Ep 78: Julia Jacklin

And I was standing on stage with these coach praying.

There's like thousands of people and I'm like lifting the rain up with him, and then it stopped raining.

Hey everyone, and welcome to episode seventy eight of the podcast, where tonight's guest is Julia Jacqueline, who I recorded this episode with probably about a month ago now, and Julia had just flown into the country. She had literally got off a plane. She got a cab to our office to record this episode and then she was getting in a van to drive to Wales to play the green Man Festival the following day. So it was a very

You can you can see people leaving.

That's the other thing about festivals, Like even if they're just going to the bathroom or they want to get a kebab, or they run out a beer, or they're meaning a friend, you can still like visually see people like halfway through you're just like singing your guts out.

You just see them be like, oh yeah, time to go.

Somewhere. Else is starting over there. I just go and check that out. I feel like I've got enough, Julia jackling out of this, you.

Know, and you're just sitting like, is there not enough for you?

I feel like when I get really and that's the other thing, the festival season, you're just like it's chaotic if you're just flying in and being transferred to some place that's usually like some big field or some air hanger or some weird space and kind of thrown into the.

Mess of it.

And then yeah, sometimes you get on stage and I'm in such a weird mood. But I feel like I've been close to just being you know, being.

A bit rude.

Yeah, but that would be okay as well. I think have you ever like do you have? Because some of your songs, especially are very quiet and hushed and minimal, and I have seen you play at festivals as well as your own shows. But at your own shows, I'm aware of the fact that the audience are very respectful of that, and I normally you can hear a pin drop they're very quiet, but obviously at a festival a bit like that walking away thing. Yeah, that kind of

Yeah, I mean it's always I just always focused on because you always know that there's a massive group listening that you might not be able to feel because loud people louder than quiet people obviously.

But yeah, because that's the other thing.

You don't ever want to throw a show just because like there's some people who are not into it, because you don't want to be disrespectful to the people who were like really paying attention.

Before you were playing festivals as a musician, did you go to festivals? Yes? Which were Which are the big festivals?

Well, they're Australian ones, so they're probably not world known.

There was one called Blues.

Fest Okay, which is a pretty big one in Australia.

Is that the first one you went to?

Now, the first one I went to was one called The Great Escape, which went bankrupt.

I think it.

It had one year, right, and I was seventeen, and it was like the best two days of my hotel life.

Who played the Great Escape?

I don't even remember, Like, wait, who was it? No one that great. Not to say anything bad.

But it was like wolf Mother, Okay, like the fume that a wolf wolf Mother is still going right, but it's just the one guy, the big care.

I guess I saw them advertise on some random casino in some middle of America, but.

Playing okay, so you saw what made it. I remember the first festival I went to, and it was the best two days of my life. Yeah, it was like and I was about seventeen, Yeah, and it was just that being let off the leash, like away from your parents and being able to stay up all night and it being done. Was it like a camping festival you're outside? Yeah, yeah, exactly, like the best time ever.

Yeah it was.

Well, it was great for many reasons, like one because I had just moved high schools. So I'd moved from my first high school where I was miserable, Like I just I didn't I didn't know.

Who I was supposed to be. I was.

I knew I loved music, but none of my friends played music or cared about music. And if you were into music at school, you either liked Jack Johnson or like Ozzie hip hop.

Two. I don't have anything against Jack Johnson, but I do not like that.

Music, and I don't like his busy hip hop well definitely not the kind that was, you know, very popular at the time. So I just yeah, like I knew that, I really And then I was classical. I was doing classical singing. So I was just lost. I didn't know where I fit in musically, and so I moved high schools to the city to a music high school, and I met someone on the train who was also starting this new high school, and we became really good friends.

And I was like, a music festival. I don't know people who go to music festivals, Like, oh my gosh, I'm in heaven. Like just even meeting someone.

Who invited me to me music festival, like none of my friends, like none of my circle at my previous high school would even think.

To do that.

So so that was you know, I just felt like this door had been open to me. And yeah, I went to this festival and for one my sister's ID worked, so I had a fake ID, which is great.

Do you look much like your sister?

Yeah, okay, yeah very much.

