Tales from the Darkside S01E22&23 (Grandma's Last Wish - The False Prophet)

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Weird Weave.

Welcome back to Midnight Viewing the horror anthology podcast. I'm Father Alone and joining me. Here are the culture cast Christachue.

I don't know about y'all, but I am a fan of a huge all beef American hot dog.

You're gonna get one and joining us. Also is the projection boost Mike White Horas is that you Horace Egg? Tonight,

You guys know how much I love vague powers, vague wishes, vague things. I love this episode because it's just so fucking vague. Yeah, I have guesses as to what happened, but yeah, this it's so reminded me of word Processor of the Gods, where it is just some of the worst people that have ever walked the planet. And then Grandma though I would have to say Grandma's not a

How about you, Chris, I'm a fan of old person makeup in this episode. Boy, they really put the Practical Effect team to the task, didn't they? By asking how can you make three adult humans look like disgusting candle people? We figured it out.

Success.

Yeah, success was meant it was success was had question mark. You mentioned, Mike that all these people are terrible. The Grandma is the worst one.

She's pretty awful.

She's written the way that no real human being is, which is completely inept, even to just get up and move around the house, but in a way that again, it's just unrealistic stick and so to pair that with some really terrible human beings, it's a man. The quicker we can get past this episode, the better, because everybody's terrible. The Grandma she's also equally terrible. And then the twist at the end with the old people makeup is just wow. Wow. Look,

Specifically, she wanted them to experience what she was experiencing, because there were none of them either had time for her or they were treating her poorly.

I got that.

What yes, so what exactly? Because they were terrible anyway.

Like Grandma, don't you get it? These people are fucking pieces of shit. I don't get it. Why do you care? You're ultimately getting away from them, like.

Well the good I kept thinking, was she getting younger while they were getting older? Like I was like, oh, that'd be kind of a nice twist, because towards agaend, she seems to be able to hear. Again. I don't know if she looks any younger, but I was kind of hoping that they would give her more of a spin that she's younger and they're suddenly getting old because the daughter, the wife is just what ah what, I'm

They have this technology in nineteen eighty five.

Nineteen eighty five, they might have had that technology. I think that they did.

They had anyway, Yeah, god, yeah, it.

Was called it was a big tin horn that stuck out of your ear.

You saw that movie too.

Oh god.

Ted Levine uses one of those.

Blud math McGrath. Now here's my first here's my first note that I read. Who am I rooting for? Here? It's like a monkey cage, the mom just cackling and the kids doing gymnastics, and grandma is delirious. Okay, so they sent them up, so we're gonna feel bad for old people who are neglected and mistreated while they're just trying to function. That's the idea. And so I had

And I thought she says, mom, she's supposed to be on his back. That's what she said. Father alone. Didn't you read the dialogue on screen? It's such patronizing shit. I was like, what the fuck is this? Or this he Henny Youngman's skit come to life? What the fuck?

Here's the thing? Like I was trying to muster sympathy for her when I thought she was just delirious, because that's how she's presented for the majority of the episode, Like she seems completely out of it. She's like walking around with a with paper towels in her hand and just pulling it off the roll. Going across the house. She's tucking her granddaughter's sweatshirt into her sweatpants for some reason.

I like the term rump side. Just use the word rump side a lot, because that's a word that never gets old.

Rump side. They've got got that whole thing where she's like, did you get the olives? Did you get the olives? And then later on she's just scarfing olives down like nobody's business. I'm like, all right, what's changed? Has something changed here?

Yeah? I see? Olives were magic all along. Don't you realize what She put her hands on him. Finally, once the family stopped give him to her, she got her wish.

I like the idea of a child just doing cartwheels around the house as a mode of traversal as well. That's how you know she's into gymnastics is that she cartwheels everywhere.

Oh my god, yeah, she's the sign. It's nineteen eighty five, leopard skirt, salmon shirt, studded neck collar, aqua button down, tied at the corners in the front, not to mention mom's blue suit with Ravotai. It is eighty five everyone.

And that teased hair on top too. Oh, you just gotta love it.

