Harnessing the Power of Alignment in Fundraising with Mallory Erickson

Alignment fundraising is about being able to stand in and hold alignment as the priority , even when you feel that pressure around your numbers , even when you are sitting in that donor meeting and you feel so close to getting a yes to this grant that you've been working towards and you realize in the back of your head maybe it's not the right fit , but you're

like , oh , I'm almost there . And so you go right into that tunnel vision . It's to how do you hold alignment when there's a funder who doesn't understand the value and importance of operating costs inside your organization ? So a lot of us say we're looking for alignment , we use alignment as a strategy , but our intention is still not oriented around alignment .

Ready to learn the latest trends , actionable tips and the real stories from behind the feed , let's transform your mission into a movement . Hello everyone , it's always a good day when I get to have one of my best friends and an extremely amazing wealth of knowledge mentor , supporter , coach , consultant , badass entrepreneur .

On the other end , Mallory Erickson , I am so pumped that you are here because your book came out yesterday .

It was an episode talking about , of course , my jam monthly , giving but a little bit of a taste of Mallory's extreme wisdom when it comes to all things fundraising . And this book has been , I know , a long time coming . When did you start the research and putting it together ?

I feel like there's so many things like . We hear a lot of like , rinse and repeat strategies around , or we feel like , oh , we've like made the template for that , or we know the strategy for that , and like , but people still aren't implementing it or using things . We aren't solving the problems because giving continues to decline .

And so I sort of went on this wild goose chase around figuring out like , okay , for some reason we aren't solving this problem for fundraisers . Why ? Why isn't it working ? What are different ways to approach it ? And so then , maybe I don't know , a year and a half into that , a publisher reached out .

I kicked the can and said no for 18 months and then finally was like , okay , I'll do it . And then started to try to figure out okay , what does it look like to put this into a written format in a cohesive way , which was , as you know , incredibly challenging , but here we are and it is alive .

I want them to like close it , feeling really seen , really understood , and feeling like they have sort of their next step on how they can fundraise in an alignment first way that allows them to feel better and do better and ultimately raise more .

So that's like for the fundraiser , like I want them to feel it like in their heart but also have a sense of clarity around what that next step is for them .

And then for folks who are reading this book , who support fundraisers whether that's like the CEO of an organization or a funder , or a tech provider or a consultant I want them to close the book , really understanding fundraisers in a much deeper way and thinking about what is the first step that they can take to ensure that their support practices really meet

fundraisers where they're actually at . I think a lot of times we think we like , know better than fundraisers .

You know , we're like , oh , they just need this thing , and I think my hope is that this really gives folks a deeper inside look at what the fundraiser experiences and I use the term fundraiser , even though a lot of people don't identify as fundraisers , but they are doing the fundraising right .

So so I mean all of those people , not just people who are like in sort of official fundraiser positions .

Even if you are marketing the organization , you feel the pressure of working with the fundraising team or these days it hopefully isn't as siloed and you're all one team working together to grow the impact of your organization as one . To grow the impact of your organization as one . So , from the statement alignment first . What does that mean ?

How can somebody be in an alignment first position in their work ?

I mean , to me , marketing in nonprofits is part of good fundraising because it's about building connection , building conversations , creating engagement .

It's all the same thing , like we spend so much time siloing these elements when the reality is they are deeply connected , if not the same thing , and it'd be great if we just had like another word that was like the all the things .

I think you know when I talk about alignment first , and so inside the book I talk about something called alignment fundraising , which is really this idea of prioritizing alignment over money . Now , it does not mean that alignment does not bring in more money . It does , but it's about alignment first , not money first .

So there's a lot of these like baked in beliefs inside our sector from , like the scarcity mindset that comes from the history of the sector that has then led to all these transactional ways that we are taught to fundraise . All of those are rooted in this sort of like tunnel vision around money first , and even when we say this is to build relationships .

At the end of the day , our intention is money in a way that really distorts how we focus on building that relationship . And so what alignment first is about is like how do you focus on whether or not you are in alignment with somebody ? Are you trying to create the same change in the community ? Are you trying to both address this issue over here ?