So that was No, that's not true. Sorry, I have used I used to use my sister's idea all the time. No, what happened was I just thought as I walked in, I was like, you know what, I'm just going to show this security guard my student ID card, which said I.

Was seventeen and was also a high school ID card.

I was just like, maybe they're dumb enough to think that like nineteen ninety means that I'm of age, right, And they did, and they.

Gave me over eighteen's wristbands, and I was like.

Because they thought she wouldn't be showing me this if it proved that she was.

So that was cool and also gave me a lot of like newfound cred with like all of these new people I was just meeting because I was like, Hey, this is what I did.

I've got a wristband, I'm getting the drinks and then yeah, it was just.

Like I'd never i'd never been around like all that music before, and you know, it had like it was one of those festivals with lots of different tents and so you're just like up and close people are on stages and playing.

Instruments, and I was like, whoa.

And there was this girl at my high school. Her name is Holiday Sidewinder.

Oh, she's think Alex Cameron's pad.

Yes, yeah, So she was at my high school and I thought she was I mean, she is she's really cool and I am friends with her now, but at the time she was like at my new high school. I thought, she is the coolest person that I've ever seen in the world, and I must impress her.

Like I wanted her to like me so badly.

And so she was at the festival because she was playing with her first band, Bridezilla, which was also so crazy to me, the fact that I knew someone who went to my high school who's playing at a music festival.

I was just like, what is this world that I have entered into?

And yeah, so I kind of just I remember watching Lee Scratch Perry right, and I was with Holiday, and I was like, how can I impress her? Like how can I get in? And I was like I have to get on the stage, like I must get on this stage and she will think I'm the coolest person that has ever existed as well. So I just took a time. I took a moment. I jumped over the fence.

How drunk were you at this point?

Pretty drunk?

Okay, but not crazy drunk, because I remember the whole thing and I was still like agile and like I wasn't like you know, teenage, you know, sloppy mess. I was had my together. I just had a few drinks of courage in me, and so I jumped over the fence and then the security guards like pulled me back. But then Lise Scratch Perry looked at me and he was like, no, let her on stage, And so I got on stage and me and Lisa Gerry held hands.

Oh.

He sang this song It's and then he was singing and I just remember it started raining and maybe imagining this dream dream I know, but this is how.

Crazy this festival was for me.

It started raining and then he was like, let's sing a song to stop the rain, and he started singing this song about lifting the rain up.

And I was standing on stage with Lease Coach pray and there's like thousands.

Of people and I'm like lifting the rain up with him and then it stopped raining.

When you're stood there holding hands and you're singing this right, this rain song? Can you see Holiday signed Wine from where you are? Is that how you're looking at You're thinking the whole time? She can she see? Is she? What does she think of this? What's what's her face doing?

All I cared was that she was present and she was looking at what was going on. Okay, and yeah, she probably is so funny. I should ask her about this because she would not remember this at all.

I don't know. I think she probably would. I think she would. Did you so after the after the set, how long were you up there for? Did you was it? Did you just climb back down get back into the crowd kind of thing?

Yeah?

Yeah, okay, it.

Was like probably like probably like a full song.

Okay.

Yeah?

And what did your friends and particularly Holiday someone? What does she think? What did they think of that you were like a hero right the king? And did she then think you were like super cool?

Ah? Maybe maybe not? I don't know, Like it definitely.

Helped she was thinking I should have done I bet everyone knows what's coming ship. I should have done that. That's cool.

Yeah, no, it probably it probably helped.

I don't know if it like solidified my coolness for like the whole school year, Like I had to do a few other things.

What else did you have to do?

Like nothing, I don't know. I think that was actually the I think I peaked.

Yeah, that's kind of you can't really follow.

That, And then it was a bit downhill from there. Yeah. No, I definitely wasn't like the coolest person.

I can see why. I can now see why that was the best first two days of your life.

Yeah, like it was.

That story reminds me of the story you told me about being young, probably younger than that. I imagine when you wanted to show to people that you could sing, and you'd put your headphones on and start singing really loudly as a small girl, and with the idea of taking them off and saying, oh, sorry, was I singing out loud then? And that'd be like, you've got such an incredible voice. Yes, that kind of reminds me of that.

