Dusty, Denim, and Dead Tooth

Forever.

Hello, Hi friend, Hi baby Hei you sweeties honey babies, baby, sweetie Poe. Imagine that's how we talked.

Well, there's a baby in the studio right now.

You look just like you're dead.

Yeah, we we do sound effects now on this podcast.

We should get a little soundboard.

We it.

Yo, we've gotten to that point where we're like, yeah, I just want to make noise. I mean, isn't that what a podcast is is just noise?

I suppose, Or let's what a podcast is. Let's let's break down just language. Isn't language just noise?

Sure? Sure, sure, if that's what you want to You know, when people talk, it does just seem like, no, that's what words are is just noise.

But really always like mess me up? Is laughter?

I feel like laughter is such a weird concept, right, Like, no, it's like an addition of just like ha ha ha, Like that's so weird.

Andrew, Andrew.

If you hanging out with people who laugh, ha ha ha, those people are not actually laughing, Yeah, they're they're laughing at you and very laughter.

You've never heard real laughter, sweetie.

Okay, that's why it's weird. Got it?

Also, I have like I don't know, maybe like ten variations of my laugh. There's like so many different versions of how I can laugh at somebody. There's like surprised laugh.

Ah, that's laugh, shady laugh, messy laugh. A someone fell and bust their ass. That is good, nervous laugh, Sidney, total funny joke. Las, God's my beach. I love what we do here on the pod. It's so beautiful.

I was running late to the pod today per usual, and I was like, I think I'm ready to start having guests on the podcast again.

Yeah, I think it's time, friend. I mean people have been like, hey, I would love to be on the pod again, and I'm like, okay, okay, well, I guess we should do that. I mean, we've been on Zoom long enough and I think it's I think it's time. But I will like to do a round of applause for us doing it so many months by ourselves. Let's do it.

Well.

I think the reason why we weren't doing guests is because we were like, oh, we're gonna be back in the studio in a couple of months, and now it's like, oh no, we're still here and Halloween is around the ever happens so I just you know, Also, I feel like we're doing all the heavy lifting. I need a little guest to come in here and share their mess so we can judge.

Them, I know. And it's just like I'm not being whore, so it's it's hard for me to come in for energy anything. Yeah, I mean I'm trying to get I'm trying to get mad.

Okay, you know, Okay, I think we are back on opposite ends of the spectrum against this because are we ever on the same through are ever on the same I now am ready to possibly be back on these dating streets and get my hole on.

I think that's where I am, you know, and you're you're trying to do it while the cold is coming.

Winter is coming, and I feel like the sun is gonna start setting it like two pm, and I need some of these men to like entertain enlighten and you know, spoil me.

So yeah, I think Winter on his peak. I mean also yes, yes, yes, I mean I was cuffed for the for the spring. I feel like Fall is you know, fall out of some strange man's bed season. Yeah, follow the title fall, the Gap, the gap boop. Yeah. I actually went on a little date this weekend. I don't even wow, let's talk about it, because I'm not gonna say it's a date, friend, but it is an experience that we can about. So let's go. Baby, talk to me. What you're wearing, said.

The same wearing I was wearing, like a light blue denim cuffed, you know, relaxed fit I was giving.

She's like, I don't take you seriously.

I was giving a fitted body suit with a V neck, deep V bodysuit. Because you sometimes you got sexiest. Sometimes you got to give them. You know, you gotta give high low, you gotta give tight, loose, You got to give a little alio on the top, a little bit of big pun on the bottom. So the bottoms was loose, top was tight. I had on these sneakers that Quarantine Bay got for me for my birthday.

Happy birthday.

Living your life like gets golded.

Important because when I was out, people kept stopping me to talk about my shoes, right.

And it was mainly like it.

It was some black girls, but it was a lot of men, So that's important to That's why I'm saying this wasn't really a date.

Yeah, I kind of want to be a sneakers I think that this is who I am.

I try to put some little ankle boots on the other day and my feet were like, what is what is this?

What is this?

Prison?

You gotta sind It was like way way and We're like no. My ankles didn't like it. The ball on my feet didn't like it. My big toe hated it.

I was like, I'm gonna put these sneakers back on.

Yeah, I think she's a sneaker right now. I mean you got sneakers too, You got those rebox that you have.

I had mine on today. Sneakers are just more comfortable they are. And at the end of the day, what are we wearing heels for now?

Like?

Where what are we doing?

Well?

That was the conundrum syst because I knew we were going to be standing outside.

I was like, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna be sitting.

I'm gonna be standing the entire hour and a half that I'm out of my house.

I was like, I'm gonna put on some That's how long the day was, That's how long. That's gathering. We fell into the gap, Well, we didn't fall into the gap. I went home by myself.

But uh yeah, So he was running late. The place was across the street from my house, so I was also running late. I said, well, let me know when you get there. Also, I realized, if the closer I'm going to my house, the closer so I'm going to something that's near my house, the later I'm going to be. So you know, I get there and I vaguely remembered

It's not him, So like I was like, oh, so I took half a.

Step away from them, and I heard her go do you know her?

And he was like And then the dude who I was actually meeting comes from around the corner, and he looked like a smaller, uglier version of that. Oh no, Marie, I'm not saying that he was ugly, a lot like a less attractive version of the person that I had talked to.

Also shorter, shorten him.

Because the dude, I think mainly what hurts is, well, the.

Dude his thing says he's six feet, so I have no concept of height either. Six feet is my or it's you know, all the way to the ceiling. So I saw this tall dude and I was like that that looks like feet o kai.

