Kinky Q&A

You're listening to the loving BDSM podcast episode 419. A confused Kayla Lords here with the one, the only, the what the fuck was that John Brownstone? I'll explain later. Okay. Good. He he cued me in to start speaking weirdly, and and I nope. Nope. Didn't know about that. Anyway, that's what we're here for. This week, we asked Instagram to ask us anything, and now we're gonna answer some of those questions. Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast. If this is your first time listening, glad to have

you. You're back for another week, welcome back. Loving BDSM is produced every Monday Friday for your kinky pleasure in education, and show notes are found at lovingbdsm.net. Come back often and feel free to add the podcast to your favorite podcast app. You can also follow the show on FetLife at loving BDSM PC on Instagram and technically threads at that handle I will forever fucking hate, loving d s and the number 1. So that's at loving

d s one. Or on YouTube at youtube.com/loving BDSM where you can watch us livestream the podcast every Wednesday. All links are in the show notes. A big thanks as always to our kinky patrons over on Patreon, including our newest peeps. We are able to keep being weirdos on the Internet, in large part to our kinky community on Patreon. We are grateful for every fuck I wanna

be. If you'd like to join our kinky community and get access to extra content and a Discord server with a group of super cool, super nice, super chill kinksters, you can do that. Join us at patreon.com/kaylallords. That's patreon.com/kaylallords or use the link in the show notes. Okay. Before we get into the questions, a very simple announcement. It's literally the same as last week. All of our Etsy shops are on sale. There's sales through the end of the year.

If you want some kinky stuff, the like workbooks and coloring books and stickers and whatever, loving BDSM Etsy shop. If you are a reader and love little bookish things, from stickers to tote bag tote bags to whatever, my Etsy shop book dreams. If you are looking for gifts and you like wood and you like things that are handmade, JB's, Etsy shop, the Wood Dom. Every everything's on sale. Yep. So and that'll that'll keep being true. Next week,

the livestream will be right before Thanksgiving. We will talk about Black Friday deals, not just ours, but, like, places that we're like, no. No. No. Really go check them out. We'll we'll do a little bit of that. But, yeah, just for right now, we're sponsoring us because I like to pay the mortgage. Yeah. And and, actually, I just received and am now in possession of a candle wax melter so that I can make more candles faster for the kinkery, and I'm so excited. So excited.

I don't have to do a double boiler with a little pour thingy or manage to make, like, 10 at a time. I I hope it works as well for you as as it did in the reel that I saw it in. And I did try to do my research and check yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Anyway, anyway, we're gonna answer questions. So over on Instagram, I basically said ask us anything, and people did. Uh-oh. Okay. So we did get a lot. We're not gonna be able to answer them all. So not even gonna try, but let's see what

we can get through. And so these questions tend to be about just about kink in general, but some of them are specific to us. So we'll just we'll just do the thing. What actually goes into planning a scene and how do you do it? Well, you plan the scene. You think about what you wanna do. You think about you have to know what your options are though. True. You gotta, like, do what you can do. You you have to know the person that you're you're impacting. Yeah. Yes. If if impact play is what you

wanna do. Right. Really does it also starts with, well, what do you like to do? What do you wanna try? What have you done before? What is interesting to you? Then, yeah, what is your partner like? Right. Or not like? What are y'all's mutual kinks? Mhmm. Does it require equipment? Can you do it with stuff around your house or your hand? Spanking scenes are kind of the easiest, assuming you have a hand. You're good. Mhmm.

But, yeah, the planning of it. Yeah. I mean, the the planning I mean, you can make a scene as as simple or as elaborate Right. As you want. Okay? You know, I was at the woodshed one night and there was an older couple on one of the spanking benches, and he was just for about half hour, 45 minutes, just, like, lightly flogging her. Mhmm. And and they were having a blast. And I think that's where people get themselves messed up. Scene implies, role play implies, theatrics.

Yeah, you can. You can get real real, like, intricate. You could have dialogue. Not my jam, but go for it. But really, it's the kink thing you're doing together. Right. I mean, then then another time I was there, there was a dom, he was dressed up as a, circus ringmaster. And his partner was dressed as a unicorn. Oh my God, that's so funny. Kingsters are creative fuckers, is all I'm saying.

Yep. Very creative. Yep. And and, you know, yeah, you you you need you need to think about about the thing, and I I I think one of the big things that's overlooked a lot in, plan planning, any scene are the expectations. What are your expectations? What are your partner's expectations? Trying to get out of it? Right. Right. Yeah. What do you wanna experience? Mhmm. And that go that's goes beyond the logistics of I want you to spank me with your hand. I want you to use a

flogger. I want blah blah blah. It's I want to feel this way. I want to experience this sensation. I'm looking for stress relief. I'm looking for orgasms. I'm looking for denial. I'm looking for pain. Like, what are you looking for? I mean, you know, there there were times, even with you, you know, you wanted to be spanked until you cried Yeah. Because you needed that release. And other times, you just wanted to be spanked just to kinda, you know, let go and float. I want the deep

tissue massage kind of impact Yeah. So I can just melt. That's what that's what I'm craving right now. Mhmm. But it scene planning starts like, it's the very first step is figuring out what you're curious about or into. Lola agrees. Agrees. Okay. Yeah. But, yeah, I I do think people make it more complicated than it is. Yeah. And it can be complex, and there's nothing wrong

with that. Mhmm. But if you've never seen before in your life, just pick a kink activity that you either know you like or you would like to try to see if you like that, is compatible with a partner. And then part of part of scene planning is you gotta go learn how to do kinks, though. Like, you gotta have been watching videos, going to workshops, doing demos, reading books, listening to podcasts, like, whatever. However you learn, you have to go do that part first.

Some are easy. Spanking a person, hand, ass, kinda done. But flogging, that's there's some technique to that. I'm thinking of Rah Rah here at needle play. Please don't go try that till you've learned from somebody who knows what they're doing. Right? So Yeah. True. Okay. Next question. Okay. What is our current coffee order when we're ordering? Like, when we're out in public and we're getting coffee. I I've been leaning towards, cold brew. Mhmm. We've been, hitting Dunkin'

A lot. A lot, fairly regularly when we when we do go out for coffee right now. And, I've kinda taken a liking with their with their cold brew and, you know, a little cream in there and some mocha syrup. The yes. No. Not yesterday. A few days ago, we we got Dunkin', and you got the peppermint mocha cold brew with sweet cold foam on top. And that was very good. Mhmm. Yeah. You were making noises as you were drinking it when we were going down the road. I I was having cough cough orgasm. I

mean, I'm not, you know yeah. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna hide it. You were having a moment. You were having a moment. My current coffee order so I prefer cold brew as well, but I'm a broke bitch, so it's usually Dunkin' iced coffee. And so then it's iced coffee with cream, and right now, pumpkin syrup or whatever swirl, whatever they call it. When that goes away, I'll go back to butter pecan. Like, the day Dunkin' added butter pecan as a sweet flavor to their, like, steady menu,

