"Don't Drink the White One" with Sam Jay

They give out the oscars you should have been gave her. Now you want to giving them because we black. There's just no there's nothing they could do. It's like y'all just have to go away. And yes, my chips in

your racist money altern stuff, I can't tell me. Yeah. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to a fantastic, a spectacular, a devastating episode of My Mama Told Me the podcast where we did deep, deep into the pockets of black conspiracy theories and we worked to finally answer that question, What the funk happened to Forest Whittaker's eye? Please, someone tell me what happened to the man's eye. It was at a pussying accident. I have no idea how did his eye

get so terribly damaged. I once saw Forest Whittaker taking a dump in a Denny's restaurant. I was on Hollywood and Gower. I was hanging out with my friends and Forest Whittaker came in and politely asked where the restaroom was. And then one of my boys said, Hey, that's Forest Whittaker, And then we all just watched him go take a dump for twenty minutes and then come back out and drive away in a very nice part. But no answers

on the eye. But you know who might have answers on his eye and a whole lot of other answers. Is my guest today. She's fucking phenomenal, A dear friend, a hilarious comedian. You know her from Comedy Central, you know her from Netflix. She has a brand new Netflix special called three in the Morning that you motherfucker's better watch. It's one of my favorite special is one of my favorite comedians. Give it up, ladies and gentlemen for Sam Jay. What's up? This is so weird but also fun with

cheering in the background. Is that yeah? And like you introduced me, we were like really good friends yeah, that we like talk every day and then yeah, I have to do these formal introductions. There's no way to be like I talked to this nigga this morning. Give it up for sam Jay. We were texting about a puppet who has an ownly fans account. Give it up for a stay of day. Wait, what are you drinking? What is that? Y'all made me a drink with some te quilla and then she put a popsicle in it because

she's extra. Oh ship, that actually looks phenomenal, but it tastes pretty tasty. That's beautiful. Honestly, it reminds me of your conspiracy theory. It has sort of a very a crossover, if you will, of what your conspiracy theory was. And you came to me with one that, to me personally, was a devastating revelation because I had not personally heard this one. But you said, my mama told me the KKK used to make mystic juices. Yes, tell me more.

I just remember, like I was a kid, you know, growing up at Dorchester in Boston, and I remember one day I was with like two three of my friends and I went to get a mistic. I used to always get the very joint. The very joint was my jam with a blue Yeah. So I grabbed the Ferry Joy and this is like the old bottle that was shaped like you know what I mean, It was like it looked like a lava lamp. A shape was a

little funny. I feel like Mystic Juices really went for like an exotic look, like they wanted almost like a sexual energy to their bottles. And juice used to be a big deal. There was so many different juices and like the bottling was major, and I remember they had like that gold rapper and it just felt like you were you were stepping up, you know what I mean, You're definitely stepping up in the juice game. And I grabbed it in my homie Gregory was like, don't drink that.

It's made by the KKK, and I was like, he was like, yeah, KKK makes Mystic and that's why it's always in the hood. And I was like, yeah, that makes sense to me. And I put it back and I got a clearly Canadian you just let all your dreams to go. And I thought alternative, Oh man, you know what worry about you saying that it's only or like that's why it's in the hood. Is I even introducing your topic to our producers, nick I had to explain to him what mystic is. He's he had no idea.

It was like, what what is mystic? I was like, well, it's kind of like I guess it's like nigger Nantucket nectars. Yeah, yeah, that's exactly. I never thought about that, but that's a hundred percent what it is. It's like very hood specific. That grape, that red one, that grape whatever. That joint was good. I believe you're referring to Mystic grape strawberry. Yes, son, that was good. I looked up all the flavors. They have Mystic grape strawberry drink. They have Mystic tropical haze.

That was that. And you know what else everyone said was made by the KKK Crooked Eyes juice, Remember the saying eyes juice. Oh I don't know this. Oh you should look up crooked Eyes. They got little commercials too. It was some real fucked up ship. But they was say, not start up, making just a juice and it came in a can and it looked like saying that, and

it had the simple on it. But it was called crooked Eyes and like kids used to buy it, and it was like on that like candy cigarette ship, like priming kids like, look, we know we can't sell you this ship now, but when you're ready, we'll be here. Yeah. And it was called Crooked Eyes and it was just juice. We used to buy it all the time ship and and so the theory was that the kkkk to get people hooked on our liquor. Wow, And so what was your boy's theory? So just that it was in the

hood was the only reason. That's all he needed. Yeah, that's all he needed. It was enough to convince me. I was like, it is in the hood. He was like, you won't be seeing that in the white neighborhoods. I was like, I don't, you don't And Mystic wasn't. It's not in the white neighborhoods. And the even crazier part is and I was I was saying this to someone earlier that like, Mystic was almost the first juice that didn't pretend to be juice, do you know what I mean?