He's like hey.

You.

Meanwhile, full on woman is right next to him. Do you know her?

And he was like, so this guy comes around the corner. He's wearing a distressed black denim jacket. So already turned off because it was like a weird distressed. It was like, did you do this? He was wearing a g star why like why why you look like that? It was so it wasn't a gesuit was He told me it was a gift from his friends. I was like, you need to get some new friends.

Oh buffalo, yes, yes, yes, well yes the sneaker exactly.

So so people kept recognizing me that night, Like I bunded to this woman who I used to intern for in like twenty ten. Somebody recognized me from stand up. He was like Marie and I was like, uh huh, funny story. He was like, he's like this might be a bit personal, but how's your mom doing? And I was like my mom.

I was like my mom. He was like, yeah, your mom, how is she doing?

Didn't you post that you were on Instagram that you had like gotten into it with your mom and I was like no, and he was.

Like, oh my god.

Yeah, He's like sorry, you guys are always together and always doing videos together and stuff.

So I confused, Oh my god, not an idiot, but just like damn bro, like get we are not the same. We are not.

It was funny though, because he was like, yeah, you guys are always together, so I'm confused.

I was like, so you confused our mom?

Well, I mean I thought I don't know because your mom's a nurse, right. I feel like it was like a valid question, you know.

Yeah, but I don't talk enough my mom.

Marie's mom is to I mean like she's she's out and.

Yeah.

But the way he asked the question, it wasn't like your mom is good at work. I know she's an essential worker. No, he was like, how's everything with your mom?

She's good? And I was like, are y'all talking your question?

Like I don't, like I would hate to be like like Sydney like in that situation if you have got that question in public, that would really like fuck me up because it's like I don't want to be think about this right now.

He's like, hell, yeah, he's He's like, can I ask you a personal question?

If he hadn't breakfaced it with that then and he asked me how my mom was doing, I would have been like, oh, she's fine.

But because he was like, can I ask.

You a personal question? How's your mom?

I was like, h she good and she doesn't know you anyway. So this guy that I was meeting for this date, let's call him Dusty Denim. So Dusty Dinnim. Oh my god, So Denim, what.

If I don't care?

You know, I don't care, all the more reason for us to get some gifts so I can stop being mean to people that hung out with this weekend. So he we're online for these drinks. He's like, oh, two of my homegirls are up there. I'm gonna give them my card so they can get our drinks. I said, great, fab, I'm still won't be staying on his sidewalk either way. So they bring the drinks out. He doesn't introduce me to them, and so I don't know their names, they don't know my name. So now it's not really a

I think that's that's where either he he well, the fact that he told you that that was his homegirls means like he wants you to know who they are, but he doesn't want to know. He doesn't want them to know.

When he gets even stranger, he's like, she need to go get her bag out my car, or she needs to put her bag in my car.

We'll be back or something. And I turned around. They're gone.

Him and this girl were going for like twenty minutes. I'm Marie Punch on the sidewalk.

He's falling into the gap with somebody else. But you know, I mean, let's talk about it.

It's something must have fallen into the gap of his mouth because his breath was a little bit hot, So I said, so when I met him, So okay, So that so three things hold on you feel something. Things were wrong when I met him before we even started the date. One, he was shorter than I thought he was going to be, and he was less hot than the first guy that I spoke to. Two he had that gross jacket on Three his breath was bad.

Okay, so wait, like what kind of like it was like eight, I've had my mask on him all day.

I need a solids, something stuck between the molars in the back.

It's I have a dirt. I have a dead too, dead tooth, dead to right. Oh that's a good uh title.

So yeah, So he he leaves me with this girl who I don't know, and disappears with another girl I definitely don't know. So some creepy man comes over and he's like he's drunk and he's like talking to us, and I, yes.

That guy, that guy, and that's the DNIM. That's the jacket. He's got the same jacket on the nerve with the jeans to what the jeans were doing, siss, but that that he might he might have had on like men's leggings or something.

I don't remember what the pants were. But that's the so and you was in the photo. He's not ugly in the photo, but he he was giving corny vibes in the photo and he was giving real corny vibes in real life. So when they disappeared for those twenty minutes, I was like, Oh, I'm not even on a date. I'm just I'm just having a drink across the street and then I'm going home, mind you. I fully was thinking, Oh, I can just drink this on my couch. Like I was like, I was getting ready.

To walk across the street. You should have got you should have had to go. They're not giving you real cups at these places.

Oh so you could have just.

Left, friend, after twenty minutes, I would have been like, well, I'm gone. After after I told.

You, people kept like recognizing me or talking to me or so I'm having conversations with full on their men. When he gets back and you know, the place was closing. I got there ten. The bar closed at like eleven. We were there till maybe eleven thirty. I was going home. So I bumped to this guy. This guy's looking at my sneakers, you know, from this man, and he's.

Like, oh, I love those. How you get those?

These sneakers are like like exclusives or something.

And he was like, who's your sneaker plug?

And I was like, oh, I do have a plug this guy and we're talking.

Can I talk to that? Can I get some sneakers? I mean, obviously i'll pay, You're gonna pay, You're gonna pay him.

Pussy is that this depends on how much money you're trying to spend.

Okay, we'll talk about this off, we'll talk anyway.

So you know, the day quote unquote ended. But they were talking to me about my sneakers and they're like, well, where did you get those?

And they were being annoying.

The girl that went to the car with him was being very aggressive with me, and I.

Did not like her, like aggressive.

