Alex doesn't care about Michael's feelings when he brings in a barleywine and a Flander's red. Michael doesn't care about Alex's feelings when he tries to flip a BBT and puts a price on Diddy. Stephen brings in a beer as voted on by the Patreon and momentarily struggles with going back to being an authoritarian. Jason Statham won't stop reminding everyone that he's almost six feet tall. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/Do...
Nov 05, 2020•2 hr 3 min•Ep. 123
Show your feet, give me something pastry to drink. For this year's annual Halloween episode The Malty Boyz™ bend the knee for the pastryarchy for a pastry themed Bottleshare. Before they get to that, Alex brings in a treat in the form of Side Project's ode to Gabe Fletcher. In the Beer News, $100 six-packs of lager produced by Napa wine wunderkind are consumed while discussing artisanal fireworks. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Insta...
Oct 29, 2020•2 hr 3 min•Ep. 122
The Jevne juice is flowing as The Malty Boyz™ drink a V.S.O.A. from Forager Brewery as voted on by the listeners. Then it's Follow Up Madness in the Beer News as they check in on The Jester King Protestor as she sets her sights on another Texas brewery, Green Flash and Alpine Beer Company come full circle, Goose Island break from Black Friday traditions, and the Bernie Brewer chalet is now the foamiest date spot in town! A coincidental Bottle Share is met with mix reviews. Alex talks about his h...
Oct 22, 2020•1 hr 53 min•Ep. 121
Say, man, you got some rye? It'd be a lot cooler if you did. That's what I love about these Sazerac Rye 18-Year-Old Buffalo Trace Antique Collection bottles, man. I get older, they stay the same age. Let me tell you what these ryes are packin' right here, all right. We got 100% rye grain, uncut Old Potrero, single barrel, 124 proof, some Rittenhouse bottled-in-bond, straight rye, and baby Saz. We're talkin' some fuckin' muscle. Because you oughta dump those two geeks you got in the car with you ...
Oct 15, 2020•1 hr 55 min•Ep. 120
Scab-a-de-doo-ba-ba Revolution Brewing Sanctuary 13 da-ba-dee-doo-skt-skt Lakefront Brewery Beer Line Barley Wine duh-doo-bum-bum-bum-jibbidy-bap Planters collab with Natural Light doobie-biddy-doo Wolverine boots collab with Pappy Van Winkle zabba-dee-doo Rodenbach bap-bapbadap-bapdadap Spencer Brewery Trappist beer dabba-dee-doo-ziggidy-zop... go vote, don't do heroin. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Ins...
Oct 08, 2020•1 hr 47 min•Ep. 119
Make sure your vapes are fully charged for this batch. You're going to stan so hard for all the crispy boys the Malty Boyz™ put down that you'll be dabbing for a week, king! Pass the cans of Wayfinder Beer, Burial Brewing, Tired Hands, and Three Weavers and let me get my crisp on, brah! The Beer News has, like, lawsuits, macro shit, and soft drug use...pssh, whatevs. CRISPY BOYS 4 LIFE! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/Do...
Oct 01, 2020•1 hr 44 min•Ep. 118
If you give Craft Beer Kevin a smooch he'll ask for a whole orgy slathered in generic ranch dressing. This is the tale of Alex when he unboxed Modern Times' newest boxed set of barrel-aged beers. He also brings in some old money oxi juice. Michael goes full tourist. Stephen returns to the discount rack. In the Beer News, Jester King gets accused of being Satanist, Red Lobster teams up with Mountain Dew, and Taco Bell releases wine. Cool cool cool. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content...
Sep 24, 2020•2 hr 3 min•Ep. 117
The Malty Boyz™ become The Malty Yinzerz™ in this Pennsylvania episode! Drinking beers from PA breweries that haven't been featured on the show before, The Malty Yinzerz™ put their sweet lips on beers from Yuengling, Human Robot Brewery, Bullfrog Brewery, and Selin's Grove Brewing. In the Beer News, Fair State Co-op recognizes their employee union, pool parties draw the wrong type of attention, Stone keeps on doing Stone things, and a tear is shed for Orval. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclus...
Sep 17, 2020•1 hr 59 min•Ep. 116
Alex orders a half-decade old Xyauyù barleywine from Italy brewed with tobacco. Was it worth the price and wait? Michael makes the homer pick with a tasty treat from Highland Park Brewing. Stephen talks about his serendipity meet cute moment but with his bottle share beer. In the Beer News, union busting, NASCAR champion Michael Waltrip opens a brewery, and Michael discusses his fantasy football draft which he's drafting while recording. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon....
