Bangs, Birthday, BOUNDARIES w/ Hunter Harris and Peyton Dix

You're listening to the mess.

Okay, girly, we're back.

Hey girl, you know what, I'm actually feeling so good. I'm back on meds.

Is.

I've been on it for like twenty minutes and it's worked. It's absolutely I'm glowing.

Is that it happens now? It takes like two weeks, three weeks, okay, six months? This is a lie. Yeah, it's a placebo effect. Right now. How about you? You're feeling good? Should I get some drug? No, you don't need it. You got you got like rooms and edibles and God and God.

Yeah, you pray, write that down. I just pray it just a little bit. I feel like you secretly pray. I don't feel like you're the ones on your knees, but you're definitely saying no, I'm not on my knees and I'm not like a prey before I eat type of person.

No.

But like if I'm trying to catch a flight, I'll pray if I especially now you know, planes falling out the sky, and if i'm taking it, like if I'm at the doctor and.

I'm waiting for my results, I'll perate.

So God is like, Marie, you're so unseerious when you're praying to me it's nothing, it's nothing. I'd be like, hey, girls, so I know we haven't talked. You know my heart? Yeah, you know my heart. That's also a good title, girl. But uh yeah yeah, yeah, so you're feeling good.

I love that. Yes, a little bit of mess.

So I've talked about this before, like we I think we put this on the page, but like you know, doing pop ups during Valentine's Day, my my gal did that to me.

She popped up at a show.

I mean, we talked about her coming, but she we didn't solidify.

She didn't confirm. She didn't confirm.

So if you don't confirm, hey, we need confirmation in twenty twenty five, it's a yes or so no it's happening or it's not. It's not a oh maybe no, no no. So, because the tickets were expensive, I thought she wasn't coming. Then all of a sudden, I didn't paid all this money for these flowers. She's not even home.

She's not even home. Mess.

She came, You delivered the flowers to her, and she wasn't there a get them yeah exactly.

So what they do They just leave them on the stoop.

Well, luckily, you know, they so unprofessional they didn't deliver them until two days later. I said, what if I was what if I had fucked up and I needed these flowers to be there on that day?

You were to ruin my relationship. This is a this is a black owned blitz. No, it was.

It was avas flowers could be three stars.

The flowers were nice, but they were late as a late girly. I'm a letter rocks.

No. Vali's Days the busiest time of year for flower people, and whatever funeral season is, I don't know that is right. Valentine's Day is the busiest season for them. They should have been prepared for that. Three stars.

I won't lie. I did order it the ten am that day that day. Yeah, might be messed. I might be messed.

It's not about the time. It's the thought that matters. Okay, you thought about it too late? But what about your mess?

What is my mess? Wow?

I do this every week every week. I'm like, should I written something down? I guess my mess today? Is I got my hair done recently?

Right? Yes? And I mean you can't relate to it's it's not really given. Whatever we're gonna fix it in post.

But I got my hair done, and before I got this style done, I was going to do something like that. And I made an appointment with the lady and everything, and.

She canceled my appointment as they do day as they do. My appointment was at noon. She canceled it at twelve oh five.

It be your own people, as so what'd you do?

I had to pivot.

I had to do something else. I was sitting in the chair getting my braids taken out. I had to get some braids out so I can go to this appointment. So I was runing late to the appointment anyway, Okay, but I was. But I had been trying to call her and cancel and postpone, like from the day before. She never picked up, She didn't respond to no email,

Thirty in stead of twelve. She said, hey, are you coming to your appointment?

I was like, oh, I just wanted you to know that I'm running lake And we push back to like twelve thirty or one. She was like, no, and your deposit is non refundable, and then she hung up the phone.

I said, find you.

I had like three bohole braids left to take out and I'm sitting there like, so what am I going to do? So it do be your own people, And she did keep my deposit and I will be posting about this later because she deserved to get dragged drag.

But also, you know, it's mess hair. Hair in general.

The whole system, the industry is messed up, and they don't understand how stressed that we are and how we be on camera and then they be in the comments like look.

At that wag lifted.

It's like, hey, babe, we all have to work together to make sure black hair community. You know, it takes a village to raise a lace front. And I need them to be on I need them to be on time.

I need them to care more than me.

I need them to be on time. I need them to be off book because a lot of the girls are hair and makeup people, but they can only do a certain type of person hair and makeup. And it's like, can you call yourself a professional if you can only do straight like one beat like you know what I'm saying.

Not one beat? What's the white people hair?

Two?

I don't know. I don't know. Becca, if I'm a force? She like a three? What are you? Maybe our guests will know.

Maybe our guest will know what I don't know.

They definitely don't. I am so excited for our guests.

Giannas in here today, just glowing, just youthful, all their teeth.

It's crazy, Okay.

Saying all their teeth implies that I don't have all No, no.

Let me talk. No, no, Marie.

If the shoe don't fit, honey, I'm not talking about Yeah, that's not my signe.

I'm missing her too, I'm talking about me. Damn, my bad fort stepping on the intro. It's okay.

Anyway, we have Hunter and Peyton from let me say this today at least, So what do you think of our mess this week?

Any thoughts? Hair is a good one? Oh my god?

Like the DM for appointments, like the dms, the no dms. That is like anxiety inducing for me.

First of all.

I mean especially if it's a place that you've never been before. But like you, you know what I'm saying, Like if your friend has gone and you go because you're like, oh, who did this?

And then now you know. But if it's a place you've never been, but you.

You watch some tiktoks, yeah, or you've seen some reels and you're like, oh, okay with it.

Yeah, it's different.

Before you came in. Actually, we were talking about gatekeeping our braiders.

Now you have to. You have to absolutely because why.

Can I not get an appointment when I put you on? And it makes sense.

We put her on and she won't do anything for us.

She won't do anything except for my hair, which I pay for, Okay, Like I can get parity booking.

I can't shay anything extra for putting you on. Well that's in the thing is just like you want her to get more money. I want.

I want this future for usis but because you don't do right by me, and now I gotta take it away.

Now I gotta take this way.

That's how I feel about, like like getting my hair done and people be like see my page and be like, oh, make sure you tag me, and it's like, but you didn't look me up this I'm paying full price and I tip.

