Finger Lickin' Dead (with Will Miles)

Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me, the podcast where we died deep deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories and we finally work to prove that L. L. Cool J keeps his formal paper boy hat on while he has sex, forward when it's missionary, backwards when he's doing something a little naughty, and then sideways when he's letting his wife get in that button, you know what I mean, whatever direction in space,

and that's the type of horny LLL. Cool J is that guy loves a paper boy hat. It doesn't matter how ridiculous he looks. He will keep the paper boy hat on. I am your host, Linkston Kerman, I am. I'm excited to be here today. My guest, Oh what a guest. He is one of my favorite people on this here planet Earth. So funny. You know him from from Sherman's Showcase, you know him from from south Side. You know him more importantly from the after party show

from south Side that we did together. It was called cool by the Lake, and it didn't get enough views because of Viacom and they're goddamn paywall. But you gotta believe it was the best thing he and I have ever done together, and we'll never get to do it again. He's hilarious. A dear friend. Give it up for Will Miles. Oh ship, thank you, thank you. If you're out there, go watch the after show right now. Go watch it right now. Turn off this episode. What do you listen

to this bullshit for Cooler by the Lakes? What you need to be watching be the twelve thou and one viewer? I say one now. Also, that's right. I like that. I like that you changed, and I like that about you. You're a father and then you just throughout regular grammar. Yeah, I do it different now when your daddy you can say you know whatever. Yeah, I think I said daddy. I'm only being allowed to be called dad. That's my news hard stance. Oh you're not doing daddy. I don't

think I want to do daddy. I'm like, you know what, it's got such a weird I don't want to like you know, right, So you people are like, uh talking to her, and they'll be like your daddy. I'm like, no, no, no, I'm her dad. Just this is a very formal relationship. We hands all right, none of that bullshit. I want her getting too familiar with me. This is this is mostly business. I'm excited you're here today. You came to us with a conspiracy theory that I think a lot

of us have held for years. But so many of us, I think, are afraid to say it out loud because of what it's It might imply about our own lives, about the things that we would lose in our own experiences. But you said, my mama told me fast food restaurants are strategically placed in the hood to keep black people complacent and kill them at a faster rate. Absolutely, it's without a doubt true. It's the one thing where you're like, you know what, that is categorically undenied. There's no way

to refute this, right, like liquor stories, sure everybody knows that. Yeah, gun stores at Chappelle's joke goes, everybody knows that. But it's uh, fast food as well as where you're like, yo, only food is burger king what's going on? It's not even just the placement of them, it's the removal of all other options that makes it so fucking tyrannical, where it's like, god, damn, I can't eat nothing but mc nuggets. Yes, this is evil. Put a lettuce like, put a mixed

You've seen that for a mixed over there. Put a mixed in Englewood, how about that? Let me just let me see what a toss salad could do for my knees. Grilled chicken. Also, salad shouldn't be the suspensive anyway you know you're getting over. Make them reasonably priced in Let's all right, let's let's talk a little bit about where this comes from for you, because I think to your point, it's something we've noticed, right, you notice that you see

it out in the world. When do you feel like you first caught wind of this or did somebody say it to you that then triggered your third eye opening on this ship, it's things you noticed it should you hear adults talk about where You're like, I can't get a good food around here, and you're like, okay, that's

just something adults say every now. And you're like, you start to notice neighborhoods you go to because by like what six or seven, we had moved to, uh, you know, like a townhouse north side of Chicago, so thinks a little bit different. So we were like, I got to see what you know, restaurants are everything. Oh wait wait wait you get to sit down in this way. Oh oh, it's like this is like a real this is every Every place is fancy when you're a kid, So you're like,

any Applebee's is fancy. It's like they got regular ship. Did you know they let you color on the napkicks? This place? This is something else. Then Bennigan's was the height of luxury when I was like, you know, throughout childhood, and you know, I was trying to explain to someone the other day is ruby Tuesdays yeah, yeah. I used to think Ruby Tuesday was like the fucking hell yeah, if you got if we got to go there, this

is a big deal. They had like a more like uh sexy salad bar than the other like Fast Foo or whatever, those buffet styles and their fast food that was on like the the promo items that they had, like look at our salad bar. Don't forget we got a salad bar. And then listen, they weren't lying that salad bar was something else. It was I added as

an adult. Me and Mike Lawrence went we both had this job on some pilot that didn't go through obviously, and you know pilots don't go through for comedy Uh, it's weird that they just keep coming up in failed projects. It's almost like there's a there's a theme here. I wonder what could be the issue? Well, there's no way to unpack that. This Conspiracy Theory podcast could never figure out what's happening with these Comedy Central projects that they

always go halfway and then like, man, what happened? We were having fun, but that was one of those shows where I was like, yeah, we're having fun, but we could kind of tell earlier in that one that we're like, you know, this probably won't be a thing. So we just started to take advantage of the lunch options around there, and it was like red Lobster, Ruby Tuesdays and like the counter, the burger spot, it's delicious. Yeah, it was like we were in Times Square basically, so we went

to the Times Square Tuesdays. Wait a minute, Okay, that's that needed its own context, because that's that is not the same thing as going to the counter in any other situation or the Red Lobster in any other situation. The for those of you that have not experienced the Times Square at it's I guess that it's always But

Times Square is is mayhem and chaos of nothing. But people who don't know how to be outside like public and all can sort of like meeting in a singular place to like destroy the goodness of America and American values. I mean that's true. We've all done shows that Caroline's the audience. They could be great, but they can also be a reflection of the neighborhood sometimes. Yeah, but it is like, yeah, it's it's a dance. There used to be students over there, which is weird. It doesn't even

look like it now. It used to be the prositudes. They just don't post up anymore. They walk they wear Spiderman outfits. Right, yeah, it's a it's a proses who dressed up like Dora the Explorer. But you just gotta know, if you tap on the skull twice, she'll take that off. You should take something else off too. She looks like, oh, that's terrible. You finished the joke on this show. You finished the goddamn joke on this show. When she sucks, she also looks at the Cameron says, do you like to?