Yeah, that's funny. You say that because this is this is not well, this doesn't reflect well on me. I don't think.

I remember standing in the line to get food at that festival and I I was singing a song like an Angus and Julia's Stone song, and I just remember and I was. I remember singing in this line, being like, oh, I'm just casually singing. But I also was like, maybe like someone will notice how good I am at singing.

And then this woman turns around, She's like, You've got a really beautiful voice, and I was like, oh gosh, was I even was I singing? Yeah?

I mean, the starry eyedness of being seventeen can never be repeated.

Yeah, And I'm actually mourn that quite a lot. Me too, because I especially like working in music and being a music fan. I resent the fact that nothing, however much I love something, now, if I hear something, even if it's like an old thing that I've never heard before, I'm never gonna love. It's never going to mean as much to me as I did when I was seventeen.

Ever, I know.

You're never going to idolize those people in the same way, and that I think is unfair. That's why I actually that's kind of the thing I miss most about being young totally and being like a kind of hopelessly romantically walking around the streets listening to music on the way home from a party or whatever. Oh, and you can't replicate that hard. It's sad, I know.

And I find that I have like like a little glimpse of it here and there, and I chase that. I chase it so hard, but it never hits you in the same way.

You know.

Do you revisit them, the songs that used to do that to you? Do you listen to them a lot now or occasionally now?

I do?

I do, And I tend to do this a lot when I'm on the tour, and especially coming towards an end of tour, where I'm feeling old and sad and missing home, which is how I always get when I.

Yeah, that's me most days. That's my constant stage.

Regular life.

That's life.

Yeah, Like I think just at this point where I just I feel just you know, not to complain too much, I'm very I'm just very exhausted, because it's just like a lot of plain travel and just like a lot of exposure. You're just constantly like around people and constantly like, you know, I don't mind being photographed by people I trust, but I don't. I don't like it most of the time. And so just having that kind of stuff every day

So it's in those moments that I really tend to go back to that music.

And yesterday, when I was like driving through the beautiful like countryside of Portugal, I just had like my head down and I was listening to let Go Ari Leven.

And I was just thinking, like.

I was trying to remember what it felt like when I first heard Complicated.

That's the tune, isn't it. That's the sothing that isn't that the song that you said that wasn't that the song you tried to impress your dad with singing complicated?

Oh? Was it complicated? Yes, yep, it was. Yeah, there's a song.

There's also a song called I'm with You on that album, which I also.

That's also like a ballad one.

Yeah, it's like, yeah, standing on a bridge. I'm waiting in the dark. Is anybody I know?

Because things going right and everything's a mess.

Like none like listening back, like I thought, it was so profound, poetic, so poetic.

I mean, she's really not saying anything specific.

At all, just listing things, just kind of giving a vague idea of where she is and that no one else is there.

But yeah, I was listening to those songs, and yeah, I just remember feeling so much like I remembering my.

Room and I had my like JVC CD player and I would just turn that up so loud, just like line my bed, just like thinking I would die of feelings.

I would literally dissolve.

And I missed that feeling.

I know.

But I suppose at the time, you probably, I mean at the time, I can't do you think at the time you felt you enjoyed that feeding. I think I think I probably did in a weird way.

I think it was just so intense that it was just like this incredible mix of beauty and tragedy, you know, like it.

I think I really.

Enjoyed it, mostly even if even if it felt really sad, because just like being super sad felt good. And then you listened to like other sad teenage music and you're just like, we're all in this together.

Around that time, would you be listening to the Stroke song that you've just covered, Yeah, Someday was that part of that because that would have come out when you were like eleven eleven. Yeah, that's a great cover you started. You did that cover a while ago, originally right on a Yeah.

It was like two and a half years ago.

Okay, what made you put it out recently?

I think just Triple J finally got with the times put on Spotify.

There was no Yeah, a few people were like, wow, why did you finally decide to put it out? Actually, nothing, they just put it out.

We should explain to people listening to this is a cover of Someday by the Strokes that you did for a radio station called Triple J. Triple J is like Australia's like cool radio station, right, It's.

Like it's yeah, yeah, it's like our mainstream youth radio.

Okay, right right right, Well.

Like yeah, it's not mainstream.