I'm so happy. But, yeah, if there's extra cash, then I'm gonna get cold brew. Or if I've got points, I'll get a cold brew. And no I there's only really one place I like to get espresso drinks from, and that's a really special treat. It's a local place. And if we go in, even when we don't get the, like, the biggest size, it's still a $15 order between the 2 of us. Oh, yeah. So it's a very infrequent treat. And it's the only place I wanna get espresso drink from. But they the

the their coffee is Mhmm. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep. Wonderful. Yep. Mhmm. But, yeah, we're we're kinda simple these days. Yeah. And that's okay. We don't really get a lot of coffee out right now. Not right. We haven't for a while. I've, I I, in mass quantities, make cold brew at home. So much. Sometimes the fridge is just like On top of the fridge. Yeah. I can feel a sneeze coming on. I am so sorry. That's gonna hit right when I least

expect it. That's not helpful. Okay. What are both of our favorite adult toys currently? I would have to say, for me, probably the the WeVibe bond. That's prostate massager. Right? No. No. Is it cock ring? That's the that's the cock ring. Okay. The vector. Vector is the prostate. Is the is the prostate. Yeah. But the cock ring is your is it a vibrating one? Yes. Are you able to feel the vibrates? Oh, yeah. Okay.

I mean, I guess I shouldn't have had to ask that because if I knew if it was being used on me or with me, I would have known that. So clearly, he can feel whatever vibrations. That that's it for you. I don't currently have a favorite. I did just, try 2 vibrators. 1 from WeVibe, 1 from Womanizer. Different styles than they usually have, which is very exciting. I have things I like and dislike about both, but I have not played with sex toys prior to these 2 in

a very long time. Minute for you. Yeah. In probably a year or more. So I don't currently have a favorite. Now if we're gonna talk about kink toys, I don't other than the kinkery, I don't have a specific one specific toy, but I have a specific type. Like, floggers that have, like, the suede or the soft leather strands, are is my favorite. Yeah. Yeah. If you ever learned how to make a flogger, I would be like, oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I would not be able to be contained.

Okay. And next question. Okay. I, switch male, wanna wear a chastity cage. How do I bring it up to my partner, switch female? Both switches. Talk to them? You know, I think it depends on how your dynamic is. You and I negotiate openly all the time. If one of us has a thought, we just say it. Yeah. Other folks might have, like, something more structured. So if you have that structured time, like, set it up. Right. You know, but, yeah, you you you're gonna have to talk about it one way

or another. You you're gonna have to let it be known, you know, that this is what you want. You know, and and, you know, don't go in all hot, like, put the zombie, lock me up. Right. Right. You know, kind of ease into it, you know, maybe like, hey, have you ever heard about, male chastity devices? Like, what do you think about chastity cages? What do you think about being a key holder? Yeah. Yeah. And that's the other

thing. Make sure you're clear on what you're asking for your partner to do and to participate. Do you just want them to know that you're doing it, and so, you know, your junk won't be as accessible? Do you want them to literally be the key holder and in charge of when this thing comes off or gets put back on? Like, think very clearly about what you're looking for, and then the conversation needs to be that negotiation between here's what my ideal world looks like, and then your

partner gets the opportunity to go, okay. I don't wanna do that, but I could do this. We could try that. Blah blah blah. And then if they're not interested in participating, I know plenty of, people who will just wear a a cock cage because they like wearing it. They like the denial for themselves. So that would always be an option if your partner's not really down for, you know, managing your penis for you. Okay? I mean, if they are down for it,

cool. Have fun. But yeah. Okay. I'm not sure I understand exactly what they're asking for here, so maybe you will and maybe if I say it out loud, I'll go, oh, I know what they mean now. The question is, do you use alter egos? I find them useful, but at the same time, it gives me confusion and even competition inside. So, like Okay. Yeah. I do. Okay. Like, I I know this mistress. Okay? She has her mistress persona. Mhmm. But then, she has an alter ego Mhmm. That is

a male persona. Oh, wow. Okay. Okay. So I I I think that's kinda where they're Okay. Where they're in the parking. In my everyday life, I'm legal name. In my kink life, I'm, you know, a little bit different than my everyday life. Yeah. I mean that that's a simplistic way of looking at it. You know, yeah. We we have our vanilla lives and our alter ego or or, you know, whichever vice versa. But, you know, yeah. I I think I believe that's what they're they're coming at.

We no. We've never really done any kind of play like that. No. And I don't I don't internalize it that way. The the name Kayla Lords is a pseudonym, and it has become my kink name, but it's just another it's the the kink side of myself, not an alter ego that I internalize in any sort of way. Mhmm. Where I don't that it's not is not the same thing, but that is too close to role play for me because now I gotta be somebody. And that's and that's the thing with you.

Yeah. That That's never gonna happen. For you, the role play is just not ever gonna happen. No. No. Oh my god. No. No. Whatever the opposite of a kink or fetish is, that. It's a that. It's a that for me. That's a hard limit for you. Oh, my god. It gives me a feeling. I don't like it. But, you know, the So you were never a theater kid? Oh, god. No. Oh, god. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I was a band kid who happened to play an instrument that put me 3 rows back.

And marching band kid with a helmet hat thing on where you could barely see my face. Oh, no. Oh, no. No. Not a theater kid. Anyway, you know, I if the idea of an alter ego is no longer helpful to you, is it something that you can put aside, put down, give a rest for a while? Because if if that alter ego is creating something within you where you you were literally, like, your own internal world is, like, I I feel competitive. I feel I don't feel good about myself. I I don't

is it helpful anymore to do? And I I could never answer that for anybody, but it does make sense that you will have alter egos because sometimes you have things you wanna do that can seem so, you know, far apart from one another. You just create, you know, a different persona for each one, and I respect that. I just definitely not my thing. I'm here. We're gonna let JB bring Lola back in.

She's been very vocal today. I don't I didn't I won't have to edit out as much in Monday's episode as I thought I would, but you hear Lola in that one too. Okay. What are some good first steps for someone new to kink to explore if they're single? There's as many first steps, potential Yeah. Opportunities as there are, like, things on planet Earth so that I I for me, I would I think I would have to say for someone who's single and and fairly new to kink, learn.

