Why what the fuck is up? Chicago?
Fuck yeah, Island Boys, Island Boys, Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me, The podcast when we dive deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories.
And we finally worked approve hold on, I got a good one.
We finally worked to prove that Tyler Perry was not born but instead was genetically engineered in a lab.
From the severed foot of Big Mama from Soul Food.
That might be my favorite one.
They put that lab, they put it in some juice and they let it simmer, and we got Tyler Perry.
That's a sweet, sweet foot.
That that foot tastes like marmalade. How how is everybody?
You guys?
Okay? Fuck yeah for being here. This is so cool.
I'm Langston Kerman and this is if you're if you're unfamiliar, some of you feel unsure of what you've walked into.
And that's okay, that makes sense.
This is not this is a stupid thing that you've participated in.
It's dumb.
We host the We host a podcast called My Mama Told Me where we we unpack some of the most stupid and offensive conspiracy theories circulating in the black community.
Led. Yeah, that's amazing.
That's our that's our ship. Round of applause.
If you've heard the podcast before, Okay, I love that. There's a bunch of people clapping, and then there's one dude standing there and he's.
Like, nah, is just a.
He's a huge insecure fan.
Well then you see my booty hole loosen up, losing up.
Yeah, my mom's seen it. Now what she think? She loves the show?
All right, fair enough? Uh, the way this is gonna work.
We have we have some phenomenal guests that are joining us on. We have some really fun games that we want to play with you, the audience. It's really gonna be a real free for all of stupid ship. And all we ask of you is that you loosen the fuck up and have fun.
Just get drawn.
Don't be tight, because that we don't need that ship.
Yeah, white guy in the corner, you know about it.
Come on. We like to point out all our whites as they walk in.
Get them.
We should we kick it off.
I'm excited about this first one very much.
Yeah, we have We wanted to kick off with a with a. We wanted to kick off with the dudzy of a conspiracy theory, one that that I personally have covered in the very very early episodes of the podcast, but I've never gotten to talk to Bory about it, and and frankly, I think there's a lot that needs to be said about this conspiracy.
I have so many feelings.
Yeah, okay, so we'll kick it off right away.
My mama told me that if you eat spaghetti from a strange woman, she might put a hex on you.
How do you look at first of all, I'll eat spaghetti from anyone. Yeah, don't.
Is that true? You don't give a ship where your spaghetti comes from.
I refuse to eat spaghetti restaurants is my only thing. WHOA, Yeah, I won't eat it. That's home food.
Okay, you know it's like we ate it so much at home.
I'm not trying to go out and pay money.
For You're not gonna pay I'm not a fucking idiot. My mama could make this.
Yeah, I'm not gonna I'm gonna pay for your spaghetti this cause eighty eight cents?
Are you? I don't think that that's accurate.
For a pack of spaghetti.
I look, I'm not a spaghetti man.
I don't.
I can tell. I don't want to be.
I don't want to be one of those elitist people who doesn't know how much milk costs.
But I feel like it's more than eighty eight.
Then it's like it's like a dollar twenty. Man, spaghetti's the cheapest noodle. Well, I can't argue it. Don't be like that, you know that. Don't be like that. It's spaghetti and then ramen.
It's it's so cheap. You think you think spaghetti is more less expensive.
Than round unless you're eating the blue box for totally like some kind of mischianopoly man. Yeah, that's it's for the bag. I'm talking about the bag spaghetti that's.
Cheap at hell.
Damn. Yeah, I don't, I don't. I'll be honest. I don't really fish.
I don't really funck with the I don't really fuck with my spaghetti in a bag.
Don't do that to me. Don't do that to me. Do not do that to me.
I do like certain containers.
Don't everybody's eating it in a bag?
I have sure, But after the point that I stopped having to eat cereal in the bag, I was like, no more bags, any any food.
I'm done with bag. Well, I guess that's why I'm a man of the people. You over here a hoity toity on box spaghetti mountain.
I really, I really rode in on my spaghetti horse when I came in.
I might as well have your peaky in the air, talking like the bag.
Yeah, I don't know that I've I had thought about this until it was introduced as a conspiracy theory, and now it's all I think about when I eat any kind of red sauce base.
Yeah. So, I because I didn't grow up with Did you grow up here in this? First of all?
No, not at all.