That's why we do it. This is the art. Okay. So you you start noticing sort of this trend the fast food restaurants, I know, in in your initials sort of like theorizing or a conversation about this. You had a theory about certain restaurants in particular, you felt like some of them were more criminal than others in their in their behavior. Absolutely, and uh one in particular because so my aunt, my great aunt used to live on

Stony Island sixties six. So we go around there and I see the food options and there's like, you know, there's Docks, which is like a small fast food restaurant, fish place, and then there's like a b J's and stuff, and like you know that's actually new, but back then it was something else. But they're there's stuff around their heralds and ship that you're like, this is good fast food.

But then it's the same thing, like the same exact restaurant that is so close to Morehouse, Spellman and clark Land University in Atlanta that it became obvious it's criminal is Popeye's, because like, why, first of all, why is papaeae? Is that good? For one, sure, it's it's very clearly delicious chicken. If it is chicken, it's it's clearly not like you know, regular chicken. Yeah, And to that point, you're light years ahead of your competitors, right, It's not

like KFC is is right on your tail. And so you gotta constantly be working on these uh seasons, these herbs and spices to make sure that you're you're able to beat out KFC. Nobody fucking likes KFC. They're chickens wet when it's supposed to be dry. It's nobody's a fan. And then churches, churches tastes like the mistakes that that KFC and Papae has made and then they just go and pick it up in a big like a basket and then bring it back to their restaurant. So your

competitors are out of the window. So why are you working so hard to make this delicious chicken constantly? Like up until this year. It's like you guys could have taken a break, but you know, sandwich time, like what you were already. Let's like, uh, Hussain Bolt being like, let me get faster. It's like, come on, you beat it, man, you beat the game. What do you need to keep doing this for? I need to get ten seconds faster

than the next nigger. That's what I know. But especially by Morehouse and uh, because the thing is they put all HBCUs. Everybody knows it's in the hood, so you know we're in the middle of the hood as well. And it's like, you know, the some of they will be some of the most powerful black people in the world at some point. Right now, they're just broadcast other parts of the country. Kamala, look at come on, look at and then look at me products HBCUs. We are important.

We are the same. I inspire people. Yeah, what was also a cop at one point, and uh takes a lot of pride in it. Hey proud of being a prosecutor. And I thought I was doing the good thing. But but yeah, So it's one of the best food options in that area by school, and it's where everybody always goes. I mean, they did the KFC scene in school days, but it's really Popeyes like that CANFC is the other way,

but it's it's also not very good. The red beans and rice, great fucking mashed potatoes with the Cajun gravy. First of all, who doesn't love New Orleans. Everybodys New Orleans unless New Orleans has never heard anybody know the hoodoos. It's got nothing but curses and buddhoo. But everyone's like, yo, I'm gonna go every day every year. Who am I to miss out on the opportunity to be cursed by

a strange lady. So I will say that that I think I don't know that I grew up thinking that pop Eyes was the most uh egregious offender of of like sort of attacking black people. But I also think that that's such a regional thing that to your point, you're like referencing all these you know colleges, like the black colleges that you're you're aware of, and so you're sort of like tracking it that way. And for me,

it was like McDonald's was everywhere. It was like literally every direction I turned in White Castle, it was McDonald's and White Castle when I was a kid that like you you couldn't go without seeing a white castle in the hood, that there was a white castle there. Well, and where we're from in the Midwestern Star. Yeah, but I think it is, uh, what's so crazy? A McDonald's was so open about it. I felt like automatically they're showing all their cards. Yeah, like you know, it's hip

hop in the commercials. It's black people only in the commercials, Like you're you're very clearly targeting to die early because of it. But Popeye's be so like subtle because I don't even remember commercially as a kid too much. Like maybe they had I know, they had the music, Yeah I love that chicken from Popeyes. Great song, come on, that's a good song. And they had the they had that second line beat in again, like yeah, I fucking do love the chicken from Popeyes. It's so secretive, that's

why because they're just like selling New Orleans. But really they know what they're doing. They're selling that chicken. They're telling that chicken. And then yes, and I guess I'm wondering, what do you think specifically is their plan here? Like walk me through the actual like maniacal steps that are transpiring in placing the Popeyes there and presenting it to black people through song and dance. And it even sounds worse now that you say like that. Yeah, I didn't

help the situation at all. By the way, Popeye', I still would do a commercial for you any day. I'll I'll bite this ship out of a biscuit right now. Send it here, I'll bite. We've been known to h sponsored um videos, so look and if it pays, I'll do it. Yeah. We we did a sponsored ad for Old Spice. I don't use that ship, but I'll pretend. I will pretend. Immediately for that check, I was like, hell, yes, I will wear it today. And I didn't wear it that day. I just I haven't worn it in twenty years.