In whatever way you like to learn. Whatever way you like to learn, whatever you think you might be interested in, even in some things you you may not be interested in, you may just explore them to find, you know, whether you like them or or you don't. But learn learn everything you can about what you can. Yep. I mean, there's nothing wrong with by yourself, single single kinkster, taking the, doing a BDSM checklist by yourself. They're geared often towards But they don't like, you use them on

your own and then their conversation starts. So go through a list and go Yep. I don't even know what that is. So maybe that means you're just not worried about learning about it now. Maybe you're like, oh, then I'm gonna add that to my research list. Right? Like, do that. Yep. Yeah. If you're a video watcher, YouTube is they're kinksters aren't there. If you're a podcast listener, if you're a reader

Mhmm. Like, what whatever If if if you're lucky enough, if you live in an area where there are workshops or or, you know, different things like that, those are fantastic to attend. A lot of times you can, you know, actually do some hands on. Right. Because the more you learn about what you're into and how things can can be done, then that gives you a direction for exploring beyond the theoretical and into the physical Mhmm. In whatever way

that might work for you. But, yeah, the there's no bad time to learn about kink if you're into it and interested. But when you are single and you're not actively looking for a partner, this is a great time. Just just focus on you Yep. And what you're into and how other people are doing things and take in what resonates

and reject the stuff that doesn't. And, you know, that means, ideally, by the time you're either ready to meet somebody or you just happen to meet somebody, you are able to talk about your boundaries, your wants, your needs, your things you're curious about, and and you're more educated on it. And so it's harder, not impossible, but harder for, you know, predatory bullshit

because you're aware. Mhmm. I think this is a long distance question because it says, as a Dom, that is far I'm gonna go with away. How do I help my sub with sub drop? That's that's kind of tough, especially if you're in different time zones. You plan for it though. But you but you plan. Yeah. I mean, we were in different time zones and and that's what we

did. We we planned for it And we were lucky enough that we were able to plan for it, and that we were able to create a a pretty set schedule that we could, you know, reach out to one another. You know, as far as helping them with with, SubDrop, you know, be be open to text messaging or phone calls. Yep. Or face to FaceTime or whatever your version is. FaceTime or Zoom, any You know, I've a lot of people want to fix or prevent drop for dom or

sub completely. Mhmm. I've I've never heard of a thing that sounds valid that could actually prevent it. Yeah. All you can kind of do is mitigate it. So part of that is knowing that it's a possibility. The very beginning, I was shocked the few times I went through drop because I did until I understood what was happening. I was like, what is wrong with me? So you have to have an understanding that it can happen. If you've already experienced it before, your partner already experienced it before,

1, it can feel different each time. But 2, how like, is it an emotional thing or is it a physical thing or is it both? Because what you prepare for is determined by how you typically experience drop. I have gotten it all 3. It's been an emotional drop. It's been a physical drop. It's been a both. And I thought I was losing my mind that time because I was like, I am both sad and I have the flu. What is happening? It's kind if you don't know what it is, it's Right. Kinda like what's going on. You

know, this is a little scary. We know it just came on so quick. So then you have to think about comfort items. What comforts me when I'm sad? What what makes me feel better when my body doesn't feel good? And you you try you do your best to plan so you have the things you need that will help you feel good. As a partner helping your partner through drop from a distance, it's it's connection. It's talking about it. It's you and I did this many times and it wasn't even through drop.

We would be on the phone or connected in some way. We were just breathing to one another. I wasn't even neither of us was talking, but we were existing there at the same time. And that can be comforting. So, you know, the ideally, you talk about it

out outside of it happening. Like, especially if you know that a possibility and you've gotten you know, you or your partner have gone through it, you talk about what did it feel like, what do you think would be helpful, what can we plan for, and then all that is gonna do is is make it feel maybe a little less shitty until it passes. Yeah. But, yeah, that's kind of the sort of the best I've ever heard or found that you can do. Mhmm. So

next question. These are kinda going quick, so this is interesting. I I'm gonna read the question, but that's not actually the question I wanna answer and wait till you hear. Where would you recommend that beginner subs, newbie baby subs, start finding a dom? Where where should baby subs go to find themselves a dom? Can I be a bitch? Baby subs? I'm so happy that you've figured submissive. The first thing I want you to

do is not go find a dog. I don't want that to be the thing you do as a newbie baby sub. It's not. I want you to go learn something. I want you to do a BDSM checklist. I want you to figure your shit out. Right. A little bit. Now, you don't have to know everything, but a little bit. Enough that you will be safe on, you know Oh, my god, please. Understand some of the things that you like, understand things you don't like, know what your

boundaries and hard limits are. Right. And then the dissatisfying answer to the actual question being asked, wherever people are, there are kinky people. So are you do you wanna meet somebody online? Do you wanna meet them in person? In person, find in person community. Go to a much. You know? Get get involved with the local community if you feel comfortable doing that. If that's not an option for you or that's not what you wanna do, then you go online

and you really can find kinksters everywhere. Mhmm. They're harder to find on non kink spaces, on in non kink spaces, but they're there. You can go to FetLife, but that's another reason I don't I don't want beginner baby subs worried about finding a dom. Because you go to FetLife and you don't know any better, it is very easy for the predators to be like, oh, look, fresh meat.

But, yeah, it people want there to be this magic place where, like, all the doms are housed waiting to be found by single subs, or all the subs live waiting to be found by, you know, dom no. Wherever people are, that's where kinky people are. If you're gonna try and find a part a kink partner in a non kink space, you have to be very intentional and you have to, you know, put out the signals and signs that, hey. I am kinky looking for a kinky partner.

Or you go to kink spaces, and I want you to be a little bit more educated about how to navigate kink before you worry about getting a partner, especially in those spaces. Yeah. Lecture over. Lecture over. Some of these questions kind of relate to one another and had I been a better planner, I could have put them all together. So we've answered this before. We've answered many of these before. That's okay. This one is similar to our one of our top questions.

But how do you come up with ideas for scenes or new kinks or things you wanna try? It's kind of the same way as anything else. What is interesting? Right. That's where being in on, kink spaces, online or in person, is so valuable because you will see somebody talking about something or doing something and you'll go, oh, I didn't even know that thing existed. And if it resonates with you, you'll be like, oh, maybe I should go learn more. Maybe I need to do some googling. Maybe

I need to go to a workshop. And then the the ideas can start to flow because you're being inspired by the very real experiences around you. But, yeah, it it's more of a going to learn about the things that kind of interest you and seeing so we could say spanking. We could say impact play. We could say paddles. We're unpicking impact play because that's our fave. That that one word or that little phrase impact play means about

50, 11000000 things. Right? Yeah. So a thing that sounds interesting to you will conjure up probably one image in your head when you're new and and haven't, you know, learned about something yet. And you'll go, oh, yeah. Maybe I'm kind of into that, but then you'll start learning. Videos, podcasts, works like, whatever, online education, like, however you're

gonna learn. And you'll go, oh, this topic is clearly deeper than I knew it was, and now you have almost an infinite number of ways to explore that thing you thought of in one turn. So the more you go learn and experience and witness and hear from and talk to people about what they're doing, the more you're inspired, the more you go, oh, that's a thing I never heard of. That kind of intrigues me. Let me go learn. Let me go try. And next thing you know, you've got a a new king to try, a new

scene to try. Mhmm. Mhmm. Mhmm. It's the very, boring but Yeah. I I knew. Kind of like the answer. You know? It's why, you know, man, I I can feel the eye rolls from some folks when we talk about community and and why we think community is so important. There's many reasons community in whatever form you have it in is important, but the seeing all the ways that things can be done Mhmm. Is huge. Yeah. Anything you would add? Nope. Mm-mm.