Like it just even in the title it says juice drink because it's just like, nah, we are offering you vitamins and minerals. This just neon. It's neon sugar enjoying. It's like it's tasty. Yeah, that does sound like fun like somebody ship when you think about it. And it's weird because I was just so twitter today and someone was like, who in the hell drinks the white mystic the you know, the colatta, And I was like, that's really I stayed away from that white one. That one

was just I don't know, it was just weird. And people who drank the colada with weirdos Like I feel like anytime like someone went in and grabbed the colatta, we was all looking like, what are you doing? There's my mom used to drink the white. Uh. It's like a whole person one like, but when you saw a kid do it, it was very jarring. I think any kid who reaches for peanut, colat of flavor anything is

like it's something. Why why are you so eager to get to retirement with the Usually a Dominican don't like all Dominican because they drink that coquito is like kids, so they just got the like flavors in the mouth for it. Right, this is this is gonna feel a little like home. So I'll turn that black kids. We ain't drinking peanut a lot of flavor and anything. I think the closest I came to drinking peanut a lot of flavor than anything was when uh seven eleven used

to make a peanut alot of slurpy. I would like mix that in with a bunch of ship. But yeah, more just to have all the flavors. It was a good base to just get get stuff cracking, like, oh, you throw a little coconut and this ship and now I'm on a beach somewhere. Yeah, now it's tropical. Yeah, I like that. Your mom who's drinking the coladas? Though?

I like it was a mystic family. I like my family. Well, you know, we used to go to I don't know where you saw mystic the most, but for us, it was in like good Chinese food restaurants, like the Chinese food restaurants with the bulletproof glass and energy. That's where we got our Chinese food from. I didn't know Chinese people ate from regular restaurants. I got much older, but you could order, like if you ordered enough shrimp fried rice,

they just throw a mystic. For sure. This ship is meaningless. It don't matter. It's cost one sense to make. Okay, so you believed you believe Gregory right away? How much do you believe in this conspiracy? Now, if I'm being honest, I would say there's still like a good fife percent of me. That's like it's possible, it's possible. It's possible they could have been doing that, you know what I mean, Like,

I don't, I don't know. Anytime I hate the KKK's doing stuff, I'm like, baby, right, yeah, I think you know, as a reasonable black person, you have no right to deny the potential of the KKK, right, you know what I mean. You can't be walking around like, no, the KKK ain't doing nothing. You gotta be like, I don't know, maybe they could be, maybe they could be on that that. Yeah, I'm not gonna take the risk of supporting the KKK.

And I think the other thing was just like they just want to make money off black people, you know what I'm saying, Like it's a way to like exploit our community and keep the poison its juice out of their community. Right, So, so this is double layered. Then this isn't just an active attempt at poisoning black people. This is also like we got to help fund our community and our KKKE stuff, our KKK stuff. All these crosses were burning are expensive, at least that's what my

mind did. I was like, so they're using the money to fund the KKK. I can't be funding the KKK. So then I can't give this my money. I can't buy Mystic juices in the moon And so did you completely cut them off from that? I did. I stopped drinking them for a while, and I would tell other people. I'd be like, don't drink that, right, Wait, what was the alternative to Mystic? Once I got cut off? I feel like after this got cut off, I was I

was drinking mad, clearly Canadian. Okay, really got sad after that, thinking a lot. I like, clearly Canadian. I think it was a good little fizzy, sugary thing that didn't make sense. I don't know. I like the very one in the peach one Okay, not for me, but I'm not here, hey, I'm not here to yuck your young a juice person, though. I was like, I was really into the juice culture.

I was like juice. I was really, I'm going to juice Con every year, bro, Like anytime the juice dropped I was like a mom, we need to get this juice to see what it is. I'm not gonna lie to you. They just mix Keywi into a new flavor, and I gotta I gotta know what that's like. I gotta know what that's about. I was big on Bocou for a while. I was like, I only drank bocous. You didn't say you're not a juice dude. Man, I'm not a juice dude. You gotta get too cool. It

used to be a comic that did the commercials. I want to say, like Richard, it was a comic. They used to do the vocal commercials and they were like a juice box, but it was a juice box for adults. So it was like this tall and it had a little like aluminum tab you with pool and I do feel like I remember this. They had like a pineapple joint that was crazy. It wasn't a straw, right, It was just sort of you pull this tab and you drink it sort of yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I don't

remember these. It was no boy who's in Curb your enthusiast Richard Lewis, Yes, he would do the commercials. The older sicker John Stewart is he just looks like John Stewart's like very old, sickly uncle. That's true. I would I would bring them sister school though, and like flex on the kids because our kids had a little kittie joints. He had a little the minute to joint a little mons choice and I'll come up with the boko like

