex than our brains could even manage. So we made it human and white or whatever the fuck it is because we have bias and frankly shit imaginations compared to what it is. It could well if you look at ever, you know, everyone has a creation story because everyone had to go. Okay, I don't know how we

got here. Something, somebody did something for us to get here. So every you know, major even it's you know, whether it's a creation story that's not Christianity, it could be an indigenous story from any group of people on the planet who didn't co signed to you know, any of the Abrahamic religions or you know, any of the other schools of thought that we have because we can't because

we had science. But science still has a concept of the Big Bang, meaning even you break down all of these things and carbon dating all this other stuff, the big Bang still is. We really don't know. We're just shout out to young Sheldon, okay, shot out to Laurie

Metcalf out here just really giving us work, miambiolic. So I think the idea of it is like, I think that it's interesting that humans have to know how we got here, because I think that's a because that's the thing I'm saying for me personal, I'm not really worried about the comings or goings. It's sort of just like what you're gonna do with it while you got it. I really don't write. I'm not stressed about some creation story.

I don't know how we got here because we're here. Yeah, But I think that's you being a more centered person than the average human is. I think most of you like, yeah, we're just scratching at the side of a fucking you know, cup and hoping we can like claw our way out of whatever this is. I don't need for me, I don't need to know. I don't well, the thing is for me. It's like, I don't need to know how we got here, and I don't think I need to

know what happens after we die. Figure it out one way or another regardless, because the thing is you live. Because like one thing I always have been confused about it is like the term like life is short, right, but being alive is the longest thing in any any individual, any creature. Being alive is the longest thing you'll ever do. It's gonna be longer than any job. It's gonna whether you're alive, no, I'll be I'll be dead longer than

I was alive. Right, but that's relative to other people knowing about your existence, right, right, right, So your body is only alive for as long as it's alive. You see what I'm saying. You got what you've got. So if you're a long if you're alive for a day, or if you're a life for a hundred years, that is how long your life is. Yeah, stop bitching about your life. Fruit flies, You got what you got. You're gonna die when you die. And get out of my kitchen.

Okay chen, Yeah one, but I bought one, Banannah. Get off from my fucking apples. Get off my fruit, you assholes. How did you even get in here? I wash this fruit, you bad you pineapple out for like twenty seconds. It's got seventeen fruit flies. It's so rude. You got to put don't try to put in the bacons on the thing. Listen by the pineapple chunks. Now, I don't even don't let that life. Don't let that life, because the thing is, you gotta put the tahine and the lime juice on it. Anyway,

now you look different than me. What do you mean You've lifted your can California currently you can buy it from the store like that. Now for me, I like it. Give me plain old missionary pineapple. I like it. I like to lay on my pineapple and look at dead in the eye the way God intended, honestly, honestly listened. I would have thought, I honestly, when I imagine you're laying with this pineapple, I thought it was on top of you. No, Sometimes I like to let the apple

sit on my face, just to switch it up. I do the work for pine apple. Okay, okay, I hear that. I hear that. Like I said, I'm bid for a tangent. We've got very superstitious. So what else did the spirituality say? Yeah, this went crazy, We're helping. I will say that the last piece of information I'll give you before we shut this thing down. There were a number of other signs that someone is thinking slash talking about you that came up.

Examples including hiccups apparently are a sign mid meal discomfort, unexpected emotions, eye twitching, and my personal favorite, hearing your name feels like the most obvious, but they were like, yeah, if you hear your name, somebody probably talking about I do think it's interesting that we've created a way that we've made sure that even a little thing can give us like an interconnectivity to another person who's not there dead.

I think that's what's more about that anything. I think that's like what also, fuck hiccups, kind of truly fuck ups. I'm I'm I don't I don't even want to say it out loud. I'm on a streak. What what you mean. I haven't had a probably over a year. God damn im. I'm whispering it because I don't want to suck it up my home. I needn't tell me the best way

to get rid of them. You get so you need another person to do this, but you have somebody like put their hands over your ears because you know your ear, nose, and throat are all connected, right, highlight your boy. So look at boy having insurance and so but the real anti doctors of the niggas that don't take insurance. Where you got to come to the door and need we

know where's that? That's real, dude. So you've ever been sent over to one of those celebrity e NT doctors where they don't take insurance or you don't know where their office is at. No. No, oh yeah, y'all don't. Okay, I'm sorry. Ye see, we have the same insurance. We all have to we all have the same insure, but they don't take insurance. Period. I didn't even him. And then you go to your insurance company and be like, can I have some of my money back? No, I

don't do that. I didn't even know. I go to where my insurance suggested I go. And that's why my body only works kind of. Yeah, this dude's like the guy it was referral only, like I had to get a referral from I think it was from Trevor from Roy for me to even get this motherfucker's like because the lady was like hello, like one of the doctor's offers answered the phone. Hello, No, that's usually so sweet. And I was like and I was like this is doctor and she was like yes, And I was like okay,

