Loud and Quiet presents Midnight Chats.
It's been a day of final things here at Loud and Quiet. Today we put to bed a final issue of twenty eighteen, the last one of the year, went off to print quite easily. Quite a fun one to make this issue. Actually, it's the one that features out Albums of the Year list, which is always quite a fun thing to put together because it just means you can go back and listen to a lot of things
that you maybe missed. We tend to all of our writers vote on our Albums of the Year, and a lot of the time I have missed a lot of really good records, so it's quite an education for me to put it all together. That comes out next Saturday, Saturday, the eighth of December. If you're interested in tracking down a copy or subscribing, if you subscribe now actually then you will, that will be the first one you would receive in the post. So yeah, that's all gone off
to print. It feels good to get to the end of the year. There were times when it looked like we weren't going to make it, but we've made it and now we can have a little bit of a rest, take some time off over Christmas and then we'll be back. Our first issue of next year is the second of February. There's no January issue. A little bit of closure there, and this is also the last episode of the podcast that we're going to do for the year. Will come
back probably mid feb early March. Maybe we need to go off now and record a bunch more. But this has been a really good series series six. We only wanted to do ten episodes. We ended up doing thirteen, I think because we were just offered a lot of people that we wanted to get in there. So I hope you've enjoyed it. We've had some really great people, so thank you to everyone that has come on the podcast so far. I can't believe we're at number sixty
three in total. And that's tonight's episode, and it's with Roshene Murphy who came by our office a couple of months ago. Now we recorded this a while ago, and it's you know, it's an odd one. I'm not totally convinced that Roshan was loving the experience of talking to me, if I'm totally honest, but that's fine. A lot of
people don't. And I listened back to it today. I've literally just edited this this evening to put it out in time, because we've had the magazine going on and everything, and I was kind of dreading listening back to it. I thought it might be really awkward. I'll let you be the judge of just how awkward it is or isn't. I actually think it's better than I remember it. And she has a lot of really interesting things to say.
Roshan has had a stressful year. She tried something new this year and attempted to release a twelve inch one a month for four months, and it drove her a little bit insane. She talks about that during our conversation. She was making those records with Maurice Fulton, who is an American DJ. I think he's I'm not sure where he's I've got a feeling he's from Detroit, but I might be wrong on that. He lives in Melbourne now.
And the two of them put together these four records, eight tracks in total, and were releasing them throughout the summer. But more than that, Rushing also does a lot of extra things. She's not happy to just make the record. She makes all of the videos herself, all of the visuals, all of the stage show, everything is her. Perhaps if you're old enough, you know Rushing from Malco, which was her duo with Mark Briden, Things to Make Him Do,
was the big record. They released their third album in two thousand that had sing It Back on it, the remix of sing It Back, which is still an absolute standout tune if you put that on now, it is a great song, as well as the Time Is Now, which I think is their best song. But since then, Roschen has released four albums herself. She did four in total with Moloko. And in this conversation we kind of bounce around all over the place. We talk about her
getting into music. She never thought she was going to be a singer. She thought she was going to be an artist of some sort, and meeting Mark, falling in love with him, forming Melco, accidentally getting a record deal. And although in this conversation she kind of gives herself a hard time and seems to think that she hasn't
really achieved much. I think she's achieved a load. She's maybe not been given the jews that she deserves over the years, I think, and it started to make maybe wear her down, and she's starting to think that maybe she's not really done that much. But if you go back and listen to her solo records and those Maloco records, there's just a hell of a lot of really inventive
stuff in there, some really inventive music. No one really sounded like Melco back then, and I still don't think they really do, so definitely worth visiting that again if you are unfamiliar with the Molco stuff, and the new stuff with Maurice is really good. But she did hate putting it out. She hated doing it. You can now hear that straight from Rachine. Thank you for listening to this episode, and thank you for listening to previous ones if you have already. If you haven't, please do check
them out. We're now going to be on a little bit of a break. I feel it's deserved. Thanks to Greg, he's done at least half of these over the whole of midnight Chats, and yeah, thanks to me, Thanks to me, Yeah, I've done all right as well. So this is number sixty three with Roschen Murphy and if you're interested in Loud and Quiet magazine as well, Loudenquiet dot com. Three pounds are our new subscriber off for three pounds a month, and we're deliver you a copy every time we release one,
which is nine times a year. New issue next weekend. Thank you very much. Thank you for listening to Midnight Chats.