Okay. This will be the last one from this collection, and this has gone so quick that I think we'll be able to take some from the live stream Okay. Audience. So that'll be fun. How do I approach kink with a spouse that does not

understand it? Carefully? Yeah. Yeah. Carefully. You know, unfortunately, I mean, you can you can if if it's a matter of not understanding, you know, you you can give them articles to read, blog, you know, blog posts, books, anything like that, you know, that you can, that that you can do to help, you know, gain some understanding. Now if it's just a matter of the fact that you're kinky, and they don't understand it and don't want it, you know, then, unfortunately, there's nothing you can

do. You can't make your partner want to be kinky for you or want to try it. You can create an environment where they can decide for themselves that they maybe become more comfortable with the idea over time. Slowly, they're willing to maybe look into it. Maybe they're willing to look into it just enough to support your interest. It does depend a lot on what kind of

relationship you have with your spouse. If it's a contentious one where they don't usually like the things you like or if it's something they dislike or don't know about, it's like they shut down and shut it off, and they're just really not interested. If anything, then that's gonna translate to kink if they're not into it. Right. Now I I know for me early on, you know, obviously, coming into the the, lifestyle, I there were a lot of things I did not know, a lot of things I didn't understand.

And what helped me was attending a munch, and meeting folks, and and just talking to them. They them telling me about their experiences, how how kink impacts them, what kink does for them. And and that was a big help for me, big thing that helped me, you know, understand a lot of things that that I did not know anything about. Yeah. I mean, but it that's from your perspective as the one who was interested in

it and had to explore. Yeah. We you and I have and I think you've even said it on this, podcast before. Your previous spouse had a very distinct and unpleasant re reaction and response, and so there was no real room to navigate that. No. That got shut down. If you said it, I am so sorry because the the brain just fuzzed out for a few minutes. There's, like, some light noise in my head. If you're gonna talk about it with your partner and you don't know how they feel

about kink. Right? Like, you don't you know that maybe they're not into it in the sense of they did not approach you with kink, but you don't know their deep down opinion about it? Start with hypotheticals. Mhmm. Have you heard of? What do you think about? Have you know? The it that gives you at least a place to start with of Yes. What their reaction might be. But also think very honestly about your current relationship and how y'all communicate. Okay?

Because telling somebody you're kinky and you wanna try x y z is a moment for vulnerability. Okay? You are you're bearing a part of

your soul to your partner. And if they are not the type, if you're very honest with yourself and you think back about all the other times you've had to be vulnerable with one another, if they are not a safe place for you, if they are not typically open minded enough to at least listen, even if they ultimately don't like it, if they do not typically support the things that you're into, even if they themselves are not into it, I'm just gonna say don't expect a different

reaction than that. Yeah. If they're mostly open with you and, like, happy to support you even if it's not their thing or willing to listen to stuff that they don't wanna do but you're curious about, that's at least a starting point. That's that's a basis for the conversations. But I see too many people who are like, I'm into this thing. I think it'll make our relationship better. And then they just decide their partners are completely different people than they actually are.

And then they're shocked when it did not go well. I think the other thing is is you can't push. You've gotta be open to the fact that your partner may go, I am not into that, or I'm not interested, or I don't or I don't have time for this, or this makes me uncomfortable. You've gotta be okay with hearing that. It doesn't mean it's gonna be easy to hear. No. But you got you cannot push. If you push too hard, come across too forceful or aggressive, it is very easy to push somebody

so far. They're like, I don't even let's not even fucking talk about this anymore. You know, you've gotta create the space for, I've said the thing. I'm into it. I'm gonna do my own research. I'm gonna go learn. Maybe you go to a munch. And they just know that you're not pushing it, but but they know that if they had a question, they could ask you. Mhmm. And, I mean, sometimes it's a little bit of just being exposed to it to see that, oh, wait. Now I'm kinda curious or wait. I'm seeing you be

more confident, be happier. I wanna, you know, I'm a supportive partner and I wanna be a part of that. But that's a long term thing, especially if you don't know how they feel about kink. Mhmm. Or if you know that they don't want it for themselves, but you're fortunate enough that they're supportive of you wanting it. Yeah. So Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So those are the questions that I was willing for us to answer from Instagram. Some questions. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.

So Wow. During the Nope. I'll show up to you. Nope. During the webinar in the live stream, podcast listeners, you're time traveling. If you would like to ask us anything, you can do that in the live stream. What I need you to do is to please tag us. So as you ask your question, do at loving BDSM. It lights up for us. Do not spam the the live chat. You will get put in a time out. Mhmm. Also, if your question is longer than the character limit of a single message in live chat, it's

it's probably too much for this space. So if anybody's got questions, feel free. Any thoughts, feelings about anything else we've talked about in general? Not really. I, not in this forum venue, whatever, but in other spaces. I could tell both long term listeners, watchers, like, subscribers, however you wanna, put that, but also just people who've been

in kink for a while. Because one of the more common complaints is too strong, but, you know, we'll go with complaints because I can't think of a better word, is that we, you and I, get asked the same questions over and over again. And so then it starts to feel, repetitive.

And, you know, you're you're you're right. If you were experienced or you've been around here, like, the whole fucking time, yes, we do get asked a lot of, questions over and over again because people are entering the kink world at their own time and their own pace, and not everybody will go listen to your back catalog nor lord, we're on episode 419. I would never expect a soul to do that. But, you know, a lot of the the things people wanna know are fairly common. You know? How do I meet

somebody? How do I plan a scene? How do I learn about something? God help us. How do I talk to a partner I don't know is kinky? Right? And so, yeah, we're gonna answer those over and over again. Question, is there ever a way to ask your daddy for a collar or to just say how important it is for a submissive? Yes. You ask. Now the structure of that is gonna be

dependent upon how y'all communicate. Yeah. If you have any previous expectations, rules, whatever in place for how, you know, you as a sub approach your partner, how you ask for things. We are very casual. If I did not have a collar and I wanted one, I would find an appropriate time. It wouldn't be while, you know, we were cooking dinner. It would probably be at a quiet time when he could focus on me. But I would just say, hey, daddy. I I really would love a

collar. Like, do you know anything about them? You know, can I tell you what I've learned? You know, whatever. If you are more structured, then you're gonna have to work within the structure that you have. But there should be nothing wrong with going, I've learned about collars, and I think they're great. And can I share with you? And I would really like one, and then go from there. And and, again, the the whole thing, the coloring can be as simple or as elaborate.