And this was a terrible episode, but I want to give props to the props department who went the extra mile. And the little girl, the teenager girl when she's studying at the at the kitchen table, her name has been written on the spine of the book like in the pages Greta. It says it on the side and on the top, which is what everyone does when they're in high school. So good on you, props thinking that up. That's all I got for positives on this.

Praise over here.

Bub Gregory Itsen, who played the sort of used car salesman retirement home guy, totally agree with you, Mike. He was the only one operating on some level that was not completely fucking annoying. And I wanted to go with him the time, and it's got to be some weird magic fucking home that that they're sending it to, does it? I think?

So that's what I That's why I couldn't figure out because we never get to see it. What is the gag? Is the gag like it's like a home like this where people shang hi their families into coming with them or what's the deal? We never find out. The image at the end of the three old people at the table and her staring at them is just it's the moment you realize that she is the real monster of the piece. But again, like that episode doesn't spend long

Old her wishes complete. They're a bunch of old focks now and now they're not going to understand each other and they're all going to be mad at each other and none.

Are they all permanently Like what's.

Going on is they're going to be dead soon and she's going to be living a high life at the retirement home. So this way, these terrible people have been at least punished. And Grandma's Graham going to get up to shit at that retirement home, she'll be punished too.

To be fair, I would want to leave a house where people said the word rumpside as many times as these weirdos do Jesus.

I mentioned the director Warner Shook. He is. He's a big player in the George Romero family. He was in Night Riders. He was the sort of announcer at the thing he played. Oh my god, I can't believe him forgetting his name. But in Father's Day he's the brother. Are we conserving energy? And when I first moved to Los Angeles, the very first theatrical performance of anything I

He is there real humdinger, that one, Ah, Jesus Christ, This then reminded me a lot of the Oh god, the episode where the grandpa just won't die? Oh why does this show like old people? Yeah, Eddie Bracken, Yeah, it's what is this show's deal with old people sticking around? What are they trying to say? What are they trying to say?

I'll tell you what it is. See, both Tilsome Dark Side and Twilight eighty five are written primarily by boomers right now in eighty On Twilight on eighty five they turned all of their fantastical notions into why am I so unsatisfied? We were supposed to have happiness? Whereas on Tails from the dark Side, they're like, this fucking older generation, won't they fuck off and die already? Kind of like some of the Dark Side's attitude better.

Yeah, yeah, at least it seems a little bit more interesting in terms of where it's coming from versus.

And mean spirited. Sometimes the mean spiritedness of this entire series is a benefit, particularly when they're dealing with unscrupulous or unappetizing humans.

But what about ditsy morons? Yeah it is, and I'm riding on in on it.

The false prophet. This is season one, episode number twenty three, written by Julie Selbo. She wrote the last episode. She also went on to write the young Indiana Jones TV movie Mystery of the Blues When when Harrison came back for the wrap around segment? Remember that, right, Jeffrey Wright. I fucking love that one. Anyway. The story is by Larry Fulton and it was directed by Gerald Cott. This

Soulpa Oklahoma, Sir Supulpa, Oklahoma. She even says where she is so Pulpa Oklahoma Baby.

That sounds a little likely available. He always wins there this one, Mike, I don't care go for it?

Yeah yeah, again, not a big fan. I think a little Ronnie Blakely goes a long way with that voice and just the acting. I don't know if she's that bad of an actress or if this was just a very poorly written parts. My god, is she annoying? And easus Mike, Wanda Sue? Why would you trust your restaurant to this lady who just comes in out of nowhere and just as a total maniac? Who I guess? I guess Wanda Sue is probably pretty pretty out there herself

What I do like about this episode is that the show seems like it was taking jabs at people that exist. Now. Because I don't know how many people y'all know like this, but I do know some people that buy into the astrology, and look, I'm not saying I do or don't, but I have met people like her, and it's does she deserve what happens to her at the end of this episode. I don't think so, because what happens here at the end of this episode is pretty bad. But she's written

Side I was a little lit town. Yeah, I think

I like when she's talking to the woman who owns the diner while the woman is unboxing horse X and she's staring off into the distance while eating the hot dog, not talk. She's talking to her but not looking at her, And it's just it's bizarre because I gotta wonder they were just like, Ronnie, would you please look at the actors when you talk to her?

