How To Stop Overthinking #550

Understanding that I could do this and learning the process that I'm about to share in this episode , I'll really freed up my mind and has allowed me to create huge levels of success in all the areas of my life and , most importantly , it's given me peace of mind when I was stuck in the trap right the rut of constantly overthinking , paralysis by analysis I was

stuck and , as a man , one of the most important things that I have recognized that's important to me is I want to be making progress . I want to feel like I'm making progress . Overthinking does not allow that , and when you feel like you're not making progress , it's a crap place to be living in .

So my name is Lachlan Stewart and I have been a men's high performance coach for the last seven years . I've worked with over 800 men , I've done over 550 podcast episodes interviewing some of the greatest athletes , businessmen and men that I know , and I am just continuing to want to teach things that have helped me live a better life .

One thing that I believe is really important I'll be doing a separate episode on this shortly is the understanding that your life shouldn't just be self development . It shouldn't just be consuming content like this .

I'm grateful that you're here , but I also want to inspire you to actually start living your life , and that's where today's episode around how to stop overthinking has come in . I am someone who aspires to live a great life , and to me , that means being around great people who challenge me .

I can laugh with them , I can create great experiences with them , I can feel loved and valued . It also means maximizing my health and the experiences that are available to me , as well as creating adventures . You know I want to really look back at my life for resume , and Jesse Itzler talks about this a lot .

If you were to look at your life now and the things that you've done , would you be proud of that resume ? Would you hire you as someone to hang out with ? And I've really been focused on that . So , while I am very passionate about the work that I do , I'm very mindful that I want to be living my life in other areas as well .

So when I look back on my awesome the Man-Mit-Can project impacted a lot of men's life . It was something that I was so proud and grateful to wake up and work on every day . But I also , you know , wrote 30 marathons in 30 days . I traveled the world with my wife . We lived in Nashville . I've lived in France .

I've , you know , had all these incredible experiences . So I encourage you to do that and overthinking and implementing what we would discuss now . It's going to allow you to really move through that life resume at a much faster pace . So , three things we're going to cover Awareness , so the signs that you're overthinking . Secondly , challenge Become solution focused .

Once you do this , you can then move into the work . You would have heard people talk about the work . I have spoken about it on earlier episodes , but the work is where you overcome the things that are holding you back .

So the negative beliefs sorry , the negative emotions the limiting beliefs , the reason why you aren't getting the outcomes that you want from your life .

Most people aren't living their dream life , especially men aren't living their dream life not because they don't have it within them to do so , but because the stories that they're telling themselves is what's really holding them back . So this is going to be more game changing to you than you maybe even realize when you clipped to play .

The first thing is becoming aware of the problems . You've probably met people in your life where they keep having the same problems and you're sitting there scratching your head . They'll come to and say , oh man , this is still happening , enjoy life . When we talking about this months ago , have you done anything different ? You probably their responses no , I've just .

You know this is . It just keeps happening . It's not me , it's them . And what you've become aware of is that they're Overthinking or worrying about a situation , but they're not doing anything to change it . They haven't become solution focused .

I guarantee you , if you notice that in other people , there are moments in your own life where you're doing that I always am putting my hand up . It's why I'm very grateful to hang around with high-performing men and people in the Academy because they can call me out on this Quite often when we're .

You know picture like this if you see yourself naked every day , you don't notice changes , whether you're getting fatter or whether you're getting thinner . But if you were to take progress photos and use that as a way to hold yourself accountable and just go , man , I'm putting on a few pounds or geez , I'm getting fit .

You know that what you're doing is improving on that . But if in your life you don't have people there who are going to make you aware of challenges , or you don't have ways to hold yourself accountable , to become aware of challenges , or you're not taking responsibility , you're probably going to go in one or the other way .

And for most people , they find themselves extremely wealthy but they're extremely fat . Or they've found themselves extremely wealthy but they're on their fourth wife and their kids don't talk to them . Or they find themselves extremely healthy but they don't have any money to take any trips or to support their family .

So there's always trade-off right and being aware allows you to really build that life . And , once again , the benefit and the reason why I created the strongmen of value Academy but was because I wanted access to men who were really crushing it in areas of their life .

