First off, Danielle and Adam have come a long way since they recorded the first episode about the Mental Load almost two years ago. However, the progress has definitely been incremental, and they still have work to do. What starts out as a calm conversation quickly turns defensive and competitive as they list off responsibilities, stresses, emotional tolls, and physical hardships they each endure in life and parenting. Danielle does not understand how Adam can possibly think they are 50/50 house...
Mar 01, 2021•1 hr 20 min•Ep. 159
After the overwhelming response to their first episode with Jodie Utter from last February, Danielle and Adam finally had the chance to continue their conversation with her. Where is she now in her journey of healing and forgiveness after her husband's infidelity? Is she able to trust again? How does she deal with the inevitable feelings of pain that come flooding back at any given moment? Is self-forgiveness harder than forgiving someone else? What advice does she have for others going through ...
Feb 22, 2021•1 hr 12 min•Ep. 158
One of the most common messages Danielle and Adam receive from listeners is that they and their partner mismatched libidos. Truthfully, 80% of couples experience one partner having a higher libido than the other. We all think that we're the only ones struggling with this, and we tend to take it personally when our partner isn't in the mood as often (or ever). But there are so many misconceptions and myths surrounding sex drives and compatibility. This episode breaks down some of those misconcept...
Feb 15, 2021•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 157
We are taught from a young age that doing for others is what makes us good, generous people. We are conditioned to say "yes" even when we're faced with something we really don't want to do. Obhave overtaken so many of our lives, that we have run out of time to do the things that truly matter to us. Our dreams and goals have been put on hold. But HOW do we say no? What's holding us back and how can we overcome it? "Recovering People Pleaser," Natalie Lue talks us through why we need to stop assoc...
Feb 12, 2021•54 min•Ep. 156
Adam and Danielle have had some week, between Adam working 24/7 and the kids being off from school and trapped in the house due to snow. Let's just say there wasn't a ton of prep time for this episode, but sometimes being unprepared can lead to some serious laughs and unplanned hilarity. That is exactly what happens in this episode. Adam and Danielle start off with some innocent conversation about a few recent episodes and some listener's messages and questions. Things go south really fast thoug...
Feb 08, 2021•1 hr 17 min•Ep. 155
Danielle and Adam could have kept talking to Bryde and twelve hours. They had so much to ask them, and the conversation just kept evolving and branching off into so many different directions. They discuss being a poly couple who is very curious, adventurous, and open-minded. What was their journey from monogamy to polyamory? How have they kept their jealousy in check? How has Jeremie's chronic illness affected decisions about their relationship? Why they live in separate houses and what is that ...
Feb 01, 2021•1 hr 28 min•Ep. 154
Note: This is episode is just two people sitting down to try to get acquainted with kinks and fetishes. This episode will be followed up by several others with experts as well as couples who are already immersed in the kink culture. Adam and Danielle are open about the fact that they sometimes participate in kink-adjacent activities. However, there is a whole world out there about which they know very little and would like to become more comfortable with so that it can be spoken about and experi...
Jan 25, 2021•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 153
So many of us are feeling like we have hit the "pandemic wall." We're exhausted, emotionally drained, and we're surrounded by our kids 24/7. Living in sweatpants and never getting a proper date night can definitely take its toll on romance, and at the end of the day, we just want to fall into bed and not be bothered. Sex and intimacy coach Leah Carey helps Danielle and Adam understand what baby steps we can take to bring that connection back, and try to keep the frustration and distance we feel ...
Jan 18, 2021•1 hr 6 min•Ep. 152
(SKIP AHEAD TO 17:45 TO HEAR JUST THE ADVICE PORTION OF THE EPISODE) If there's one thing Adam and Danielle make very clear all the time, it's that they are not experts in pretty much anything. However, on this episode, Adam and Danielle first discuss their own history with therapy, and then they take a chance and answer listeners questions about certain issues with marriage and life. Using their own twenty years of experience in marriage, the two of them try their best to give insight on physic...
Jan 11, 2021•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 151
This year has been such insanity that there really is no way to even explain it. However, Danielle and Adam sit down to dissect and discuss it all in the style of which only the two of them are really capable. After 12 months of sheer chaos, we're all feeling emotionally and physically depleted. But that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of laughs to be had when we really think about how inexplicable it all really is. Sit back and start 2021 with a chuckle, a feeling of pride, hopefulness, and ma...