She was drunk, and so she was like like this guy started to fall and he like leaned on my shoulders some other strange man, and I turned out of it and I left them, like somebody started to fall on me and I moved and they're like, she was like, you ran away and left us. Okay, I'm supposed to just let this man timber on top of me, Like what do you what?

You very aggressive? She was drunk.

So they were like talking about my shoes and they're like, well.

Where you got the shoes? Who's the blood?

Who's And I was like this dude that I'm banging my man, my man, my man got me these shoes.

And they're like you're man, my man, and they're all good. It just jumped out of you. I'm never gonna jump this man.

Again, I have zero interest in having another converse after this sentence comes out of my mouth.

He left you for twenty minutes, that's grounds for you to have already.

Lest he's like, can I walk you home?

After I said that, after I had these conversations with these other people on this sidewalk, He's like, can I walk you home?

I was like, no, no, sir, can I. I don't need you to know where I live.

I mean, then he watched.

I think he kind of he saw me cross the street and walk right into my house.

So that but.

So that's why I'm saying I didn't really go on a date. I was outside, somebody paid for my drink, But it wasn't actually a date.

Girl. That is great story, but that was just kind of a waste of time. What the fuck it was? How do you leave somebody for twenty minutes? Did you ask him? So what happened? You know what? I didn't because I didn't care, because you didn't care.

I'm not I'm not fighting with you in that jacket on this street.

In front of the bar that people know me at. No way, this is your cheers. Everybody knows your name.

Was my house from here I'm not about to argue with you on this curb. I can leave at any time.

I was just yeah, and I can call the nigga who got me these sneakers. They'd have a good old that part.

But it was like, but it also made me like appreciate him more because it was like, you know, like I like, I actually like being with him, and like I like being out with him this dude that I was out with the dead tooth. I was like, Mmm, I'm gonna stand here and you stand there. The streets are getting but it feels good to like have an excuse to get dressed and like put a little bit of makeup on and like secure my wig.

And go outside.

So that's why I think I want to go back out and be on these dating streets.

You know, it feels like it's done. I'm glad you did that because I mean, you know, one, we need content and two it's like which truly, Marie, this should be your video for Patreon.

About going out with a man with a dead tooth. No, Sydney, it's for tomorrow, your video that you have to post on that. I don't think I'm gonna do that.

Why you think he's following.

It has nothing to do This has nothing to do with creating content and chronicle. It is because you sometimes you're like, I don't really need to go out, but I do need to go out. I need to do this because you never know what's gonna happen while you're talking about this. It make a picture of you talking so that I can post this in the stories of discounts also as content for the creator chronicles.

Yeah, it's like, this is what you gotta do. There's so many things that I'm like, I'm not doing this, and then I'm like, actually i am because I know something is gonna come about, and then I'll have something to either joke about, tell a story about, or just like brainstorm on making a lie. See.

But you know what though, Also, I'm gonna say when I woke up in the morning, like the date was tragic.

I mean the.

M I'm not evenna say the date was tragic.

I'm not calling. I'm not calling. It was meat, the meeting of the meat was whatever.

But like I didn't feel bad when I got home.

I felt great still, and then when I woke up in the morning, I felt good too. And I think it's because it's important to go outside and interact with people. Yes, you gotta do it safely. Yes you need a socially distance. Yes people were wearing masks and everything like that. But like it feels good to like it almost felt normal again to be outside and like talking to people and talking about comedy and talking to people, like bumping into people that I would bump into when I was doing shows.

So it was like, it's simple.

I think that that's why it's like pushing me to like go out on these dates or whatever it is, cause it's like I'm I'm not meeting anybody new, I'm talking to my friends, I'm sticking with my pod.

And I just feel like I need I don't.

Know new blood in my social circles. So that's That's where I'm at with this.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Never, I feel like lately like I've been like really like lacking like any social interaction. So like when I do actually interact with anybody, I feel like completely like socially uncomfortable, socially awkward. I can hold a conversation on zoom or on the phone, but the second that like we're interacting in person, like even it's like close friends it's just like almost like robot mode because we're.

All out of practice. Yeah, we're all Like.

I've noticed that I can't really keep eye contact no more like when I'm talking. When I'm talking, my eyes everywhere, But when somebody else is talking, I can give you direct eye contact.

But I went out to brunch last weekend with a friend and like, and I was like I couldn't make eye contact with her, and like I was like constantly looking and she was like, what are you looking at? And I was like, I'm sorry, Like I didn't even.

You're like this is weird for me.

I'm sorry, but I get that that that's such a real thing that you're feeling.

Yeah, yeah, I don't want to do the big group thing. I'm not here for that. I like, I can go out like with one or two people, but then when it's a lot of people around, I like turn into a snail and I want to like go back in my shell, go back in my apartment with all the fucking lights and plants, and just keep a cute. I'd rather somebody come to my house than just be at like a restaurant.

I and I remember that we were Carolina was having her birthday party in the backyard and we were all eating this delicious Dominican Rice and Sydney took her plate and went in the house and ate it with her door open.

Right, It's like, what you doing it? Yep. She's like, it's too many people out there, and I get that too many.

We were like all out of practice and also like trying to be careful as careful.

As we can be. Right now, Okay, and this great. You see how I said that way into what we're about to talk about now, someone left a really review. You know, it felt very yelping. It didn't feel very iTunes. It was like, oh, you just came here to complain, okay, Sis, let's go. So it says so yoh yeah, I was ready. I was ready for this, it says so their trip to Mexico dot dot dot. You're frustrated, but three months ago you would have never made this trip to Mexico.