Mhmm. I actually don't even wear my collar all the time. I mean, it was never all the time. My current iteration of my collar I've had for several years now from elegantly owned, our friend Taye Shoe, Etsy, elegantly owned, beautiful collars. I never could wear it at night because I have a anxiety, claustrophobia, sensory thing that if something is touching my neck, I cannot sleep. I feel like I'm choking even if I'm not.

But I don't we got out of the habit, which is something for us to talk about in the between us and the future, of me actually putting it on every day. It doesn't make me wanna call her any less important to me. It's just not we don't currently have the ritual in place to put it on every day. Would I be okay if we sat down together and went, hey. Can we get back that if I was thinking like, I'm thinking about it now because you asked about callers. If I was thinking about it, I could

go to him and go, hey. We don't do this anymore. What and I I don't demand, even though I might be I clearly know what I want. I'm I'm the type of will be sassy about it. I will be direct. I will be assertive as we discussed last week. But I tend to ask questions. What do you think about? You know? I was thinking about this. What do you think? That's how I approach because I know I can, and he's receptive to that. But, yeah, part of, part of that is what is your communication

style? You know? If y'all have never set up anything specific about how y'all communicate, then to me, until you do, communication is wide open. When is the a good time? Like, there's also the, method of, hey. I would like to talk to you about something. When will be a good time to have your

attention and your time and attention? Right? Because when it's serious stuff or stuff that's meaningful to you, you it's not always great to, like, slip it in between the, you know, my boss is a jerk and traffic sucked. Right? You know, that but, yeah, there's nothing wrong with asking. Nothing at all. Let's see. How would you recommend starting a kinky community in a place that doesn't seem to have 1? From the ground up. It's not

helpful. It's not helpful. I I think in in starting a community, one of the first things you need to do is to have a place to hold the venue. And a place to tell people about it? Yeah. Yep. You know, Yeah. Find finding a venue, you know, in some areas, it's it's easy. Mhmm. You know? Other areas, not so much. Depends. You know? Now there was the the one month used to attend years ago, West Pasco, the place it was held at, they knew what we were there for and what we

were doing. They Yeah. Yeah. They no qualms about it. And but but they then also understood the importance of giving us a space that was private or semi private. We had a private space in the back anyway. Yes. Mhmm. So, you know, that that's that's important too. You know, is it some place where you where it can be semi private or or private? Because, you know, you you don't want to, you know if if if you're in a munch and you're you're talking about kink, you know, you don't want other people.

Right. Munches can be held anywhere Right. In any space that allows for public gathering, but common spaces can be restaurants Yeah. Bars. Because that's not my personal favorite, but but Coffee shops. Coffee shops, cafes. Mhmm. Typically, stereotypically, I should say, they're held in places where people can eat and or drink. Yeah.

The reason I get cringey about bars is because you don't know who can hold their alcohol and you don't know what they might be screaming in the middle of a bar that you didn't necessarily want the attention on you or your group. That's that's my personal with bars, but they can be held there. People do hold them there. Sometimes you get, like, less weird looks from a space like a bar.

When you're first starting out, unless you already know you have, like, 10 people in your life who are like, please, let's get together. You don't have to be in a private space. I knew much that got started after we moved here, started out with 2 tables pushed together in a restaurant. We the time was set for when that restaurant was less busy. K? And then everybody understood we were literally sitting in the middle of a restaurant, but the rules kind of on the munch were like,

hey. We're at a restaurant. It's not a private space. Act accordingly. This is vanilla friendly location. Mhmm. Once you establish a group or you outgrow that space, then it's time to start looking for places where you have private or semi private space. Some whether you tell them you're kinky or not depends on you, your community, how well you know you know, if you know the people you're talking to, whatever.

But venues love to know that they can expect once a month, once a week, once or whatever, a group of 20, 30, 40, 50 people Mhmm. Many of whom will probably buy something. Right? That can be the sell once it gets a little bit bigger if you're gonna be in, like, a restaurant or a cafe or whatever. Now picking your place is, like, half of it. You gotta tell people that you gotta munch. Mhmm. The easiest and I don't know. Is it the best? Maybe. The easiest is fat life. Yeah. Because you

can create an event. You can create a community. You can kinda tag the geographic location so people who were searching for events in that area can hopefully find it. But you gotta let people know that there's a munch. Right? But then you also have to expect that unless you already have a bunch of people who've been talking to you about this and are like, yeah. We're down for it. Your first several months, you might have 1 or 2 people that show up. You know?

It can take a while in some places to grow that. We had a recent q and a from somebody who was like, I have been working on this for months and I get, you know, maybe one person comes. And that's kind of the nature of it as well. So anything else you would add to that? Okay. I see our name. Let me know. Let's see. Newbie question. How do I behave myself if I run into an ex at a munch? I'm not I'm not that's not It depends Mhmm. On how

they became your ex. Yeah. If it was contentious, if it was traumatic for anybody, if it was anything less than amicable and, mature, you have to decide if you feel comfortable staying in that space or if you I hate this because it is usually the mature human being who knows how to act in public, who has to be the one to decide, maybe I should remove myself because this isn't gonna this is not gonna end well. Right? But also, if you don't feel safe, you may need to remove yourself.

If we're talking about it's just gonna be awkward, everybody handles it differently. But this question is sometimes asked of what if I see my coworker? Some people prefer to pretend they don't know you, didn't see you stay on opposite sides of the room, and there's nothing wrong with that. Some are willing to go, hey, haven't seen you in a while. How are you? And see what happens. But I think it does come down to the nature of how how did that how did they become your ex. Right?

If it's if it was calm, cool, collected, maybe, you know, hurt feelings, of course, then I don't think you have to do anything No. Really. But if it was contentious, if there's still some, like, really negative feelings or reactions to one another, you know, it it depends. It really does. But if your safety is ever a question, your comfort, I I hate that this is true, but you may need to be the one to remove yourself because you can't make them do shit. You know? But True. True.