Jan 04, 2021•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 150
Original Airdate: October 21, 2019 It's incredible how the roles and careers we choose to partake in as adults turn out to be nothing like we expected, and how little we were warned what is truly involved in life at work and at home. In this episode, Danielle discusses how shocking it is that being a stay-at-home-mom is not at all how she pictured it, and she's constantly feeling like a failure because she's terrible at the aspects of being a "homemaker" that she never thought about. She also di...
Dec 21, 2020•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 149
TRIGGER WARNING: This episode discusses alcohol and other substances. If this is a topic that is sensitive or triggering to you, please skip this one. Adam and Danielle both have a history with indulgence, and sometimes can tip the scale to the excess when it comes to having a good time and living life to the fullest. This episode explores the unhealthy behaviors in which so many of us partake, because they make us feel better and can often lead to great nights and memories. But of course they a...
Dec 14, 2020•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 148
Not only are we almost ten months into a pandemic (and 82% of our community said they're definitely facing pandemic fatigue), but we are about the go into the holiday season, causing even more stress and pressure. How can we keep our dwindling energy up to get through what feels like is about to be a very tough winter? How can we practice self-compassion? How can we keep our family on board with staying safe and finding the most in the current situation despite the disappointments and anxiety? W...
Dec 07, 2020•58 min•Ep. 147
In this fun episode, Adam and Danielle discuss all the ridiculous decisions they've made over the years, as individuals, as parents, and as husband and wife. Recently, Danielle has been using the excuse, "but it's a pandemic," to rationalize some crazy behavior and over-indulgence. They also discuss the insanely young age Danielle first started smoking, how Adam risked his life multiple times hitchhiking, the large purchases they've made even though they had absolutely no business making them, a...
Dec 01, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 146
Following up on Mia's episode on unconditional acceptance, Danielle and Adam got a lot of requests for an episode with just the two of them discussing what unconditional acceptance means to them. Danielle gets vulnerable discussing what she felt she was maybe not so accepted about while growing up and even today. The two discuss if there is anything their children could do to make them not accept them. Adam reflects on whether he feels unconditionally accepted by Danielle, and how toxic their re...
Nov 23, 2020•59 min•Ep. 145
Danielle and Adam are taking you back to when it all first started: meeting, re-meeting, wedding planning, those first few years of marriage, and everything in between. Anyone engaged or newly married will definitely want to hear this episode. Anyone who was married at a younger age will understand how there are so many aspects of their wedding that they would do so differently now. Why was Danielle hesitant about their relationship in the beginning? What regrets do they have about those first f...
Nov 16, 2020•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 144
Dana Suchow is an eating disorder survivor, and an award-winning speaker and body empowerment coach. Her goal is to teach parents how to raise kids to have a healthy, balanced relationship with food and exercise. In this episode, Dana tells her personal story of overcoming her trauma concerning food and her body image, and reflects on how diet culture has completely manipulated parents and kids into thinking they are never enough. She helps Danielle understand how some of her own parenting tacti...
Nov 09, 2020•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 143
Gary John Bishop, bestselling author of "Unf*ck Yourself," talks all about his unique philosophy and why we are the only ones standing in the way of us and what we want. What does it mean to be "wise as f*ck?" How did he learn to REALLY love the people in his life unconditionally? What can we do to really start living as our authentic selves? Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here . Use code "MNMPODCAST" for 15% off. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...
Nov 02, 2020•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 142
This episode is by far one of the most personal and vulnerable of the Marriage and Martinis podcast yet. In this special episode, Adam and Danielle's oldest child, 15-year-old Mia Silverstein comes on to discuss her experience grappling with sexual identity, and what she wants kids and parents everywhere to know about self, family, and social acceptance as someone in the LGBTQ community. What was "coming out" like for her? How has social media both helped and hindered her experience with self-co...
Oct 19, 2020•1 hr•Ep. 140
Callie and Jeff are fellow married podcasters, and they are about to have their first baby. Adam has a blast "initiating" Jeff into the world of parenthood with stories of "choose your own adventure"c-sections and instilling a good, healthy fear of living without sleep. Callie and Danielle share their stories about being on anxiety medication during pregnancy, decisions to bottle or breast feed, and Adam and Danielle let Callie and Jeff in on all the hidden gems of an elongated hospital stay. Pl...