You know, I had a gig in Belgium a few weeks ago that was just I just wanted the stage to open up and swallow me. You know. It's really everything that could have gone wrong technically did go.
Wrong right, and to the.
Point, to the point where, you know, it's like a forensic situation for two weeks after to try and figure out why this sort of thing catastrophe has gone on. You know, a series of catastrophic, catastrophic events have happened, and you can't find out. You just you can't necessarily get to the bottom of us, and you have to go then and do a gig again, not knowing if you've sorted out the glitches from the last time. So it's really hectic.
You had you sorted them out.
More or less, it was, but it could go wrong again because we didn't know. Even the next gig after that, you don't know, because we don't know really some of it.
Is there any fun in that? That adrenaline that extra danger.
Not in that No, there's no fun in that at all, But there's loads of fun in touring and doing live shows and being a performer. For me is I was born to it, really, even though I wasn't, even though I didn't think I was going to be a performer, The truth is I really, I really am. And as I get on with things in life and come across other performers, people in the same position as me, and I say it's not as easy for them and not
as enjoyable for them as it is for me. And as the years go by, I've become more and more kind of grateful for it.
Yeah, you mean in terms of getting up there some people struggle.
With really, Yeah, I mean in a way that kind of surprises me because it just not that it's not that I that I think I'm perfect at it, or that there is such a thing as being perfect at it.
But it's just easy for me. It just is, you know, I.
Just get up, either in front of a camera or on a stage or whatever, and it's when you do it obviously something that I it's natural for me.
So when I saw you in the summer and things were crazy, was it rehearsals and you had the singles were you know that's still coming out now.
I've ended up doing everything because.
You're across everything. This is the thing, isn't it. You don't just like you.
Because I'm good at everything. That ended up just.
Doing it all from the beginning, even like going way back to when you're on big record label, when you're on EMI and they kind of have like cash to get someone to take care of all these things. Were you across it all then? Were you Were you obsessed in that way then?
Yes, yes, probably, and more so in a way with em I because I was more in control of the music. So I mean there's part of me now that has to compromise. You know. The EMI record is an unusual record because it was made at my behest. It was made to with lots and lots of different producers, writers, mixers, and so the other records that I make are collaboration with another guy. You know, Maurice Fulton, you can't tell
him what to do after a certain point. Matthew Herbert, you can't tell him what to do after a certain point. Although maybe a little bit.
More than Murray Okay.
You know, Mark Brydon even in my loco, I, you know, to kind of sit back and let him when I wrote sing it back as on a house be because that was the vision I had for it, and I saw him kind of change it into something else, something beautiful, but something else before it ended up on the album.
You know, they'll go, Okay, I can't push him any further.
You won't. You won't go any further for me than that. But with the my record, I was the boss of that.
So in a way, yeah, the very stressful.
Part of that was the end of the making the record process was like telling people I was working with, I don't like that mix. I'm gonna have to take it to somebody else to mix it.
Are you good at doing that?
Saying this isn't well when you pay them a fortune, because you can do that, you know, But when when it's like very much a labor of love, like it is with Maurice or with Matthew Herbert. Well, Matthew I think did get paid. But but nowadays especially, you know, I have to be very careful who I choose to work with in terms of music because I am not going to be able to boss them around.
Are you a good do you think you're a good boss.
Yeah, I do think I'm a good boss. I don't think you'll find many people who will, you know, I think the people on the inside who work with me have a very different kind of way of looking at me than the people on the outside of the actual creative part of it.
Yeah, well, how do you think people look at you from the outside.
I think I'm a pain in the arse, or I'm difficult or vlatile.
Why do you think they why why would they think that?
What is it that makes that they don't understand me or they don't get my humor, or they're not that clever. Maybe, but the people on inside were all seriously clever people. You know, they're brilliant. They're brilliant people. I work with brilliant people, and I am what they have given me to a large extent. So that's there is a difference from the inside of the outside.
