Why Every Goal Suddenly Feels Urgent (and What Lazy Gewls Do Next)

You're listening to a Muma Mia podcast.

Muma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters that this podcast is recorded on Welcome to Mumma out Loud.

What women are actually talking about on Wednesday, the tenth of September.

I am Jesse Stevens.

I am Amelia Lester, and I am Stacy Hicks.

Feeling in for Holly and Holly is off today.

Stacy, you busted the door down because you it's not customary, but you say.

You have a midweek recommendation.

Yeah, I'm just breaking the rules. I busted in. I've got one. It's good. I promise, I promise it's good.

Well, we're going to save it till the end of the show. Here is what is on our agenda for today.

There's been an update to the infamous Coldplay concert affair and it will change the way you view relationships.

There are two new species of men that we need to be looking out for in the wild.

And the great lock in. Why all your goals suddenly feel urgent? And self optimization is very much on the agenda.

But first, in case you missed it, a new season of Succession Disdrupped.

Give it to Me please just kidding.

What actually happened was the Murdoch family, on whom the TV show Succession is based, have finally figured out how to divide up ninety four year old Rupert Murdoch's billions.

I know you were worried for them.

It's so stressful.

What actually happened was apparently they hadn't even thought about this until they started watching Succession, and then they looked at each other and said, hang on, we've got to figure out what to do with these billions because Rupert will probably slip his mortal coil soon. So this cued many years of infighting, many many years. They ended up in a court room in Nevada, which is in the

And the one who gets nothing.

There are two from his marriage to Wendy Dang. We can set those two aside. They just want the money. They're not interested in the power so we don't have to worry about them. We're just talking about the four older kids from the two first marriages. The problem is they don't agree politically. Lachlan Murdock, who was Rupert's favorite, he's all in on Fox News, which is how Rupert has made a lot of his money. He loves the fact that Fox News pushed Donald Trump into the presidency.

That's fine, got to do it, Yes, I mean, I'm good to me that.

Yeah, Lachlan takes over Fox News when Rupert dies and goes full steam ahead on the conservative bent of Fox News, and the other three just get to enjoy some time on yachts. They've promised they'll never get involved with Fox News ever again.

Okay, so this is my theory because interesting timing is what I'll say. On Friday, Stacy, did you listen to Friday's episode?

I sure did.

Okay, well, it's an episode you would know that we talked about the Google doc that everyone needs to fill out the satche before the spreadsheet, right, that you need to fill out before you die. So my theory is that Rupert listened as he often does, and he went, I've got to get to the bottom of this because you never know, you never know when your time's up.

He just said, Lachlin, and I'm all in on.

Lock clank go with Lachlin. I think that's probably what happens. But I don't think that they're going to be talking to each other anytime soon. So James Murdoch, who some people say is the smartest Murdoch some people, Yeah, if you're listening Rupert and Lachlin, and he has spoken about how Rupert was really mean to him all through this Rupert's lawyers in a deposition said things to him like

Oh that's petty.

So James was very upset about all of that, and I think it's safe to say that Lachlin and James are kind of like the new William and Harry. They're not talking and I don't see a reconciliation in the cards anytime soon.

And is important to my millennial reference point is that Lachlan is of course married to Sarah Murdoch, form the host of Australia's Next Top Models, and that's what matters.

That's what matters. Yeah, okay, So we always talk about how the world's small, fragmented than ever now it's impossible to gain mass attention. But nothing quite united the world quite like the Coldplay concert chating scandal. Like you would have been hard pressed to find someone who didn't know the details of that, so you'd probably never even heard of the company astronomer before the CEO, Andy Byron, was called canoodling on the kiss can That's the only way

It changes everything.

And I feel like at the time we were saying, we don't know what the arrangement of someone else's marriage is. We don't know if they're still together. It was two seconds of footage and people jumped on so fast, and images of her and her husband were released pretty immediately.