It's not like it's like is it like six music here, yeah, which is like it's mainstream, but it plays bands, it plays like alternative sort of stuff. Who was your favorite Stroke when you're eleven, who is your favorite member?

Well, it's funny.

A lot of the bands I loved at that time, like I had no idea what they looked like.

That was a totally So.

You were a fan of the Strokes without seeing them. Yeah, I mean that's quite amazing that I'm a big Strokes fan as well. And I would say that the music stands up without looking at them, but to look at them.

As well, Yeah, very beautiful.

It's like it was a moment.

Well, it's funny because this is gonna, this is this is it ended up going to sound like a bunch of old blokes.

Like Raven about it the good old days. But you know, but at that.

Time, it was like my connection with music was all like all you would go off was like the CD cover right like I didn't, or if you bought like a magazine and they were like the pull out poster or okay, like there was a band in Australia called Grinspurn which were like I loved Grinspoon and.

Grinspoon was my first concept.

You know. I just remember walking out that concept when I was thirteen, just been like I think I just like found god like it was just I had never Yeah, it was just it was mind blowing to me, and and I was obsessed.

I listened to all their records. I just like loved it.

I knew every word, but I know, I didn't know what they looked like. And I remember going to the Ari because my dad worked for like a supermarket, and they got like three tickets, and the Aris is like our Grammys, I guess right.

And I remember standing at the Red Carpet.

When I was like, yeah, twelve or thirteen, and this this band like pulls up in a Cadillac and I just with my.

Squeaky twelve year old voice, I'm like, hew are you? And the guy and the land singer Phil was like, oh, we're a band called Grinspoon.

And I just like screamed, like I screamed my head off, but like I which was funny because.

What did they look like? Did they look how you imagine they look cool? Were they young guys?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Young?

And they had it was they were kind of like they had that like sweeping side fringe yeah yeah, situation.

So it would have been quite heartbreaking if they were like fifty year old, yeah, olding fat men, who are you and like we grinsman, You're like, oh no.

Oh no, yeah, but anyway, yeah, I like, I don't remember the Strokes. It wasn't like there are a bunch of cute boys. I think it was. But then again, I was introduced to the Strokes by a bunch of cute.

Boys, right, Okay, that's helped. Yeah, So we had a friend of yours on the podcast at the beginning of the year. Stella dominally came that podcast you it was, it would have been before the before Tricks came out. The song that you co directed the video for. Is that the first video you've directed other than your own? H yes, Yeah, it's cool. It's it's got you can kind of tell. I would say, you can kind of tell that you and Nick made it. It's got your

I cannot do anything else.

You want a music video, great, yeah, we do.

Your brochure of music is option one. Is you run around the streets and we film that. Yeah, that's it. That's what you get with us.

A muted color palette dancing suburbia. That's all we can do.

Did she have some kind of brief. Was there any kind of like or did she just say I want to make I want you? Can you just make the music video? Was that?

Well?

The tap dancing thing was just I had that idea in my head for years.

I don't know why. I just had this idea of like, I just do you know tap Dogs? Is that like a thing over here.

That rings a bell? Is that like? Is that like stomp? Yeah?

I guess I think tap Doogs was the original one, which came from Australia.

It was kind of like a tap dancing show.

They danced with brooms and things. I think that is stomp.

I think, well, I don't know if the brooms, but it's like bloodstones, white singlets, funnel shirts around the waist, jeans.

Yeah, we've definitely had that tapping on like metal surfaces and because I went to Tap Dogs when I was like seven years old, and I remember I had to wear like industrial earmuffs because it's.

Very loud, and I loved it.

So I think I just had that image in my head for years, just and I never knew what it would stick.

To, you know what I mean.

Like someone another Australian band asked me to direct a video for them like years ago, and.

I was like, yeah, tap Dogs.

But then I just didemed work out because I was on tour or something. And then when Stella asked, I was just like, this actually might work.

This might be the tap Dogs finally get rid of tap Dogs.

Yeah dog.

So yeah, it was just it just all came from this bad idea of just having like an irritating guy from.

Tap Dogs dancing around.

Dancing around being irritating and.