Great add though, check it out. It's Yeah, But no, I think it goes so far back for this because I think I brought up to the Black Panthers did all that work to provide food for the hood and it they've had so much donations and everything. They provided food for beyond the hood as well. They like went around so it became like more of a look at

how we can live. Yeah. People are always talking about like communism is bad and all that stuff, and it is sure in some cases, but the way they figured that part out, like socialism with food shouldn't even be argued. It's like, yeah, why not. What what are we doing where some people live longer and some people don't because of the food options they have. So I think it's

the government has been designed. I don't know if it's they're so open with it, but it's been designed for years to keep one set of people down, which is us. I like that you think the white listeners are at home and you're like, maybe it's me. Maybe, okay, I'll hear about if you're If you're white and poor, you get strays, But it's not to say you're you're also the target. You just don't know it and sometimes are

tricked into believing you're not the target exactly. But I think so that that always stuck out to me learning that about the Black Panthers, like and the fact that they got shut down very soon after they started reaching, not shut down, murdered and uh murdered and vilified, so they that that was shortly after they started reaching beyond just the hood and as far as providing meals, right, yeah,

I mean to your larger point. One of the things that people often point out was, like the finishing touch of like the Black Panthers was their free food program. Like they weren't angry at the idea of these guys. They pretended to be, but they weren't genuinely angry about these guys carrying weapons. They weren't actually afraid of this

organization and their threat to overthrow the government. They genuinely were afraid of the idea of some version of egalitarian resources being spread throughout you know, black and underprivileged communities, which meant that like, all right, we gotta shut this down because that fox up the algorithm that we we can't keep people in place the way we want to

if their bellies are full. Yeah, and if you give most people have stock in McDonald's, it's like no, no, noo, get these things out of here, like yeah, yeah, and okay, I like what you're saying that this isn't even just like some because sometimes I think we blame things on

the government, and it's more specific than that. And I think what you're suggesting is it's corporate America recognizing that like, oh ship, my McDonald's stock will drop if everywhere they start replicating free food programs, I won't have McDonald's breakfast to sell anymore, which means I gotta kill, uh, you know, three really powerful black men and then make the rest of them go to jail or go crazy or like

weird the weirdest congressman. Yeah exactly. But yeah, it's like it's so targeted in that respect that it's like man, and because they have these business models and structures set up for expectations. So McDonald's has the structure set up where it's like, so this means usburgers at this price, then my stock grows. All that center set up for ages. So then this that little thing can throw all that off. The little bit of like egalitarian resources can throw that

off so much. Well, we've got money. Corporate pays for politics traditionally, so you know personal office, like, well, now I control I don't control what the cops listen to me because I'm an assholes listen to me. I'm a dickad It's fine. So it's all a circle. Yeah, it's all like a weird circle of people we should not quite trust. I like where you're going here, We're so we're tracing this back to the money, which I I always believe is is the thing that's sort of like

leads to the bigger problems in the world. Right. Yes, I'm curious about your personal relationship with fast food like our Are you a fast food person? Do you still have a relationship now knowing that, now being able to point out the evil that you're recognizing, you still go like, are you like anti pop Eyes? Are you like somewhere in the middle. I'm more in the middle in theory, but I also am married, and so being married in this day and age, you're really not allowed to wait

a minute. They get you. That's how they get you because and I'm not talking about they usually I'm talking about the white man when I say that, this one, I'm talking about those evil women who come into our lives and still precious, precious goodness from us. McDonald's is my favorite restaurant in the world. I don't give a fuck what they're doing to the black community. Get that evil poison in my body helped poison my peers. I

love it so much. And my wife now has created of rules were like I'm not allowed to have it more than like twice a month, and yeah, and and I'm miserable. Yeah, but it's always for these reasons of like, you know, I want you to be alive for the baby and oh your heart beats funny, stop doing that. The doctor said, please stop. But the doctor that said you had weeks to live. H but it is so Yeah,

I don't need it basically in the last seven years. Yeah, No, I think to your point, your your relationships and the people around you ultimately are the thing that changes us, right, that helps us start to be able to track. Okay, this thing that I've I've mostly been leaning on because I didn't have any money, because it's all I knew, or because I you know, I wasn't taught that there were other options. Somebody comes into your life, being your wife,

your kids, whoever, you start to actually think about this ship. Yeah,

I mean yeah, in so many ways. Yeah, the unfortunate part, and this goes back to your original conspiracy theory is a lot of us are put in positions where, even if you're aware of it, there's not that much you can actually do about it, because these restaurants are so peppered, so heavily peppered throughout our communities that like, I, I don't want to eat McDonald's every day, but if I live without any other resources, what the funk else can

I do? Yeah, And it makes a lot of us be the you know, we're all different versions of the I got out, but it's like, you know, you gotta take more pages from people like Nipsey and be like I got out, but I could be helping out. Yeah, a lot of lot of I mean, especially when you go when you lead more conservative, I guess you're you're less likely to be like, also, let me go back

and help. But right, Yeah, it does become like this weird game of uh, I got out, and now do I have any responsibility to help get other people out? Or do I just stay the funk out and enjoy

my new life that that doesn't involve McDonald's. Vince Staples as this uh I was telling somebody about it actually recently, but like Vince Staples, did this interview that sticks with me where he talked about how him and his family were so poor when he was growing up that they used to have to just split like a sandwich off the dollar menu every day. They're like, that's all they would eat. Was like they cut like a hamburger in half, or cut a chicken mick chicken and half, whatever it was,

and they would just eat that. And he said that now as an adult, his like body doesn't work the way it's supposed to, that like he can't do certain things, and physically he has pain in places, and he attributes that to how much of his his youth was in strictly eating McDonald's. And so it's like, fuck, you know what I mean, Like maybe some of them, yeah, some of it is just like doing permanent damage to us, and there's nothing we can do about it because of

the system that's been set up. And they wonder why he's killed people, you know, allegedly allegedly, but I mean hand to murder people if he can't touch his toes because all those chickens. He literally has a song I just said, the Song of Reason. One of the lyrics is literally all my niggas killed some niggas. You know the subtexts, and the subtext is McDonald's made me do it exactly. I love that we're gonna take a break.