And I did and I was only five minutes late. Like I'm not even like that late.

It's just well, the grace policy needs to be also like on both ends. Because I went to get my hair done and I was ten minutes late or no, I was eleven minutes late, and the cutoff of ten, well exactly if before the cutuf should be fifteen fifteen is regular, but then like when it flips and they're late to starting my hair, I don't get a discount.

Man, And let's just say fifteen. Ya know, we're gonna be late to fifteen, but give me fifteen.

Then I'll take eleven. And were like, all know I'm lying about eleven. I didn't want to be like.

I also wanted to ask you, are you a god fearing woman?

Am I god? Woman of God?

Woman?

Like I said on paper on paper, I'm a god fearing woman?

Yes, okay, like well, or or let's.

Say this, I was raised, I was raised by God like and but then obviously I ventured off did some devilish thing.

But now I'm because.

When you say delis me eat, I'm still.

De Yeah, well, but I do I have a relationship with God. Okay, okay, are.

You if you say you're atheist, I'm shutting no black parents. I don't, but you feel like my relationship with the Lord shifted. But I thought there always had to be like in one friendship, there needs to be one real god fearing.

Especially in the black friendship, and then one kind of like there's something higher up there.

You know, like like.

And they're like like unders someone who's up in the church and someone who grew up reading horoscopes like the newspaper, and like that's yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's which one is? Which one of you? Oklahoma a good hearing woman. Yeah.

So like a little church in black and white, that's what you went, like the kill Bill Church.

Uh No, more like like like like a black mega Churchla mega church. Yes, Bishop Harrison.

R I P. He's done now. Coulson, Carlton Pearson Carton.

Is a good pastor, but he's what's the difference between a bishop and a pastor?

More money? Guess what bishops? I own this whole building. Yeah. So I was like, I'm clocking in visit. It's not official. Yeah, I'm a guest are Yeah.

So there were like lots of big churches, like black churches and Tulsa for I'm from. And so that was But then of course, like I don't know, I had to go to church all the time. Yeah, like I had to go eat pizza and like after after church care like children's church.

Yes, we did not get pizza. We got in a fish sandwiches. Oh lord, okay, wondering.

Strayed from the world.

Yeah, this is my gospel. They're also l I love it. Are y'all here for pop ups? Somebody? You know some surprise. I thought you meant pop ups like shopping pop ups us.

I'm talking about popping up, like someone popped up on you, Like.

Oh, I hate that. I hate running into people too. Oh you do?

Yeah, Oh that's crazy. We ran into you a couple of weeks ago and you acted like you were Yeah, you were like, hey, I love you. When somebody is obvious that, it's like, oh, what are you doing?

I feel like your nightmare scenarios like being on a train multip stops away and someone sees you and comes up to you and it's.

Like, oh my god, happened to me.

That happening from Blood High School with I could not remember her name. She's so nice, but it was just like, what's her name, Mary Francis?

Okay, that's her name that's an Oklahoma PERSONA yeah, okay, but it was just so like, is that.

Like I'm stealing that?

Yeah.

I'm not good with faces or names, so I'll see.

People neither, right, So I see people and I'd be like do I know this person? But you know, people will come up to me and be like and I don't know if they know me or if they know me, so I just be like, good.

To see you.

I love.

Leg. But if you think about it, it's like, well, I'm a public figure, You're supposed to know me.

I don't. What do you do your childhood best friend? They're like bitch, and I'm like, how's your mom doing?

I did bump into somebody once that I I was like, oh, I recognize this person. And we were both turning the corner at the same time, so we crashed into each other and I was like, oh hi, and he was like hey, and I was like trying to figure out where I know him from, and I was like maybe I know his mom, And I did ask how's your mama doing?

And then we parted. He was like she's good, blah blah blah. We parted ways.

Turns out it was an actor I did not know him. Somebody I recognized from a movie that I had seen. It was Lina He at Least Housewive.

He's in the center of Bailey's husband husband.

Right, But that's what it was because I was like, wait, he did everywhere and it was literally I recognized him from David Ruffin.

And he said, he.

Everything with you. I was like, it's good. So he's just like us. Real.

I love that he's like, like much older than us. You're like, how's your mom? He's like, you.

Don't crack up? Yeah, so you know, look at this thirty year old man I'm talking to. This was a couple of years ago.

But yeah, so sometimes you just gotta fake it, but don't show up to where I'm at.

But not if you're performing.

That would make me really nervous if like someone just shows up and I'm.

Like, oh, But technically it was like we had talked about it, so it wasn't It wasn't like me, it's not how I'm presenting it.

It's just I'm trying to be more dramatic about it.

But and for me, I had already I was like, I'm gonna be in my bed, I'm gonna be scrolling or I'm gonna be closing like but so now you know she was coming and I was like, oh wait, now I gotta be like alive and so, but I think surprises are good, but then it's.

Like, do you really want a surprise? It is romantic though, I think it's like, hey, I'm in theory.

Yeah, but I like surprises that I curated myself totally. So it's not right, please the right attitude of this reframe.

Yeah, okay, so y'all came in here with y'all, y'all good old mess, which is birthdays, birthdays, birthdays, boundaries and bangs.

I like that there's three bees whose birthday is the closest. Who mine is on the September Sydney.

Just passed, Oh, I guess mine because mine's in April April.

And what's your birthday? August? Oh? What's that? August ninth? Birthdays, Whitney, Easton, London. I feel like that would be in a bio somewhere.

Yeah, it should be.

Wait, what are you two?

Sign wise?

Libro right aquarious? You kind of said that was shame.

You're at love because sometimes she accidentally called herself a pisces. There was one time, honey, I am I stamped wrong capital a aquarius?

Any famous people born on your birthday? I don't care about them.

It's all about what wait, what are aquarius traits?

We're I would I would say that we are stars chill about it, like we're not like in your face.

Star crazy, but so crazy at the same time. It's like very like you see what you Yeah, that's why I thought she was a most sensitive friend. I am. Oh that was one time, Marie. One time Sidney.

Sydney's tears are like interesting because she'll start crying and then she'll be laughing and then the tears are sucked back in and it's like.

Did that happen? Call mental illness? But also you sham wow tears? Is that y'all? Do that? I feel like one of y'all. I feel you, like you're the one that would be like, wait are you crying? Oh?