I'm a beast, like y'all still drinking juicy juice. Yeah, nig are what capri son, bro, I've always been this. It's like this is always big. I'm trying to find a way to stunt on somebody. It's comforting to hear. I'm glad to know that this wasn't just like you getting older and flexing. You were just like, nah, I should flex from the day all day. Definitely what flex

on kids with the snacks. So you text me, uh this morning because the original conversation that we had was about mystic, but you said that you were looking it up and that you also realized that this was true about Snapple, or at least this conspiracy theory existed about Snapple. Yeah, I was thinking about it this morning, like what's it really mystic or was it another juice? Because I felt like Mystic was like a hood thing. I feel like there was another juice that it became like a thing.

And I was like, well, I really missed it. And then I was like, let me look it up before I make my friend look stupid, because that's how what I care about. You hadn't been another podcast, I wouldn't looked Ship up. I was like, I don't care, but I was like, now, let me look it up because I want my friend looking stupid. And then I was like, oh no, it Snapple. Yeah, so I also was looking it up. I do a ton of research for this podcast so that we can be correct in our wrongness,

if that makes sense. And I I discovered that Snapple shared similar rumors for Mystic, and I think part of that probably just came from the fact that like Mystic was the hood Snapple right, Like Snapple wasn't available everywhere, but we had Mystic, And so I imagine a bunch of like kids in the suburbs were probably also hearing the exact same thing about Snapple while you know, other

kids were hearing about Misstic. Yeah, like we needed our our conspiracy, so it was like they're doing it to our juice to right, we all oppressed in the game. I think I think Snapple, the Snapple of it feels more true. I don't know if that makes sense, Like it feels more plausible, but also more conspiratorial, if that makes sense. Because it was such a big company, Mystic feels like a dude cooked it in his bathtub and

then put it in a bottle. So it's like, oh, I totally believe that the KKK could have done that, But at the same time, I don't know how they would have distributed or done all the other the steps to really do the thing, to like and like target the communities and like. Because it was also advertising, Like at some point when Mystic came out, you couldn't go

to a store, at least around my way. You couldn't go to like a Bodego, like a little like Caribbean corner store without a Mystic sign or Mystic something in the window. So they definitely had strong marketing. It was definitely about putting the money behind the marketing. They they weren't just putting it in the store. They were doing everything they could so that you knew what Mystic was

and they knew to pick the kool aid colors. They knew the colors to attract us, like red, blue, purple, just a yellow that doesn't exist in the natural world. Put a little quabble in that thing. It was yellow a little. I do always love the colors, the associations that they put with the colors, where it's like, oh, this is this is neon blue, so we gotta say it's blueberry, and it's like, I don't know that you do.

Blueberries are very dark, sort of like heavy tone colors, and this is fucking glowing, bro We don't even we need to get into when I ate the fruits that I've been drinking since that whole the story, when you actually try to guava for the first time, right, and I was like, it ain't that color. This don't taste like guava at all, like guava at all. I remember when I tasted a passion fruit for the first time. I was like, this is bullshit, all so much better.

You're like, wait a minute. The difference between a banana flavoring and a banana might be one of the greatest differences that can exist in all the world and time. I hate banana flavoring, I do too, but I like bananas I think it's like one of those really, like like it's like something genetic with a banana. Like, you know, we eat certain things and like if you have this

type of the makeup, you taste this. I feel like that's what it is with banana fair Like some people taste it and it's just like Pugnan, it's just who's strong and crazy. Yeah, it's that cilantro ship. Yeah, some people are just built to genetically taste bugs and soap when they cilantro for you, banana flavoring makes you just feel it's disgusted. I don't like anything. I don't either. My again, my mom makes weird choices. She wore dschiki

and red banana drinks. She drinks a banana drinks. She ain't the banana now, laters, you can look at those people, you know, the banana people. Yeah, you look at your like that. I think so. I think it's hard when it's your family and you know, you know, I love my mom. She's a fantastic person. She's part of the inspiration behind this podcast. But she makes some weird choices,

and uh, you gotta live with those choices sometimes. That's I really always think about, Like I would have loved to just be a like a fly on the wall in the life of like young man. I would you know what it was? It was. It was a kid