Well, yeah, this just makes me think about an adage that my mom has always passed along to me, which is, you don't know what is happening in someone else's marriage, no matter how much you think you know, even if it's your best friend at alone, some random person on the internet, you just can never actually tell what the dynamic is. And I feel like that's really relevant in the Internet age, because the way we think we understand people's relationships is what they post on social media or

Yeah, totally. The people who are always loudest about their relationships are always the ones that you end up suddenly seeing the breakup post from on the notes app on their Instagram.

Yeah.

Even Jennifer Lopez j LO as I as I know her was gushing about how she'd never felt more beautiful than when she was with Ben Affleck, and then a couple of weeks later they were filing for divorce. Like, I feel like you're protesting too much, You trying to prove something to.

Yeah, fast on, fast off, Yeah, I always worry about that, and I have a theory.

We spoke I remember maybe a few months.

Ago about vow renewals, because remember Brooklyn Beckham and Nicola Peltzbeckham were getting their vows renewed, and it's like, oh, is that a is that almost like a red flag that you kind of feel the need to display your love after two years?

Yeah?

Yes, And the loudness of it I think makes people feel a little bit uncomfortable.

And yeah, what are you trying to prove? What are you trying to say to us? Here? We get it, you're married.

What's behind it?

But then I was talking to some friends last night and have you seen the images from that of our renewal with yes, so pictures of it's not just of our renewal, Like she's in a wedding dress, Nicola pel Oh, Yeah, like and she's looking stunning.

And we were saying, she's changed her.

Hair, right, So she was blonde the first time she got married, and now she's a brunette.

She's looking great, And that's key.

It's key because it feels like when Mea gets a haircut. People might not know this, but every time Maya gets a haircut. She wants new headshots, and she says.

We have to make a new art.

Were like, we can't just design our lives around you and your haircut now, because you're changing it all the time. So I think that sometimes with marriages and with weddings, we think, well, now I'm a brunette wife, and so I need images to reflect who I am now, and we'll all say how we look back at our pictures and go, well, I wouldn't mind redoing a bit of a photo shoot. I was six months pregnant. I wouldn't mind having a little bit of a waste.

My wedding day was called Stormageddon in the papers the next day, so you can imagine the humidity that I had to deal with as a curly girl, so the hair was not at prime. I would love to renew for that reason alone.

Your husband doesn't need to be there, no see you in a photography me exactly.

I do have regrets about the fact that I got married in maybe the most humid place in the world at the most humid time of year, and I wore my hair down because I was going for Kate Middleton vibes.

That was what we thought looked good.

Back then and now I'm like, that was not very practical of me. The hair should have been up.

We were saying, it's like, you think you're gonna wake up on your wedding day because we're sold like this kind of princess lie that we're going to wake up on our.

Wedding day and look like a bride.

But you wake up and you still have your face, and you still have your body, and it's still you still and you smile like an idiot, and do you look at pictures You're like, my photographer was absolutely brilliant, but like, I am not the stuff of Bridle magazines.

I'm not.

But in my vowur renule, perhaps I will be. Perhaps I will be.

I know is Nicola Peltzberg. And that's why we will get a vour nule every two years for the rest of time.

Three and a half sorry, very significant date.

Time has flown exactly three and a half years.

I'm just wondering to bring it back to the Coldplay couple if what their big mistake was here was that they looked so guilty instead of leaning into what we now understand to be kind of like hot divorce energy, they were feeling themselves there at the Chris Martin serenade until the camera came onto them.

Because they were time.

That was their crime. They looked guilty rather than embracing the energy of divorces.

There was a great article in the Sidney Morning Herald at the time by Tim Duggan, who writes a lot about work and career, and he was saying that what workplaces, all workplaces should have is something called a relationship.

Registry, and that's brilliant.

You need to have it because I wonder if when they hid. There's a lot of ways to read it, right, it's maybe to protect the children. We don't know if the other guy in it. I'm sure like it does look like maybe he was still in Yes, but her maybe she didn't want our kids to know. Also, the workplace might not have known yet. And stats show that like between one in three and two in three people have had a relationship in the workplace.