Oct 12, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 139
Danielle and Adam cover a lot of different conversations in this episode that just happened to flow really freely. What happened when Danielle planned an overnight date night for the two of them but then got angry with Adam? What did Adam reveal about why he was being so short-tempered and irritable all week? What did they do on their date night that they have never done before? How does Danielle react to a new secret that Adam reveals? If you've been feeling disconnected from your partner due t...
Oct 05, 2020•58 min•Ep. 138
Eve Rodsky has committed her life to help couples achieve a happier and more fulfilling life as partners tackling the domestic and household responsibilities. Not only did she interview hundreds of couples and research for years about the stress of "the mental load," but she has come up with real solutions. Especially now, during the pandemic, moms are feeling the overwhelming stress of home, work, and school all coming together in one forum, and the burden at times feels like too much to bear. ...
Sep 28, 2020•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 137
Denmark consistently ranks in the top three countries in regards to happiness and fulfillment among its residents. Danielle speaks to distinguished writer and psychoanalyst Iben Sandahl about what they're doing differently from other countries, and what we can learn and implement into our own daily parenting in an attempt to achieve some of this same positivity. In this informative episode, they talk about everything from the importance of "free play," the danish family practice of "hygge" (toge...
Sep 21, 2020•51 min•Ep. 136
New home, new school year, new attitudes?? Adam and Danielle discuss how they would like to do things differently this time around financially, as parents, and as individuals. How does Danielle think she needs to change her attitude concerning difficult circumstances? What are they hoping to achieve concerning their relationship now that they are attempting to "start fresh?" What does Danielle hope Adam will help with more than he has been recently concerning their kids? This episode is relatabl...
Sep 14, 2020•58 min•Ep. 135
Danielle and Adam have been very honest about their issues with mental health, ADHD, and addiction. But what else in life do they feel has held them back? What experience did Danielle have in college that still affects her to this day? What does Adam think has been his biggest hurdle in terms of buckling down and really taking care of responsibilities? How has the pandemic only made everything even more complicated? Listen to hear their always real and raw take on life's obstacles and how hard i...
Sep 04, 2020•1 hr•Ep. 134
While Danielle and Adam are always open and vulnerable, this episode takes certain things to a new level. What will Danielle not do because she's worried that at 41 years old she'll still disappoint her dad? What sexual position does she despise? What are Adam's serial killer tendencies? Why is he embarrassed about his bathroom habits? They both reveal insecurities that are not easy to admit. If you are easily offended or uncomfortable, this will definitely NOT be the episode for you. Purchase t...
Aug 10, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 133
People in Danielle and Adam's life know them to be....how shall we say...."serial movers." They're currently getting ready to move into their sixth home together, and especially during a pandemic, to say this has been stressful is an understatement. People are asking, why the move again? What mistakes have they made that has led to so many relocations? How do they deal with big change and uncertainty? What advice to they have for people going through big readjustments in life? How do they deal w...
Aug 03, 2020•57 min•Ep. 132
Danielle and her mom, Linda, sat down to talk about ways parenting has changed since the 1960s. How did parents in the 1960s explain how babies are made? Why did moms in the 80s leave their kids in the car while they food shopped for an hour? In this funny, revealing conversation about "who had it tougher," one thing was definitely determined: parenting has always been ridiculously confusing and overwhelming. Purchase the Date Night Questions Experience paperback book here . Use code "MNMPODCAST...
Jul 27, 2020•1 hr 6 min•Ep. 131
What makes a person sexy? How has Danielle and Adam's ideas of sexiness changed over the years? Turn offs? How does body image affect their sexual identity and confidence? This episode covers so many different aspects of sexiness, lust, compliments, and all the things we try to keep going throughout the years of our relationship. Plus, what's the sexiest place Danielle and Adam have ever been, sexiest movie they've ever watched, etc. Mentions in the episode: Erika Lust's TED Talk Marta Meana stu...
Jul 20, 2020•1 hr 16 min•Ep. 130
Who would win in a face-off of questions about anything from personal details about their life, politics, science, history, and so much more. In this hilarious episode, Danielle and Adam try to stump one another by asking questions about things like Danielle's bra size, how many sexual partners Adam has had, where they lost their virginity and so much more. This episode is pretty explicit from the beginning, so be ready to be shocked, but also be ready to laugh. Purchase the Date Night Questions...
Jul 13, 2020•1 hr 12 min•Ep. 129