Sep 10, 2020•2 hr 13 min•Ep. 115
The Malty Boyz™ take a sneak peak at what Brad Clark's newest project, Private Press, is offering. Then they open up some St. Louis juice from regular ol' Perennial Artisan Ales. MA! Big Jim has the keys to the Expresso and is driving and rampaging all over the Beer News! He's looking through his old Hamm's receipts, buying beer for dogs, and trying to put out fires with Bud Light! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDri...
Sep 03, 2020•2 hr•Ep. 114
It's been 36 weeks since the last Barley Battle and the responsibility to make the malty sacrifices to Lord Maris were left in Michael's hands. Now his smooth, soft hands are covered in sticky, barrel-aged repentance! And boy did he repent as Michael brings in some bangers for this special Barleywine is Life episode. In the Beer News, Alex finally forks over a whole dollar to read a Wall Street Journal article, forbidden Hamm's was discovered in the walls of a Walla Walla library, and Constellat...
Aug 27, 2020•1 hr 43 min•Ep. 113
Alex brings in some fabled classics from Ithaca Beer Company and Cigar City Brewing. In the Beer News, a Canadian brewery gets lost in translation and Creature Comforts set their sights on Los Angeles. Alex puts Stephen and Michael through a round of Goose It or Loose It with the 2020 Goose Island Bourbon County line-up. The Malty Boyz™ also announce they're going to Hersey Park... someday. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.co...
Aug 20, 2020•1 hr 52 min•Ep. 112
Rounding out this Beers of Fame trilogy, the Malty Boyz™ head to the United Kingdom to learn about the "real ale" movement, cookie cutter pubs, drinking laws in Ireland, and horses. The Beer News follows up on Side Project's anti-counterfeit measures, the new face of mustard beer, and more Stone drama. Plus, Topo Chico gets into the hard seltzer game and Michael expresses his feelings about cask beers. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com ...
Aug 13, 2020•1 hr 56 min•Ep. 111
Next stop for this old money train, the Malty Boyz™ head to Germany to drink more classics from the Beer Advocate Beers of Fame list. In this episode they tick Weihenstephan Hefe, Schenider Weiess Edelweiss, Ayinger Brauweiss, and Samichlaus Classic. In the Beer News, Stone founder Greg Koch claps back, beer gets brewed using mustard, and a retirement home starts homebrewing. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeer...
Aug 06, 2020•1 hr 36 min•Ep. 110
Take a trip down old money lane as The Malty Boyz™ revisit BeerAdvocate's Beers of Fame list starting with Belgian beers. In this episode they tick Saison Dupont, Westmalle, Piraat, and Trappist Achel. In the Beer News, BeerAdvocate gets hacked, Stone sues everyone, and Stephen realizes he hasn't had a proper meal in months. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB Twitter.com/DontDrink...
Jul 30, 2020•1 hr 53 min•Ep. 109
What happEns when Gabe Fletcher releases his first pAstry stout? Why is Tavour hiring lizard people to create Untappd accounTs? Who's mAking all these fruited Berliner cans explode? Who's causing COVID to jump state lines? Why are these labels upSide down? What caused a "lapse in judgement" in Connecticut? Put on your tin foil hat and liSten to The Malty Boyz™ try to make sense of it all. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/...
Jul 23, 2020•1 hr 59 min•Ep. 108
There were adjuncts in any direction, at any release. If not across the Everglades, then up the Pacific Northwest or down the Mighty Mississippi to Decorah or St. Louis... you could strike waxed bottles anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were drinking was right, that we were winning. There they go. Three of Lord Maris' own prototypes. High-powered mutants of some kind never even considered for mass consumption. So now, more than 500 beers later, you can go up on a s...
Jul 16, 2020•1 hr 37 min•Ep. 107
In this batch, Michael and Stephen reveal that being in the LA comedy scene is a detriment to finding romantic relationships. Don't cringe for them as they have already cringed a thousand tears into their dakimakuras. In Beer News, someone's counterfeiting Side Project beers, Constellation Brands Ventures invest 10% of what they paid for Ballast Point into minority owned breweries, and a 113-year-old New Orleans brewery changes their name in light of systemic social issues. Head to our Patreon f...
Jul 09, 2020•1 hr 50 min•Ep. 106
In this episode, The Malty Boyz™ drink a beer named after Mister Maraschino, Michael brings in a California classic IPA, Stephen brings in a beer from a New England brewery based in Maine, Alex brings in barrel-aged new money beer from an old money brewery, and all of them are mad about systematic racism. Is this the new normal for the The Malty Boyz™? I dunno, do triple IPAs turn into barleywine? The answer is: Yes! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer Don...
Jul 02, 2020•1 hr 49 min•Ep. 105
On this very special two-year anniversary episode The Malty Boyz™ sought out 13 of the best Hazy IPAs and threw them into a Malt Madness tournament to see who would emerge as the first ever Hazy Cup Champion! Representing the Hollandaise Conference are Bissell Brothers, Monkish, Narrow Gauge, Tree House, Trillium, and Weldworks! Representing the Sunny D Conference are Great Notion, Hill Farmstead, Old Nation, Other Half, and Parish with Cellarmaker and Tired Hands competing for the final Wild Ca...