I think I know someone.

I think that.

We work as the one in three because anyone else had I have.

I'm also married to my former co.

Work in three. You're the odd one out of me.

I cannot imagine doing it, but God bless you well.

It says that what you should have is like a relationship registry where the whole office doesn't need to know, but because of things like conflicts of interests and promotions and you know, lines of management and everything, you just let them know. You can just put it on like to your HR person. I mean, the issue is she was at HR. Maybe she put it in. Maybe she

Can I can I ask a little bit of an intrusive question, Stacy, when you got together with your now husband at work, don't you have to tell HR and sort of the HighRes up at some point? And how did you decide when to do that?

We did, and we then had the conversation over well, I don't want to go in. You go in, you go, you go tell him, you go telling me what you are closer with him, you've been here longer, you go let him know. So that's what we did. It's so awkward.

It was very.

Awkward, and when the person had all gone south very quickly, which you know it might have done. So how did you decide? It was kind of like maybe a month in and it was kind of.

Like brushed at each other.

Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, I guess so. So it was because return and have.

A hook up and then be like, oh, I'm declaring it to HR and they're like don't, it's over.

And then you're sitting together in an editorial meeting kitchen stories. Yeah, so it's a very delicate space. But even other people in this company got pulled into this story that weren't even part of this story. Yeah, and this is another thing that has flown under the radar. It got corrected at some point along the line, but no one even knows that the woman that was standing next to them

She was not.

Involved in any way in the story. But that is now something that people believe about that company. So it's funny how these things will just move along now is fact that that will forever be known as part of the story. There was also a fake statement from Andy Byron, the CEO, that got widely circulated on the day not real.

Also she resigned right yeah, and I'm looking back at it, going she'd do anything wrong?

Did she?

Like?

I know that reputationally they can go. It caused maybe a bit of damage, although they actually capitalized off it. They got Gwyneth Paltrow in an ad, but I don't know why she had to listen.

I think when you're head of h R, it's a bit unfortunate that she's caught in this way. But look, I think the biggest problem with it was maybe the Coldplay of it all. If this was at an Oasis concert. You know, the northern summer has been punctuated with Oasis concerts, and they're coming here soon, I think that's very on brand Oasis. They're bad boys, like you kind of expect people to be having affairs, So it felt like Coldplay

Yeah, I see such creatures on the train.

Yes, this is a creature that we can now name. This man has been identified. He is known as the performative male. Move over the softboy. This is the performative male. He's not just in touch with his emotions. He is performing his emotions and muma me as Katie Powers wrote a great piece for The Sight kind of summing him up. She said, he puts his headphones in, picks up his matcher, opens his book to the first page. He is a cocktail of green flags, a man written for the female gaze.

I hate this. I hate the term.

Why because it's the male equivalent of the pick me girl. And I shudder when I hear the term pic me girl. I find it so degrading and so sexist.

Can you just describe quickly what a pickme goal is, because I've never really understood that.

Yeah.

So often it's used to talk about a young woman who seeks validation and attention by acting in a way that they believe men will find desirable. So what annoys me about it is that, like, the male gaze is so just a fixture of our culture, and then when any of us play to it as we are socialized to do, we're then punished as well. And like the idea that a heterosexual person would do something to impress the opposite sec like, yeah, that happens all the time.

So you think it's a bit mean, I think.

It's a bit mean.

And as you say, Amelia, none of those qualities, like some of the other qualities I saw were like men who paint their nails or kind of play with gender a little bit, or maybe they talk about their sisters a lot, or offer to go and buy you some tampons or something.

Like all of those things.

At what point are we actually just punishing men for transgressing our ideas of masculine boundaries.

But I think the difference with this and how it seems to get defined, it's not about men who are doing things that you would traditionally see as more feminine, like the nail painting. It's more about how they're performing their love of femininity.

Should we want men to try and like play with different like even if they have their Sally Rooney and maybe they'll hate it, But like I thought we were in cocouraging men to read, like isn't that a god? Just sit there with your book and maybe they'll enjoy it.