I understand disrespect in the tone of this review, and they gave us three stars.

Scutiney scott Me.

Saying you're encouraging others to do the same as you, and they may not be as militant as you.

So which one is it? Are people going to do what we're doing? Pick what you're talking about? Are people going to Are people going to do what we're doing or people not gonna do what we're doing? Which is it?

Because how many how many stars they get three? They left the review, but they left the review before they heard our episode because they left this two days after my birthday.

So we were we were in Mexico when this person was like, let me tell them what I think about what they're doing. If you want to go to tou Loom, booble, go to Touloom. If you don't want to go, stay home. Do what feels the most comfortable and makes the most sense for you. But know that everybody that I was in Too Loom with is people that I've been with the entire pandemic.

Okay, yeah, And we were very very safe, very safe. Like we got a house that already had a pool and we were mainly in the house. We went out to get groceries and let me tell you, and to Loom, they were being way safer than we anywhere shoes before we could get into an establishment. I'm like that they're testing, they're testing, they're giving hands down and tested, they're doing what they have to. Everybody has a mask on, like

Thing that like stood up to me.

I feel like this person is probably just jaded because they're probably not in a living situation where they feel like they can risk like a trip to Mexico.

So that's what's that saying. Maybe they leave with somebody who's high risk or whatever. We all live alone, sweetheart. Sorry anybody at risk by so don't.

I don't think it's necessarily about you. I feel like that this person's probably just mad about seeing it's not probably not directly at you, even though it is a review on your podcast. But they're probably just mad at a bunch of other people living their life and whatever, and they're probably in a situation where they're stuck inside. I'm just probably giving them the benefit.

Of the doubt here, Andrew, I'm I'm fine with true true given them Thank you for being the dissenting ye in here, but saying that this is beyond selfish.

Absolutely Sis.

It's my birthday. I was with my friends, my sister, my people. We did it because this is something that we needed to do. The way that I was feeling before the trip, the way I was feeling before I decided to take the trip, is a complete one pint eighty of how I feel right now. The way that I that my brain is like it's like reactivated. There's something about anticipating a trip, planning for that trip, and then going on the trip that like elevates your mood.

Or being very safe, I mean very safe. I will stand by that. And then when we came back, like I stayed home, got a test. I wasn't really seeing anybody until I knew that I was fine, And you know, everybody can get out now, Like people are at restaurants indoors.

The same day that you wrote their review sis, they opened.

The gag, the gag which you know, I'm not. I'm not coming at you. I'm not mas like I like, I see where you could say that it's selfish. But selfish is like going on a trip willy nilly, not taking the precautions and then going out and about into loom, not knowing your status and infecting other people, which is not the case when you're on the plane. When you're in the airport, people have to have a mask on.

I was actually surprised at how they were like doing it at the airport. They were like they were only boarding like a couple rows at a time. They boarded from the back of the plane to the front. All the middle seats were blocked off. And then this person says, it doesn't matter if you're getting tested and the next day you get the results, you're encouraging others to do the same as you.

Uh, yes we are.

We're telling you to go get tested, gets you a twenty four hour test, so you know sooner rather than later, and you can make the moves that you're making smartly.

So that's that's unlike unlike Trump who's saying like, oh, we can't beat this, we can beat this. Don't don't let it get the best.

Of you because he's not healthier than twenty years like that. It's not a fucking spot.

Now, don't wear you don't need to wear a mask.

You know, he got hyper high blood pressure, high cholesterol. He probably about to lose his foot before he loses this election.

And we're not saying that. We're not saying that, and you know, I was a little apprehensive about the trip too. And I will say that we we didn't really post a lot while we were there. We weren't like making it this grand. We weren't grand standing our trip. We took it. We had fun, we took some pictures, we posted a few, but it wasn't like, oh.

My god, everybody traveled ourselves. But also it was really just a bot for us. You're saying that we're influencers, knowing that we didn't post anything when we got to Mexico.

You didn't even know that we were.

I started posting I think the day after my birthday in the stories, so for you to be like, you know, y'all people are looking up to y'all and doing what y'all would do. We were being very quiet compared to what we could have been in any other instance of us taking a trip together.

And let's be real. Real people are taking these trips and not posting, and you don't know anything about it they're doing. People are out here doing the ship. Don't be don't be fool, don't be fool. People are out here. So I'd rather be honest and not like lie and withhold the truth, like, oh that I'm not out, but I am. But I'm trying to be as safe as something.

I don't know if it's gonna how it's gonna.

All right, hold on here.

I'm a Scottany apologist. Yeah, no, okay. So my issue is that every time that you read a podcast review, I feel like it's it's primarily negative ones. And you ask for podcast reviews and you have the thousands of reviews where they're all happy, but then you choose the one the.

Highlight that's not true.

We reread the positive true.

We wouldn't stay positive when people letting our damns and they're like, oh, you know, I'm a professor in Wyoming women's studies and I'm not really your demographic. Like I still remember the good ones. I remember when people yeah, And I feel.

Like for every bad one, I feel like we should also be saying, like three good ones, you know what I mean.

Maybe not three good ones. Here's a good one.

I think, like, I love this podcast and I like Andrew talking more.

That's the part that's the review that somebody lived.

Okay, great, oh thank you. That was a setup for you to say that exact review.

Thank you. Okay, another one, How are they not crazy famous? Marie and Sydney are so hilarious. I truly don't know why they're not hosting their own TV shows at this point. Listen to this show, make your life better. End of review. Yeah, like, people are saying great things and we're over one thousand reviews. Finally, Oh my god, only took us four years. Yay upsess. But yeah, no, we know that y'all are out here loving us down and supporting us and telling other people

It thinks that you're affecting people's lives in other.

