Music Saved Me | Antoniette Costa: Harmonizing Through Adversity

Music Saved Me.

By focusing on music writing my form of meditation, I became calmer and I retrained my mind because I feel like there is all this noise, there's instant stories, there's constant there's constant noise in the world, and when you come back to music, writing, reading, creative process, whatever that means to you, you feel a.

Sense of purpose and stability and happiness.

I'm Lenn Hoffman, and welcome to the Music Saved Me Podcast, the podcast where we dig deep into the healing power of music with musicians who all have their own unique story to tell. Our guest today is the singer and songwriter who truly knows the healing forces of music. Antonette Costa is a singer and songwriter whose style ranges from

It's great to be here.

Lynn, thank you for that kind intro, and to Buzz as well for having me on the podcast. I love the episodes and your guests and the topics that you really address on it.

Thank you so much. Well, let's dive right in, and first let me ask you what were your first experiences that connected you so deeply to music and how did you know that it would would be your life's calling. That's kind of two questions, no great questions.

As a small child, I started writing music naturally so my dad could play guitar and sing and love doo wop, so I would harmonize with.

Him on the guitar.

It was my first introduction to it, and I started writing my own musicals early age, At around five years old. I'd use the fireplace as my stage and would start making up plots.

So very natural songwriter.

Wow, at five you're writing plays.

And it's funny because my brother's daughter, so my niece, she's doing the same thing a little bit earlier than me. She's three and a half and she came to my performance at the Kimmel Center this past week and she has it in her So maybe it's a little bit genetics.

Oh yes, there's a lot of that. Definitely. Can you share I kind of pinted about it a little bit upfront, but would you to share the recent challenges you've had health wise and why you decided to be so open and extremely transparent about it with your music? That's not easy, of course.

I had a brain tumor and was sick for about three years, and during that process I was on medication for over a year and eventually needed surgery. During that time, music was my therapy. It was my hope. And my mom gave me the idea when I was at my worst point before surgery. She knows I love the process of writing, so to get my head in a better spot, she said, why don't you if you can sing after

Wow. So visualization you mentioned that word. That's a powerful word, almost as powerful as music and the vibration. A lot of people don't realize that, but when you visualize things, you make them happen.

It's so true. Even with performances.

I was a bit afraid to perform this past week at Kimmel Center because the last time I performed was in twenty nineteen, and my voice has changed a little bit since I had the surgery and it's not as strong.

I haven't been exercising it.

So before I got on that stage, I thought about every possible thing that could go wrong with the sound system and how I would be calm, and that I performed for so many years that I would handle it as it would come up, and having fun with my musicians, and how blessed I was to be performing with musicians who played on the album.

So visualizing helped me stay in that zone.

That's amazing, And it really does go down exactly how you saw that, doesn't it.

It's true, and we did have when you're.

In the middle of it, right and you're looking around. You're like, I saw this, I saw all of this.

It's funny you said that because there was a little bit of a sound mess up in the beginning, and I didn't freak out because I'd already visualized it and knew how so hilarious.

That I read that. Tracy Chapman was a big influence on you early on. Who are some of the other musicians or maybe particular songs that you listened to while you were going through these challenging times in your life.

Fastcar is one of my favorite songs ever before the recent resurgence of it, which I was happy that Tracy was given the spotlight. And I think why it's so powerful is you feel her story through her voice and the lyrics, and that you know when she sings it. That song came from the songwriter.

I love her. I grew up listening to a lot of Dion de Mucci.

He's done some do wop, but I like his live performances, and again, he's a songwriter. I tend to gravitate towards songwriters in terms of voices. I've always loved Annita Baker just this soul, rich, smooth, like an instrument. But I've grasp pitated to just a lot of songs, and usually ones that are sung by the songwriter.

Well, I read that you said, writing a song I love this is like bottling an emotion in its most potent form. It's almost like you're bottling medicine, not only for yourself but for others. Can you describe how it feels when you've moved someone with your music and you've witnessed this.

It's the most powerful feeling.

And I experienced that when I decided to open up about what I had gone through with my health journey. I usually don't like to say what I've written a song about or the inspiration behind it, but pitt a patter I started writing it in the MRI machine, about

It's pretty incredible that you were able to focus on that while going through that. Do you believe that music has this supernatural healing power that we can't quite figure out what exactly it is, which is what we try to do on the show every time, and there's so many different you.