But it's if they actually read it, Jesse's when it's they're on the table at ten different angles for them to post it on the Instagram to get validation from women that they're reading it.

That in itself a bit of a power in version that men are suddenly aware of the female guess, that the male gaze has like impacted us all so much that now they're not only aware of the female gaze, but they're pandering to it.

Great, we could do with a bit more of that.

No bit, Jesse, This is justin Baldoni. You're saying how great this is that they're pandering to the female gaze. But have you ever spoken to a man who talks about how he's a feminist every second sentence? It's very annoying?

Yes, But have you ever spoken to a woman who, like, I know a lot of women who talk about feminism and social justice issues and all of that, and they're assholes? You know, like, sometimes people are just assholes. I keep seeing these new terms, even like himbo is the other one that's.

Going No, no, let me tell you about the other way please, just could be an interesting in contrast, So we've got the performative males, which unsurprisingly have been a species explored by, among other publications, The Guardian Lads come in with its hot take on Travis Kelsey, who I thought was pretty universally I thought he was nice.

Yeah.

No, apparently he's not just a himbo, he's a who me man? And that's a problem. Let me explain the who me man? So this is the guy who comes across as done but lovely but is actually full of strategy and calculations. They refuse to talk about politics, but that's only because they've decided that being a political works for them. So Travis. That's why Travis is kind of the patron saint of this crowd, because think about the fact that Donald Trump says on social media that he

And do we force them into the end? Like I don't want to patronize men? And I think that it's like the idea.

I was listening to someone speak recently who was talking about how we all go, how.

Do you be a good man? What a feature of a good man? Like that the first problem?

By the way, talking about how to be a good man? Yes, And it's like nails on a chalk water.

Yes, And she just went, can we just talk about being a good person? Like they're the same criteria, the same qualities. There's a tone of contempt that I think underlies a lot of these Internet conversations, and I found it in abundance in that Slate article that was like men can tell when people are being sort of needlessly cruel about them even there was a line in the Slate article that said football is by its very nature

Yeah, but this to get back to the performative man, this is about them pretending to be a feminist, not actually being one, and that's why people have such strong feelings about it. So I wanted to make sure that the audience know how to spot this man in the world.

Give me more exams, Okay, So I.

Polled our Mamma Mia team, who had a lot of strong feelings. I got flooded, quite frankly, with the things that make you a performative man. So there's ones that we've kind of talked about, like proudly having the tampons in the console of the car to kind of show their they're an ally to the women. I think that's helpful. They carry the canvas hope we know that one. They usually own a shirt that says the future is female, but don't ask you any questions.

On a date.

This is why they're getting annoyed, which is fair enough. They have a lot of these feminist books you speak of, you know, like The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. They've got that on their bookshelf. But if you look closely, the spine is not crat it's there for display. It's not there to be read or betty. Yet they're reading them in public, but they're making sure they're angled up so everyone can see what they're reading in public.

Stacy, have you ever done that? Maybe a little bit?

Have we ma just a book to have in our bag for those moments when other people will see our cover.

That's the problem with the ca Have I allowed the corner of my book into an esthetic photo of my feet on the beach?

Mate?

Yes?

Yes?

Have you amazed? Am I a performative man?

I think, Amelia Stacy. We did a subscriber episode recently that was a lot of fun and it has inspired a lot of input from the out loudest. We came across a substack newsletter by a writer called rich Childless Godmother. That's an unusual name, it is it is, which was just a list of low steaks, silly things that she deemed offensive. For example, she said arriving exactly on time for anything is incredibly offensive.

No, that one's incredible. Do that every day of my life, food five minutes earlier.

Late, food intolerances as opposed to allergies. She's like, nah, I find that offensive. And look, we decided to add our own and in this episode we talked about island disc goes incredibly offensive.

I'm going to one next month, I think, Stacey, I'll see myself.