We'll be back with more well models and more. My mama told me, and we are that we're not gonna let Joe Biden and Kamala Harris cut America's meet. That's that on that and that's ded on that. Yeah, we're back here with more wills, more of My mama told me. We're still talking about the horror, the tragic, the awful ship that these restaurants are doing in the black and brown communities, and we're hoping that there's a way to solve it. Do you think there's a way to solve it?

Is there anything we can do? Yeah? Absolutely, Well I've been Uh, I'm a big fan of First of all, our friend Kofe who has a community community garden. Kofe Thomas, very hilarious comedian based out in New York and his has for the past few years been working on a community garden that he basically like rebuilt by hand and from an abandoned parking lot. And yeah, it's this thing and he's he's dope. It's great work. I'm totally biting his biting off of them and everything in terms of

like should I'm looking forward to. So it's you know, it's I'm gonna I'm inspired by him. It's pretty crazy to be inspired by six eight muscular nat Wait in your mind, Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure everybody over six ft is six eight. Kobe's like six and one, and you're like six seven man, especially you got that garden now. But I mean, like him, Ron Finley out here in l a Uh, he lives out for the West and

he's got a carden over there, these community gardens. And if you watch Roy Choi show on Taste Made, there's this black woman who started this program where she goes and gets the veggies and shipped from these farmers markets, and like she gets the leftovers kind of is what it is. But she brings that to the hood for free, so she'll get the left over like lettuces, but it's a shipload of lettuce and all the other like different fruits and veggies and brings that and has like her

own farmer's market about everything is free. Yeah, I mean to that, and I imagine this is what it comes out of, is restaurants throw away like literally tons and tons of produce and food and and stuff every day because they technically, you know, because of regulations, aren't allowed to keep things nearly as long as it seems reasonable

to be able to keep things. And so to that point, you know, if there's a way that we can create a space like what you're describing where that food that otherwise would be thrown into a trash can and wasted could now be helping to not only feed people but nourish them in a better way. We're moving in the

right direction. And it shouldn't just like these people always are the stories, but I feel like it should be so um out there that there's no it's not like a story, like, you know, the same way the first black everything is kind of it's awful if you really think about it, it's like we got the first black anything. It's said. So it's like he needs to be permeated everywhere so that it can no longer be like, oh,

look at check out this community garden. It should just be like, yeah, everybody, every community has a community garden where you can go for free and feed, Like if Vin Staples had had that growing I think about the type of person ind I mean, he's actually he's he's very nice, it seems, and he's he's funny as ship. But I'm just talking about like, you know, his he wouldn't have had to experience all the things he experienced. Maybe if he would, Yeah, maybe he wouldn't have murdered people.

At least all of his friends did. So, Yeah, maybe maybe there's a space where that person can still be as charming and hilarious and talented as he is while sigmultaneously not having to go through uh trauma to get there. Yeah. Exactly a lot of us too. I mean, so many of us have the similar experience. So it's like, yeah, let's what if we didn't like even just being trained to eat McDonald's the way we were, because people gotta

remember we're older than supersize me. And I feel like that's when people started to veer away from fast food or be like fast food is bad. Before that, I had never heard anyone say fast food was bad. No, I mean they literally had to get rid of the super sized side of fries because they were like, all right, they got us, they caught okay, you got us this time American consumer. But we'll be back. Maybe we'll make the large a little bigger than it was. That way,

we'll start introducing an extra small cup. It's like, I know what you're doing. There's no extra small, the largest huge. Okay, let's let's unpack some of this research, because I think it's a bit of an interesting entrance. But as I was sort of like looking into the history of fast food in this country, the thing that that made for at least a grounded entrance for this conversation actually ended

up being the Watts Rights. I don't know how much you know about the Watts Riots, but it was sparked by this dude, Marquette Fry, who was basically pulled over for drunk driving by the police, right, which was like meant to be like this minor roadside argument that broke out. It ended up turning and escalating into like a full on fight with the police. Right. But you know, I

assume he got his ass kicked. But that's not like a new story in America, right, black man getting beat up by the police, not then, not now, tail as

old as time. But what what ended up happening was a bunch of community members who were either witnesses or uh tangential to this this incident basically started spreading a rumor that the police had heard a pregnant woman that like Marquette, he basically had transformed in that game of telephone into a pregnant woman, which we launched the community into like a civil war of like six days of

complete unrest. Damn. I mean I did not know all that. Yeah, it's apparently it's all just a rumor that turned the whole thing into uh complete chaos. Chaos that basically lead lead to thirty four people getting killed, uh forty million dollars in property damage, and then the National Guard needing to be called in to uh eventually like bring calm to this whole situation. And so what that ended up.

What I learned from all of this, right is that, uh, what everybody experts sort of say about the Watts riots is that it wasn't actually the incident itself that led to it, right, it was more reflection of all the bullshit that this neighborhood had been suffering through for a long time. That like, at this point in history, two thirds of Watts residents had less than a high school education. Two thirds and one eighth of that group was totally illiterate,

and similarly, it was only the only major city. L A was the only major city without an anti poverty program, and the mayor also refused a confidential offer of federal money meant for jobs programs. So he's full on refusing to help like major groups of his own city, even though every other city in America had already adopted these new programs to help, you know, these underprivileged communities. Good