who had to because my parents divorced very early. So it was a kid who had to pack all his clothes and his book bag with his homework every day because I was switching houses and ship So I was just a kid with like loose underwear in his bag and hoping other kids didn't notice, just like the same loose underwear every Wednesday, sitting in my bag, hoping no kid is going to make fun of me for like

a black neighborhood. So my mom always and then my dad was always in the suburbs, so I had I grew up with this very sort of like weird and it's part of how I know mystics so well, while simultaneously having been a very suburban kids like we were in the hood. But I spent most of my days playing around with a bunch of suburban kids, and then you know, three times a week I would be back with my mom somewhere else. So I got a you know, a weird duality going right in my head, right, that

makes sense, That's interesting. In Dorchester. Were you exclusively in the hood where you in one of those nicer parts of Dorchester. Yeah, I was just I was in the hood, but I went to Catholic school, So when I go to school, I would just play only at that time to other blacks in school at three, it was a very small group of us and so like, and I didn't go to school in my neighborhood. All the other

kids went to the local public school. So I was kind of like ostracized in my neighborhood because I wasn't in school with them all day making friends and all my friends were like at my Catholic school, but I didn't live anywhere near any of those people. So so you're not getting to hang out and really build bonds with any with anybody, yeah, you know what I mean, and getting a little bit bullied everywhere, you know what

I'm saying. It's a weird thing that like when you can't because school is such a formative part of the way you socialize and build community, and when you can't do all of the parts of school or all of the parts of building community, just become the weird kid that nobody knows that well, right, because I was bringing my Dorchester ship to the Catholic school and they're like, what's that? And then I'm coming home in my uniform and the kids are making fun of me, like look

at you gotta dress. You know what I'm saying. We get to get where whatever we want to spread all that kind of ship, and I'm like a playing to my mom and she's just like, you're gonna be better for it. And it's just like who gives a ship right now? Nah? And none of it's useful anymore anywhere we're all inside brow, None of it matters. None of the worm just stops. And it's like everything that you thought it was important is not And you never needed

to know how to read. If there's any takeaway from this episode, I hope it's that you never needed to know how to read a quote from So Maria John And here on the podcast, we're gonna take a break. We're gonna be back with more, SAMJ and more. My mama told me, hell you and we are back. Yeah, we're back here with Morris sam J. More. My mama told me she is still talking about these mystic juices, these Snapple juices and the KKK that is supposedly behind

all of it. It's terrifying. Did it scare you? I think a little bit. I would, I feel like, honestly, and this is probably heavy with Honestly, what I felt was just like you already feel so powerless in the hood that it's just so easy to believe it, you know what I mean. It's just like just another thing they're doing to keep me for living, right, There's too much ship going on to be like overwhelmed with the fear. So you're just like, all right, I'll tack this onto

my vision board. I guess of stuff that is doing to stop being happy, just another whitey move, Like, all right, I'll add it. I don't know what to do with it. Okay. So I did a bunch of research, and I'm really excited to share this research with you, in part because it brought me to a very devastating conclusion, and I want to run it past you now that that I truly believe, I wholeheartedly believe that Snapple is the work of white supremacists based on the research that I found.

I I genuinely truly believe that was rooted in white supremacy. I'm gonna walk you through everything that I found, and I'm not put off by the fact that Mystic Juices might also be a part of that whole thing. Okay, so number one, Mystic does not have a website. There's no website whatsoever. They have no web site, they have no point of contact other than a phone number and

an address. And the fact that this thing existed for decades in our community with no Wikipedia page, no way of tracking them on any sort of Internet database, feels like some sinister ship that's us. Yes, that's super sussed because it's been around for a long time. Yeah, like a very long and it's still around. Right, It's not like you couldn't find it because they're not making it anymore, right,

I don't know. That's a scary part. I don't know, like you might still be able to get So when you look up Mystic on on the internet, it's available at like Amazon and Sam's Club, But when you click on those availabilities, some of them are like, we're out of stock on this, and there's no suggestion that they're going to fill it. So it feels like Mystic is out of I gotta go to the Bronx exactly. You gotta go to like both daga is gonna bronx or something to see if it's still have been there, right,

that's the only way to really know. And my fear is that they're this is just surplus that they're like unloading in these shops. I was just thinking that too, like it just might be residual leftover mystic. Right. So also you would also have to look at the date, Yes, what date is it? And is it actually the date that was written down or is this just like scratched off some dudes like a cat in the pin rewrote it. This is like real boots to the ground research that

needs to happen. You really get in the field. We need to deploy a team. We need them to come back daily with new you know, numbers and quotes. It's also probably certain places like you go to light that's like the middle of like Mississippi, they might be popping with them exactly that I assume they're they're fucking drinking