Ways, Well, Scutiny, no, but Scutney or Scotney, let me say Scutiney.

Scutney is right.

We being on a trip, Like the reason why I wanted to go to Mexico in the first place is because everybody on my Instagram was in Mexico, so that so, yes, there is something to be said about seeing somebody take a trip and then putting the idea in your head and then you're like, should we also?

But but but babe, you don't know. I mean, you do know.

We talked about what precautions we took, so you know, don't tell us to grow up and go home or grow hop and stay home. We are grown up, so we can go outside. And if you're somebody who's listening to this and you feel the same way as Scutiny, you know that's unfortunate for you, babe. But people are going to continue to live their lives regardless of whether this pandemic last another year or not. God forbid it does.

Gee, I would really love that. And that is another great segue, because let me tell you what I was spending my fucking time. I was not going on a date. I was on Facebook, like this book just in a Yeah, I was. You know, it's dark when you're on Facebook.

People who've been affected by the whole world is affected by it, honestly, but two hundred and eleven thousand people have died in this country from it.

So you know, I just because, so what.

Are you talking about? And it's like, this is the same type of people who overlooked like why people were marching and focused on the looters. Baby girl, if you can't figure out why people are looting or why people are marching or writing, then you are missing the whole point. Looting didn't just happen for all of a sudden, And also the looters are not the same as the people who are actually marching to talk about that, like, oh,

Like stop it, just stop.

And this is the same person I was like, you don't even have enough black people in your life to even be commenting. Ye just hush.

Well, I mean that's also a good reason to stay on Facebook, sis, the fact, the fact that you still have heating your account locked in and you know how to get in and out of the Book of Faces. I don't know nothing about Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook anymore. So that's that's the problematic.

Yeah, it was, it was. It was rough, and I need to work on myself. But that's that is another segway. You can just do the.

Time.

You can just you can just be like and that brings me to my other point, or I just need you to smooth out these segways. I feel like I feel like we I'm just Alley opening them to you and you're just like, it's speaking of segs and it's like, isn't a segway a car.

Scooter?

Yeah? Yeah, anyway, didn't the segway creator. I'm not scutiny, Okay, I need you to back up off me, get up off my neck, and if I want to say fucking seg on I'll do that. I don't care. I will be someone's This is my comedy.

What's the stuff that Trump was saying, take a shot of bleach. Every time Sidney says the word segue.

Bitch bye, whatever you talk about, whatever you want to know, I'm gonna say the guy that who created seg wait, didn't he die? You want to segue?

Did he really?

I think he, like.

Or some barns of Seleno and Barnes died in the plane crash last week.

All that Seleno and Barnes is just Seleno now in Barnes.

Saying Seleno in Barnes injury eight hundred Yes.

And plane was flying.

Uh huh.

He was actually flying a plane. Yeah.

Yeah, you know, rich people be you know, they be getting a little little a little jitny together and they fly after a couple of flight lessons. Yeah, he died. I wonder how Seleno is doing well.

They broke up.

I think I think they broke up before he like last year or something. I think they were ahead.

What's the other duo, Jacoby and Myers. So maybe Jacoby and Myers broke up, but Selena and Barnes were still cool.

Yeah, I'm not entirely. Sure, I'll do some I'll do some fact checking.

Yeah, okay, Sidney, we could be this is given the leaving the lane wide open for us to be the new Seleno.

In Barnes Injury Attorneys.

Injury, Sydney, you mad about the segue?

No? No, no, do you think?

Oh? I wanted to talk about Meg the Stallion real quick because she did SNL on Saturday. I guess that's how I say us and she. I didn't watch the performance. I just caught the end when she was talking about black women being the most disrespected people in America, and she brought up Daniel whatever his last name is, that the attorney general of the Breonna Taylor case. I didn't realize that he's engaged to Miss Mitch m Miss Mitch McConnell's granddaughter.

Really or niece or something there.

Right now, so he it seems like they've kind of been grooming him to be exactly who he is right now.

No beautiful, beautiful cis no no, no, I'm being sarcastic.

So that's problematic but not surprising. But I would love to know what his mom thinks about what's happening right now. I hope his mother has him on the prayer list that her church, because you know, all skin folk ain't kin folk, is what.

No, And we already knew that, but you know, Meghan, I saw the performance and I was like, damn, she's doing the song that's like kind of like high energy and she wasn't given or like Meg the Stallion like vibes. It just seemed a little bit more demure. And it was because she was gonna hit us with the protect Black Women. And I was like, oh, this is this is gorgeous. Yes, at first I was like, oh, maybe she's not pushing it and pumping it because maybe like

I mean, heartstop.

Imagine being shot, but then imagine being shot at twenty four years old by somebody that you know, Yeah, there's three things in that sentence that you're held up four fingers. There's three things in that sentence that it's like wait what. And then after that happens, people are saying, well, what did she do to get shot? And well, she's you know, she's she probably did something to him first, and well she's big, so she doesn't need protecting from Tory Lanes.

And it's like what what?

Well there was like some like was it Tory Lanes that tried to like say that she she stepped on broken glass and she wasn't actually shot.

Did you hear that report?

I don't care about anything that man is saying because all of it is l I e s and you know, he is not remorseful and he just sucks. And he's an example of most men who do trash things to women and get off Like he's not in jail, he's his dudo self.