No, I like be weeping religiously really and I'm one of those annoying but just it's like, because I'm gonna beutiful crier. I look.

So many photos of your cry that she sent me that she hasn't me cry in a public place or at home wherever.

You want me to cry, You'll cry the streets in New York and then you'll take a picture, and then you'll share the photo.

Close friends, if you will one and the one that she has specifically is from Kylie Jenner's baby announcement.

But how you're like this and you're like, bal yeah, what a time? Can you please send us the photo? So you're gonna need that, You're going to need going in.

That's why I'm sensitive as fuck. Unfortunately, I'm sensitive as hell.

You're a tourist. Yeah, grip.

Suburbs you you don't know what senses you, but it's.

Lonely at the top of being correct.

Your head loud.

Yeah, and you're Emilio no no, no, I mean like you're are you emotional or you the opposite of her?

I think I've grown a lot.

You're learning to be You're learning to open up.

I used to be very like that thirty Rock gift of like petting someone with a broom when they're crying.

Now I'm like you, they were like alternate if you put your hand up, Okay, what're this?

Literally I was crying not even a week ago on a walk with Hunter, and she went like it was kind of like a slat more than it was a pat no rub, it was just kind.

Of she was she was trying to knock the tears out of your body.

And I understand that. Wait, do you cry on your birthday?

Your universe cry once a year every year, and it would be on my birthday.

But now I don't know, not as not as much. I think you have to cry on your birthday.

Yeah, it's one legal time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I used to be so surprised when I cried on my birthday, Like why am I so sad? And it's like because you feel like no one cares about you until everyone is around and you're like, oh my god, wait, I love birthdays.

Why is it the long day in the world? Like your birthdays?

Like, oh, everyone fucking hates no matter how many Facebook messages I or how many likes on a post.

Literally you don't mean it.

Even when it's like someone text me at like eleven am. I'm like, oh my god, it's my birthday for eleven hours and you had no fucking you didn't care at all, like.

You realize it's my birthday.

Truly, It's like, oh my god, I would just feel sad about like getting older and being around people who I feel like are twelve.

And on the Forbes twelve under twelve. You know what I'm saying, like.

The twelve under twelve to come into blood.

It's happening. Please don't do that. I already feel bad on my birthday. We don't need that. But not no more.

I mean, last time you cried on your birthday was in Tulum, but you was you were you were much room the time you were like crying for really you know, it was like it was like happy, Like, Wow, I'm standing in the ocean, the Gulf of America, the Gulf of Mexico, and yeah, I was like my mom stood in these same waters, my grandma stood in these waters.

Tears, that's really sweet.

Oh you start crying in Tulum? My god, that sounds so much cheaper than crying and like that's a Starbucks.

Yeah yeah, oh, fully we lived different lives. So why are birthdays so messy? Is it the planning of stuff for people? Is it like personal mess? Is it because you're trying to I don't know. I don't like planning things for groups of people because I don't want to. I don't want to be worried about people having a good time. I just want people to have a good time or else or else.

Yeah.

I do this thing with birthdays where like I never I'm like, oh I don't care. Oh, like who cares? I don't need to do anything. I don't want to dinner like don't. And then and then August eighth, I'm like, what the fuck is happening? Like we better do something big for my birthday? And that, like Cat's Cradle of Expectation versus Reality is like just awful every single year. But then I also have a really unique scale of making other people's birthdays messy.

Oh you showing up hotter than the birthday?

Yea?

What he was doing? Yeh? I thought we were starting at nine o six, like you have a spotlight on your turn and it's like, oh, totally no.

Well you were mad because I went to your birthday party last year.

Yeah, wearing a.

Just a simple white tea, a white tea that said LEO on it on my very hard headed ass Taurus birthday and I said, pack your bag.

No, you're remember.

Because Hunter got wasted blackout and lost her expensive coat. And I said, that's why you need to wear But.

To the top cover up.

Wait you got you got blackout drunk at her birthday?

It was that was the thing.

Let me say it was.

It was the worst day of my life. Yeah, okay, but it's also like I can't remember what happened that day to make me like so crazy.

No, no, no, I know, like before that.

She was black out day, I got black out.

And so I go to Peyton's birthday. I'm like, oh, what are we gonna wear?

Okay, cute this like top and skirt, and then I lost a coat that costs I'll say four figures. It was what it was like, and I'm ashamed to say it, but I need to own it because it's I need to shave myself into like skirt stream you bought that coat? Yeah, it was my birthday. Gret for myself that I got was like.

Most early what kind of coat is it? It doesn't matter, Yeah it does.

We were.

Maybe would be like maybe they were it.

Do you want a It was the tame scarf jacket and it has like it's like yeah attached.

I'm sorry that so yeah.

So I lost the coat at the first location at the bar, and then I we went to a different bar, and I thought I lost it there, but I didn't. And then I went back to my apartment again Blackout had to walk my dog. Didn't know how that happened. I woke up sleep on my sofa. Dog out, she's always sleeps in her crate.

I was like, what the heck?

And then I had to go get blood drawn, and then I had to go to the gym. When I had to go get my eyelashes done, and I had to go to but my tape a podcast in a basement.

Why were you in blood drawn? That's the thing for me that I'm like.

It was like I had the appointment set and I just I don't know it, like in my in my just trauma brain, I was like, oh, I have to keep the appointment.

I can't leave. And then I also didn't want to cancel the workout so my trainer would know that. I was like so messy. She knew I wanted to cover up the masks. You didn't think he was gonna look at you and be like, I know what happened?

No, And she didn't. She was like, oh, weird, what happened your arm? I was like, oh, I just got blood drawn yesterday.

So was it the blood drawn.

The blood drawn thing feel like because you had a blood alcohol content of blackout. Then you went to the gym with the big gass band aid righty, And.

Then how did I pass out? Died?

Because I'm a god ring woman, He's got me. And then the story is so messy. And then in the middle getting blood drawn, the nurse took a smoke break.

Okay, well, love that for her.

So you were in Brooklyn. Was there a balcony off the road? She fully was like she fully? I was like, where's she going? She was like, bye? It was crazy. It was the craziest day.