that exclusively. They don't have water, they're just drinking mystic, just leftover mystic from the mystic factory that appeared coming out just right, y'all keep calling this brown water, that's orange mystic. Stop saying that, Okay, so Mystic does not have a website. But what I did discover is that you were correct that the the actual conspiracy theory was

associated with Snapple. In Snapple was accused of associating with not only the KKK, but also something called Operation Rescue, which is basically like this pro life group who dedicated their lives to saving poor aborted babies from evil pussies. That's, you know, a breakdown of what their their home thing was. But so Snapple gets associated with them, with the KKK,

and then lastly, Snapple gets associated with South Africa. People start saying that they're secretly brewing their tea in apartheid South Africa. Well, and this is going crazy on what was then the eight people who had the Internet, the one the one dude in a chat room. You're nailing it. So whoa. But that's also like you know that my grandmother kind of say like, if you keep getting affiliated with certain stuff, then it's something you don't you know

what I mean. That's a lot of accusations to land on one absolutely, and here's where it gets even crazier, right because I totally agree with that sentiment. If it's coming at you from all these different places. You're giving off some kind of energy. It may not be true that you're specifically associating with the KKK, but you're doing right.

And part of it was that they said, and you know these uh, Snapple was originally made by three Jewish dudes, right, So they immediately come out and go, we're three Jewish dudes from Brooklyn. What benefit will we have an associal sating with the KKK? And then everybody points to their original bottle. And when you look at the original bottle of snapple, there used to be a ship on the original bottle. And the ship people claim was a Blackbird ship or one of the ships that was used for

transferring slaves to America. I believe it. You ain't even seen it yet. What does believe have to do with ship? Exactly? Te important tea. But what else was they bringing with tea? Thank you so much for saying that's how they get you. They import some tea and they imported nigked I believe. I believe. Okay, so this is a crazier part because you just brought up the perfect transition into what ultimately

is the problem here. They're rebuttal to all of this when everybody says that the bottle, because people say that the ship on the bottle is in fact a slave ship, and they even go so far as to claim that they can see little black people in the images of the slave ship. And then Snapple says, no, no, fuck that, shut your ass up. That's not a slave ship. That ship is for the Boston Tea Party that's supposed to be said. They tried to make it tea. I knew they was gonna try to make it. They tried to

make a tea. And what's even more fucked up, the Boston Tea Party. Ain't not racist, you know what I mean? Like that, ain't That's not like the word. That's not the affiliation you want to jump to. No, it's like, I'm not that kind of racist. I'm this kind of racist. You know, white people dressed up as Native Americans throwing tea into a river and you know, right, so they're

doing making making noises. And so ultimately where this lands me, as I'm sort of digging through all of this, this nitty gritty of them sort of denying racism with more secret racism, is that it may me start to think, well, how is this not a version of white supremacy, right, Like, you're still even as you're feeding me something that supposedly is harmless, you're still telling me a truth that comes with harm that indoctrinates me in a type of white supremacy.

And so I'm starting to think what corporation, big company exists in the world that isn't associated with white supremacy. None exactly. I'm like, like, not a single one private. I started digging into how many organizations and companies are associated with like private prisons, and there are a ship ton It's weirdly the whole thing, right, It's like that's

how this whole ship is. Unfortunately, and it's way that I think it's super like black people are super aware of white people are just not like you know what I mean. But it's like it's like, bro, I mean, not for nothing. And you can name any company in America if it's around by a white personally, it is white supremacy about book, It's all coming from the same white supremacy. Microsoft, Like, it's all coming from the same yes,

you know what I mean. So it's like, you know, you can't really separate that even though I think white minds do. It's like you really can't at the end of the day, you know what I mean, Because even when I'm looking at this Snapple cover because I said, let me find an old one now that because I don't think I do think these are just people dressed up like Native Americans. But that's bad, it's not okay,

it's not something to celebrate. And it's certainly and I think people have thought these were the slaves, but I think they're just people dressed up like Native Americans. Right. But and again it just goes back to that point that you were just making that like even as white people think that they are not part of the problem, they're absolutely part of the problem. If the Bill Gates Foundation and being like what, we give a billion dollars away every year, and it's like, yeah, but bro, you

steal from so many people, you so many lives. The billion dollars doesn't and doesn't have balance. But isn't that always like the rich evil guys problem, you know, even

down to like a Jeffrey Epstein. You know, it's like I'm gonna be molester Jenkins over here, but I'm I'm gonna give I'm gonna give hell of money and donate and research, scientific support, scientific research to save the world over here, and that allows me to be molested Jenkins over here, And it's like, no, it does not, it does not allow you to do We're still tracking those molests. It's not right, and we don't like, we don't think that's good. And none of us are enjoying these molested