I just think it's wild because, like, imagine if this happened like Taylor Swift, we would not hear the end of it. Oh my, we're still on the Kanye. Yeah, like over ten years ago.

She wasn't shot.

She was she wasn't shot. She didn't win an award.

That or no, she won the award and then Kanye jumped on stage.

She wasn't shot. She was shocked.

Okay, Yeah, and and and it's it was I think it was a vm A.

It wasn't even for a Grammy.

It was the best music, but it's stupid.

Yeah, it was for a Video Music Award.

So you know, oh, like, let's put everything in perspective and really look at how people don't care about Black women and they, you know, they like to say that like black women are Oh. I had a conversation with somebody yesterday and she was speaking to her aunt, and her aunt was like, black women are too independent and that's why they don't have men, or that's why men

And I was like, du du fuck you logic right there.

Her aunt said that, she said black women are too independent in twenty twenty and that's why men don't want to date us. And it was like, that's not why men don't want to date us, that's what That's not why these the ignorant ones anyway to want to date us.

Also, wouldn't you want to be with somebody who's independent and I don't want to date them? So let's chalk that up to it's a win win situation for me. I'm good on the men's it doesn't matter if they black or white or or see through. I'm all set so that that conversations, I mean, but also away kill the conversation.

Can we look at why black women have to be so independent? It's because people don't do stuff for us and don't want to do stuff for us. Black men leave us hanging all the time. And I'm not saying all of them, but they're like this whole Meghan. The Stallion thing showed us that they were like.

Roasting that woman is a celebrity, She has so much money and people still didn't have her back. Now, imagine not having anybody have your back and being that well known and then being some random, not random, but just some you know, relatable black woman that works at CVS. They not think about her other so period on that so sad way to bring the mood down, Sydney, what's your what's your happy segment? No, happy segway, happy Seguey, I'm talking about sperm with my lady. Uh yeah, we're

You guys are having conversations about sperm as in to get pregnant. Okay, isn't there like two other conversations that have to happen before that?

Yeah? Yeah, definitely, like engaged, moving in. But we we have to think it's just the The starting a family for gays is just a It's different than if you're heterosexual, because we you know, if we want to go to a sperm bank or if we want to get it from somebody that we know. We have to start talking about this now. We can't just when we actually want it to happen then all of us because the process is gonna be long.

Have you have you ever had this conversation with another woman that you were dating before?

No?

Okay, this congratulations, it's serious. It's freak you. Well, it's because I don't want to have a baby at forty Like that's that's cute for some folks that that's good for them, But I know that I'm already exhausted now, so I can't even imagine what forty is going to

Oh my god, you have the perfect solution for you and your baby. My brother's sun firm, so that your baby will be my baby.

Well no, the baby.

Will just my baby, your baby, everybody's baby.

It will be a sis, but aunt rees will actually be aunt rees.

Wow.

The only issue is that your brother looks so much like me. The baby's gonna look like me, Sis.

Yeah, No, The problem is that your brother is very attractive, great jeans, I'm so talented, but there's another part of him that I'm like, I don't want that rub my baby.

Yes, yes, yes, so I'm gonna need that to know I'm gonna okay, yes, but I would love I would actually love to have a baby that looks kind of like my jeans are quite strong, sis, we we all have, we all have.

I want my baby to have abs on its neck. I mean, listen, I was just throwing that out there. If you're listening.

It was a good I like that. I'll you know what, I'll ask. I'll ask the girl and see what she says. But she did have a couple of people were like, yeah, you could use you totally. You can have my spur. But also, I'm gonna need to borrow your body when I need a baby. And it was like, wait, what you just in't in a cup for two seconds is

Just throw it in the bag.

For paper end plastic, thank you.

You're gonna tie the body to the top of the car with some roath.

And so my girl was saying that she doesn't want to get sperm from a sperm bank because she was like, what is the logic between these dudes that are just giving up their sperm. Is it because they're a good Samaritan or because they need the money, or are they sick? Nasty freaks that just want their babies all out here and about like what.

I mean, it's a combination of they want they want babies all over the place, and they need money and they just had some time. Maybe they were waiting to meet somebody across the street and they were like, oh, I could just go donate some sperm.

Dollars? How much? How much do you get paid for donating sperm?

I know that like you get you get a lot of money for like getting vasectomy, Like you get thousands and thousands of dollars if you donate your your testicles.

Donate your text. What I thought of a secondmy was just snipping like.

A oh wait, wait whatever.

But if you actually get rid sorry sorry, if you actually get rid the nuts and there's just like just the dick and then it goes right to the butthole.

So you get money, if you get cash straight yourself.

Yeah, I mean, like, you know, if I'm ever in a hard place, fall back on that and I'm not using them.

If you give your balls up, can you ever be in a hard place again?

Oh?

I think that you can still you can still produce come. I feel like there's gonna be so many people look at that are like, no, you can't have so.

Many doctors who follow us on here.

So I think Scutiny is.

A doctor, actually scooty doctor scoot Yeah, yeah, I.

Think that you still, yes, okay, So so what suptions that friend is? You're you're going through your rolodex of rich, uh successful friends.

To find a donor or you know, I don't know if he's listening, he's probably not. But Dwayne Perkins, I would take his burm. I think he is gorgeous. He is. He is so beautiful and very successful and smart and all those things and when all of that rolls up great personality. Yeah, he can dance. He's so just charming. Ah you know what I might ask, But I would like him to be a little bit taller, just a little bit. But no, no, no, he's perfect, perfect, But I would like, you know, a taller baby.