Out fruit salads that are eighty percent melon. Oh yeah, I think everyone agrees. That's just highly offensive. When you order a sandwich it's not cut in half. And one of mine was when I'm eating a muffin and I believe that brown thing to be chocolate and it ends up.

Being a raising Oh yeah, jale.

So offensive, just.

A day ruiner, right. I wanted your contributions to things that you deem offensive, please, Stacy.

I have so many loose leaf tea I drink five cups a day. I don't want the admin. What are you doing?

I don't even know how you're meant to use it, Like, is it just bruins something.

You've got to put it in a little.

It's meant to be a point of meditation and contemplation in your days.

I don't like it, especially at a cafe. I'm paying you to give me admin.

Now I have to find always ends up tasting bitter because two yeah.

And you get like eleven different pieces of contraption and you're like, I look like an engineer.

And then always one bit ends up in your mouth. There's always a strike, got it? And I also don't like, speaking of cafes, the big shared tables in the middle where you get seated right next to a stranger. Don't like that either. Oh that's so fair. It annoys me. Can tuna just that it exists?

How else does one consume tuna?

I just the smell? I can't. But that's also because I sat next to a person on a plane who ate it on a plane, and I think it's more that they were personally offensive to me, and my most controversial one, I dared bring it up before I came in. I don't like people reverse parking. Wait, that's more safe and responsible. Just drive into the spot. I don't have time for you to refresh.

Okay, Stacey. So I'm a famously bad driver and I need to step up on my soapbox. Here I recently took some refresher driving last year.

You can do that.

Wow, it doesn't work very well. I could certainly try it, and they told me that you have to reverse in because it's something about the wheels and you'll get into an accident. And if you don't, that's what people told me.

But I just don't. I don't want to wait for you to reverse in.

You know what it is.

It's embarrassing to watch someone do it and you just feel cringe. And then I try and reverse in and I don't make it, so I try again, and it's like, I don't want to watch people fail.

Yeah, if you're going to do it, execute quickly and correctly perfectly.

Some people call it parking like a spy because you can make a quicker exit when you reverse it.

This has played on my views. When people win like a big award or get like a huge job, they say that they're humbled by the Yeah, that's literally the exact opposite of what it is.

It doesn't make any sense.

No, your head growing as it should, good on you. Yeah, but you're not humbling.

Yeah, you're humbled when you lose.

Yeah, when you in exactly, thank you I've got a few, and I'm going to say my most controversial one, just like Stacey did for last first one. People who talk and exercise classes in an attempt to ingratiate themselves to the instrument Jesse.

It is absolutely not. I can't talk, I can't breathe.

Like, I want to save my thoughtful questions about how to engage my core until the end of the class, so that I am a rating everyone else's time, and then the instructor and I will become very good friends and go to coffees together. Yes, but do not waste my time during the class with your performative questions.

Were just trying to get out of doing more reps, That's what it is.

Well, but the irony is the rest of the class needs to do more for your question, and I'm like, I'm holding I'm pulsing.

Coffee shops where you can't add your own sugar or worse. One time I was in London, not known for its brilliant coffee, sorry listeners listening from the British Isles, and I went to a coffee shop in Clapham and asked for sugar, and they said they didn't have any sugar. In the cafe, and.

That I called them police.

Listen, I'm prepared to have Italian's man'splaying coffee. Yeah, but no a British barista mansplaining coffee to me was a problem. The phrase pick your brain. Oh, I don't want to.

I hate it. I hate it, I completely.

I want that.

Wearing shoes inside the house. But I think that's just sort of a rule of nature. Really, it's not a controversial one. Sitting on the aisle on the bus like, I'm sorry, is this your personal limousine? Like, move across. And sometimes I will simply make a point of asking them to move when there are plenty of other seats, because I want to affirm and confirm with them that this is public transportation.

It's part of the social contract, exactly, It's.

Part of the social contract. And don't put your bag on the seat. Your bag is not precious unless it's an Hermare's burken. I don't want it on the seat, in which case likely not the bus. Final one. This is really controversial. Umbrellas. I think they're antisocial.