So you you cried at her birthday? Or no, you got blackout drunk?

Yeah? Okay, yeah, you love close. I cried the next day. I cried.

You know what would have been like eight hours later? Did you get black out drunk at that birthday?

Yeah? It was my birthday?

Okay?

And her right, yeah, thanks, she deserves us.

So what messy things are happening on your birthday? Was I that?

Yeah?

No?

Well my birthday it felt like was actually fine.

It was thirty. So it was like, I don't like why you said it?

Well, like that that felt aggressive, It felt like well, you know, it's like like young, it wasn't a big deal, like just another day thirty.

Like it felt very it felt very I was targeted. Yeah, it was actually in sensitive. I should have whispered. That's what I.

Just made it. It was like, what could go wrong? It's thirty, Like it's so I'm gonna get wasted. And then I like went upstate with my friends the next like a couple of days and played games.

How wholesome. Oh I forgot about that detail that I had a flight the next day too.

Oh you had to go. Yeah, half of that stuff.

I can't remember what because I remember I was texting the bar owner from my flight.

I think you had a wedding? Do I have a wedding?

I always texting the bar owner somebody you knew.

No black coat. He's like, what is it?

Like?

I was like, it has a scarf attached. He's like, no, damn, what's the last time you lost the coat?

I feel like the last time I lost the coat was like I don't even remember.

I'm not a club no coat.

Yeah, I want a coat so good that I'm wearing it because it's an outfit. I don't want to even put it down like I want to have it on. Yeah, I don't want to lose it.

You know what I lose often, it's being of being black. Is my my phone? My cellular device? You lose your phone, which is ironic considering when I'm drinking heavily. I made back of the uber kind of.

That's what you lose it sticking photo.

So I really that's what I'm saying, So it's surprising that it leaves my hand. I'mo point five BackFlash always. I stay strapped.

Yeah, wait, you you use let me do it now?

Yeah, I don't. How do you do that?

Oh my god, it's awesome you it's I the youth taught me. I used to be a hater of it, and now I'm a lover. You go like a back cameras if I'm taking phot of you, point five zoom's out and you got to hit like a nice forty five degree angle, a little up, yeah, and then you click like this upside right here.

Yeah.

And when it's night, like when you're out, you should do it with a flash and it'll looks so cumty and you look so snatched.

That's what I'm not trying to talk to people yea age just not Eve gonna know your off guard.

Now he's stressed.

Yeah, I'm trying to take a photo.

Why are you doing this right? I was just giving back. I was giving giving back, giving back and giving back.

I'm paying it forward. Okay, I learned.

I am now a back camera, point five flash beach to the more.

You know, we'll all do it and then we'll put it in a in the dumps for us.

Okay.

Think the most important question how many people? Is too many people at a birthday dinner?

What a great dinner. I'm telling you we'll do. That's we'll do is putting the check because that was a second and we need it and we need to end it right there, like no more.

I think, like a solid I want to say eight, but I'm gonna say six. Six is too I think, no, I think six is the exact number. Like I think it needs to be intimate. Birthday just need to be intimate. I think once it's going to table one, that's on you now. Actually, if you're booking like crazy, like a big backyard or a moment, you're paying for.

That actually, right because now you start yeah yeah versus a dinner.

And I think like the whole point of a birthday dinner is like intimacy. Yes, after that, it's too much and there's always something for.

The girl because I feel like they don't know, they don't know. Eight is good.

I think eight or nine. It depends on trying to do the math of like yes, but then no plus ones. That's the really big thing.

You just one on a birthday dinner straight couples. That sounds like I'm not gonna.

Say friends, so and so people.

Are always like, hey, can I bring someone, and it's like, no, it's a dinner.

It's a dinner.

Also yeah, because who doesn't unless it's a clurb like and also you obviously need the plus ones to fill this place blackment but.

Yeah, if we're we're all seated.

No, no, no, But then the sputing the check thing is so weird. I've been to dinners where it's like you know, someone, girls like oh I just had this one salad and it's like no, you didn't, Like I need to be like, no, you didn't.

I saw how many bites you took of everything you need.

You tasted everything that means you pay in fairly thing, Yeah, but not you clocking them like I see everything you got.

What's going on? You the octopus earlier? So could I agree?

I think like you can't.

You're either all in or you have to be full. And then everyone also has to pay for the birthday person's meal. Yeah, not be controversial.

Oh no no no, no no no no.

Pay for the that's not controversial. Okay, pay for that.

I'm saying.

If I'm watching you order steak and I'm eating, you know I got.

The little I got the chicken, I got the roasted chicken or whatever.

The roast chicken can be crazy though.

Okay, let's make it something small. Let's maybe I didn't get that. Maybe I got the chicken salad. You can sell it.

Why are you gonna chicken sell it on my birthday? Listen, we going a big a go home. What are you doing? But I'm saying that there are there is an imbalance.

Sometimes it is nobody that they doing a lot, they doing a surfing turf.

Yeah, and you're like, oh, well, I'm gonna just do this, and we need to decide going in because everyone's on the same level.

Everyone's like, okay, yeah, we're gonna like eat a lot of food, good food.

No one's going to be like okay, like doing the math in their head out there, like you know, no one meeting me.

We a la carte is mess prefixed only, like so we all know we're all spending the same amount of money. And if you want to get drinks or extra like we buying a bottle, we're doing bottles. Like if no, none of that, you get this and you get that, and we'll share shared plates.

No, when if it's more than four people share plates? Do you hate me? I don't want to do that.

I don't want to share a plate.

I don't plate.

Let's get up, let's get two chickens, let's get the fish for the table.

I'm not mad a style, yes, but I also like, then, don't invite a bitch with a complicated fucking diet. Leave her at home.

I'm an only child. I I you don't want to share.

I'm like, yeah, so what you eating?

That's a birthday dinner? Yeah, tell us you're tell us your order. I don't know what I'm eating, meaning like a pasta that I'm like, okay, that's why we're se about you to No.

No, I think I'm anti dinners for birthdays. I think if you want to take somebody else to dinner one on one, next grade. But I like an activity. I think like like somebody renting down a room. We're playing games, karaoke. People come when they can, like they go in and.

Out that like real strict we're doing.