Impossible stretch the legs when you have the baby, sister, you'll stretch the way that you stretch the baby's like hold it by the ankles and then you spin in a circle and then the baby will elongate naturally like.

And now this is why you are clearly not having kids.

Think I want to have them, which is why I suggested my brother's sperm so I could have you know, baby with you.

But okay, that's fine whatever, you know.

Anymore, we are soulmates, Marie. Do you think your brother would give give the sperm every day?

Sis?

Oh my god, that's the title. Will your brother giving me some sperm? Can I borrow a cup of juice? Okay, So you and this person we've decided who's going to carry this baby? The first one.

Me?

You? Oh, I can't even Yeah, just get it out the way. I mean, I think she's way more nurturing than me, so she can definitely do the hard work. And then if the first one goes good, I'm okay with having another one. But I think she wants to get pregnant as well, which is gonna be really tough because I'm not good at that. You are nurturing. You do take care of people. That is a whole l I ees.

That you just told on this podcast. You do take care of people. You do it every single day. And now you go to the grocery store, so like you also can go get some groceries for the person that is pregnant in your life.

That is Sis.

Progress get like dunkuse but but still.

Yes, Sidney, you can't drink red Bull. I don't think you can drink red Bull if you're pregnant, fyi, or when you're lactating. I'm pretty sure you can't drink red bull popping and then keeps the baby red bull titties.

So no, no, we have red Bull. I'm tired, go to bed. No, So I wanna Kelly Rowland is pregnant and she looks so cute. It's so pictures it's so she's like, Oh, that's what I want. You want to bet you want to when you're pregnant. I want to look like Kelly Rowland. I got come on, girl, She's so gorgeous. She she just makes pregnancy is a look, it's a look. How old is her first baby?

I think she's she Isn't he like old? Like he's like at least like seven, right, Oh?

I feel like he's got it. Maybe he's like four's seven.

I feel like she's he's five.

We were that's right in the middle.

She's she's thirty nine. Kalandria Rowland serving.

As Baudy Calendria. Okay, let me stink of the photos. Okay, we love to see it.

Oh, look at the bit the belly is she still kind of has abs a little beer.

I know, I love it like a tight pregnant belly.

Oh no, no shade to people who are you know, swell when they're pregnant. But I love, you know, because I'm I'm petite, so I like to see like people who are I would, I would say similar stature to me pregnant because it makes me feel like, oh.

Oh, I love it. It's great. I love and that that'll that'll be me. Hopefully.

Everybody's body is different this. Some people don't look pregnant for like the first six months and then like they wake up and their stomach is like gott gao, and it's like, well, sis you what happen the baby dropped?

You know.

Everybody's bodies are different and it's a boy or they say girls steal your beauty. So if you like your nose swells and your feet are swollen, they're like, you're having a girl. But if you still look cute and pregnant, they're like, you're having a boy. Like I don't know how truth how truthful that is, but that's what they like to say.

Sidney how would you do your gender reveal?

Don't do it.

I know I'm not here. I don't care. I just want to have a healthy, happy baby. That's all that matters. Will you let me plan both baby showers? Oh? Yeah, of course if you want. If that's something that you want to do, I I won't stop you, but I will feel like it will be low key thrown together.

Okay, wow wow, because you don't want to be on set of my several movies. And I'm gonna be like, yeah, yea ye, yeah, I would realize, says, I wouldn't probably not plan it for you. I would pay somebody to do it. I'd be like, I'm gifting you Jennifer Lopez from Monster in Law or whatever the hell that movie. I'm gifting Jennifer Lopez, and she's gonna plan your baby.

Shower marine I can. I mean, yeah, I think that would be I think that it could be fun.

I was looking at pictures recently of Tianna Taylor's baby shower and Karen Sivill and Carucci or whoever planned it, and.

You know, I just gotta get you some sponsorship, sins. That's it.

I gotta get somebody to sponsor the baby shower so we don't have to spend none of our money and then it.

Be that's it. I think that's smart, Marin, and I trust you in that, and I think you have enough friends who will pull it together and help you. But if you were like, hey, I need help, Like, yeah, I'm the planner of this, but I also we also need help.

But I feel like in two to three years, I'm an I'm gonna be in a better place than I am right now.

Yeah, You're just gonna pay somebody and I'll take that.

I'm a data man with lots of money and be like my friend is having a baby and they need this, this, this, this, this, here's the registry, get everything.

On the list. I love that for us. Can you believe we're talking about this ship? This is this disgusting cut cut cut cut cut, This is actually Andrew. We're gonna need you to take all this albaby take out. We're good. Are canceled? So yeah not.

I So what did you guys end up with? What are what are the top three things the most important things that you guys need to discuss or figure out about this baby thing?

Well, obviously, when we get married, I'm I I'll have to, Yeah, I have to be in LA because she just feels like, hey, this for everybody on the call house, it's terrible. Yeah, that's I think that's what I'm having an issue with. It's just like, my family is here, and my family is my friends, and I just want to have enough money if that's the case. If I'm moving to LA to be able to fly like you out or Amina out if I need to. Yeah, I mean, and we

But I also I find solace and find pride in knowing that we're only going to be more and more successful as time goes on, so we'll also be able to be like, Yep, I'm outside and you're gonna be like wait what And I wanted to see you or you sounded sad on the phone, so I came to LA. But I mean, you have to think about your future, friend, and if your future is with this person, and y'all are going to have a family, the cat's.

Gonna be in LA because.

The problem is that Boobay got a dog, and it's like you clearly weren't thinking about Jelly and Jam. I'm not one bit o.