And how about having a boss? Were you ever? Were you good when you had a boss?
Never had? Have you?
Never had one? Because you got into singing young, like out of college.
Don't have it, don't have it?
There wasn't didn't go to college, don't have any archetype in this in my family even that had bosses. So we were all people who had their own businesses.
Did you never even like work in a ship path with?
I did here and there.
I had like a job in a restaurant in Sheffield that you know the trail blazed and brought you know, like chicken sees a salad to Sheffield, had like and had like said incredibly like mad chef and stuff. But I walked in on him one day and he had a knife to somebody's throat and it was like yeah, because yeah, he was he was so bigetting for you know, because he was making chicken caesar salad.
It's ridiculous.
I never lasted very long in jobs. No, but three three days? Five days? Seriously?
Was it just because you just got there and you thought I can't be told what to do in this way?
I wasn't very good at it. I wasn't good at that kind of stress. I'm not a bit well, I'm quite dyslexic and you know, and also just doing maths really quickly and quite Yeah, I'm very stressful. That stress of like running around and remembering stuff that's like banal, you know. It just I'm not good at it. No, and as I said, no, no way have I got any body in the family. There's no one on either side of the family that works for anyone. So we're
not posh people by any means. You're grafted, but we're not working class in the sense of we don't work in factories and things like that for other people.
We create our own world.
Sure. So when we spoke for the magazine, we were mainly talking about your time in Manchester when you were sixteen. From Manchester went to Sheffield, which is where the singing starts, right, Yeah, and there was a point where you were hanging out at a recording studio I seem to remember, yes, and you met Lisa Stansfield.
That was that was intant, stop stop.
But he was the guy that kind of said to you you should be a singer.
Oh. I didn't take any notice of him. No, I'm not one bit of notice of him. But yeah, he did actually say you should be something. You know from from the trip, I shouldn't.
Be doing this, no go for it.
For the listeners.
I mean in an egg and baking sandwich. He was the guy you said. No, he wasn't just the only guy. Loads of people said it to me. I actually want to think back like.
Work in music. But they didn't know.
They wouldn't say that. They would say you were going to be something.
That's all they would give you. Yeah, okay, because I.
Have no idea it was any even any good at music. I thought it was going to be a visual artist. I thought it was going to be something a photographer and filmmaker. Yeah, So I went to the chip I was at Strawberry Studios. My boyfriend at the time had like a hip hop act and he was connected with all sorts of people who made music. And on the same day I met Martin Hannah, which was quite amazing.
I remember you saying, Yeah, what was he like? Didn't you say?
He was quite sweat sweaty, very sweaty, and all I can really remember seem really nice. But so there was a lot of sweat pouring out of him while he was working over the console.
What was he do you know what he was working on?
I think he was working on a band called Rigg.
They were also friends with my boyfriends, but yes, So then I went to the chip shop with this guy who was Lisa Stansfield's A and R. And of course she was massive at the time, Lisa very big figurehead for me even anyway, but he said to me, by the time I got back to the Proficient ship shop from there with the stuff for the people, you should be something or you're going to be something.
And then the other person who said that to me was Rob Gordon who sorry Rob Mitchell, who ran Warp Records in Sheffield.
He died a few years ago. For he was a brilliant guy and they him and his wife were when I went to Sheffield. First they were friends with my boyfriend, which is why I moved to another boyfriend, which is why I moved to Sheffield, because he was finishing his architecture degree there.
So they took me in kind of in a way.
They used to feed me, and after I broke up with Pete, they remained very good friends of mine. The first time I ever my name was ever on a record, it was on a Warp compilation and it was just it was just he name checked all the people who were at a party in his house, which was a very small party, but he put us on the back of the compilation. So that's the first time I was over on a record sleeve. And he used to say to me, it's going to be something. And at that point,
you yeah, I didn't know. I didn't.
I didn't.