It's at this point, I've done it so many times it's actually boring. Now, it's actually boring to be with ten to fifteen people out a dinner.

I can't even speak to you. I don't want I actually want to.

I don't want to talk to your mouth as full, like we're not having a good time.

So I'd rather that being said. I will accept a sponsored dinner. Yeah, come on call. Actually that was my birthday, September twenty third.

Yeah, you got a couple of seasons to get in to get so many and Sydney will be there, Yeah, she complained, she'll be cross their dinner is cute because then we all know, like we're gonna be taking pictures tagging him, and we not thinking about no check, you're putting the check, you're getting a check. You know.

Actually we help them with the check, so you should buy us. So actually, actually it's a business dinner.

Yeah, yeah, we did go to a Michael's birthday Oh yeah, a segregated birthday birthday dinner.

Yeah, all the black people actually got there early. It sounds Jack and Jill is these Jack and Jill black one Jack and Jail.

No, so yeah, every black person was at one table, every white person's at another table.

And will you tell the black people two hours before it actually started.

No, but we just all happened to be there on time for once. It was crazy.

Yeah, well one of okay, this is this is birthday Michael's birthday related. I think the year after I was like,

I was gonna say, so you didn't vemo request people, I'm not that dinner.

I got a VEMO request. Yeah, because she's good for it. You see that person there, she's good for it.

Okay, I don't know the little a little Motley crew before on that birthday, ma, I don't memo clearer.

Wait, do I need to put my card down for a birthday? If you want the points, you really should. Yeah, Oh that's if you don't have a memory of old fish, you should. It's not really about the love.

Six months later, as wild, you are in your house washing dishes or watering your plants, and then you went literally raging like reverse and you were like.

You went in your phone and found the thirst sea and I.

Was like, and I just told myself it was a thankfully under six people. It was a small enough dinner that I was like, this is my gift to Michael.

So it was like four hundred dollars four one hundred dollars. No, we do a lot of pocket watching on this.

You were talking, I know she got you ten ninety nine for the podcast, and You're.

Like going through her under the bus and I was like, no, she's got money.

You said she's good for it, and you pointed to her, Pa, it's a spiser.

Man, you really I'm tired of it.

This has been for a while I never knew the price of that coach, so that that was the first time you heard it her first. That's an excluse.

Another important question, has there been a birthday where there's a big ass fallout. I had a birthday. We were all drinking and having a good time. My sister got there late. I think it was my twenty first birthday. My sister got it so just a couple of years ago. My sister got there late with her friend from college, and she saw all the drinks on the table and she just, I want to catch up to you guys, just started drinking.

Of course, my.

Sister threw up at the place, I want to say, she threw up on the table like something messy, and they, you know, Jesse jefted her out of the venue.

Now everyone that had been drunk and.

Was feeling good is sober, and we put her in a car to go all the way back to school, and her friend paid for it. And then my sister had to like venmo her in the morning and she was like, it was so expensive.

Why would you put me in a cat? We put her in a yellow cab. We put her Well, you deserve you got to think about.

What you did, truly, yes, And when you're paying it off, you don't think about how you just like you don't. That's not how people drink as adults, but you know, when you're seventeen eighteen or her old, she was, that's how you do it.

But did y'all have a falla? We didn't want to talk to her after that. She saw your sister. No, she's dead to me.

Legally speaking.

Yeah, I'm obigaty to say yes no. But yeah, I just don't know what to somebody's birthday and like do more than what they did.

Yeah, I don't think I've had any falling outs from birthday. I've just had like met when I went to Vegas for my birthday when.

My bock that's insane Vegas Usher, when Usher was a couple of so yeah I twenty twenty one. Yeah yeah, that was twenty twenty two, I think recent. Yeah, yeah, so that's good. Okay, that is a birthday, that's great. Yeah.

My friend got like so belligerently drunk. I mean it was Vegas with Usher, you got there's no, not that night the next night when SO and I just was like, we don't try to get somewhere. You're a fishing a team.

You are, I can stand you.

It was my birthday and I was desperately trying to get to the strip club, and they wanted to take me all these like heterosexual clubs, and I just wanted to see some todays. And I was like yelling that no one wanted to like adhere to my planet.

They were saying heterosexual club.

That was something like, no, no, no, I want to go to the strip club. They want to go to a regular club, like just like a string dance club. Yeah, and I got the tips. Don't worry, I've found my way. Oh yeah, oh no.

You look like the type this You're gonna get what you well.

I'm a feminist in the stripper yeah, oh god, I'm like, what do you need? Daddy Warbucks on me the way Michael's Birthday dinner. Constantly in the strip club. My bount hate to see me coming.

Oh I love it. This is exciting. Don't go to the strip club being.

Cheap, no, no, never, at least be throwing somebody else's money if you can.

Never right. Yeah, but I.

Remember going to the strip club with uh, with another comedian and other comedians. But he was like, I'm taking y'all, and then he gave us all money. And then one of the comedians was just being like.

One another here another there.

I said, you broke if you don't give these strippers that money?

Are you grazy? Rent? You're so insane disgusting. I was like, you should be embarrassed, and then I was I smacked it.

Now it's all on the floor. Now what you're gonna do? You don't do that in the strip club. That's insane, you know what I haven't I have an issue with like, like because I I am older than y'all girls, but I used to like plan birthdays and then there comes a point where you're exhausted you don't want to plan.

On more birthdays. That's where I'm at.

I'm like, I honestly have been like even though we've been friends for a long time, it's like I had a whole nother life where it was like every birthday was like we're going out, I'm getting stuff for free, We're going to the club. Y'all don't have to pay club another. Yes, we've seen the Barbie story. Yeah, and so now it's like now it's about people have to have effort, because if you plan everything, you do it,

Were just coming through.

Yeah.

My friend right now was planning a birthday trip for her thirdayth birthday, and like her level of organization, I'm like, oh my god, you should just like for a living Like She's so like, do you want to go to yach day? Do we want to do horseback ridding? All of this stuff?

And I'm like, I don't want to do that. I don't. I could not plan all of that.

It's like, no, I would plan a wedding if I had that stand wanna girl, I thought.

I want wedding planner. I could see it. Maybe it's a friend tip. Maybe it.