Jelly and Jim are gonna go up for.

That.

You re retiring, would take need to take the cat? Will not take your cats. I'm not taking your cats. I would take a cat, but I'm not. In two years, they're gonna be seven eight they middle aged, since I want a young, sexy.

Cat, not an old middle age cat. You ages, Black Beach, You are you yourself middle age in two years?

I would say that's a lie?

Anyway? What is what is we crack ourselves up?

Why is it forty? Is it fifty? What age is? Middle age now feels like right now? It feels like where I'm at right now. Like middle age for me and my family is I'll be like sixty because I have people in my family who live to be one hundred and twelve years old.

So problem to you guys. Be lifting weights and freaking doing all the activities to be healthy to live that way. I'm not working out now.

So I actually got into it with my gym today because they've charged me now for the month of September and they're getting ready to charge me for October and they refuse to freeze my account, and I said, oh wow, so you are stealing money from me during a global pandemic, I will be contacting my bank.

Go on. So that's that's the conversation that I had to have with my bank this morning. I hope you get your money back for fifteen.

Dollars a month, so it's thirty dollars, but I want my thirty dollars back.

It's mine, you know. New development friend. So also last thing, the babe was like, I need you to mark off January twenty eighth to February seventh, and I was like what. She's like, yes, those you're going to be with me. And I was like, wait, my birthday is on the second though, and she's like, yeah, you're going to be with me. And I was like, but wait, I like

July hold on January what twenty eighth?

January January twentye to the seventh February?

Okay, so what's the what she got planned?

I don't know? She can you find out? Can you text me?

If I text her? What do you have planned? She's she's going to know that. I'm going to talk to you about it.

Just between well, will you find out and just promise not to tell me? But yeah, can you do that? You're like, well, how can I jump on this train? How can I wait? Oh, you have no idea what it is? No, she won't tell me. It's October's I know, platte. I'm gonna be sucking the sore. So I tell you that much. Tossing that fun into the gap, the gap. It's so sweet. But Marie find out because I was like, I want.

To do well, maybe we can well I mean, I don't know what her plan is, but maybe we can all do something.

You know, we can all scutiny? Is that okay? Babe? Can we all do something.

Signature?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Also, I mean scoot no all jokes aside. We appreciate you listening to the podcast and being soon.

Yeah, we really do.

I'm sorry, no, no, no, no, if you're if you're still listening, I am apologizing for coming off hard.

You came at me hard, and I'm gonna do what I need to do. Uh Sydney.

Actually, it's gonna be interesting to see what type of mama bear instincts you develop after you have a baby, because I feel like you're gonna be maybe meaner, more protective of those that are important to you because you're a mom. Well I'm already, but you're nice, but I think you might turn you know, I don't know. You know, when mom's babies are trapped under a car, they had like super strikeing like lift a car, you know what.

I mean, stuff like that.

So it will be it will be interesting to see what your personality develops into.

After you have a baby. I'm tired of growing up. I don't want to.

Baby.

I was like, I can't believe we're talking about this. Oh my god, Coco loco. All right, well this was so much fun. We really had something to talk about. Thank you for divulging your whole meet up with my encounter dusty denim, dead tooth, Yes, denims and dead too. I think that should be there.

Yeah.

So the first one was fall into the Gap, which I got a lot of applause. Can I borrow a cup of jiz please? That was there was dead tooth and denim, but there was. But what you rephrase it right now is dusty tooth, The dusty.

Dusty Denim and Dead Tooth, Dead Tooth. Okay, or follow Dusty Denim and Dead Tooth.

I like, can I borrow a couple?

You're giving me way too many options. Let's solidify one.

I think we got to take the couple of out only because I feel like a lot of our titles are very sexually explicit.

They they but that's why people.

That when they get well.

But I like, I like Dusty Denims, Dead Tooth.

Feel yeah, I like that.

Yeah, Okay, I love this.

I think that we had a very productive Zoom meeting today we did.

I feel really good about it. Actually the best episode we've done in uh the month of the last couple of months. Okay, I was gonna say the last couple of months. But we talked about everything. Yeah.

Anyway, shout out to doctor Scutiny, my physician, and I hope that I get my thirty dollars back from Blink Fitness this week.

You you're you'll be in our prayers. Argue with Sis Marie, and you know, don't forget to keep reviewing us, rating us, keep it going. We love that. If you got bad things to say, dm us, damn us, do just leave a good stuff on.

There, man, if you have best to say, I mean, I still want to hear what it is. I just don't want to read it on iTunes.

Yeah, just like our damn so we can block. So we can because you funny Andrew.

Is right, we were. We're not afraid of a negative review. We're gonna talk about it on here. So you know, if you're bored and you want to hear us talk about you on the pod and you feel I'm going to say this mean thing to them.

Then just as long as it's still five stars, because if it's a main review, that's one stars.

No, don't leave it.

Right because the review had nothing to do with the pod. You had to do with us leave in the country, truly didn't. That was a morality thing and that scooney. Did you have a good time listening? You did, So that's why you should give it. Scooney.

I need you to jump in the DM so we can see what you look like.

Scoot over to the day to the.

Anyway, Bye, guys, see you love you, Bye forever.

This has been a Forever Dog production. The Unofficial Expert is executive produced by Brett Boham, Joe ccilio, and Alex Ramsey, Senior Producer Tracy Soren, Produced by Andrew McGuire. Cover art by Sandy Hoenig. To listen to this podcast ad free, sign up for Forever Dog Plus at Forever Dog Podcasts dot com slash plus.

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