Now?

I don't want to. I don't feel like it because it's so fucking weird. It's such a choice that makes It's like a choice you'd make, like when you're recounting a story that had a traumatic experience on you and said, she's just staring off into the distance eating a hot dog. What the fuck?

I noticed that lack of eye contact too, and I was just like, wait, where is her eyeline? What is she looking at? What's going on here?

It's like blind.

She never really looked at Heaton Jones either. She never really looks on contact with him. The only thing she look This might be a choice of hers, that her character is so out there that she doesn't want human contact. If that was the choice she made, Bravo. That was a good idea.

I don't know, though, Yeah, I don't know.

And that's the way she kind of performs in everything. This this is a different character than Night Run Out Street, but she's playing it basically the same.

This is she like a Is she like a known eccentric personality?

I have only known her to be, but then I have very limited context. She's not in a ton of stuff.

That's what I'm asking because, like.

I think she's more of a singer than an actress.

Yeah, she's weird.

She was and she was nominated for an oscar for Nashville too, of all things.

Yeah.

Yeah, so she's got chops, man, But I think she, like you said, I think she is more of a musician singer than she is an actress.

But she was married to Vim Vendors for two years back in the seventies and eighties. Yeah, from seventy nine to eighty one, missus Vim Vendors.

It's pretty wild.

I think that's this particular sort of character because I know a few of them here, Chris, that I would think that she would own her own tarot deck and not do this arcane dropping a penny onto a playing card that was new to me. I haven't seen that technique before. Is that something you all have encountered?

No, and the whole tails down, tails up thing. I'm just like, oh my gosh, you're very involved with this. Yeah, I thought for sure. When she said something like consulting the cards, I was like, Oh, she's got a tarot deck. Okay, just like that lady her mama's family a few episodes ago.

But horse X, that's what we're here for. Let's talk about Horror SX.

Y'all, Yeah, let's I thought it was oddly ironic that she keeps touching his screen and he keeps a to do oddly erotic.

I thought that was the point. He's like coming in his electronic pants. Also, on top of everything else, Horace X does. Look, I'm just gonna point this out here, horrorsex looks.

Like a penis.

Oh yeah, oh yeah.

Right, it looks like a cock, it looks like a it looks like a sheath a penis vertically.

So yeah.

And then her touching What is the point of this episode if not him trying to incorporate her body into his programming.

I guess, I guess help me as he has a mom like the earlier who's been communicating with him. It's very unusual.

It's yeah, it's wild. I did not expect the machine to be able to talk sentiently. I just thought that it was going to give her pat answers at first, and then no, yeah, but then it has its own language and yeah, talks about his mother and all that.

I'm like, what, Yeah, it's fucking weird. Like it's as if it's if they wanted to have William Shatner with Nika time converse with the machine, right, And it's like, that's not the point of this, Like, he doesn't have to converse directly for what's going on to matter. We can understand that him getting that card is enough and we can read into it. We don't have to have a go, please tell me your name, oh.

Every single time and then yeah, oh yeah I remember what the fuck? Yeah? Yeah. The other thing that that

So when will then be there?

Now?

Just now sued?

I found it to be very Buddhist actually living in the moment I was. I was taken by pastor Reverend heat Jones. I want to be part of that movement?

Are you trying to stop myself from saying the Reverend Horton Heat That's.

Totally every single time they said his name, I was like, Horton Heat.

Okay, Heat Jones, freak out. Yeah, heat Jones sounds like a wrestler from the nineties, the in WCW Heat Jones. Yeah. But he I feel like he's wasted in this episode because that Ronnie Blakely in the machine could have had a that could have just been the two of them, like him convincing her without the pastor being there, could.

Have been something.

It's a real bad way to end the first season of this show. That's the reality here.