Looks like and like the Rosie blush, Yeah planner and things are color coated with you.

You have the sticker tabs. Yeah. Yeah, that trucks.

But I do you mean what like the effort to plan a birthday is really a lot, and we should get another day for ourselves actually.

So you have your actual birthday and then another day where it's your shoe.

Yeah, just for planning, someone else's birthday, you get like an extra day.

I just I feel like birthday trips. I mean, I'm good for birthday trips. We just went to Morocco for my birthday and it was so cute.

Who I did fall off a camel on my birthday.

We did to Loom for my birthday when like during the pandemic, when everybody was like.

Don't leave the country, don't leave your house, you left.

We were like, I was like, it was like all the influencers that I follow are in to Loom.

Should we go to tou Loom?

And everyone in the group that was like yes, And then Sidney was like, let's not post and I was like, girl, they know I'm not home.

It's sunny here and right, but uh, we're gone to Miami. We were summer for your birthday. Yeah to Brazil.

Yeah, come to Brazil.

Yeah yeah. I Mean. The thing is is that when you go on a trip, it's.

Like like this is how we normally go, and we just like we're gonna figure it out.

There's like one or two things we know we want to do, you know, we just kind of leave it loose. Yeah.

But the last trip we took together, we were with somebody who like planned it all out, like down to the hour, and it was like yes, well a libra libravirgo cusp. And we were like we were tired from doing the stuff, you know what I mean. And it's like some people that's just how they plan trips.

Yeah, but I like going on trips to people who plan downtime, who like schedule and like, okay, we like at least an afternoon for people like reset and.

Here before we go out here yeah, with messes not having an app. I so you're saying we've been up since eight am, and you think I'm go.

Go go, go, go, go, go go go. This is not Top Model. I'm not doing a challenge.

If I don't close my eyes for at least forty five minutes, I'll smack all you hose like.

Somebody gonna die tonight. I need like an hour to be like non purple in my back, Like, oh my god, you're going through pick let me scroll right?

Yeah?

Please hold. You have been friends since twenty twelve.

Yeah we met in college.

Yeah.

Oh y'all got some time on you. Yeah yeah that's meters and rugs and you're doing a podcast together. Yeah, and you'll be hanging out just regular normal sometimes christ Sydney.

Everything you're saying about them is Usay again, we get friends for about the same amount of time. We have a podcast together and we hang out. We've done carryo together before.

We carry before. Yeah, you know, you know, do you have boundaries? Because everything is on me. We have boundaries.

I don't think we've had to like U start like, I think we know each other well enough to know when Hunter needs to go non verbal. Even when we're hanging out with the group, I'm like, okay, so I'm gonna tap in because Hunter goes mm.

Waiting for her food.

I'm like, okay. That's like we have friends that we love in the door, but like are like very over stimulating and like I know Hunters fuses shorter for that sometimes, so I'll clock in and then I'll clock out and she'll clock Yeah. With each other, we like know where it's like I'm gonna need a loon time or I'm gonna like I need to just to parallel play.

I love parallel It's like a dog together.

Yeah, It's like we're just kind of like sitting at each other, but we don't have to be interacting.

Yeah, I love that, love that friendship. I'm gonna use that later. I'm gonna be like, so, now, are y'all the type of people that will hang out and then when you get home FaceTime to debrief about what happened, just happened or are you You get home and it's like, I'll talk to you tomorrow.

We usually after meetings with a lot yeah, like did you hear this? You be on the zoom liked.

No, No, Like I like you my because like all the text me and are literally like hunting a meeting being totally but.

Also I'm so embarrassed, like people hearing like nails and it's.

About D and D and then my notifications will be on on my laptop. Yes, yeah, and you're like the laptop is the op for sure. There was one meeting where I was in with another friend and the guy started talking.

And I immediately picked up my phone.

But you, I thought you couldn't see me, but she texted me she said, girl, we can see you.

Because I was texting like, well, why this is so hot? Because you got it. I was in an iPad.

I was an iPad, so the framing was weird, so I thought I was out of frame and he was like this.

Having me on a corporate call, except I was in a bra I'm like, thankfully had a sweater kind of draped over my shoulders, and my like coworker friend text me being like, your tits are out, and I was like, for sure, I.

Would have been like you said it to.

Me, yeah, And then you wanted to talk about hair.

Hair is mess because we haven't.

We started with hair right bangs, specifically.

I didn't cut my bangs, and my friend, who is a drag queen and also just like the countiest person I've ever met, was like, oh, you could have just got a wig, and I was.

Like, oh wait, Like no wait, but these bangs are in because you got the straight to the side.

They're really greasy right now. That's why we're under we're incognito mode at the moment. But like, I know, the haircut was highly praised and should be. It looks phenomenally accentually my cheekbones. Thay god. But I did think right after, oh, what about when it's curly, because.

Like, oh, yeah you do, yeah you do. Yeah, it might feel a little you gotta lose, Like, yeah.

It's gonna look really, it's not gonna hit out my cheekbones. It's gonna hit like out my eyes.

To be curls, though they'll still be long, he said to me. See, she know she knows what the texture is to be curls. But also she got because you like, we're gonna make it work, You're you're happened.

Yeah, yeah, I would have thought about that beforehand, but I think it looks good.

Yeah.

I just like to live, so I but taking risk is important for hair because like.

I have gonna grow bad.

Yeah, I have bangs for about ten twelve years.

It was insane. I would not let up.

And then I'm back Marie and she was like, yeah, you stay in a bang in the gold eyeshadow.

Tell you. She was like you, girl, you can't used.

To stay with a thick, a nice, a nice like Brazilian bang. But and I was like, girl what She was like, I hate my forehead it's so big. And I was like, you hate it because you don't see it right if you first see it. If you're always with a bang, you're used to your face being this big. But if you just let it, if you put breathe a little bit, you'll get used to your forehead and you did and then you didn't.

I said, is trying to set me up? I love a bang?

And oh you know when she said that I love a bang, you touched my bangs immediate?

Is there a problem?

And then like because the thing about bangs is it's a whole lifestyle. It's like you got you got tom closed that matched the bangs, that match the mood. Like you're not just popping on anything, like you're wearing a bang and a hot ink like lipstick.

Unless it's a cost, you know.