Oh my goodness, because.

You're just always poking people, you suddenly lose all sense of personal space. You should be wearing a raincoat.

Rank that's actually a great ada.

You've blown my mind a bit because the other thing about umbrellas is that I often do use an umbrella, but what I find is that I come inside if they don't have a place to put it. I'm also just dripping wet umbrella water, which I feel like safety.

Little plastic bag.

Yes, but sometimes I don't have it and.

It's probably choking turtles.

Actually, that's actually so true, all right.

I have a few additional ones that I wanted to add to unsolicited texts with deals on injectibles, like it's just a Tuesday and it's like, we have a great deal for you to just get so many injectibles, and I'm like, okay, that's such.

A good point. I feel like I'm never going to book a beauty treatment that I got texted about.

No, No, I feel offended. One hundred percent of the time.

I don't want my injectibles discount. Why have they on sale?

When I tell someone I have a two year old and they don't gasp and ask how I'm old enough to have a child.

Oh, every time I do it, I pause and.

I'm like mate, and they just go on with things, and I'm like, wow, okay, that's actually really rude. When it appears that someone's wearing runners with no socks, I feel a bit sick because I just think about their shoe, like their force and the sweat, and I don't like it walking into someone's bathroom after they've had a shower and it's steamy. Yeah, it feels yuck, Like it feels like I'm too close to their naked, unclean buddy.

And it also feels like the word moist is just hanging in the air.

And actually, can I add that to the list of things we are defensive?

That were And.

Sometimes it's mixed with someone's deodorant. I remember being in a hostel once and I was in somewhere in the US it's really humid and going into the communal bathroom and it was just steam and other people's deodorant, and I was like, I actually just yuck. And my last one is any physical evidence that a human being has consumed cereal?

So what do you mean?

I mean mush in the sink, Like if I got into the work kitchen and there was remnants of like corn flakes and milk stuck to a plate, Like I just think there's something about breakfast that irks me a little bit.

The Outlouders sent through some really good ones. Should we just run through a few?

Yeah.

My favorite was Natalie who wrote people that drive around with music blasting through their speakers that are attached to the outside of their cars. Yes, this happens in New Zealand. Natalie, it happens in Australia too.

I hate it.

Also, Adele, I completely agree with this one. Seeing people brushing their teeth even in movies and stuff. I don't like it, but any again, it's any evidence. It's like the glob of toothpaste.

Anything to do with being reminded that people have bodies and require sustenance.

I think all their mouths, I think. I just don't like human mouth.

And some people are very aggressive with it. I yeh, that's what it is. And I loved Natalie's. This is one that I absolutely agree with. People that use their phones to text and still have the keyboard sound on so you can hear the thumbs and the driving.

Us Barbara actually had This was my favorite because I thought it the other day. She had when people are walking along like on a footpath in a non designated area smoking The other day, I was genuinely offended by a man who was walking down I had Luna in the pram just like.

Like, is that chu legal?

I'm like, because all the second hand smoke was just like lofting. You know what, if you want to smoke, go for it. But the idea of doing it on a street like near a library where Luna was just going, I just went, that's very antisocial.

Judith, I've got a bone to pick with you. Yours was pedestrians dawdling across the intersection when there is a long line of cars waiting for them. Pick up the pace. People, No, I disagree, Judith. As a pedestrian, I am the one who was not contributing to our carbon footprint. I am the one getting out into the fresh air. And no matter how long the line of cars is, I take my time when I'm walking.

One of those is actually offended. And Judith, I'm with you on this. You're offended that it's not a light Like sometimes.

I look at it and I go, we've got some city planning.

Found some common ground for me and Judith.

Yes, what you want is for it to be a light so that the traffic works, but it is a real, real issue around train stations.

I just go and make it a lot. I'm sorry, I didn't think about that. That's true.

More out loud as.