I went into I went into music with that attitude. I kind of went into music like I wasn't doing music, you know. I had a different sort of when I think back, I had a conceptual kind of attitude to it. You know, I was like, not as a singer at all. I didn't go into it. I mean even I was signed to a record deal before I sang it was it was things like do you like my tide sweater? And pretending to be a valley girl, you know, in
party weirdo and things like that. It was more like performance art or a conceptual view that I was sort of I was giving. That's I think what Mark was getting from me, and that was the reason why he wanted to go ahead with working with me. And I think the main reason probably was because we were really in love and just to be together was great. But he was a proper important producer at that time, you know, and he had built fon studios and you know, he
was the real thing. So and he was I was nineteen and he was thirty three when we met, right, So it was a bit of a It was a bit of a thing, you know, what's right and doing young nineteen for God's sake. But it wasn't an ordinary nineteen year old, you know, it wasn't like that. It wasn't a I wasn't a playboy, bonnie or anything. I mean, I was a handful at nineteen. What was a handful at fifteen?
You'd met Mark at a party right house? Did you start working together straight away?
Yeah? That night, really that night I went working to get the know and they wouldn't call.
It work, but recording, working on tracks.
He recorded me.
We went to Farm Studios and he recorded me saying do you like my tight sweater? She how it fits my body? And it went over this beat that he already had, and then he had another beat that he didn't have me on, and then he had the week after that, we went in and after a party as well, in the middle of the night, because obviously we were using the studio when nobody was there, and.
When we were in the mood.
You know, I'm not going to go into why we were in the mood, but in the middle of the night of a weekend, but when we were in the mood, we went in and recorded me being this valley girl, you know, because I'd started saying at the party we were at that night, we got all these probably weirdo.
And so he was like, let's go in and get that one down and all, you know.
And with those three tracks, his manager went off down to London and got a record deal and didn't tell me that he was doing that.
You're not really even singing at this point, You're just kind of talking on these three tracks.
Yeah, And I'm.
Like, are you sure Mark that you want to do this?
Were you talking about it?
It was a sixth album deal, yeah, And so.
Can you remember that moment when you went down and signed it?
Yeah?
I can.
I can because this must have been So this is this like ninety three, ninety four four, which is a time when the music industry is completely different to what it is today. Was there a big signing party. Was there was a big signing parody?
Yeah? Yeah, and it wasn't.
There wasn't a huge label Echo was.
It was like an independent label, yeah, but part of Chrystalis And they signed up publishing at the same time. So we were signed to Christmas Publishing, which was great actually and turned out to be a great thing for us, because they were a really great publishing company. They're now BMG. So now all that stuff's on.
Bmgure And what were you thinking in that moment? Like this kind of almost happened by accident in a way, and you're suddenly down in London.
As I said, you know, it wasn't like that I was ever going to be allowed to think this is it now, I'm going to be a pop star. First of all, we lived in Sheffield. Sheffield was a bubble. The way I came at it, I didn't come at it like that. I didn't come at it as somebody'd been in stage school and let's what you trying to, you know, get my talent to cross as a singer and a songwriter and all that. And as I said, I did say to Mark, what the hell are you doing?
Why do you want to sign a six album deal with me? And he said to me very smartly, and it's true, he said, it says six album deal. But if we get six albums, something is gone extremely light roaching. So I really wouldn't worry about if things go wrong, they'll.
Go roun and that's that, and it'd become a one album.
One album or two or three or whatever, you know, and so it's not like a life sentence or anything.
And so he was just up.
For it, I don't you know, and it was good. I think he must have liked and was never you know, he's never one of these guys that couldn't listen to women. He love women and stuff. So usually guys around me do they not people who have any problem with women. So he was quite happy to just my naive passion.
It was something he was quite happy to sort of soak up.
Obviously.
So what happens next? You stayed in Sheffield, didn't you. Yeah, you didn't kind of move anywhere else. You stayed up there until when was it for the first three records.
I didn't move down to London until around two thousand, right, two thousand and.
One maybe even Yeah, it's the first three were out.
Yeah, no, the last album we made, both of us were living in London, but we were no longer a boyfriend and girl, right.
Yeah, yeah, obviously that's not so. The first role came out in ninety four, okay.
So it must have been ninety three that we signed the deal, I think, Yeah.
Yeah, obviously around ninety four to ninety five is when brit pop goes mad, and it's something that.