The crazy part is that I'm going to recommend this one. I liked this wow for all the batshit craziness of it, And that's what I'm taking away from a lot of these now, Like the smoking one was just so fucking weird that I dug how weird it was, and it carried me this one. I was struggling until the until he Jones showed up once that. Once he was there, then it became an interesting little drama for the last ten minutes or so. But I wish he had shown up when she showed up, and there hadn't been the

So did the bus blow up or not?

No, the bus left, but I.

Thought it blew up, because no, she thought it blew up.

And then he explained about the heat lightning. Oh, when he was wherever he goes, heat lightning arrives by the way. Heat lightning is apparently not a thing that's weird.

I thought it was the thing.

Let's look it up right now, shall we, because somebody told me it wasn't, and I don't believe them. I want to believe that there is heat lightning Because I live in the middle of a desert in a valley, and right around September of every year, the the edges of the valley are absolutely ringed in lightning on some nights, and it's not like it's raining here.

According to the National Weather Service, the term heat lightning is commonly used to describe lightning from a distant thunderstorm just too far away to see the actual cloud to ground flash or hear the accompanying thunder. Oh there it is.

They got them out there in Sebobo Oklahomi Buba. That would be a funnier name.

I wish I could remember any of the Bulba's lines. I just remember what's always weed?

So that's water?

Who says that?

I just remember Watto's lying only only speaks. I have a bed. It's Jedi.

Yeah what is Bulba say? Yeah?

Sorry?

Yea Anakin says you dopeys slame pot, slow mo or something.

Come on you slow mo, humping slow.

Bow, babe, listen here slow mo.

Yeah. We might as well. Let's just go with some of the racial epithets. That's where they were pretty much.

Hey, I'm worried about my money, boy? Why is that guy, have that weird nose in those wings? And why does he sound this way? George? No reason, no, no specific reason anyways.

And it's definitely not a bunch of chinamen up in the spaceship, that's all.

Yeah, And I quote your honor. He did say chinaman China orientals better, George, I don't know neither.

I didn't cry when some chinaman took my legs in Korea.

That's not the preferred term, dude, Neither.

Of those terms are at this point.

God.

Overall, I think a good season of this show, though, I think, right, would we agree? Good season of the show overall?

There have been some clunkers, but I've never felt insulted by them.

Yeah, yeah, I think I can go there.

Yeah yeah, yeah, I think overall this is a decent season, and usually this is where all other series fall down once once we make the leap out here or definitely by three. So I'm curious now because I'm a little less familiar with season two than i am season one.

Oh nice, Yeah, I'm I'm excited to see where the show goes, if it continues to diversify the themes and tones, or if it kind of because twiad Zone eighty five was kind of always doing something different up until the end, and this show kind of seems the same way, even if they don't necessarily all work. I'm glad that not every episode is just some sort of supernatural things. Sometimes it is just rogue technology, which it's not super not supernatural,

Yeah baby, Harry Anderson and his telephone answering machine taking over his life and his screenwriting duties.

And the telephone killing that woman. Yeah, but a lot of like fear of technology in this show, which I look at the eighties so makes.

Sense word processor of the god right there?

Yeah there, Yeah, it makes sense then makes sense now.

Yeah, onward to season two.

I guess yeah. On the next episode of Midnight Viewing, we'll be taking a look at the first two episodes of season two. Those are The Impressionist with Chuck McCann. I don't know this one. I'm very excited and it also the other episode is a life bomb. Midnight Viewing the Horror Anthology podcast is a proud member of weirding Way Media. Group, and our theme song was composed by HP.

Chris Statue, weirding Way Media, tom So where you can find everything, but ranking on bond which can be found over it my Patreon or Mike's respective patreon, Patreon dot com, slash Culturecast or patreon dot com slash projection. So you can find my stuff.

How about you you can find me hanging out with Katana. She's got my back.

That's all the souls of her victims trapped with an air blade.

What some people say?

Yes, okay? Cool? As for me? Yeah, just like you guys Weardingwaymedia dot com. Over there, I got a bunch of shows. Thank you all for joining us here at midnight viewing. Until next time, try to enjoy the.

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