Anyone that's not seeing the we'll put a link to the video in the description of the podcast, but for anyone who hasn't seen yet, that's a good description of it. There's an irritating guy. That guy's really good, though. Who is that man?

He's we found him one like star search dot com.

It's a trained dancer.

Yeah, yeah, he's like a dance he teaches like I think like older people like retire East.

Because he I don't want to disrespect him because he was really good, but I couldn't tell if he was like like a really top top end professional dancer who was kind of pulling back a little bit to make it look like he was like an everyday guy dancing, or if he was going flat out, and that was him.

Going flat Yeah, I think it was.

I think maybe when he was a bit younger, he was, he was there, he was really good.

It kind of really worked out well as well because he looks great.

It's kind of how I imagine. I like to think I dance like that, right, cool, But I don't, you know, like at my absolute best, I could pull off maybe some of the worst moves he was doing. But in my mind, he looked quite free in doing it. It looked like a fun shoot to do.

Yeah, it was really fun. It was super fun. And because a music videos are just the worst, like there really are.

They're so stressful and everyone is so stressed around them and no one has any money, but everyone needs to do them. Everyone needs to do like five for every album they make. And I don't know, like I love and hate that form so much, that art form. So for me, like a music video should not be stressful, it should not cost a lot of money. And it's like the song is the that's the lead character. Like the song is what matters, and we're just creator like visuals.

Already has a narrative for.

Yeah, I don't know, Like some music videos are just so bad, like you just think how much did this cost? Like this costs like one hundred thousand dollars and it just like I don't know, I just don't think in music videos like money doesn't the more money you have doesn't mean anything.

Yours were really good the fantastic furniture for one for fucking round and it's one of my favorite videos of last yet it's great, right, it's so good. It's running around streets in Subbia, but it's in slow motions a twist. It's a twist, but it's really good. It's so simple. It's like and head alone. It's got a great video. Again you are running down the street.

Running down speed in Subia.

But that's what I want from a Julia Jackline video. But they always look good because of the lights. Always good. That's kind of a really stupid thing to say, but because they're in Australia and it looks.

The light colors and is everything about those clips as well, Like obviously it's the performance, But we filmed head alone and fucking Rolling in like a few takes between the hours of like you know, six and seven in Golden Hour, like you know, it takes an It took an hour to make both of those clips each.

So Crushing came out when we did the cover feature. It was like it was a good two or two months to four months before it was coming out. How did it go from then to releasing? How was releasing and it feels like it went It's all gone really well. It's been received incredibly well from what can tell from the outside.

Yeah, no, it's been really it's been really nice, really really great.

One of the things we spoke about when we were talking about Don't Let the Kids Win and the process of what you learned from that whole campaign, touring that record, and then when going to write Crushing, one of the things you mentioned was how, by the end of touring the first record, you've kind of felt like weird about singing these songs you'd written so long ago, and they were all quite personal and emotional songs, and you felt like you kind of turned into this cabaret version of yourself.

It's been much better this time because I mean the first record, I'd written those songs years prior, and like in the three years leading up to recording it, I recorded it, I didn't put it out for a year and a half after I recorded it, and then, you know, because it was my first record, it like started slowly and slowly built momentum, so it was a much longer process.

So that's that's kind of really good for me. Even if it's like a bit hard to perform, It's like at least I'm present, I'm present. But yeah, it's been really great.

Like the release period was not very fun, I found, yeah, which is you know, gosh, everything you say just feels like you're being a big winder.

But it just wasn't fun about that.

I just felt very.

I love playing this record so much, but I found that the press lead up was it just made me feel really icky, like talking about these songs before I had a chance to perform them. M Like it was like I had to explain the whole record before it I understood it myself or had even like played it live, like really felt what it felt like to perform these.

Songs to a crowd.

And and I don't know, it was just like I did a lot of press and I kind of talked to my manager and stuff after and I was like, I we don't have to say yes to everything, you know, Like I did a lot of press, and there were some really great interviews, like I really liked it when we did, and you know, there was ones where it felt more conversational and where people had really done some deep thinking or I had really listened to the record.

So tell us, like, have you been sexually assaulted?

Is this what the you know what Spear would ask that, yeah, totally, and like, oh, so body like is that a true story?