Because what I could speak to a gentleman who's killing it in business you know he's growing his business 500% since he's been in the Academy I'm like man , I want to prioritize my business . But one of the cool things about him as well , he's got a family and prioritizes that and his health . So I'm like , okay , well , you can achieve success in all areas .

It's just about developing skills , creating leverage and Actually doing the thing , and not being paralyzed by analysis . So the awareness this is the stage where many are stuck and you're not making progress . Don't undervalue how important it is for you to be making progress . It impacts your confidence , the way that you view yourself and what you think is possible .

And I truly believe you're listening to this podcast because you dream big , you want an incredible life and you've got this feeling like I have my stomach , that you're here to do something great . You may not know what that is yet , but you've got that feeling .

And if you have that feeling , I am here to tell you and I am living proof that if you start with this awareness piece , you can create anything for your life . I'm not saying there's any quick fixes there's definitely not but you can do the thing that is required in order to continue growing right , moving into that solution focused area .

So when you become Aware , just be mindful of this . If you're feeling stuck , if you're feeling like you're not making progress , there's a high probability that you are over thinking things . Now , every decision that you make or Decisions that need to be made carry different weight .

For example , deciding who you're gonna marry is probably a bit bigger decision than deciding what you're having for lunch . But if you're continually deciding to have the wrong lunch day in , day out , chances are you probably not gonna feel good , you're probably not gonna be healthy , so you need the feedback from that .

If I'm , you know , overweight , I need to be aware around what I'm consuming , or how much I'm exercising or how much , maybe , alcohol you're drinking . So you need to think about that and , rather than going I don't know or I'm probably not , start tracking stuff . We've got to become solution focused .

And this moves us into point two , and I'll tie this in at the end with an example of how the awareness piece , how becoming solution focused and then how doing the work , all ties together so that you can stop overthinking . Most people don't get what they want , and not through the lack of being able to , but it's just mentally .

They're holding themselves back , and this is those limiting thoughts that I spoke about . We need to move into the solution focus area . So it's like what do I need to do here to make progress ? So , now that I'm overthinking , we need to ask ourselves why am I overthinking . What am I overthinking about ?

This is where we will start bringing up the things that you need to work on right . It could be the fear of failure . Some people in business might go I want to start a side hustle , I want to start a business , but I could never do a business . I haven't done a business degree , or I have no experience , or I don't know what the first step is .

And because of that limiting belief in those negative thoughts that follow , you never do the thing . You have this feeling , once again , that I've spoken about that you can do more , that you want to start that business , but you listen to the thoughts and you don't do it . And then you continue to live your life wondering what , if , what , if , what , if ?

The trick here , gentlemen , is to go okay , maybe I haven't started a business , maybe I don't have any experience , maybe I don't know that first step , okay , and then we now need to move to problem .

For our solution focus , it's like , okay , anyone who has ever started a business was at some point in their life in the same position where they hadn't started a business . The only way you can get to a point where you have experience of starting a business is by starting a business . So now that we can start going , okay , I don't need to overthink .

I need to be aware of what I'm overthinking about . I need to bring up the reasons why I feel I'm overthinking , whether it's fear , it's fear of judgment , fear of success , not knowing what to do , because now you're creating the next questions for yourself .

What is the worst case if I fail ? For most of us it's not much . I knew if I failed in business , I still have a roof over my head , I'd still be able to work as a builder , okay . But it was more so the fear of judgment . And I realized it wasn't the failure itself , it was the judgment . What would people think if I failed in business ?

I then shifted that to go . Well , what will I think if I don't actually try ? So by shifting that once again , we've now become solution-focused and I was then able to go okay , I'm going to start . What do I need to do ? The first thing is probably read a book on what are the first things to start around business , or Google it .

Give yourself a bit of a roadmap .

You're going to recognize that when you start business , there is so many things to do , so many systems , so many processes and so many ways of going about it , and you can speak to 100 business owners and every bit of advice they give you could be different around how to start , but if you can just give yourself things to do , you've now started a task list ,

and when you give yourself things to do and actually start doing them , you'll notice that you're not overthinking . You're now using real life data , real life feedback around . Okay , this is what now has to happen . Next , you don't have time to overthink when you're doing , and so that's why I recognize really quickly the power of .