You keep doing, Mr Jenkins. But it's gotta be tough for white people too, because they're just being white. I think about that sometimes, like they just wake up and they're white. Then they go outside, white and the day comes to them as it does because of their whiteness, and they're like that, and that I do. I agree that that is the challenge that ultimately they they lived

this way their entire lives. If you woke me up every day and we're like you, you breathe the wrong, I'd be like, what, well, how am I supposed to do it? This is the only way I've known my entire life. And they're like, nope, you ain't never gonna breathe right. It's like, but I want to. I want to breathe correctly. And nobody will give you any space to figure that ship there's no and there's no way to do it, like you've done so much wrong, Like

you done so much wrong. I think that's the biggest challenge of where we are right now is nobody is just willing to admit that, like you might just have to take an l in like chip, Yeah, it's like you can't fix it. They The only thing they could do is it's like because it's like I always equated to like an abusive relationship, right, like like we we are the abused white in this situation, and whitey is

a very bad you know what I'm saying. And the only thing that they could do for us now is like really have a coming to God moment, you know,

like they're like a drug alcohol like Irish husband. You know, it's like they've got to come to some coming to God moment of like I've really been beating this woman and just doing her bad if she deserves better, And then they need to come in with an envelope with some money and they need to say, hey, I set you up with a house away from me, and you don't never got to see me first class get away from me. I'm sorry, that's like the only deleted your

number from my phone. Feel free to like pack three like take give us Georgia, give us like Mississippi, give us like three other states around Georgia because we need Atlanta. Give us that. Move all little crackers out of there, give us some money, and just say this is yours and we will not be coming here ever again. You don't never got to worry about me again. Make sense to me. Cool, motherfucking it all tracks for me, that's called motherfucking bars niked. Just let us have Georgia please

in Mississippi. Just give us some space at some time. I'm not saying we won't come back around, and maybe we could be friends. We will never be lovers again, but we might be able to be We need we need a second apart to really get tons and maybe you can get to know yourself as well. In all of this, I've been saying that we're not even gonna learn ourselves, so we get away from me too well.

And that's and that there's something fascinating in that for me, because I do think that so much of the framing of white culture is built around their identity in relation to other people. Like even the celebration of the Boston Tea Party is a celebration of them being derogatory towards another group, And it's like, how much of your identity

can you really dig into? That's just you, that's just just rice cakes and and fucking uh whatever whatever is that y'all are into, like figure out which I don't even think they know. Nobody even knows, you know, it's a mystery. And that's the thing. That's why, because we were like, we're like generations of being raised in this bad relationship and it's like the only thing that will

help that is like space. I'm just I'm at a point where I don't even believe that black people should go to therapy because I'm like, if you get your ass well, but you're getting beat by men, don't nobody tell you, Oh, they get some counsel and girl that will help. They tell you get the funk out the house.

You can do, you can do to counsel. And once you're going, we're not in a position to be able to decompress and like reflect on a thing yet because we're still getting pepper sprayed and fucking burned, right, and all the therapy is like when I was in therapy, I was in therapy for maybe six months, and I was and I had this white lady therapist and that was a bad and uh fist. But I'm going through the process and I'm realizing, I'm like, my problem is

white people. That's my problem. If we get down to all of the problems, like my emotional state, all of that sure is this white oppressor looming over me is the issue. So like we need to alleviate that before I could even dig into myself. It's not like I can figure this out when I'm still gonna go out and whatever things i feel I'm lacking or I can't even control how to maintenance though, because I'm dealing in

this like oppression. So it's like, well, what do we even do much of the conflation and manipulation of even like the things that are happening in the outside world right that, Like with the Black Lives Matter movement, all they keep saying is like these writers, these people are are unruly, They're not following the law. And it's like, yeah, but we did follow the law. We we actively try to follow your law. Your law does not work for us.

And now even in an attempt to politely uh disrupt or politely go against the law, you're still pointing out the fact that like we ain't following on the rules, and it's like, bro, we can't. There's no conversation to be had here then, And also you're just lying, like

just be real things. I would just really rather than just be like, we don't give a funk about you and just do what we want you to do, because that's what we all and that's it, because like you don't give a about these rules either because at whatever time and convenced, you will change them or just do whatever you want and act like they don't apply. So it's like this is none of this is real in that sense. It's like like I was talking to my uncle about the statues coming down and he said such

a point thing. He was like, first of all, none of these statutes were like erected during the war, so it's not He's like, this is not history, you know. He's like, all of these things were after the war. They would put them after the wars to intimidate black people in the South, to let them know that those types of other people were still in existence and that it couldn't act up, he said. And secondly, your name me a country that erect statutes to trees and this losers, right,

it doesn't exist. And I was like that, it was like that who Germany doesn't even let you put up like a Nazi pin, like they will arrest your site if you even kind of associate with that ship. Because they were like, no, we lost, we took our el and you take out the race stuff their trees and this losers. They tried to swim from there get they failed and they lost, So why do they mean a statue?