Was really an anathema to everyone in Sheffield, was it? People were like, what's going on? Yeah, we work not like ourant god experimental music.
Even with like Pulp being in there, well.
Poulpe were in London so and had been for a very long time. They didn't seem like actually like a Sheffield band right at that point. And I didn't know anybody who made indie music in Sheffield. I only knew, you know, Richard Cook and Parrot and all these people who made incredible electronic music. And also the lineage seemed to be of that as well with Human League, and so it seemed a bit like what's going on here? Like excuse me? Did seem retrograde?
As Malca got bigger at that time.
It never felt like my loco got big. It just it really it never felt that way.
Even when it back, I felt.
Like sing it back got big. It never felt like that happened to us.
What do you think that's down to? Like, just like the club culture that Malca are a kind of more part of, where the tracks.
Zillion reasons there must be just you know, you could probably write a thesis on why, or you could just say we weren't good enough. I don't know.
I think I think Malcha did get big. I think to you it maybe didn't.
Feel like it never felt that way.
I never felt like I'd put my feet up, and now you know success has come. I've never felt that, and I still, obviously I don't feel it now. I'm constantly running to prove it and to be just better than the last thing, and you know, and and to surprise, and in a sense that's what gives me the hope and to keep going like that. I know that my next record is completely different to my last record and all that, so I know there's still this chance that
anything can happen. It's not like But what's depressing about the industry now is that they literally think they can work. It used to be that the business was about hope and about somebody would meet you and say, I believe in you. You know, I think something's gonna happen. You're gonna this is gonna kick off. Yeah, Whereas now it's like they look at everything I've done in the past.
They collate the numbers, they crunch the data, they decide how much they're going to spend versus how much they are absolutely sure that they're going to make.
And there is no mystery anymore.
There's no like it's like a science.
They think so, But of course, how can that be with art? I mean, I just don't know how person I would give up if I thought like that, I would not have the energy.
Would you have liked to have been huge?
That's very that's an impossible question.
Were you aiming for? It was? When when you're making my local records? Is that was that the aim?
No, I don't think so. Actually, it wasn't the aim. The aim was to be brilliant, I guess, to to to make records that you know.
It certainly wasn't the aim to avoid it.
Yeah, but it was perhaps the aim too more than aim to kind of just make great records. And we.
You know, I never got I was never on the slee leave.
Until the very last record. The picture of me was never on the front front of the sleeve and all that. And at the beginning, we were meant to be three dolls. We were going to be these three dolls that were dressed in raincoats, raincoat sisters, and we did a photo shoot with the with the dolls and they're on the first single, and the photo shoot didn't give us a date.
It was not enough.
Emotion in the first photo shoot, so we had we had them shot again right, which did come with a bit more emotion. But it ran around that idea because there wasn't much else we could do with those dolls. But it was never on the agenda that I would be pushed to the forefront of Malco as a as a pop star, and definitely not what I got into it for. I didn't know how I got into it, as I said, I got into it with line you don't be doing I said, Jacks, come on, let's do this.
You know, I was little like tear.
Away, you were a sonic you fat?
I was, Yes, I was.
That's part of me too, But I would by that point, I was really into all kinds of music, and especially into dance music.
What was it that got you from segue from like sonic youth and kind of punk and no wave into club music? Can you remember?
But it's all the same, you know, the more I grow up and look at it now and I kind of look at you know, it's just all the same. It's all the same. It's all got if it's gotten. I mean the genres that you're talking about, the music that I love, it has the same energy, whether it's like Rose Royce or Sonic Youth. You know, when you look at her singing in Rose Royce, she's a punk.
You know, she's like she don't give her f like she's just in it, like totally it is totally so awful, you know, And that's what I like.
There's there's no good there's no types of music that are bad or good. It's just bad or good music. And that's a cliche, but it's true.
That's true. But I suppose to make art, you have to like kind of.
Choose your Why was I not making son it?
Well you have to, Yeah, you kind of had to. Sound'm going to be in a band. I'm going to make disco music and I'm still a punk and I still make it with that spirit. But the music I'll be making is like club music. Like you still have to choose one or the other, don't you.