Tell us? Is that your ex boyfriend? Who is your ex boyfriend? And oh tell us?

Like what a you know, you're a woman in the music industry, Like tell us how to fix it?

You know.

It's just like so many intense questions, really invasive questions, and this kind of this idea that like because I'd written a personal record that therefore I was also just like this open book to talk about anything. So I found it just really like I was just constantly like trying to be polite, like dodging, and I yeah, I'm a lot more even even that that was what six months ago, and I'm like so much more confident now, Like if someone asked me a question.

That I don't answer, I'm like nope, Yeah.

But then I was trying really hard because I didn't know how the record was going to be received, and you know, I wanted I wanted good press and whatever, so I was trying to answer people questions as best I could, but it ended up I just spread myself so thin that by like release day, I was just

I'm like, well, it's kind of in the song, and.

I don't want to, like, I don't want to dismantle

You know, which is I guess in some ways true, but not really.

Like do you find like the thing you were saying about how the emotions in those songs are still in you, like not enough time has passed for that to not be be the case. Do you find it? Does that make it harder to perform them every night? Does that make it more draining? Or is it more training to go out there and pretend like you were at the end of the last two US?

Oh way more training to pretend.

Yeah.

Yeah, which is probably surprising to some people because I get that a question a lot, being like, oh my gosh, it must be so emotionally draining every night with your emotions out there on the stage, and I'm like, no, it's not because a.

Like I'm not relieving these experiences.

It's just that I still have those feelings within me, and it therefore means it makes performing them meaningful in and it makes touring easier because I feel like I'm actually doing something that means something to me, and I think that then translates for people in the crowd.

So have you got a kind of a plan for this for promoting this record, like of a point that you will just say when those are the shows done, when you feel like the shows that you when you feel like you are starting to pretend or that you're just done, are you just going to be like done, I'm going to have to go and make another record.

I hope. So, I really hope. So it's really hard with this business because it's like things just keep coming up and you get touring opportunities, and it's kind of like this big culture.

Of like take everything because soon you'll be irrelevant. Soon you'll be over the hill and no will care. So like, just work yourself to the bone while you're young and like.

Still relatively attractive.

Before the music industry because you're like, you know, gosh over thirty or something.

I'm sure.

I'm pretty sure I gave like some big statements like probably to you and probably to many people after my first album, like next tour, gonna call the shots and I'm gonna put my foot down and I'm going to do this. And then I'm like at the end of about six months of touring and be like, Okay, well, next time I will call the shuts.

You feel like you've relapsed into but you're.

Like, I'm learning, I'm getting.

And also it's one of those things like that's not That is one thing that we did talk about, and you were saying how you were learning on the first album that you were kind of wanting to please everyone all the time and like do things. It meant that you ended up doing certain things you didn't really want to do, and that was changing and you were not

So yeah, even be there, I'll be nasty. Yeah, that's true. And I don't know. I'm also I'm also I do this to myself and I love working.

I am.

I enjoy just running around doing things all the time. Like I say, I want time off, and then as soon as like I you know, I'm like, guys, I can't.

Do this anymore.

I'm just going to collapse and never get up again, Like please, I need some time off. And then I get time off and I'm like three days in Okay, Like yeah, I had I had ten days off by myself in Butte, Montana this year, like a month ago, and I was so looking forward to it, like I.

Was you were on your own now, yeah, And I.

Was just like this is going to be the best ten days of my life. Like I've just been touring so hard and like I'm just gonna be in Montana.

That's gonna be trees, it will just be me.

And myself, and like it was kind of cool that, yeah, I have a few days. I was like, Okay, not as cool as I thought.

Lonely a bit lonely, a lot of time in my own head. Not much going on.

In this place, and you really should have done this in New York.

Yeah. So I've also got to be aware that I self sabotage with working hard and that I I yeah, I really, I always take on a lot, and so it's kind of it's not everybody else's fault, it's also my own.

What are you going to do for your birthday? That's at the end of the month, right, Yeah, how are you gonna Are you going to celebrate? Do you celebrate birthdays?

I love birthday?

Do you?

I'm a big birthday That's good.