Why are we remembering? Mostly it was four years. Everybody pretends like this confederacy was like decades of like six had y'all had like a week and a half of fucking trying to do and delusion of and stay delusion. And that's another problem, white delusion, you know what I mean?

Because I just watched Gone with the Wind for the first time and I was like, there's nothing good about Wait a minute before you go any further, because this brings me to a section that I like to call talk that talk, and this is a mom where I'm going to enable you. I'm gonna give you thirty seconds to just rant and rave about rave it's probably the wrong word, but rant about all the evils of gone with the wind and the delusions of white people. Are

you ready? Okay? This was the issue. I didn't even have an issue with all the slavery and stuff because I knew that was in it. That was that was the times. My issue is that this white girl was an evil, manipulative little bitch and she never learned her lesson. She just stayed manipulated people and trying to get over all these men with her tired as pussy and her wild with inflation. And then at the end of it all, she just goes back to her house like this is

what I always need. After she had manipulated that man, got all his money, treated him like all types of ship because she wanted to suck the other man who was already with somebody friend at the bitch it still kept trying to the bed the bitches on her death, man, you're worried about you can suck her man. She was an unsatisfiable, just little bit and it was like, how did this person become some legendary heroin? And then that's why white women out of way they fucking are because

that's the ship she was looking up to. That is ridiculous. I just didn't get talk that talk with Sam J. Motherfucking boy. I totally agree. I think so much of their delusion is rooted in backwards messaging, backwards imagery that they have been shown for years that like, you just get to play this victim and be sad for yourself even as you are oppressing and stealing from the communities around you. Fucking wild. But we're gonna take a break and we'll be back with more sam J and more.

My mama told me, are back anyways. Oh yeah, we're back with more, sam J. We're back with more, Mama told me. We are still talking about that mysterious connection between Snapple and Mystic and the KKK and or apartheid South Africa. I think that was a part that really made me start to feel like, Okay, there's something a lot more potentially sinister here is once you start connecting like you know, literal you know, apartheid is as close

to slavery. I think it is in a literal sense that we were able to see in our lifetime and exactly at least a allowed version of it. I think they're slavery everywhere even now. But like that was like a noisy version across the country. Yeah, like there's slavery like sex slaves obviously this, and like there's probably a lot of countries that still suffer with you know, communities that are being disenfranchised and manipulated and beaten and all

that ship. But South Africa was like noisiest funk about it, and so it was like, oh damn, if these Snapple people figure out a way to take advantage of that, they're doing it. Yeah, exactly. Um, normally we play a game, we play a U usually a silly game in this in this third part of the show. But instead what I did was I wanted to track down a contact number for Mystic because we were talking about whether or

not there in the KKK. I figured it's better for us to just ask them straight up, what is your association with the Clue Klux Klan and uh why? Um? So I tracked because they don't have a website and all they have is a phone number. I tracked down that number, and I thought that we should call them together. And so I'm gonna call this number and we're gonna see what happens and imre, let's do it. Here we go, Are you reach win service? Please leave a message and

we will get back too as soon as possible. What the hell? Or you can also send us an email at Winds Service at a o L dot com. Okay, I got a lot of questions at the tone. Please record your message. When you finished recording, you may hang up or press one for more options. Hi. Hello, my

name is Langston Kerman. I'm falling because I'm a big fan of Mystic Juice drinks and I'm here with my friend Sam and we just wanted to find out if wind Service were We don't know what that is, but if you're affiliated with Mystic because if so, we have questions about whether or not the KKK is at all related to Mystic Juices, you can call us back. I don't leaven, I'm not going to leave my number, but you know where to find me. Motherfucker going to KKK.