Do you both see value in X , y and Z right , focusing on whether or not ? Are we really aligned ? And if we are , then one of the ways that we can create these shared goals and the shared vision is to bring our different assets together . Your asset ,

one of your assets , might be having money . One of my assets is knowing how to solve this problem . What does it look like when we bring those assets together and work towards achieving this goal together ? The other thing I'll say before we move on is that alignment is talked about by a lot of coaches and consultants .

I did not create this idea of alignment , but alignment fundraising is about being able to stand in and hold alignment as the priority , even when you feel that pressure around your numbers , even when you are sitting in that donor meeting and you feel so close to getting a yes to this grant that you've been working towards and you realize in the back of your head

maybe it's not the right fit , but you're like , oh , I'm almost there . And so you go right into that tunnel vision . It's to how do you hold alignment when there's a funder who doesn't understand the value and importance of operating costs inside your organization ?

So a lot of us say we're looking for alignment , we use alignment as a strategy , but our intention is still not oriented around alignment .

And one of the things that allows folks inside my program , power Partners and what facilitates alignment fundraising that I talk about in the book is how you develop and create inner alignment in yourself , because when you have that and you know how to hold that and feel that , then you actually know how to create and hold a line around alignment in your

partnerships .

And then if you say no and you stand in your ground a lot of times , then other doors open up that maybe wouldn't have happened if you didn't say no .

I always see like those things in my own personal life when I do say no to something that was like super hard to say no to and then it's like wow , like I had no idea this thing was going to happen over here .

Yeah , I love putting things into practice and so for listeners , if they are in a leadership capacity or if they are the founder in their small shop , how do they have the internal talk and dialogue with themselves to put these things into practice , to reduce that pressure ?

It's hard to give like definitely go get the book because it'll walk you through some of this like step-by-step , and so I'm going to give these tips and tools , but I don't want to sort of like oversimplify them , right ? Like , starting to build a relationship with yourself takes time , and it takes practice and it takes multiple tools .

The first step , though , is acknowledging where maybe you haven't been living in alignment and like what hasn't been feeling good , and having some of that recognition , maybe , of the things that you want to be different and the things that you want to change .

Like , awareness of our feelings is oftentimes like the gateway to actually being able to solve all of these problems , and that requires us to be honest about how we're feeling and where we're at . And so the first piece .

It seems so simple , but , like awareness and awareness might be , at the end of the day , like people always think like oh , but , mallory , I'm moving so fast between things I don't have a moment to like reflect on something , like I'm back to back to back , right . So start with a reflection at the end of your day .

Take two minutes to reflect on what were two things today where I felt like I was really in alignment , they felt really good and I want more of those things . And then what were two things today where it really felt like a lot of friction and I was like , okay , something's out of alignment here .

Maybe you don't know what it was , maybe you don't know why , but you're just like , oh , something about that like did not feel like it was super aligned to me and I want less of those types of experiences , right , like , maybe the reflections start there and then the awareness starts to get sort of closer and closer and closer to the moment of the stimuli .

The more you build awareness like even if it's after the fact it starts to creep into your like lived experience awareness and it gets more and more close to the stimuli . So that's the very first piece , and then I think it's recognizing that well , actually , before I go there . The second step is self-compassion .

And like their self-talk on the camera and you they did like the mouth reading of what they were saying and I just thought it was so beautiful and I think it's so true , like you are the energy that you are going to project right and how you feel .

So much self-coaching and that the relationship between mind and body . And so I posted for those of you who didn't see it , which is probably almost everybody listening to this , like after the Olympics , I was like , okay , it's like one thing to see that with like an Olympic champion , right , and then to be like , okay , but like that's like for the Olympics .

But I had an experience , like a few days later , where my five-year-old has been trying to do a handstand , was really struggling , was crying on the kitchen floor that she's been working so hard around it and can't do it , and I sat her down and I was like , okay , babe , there's actually like two parts to the handstand .

Like one is the strength to be able to hold your body , but the other is the fear . Right , the moment you start to move yourself into that position , you get scared , understandably .

Being upside down is scary , and so your body is actually kind of like freaking out and pulling you out of it , and so maybe what we need to focus on is how you're talking to yourself about that handstand , cause I see that you have the strength , but I'm not sure what's happening in your head right when you go into that .

