Movie Mastery - podcast cover

Movie Mastery

Jef Aldrich and Jon Taylorsystemmasterypodcast.com
Jef and Jon review movies by randomly rolling on an audience-submitted list.

Episodes

Movie Mastery - Morbius (2022)

As requested, we are doing the follow up to the Madame Web watch with a look back at the first sign that maybe Sony just doesn't know what the hell it's doing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 17, 20241 hr 26 min

Movie Mastery - In Theaters Now: Madame Web

Can this movie truly be as bad as they say? Do we have another Morbius? Can we convince them to release this again in a couple months? One of these questions answered and more in the triumphant return of In Theaters Now. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 24, 20241 hr 27 min

Movie Mastery - Money Plane (2020)

A trip to the seedy sky of the crime world where the most hardened criminals can gamble on the most degenerate games like *checks notes* Texas Hold-em. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 02, 20241 hr 16 min

Movie Mastery - Bulletproof Monk (2003)

Chow Yun-fat teaches Seann William Scott that wuxia style martial arts is all about believing in yourself or whatever but it's fine since the movie is really about punching Nazis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 19, 20241 hr 14 min

Movie Mastery - Life-Size 2 (2018)

In a hard turn from the original movie that was about the acceptance of loss and moving on from grief, this movie is about how dynastic corporate wealth is a good thing, actually. And it's a Christmas movie! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 05, 20241 hr 28 min

Movie Mastery - Christmas Icetastrophe (2014)

A SyFy Original TV movie where an asteroid freezes everything around it and also it's Christmas time. I don't know, I let Jef pick this one. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dec 21, 20231 hr 27 min

Movie Mastery - Black Dog (1998)

A movie about a man willing to commit several major felonies and some light murder just so his family doesn't have to move from their home to an apartment. Dude loves him some suburbs. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dec 08, 20231 hr 12 min

Movie Mastery - Swamp Thing (1982)

You'll come to see Ray Wise be a manic sex pest and then stay because you already turned it on and it would be effort to put on something else. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nov 24, 20231 hr 17 min

Movie Mastery - The Covenant (2006)

A movie about how rich, old money white men can do whatever they want and if anyone tries to stop them, they're the bad guy. Also magic or something. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nov 10, 20231 hr 15 min

Movie Mastery - Blood and Donuts (1995)

I guess the idea that being a vampire might not be great was novel in Canada in the 90's because this movie really focuses exclusively on that like it was going to blow your mind. It then does absolutely nothing else with its runtime. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oct 27, 20231 hr 10 min

Movie Mastery - Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021)

Nic Cage in a movie that seemed to be tailor made to have Nic Cage in it while simultaneously unsure of what to do with him. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sep 29, 20231 hr 17 min

Movie Mastery - Star Leaf (2015)

A stoner horror movie that doesn't attempt to even remotely be scary but also doesn't lean into the stoner comedy aspect either. Just a big pile of nothing that wastes everybody's time. Just like us! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sep 14, 20231 hr 13 min

Movie Mastery - Sinister Squad (2016)

A cash grab mockbuster of Suicide Squad about fairy tale villains fighting against the forces of Death. A sentence that makes this absolute boring turd sound way more interesting than it is. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 31, 20231 hr 13 min

Movie Mastery - War-Gods of the Deep

The UK tries to get in on the Corman trend of using Vincent Price in Edgar Allan Poe movies but messes it up so badly that it is almost impressive. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 18, 20231 hr 17 min

Movie Mastery - Warriors of Virtue (1997)

Trying to cash in on the Ninja Turtles and Power Rangers but having none of the charm and fun that made those work. With special guest James D'Amato! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jul 21, 20231 hr 28 min

Movie Mastery - Cats Don't Dance (1997)

We just keep randomly getting animated movies for some reason. Blessedly, this one is not a low budget European turd but a fairly decent high budget one that got no promotion and nobody heard of. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jun 22, 20231 hr 25 min

Movie Mastery - Millionaire Dogs (1999)

A German animated film about the dangers of wealth and the corruption of morality. Just kidding. Some dogs get a mansion and then do a Home Alone on some truly grotesque bad guys. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jun 08, 20231 hr 28 min

Movie Mastery - Sir Billi (2012)

The final film from beloved actor Sean Connery and the first feature length animated film from Scotland. It is also so bafflingly terrible that Jon kind of lost his mind while trying to review it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

May 12, 20231 hr 37 min

Movie Mastery - Krull (1983)

The cult classic fantasy/action/sci-fi film that that had some awesome ideas and also some poor execution. At least we get a young Liam Neeson that just looks happy to be there. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Apr 27, 20231 hr 22 min

Movie Mastery - Robin-B-Hood (2006)

We take a look at a Jackie Chan movie that revolves around two professional thieves that become unlikely parents when they steal a baby. Hijinks but definitely not enjoyment ensues. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Apr 13, 20231 hr 17 min

Movie Mastery - The Ice Pirates (1984)

A swashbuckling, fantasy, space opera, comedy that fails to effectively be any of those things. But hey, it's got a young Ron Perlman and Anjelica Huston. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 31, 20231 hr 18 min

Movie Mastery - Godzilla: Final Wars (2004)

Godzilla runs a victory lap around all of his various kaiju nemeses in this 50th anniversary film. Plus some added in aliens, mutants, and Mayor Hagar from Final Fight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 17, 20231 hr 22 min

Movie Mastery - Batman: Assault on Arkham (2014)

A Batman movie with almost no Batman. This is an animated Suicide Squad film where they got to imply some nudity and they took full advantage of it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 03, 20231 hr 28 min

Movie Mastery - The Toy (1982)

I thought when we rolled into getting to watch a Richard Pryor film that it would be a nice treat. It was, sadly, not. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 17, 20231 hr 16 min

Bridge of Dragons (1999)

Dolph Lundgren in a movie that tries to blend medieval fantasy with modern warfare and ends up being mostly back and forth shots of people pretending to shoot guns and then falling down but some of them wear jerkins, I guess. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 03, 20231 hr 13 min

Curse 2: The Bite (1989)

The old random number generator has really been punishing us the past few episodes and the hits just keep on comin. At least it isn't Baby Ghost. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 21, 20231 hr 23 min

Chuck Steel: Night of the Trampires (2018)

We look at a claymation satire of the 80's cop films that manages to be mostly preachy about how therapy turns you into less of a man. You can imagine we have opinions on this. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 05, 20231 hr 11 min

Baby Ghost (1995)

Martin Sheen has a little brother and he apparently was cursed by a witch to never be able to turn down a movie. And boy does this technically, barely count as a movie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dec 23, 20221 hr 17 min

Saved! (2004)

A movie that makes fun of the hypocrisy of the Christian faith's message and the actions their followers take. Definitely not going to get in trouble for anything we say during this one. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dec 09, 20221 hr 28 min
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