Know, absolutely, I think of music as the bridge to the spiritual world or ethereal world, and that songwriting and music is the most palpable form of storytelling. So for me, it definitely saved me because I was at a point in my life that I felt very hopeless, and once I dived into the songwriting process and started collaborating with musicians, it just lifted my spirit and I knew I'd get

That was one person who listened.

It was about finishing and completing the process so powerful.

Can you highlight a few of the songs that might help if there was anyone in the audience listening right now going through something similar to you. That let's start with Crumbles. Oh so good Soldiers, Cry you.

Crumbles was very much you keep it on the right.

Song because I felt I felt that when I wrote that song that you can never put all of your hope in one person, and that you need to anchor in something deeper. And for me, even taking music that created a hope and gave me a sense of purpose, and that comes from within. You can't ever have a sense of happiness or worth outside of yourself or looking to other people. It needs to come from within, and music helped me come back to that.

Well, if there was anyone going through a similar challenge right now, musically or otherwise, what advice could you give someone going through that.

To surround yourself with positive forces and people. My world got very small, and I would be lying to say I didn't feel a sense.

Of fomo for a bit.

But then as I trained my mind by focusing on music writing my form of meditation, I became calmer and I retrained my mind because I feel like there was all this noise, there's instant stories, there's constant there's constant noise in the world.

And when you come back.

To music, writing, reading, creative process, whatever, that means to you you feel a sense.

Of purpose and stability and happiness.

Tell me about collaborating with other artists. I know you've collaborated with quite a few that we know and maybe we haven't heard of before. But is there a magic there that helps?

There is definitely a magic and on this album pit a pattern. More so than about me, it was about the team effort.

So there are incredible musicians that dropped so much to be a part of it during the holidays. It was in December that we recorded this ray Angry of the Roots, James Poyser of the Roots, Spanky McCurdy, Karie Matteen, Steve McKee, TK Wonder Dice Raw.

I'm mentioning these names.

Because everyone put the heart and soul into the album, and it's not just about the vocalist.

It's about the team.

And that also motivated me to release it and finish it because I wanted everyone's work to be heard.

And the musicians on call you also worked with them as well.

I'm trying to right.

Now, Lynn, It's hilarious the timing of this because Sam Hollander, who you interviewed, Yes, I'm an incredible songwriter, producer, he's done it all in the industry. I heard that he was going to be on the board and I wanted to be involved after my health journey and realizing how therapeutic music is, and I reached out to him and were in talks and how I could be involved, and.

He's on this podcast.

So it's just this timing of everything falling into place when you surrender to the music and that energy.

Yeah, when you just kind of let yourself be guided. It's amazing the places that you can go.

And here you are.

And I remember watching the VH one and seeing you.

It's it's crazy to me because I would never think one day i'd be I'd be in front.

Of you, Oh my looking interviewed by you.

Funny you should say that I was reading you were you worked at MTV.

I did, I did, I would blog, I would blog.

That was my first internship through the whole to fifteen fifteen Broadway. But I wish that I could speak like you, because you have this calm, assertive voice. And I remember, actually I had heard your voice before I saw your your image, and I had been I like YouTube, looking up old clips and it's just very surreal to be interviewed by you.

Well, I'll tell you it's just equally as surreal for you to say that to me, because I don't place a lot of stock in myself in that aspect. It's always like you're talking to somebody else next to me, because when I guess maybe people are people, and I guess, it gets me a little. As you can see, I don't even know what to say.

We'll be on again because it's like Benjamin Button in front of me, because you look younger then back then, and your presence on screen and of course your voice. I'm just very excited to be on here and that you're still you're still doing what you love and you're so great at well.

Thanks and Tonet Well just a beautiful woman, a beautiful heart full of music, and I can't thank you enough for coming on the show today and sharing some of your story. Hopefully it's helped lift some up. Like you say, just one is enough, Yes, one is enough, One's enough. Antonette Costa, thank you for sharing your remarkable journey with us and your story on music saved me. And keep fighting a good fight and please keep in touch and thanks for coming on the show.

Welyn thank you so much for having me as an honor,