Jun 25, 2020•2 hr 33 min•Ep. 104
The Malty Boyz™ set off to explore the wild world of bourbon with a blind tasting showdown at the Malty Corral. Find out what they bring to the table when there are no price or proof limits. In the Beer News, Fantôme reopens, Kona Brewing causes problems with the AB InBev and Craft Brew Alliance merger, and Michigan makes changes to open container laws. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCou...
Jun 18, 2020•1 hr 46 min•Ep. 103
Finally, Flanders Red has come back to Malt Couture! If you don't like it then you can take your barleybobs and hype cans, turn 'em sum-bitches sideways, and stick 'em straight up your pastry stout asses! In the Beer News, Minnesota breweries prove to be the people's champ during a time of social change while a Georgia based brewery proves to be a bunch of jabronis. https://www.communityjusticeexchange.org/nbfn-directory
Jun 11, 2020•1 hr 39 min•Ep. 102
The Malty Boyz™ head off on a quest to scour their local liquor stores for the oldest shelf turd in the land. What lightstruck treasures will they dig up? In the Beer News, Cantillon sold in mason jars, Peyton Manning buys a golf course, and Post Malone gets into the rose gamé. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB Twitter.com/DontDrinkBeer DDBquestions@gmail.com...
Jun 04, 2020•1 hr 42 min•Ep. 101
It's Malt Madness for Batch 100! 12 beers enter but only one can leave with The Malty Cup! For this monumental episode, Alex, Michael, and Stephen each submitted four beers with the stipulation that they all must be 10% ABV or higher and barrel-aged for a blind tasting kumite. Who will emerge victorious in this malt bath of chaos? Plus, some Beer News and stuff. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.co...
May 28, 2020•2 hr 38 min•Ep. 100
After eight weeks of quarantine, the Malty Boyz™ are out of fresh(ish) options and resort to plumbing the depths of their linen closets for the oldest beer they have. What aged treasures be lurking behind ye bath towels and bulk purchased dryer sheets? In the Beer News, a questionable beer society is launched in Temecula, a Maine brewery goes full yokel, and a SNL story leads to a deep dive into LA's black box comedy theater scene. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/Do...
May 21, 2020•1 hr 59 min•Ep. 99
The Malty Boyz™ square off in a three-way battle of brains, brawn, and intestinal fortitude. What happens when each Malty Boys is tasked with taking down a six pack while competing five malty challenges? Who has the fastest chug? Who has the strongest gag reflex? Who's the most in tune with Gen Z? Who's the King of Geography? Who can eat the most cold raviolis? All these questions will be answered and more in this showdown for the ages! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.c...
May 14, 2020•2 hr 34 min•Ep. 98
The Malty Boyz™ drink local when they order beer from the closest operating brewery to where they live. Do they start getting territorial once the Bottleshare starts? Are they blowing up spots that would otherwise remain secret? In the Beer News, CO2 supplies run low, Maui brewing is under investigation, and more art theft! Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB Twitter.com/DontDrinkB...
May 07, 2020•2 hr 9 min•Ep. 97
So it's come to this: a malt liquor episode. The Malty Boyz™ head to the corner store and pick out some thiccc cans and bottles of malt liquor for each other. They also discuss how they spent their stimulus checks. In Beer News, a heist goes down in Anaheim, Coors helps out an old lady with a timeless problem, and 450 North steps on another rake. Head to our Patreon for weekly exclusive content! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB...
Apr 30, 2020•1 hr 47 min•Ep. 96
Stephen's favorite holiday rolls around but this time it's during a pandemic. How will the Malty Boyz cope with recording remotely? How high does Stephen get? Michael puts a sober Alex and a high Stephen through the ringer for a round of "California Weed Store or Pennsylvania Brewery?" Head to our Patreon for weekly Small Batch episodes! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB Twitter.com/DontDrinkBeer DDBquestions@gmail.com...
Apr 23, 2020•1 hr 35 min•Ep. 95
In this last recording before the quarantine times started a 5-star review stumps Alex, Michael recounts being a midwife for dogs, and Stephen's teeth hurt. In the Beer News, old dumb beer laws become new apocalyptic beer laws, Toronado Seattle shutters, and some breweries attempt terrible marketing tactics during these trying times. Head to our Patreon for weekly Small Batch episodes! Patreon.com/DontDrinkBeer DontDrinkBeer.com Instagram.com/DontDrinkBeers Instagram.com/MaltCoutureDDB Twitter.c...
Apr 16, 2020•1 hr 43 min•Ep. 94