I don't. We didn't choose club music anyway, that's for sure. My local did not choose choose club music. I had a bit of a struggle trying to get Mark to go back to club music. It had experienced the very sort of furnace of it in this country.
It's a huge hit with.
With them house arrests and like in nineteen eighty seven, so one of the first house records that became a hit that was homegrown and and the Doll been doing it, and the Doll been in competition with each children in Sheffield as well. Now definitely there's been a lot of that going on that was quite funny as well in a way the blokes quite bitchy.
Well, Malka did very much become its own thing. Did you get lumped in with other people though? In the Britain like it felt like with britpop, if you were a guitar band, you were instantly a britpop band trip hoop and you became then a trip pop thing and part of the kind.
Of local work, you know, not being funny, But we existed before the term trip hop. So maybe we're partly to blame for it. I don't know, but certainly we weren't making trip hop when we made the record. It was finished, the finished record before anyone had termed the phrase, coined the term trip hop. So it was rather disappointing, and it was a really crappy name, even for a type of music. It seems so flighty and flyaway to kind of put these notions together, jam them together in
this postmodern way. Hip hop and you know, LSD or tripping, you know acid, they don't really go together first of all, anyway, And it's just a kind of I don't know, it just seemed.
It sounded terrible in a word. It was it was doomed, you know, it was a doomed.
Bad phrase.
For music, a bad name for a style of music, a terrible name.
So what is like?
Now? What do you consider success? I don't think about success, not at all.
Try not to other one I will get probably depressed. I just keep going every day. And as I said to you, the the the details, and people outside of the creative part of it don't understand that that sometimes I get bogged down in the details. The details. The details have to be right. The color of the grade has to be right, the edit has to be perfect, the music has to be great, the sleeve has to be gorgeous. There's no you know, I checked the spelling
on things. You know, it's like it all adds up to the experience, and I'm so busy thinking about those things. And I also to think about success because what I have is not I don't think it has proven itself to be relatively successful.
It's like, no, you don't consider yourself.
Successful, not relatively, you know.
I I think if I went around saying I'm really successful, there'll be plenty of people come along and go, what.
Do you mean you're successful?
Your last record.
Didn't even chart or you know what I mean.
There would like there's plenty of things that you could say are not successful about in my career.
You know so well, but you must think that's a certain amount of it successful. Otherwise you want to be like I have my.
Moments, like if I'm standing on stage and as the gig is going really really well, that feels like a success.
If I'm at a club but Maurice drops.
One of these records that we've made and it's in that context works perfectly, that's a success.
If I put.
A video out and you know, people who know what they're talking about it's brilliant, that's a success. If I create a look that then becomes something that's you know, a designer references or that's a success, you know, those those are kind of successes. They're small successes. And as
I said to you, I'm looking for the compound effect. Really, I'm waiting for the compound effect of all those little, tiny successes too, maybe hopefully in retrospect, will create a bigger sense of success within me, a bigger sense of achievement.
So that is success if all of those things could come together at the same time.
Better A yeah, No, I mean, at some point it just better be like compound interest, you know, at some point, it just better be that regardless as to the certain areas that I have been excluded from. You know, one day, the compound of everything that I actually have achieved will override all that. And that's what I believe that otherwise.
I couldn't go on.
Yeah, what would you do if you weren't doing this?
I'm doing everything, so I wouldn't be doing anything. Do you understand what I mean?
Everything that I can do, I'm doing every day.
I'm making film and making visual and making pictures and performing and making music and talking to you. I'm doing podcasts now myself. So I'm doing everything. So I would either do this or do nothing at all, Like I would either get into I would pull the covers over me and go to sleep for the rest of my life.
Sure, in terms of like what the music industry is now, there's all of these different things to do. Do you like the way it is now compared to the way it was? It sounds like even back then you were really hands on across anything anyway, But now that there's all of these extra things, it'd.
Be nice it us a bit more, you know.
I mean, in a way, the more I do, the less grateful the people who other people who have to gain from the work that I put in are that I find really difficult to absorb. You know, I've delivered videos in the last few months and my record label don't get in.
Touch with me. They don't even say is it because thanks for that?