Mhmm. Yep. Yep. You don't have to claim your ex. You know, you don't have to if you see somebody you know in any munch, if you see somebody you know and you did not know they were kinky and they did not know you were kinky, you can absolutely act like you didn't see them. Right? But and you don't have to tell anybody you you dated them, fucked them, whatever them, if you don't want to. But how are they going to behave is really the question. And that will determine everything else that comes

after, I guess. Mhmm. Mhmm. Okay. So that's all the questions we've had so far. We have a few more minutes. If anybody wants to, in the livestream, wants to, ask a question, please tag us. Please tag us. It does light up, and we really do see it. Yep. Yeah. I I think in some ways, in some circumstances, we as kingsters overcomplicate some situations. We think that they are inherently more complex because it's kink, and a lot of times it's just a human thing. Rara was

talking about with the munch. Well, if you plan a munch and you host a munch, your work has only begun because at the munch, now you gotta work. Right? You gotta talk to people, and you gotta be helpful and social. However, if you know that's not your skill, can you partner up with somebody? Right. I was gonna say, I I know the 1 munch here, there are a couple

people. The one person does all the admin, you know, the posting and and, you know, time and setting up the the location and someone else who is a sexual butterfly social butterflies. Oh, yeah. They they are in charge of, you know, greeting people and, you know, making new people feel welcome. They're the one person welcoming committee. Yeah. They they clock a new person really quickly Mhmm. And then talk to them and get to know them and help them feel

welcome. And then if they kinda figure out a little bit of their interest or kinda what they're into, if if that's a conversation that occurs, that person is really good. I could never do this. They're so good at this. They know enough people. They're like, oh, I want you to meet so and so, and then they make the introductions between new person and established people Yep. And get them

to talk to one another. Now they understand who they're talking to, so they or about, so they will sometimes know that that person's not open to that, or they'll know, let me go check and ask, but they do the work of partnering and pairing people up so the new person tends to have somebody to talk to beyond just our our social butterfly. Mhmm. I I love watching it. It's like it's amazing to watch. You couldn't pay me enough to do it. The thing the thing But it's fun

to watch. The thing that amazes me with her is there can be 30, 40 people there, and she will know everybody's name. She's so good. Look. You don't have to be that way, and you don't have to know somebody who's that way. But because especially if it's new, you've never done this before. You're gonna learn as go. But that's the kind of thing you need to be working towards and looking for and who can help you with that and who's willing to help you with that

if that's not you. Like, if we ever did something like that, I'm gonna plan it. It's gonna I'm I'm gonna coordinate. And then I'm gonna be like, hey, JB. You go have fun. I'm a sit over here at the corner. Bring anybody who needs to talk to me. Toomey, go be our social guy. That's Yep. That's how we're structured. Okay. Next question. What are our favorite episodes of the the podcast that we've done? I can hardly remember all the topics. I

know. I know. You know, it was 400 and some plus all the other many stuff we've done on the side. It it's hard to say. I I don't really know. I I can't think of specific back up. I can't think of all the times this has occurred. It's top of mind because it occurred last week. I like talking about, from, in my case, submission in ways that are beyond the here's what a sub is. Talking about assertive submissives. Talking about, god. We did another thing on on submission.

And I was like, this is this is a a direction of the conversation that does not you know, anything that breaks down a stereotype of what it means to be a submissive, I fucking love talking about that because there's always at least one person who was shocked by the revelation. Either that it's okay that they are like that or that there are submissives out there they might come across who are like that. Like, I fucking love that.

The other favorite episodes of mine are is I do not ever plan to go on a rant. I do not ever assume that I will rant. But, man, a good rant, that's just that's just cleansing. Like, that's I work through some stuff when I go home. Yeah. Right? Yep. Yep. Anything we've talked about where somebody goes, oh my god. I thought I was the only one. And they realize they're not the only one. I I I think to me, I I was thinking, you know, while you

were talking, I was thinking about it. I I think for me, a a favorite episode is when somebody reaches out and says, you know, what you talked about, what you were saying, it helped. Yes. Oh, my god. I mean, that that that's a wonderful thing. And, you know, to to say have any one specific episode, no, I really don't. But, you know, when when people reach out about an episode and it it helped them, it spoke to them in some way, you know, that's Yeah. It's, 419 episodes, all the minis.

Mhmm. And then anything we just did a video about that we didn't do a podcast about, it it comes into your brain. You give it the focus and concentration you can while you're talking about it, and then you have to let it go because I don't have enough filing cabinets in my brain to hold that. But what that means is I'll think I have come up with an excellent idea. How can we not talk about it? And then I'll go to the archives. I'm like, oh, we we have already talked about this 3 times.

Here's all the instances. There's a downside to that. JB, do you have any methods for resetting yourself after being overwhelmed from making all the choices in your dynamic? No. Wouldn't it be helpful if you did? Well, you know, it it's it's funny you you bring question like that up. I I have been in in a in a space, lately, probably about the last month, easily, where I realized something about myself. And and, oddly enough, it was from watching Fear the Walking Dead. Oh, gee.

Inspiration can strike anywhere. Right. I'm stuck. Mhmm. Mhmm. I'm I'm I'm I am stuck. With with everything that has happened over the last few years and and all the stress, I am in a position I am stuck. And in all honesty, I don't know how to get the hell out of it. So that is, a goal coming up for me to work through that. You saying goal makes me want to say, oh, by the way, I think one of our final episodes of 2024, we'll talk about our goals for 2025.

Yeah. Yeah. I I would agree with your assessment based on what I have seen Mhmm. And experienced. I don't know if I would use that word about myself, but I think I'm in the same vibe. I'm more in a rut because I have things to do. Like, if they're set and established, I just do them. You have to be the one, like, at the drop kind of the drop of a hat to decide a thing, to come up with a thing, to whatever. So, yeah, maybe that will be a future topic. Mhmm.

Not anytime soon. He's gotta work through this. Right. Let me get to the other side first. Yeah. So there there it is. Unfortunately, no. I don't have an answer for you on that. It it's it's something I need to work through myself. I think the question is certainly worth anybody who finds themselves in a dominant role, whether you're a switch or Mhmm. You're a dom, of asking yourself, do you have that? Do you can you imagine how you would do that?

Yeah. I keep personally and this is just in life and as a submissive, and it is different from being a dominant. I keep telling myself the lie. When things calm down, I can focus on that, and it never comes. Happens, does it? It's life. It's life. Right. It if it calms down, I don't even trust if it calms down. Yeah. That's too calm. Right? I'll make up something to happen to make it crazy again. Mhmm. And I think that's that's the thing that I know

it it does it to me. I think it does it to you, and I'm sure this is fairly common where we go, oh, I can't there's no time for that right now, and there's never time. Like, you I know for me, my brain lies to me and goes, you know, if you cannot devote 8 solid hours to this, what are you even doing? Instead of the truth, which is even if I can only give something 5 minutes a day, that's progress. That's time spent. And that 5 minutes can maybe grow to 10, can grow to an

hour, could you know what I mean? Mhmm. But yeah. Yep. Mhmm. Mhmm. I think that, I think, will wrap up with the those will be our last questions. Mhmm. Because it's like a few minutes until the end of the hour, and bonus sections Yeah. Are a thing. Is a thing. So thank y'all, whether on Instagram or here on YouTube for the live chat. Thank you for your questions.