So I feel like if you do bangs, it's either oh you're going through something more it's.

A full like suspassion.

Yeah, bisexuality both both are you're going through something when I'm bored, when you're bored by all right, that might I like, that's rising bisexuality, Sun lesbian, moon asexual moon lesbian most of the time. Yeah, okay, rising is bisexual, Rising bisexual, I give bisexual, And I know that about myself. I know I thought she was I thought she was la. Really yeah, that lower case I would say, more than upper case you, I would. Wow, that's so different than how most people I think perceive me.

It's clear, I don't know, you don't know. It's like the vast button down black right now is very specific. Looks like you being bushwick. That don't have nothing to do with sexuality. It's just you know, wait, so you pulled a gun on me? No, no, no, before her did say you were on the J train.

Okay you might as well, lomer, but she said you er you get off that murder white off, don't you. That was what you just said to me from the uber though, from the uber thank you.

I'm not touching any of that. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Well lesbian on Locassian crying and helping your.

Holds on now.

Actually I wish that I was able to be so like outward like you are, like about like.

No, not your sexuality.

Oh yeah, like you you make it fun and like interesting and like oh yeah, like I feel like you can recruit the girls.

That's what I'm here for.

Yeah, when I talk about my lesbian ship, my friends be like, oh they got them straight man.

A lot. She's just showing up. She's just popping up. Yeah at your job. Yeah, but you like just being a crop top and just be like girls girls girls, And I mean like in a shawl like, yes, you know those women. Yeah, she's cold is.

A representation matters?

Right?

Beautiful and hunter you're straight? Yes? Yes? What kind of people do you date? Not for now girls, girl? What kind of people do you usually date? Men?

Yeah?

But like what come like great homophonbi God, that was church.

Men of man, the pizza at children's church. Believe that now that was good? That was good? Men seven like like creative people? Are are you dating? Finance bros? Is he six y five? Blue eyes? You got a boyfriend? Yeah? You cuped up? No? No, damn Sydney. Why are you?

I thought I know, I thought I had the research on the people I clearly yeah many weeks.

I'm so behind. I'm sorry.

Yeah, okay, here you can go opportunity though, just not Bushwick.

Yeah yeah Bushwick sixty. To me, I need someone who loves a bonnet.

Oh so.

You need someone who was like like you know those girls who on tiktalk who are like, oh like bonnet, Like I would never wear a bonnet to like the airport, But I want someone who like loves that for me, who like maybe sees it in my future.

I don't know.

So when if you walked out with a bonnet. They would be like, oh my god, I can't believe you doing it. Yeah, yeah, someone who loves a bonnet.

That sounds like a white man, a white man loves. Oh you're doing something different, jum on queen.

Oh my god, are.

You like, are you going to go see your family later?

Like you look like a sexy pill girl.

I take it back.

I no, no, big big bonnet.

Who paid me to say that this episode?

You know you're coming in that one from now?

Would you ever do bangs? No?

I don't, like I have a big forehead, but so maybe maybe in my future a little bit. But this is the thing I really hate when white women have curly bangs.

No. I love a curly bank like there's or like a curly bank like a big I love like like like curls like in the front, like a shaggy bang.

Yeah, I hate it. I don't.

I don't like like like an ungroomed dog girl.

Now the whole club what you're talking about?

Oh my gosh, what does she do to you? Did she say to your productosha? Like the lesbian white lesbian haircut?

They I don't like a curly bang either, though, I love a curly bang. It just it feels very.

Like like fake seventies, like period movie, like set in nineteen seventy two, but it's like, fully, we know those twenty fourteen That's what it's giving to me.

It sounds like a James Frankl project. You know what, I'm gonna pull it. I'm gonna pop out with a curly bang and not dare you bitches?

They got a clip on a clip on curly bang. You know you're not fucking with that?

No holding it?

Holding it?

Wait?

Great, say that, because that would be going in the I found your bank? Can you put this under your.

I love that, you know what? You know what I do hate that has nothing to do with bangs. It's just like people policing people's hair because it's just so hard to figure it out the whole. There's so much trial and error, and like you walk out, you think you're confident, You're like, I'm killing it, and then somebody will just be staring at the side of your head and it's like.

What what is it? Yeah? What is it? Yeah? Yeah, it's cut wrong. Yes, what do you want me to do? Oh? Wear a hat? Can't wear we're at a ball. I can't wear a hat and the ball a ball, girl? Where are you going?

We hit the ball and the ball the ball.

We're the bald girl. The galla is a gallon wall. What are you talking about? And maybe it is a ball. Yeah, it's the med.

Gall between the gala and a ball.

I mean, wait, hunter, do you ever wear your hair straight? Not? Really? I hate my own hair. It's not the real mouth.

You need the cream, you need the oil, but you can't hit the leven. We all seed the spray and then god forbid, you need the spec a brush.

But the way it looks when you leave the salon and you're feeling good about yourself, it's not the way it's gonna look when you wake up. No, no, no, And then like if I got to get up and do it every day.

My arm hurts when I'm drinking my own hair. Good, I'm painful a punzel.

Oh inches, yeah, so much. So.

Many of the trees are very long. Wait, should we do some like mess versus living? You have some mess living? Let's do it.

Yeah, your friend is unhoused, but you're like, no, you can't stay with me?

Is that mess? Or living? Like forever?

Yeah?

Well, I mean That's the thing is like you never know when they don't You don't know, you never know when they ask you and you're like, actually, I don't want this.

Is that? Is that mess? Or living? But I would say.

Yes, and then you're just yet available, book on an airbnb, anyone to stay with you, anybody the.

Guns I know, I know hundreds of different talks pockets. So she doesn't know about like kind of letting people into your home.

I'm just kind of giving back to the strife.

Look like she had blood work.

Your own doing.

She chose that curse. She let me get a glass of water.

I'm going to say a living I would with me. Yeah before I said if say, for instance, me in the front app and I said no, is that mess?

And I'm like no, or is it living? Because I'm putting up this this boundary that I don't want you to just say, oh god.

I just a little bit of mess. I think having a hard time of like a hard time out of like you have one week or you have like two weeks, not like I think you need to set a boundary there, but let them into your home, let them you got a week.

And then you had to figure out something else.