God trash palace. Yes, l A apparently has a rich history of being real mean to uh it's black residents. But so from that, and this is where we get into the fast food of it all. In nineteen sixty five, President Lyndon Johnson basically like uh, in the wake of the riots, sends these officials from the Small Business Administration of California or to California, rather from the SBA to California, saying that they need to eliminate the deep seated causes

of the riots. So he's saying like, I need you all to go in there and figure out what caused these riots on a more like grand uh, you know, community level, and I need you all to get rid of whatever that is. I need you to figure out how to solve this problem so that riots like these don't break out again. And what the SBA people do is they come up with this conference in nineteen sixty eight where they encourage black people to basically discover business

ownership through franchising and specifically through franchising in fast food. Thus, he introduces fast food chains as like a permanent staple not only black communities, but black business ownership as like your way out of poverty and loss and re you know, limited resources and ship it's just keeping it going because in there and what their mind is probably going, and in there what they would call defense, you are going to definitely make money putting fast food, and in it's like, yeah,

you're gonna be so rich and you're gonna be able to spread that well, but for what at what cost? Yeah? And and even to take that a step further, right, you're gonna be a certain type of wealthy compared to what you were, But you're not actually going to be

rich if you own a McDonald's. Right, you franchise and McDonald's, but there's people who run McDonald's who corporate for McDonald's is fucking they're making stacks every time a franchise opens, nobody takes the loss on the McDonald's side of things. It's the the individuals who are in charge of the McDonald's that might potentially lose in this scenario, so McDonald's wins. Meanwhile, these communities are basically being just stuffed. Yeah, toxic chemicals,

nutritional facts, yeah, exactly. So it goes even further because the Office of Minority Business Enterprise, established in nineteen nine, aimed specifically to establish ten thousand new minority franchises over two years. And technically this program was open to different sectors, meaning like you could have franchised some ship that wasn't food related, but in reality, black franchises were more likely to be in fast food than any other franchising sector.

So they like really pushed black people into the fast foods that like sector of things. They knew what they were doing at that point. It's like at first we're like, yeah, but look at what we'll do for your community. But now it's like and also we do want to kill you guys. Yes, we're not into being here so much. So also take this scrap food again. Yeah, it's four years later, y'all are calm now now I'm gonna kill you. Here's where it gets even more sinister. In this part

I didn't know this is. I mean, I didn't know a lot of this, but this part really like blew my fucking mind. Is that based off of research, it's basically been proven that pound for pound, in nineteen sixty five, the dietary surveys revealed that African Americans were more likely than their white counterparts of the same like wealth level, right to meet dietary recommendations for fat, fiber, fruits and vegetables.

So in nineteen sixty five, black people are in fact eating healthier than their white counterparts, and then when they compare those same uh groups in nine by nineteen ninety six, the opposite was true. That like we had completely flipped positions because of the introduction of fast food, sort of like overpopulation of fast food and black neighborhoods. Come on, man, make a joke. It's funny, man, that's hilarious. Come on, man, make the hurting stuff. Yeah, good god man. Yeah, yeah,

that's uh. It goes so far deep into it. I mean yeah, because that's that's why we need to go back to that ship, because I feel like that before that it was gardens and ship going on. I mean it had to be in l A. L A's perfect weather to grow gardens and to think about how many people have nice yards here. It's the whole reason. Everybody from not l A is always like why are you guys? You know mad? Yeah, you've got great weather and amazing

uh yard space. Every it in l A. Even the murderers speak properly like it's it's you just got time to be a peaceful person before you Gilibert, you know what I mean, Like it's it's a different energy here. But I do think to the greater point, I think it's it's two things, right. I think it's twofold. I think community gardens probably existed. I think there was some version of sort of like communal feeding and eating all happening.

But then on top of that, I think you just have much more control over what you're actually taking in when you're not eating fast food. Yeah, like you're cooking. If I'm cooking, even if I overseason my food, it's

still is probably healthier for me. Then if I go to McDonald's where they are using chemicals to fry something faster or make it puff up in a way that like humans aren't really supposed to consume, but it looks good for the eye and the picture and makes it feel like the meal that it's supposed to be, and which is especially true of chickens, by the way, which is part of my issues with the chicken restaurants. But it's like, yeah, those breasts are not that big, hey,

and I love a big titty. That's not it was titties things supposed to be that big. No, not that many too. You ever had like real chickens, Like, damn, I wish I had for me because I'm used to pope. Right, yeah, real chickens are there's barely anything there. Yeah, even like a Roscoe's. You're like, this looks like not a lot of food, but it's like, no, this is actual chicken nutt Yeah right. These wings are not radiated like some Frankenstein of a monster that you then like cut up

and put into a nugget. This is real meat and it's all It's all happened for me too, because like back in the day, the habit was to cook your own ship, and the habit was like, you know, because nobody has time, and I know, poverty ran rampant after a little bit country hit like these these downs. But it's like that that probably played into the fast food even more because now you're like, yo, in order to make enough money, I need more time. I don't have

the time. I'll cut the time that I cook. So fast food works, yes, And I think it it happened exactly like that. I think fast food became this thing that people promoted as a way of basically helping to feed your family in an effective way if you're a working class person. But then on top of that, they created this sort of image of black ownership in their

own communities. Up up until that point, black people are sort of like oppositional a and that's sort of a soft way of putting it, of white people coming into their communities and building like, you know, businesses and fanchisees that they were basically like at times even boycott the idea of like a white person coming in and creating

some ship. And so what these corporations figure out is like, no, we'll let black people own them and then we'll collect the bigger profit from it while they simultaneously killed themselves. It's it's a perfect sort of magic trick of like murder and they wonder why, like black people still skeptical of the government when it's like we've every every gift, it has the worst other side. Yes, the gift of all this black ownership has the darkest dark side ever