We had so much fun with that subscriber episode. I just I have so many more. I have like a notes out that is just brimming with things that annoy me. If you're looking for something fun to listen to, you can find that subscriber episode in our show notes. After the break, is it time for the Great lock In? We discuss one unlimited out Loud access. We drop episodes every Tuesday and Thursday exclusively for Mum and MEA subscribers. Follow the link in the show notes to get us

If you are part of supet In and the Great lock In of twenty twenty five, this is how you're actually getting to Stephen sister.

It is the Great lock In season, and not a lock in where you hide yourself from world, but where you lock in on yourself for the.

Rest of the year.

You guys are going to see all over your few page of people joining the lock In.

Are we feeling inspired?

What is a lock in?

What are we talking about?

Okay?

So, according to the New York Times, we're entering the Great Locking Era. It is a term that has been popularized by social media users who are embarking on a challenge. Now, this challenge is similar to do we remember seventy five hard?

Do you remember that?

I didn't participate in it, but I remember it.

I remember criticizing it from afar.

Yes, what is seventy four?

It was seventy five days and it's like a health and fitness challenge and it was like drink this much water and read eight pages of a book and do ten thousand steps and da da da dad, like it was a mad challenge all the Winter Arc which was last year's version of this, And it's a Northern Hemisphere trend where individuals commit to setting and achieving significant personal goals in the colder months in the lead up to sort of New Year, and it's meant to counteract the instinct to hibernate.

It's dry July.

Yeah exactly, Yeah, except you just tick off everything and you become a better version of yourself in colder.

Australians are like, you're just going to try not to drink alcohol for a month. In the Northern Hemisphy, they're like, I'm going to write a book.

Yeah, in four months exactly. While we in Australia, obviously we're not entering the cooler months. It does feel like we are.

Suddenly barreling towards the end of the year.

We spoke about the term lock in a few months ago because it's a gen Z popularized sort of slang term, and it's about entering a state of deep focus and concentration aka putting your phone down for four minutes and being.

Like I'm locked in, right.

But the idea is that we are all going to hunker down for the rest of the year and do all the things that we said we set out to do in January when we were fundamentally different people. We're going to run that marathon, We're going to clean out the cupboard, we're going to get that promotion. We're going to increase our savings. Stacy, are you locking in?

Can I lock out? Get me out? Leave me on the outside. I just feel like this is like New Year's Resolutions rebranded, except we have to do them every quarter and I'm just like I've failed already. We're you know, ten days into the month. I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it, but.

I have fundamentally resent having to think about the year in terms of quarters. I am an accountant.

How about your goal, so, Stacy, have you simply achieved them all?

I don't even remember what they were even from last week. But I feel like this is part of the success society that we're in now. Like I was reading this article in medium about that and how it's seen now as the holy grail of human existence. Like you have to be striving for the next thing, getting that promotion, Like you can't just be seen to be enjoying yourself eversting coasting, Did you lock in? Jesse?

I love the idea of locking in.

I just read this and I went, I need new stationary, Like I need a new notebook.

People, what do you mean?

Like one which has like a little pitchure of you at the top and it says from the desk of Jesse Steep.

Yes, that's exactly what I mean. And maybe a personalized pen that costs a little bit too much money. Like I just feel like I was speaking to a business owner recently who was saying that in Australia, things wind down and they basically like switch off on Melbourne Cup Day. They're thinking January on Melburne Cup Day, which is November the four.

No. But this is why this lockin idea is a fundamentally Northern Hemisphere concept, because we are on the verge of silly season. So I learned recently that silly season is apparently just an Australian and British invention. It's not discussed around the world. I had to explain to my American partner what a silly season was. Americans don't have a silly season. It's just always fundamentally low key silly there.

There are four months left.

Maybe they just didn't want to see me again, but they said they were too busy.

I think we have a third of a year left. I don't know why I'm doing the same because I'm like, guys, it's basically holidays like come on, the goals can't be achieved, Amelia.

How about like are you going to run a marathon? Are you training for?

Yeah?