Is it just because people are expected to do everything themselves now?
And yeah, I mean there's this awful culture of asking I was reading a very interesting piece about this last night.
This is awful culture of asking creative people to do stuff for free. Dreadful like.
And that cliche of where you wouldn't go into a restaurant and say give me the food for free for exposure. You know, it's like what it's dreadful, dreadful culture of that and the music industry as a whole, it had a very bad time a few years ago, for sure.
But the numbers are that last year was the best year of the music industry's entire existence ever.
There was more money made in the music business than ever before, but not the artists. It wasn't the same for the artists.
But are those numbers not skewed in the favor of like the major labels and that Spotify.
Amount of money that is being generated in the music business was the biggest amount ever last year. That's all I'm saying. I'm not going into the details of where the money went except to say that only twelve percent of it went to the artists, right, yeah, that's that.
Those are the figures, So even the big artists. You know, of course, many of the big artists now are creating their own corporations and all this kind of I'm not in the position to do that, or you know, i'd like to actually, and I think I could do it.
But you know, how have you enjoyed the singles putting out the twelve inch singles that you've done over the summer. You've got one more to come, haven't you.
I haven't enjoyed it.
You haven't enjoyed it.
The pressure just has been immense. I don't think.
I've had worse years, because I've had sadder years in my life, but I have never had this hard a year. This is the hardest things I've ever been. So when you asked me about SASS, I'm definitely not in a place where I'm thinking I'm successful, right, I'm just thinking. But I do think I'm bloody good. I mean, I do think what I do is, you know, more and more as the years go by. If anything, the quality is going up and up what I do because I'm just I have to.
I just absolutely have to make it brilliant.
But the singles have been tough.
It's been tough. Yeah, can't put out four singles. It was meant to be one a month. In the end, after two, I was totally exhausted, wiped out, you know, not because I'm putting out singles, but because of everything that goes around them.
And I have to make everything that goes around them.
And as I said to you, I have to check even the very you know, the fine print of things because other people aren't. I don't have like you see, I was never one for even knowing what people's jobs were in the record companies that I was in with a production manager, and I don't I don't have one of them, and don't have all sorts of there's all sorts of people that are not lots of titles that you think I know what they do, but I know they're not there anymore, right, Yeah, And I know what
it means now. It means that I have to check absolutely everything, and so it's it's bolic, you know. And so after two I nearly had a breakdown. Seriously, Yeah, I'm close again now really because this last video I've stretched I've stretched time and space and money. You know, I've warped.
Reality getting this video that's about to come tomorrow. But you see, I really think I'm good at it. I do think I'm good at.
It, and be a shame not to do to that.
Do me, you know, to do me.
I think it probably comes back to the fact that when you got into music looking at it from a different angle, from like a more conceptual angle anyway, and as someone that thought they might be a conceptual artist.
So why I don't ever thought would be a conceptual artist? Or maybe I did, Yes, I suppose I loath to admit it though, now Jesus, what a bunch of arseholes they are.
But you know, you, you came at it from that world or that mindset, whereas, like you know, most people, a lot of people, I suppose that the standard way that musicians think is like, I just want to be the musician. Someone else can deal with this.
That's just like people. I'm telling you, that is so easy. It's too easy for me. I just get in the studio and before I leave that day, there's a song there. I just think to myself, I want to make a record. A look around, and there's always someone there in my life who's brilliant, brilliant to help me with it. It's easy.
It's sang I sing, I opened me gop, I opened my gob say.
When I was eleven, I sang don't Cry from me Argentina in front of my parents and my grandmother and my uncle and mean and the cousins, and they all went jeez, roachingk and sing, and then every time they drank they ran after me to sing don't Cry from my Argentina, and I ran as fast as I want to get away from them, you know what I mean, Just like you open your gob and the voice is there. It's easy.
It's not even like I didn't even have to learn an instrument, you know.
That's totally another, like a language that I don't that I don't speak, you know. But yeah, making music the way I make music, collaborating with these brilliant people, it's too easy. I couldn't possibly, I couldn't possibly feel good about yourself just doing that.
Yeah, there's a piece of piece.
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