in terms of how it's affecting my entire community. Like this small community of people who gets these businesses, that's, uh, that's great. And then it's like it's inspirational and it helps in a lot of ways, but it's also like, but look at the overall communities gonna hurt for generations

now exactly. And I think that is important for our listeners to understand because I do sometimes think I've had a few white listeners sort of pushed back at at how much I blame the white devil for everything that's happening. And I think it's important to understand that it's not me saying that. Like when Lyndon Johnson goes and says, hey, fix, what's how opening in this community, he is in fact, like sitting back twiddling his fingers together, like and murder

them all. I don't think that that's how that worked. I think, uh, to the the earlier point that we made is he went and said, hey, can you fix that, and maybe we can give a gift of some kind to help resolve this problem. And then corporations get involved, money gets involved in those gifts, and it starts to be an effort to cook the gift into profit, and that's where murder and mayhem and sort of like the

dastardly deeds come to be. That even goes over to like police because then it used to be community policing, and then they were like, here's the gift of mark police to like help you feel comfortable. Also, they're gonna come from a completely different area where they don't even have people look like you. Their first thought is your danger, no matter what you look like exactly. And we we aren't going to do any version of vetting to see if they have any sensitivity to the community that we're

not placing them in. We'll just put them in there, and you'll feel better because we put more police. And maybe that instinct was coming from a good place, but it's so blind to the actual needs of this community that you're actually putting in a fucking poison. You're putting in something that's gonna make things worse that and that's the entire Crime Bill and Nuts Show. Yeah, you know Biden, Biden,

all that crew there, this is a good thing. Then it's like, but it's not because but you don't know that because you're an old white man. Even then, because I listen, I like police, I like sniff and hair. How can we can bind the two? How can I help black people feel more comfortable so that they can

sniff hair and the communities. That's why it's that gifts of like, here's the gifts, and it's like black people's response every time, it's okay, yeah, right, you're not excited, No, no, no, I'm taking it with a grain of song, like, yeah, here's a gif. You have the first black president. Okay, okay, it's it's gonna be far worse in eight years. So so here's where I think to that point, the gifts

sort of like loses control and becomes just sinister. Right is that by According to research, McDonald's, Burger King and Wendy's dedicated one fifth, one fifth of their radio and television advertising budget to black audiences. Wow, yeah that was noticeable. Yeah right, that's when you see him Breakdancy Chick and when I started hearing hip hop McDonald's dads. I was like, changed, right, bitch,

how karate kick for some price? And it was like, all right, man, this ain't as now what we signed up. But one we make up of the American population and you're dedicating of your advertising to us. That's there's something fucked up here. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. It goes even and further than In two thousand twelve, a Yale study found this is a Yale University, This ain't Yale Community College.

Two thousand twelve Yale University study found that the fast food industry disproportionately target Black and Latino children and it's advertising. So not only are y'all going for the grown folks, you're going for the fucking kids at a disproportionate rate because to your point, these restaurants are the only things available and subsequently the thing that they know they can profit the most from. Exactly why do you think that

door explorer campaign from Donald's was so big? They knew what they were doing, right, all right, if she's gonna be their representation, we're gonna make some uh barbecue sauce into that and see what happens. I also feel like, you know, that's uh like the first hip hop ads

with like actual rappers. I feel like they were McDonald's or some sort of fast food where you're like, oh that ship they got fucking because you're excited, like you think this guy they're actually listening to what the community wants putting uh, this rapper in the commercial. But really they're like, yeah, we've some money in that far. We don't care you think you fucking push your team made. I'm loving it, like yeah, I have to. They didn't hand him and Arby's. By the way, Push your t

is the is the his song is both the Arby's theme. Yeah, it's a song by like somebody named Bower or some ship and pushed the featuring push the Tea. So he gets and but he's he's my favorite rapper businessman because he's that's such low key money. That's my favorite. Oh no, he didn't get paid shipped off that off of what McDonald McDonald, but Arby gets paid I think because he doesn't see any residuals on McDonald's. I know that for

a fact. That's real fun. They basically offered him like a one time check, all right, but it was like two million bucks or something, which no you're thinking of Jason Weaver and The Lion King where they offered him a million dollars or some investment in the film and he picked the investment because his mom was like smart and figured out. But no, push your tea like got like sixty grand. And uh, that's why I keeps cussing

out Drake. Yeah, No, I put in work and you think I'm gonna let some light skin bitch make fun of me. No, the funk out of here, Drizzy, call

your son Feta McDonald, you bitch. That's my favorite beef because Drake keeps trying to put out records that are like pushy, you didn't really drug deal, and nobody's listening to them because they're like I've seen pushing tea that naked drug deal, right, he got straight back braids to this day that you know, I'm not buying your lives, Drake, thinking of receipts, and that's still be like, I don't think so we're seeing your white baby, Drake. This ain't that.

So the last thing that I'll say about all of this, and this I think goes to the larger point and the larger issue that I think a lot of people are currently facing and I think we'd be remiss to have this conversation without bringing it up. But food deserts. So, food deserts are a huge reason that these fast food restaurants end up being the only resource that these people have, because many people at home might be saying, well, why the funk won't you just go to the grocery store

and cook food? And the reality is is that the Department of Agriculture reported that in two thousand and ten, at twenty three point five million people in the US live in food deserts. Twenty three point five million people, meaning five million that they live more than one mile from a supermarket in urban or suburban areas, and more

than ten miles from a supermarket in rural areas. Jesus Christ, that's mean, yeah, because you're not walking to anywhere past the mile anyway, all right, how could you if you have to feed a full family, how could you carry those groceries back that far? Yeah? Yeah, And if you're ten miles away, fuck it, Yeah, you ain't saying nothing. If you're ten miles away. I don't even know what your life is like. In a city, you're always one