I'm trying to get back there. I feel like I felt like I always and then I just stopped not I do celebrate my birthday, but I don't feel like I kind of really tell many people have like I don't arrange something, and I feel like I'm not going to have them forever. I'm going to I'm running out. But I feel like I'm running out of birthdays now. I need to start doing it. What do you what do you have? Do you have anything planned?

Yeah? Like so, let me just give you a quick take on birthdays.

For my hot take, because I'm always trying to figure out like people like you who are like I don't really like birthdays and I don't really tell.

Me to people.

I'm always like, okay, I'm trying to get to the depths of where that comes from. I'm like, is it because you don't like your attention or is it because you are worried about like rejection.

That's another thing about no one coming about.

Like no one caring enough.

You know that if you put secure that then so then because I think a lot of people are like, oh I don't care about birthdays, like oh whatever, because they just worry that like people won't show up for them, you know, and then we're disappointed.

That's it.

Yeah, And so with my friends, like.

If they say like they're like birthdays, I'm like, I will respect you. I will respect that decision if it's because you genuinely do not want, like I don't want to be someone who's like bringing a cake to your workplace and being like I'll be a birthday too.

If you're just like, no, this is embarrassing. I hate this.

So but for people like like you, like my like my bass player Ben recently had a birthday and he was all like, oh no, that's not really saying I don't.

Really tell anyone, blah blah blah. I knew it was because like he just didn't want make a fuss about himself.

Hmmm. I think it's more that. I think it's just more like, oh, I don't want to like put you don't want to put people out. I don't want to make a fuss about it unless it's a big one. Unless it's like a zero or a five on the end. You can get away with a five. Yeah, but you know, if it's just not I but I knew.

I just with Ben, we like had a really nice dinner and I got him a cake on tour and I sang in a Casey Musgrave some of the loves on stage.

Because I was like, you just you're gotta love the attention.

It's any one day. I suppose it's your special day.

And I think as well that there's also this thing was becoming an adult that it's like I've heard some people who are adults who are like, oh, no one.

Cares about my birthday. So I'm like, well, why would they? You're an adult, Like, the only the only reason people are going to care about your birthday really is if you care about.

Your birthday, That's what I think. So I care about my birthday, okay.

But also it's just like it's an excuse to like hang out with your friends.

That's true.

It doesn't all have to be like let's praise me and the day I was born.

It can just be like, hey, this isn't this is a time. It's all like hang out and you know.

Just be together.

Sure for an occasion. I know I am going to I'm going to start good.

I think you should.

I'm going to start again. It's only been the last five years or so that I haven't. And maybe it's just my age, maybe because I'm a bit older, I mean seven.

Why you say you don't have many birthdays left? What's your well?

But I feel that you're getting into like the good birthday, do you well? Like I reckon forty, forty, fifty, sixty, they're like big, they're big celebrations.

That's like I don't want to be I don't want to be thinking about my sixty at thirsday now.

Yeah. True.

But also as I say, those end in like zero, so that big one, so you have to do something for forty If you're still alive at fifty then yeah and sixty.

Yeah anyway, Sorry, back to plans. I am going I already this is my this is the plan.

I'm going out with some friends to this bar so I can drink my teenies. Yeah, because that's just something I like now that I'm like in my late twenties. Okay, there's just something very like cool I think. I mean, it's not like cool, but it makes me feel very sophisticated and like I'm some sort of like mysterious like male author from like the fifties, sitting in a bar like drinking and dirty martini or on No Sex and City.

They didn't drink my teenie or anything. Anyway, it just feels cool.

And then we're going to watch Crossroads, which is what I did last year for my twenty eighth.

It's Crossroads the Britney Spears felt nice.

It's kind of I think that's gonna be my thing for a few years.

Okay, you've seen it before? Ously how many times have you seen that?

F couldn't count?

Okay, is it good?

I think it is.

Did you see it when it came out as a kid?

I mean I don't think it you know, it's not critically acclaimed, and I definitely at my twenty eighth birthday, everyone who was there was like, Julia, this sucks. And I was just like raging drunk, being like shut up, and I'm just like saying every word and it was like totally obnoxious. But yeah, no, it's just kind of, you know, it grounds me. It takes me back the good old days when life was simple. Anyway, good night,