We do if you were like, I had a question and you did not answer it, or I have a really complex question, please use our contact link on our website. I think for I know for, podcast folks, it's in the show notes. I think for YouTube folks, it's down in the description box. You can, like, type out the whole damn story. Send us the question. We do q and a episodes every Monday, nearly every Monday, I should say. Mhmm. Where we just take one question and give it as much time as it needs.

So, that is always available. Baby got a bubble? Yeah. Man. So k. Yeah. So, yeah, I guess we're going to the bonus section now. So are we good? I don't know. Keep it kinky, y'all. And we'll see you next week. Dottie. Yes, baby girl. 1, why can't I remember how to say the things I've been saying since 2015? 2, can we talk to the crickets? Yes. We can. Okay. Thank you. Okay. Thank you. Yeah. DS Bunny and I I think a couple other people, but I saw DS

Bunny do it in live chat. It was like, oh, this top remember this topic you did? That might be great for this question. I need I I I need that. I need somebody who could be like, this thing you're you've already talked about it. I remember the episode. You don't have to remember the name the number. If you just remember the topic, it could remind me that that topic exists. Decision fatigue. If we didn't have that episode, I'd be like, oh my god. We need that

episode. I do remember doing decision fatigue. That makes me feel better. Yeah. I can usually remember the topics we've done within, like, the past year. I won't remember which ones they were, but I can kinda go, yeah. I think we talked about that. I think we talked about that. Mhmm. Once we get past the, like, the year mark, nope. Nope. Don't don't remember anymore. Nope. So yeah. And I have 2 places I look, our archives. I have in Google Drive. I have all the places where I've done I

call them scripts. They're not scripts. They're outlines, y'all. They're barely that. Yeah. So I have those. And then, of course, in, our website, in the dashboard part where I do stuff, where I post the show notes, I check there. But what I've learned is sometimes the word I'm using for a term today is not the word I used 5 years ago. That's fun. That's fun. So Lola's snoring now. Yep. She went out twice while we've been just sitting down in front of a camera and microphones

and wore herself out apparently. And and she was barking at the dog next door, and then she was barking at the folks On the other side. On the other side next door Mhmm. Who were working in the backyard. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep. So, you know, she she went out there, she let everybody know who's Yep. Yep. She was like, hi. I'm here. I'm watching all of you. Mhmm. So but yeah. We have a very,

I don't know. It feels crazy to me because I would prefer to just be in my soft close sitting on my couch every night of the week, every day of a week, every week of a year. And that's not gonna be tonight. No. We will finish up recording. We get a little bit of time, based on what time it is now. It's 2 PM our time. Around, what, 3:30 our time? Maybe a little bit earlier? A little We have to be in the car. Mhmm. We're all going. Yep. The youngest has his social work thing,

and then we have to get dinner. Mhmm. And then the oldest, thankfully in the same city, has a concert tonight. The only, like, woo, yay, maybe, is the oldest told me when we saw him over the weekend, he was like, I might not wanna go out after my concert. I might wanna hang out with and he was so apologetic. I was like, dude, that's okay. Do you know how much money you save me when you don't wanna go get food after a concert? Yeah. And he's you know, they have Thanksgiving

break next week. He's only coming home for the day next week, but that's fine. But, yeah. So we're we're gonna be out and about, and I'm not, the type of person who likes to be out or about. Not not in real pants. Not in a bra. But yeah. And before we, in between stuff today, so you like, we're working this morning. I was doing some stuff this morning, and we had a a moment of calm before we got ready for the podcast and recording stuff.

And we had to map out the next 5 days because for us, we'll be lucky if we take Thanksgiving Day off, which is next Thursday for anybody who's not American and doesn't celebrate Thursday, the I think that's 28th, whatever the number that is. Because we're getting ready for Black Friday. Yeah. And normally, it's always kind of a cluster. I bet if I went and listened to us complain about it every year since they've had the kinkery, we, you know, we are always feeling overwhelmed.

But this year is the 1st year we are only or not only don't feel stocked up enough. So not stocked up enough, we didn't go to Orlando to the woodshed this year because there was no way we could stock for both. We just didn't. It was not an option. Nope. And so we've had to map out how we're going to get I think by the time we're done, you will have, in space of, like, 3 days made, like, 50 or 60 paddles Mhmm. On top of other things. Like, I I got a candle wax melter so I

can make more candles. I'm so excited. Yep. And if it works like we want it to, we will buy a second one. I'm so excited. Yeah. I've been been doing all that in between. Been making, families getting homemade Christmas Everybody's getting homemade this year. Yep. So I've been been working on those. Gifts that everybody's getting in between when I can. I sit and I've been watching Fear the Walking Dead. Mhmm. Mhmm. Been liking that. And, what else been doing?

I have, purposely pulled myself back on social media a lot. Just deleted Twitter off my phone. Why I still had it again, I don't know. I've not been on in Instagram as much other than to, like, monitor the craziness on the Kinkering and Loving BDSM. So what that has meant is do you know if you are not doom scrolling on social media, you have a lot of time for other things. And my other thing has been reading, like Yeah. A

a grotesque amount. I was feeling bad. I was like, how am I reading so much? And then I justified it by, well, you would normally have scrolled this many hours. Yeah. Social media. I mean, I I I I have done the same thing. I've I've removed a lot of the social media off of my phone. Most, just left a couple, like I say, for the for the businesses, for the, the concrete and the wood dom. Mhmm. And and I do not look at my phone as much. No. And and I don't, you know, intend to.