I'm like who are you referred by? And then I told her. She's like okay, you can make an appointment, but like she was like, bitch, I don't know again anyway, put the hands where Oh he had plaques from a racket. He had plaques and ship from like he had a huge thing from Rick Cares, like five feet wide with all her albums in it. But yeah, he had a thing from Michael Bolton on the other way. So he worked on Mariah Carry's throat and then she was like, here, Doc,

have my platinum plaques. You can hang them in your office. She had them because like it was like because Michael Bolton had the biggest one, and it's like somebody walked in and was like, huh, let me add six inches on each side because Mariah Carries right behind and it was like, you know, a little bit bigger. But it was like, you know, her albums and stuff laid out, Michael Bolton's his albums laid out. There was like um autographs from people. He was at the Grammy's rip Rihanna

making sure that she was straight. Isn't he plays? So he says, no, that is crazy. No, it's it is wall to wall people like thank you, thank you, thank you. He's got signed albums covers and shit, thank you, thank you, thank you. This man's held job anyway, So the hiccups so you put the hands over their ears, right, and then you have somebody else do it. They put their hands like almost creating like a suction. Maybe so, but you can't hear nothing. And then you drink water for

thirty seconds. Whoa, so the hands so someone else's hands is over your ears. It's hard, like just pressing down. So so it just like creates a suction. And then you drink water for thirty seconds. That feels like that feels like that could go wrong somehow, like you do that at school and somebody ends up dead. You know what I mean? Yeah, no, I don't know all of it's connected. I don't like it. You can't breathe for your ears, don't. I don't like it, y'all. I think

it's the same concept of your sharks, sharks. It's a note for me, sharks. It's like, you know, like when you want your ears to pop on a plane, you have to like swallow or chew gum. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you. Makes sense, So listen. I just hope I helped. I think I think you did phenomenal work today. I think yeah, I think thanks, friends, Could you tell the people at home where they can find you and what cool shit you have going on. You can find me on al Gore's Internet at dulsay sloan dot com.

Also on all the socials. I just got TikTok Oh what a place to be. TikTok is wild. Oh you learned, I've learned so much. Also, I'm on Samoan TikTok man, I gotta get a flight. Damn nigga's bad anyway, Okay, that's a whole that's a whole other episodek on the tiktoks um. But yeah, I'm on the TikTok on Instagram. I got show us coming up, so please keep an eye out for that and me and late Flair. We have a lip gloss line coming out called Giggle Bloss.

So keeping out fair please may or may not be. Man, it's for everybody, Bory, if you want that makes me feel like it's nine. What you mean? I made a straight up lip class. But if you you're gonna have me out here looking a little too juicy, but you already out here being juicy, Bory, live your best life. I'm flat. I'm a flat bomb man. Everybody knows that. You know what, Bory, We will figure it out. We will figure it out. We'll get you a bomb if

you need a bomb. I just want to chapstick the taste could well, I don't know no about no chapstick like you know what I'm saying. I just want because my lips get listen. Listen well before your lips get gorgeous. Could you tell the people where they can find you? Sit you have going on? Find me on Instagram and cool Guy Jokes eighty seven. All my dates and stuff will be up there. They're ever changing, but I appreciate

you very much. Hell yeah, and as always, you can find me at Langston Kermit on all platforms, and I do have some dates coming up. April fifteenth, I'll be in uh in San Diego at mic Drop, and then April twenty eighth and twenty ninth, I'll be in Bloomington, Indiana at the Comedy Attic. Y'all should come out. It'll be fun shit And as always, you can spend send

us your conspiracy theories, your your thoughts. You can tell us what flavor of lip gloss Boris should should purchase from Giggle Gloss and you can send all that to my Mama pod at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you. That's it my bit. Look if you hate cops just because of the cops, the next time you get in trouble call a crackhead because bandies, my crop chips in your panties. O Koala bears are racist, the host, the players, morney versions inventing turney stuff. I can't tell me