My my father who's here tonight, he's here and he's a white man.
Uh.
I told you we call out our whites. I could tell because he waved with two hands. That's how you know.
But but that's not a that's not a common conspiracy theory I think that circulates.
Is it for for our whites? Is that a thing that you all had heard not to eat?
No, that's not a thing that that you I think it's a very specific.
That makes sense because I will also say, and this is gonna sound kind of bad, I don't believe in white women knowing magic does that right, Like like if a white like, if a white lady is like I'm a witch, You're like, okay, whatever, bitch, wow, But I am more apt to believe it from a black woman.
That's fair, right, Yeah, I.
Don't think it's and it's not a bad thing.
It's just how I feel like because you know, many believes in white which right, No, that's yeah, they're they're that's somewhat fair.
Yeah, like Regina's specter now no, but yeah, yeah, that bitch is a witch for sure.
You don't dressed like that.
If you don't have magic in your life, Yeah, you have nothing but turbans.
Yeah you're away, come on, come on.
Yeah. Okay.
So, for those that are unfamiliar with this conspiracy theory, part of what the the conspiracy is is that by receiving spaghetti from a woman who you do not know, she may put her menstrual blood inside.
Of the dish.
It's gotta be spaghetti, yeah, I guess, yeah, you're gonna notice. Yeah, like, why is this feduccini this color?
Did you make this with vodka sauce? I don't understand, but yeah, So in theory, she is putting her menstrual blood into the spaghetti and the hecks. The supposed hecks is one that has the potential to make you fall in love with her, that you will somehow magically fall in love with this person from her her pussy spaghetti.
Oh, ain't you saying it like that?
I'm just trying to be technical here, dog.
I feel The first thing I feel about this is if you're going to the lengths to cook for me and put menstrual blood in.
It, Yeah, maybe I should fall over it.
Why you're very caring.
Honestly, the mistral blood would make it taste good.
Yeah, that's one of those eleven herbs and spices. Papa's is always bragging about.
We're calling upon you because we have new merch. We have very exciting merch that we are now selling and it's it's fucking great. We love it so much.
Just sleek, it's sexy.
Come on, you want to tell them what we have?
Yeah, we have three different types of hats, which is really fun. We have a two tone hat, an alien dad hat, the traditional logo in black and khaki. Then we have the enamel pen with the alien who has a cooofie on it. Since my mama told me. And then we have t shirts that say proud little Mama, which is who you are.
Yeah, you can buy the merch now, go to my mama told me dot merch table dot com. It's a brand new name, but it's a se merch and we would love for you to get some if you haven't got it already, and we want you to have all the sweet stuff, so get it.
You know what.
The craziest thing to me about this conspiracy theory is like, when did black people start making spaghetti?
M Right, Like, well, there there is and I think this is fair to say there is a massive difference between black people's and white people's spaghetti.
We can all agree on that.
And and for those that are unfamiliar, if you're not sure what the difference is, it's truly a difference in number of pots. I think that's the core difference is Black people absolutely refuse to use more than one pot when they make spaghetti, and white people are like eight pots.
Spaghetti can't be made without.
All those pots.
But yeah, so that's my first question is like it makes me feel like then this has to be like a fairly recent conspiracy, right.
Well, actually, I remember doing a little bit of research on this, and it's not as recent as you would think.
I think that.
There is a pretty vast history of menstrual blood and or like parts of our bodies being used for for hexes, for magic, love potions, whatever it may be. And so be it hair, be it, menstrual blood, be it. I think toenails and fingernails were a part of the possible options.
But all I would not fall in love with that. That seems less.
Just a little foot crunch.
Yeah, it doesn't seem like it comes from the same place.
Well, that is the Other part of it is that not all of it is intended for a love potion. Some of it is like hate potions and like curses and shit.
I mean, I wouldn't eat food from somebody I hate.
Yeah, but maybe they hate you and you don't know it.
My biggest fear.
By round of applause, who who here believes in this conspiracy?
Who actively refuses.
You?
You're you absolutely refuse to eat the spaghetti of a stranger?
Fuck?
Yeah?
And has it always been this way? Who gave you that that line of thinking? Your grandma told you that, and you are like, you're right, Grandma.
That's literally the premise of this podcast. You can't shave him for that.