to two miles away. But I mean it's like, yeah, you probably drive down the country roads and I have no clue what your whole life. I don't I couldn't even imagine. And then to your earlier points sort of about like the the black panthers of it all. This Also, these food deserts also refer to food pantries, which is basically like something that's government funded to help provide food

for the population. But those pantries are based on population density, which means that the people in rural areas are even less likely to live near any kind of resource to help them because of you know, the amount of people that live in their community. Yeah, yeah, you can figure out I got the best things available. It's like, well yeah, but it's yeah, all right, we're gonna take another break. We'll be back with more will miles and more, my mama told me. And we are back. How are you

helped me too much? Yeah, we're back here. We're more will miles more of my mama told me. We're still talking about food, desserts and poverty and delicious delicious McDonald's was what was that quote that I don't know? Welcome back that voice. Sometimes I just scoured the internet for things that made me laugh. And it was a man uh talking about too much drowning and it just cracks me up. So I was like, that's gonna be a drop for me. That's gonna do it for your boy.

All right, let's get into this game. I have a brand new game that I would like to introduce today, and this game is called Langston's Mother in Law. Tania tells a story about her alien encounter. Mother. It's a great game where I'm going to play a clip from my mother in law Tanya, and I would just love to get your reactions as she tells her story of a time where she and her sister encountered what they believed to be an alien spacecraft. I love it already.

Hell yeah, here we go. This was in late two thousand three. Sharon and I were having the house is built and we were coming to look at the progress of the house of my house at this time. So we go across the other side of street to see those houses and see how that neighborhood is coming along. And coming back across the street, we're stopped at the corner and as we're sitting there and I am in a Honda Accord and I'm talking to Sharon. She's in the passenger seat. I'm talking to her, and she says

to me. Look, she says, look, I look out my driver's side window, and there is, for lack of a better description, a silver, grayish object alongside my car, right out my window. Right I can look at it. It's right there. All right, that's the first clip. What are your thoughts? How are you feeling after hearing that? Who is Sharon? What's sharing on? Trying to hear more about sharing? I ain't never seen no other Sharon. That's kind of true. I don't know. It sounds like she really actually Well,

first of all, where is this is this? Ay? This isn't like the suburbs of Baltimore. That's what I was gonna say. It has to be a place where it's not what even Baltimore is a place where they won't believe you if you say you saw aliens. So that plays a big part in this, Yes, like absolutely, That's why all the and Men and Black touches on this a little bit. That's why that you know documentary Men and Black, they covered this a bit, a little bit.

But that's why all the interviews they always saw in the inquirers like this person on the farm, this person and a place that's at that's uh, the government clearly doesn't care about nobody has any idea what they live, like nobody knew what anyone lived, like Baltimore and then where everybody's like I hated for you. I'm sorry. And to your point, as they were in sort of like the suburbs of Baltimore, and this specifically is like an area that they were like building new homes in. Like

her sharing is her sister. They both got like some of those new you know, properties built in the like this area that the whole thing was just nothing for a while, and then they built up some houses. So to your point, is a pretty open empty space that like you know, they're attempting to put land on. And so maybe an alien would stop by here because ain't nothing else going on. I think it happens. Well, first of all, let me say I'm a believer, So I

think it happens. I think happened that clear from the first your first reaction, you are like this is stupid. You were like I'm listening, y yeah, yeah, uh yeah, I think that's you know how Bill Murray supposedly we'll like just see regular people and be enact like it's what's what's up it to me? And do some ship and there. I think he always says like, no, what,

none of nobody's gonna believe that I didn't. Yeah, no one to ever believe you, right, Like I had a drink with Bill Murray literally where he told me the clubs were gonna win next year, and they went next year. But it's one of those things where I was, yeah, I was out at a party. Bill Murray stumbled into that party and and was like, I thought you you would be giving an example you dead. This actually happened,

and holy sh it. But it's one of those stories where I was first of all, I was drunk and high and I and it was other. It was like Donald Glover was there. It was a party of probably it wasn't without the possibility of Billing Right coming in. I got but it didn't. But Donald Glover at the time, it did not seem like, you know, this was before Atlanta was big, so it was like maybe it had just was still about to come up. So he was making he was a little bit popular from rap, but

only in college towns. And so I was like he uh, he was the biggest person there at the time, and then maybe like some actors, it was somebody's birthday. But then as Bill Murray walked in, all of us were looking like is that sucking Bill Murray? Everybody like push their hand in Donald's face, like is that is that Bill Murray? What's he doing here? And I don't nobody really knows if he knew the birthday by or anything.

Everybody I've talked to you afterwards he was there's like he was there right and then he I saw him pull up and Jason Burke is a huge fan. So Jason Burke went up like, let's get a drink with him, and so I was there for that. So then we grab a drink and I'm like, I cannot believe Bill murders in front of me right now. And to your point, that's what those aliens might have been doing, setting up next to their car being like bitchy, nobody gonna believe you,

and then zooming off. Ye yep, And I heard there's a lot of people who do like, uh, what else does that? Somebody else famous probably lay it sounds like some ship. Yeah, I've never heard it from Lucky but it sounds like a very lucky ye kind of just pull up and we're like, nobody's gonna leave you, So what's up? Hey? This? This is crazy that you saw me. The aliens have been doing that probably for years. I love and the people they check, it's always like, alright, truly,

nobody's gonna leave you. So except I'm not saying that about yours. I don't know that I believe it. Let's play some more of this audio. Let's let's see what else you you take from it. It is level with my car. It has no windows, and you don't hear a thing, and it's low enough. The front of it that I see is like an oval shape, and before I know it, it goes across the street. Now this time I can see fully it looks like a blom.