If I overthink which I do I need to ask myself what is the one thing that I am overthinking about and why , and what can I do to start creating a solution for this ? And there's always an action item . There's always something to do . That's why we see people who are highly successful . They're always doing something , they're always making progress and we go .

How are they doing that ? Because they're choosing not to overthink by acting . They're using the feedback by the actions , and I'm not saying they always make the perfect decision . They definitely don't , and I definitely don't . But every decision I make is giving myself a real life feedback for the next decision .

So that is why it's very beneficial to get to that . You know , challenge those the reasons why you're overthinking and become solution focused . What do you need to do to get you to that next step ? And I always believe in the foundations , and comparison , once again , can be perceived as a bad thing .

You might feel inadequate or you could use it as I aspire to be like , and when you're in the framework or the looking through the lens of I aspire to be like , you can then go . Okay , well , they're here , and that's where I really , once again , want to get to . But what do I need to do ? First , you had to crawl before you could walk .

You had to walk before you could run . You had to , I guess , learn to run slowly before you could sprint , and there are always steps and only by doing will you be able to work out what's missing for you . Okay , finally , this brings us to the point of doing the work Now . Obviously , you can't out , act or outmaneuver bad thoughts .

I believe it helps definitely with building your confidence and helping you to become more courageous , but for some of us , our initial thought is negative I'm not worthy , I don't deserve this . What if they think that I'm not a good person . But those first thoughts , what we can control is that second thought .

So when we identify negative thoughts that we're having right amount on a piece of paper these are all the ones that I've had in the last seven days or the last couple of hours and on the flip side , it's like what's the complete opposite of that . So nobody likes me , everybody likes me . I can't be wealthy .

I have an abundance of money Okay , you understand that .

And then what we need to do to condition ourselves , to flex a muscle , is to focus on the thoughts that we want to have , that are going to deliver the way of thinking that we need in order to continue building our confidence and helping us Be more , create , courageous sorry , to act and do the thing that we know we need to do .

So there's , you know , there's a couple of books around doing the work and it never stops . It's all internal , but my biggest thing is the better relationship you can build with yourself , and that , to me , is ultimately doing the work .

But if you look at limiting beliefs , negative emotions , fears , trauma , all that sort of stuff , you don't have to do that all before you can start doing anything . Great , that's a lifelong journey and throughout life , you're going to overcome fears , traumas and bad experiences , and you're probably going to accumulate more , which means it doesn't stop .

It's why the work just continues going , and sometimes , actually , it's freezing outside . It's winter here in the States , but seasons of life You're not always in summer . Don't expect yourself to be so . Make sure that when you're aware of things , you become solution focus and you continue doing the work .

You're going to be coming , so you're going to continue becoming that version of yourself that you need to be in order to deliver the results and the outcomes that you want from your life . If you don't do that , then you can continue over thinking , but you already know how that feels and it's not productive . You don't feel good about yourself .

You feel like you're stuck in a rut . So , finally , to finish up , if that's how you're feeling , if that's where you're living right now , my go to is one be aware of that thought , so write it down on paper . Now I am overthinking about X Cool . The proof to this is why what I need to do to create a solution is when can I do it ?

Giving yourself a timeframe . Then you do the thing and you'll notice how you start breaking it down brick by brick and if you're really lacking confidence , start with small goals , start with small actions .

Once again , chip away , chip away , chip away doing the things that I do now in business or with podcasts , or hosting the guests that I have .

Seven years ago , when I started the podcast , I wasn't , I guess , the version of lucky I am now that would have been able to facilitate those conversations , would have been able to get those people in the podcast because of the value that I wasn't offering . But rather than going , I'm going to be there tomorrow .

I've just slowly chipped away at it , slowly chipped away at it . So , thank you , guys , for listening . If you've listened to the end , even better , make sure you subscribe so you don't miss another episode and you can connect with me on Instagram , obviously , wherever you're listening right now .

But I would highly encourage , if you've listened the whole way through and you're getting value , check out our strongman of value Academy . You will get so much more value on top of these podcast episodes and it will complete the help you transform your life . My name is looking , stuart . As always , do something today to be better for tomorrow .