Yeah. So, you know, I've been doing I've been doing other things. I've I've got a 1,000 piece puzzle that I've been working on. Mhmm. You know, I'll I'll take that in, you know, take that out some nights and work on it. Some nights I'll watch Fear the Walking Dead. Some nights we'll watch Outlander together. Mhmm. Mhmm. What I have found, and I hate it because I really enjoy, Outlander, but something about drama shows of any sort, I have to be in a very specific

frame of mind to watch it. Like, I have to like, the other night, you know, Jimmy's like, I wanna watch TV. And I'm like, I would love to sit and watch, but I don't want anything serious and I don't want anything I have to follow a plot to. Like, I don't have that in me right now. So we watched comedy specials on Netflix, which was delightful. Mhmm. JB, I think, discovered that he loves

Tom Papa, who is very funny. I think it's because we're all, like, between him at his age, you and I are on each side of his age, and it's very relatable to us. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. But yeah. Yep. So Rara invite invited you to, join Blue Sky. I know. So here's my thing. I if I were going to start another one, it would probably be Blue Sky because I tried Mastodon and that just wasn't my vibe. Mhmm. I am so out of practice on and no longer know how or what to ever post on a

text based social media. Pictures, I got. I can Yeah. You know, video, I mean, it's kind of a pain in the ass, but I have figured myself out. But just, like, my random thoughts, I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. So yeah. If I, you know, I I have not posted on Twitter for loving BDS Summer, my personal Twitter in

a couple of years minimum. Yeah. We still post for the Kinkry to Twitter because we do get a little bit of traffic for it, but I've kind of gone, I I don't I don't want to be here anymore. So maybe I'll move the Kinkery over to Bluestock. I don't know. I don't know. I know I've I've you know, with Twitter, I I removed, you know, my personal account. I removed the, Wood Dom account, and those were the only two accounts

that I, you know Yeah. Curated and and and I tell you what, when I deleted the profiles and took the app off of the phone and and my iPad, I it was like a sigh of relief. Yeah. I did I always forget until I get to a point where I'm like, what am I even doing? I always forget how stressed out being on Twitter makes me feel. Like, it's I it's just become stressful. And I'm like, why am I doing this to myself? Yep. So yeah. But Yep. Yep. Anyhow. Yeah. Right now, we're working towards

Black Friday Mhmm. Because that's a very important Yep. Time and anybody who sells things kind of calendar. But we're also I'm very proud of us because the past couple years, this has been a struggle. I've not been on top of it like I used to be. We're actually in 2024 looking towards planning for 2025. Yeah. Not everything. Like, there used to be a time we would have multiple coffee dates and I would plan out, topics. I would plan out this. I would plan out that. No. No. No. No. No. No.

I am less intense about that. But we are, yeah, we are actually, like, thinking about the future and remembering that that it will be a new year sooner than we imagined. I'm very proud of us. Yeah. That feels like it feels like a turning point. Because for a couple of years, we did not get to plan anything. We had to react to everything. Right. And I would just literally forget time exists. And so I was like, oh, yeah. It's like 3 days into January. Aren't we supposed to

do things? The first day, no. Yeah. I'm being a little bit more on top of it. Yeah. It's kinda nice. Bad cat asked, do we have a which vending event coming up? No. We do not. We have done that event in the past. This year, we we did not. We did not have the, bandwidth and inventory to do a do the live, event. We could not we could not make enough stuff for for both. It was never gonna happen. And, as for what I'm making for family and friends, I'll give you a

quick peek of a couple things. Sure. And for podcast listeners, we will try to verbally describe it for you since you cannot see that. Yeah. We have a very small family, so we don't have we're not we're not given a, like, a bunch of guests having to you know, JB is not making a lot a lot of things. So and we have thankfully, our family members are very appreciative of, you know, what JB can do. And they've also learned that there are guinea pigs. Yeah. Yeah. He'll go, I wanna try

making this. And then it's a it's a Christmas present, and then he decides, do I wanna make this all the time? So okay. What you got? So, you know, the the family members, they all love Christmas ornaments. Oh my gosh. Yes. So, you know, in between everything, I've been sitting at the, scroll saw and and have been making Christmas ornaments. Yep. You've got an angel. Angel. And, for podcast listeners, it's not like just

the outline. He's got these intricate cuts, like, into the angel wings and down the angel, like, robe thing and whatever. This this still has the template on it. These they're they are far from done. Yeah. Because you've done done the cut. Right. You'll have to do what? The sanding? I have to I have to do some sanding on them now. And then there's the finishing. Then an ornament in the shape of an ornament. I I love it when we

get meta. That's fine. But this and the thing is, what makes these special and unique is, again, it's not just that he cut out the outline. There's designs cut out into the center. Is that is that another ornament in the shape of an ornament? Yeah. Okay. That's a round one. Was is that a Christmas tree cut out of the center? Yeah. Okay. You didn't have to do the booty guru Oh, well, I know you have thing to me. Mhmm. Well but, yeah, these these are the these are what some of the things I've

been working on. Mhmm. And, I don't have do I have them? Oh, yeah. The butter board. Butter boards. I am still I think they're beautiful, but I'm still confused about when a butter board is used or how. Family dinner? So you're having a big meal, and butter is gonna be served, like, for bread or for whatever you might put. And you would just put your butter on this board. You put your stick of butter. Okay. And then it then it has a, a a butter knife. And you pull that

out, and it's right. The butter knife butter when the butter knife's made, it sits. There's a slot underneath the butter board. Right. And so it it's all one it all looks like one thing. So then after the meal and you put your unused butter back wherever you put it, fridge or whatever, how would you clean that off? Soap same way you do the cutting boards. Okay. Same same thing. Just water. Mhmm. If you really need to clean it good,

salt Okay. And a lemon. Okay. Okay. And then you just And then you can always re wood butter it. And then you re re re wax Yep. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep. Yep. Yep. So yeah. I still I still have to make the matter of fact, I just glued up the the pieces for the to make the knives To go with the to go with these. Yeah. Yep. Yep. So that's that's what I've been playing with. Mhmm. In between everything else. Mhmm.

Yeah. And think like I said, thankfully, our family is very, appreciative, and they they get that this was skill and time and Mhmm. So they don't, you know plus they just think that whatever JB makes is, like, the best thing they've ever seen in their fucking life, which is helpful, which is helpful. So yeah. But I'll come. Okay. Anything else? That's about it for me. Yeah. Me too.

There will be more next week because next week, will will we even still have hair left or will we have pulled it out by the time we do the Wednesday livestream knowing that we're prepping for Black Friday? I I intend I intend to buzz mine off in the next couple days. That way, I can't pull it out. There you go. Yeah. We might we might just collapse into our chairs for the livestream and recording and just, like, look like zombies. I don't know. Like, when we were talking

about it, I was like, okay. So over the next 4 days, I'm gonna help you make all these paddles. And then the 3 or 4 days after that, I'm gonna do all these things. And in between, I'm gonna make candles. And he was like, yep. That sounds like you're saying you're gonna try to do that. Mhmm. Mhmm. So it's exciting. I I I love it. I just I'm now at an age where I just know how tired we'll be. Yeah. So you just Yep. You just know. Anyway, we're gonna go. Yeah. We'll see y'all next week.

Thanks for being here. Thanks for sticking to the bitter end. Always glad to have you hang out with us. Yeah. Oh, and spoiler, we're gonna do a Reddit response episode next week, so maybe I'll rant, and we'll all have a good time. Woo hoo. We'll find out. Okay. Bye. Bye.