There are a few houses right at the corner. It goes above those homes, and I'm saying this time, I said, didn't think that's a air field back there, because behind her house it's a wooded area. And I said, I said, do you think that's a landy strip over there? And she said, follow it, yea, there's one more after this, but that that's where she leaves off, how are you feeling how much of this are you? Uh? You feeling like certain that this is an alien spacecraft? Now? Are

you more certain less certain? I feel like I'm a little less certain, but I am certain that it is if you go like the Roswalt tapes and all that stuff. You know, we've had access to aliens for a number of years because they've been living here being studied. So I do think there's those areas near military bases, and I believe there's one near Baltimore where they house aliens underground. Yeah, for research. Mainly they just can't tell us yet, I

guess because we're supposed to panic. But I did hear that was why they made et also to be like just let's see, let's gauge where it would be like if we introduced an alien too the world like a like a soft opening, like the Alien Restaurant, all these alien movie So they're like, all right, we've talked about it. Now when we tell you about the real ship, you

won't be like hyper ventilating. At the end, it was like it's not coming out of left field, and it was e t was to be like they could be friendly. We don't know, but so in that conspiracy theory, Steven Spielberg is a consenting member of whatever party is is introducing e T or is he just given a script and then they're like, uh, make this but I'll tell you why. I think it is a little bit of everything. I don't know. I don't know how much he knew when he was writing it. I don't know if it

was a situation I'm finding out nowhere. Maybe it was an open writing assignment and they hired the government and they were like, hey, we're gonna need an alien. Yeah. I honestly it could be. I didn't know that was the thing until very recently. But I'm like, oh, sometimes they have the idea and you have to fill in the blanks. But I'm like, okay, So I wonder if that was a open writing assignment, Steven Spielberg took under his belt and was like this would work, and uh so.

I don't know how consenting he was in the process, but I do think, yeah, they the government probably paid the film student to be like, of all the things that are coming in right now, making alien, this is priority number one type of yeah, yeah, I got you, I see where you so yeah, because that sounds like one of those things that came from a base and was going like they were testing it out in the streets. Yeah, in an area that was kind of vacant, so they

were like, yeah, let's see. Oh so wait, so in your mind, there's a possibility that aliens are not um are not piloting this anymore, that this is like American soldiers or people piloting a thing that they've now taken from alien visitors. I think that happens, and I think I also got that from X files where that might actually happen. Okay, another documentary. I love that. Okay, let's listen to this last clip and we'll see what where

are you land on everything. It's really very quiet, but windows are up, but that don't see any traffic or anything. So we go across the street try to catch this thing as it goes over the houses. I have to follow the street and go around the curve to where it is. We see it go over the houses and we get around. Then I'm I'm speeding around there and nothing, it's gone. I drove behind the wooded area of the reserve. I drove behind there to see if we can see anything.

Because you can see behind the houses, there's no clear area for something like that to land. First we were like, where what are you ready to go? If it's not back here ready to go because behind the wooded area it's a street, it's a more home. So I guess it's just daring on this And then what else could it possibly be? It literally just a bigger that's it. That's wild thoughts. Where what are you feeling? Now? I feel more more into the idea that it could be

the government testing alien equipment. Yeah, I'm very Also, you gave big sunning law energy with the that is that is a mother in law telling a story to her son in law. For sure, I wanted her to be able to get it all out, but I also wanted to beat the light and in patient as she's telling the story. If it was any one of my friends, all right, get to the meeting potentials, I gotta be a little more respectful. And she's a lovely woman, so I would never want to disrespect her as is my

mother in law. There's definitely you. You definitely hear more stories as the sun in law though, because it's also like being intro to the family. You're you're now the New Year. Yeah, you haven't heard any of this, right, Like all right, I tried these bits on these idiots. Still they didn't buy it. But now I got a new audience. So here we go, and I'm just eat it up. I'm like, all right in the same way

you were. Yeah, you're going talk got talking. But yeah, I think it's I think it's probably a government, uh, either testing it out, or even if the alien's driving, it's probably it's government. Watched. I love that. So so there it is, ladies and gentlemen. Uh, I believe that we've nailed it. We've resolved that that spacecraft was being piloted by American soldiers who had stolen it from an alien and are now testing that equipment to see if

it's somehow usable. And apparently it's not going that well because this was a decade ago and they still ain't released that new uh silver blimp for us to be flying around in. But maybe someday. When I didn't tell you was one of one of those soldiers was Elon Musk. So uh, young man, a young bald man by the name of Elon Musk was flying that plane and he spent all his soldier money on a new scalp, on

a new head of hair. So we've made no progress. Well, can you tell the people at home where they can find you? What cool ship do you have going on? Um at Mr Will Miles on everything, m R m R Said, I was like, I hate everything except when I'm good at it, then it's fun. But when I have a viral tweet, when people are retweeting, it's the best. And then when nobody responds to you, was like, this is toxic. Nobody should be on here. Back in my day,

kids went outside. I just ain't getting retweet some months. But yeah, and my website is now Mr Will Miles, but the mr is spelled out so in my too. Sure well Miles, yeah there you go. Alright, everything on television I've written for Yep, that's not untrue. Will has written for a lot of television. The stuff you love

and the stuff you hate. Will wrote it. And as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman and please, if you have any drops, if you have any videos, if you have any conspiracies, if you have any voice memos you would like me to hear, I would love for you to send them to my Mama pot at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you and it could end up on the podcast. Uh, this was a lovely time and bye bye everybody. Quats are racist money, many Turkey stuff. I can't tell me nothing, my lo