Even mind the premise is loose and it's stupid, So yes, I can tooch. Yeah, so your grandma tells you this, you're like, absolutely, and you've never questioned it since.
And and have you fallen in love ever? Okay?
And but he chose it, and.
But maybe you didn't and you don't know, maybe there was a Okay, you're right, you're right, fair enough, I'm putting the pressure in your head there, you know, like, bitch, did you curse me?
What's in this chili?
Here's my real question about it. Have you ever turned down spaghetti for that reason? Like been at somebody's house and they're like, oh, do you want some spaghetti?
And you're like, no way, bitch, try to trap me.
Whoa that they were trying to heck all you and all your high school creds, damn the whole basketball team.
I love that this is coming from a nigga dress like Ericabadu.
He got a shark tooth on his neck.
Of course, he ain't eating nobody else's spaghetti.
If ever, there was somebody in here who was like it was gonna be him.
Yeah, that is true.
Damn So no spaghetti ever from a stranger. When and this is I guess the biggest question. When you do fall in love, when you've made your chosen partnership, are you then will you take.
A lot of pressure on whoever? He said?
Well? Is this your person? Is this your your partner?
Fuck? Yeah?
Okay?
Do you eat?
And I don't mean to point you out, but are you now eating spaghetti that she makes? Or are you still like we ain't here yet. We gotta let's keep getting to know each other before spaghetti becomes due.
No spaghetti for the first six months.
I'll fuck you, but I ain't gonna eat your spaghetti. I eat you, but but not just spaghetti. You're being crazy.
I mean, if we're talking about this, ultimately I fall under the cat.
I love this.
I think this is a great conspiracy you and once again I I don't know, man, weirder shit has happened than someone casting a spell.
Right, So, if I'm hearing you correctly, you're saying that that, despite the possible risk, you're still down to clown on some spaghetti.
That's not you know, That's not what I'm saying.
I'm saying that I believe that this could be a possibility. I still don't eat spaghetti outside of the home, so it'd be you're gonna have to come to my house and make spaginning.
I got you if I'm gonna get caught.
It is worth It is worth noting, uh that David is currently on a tour called bring David a Plate.
That's true, where he.
Is literally asking audience members to show up with a plate that they've made at home.
It sounds so disrespectful what you said. It's a cool idea, it's a right idea. The other day and the food it's fair.
And now we're love with that man from Houston.
The other day, a very nice man in Houston gave us a pound cake that that and we we both ate ours privately at midnight and then and then next about did each other like bro, I feel different.
The first sex that got from LExEN like just as I had finished it was like twelve or four.
It's just all caps. That cake.
It changed me.
It was amazing, it was. But you could have got us. Yeah, and now I'm not gonna eat any spaghetti.
On this tour.
You're not gonna eat any spaghetti.
Any spaghetti people.
But you you are, you do.
At least appreciate that this is a real thing that could happen.
Yeah, I like this one. I like this. How do you feel about it?
I think I'll eat whatever. Man, Really, I don't think. I think at this point, let life happen.
I don't know.
I like that because that's what I'm saying about this whole thing is like, is there worse things? If? If it works, it works it.
Listen, If spaghetti's what tears my marriage apart, so be it.
That's what you say, That's how I lost my first one.
No, I do I think I feel similar to you. I like that this exists.
Yeah, I don't understand the uh, the realities right like.
Because it's like, who if it's not spaghetti, you eat a lot of things and you fall in love with people, you know what I mean. If it wasn't spaghetti, it was her macaroni and cheese that did it.
Like, there's many things that could do that. Fuck. Yeah, I don't think the mentrual blood part is that great.
But no, it's it's pretty icky.
But it sounds like, uh that there's a lot of bodily fluids and substances that could have an effect on you, so like you can't.
You can't spend your life in fear.
So go ahead and eat that spaghetti forget free yourself, mister Badu, free yourself.
Did we do it?
I think we did it. I think that was prettyo.
We like to just kick it off with the little samplers so that everybody feels nice and comfy.
I think you get the premise of what this.
You know how far we're gonna go.
Yeah, well you don't, but you think you do. And that's nice.
That's true. It's gonna get back. Doesn't grow chips in your names.
A Kuala bears are racist, the hostal layers, money, ships and turkey stuff.
Y'all can't tell me