And then she asked me you know , mom , can you do a handstand ? And I used to do a lot of yoga . I was yoga teacher certified . And you know , mom , can you do a handstand ? And I used to do a lot of yoga ? I was yoga teacher certified .

And I was like , oh , I don't think so , cause , like , even when I was practicing yoga seven days a week , I was the strongest I ever was . I like could not do a handstand to save my life , but I always practice what I preach . So I was like I'll try , like I'll try and turns out I can do a handstand .

And I went up pretty quick and then I like held it for 10 seconds after like three tries and I was like , okay , this is another example of how powerful our mind is right . Like yeah , I'm not practicing .

I'm hardly practicing yoga , but I have a lot of nervous system regulation techniques that have me not freaking out when I go upside down , because my body knows how to like calibrate .

I feel like we like segment , like , oh , like wellness and all the like brain and self-talk stuff over here , and then my marketing and fundraising strategy over here and like maybe I'll get to that stuff later and it's like your ability to do the strategy depends on these pieces . So , yes , positive self-talk 100% .

I did not go to school for fundraising . I did not go to like , I was not trained , and I'm sure 95% of you listeners were not trained in the thing that you're probably doing right now and I will say probably , I don't know 100% of what I do now is because I just believed . I remember when I quit my job in 2017 , I told myself I will not fail .

I will not fail and then , worst case scenario , I'll move back on my parents' couch as a 30 year old and I'll go back and I'll get a full-time job and I'll figure it out , but the mental like of just like this is possible . I can do it , I'm going to have that conversation .

It's so interesting hearing you talk about this because I know so many amazing leaders , founders , that created their organization or working at an organization purely from passion , not experience , and the burnout and the pressure that

can come from just that self-talk is so interesting . So you brought up your daughter and we both have little girls , girl moms , and I know we want them to live in a world where fundraising and charity is just like , booming right and blossoming and so positive and powerful in the world .

For the next generation of fundraisers , how do you foresee the job shifting ? I've worked in sales and I've worked in fundraising and it was kind of like a lot of you just figure it out . What do you like people reading the book ? If you could foresee a decade from now , what does the landscape look like ?

So like knowing that there is so much unknown in front of us and that actually goes against sort of our biological desire for around fear , right . So there are a few things that make fear increase . One is the unknown and feeling , sort of like we don't have control over things .

So like one thing that decreases fear is like increasing knowledge around something or increasing certain senses of control , but also recognizing that and sort of surrendering to the fact that , like we don't have control over a lot of things .

So I think having the tools and skills to manage uncertainty in your brain , in your body , to be able to tell yourself like you're still safe , you know , like that lion is not going to eat you there is no lion , in fact but recognizing sort of the fear and discomfort that comes up from uncertainty , I think managing discomfort in general is like one of the

skills that we need , sort of in addition to uncertainty , like uncertainty can lead to discomfort , but so can a lot of other things that we need to be doing more of putting ourselves out there , trying new things , taking risks . And I think sometimes we experience discomfort .

I talk about this in the book a lot , actually that there are like these kind of three different types of discomfort . And one is discomfort because something is wrong .

Right , like okay , yes , sometimes discomfort comes because you're in a really toxic environment or you're experiencing microaggression or you're experiencing real sexism , racism , all those things like those are real things .

And sometimes we experience discomfort because we're in unfamiliar territory and we're in the unknown and that creates discomfort and we wanna be able to manage and lean into that discomfort and not just try to escape it because we're feeling that discomfort so we're like , oh , this is wrong , that I'm here .

We also experience discomfort when we are trying to live into more alignment and we're trying to prioritize long-term alignment over short-term escape , right .

So sometimes , standing in alignment , saying no to that funder because you see how it's actually gonna wring your staff dry and be so painful to implement and that is gonna be such expensive money to accept , it is going to be uncomfortable to hold that for that long-term alignment over the immediate anxiety that you feel around hitting your budget numbers .

So I think like managing uncertainty and discomfort are going to be like the two of the most important skills for us to have , you know , now and into the future . And then also a healthy relationship with ourselves .

I think , like , as the world becomes more overwhelming and intense and disorienting and our notifications just become like 45 times faster and all the things , laura , please no , but like you know , like .