You know that, Jesse. That's so funny that you asked me that. I am just trying to go to exercise classes and stay silent during them. That's just my goal here.

But I feel like we're just trying to set up too many ways for ourselves to fail. Like everything feels like it's very achievement in milestone based now, Like even with parenting now, don't you feel like, at least like having little kids, everything is about leaps and milestones. And I don't think our parents' generation would have had a clue, like when we were meant to roll over, Well, it's about enrichment.

Also, you nailed it before, Jesse. I can say this because m Venom's not here right now.

Jen Z.

It has to stop coming up with phrases mean not looking at TikTok, and the.

Irony is they keep coming up with those phrases and sharing them on TikTok.

She's going to come at me because this is what you have to do.

Participants in the lock In, Locked In, Great lock In, whatever they call it challenge are encouraged to share their personal pledges online and to upload daily progress updates to hold themselves accountable. And it's like, you would get more done if you're creating less content.

Is like the general, the general, stop talking about locking down. Maybe you could get your.

Goals exactly before we go, Stacy, you are bursting with a midweek reco That's not it's blasphe for me, But.

Do you find that offensive?

You're fucked with the format? Please take the floor, Stacy.

Okay, are you both Team Conrad or Team Jeremiah?

Is this a reality show?

No, it's not.

I don't know what that is?

Okay, good. So, depending on where the listeners sit, can either hear them screaming at their phone right now telling me that they are Team Conrad, which is the correct answer, FYI, or they're like you two and look very confused.

Is this Twilight?

No, it's kind of the new iteration of Twilight. Yes. So what I'm talking about is the show called the Summer I turned pretty okay.

I keep seeing the abbreviation of this, which is like six, like, what are we It's like to.

Submer it and I'm going, what are we talking about?

You? Yes, so this show is like a teen drama. Like, make no mistake, I'm not meant to be watching it. But all millennial women at the moment that I seem to have conversations with are saying to me, are you watching the Summer I Turn pretty? I'm catching up on the Summer I turn pretty. It has hit fever pitch.

Because I thought this wasn't a new show. I thought people were talking about this a few years ago.

No, so it's in the third season now. The finale is next week. But I want you to hear it. I want you to hear what this show sounds like, just to get the vibe.

My family spends every summer in Cousins Beach with my mom's best friend and her two sons and Jeremiah. They've always seen me as a little kid, but this summer, so you go later, it's different. Damn you work hot, Stop flirting with my sister.

Do you want to be with him? Be with you is all I've ever worn it. Okay, it's great, be with me.

Then I watched an episode of this a few years ago. I remember they go to a beach. She's like and everyone's like, Wow, you've turned into a woman.

I'm like, eh, it's like that classic you took your glasses off and suddenly you're hot. Yeah, but she turned sixteen. They go to Cousins Beach in the Hamptons in this story, and her family holidays every year with the Fisher family. So this Conrad and Jeremiah are the brothers who are around her age as well as her own brother. So the main character is Isabelle Conklin. So they nickname her Belly

So this is like the handreds are so fancy? Is that like rich people? Drama? Like is that the vibe?

So the Fisher family is rich, but Belly's family is not. They are just friends of this family, so like swept into this world every summer and spend all of this time with them. And look, the dialogue's not great, the plot pretty unbelievable. The two brothers would just go so hard over one one family friend a bit weir, but you won't care because it's like a version of the OC Like did you watch the Okay, it gives you that like heartsick, like excited feeling team, I've.

Got an older reference. Is it like Dawson's Creek?

Exactly? That was the other one I was going to reference. Is Dawson's Creek. It is exactly like that. Like it's corny, you won't care, You'll love it.

Is it on Netflix?

No on Amazon Prime, Amazon Prime And across the city, across Sydney, multiple pubs are shutting down on Wednesday nights to hold these viewing parties. Yeah.

Dropping once a week at the moment, yeah, once a week.

That's why I was really escapist and lovely. Maybe what I'll lock in on?

Yeah, you should lock in on binging this by next Wednesday so you can watch the finale.

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