Yeah, the boundary is the time women, not the entering into the home.

Okay, sorry, what's the podcast you love?

We can do her things.

Yes, we can do hard things and the Glenna Doyle can do hard things.

We can do hard things. Is that what you learned from We can do hard things? And I'm like, oh, we can't do things. I like doing hard things. They're hard.

That's mess. You gotta do some hard things, like what life is hard? I want my life to be easy, but it has to be hard. And yes, a long cigarette.

It's like actually one of those little clip things like Krilla Deville.

Corilla Deville, mess or just living, just living. She really is just living, like what she can't be fabulous. Well, you can't get you can't kill dogs. She didn't kill the dog. She wanted.

And wanted to redistribute their first.

You're gonna have to shut out, he said. She wanted tostribute the redistribed. It is the day of the is the word of the day.

Make sure you use it.

In a sentence this week.

I'm definitely right now now, right now. Friend doesn't like fiance. Friend doesn't like fiance. Fiance. They're about to get married. They're like this friend can't come to the wedding, mess or just living that's mess.

Yeah, I think mess too.

That's loss of a friend, close friend, very close. So why she don't like the fiance? I need information?

Some people just don't get along. Well, if you don't get along, then you don't have to be here. But did he do something? You know?

I can't say all the Oh, I can't say everything, but I'm just saying this is not.

Custom.

I also want to say that it is. You don't have to like somebody's fiance or whatever. But then it's like, why do you want to go to the wedding because it's like, bitch, I've.

Been through all these she my friend ran through.

I should at least see her at the final Yes, the final.

Bro.

Yeah, well there's all those like uh like videos on line or whatever, and it'll be like me dancing at my friend's wedding after I told her to dump him seventeen times.

It's like, yeah, I'm gonna be at the wedding. I'll be there.

No, I want to party, Yeah, of course, of course I'm gonna be there. I think that's I though. I am a big believer and like my partner has to get along with my people. I think it's like a bad sign if depending on how you're close to your relationships are, which like for me, I feel really close to my friends. If there's haters that are like this isn't right, like I trust them, I don't trust myself. I trust them sometimes like hell though I've made some dumb decisions.

But I feel like if that is like there's already.

A bunch of conflict there, that's not a good sign to begin with, Like is this even the person you need to be marrying?

Wait?

When's the friend not liking the fiance or the fiance not liking the friend?

The friend the friend doesn't like the fiance. Friend don't fuck with fiance. Yeah, I'm not I don't really want to be around this guy. But wedding is in Sue and it's like, Okay, how come I didn't get that invite? Well, you don't like you don't like my man. She's like, but I'm I'm there for.

You, yeah, yester.

Yeah, But he was like, don't she don't like me? And the friend is like, hey, are you going to fight for me or not? Fiance said, I'm not paying for that plate.

Yeah, and no, you have the friend has to be right to the wedding.

Yeah, because listen, she's been with a friend more than she's been with a man.

That's a real relationship.

Okay, I think we did the work today.

Is there anything else that you would like to list for the people as being messy? We can lightning round it and then we'll let you go. Like I feel like we're in midtown. Midtown is mess always.

Office buildings are mess wait, especially now, office.

Buildings are mess every every elevator bay is different, every front desk is different. I joy to take my idea out. Do you need to pass all that stuff? I'm like, it makes me nervous.

Office buildings are mess.

One hallway in this building is a mess.

No, No, that is the different music every time I walked by.

Oh my, you know I took a photo of it. Yeah.

I loved the way it was different than the sonic Like I thought I was under attack. It was crazy.

I didn't I know I was under attacked.

They're playing Miley Cyrus that you take is a different station, right, So I stopped moving physically and it was like, I don't need to be woken up like this.

It really shook me. You didn't hear any songs that you like, is what I'm hearing.

Well, I was playing my own we Can Do Hard Things podcast, and you can imagine the peace and serenity. I was experiencing the two white women in.

My ear, and I was like, I did.

So dense. I don't know, I like to be a simulated I'm.

Gonna say, Amtrak is mess.

Oh business, I think it's just mess side No, truly, we were coming from d C.

First of all, that's already mess. You set yourself up for the mess.

Hot we had we could expense that, so we did business class or just somehow the very last train on the car back of the bus, her last car on the train, and we were like, it was like the Wendy Williams thing, like the wind Wioms gift of her, like jumping up and down.

It was crazy. It was so so bumpy.

I was so.

Yeah, the trucks, it was. It was unreal.

Now would you rather be on a plane in a drop like which one track? After everything that's been going on? I was, I just took the train and I said, showy is nice. I know, I'm I know, I'm gonna be okay, let me see the ground the quiet car quite.

Respect respect.

I think my new thing is I won't take a plane unless Denzel is like the captain.

But he was drunk. He wasn't alcoholic. He landed the plane, but they didn't. Somebody die. Well, I don't know if somebody died or not, but.

Yeah, no, I think that one.

But it wasn't his fault. Yeah, the one was. It was literally literally his football. But it was a plane malfunction. He know, the only thing.

They tested like twenty pilots and no one could land the plane except for him.

Every simulation crashed. Yes, I do love flight, it's serious. I didn't even know about the simulation. So he was an alcoholic who was flying a plane.

Sometimes you can be both.

Okay that for Southwest.

I want to on thongs or mess. I'm done with I know, and I'm tired.

It's just in there and it's just going back and forth and it's just it's just there.

And now are you wearing the wrong side or the wrong I will say the poem is is out there, so you know, I might mean need another size, it's probably, but what you're.

Looking at, miss Brawls.

That thank you so much. This is amazing.

Please let everybody know where they can find your asses.

Please.

Yeah, you can follow me on Instagram at Paton Dix and follow Hunter at Hunter h And.

The podcast is let me say this, what is it called? All streaming service podcast?

Wherever you get your podcasts? I don't know if we have a thank you.

Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Foston is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio podcast created and hosted by Sydney Washington and Marie Foston. Executive produced by Olivia Aguilar and Hans Sonny, super produced by Becca Ramos, Edited and mixed by Brian Jeffries.

If you would like your messages read on air, please email us at mess Thepodcast at gmail dot com, or call for your messages to be played at seven six three two eight zero six five eight eight