You know what you did? Just put out an article and uh started with their legs and we'll find it. I think we did it. It was great. So I'm gonna try one more number and we'll see if this one works. And if not, then I don't know what we're gonna do. We're gonna decide that they are part

of the KKK and just live live knowing that. I honestly think anybody who doesn't pick up the phone and as part of the KKK the number dialed is not in service sounds like some KKK ship to me, It does like they because they got to move around that y'all basically made mystic on a burner phone. You snapped your phone in half and threw it into bushes. Um uh, now I want to play a game. We're gonna play a game real quick. This game is called white Lies. Ugly,

You're disgusting, I'm gonna kill you. Give me is white lies. The way that this game works is I am going to introduce to you a pretty widely accepted conspiracy theory in the white community. And what I would like for you to do is breakdown why white people care about this conspiracy theory so much? Why are they so invested in this? What is what are they really trying to

do in committing to this conspiracy theory. One of the people that's presently in the news always for some reason is Hillary Clinton, and the constant conversation around her is a suggestion that Hillary Clinton is a secret murderer. White people love to accuse her being a murderer and some sort of like weird goat fucking lady, what do you think that is? Why do you think white people are so obsessed with Hillary Clinton and her murders. I've actually

been thinking about this a lot lately. I just I think, really, I just been thinking about white people in these conspiracy theories because a lot are just coming out from them lately, which I feel like it's not a normal thing that I've seen in the world, these like hotep level ideas that they're starting to like tout around um, which is something very new to me at least, And I just

think like it's a full symptom of losing control. I just feel like they're just feeling like they're losing and they don't know how to explain it at all because they've had all the control for all the time, and so like just like in the same sense of how you have black hole types that are kind of clinging to these ideas because they can't explain their reality. It's the same ship They're just like clinging to this stuff because they can't wrap their heads on how their reality

got to where it is. Yes, so it's it's I can't make sense of why my life stinks, so I need to blame it on something impossible outside of myself. And I think to your point, if white people had to fully accept that, like, oh, your life just sucks because you ain't meant to win right way sadder than to believe that like, oh, now this lady, there's all these forces, or she's murdering and that somehow her murdering affects my personal right. That's the crazy part. Like, unless

Hillary Clinton murders you, you're fine. It doesn't really a sexual day to day it doesn't stop anything about your life. No one she's murdered has had any detrimental effect. But it's the same thing. I'm actually working on something about this, but it's the same thing with these black hoteps. Would be like everybody gay and they ain't telling you, It's like,

what does that have to do with you? Even if they are gay and they're not telling us, Yes, unless they're sucking your specific dick against your will, it kind of doesn't matter against your will. I also have to be you don't want it. Why in the world of making a difference unless they figure out a way to make your extremely heteronormative dick hard and then suck it without your permission. It pretty much has no effect on

your life at all. And and so to your in their head, the reason why I don't have nothing because I won't be gay. Even though no one's asked them, You don't know one's said, will you be gay for stuff? They're like, They're like, no, they already know I won't. They already know I won't be gay stuff. Man, it's too scared of my gay. They know the way I'll be gay would be too real, it'd be it'd be wrong gay. It's such like gay the world's never seen before,

is what I'm offering. It's like, no, this isn't It's just happens that some people are gay and some people are not. You're very upset about the way that your life turned out. I just watched one and the whole thing was just like these neis gay. But it was like that was the only conclusion. Was like they all right, I mean, I guess and they might be I think.

And the reality is we live in a society where some people do feel uncomfortable sharing their sexuality and that's okay, And so it is possible that there are secret gay quote unquote secret gays out there. But that's not the reason your life sucks, right the same way she could be murdering people, she could be an actual murder. Yes, I'm not. I'm not saying absolutely not. I'm saying I don't care. It kind of doesn't affect me. It doesn't.

I've never once known anyone she's murdered. I've never even come across someone who's cried from the murderers. She's committed. Unless we find out that like she's been driving through the hood and like murdering niggas. I know it's awesome contract killing ship, that would be so that idea. If Hillary Clinton is the shooter, then it's a different conversation, you know what I mean, Like, if she's the one everybody's calling, like I gotta call my shooting, it's Hillary's right.

But I think for now we can just assume that Hillary Clinton murdering people shouldn't affect your life, and if it does, you probably have a shitty and of life to begin with. Hell yeah, well, I think we did it. I think we we concluded that Mystic and Snapple are associated with the KKK, are certainly white supremacy, and I think overall we agree that uh we white. He needs to let us go free and just leave us alone

for a while. Ye hell yeah, we fixed everything, fixed everything. Sam, Can you tell all the people, uh where they can find you and what they should be looking out for. You can find me on Twitter or Instagram at sam J Comic s A m J A y A comic and um, I don't know. I'll just be around and ship. Just be around and ship and watch Sam's fucking special. It's called Three in the Morning. It's on Netflix. It's so goddamn good. What a hilarious comedian. We love her.

Feel free to follow me at Lengthston Kerman and also just follow h just you know, like and subscribe and do all the things with the podcast and yeah bye true because of me growing babies, I crop chips in your babies. Okoala bears are racist. The also player for owsty money versions, inventing turkey stuff. I can't tell me