I feel that way too , and so I think like one of the skills is to like be able to come home to yourself and to feel safe inside your body and to like be able to sit . I came home from preschool drop-off . My five-year-old started preschool .

I came home , I was so emotional and I could feel myself so dysregulated and I was like watching the clock and I was like okay , like I know , I know I have a meeting soon or whatever , but I could feel my body kind of like vibrating and tingling . So I like had the awareness like I'm really dysregulated right now .

Right , I could like feel the emotion like in my throat you know when you get those like bubbles kind of in your throat and I was just like lay down on the ground , mallory , and I just like laid down in the middle of my family room and like let the tears kind of like stream out of my eyes and I just regulated on the ground , the ground and I put my

hands on my chest and like reminded myself that like I am my home , I am safe , this is scary and unknown , that's okay . And five minutes later got up and was like back in my body and could go to that call and feel really grounded .

So I think , like those three things managing uncertainty , managing discomfort and having a healthy relationship with yourself those I think are the priorities for the future .

You do a lot of speaking , and so you are in person talking with fundraisers , nonprofit professionals , all the time and you are sharing some of these practices . What are the responses ? I'm sure , listener , if you are running , if you're doing laundry , if you're washing your dishes , you may be having like a but moment . How do you , what do you hear ?

And then how do you work with people through those but Mallory statements ?

So one of the things I want to encourage people to recognize is like the need for nuance and to say both and right . So I talk about in the book , like yes , material scarcity is a real thing . Many people who are listening to this might be experiencing it in their own lives , in their organization . Material scarcity exists , particularly in our sector .

Scarcity exists particularly in our sector and scarcity mindset is an additional limitation that we place on material scarcity . That further reduces our ability to solve material scarcity issues because it restricts our thinking , our clarity , our creativity and our ability to actually solve that root issue .

So we need the capacity to hold both truths and to be able to say yes . Like I say in the book , like all the coaching in the world cannot solve a completely toxic work environment and having these tools and skills gives you the capacity and clarity to deal with that environment in totally different ways .

So I think the first piece is like get curious , try to like , notice if you're right , going right into the yeah but right , that's a fear response . Anything binary , that's fear , right . And so it's like get curious . How might one of these things be true for you ? How could you get just one degree or 1% more focused on alignment than money ?

What would it look like for you to scan that email that's going out and just scan it for some of the principles in the book around what create connection ? You know you don't have to . What is it like ? Is it one bite of the elephant at a time ? I'm not sure why we're eating an elephant , but like .

The idea is not that you end this and you're like or you buy the book and you're like oh my gosh , I need to do 180 degree change or nothing , because you're never going to do that .

So like we need to like recognize that , like transformation does mean leaving some things behind , that change can happen slowly and that we can do .

You know , maybe you're not becoming the butterfly , maybe you're just growing in one way , a little bit more , but recognizing and doing it at a pace that allows you to sort of be prepared to also leave parts of the old behind , if what you're trying to do is transform into a new version of yourself and transform your organization .

got our house and I wrote in present tense . I'm in a neighborhood community we love . I am currently sitting on our patio in a swinging chair . I am , I think I wrote about our bathroom has a tub that like sits in the middle of the room and I like we just got back from sipping wine with our neighbors , we're planning our family and all these things .

Lo and behold , the house we walked into and bought and you have been here has a patio on the back . My dad bought me a swinging chair . There is a tub , like some of these things you cannot make up , and then I didn't notice it because life is happening and you're busy . Until I go back to your first statement .

On reflection , read that journal statement and was like holy , like unreal .

Like our brains predict and simulate our reality based on what we have exposed it to , allowed it to dream about . Like we can only raise the amount of money we believe is out there to be raised so like until we start to visualize who we want to be , what we want , what that looks and feels like , and we give ourselves permission to do that .

That forms the basis of our brain's ability to find those homes right . It's amazing .

Now , everyone , please go to malloryericksoncom backslash book , hot off the presses right now . Get it in all your book clubs . Send it to your friends . It's the holidays . Send it to a coworker , they will love you . Put a sweet little note at the beginning .

I always like it when people put little post-it notes on little areas in the book that you think are meaningful for them . So just a couple of tips . Mallory , thank you . Where else can people obviously listen to the fundraising podcast ? Anywhere else that you want people to go to connect with you ?