You're listening to the Loving BDSM podcast episode four seventy two. Kayla Lourdes here with the one, the only, the I mean, you're just supportive and wonderful, and I don't have anything snarky to say because that requires too much energy, and I just can't give it. John Brownstone. Well, okay. The, I am firing on all cylinders, but those cylinders are not heating up like they usually do. I think that's an appropriate, analogy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
You can probably already tell this week. We're keeping it low key for reasons I'll explain it a bit. So we're just calling this one a bonus section episode where we hopefully because we're time traveling and we don't know yet, we will hopefully get questions in the YouTube live chat, and we'll answer those as well because why the hell not? Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast. If this is your first time listening, glad to have you. If you're back for another week, welcome
back. Loving BDSM is produced every Monday and Friday for your kinky pleasure and education. Show notes are found at lovingbdsm.net. Come back often and feel free to add the podcast to your favorite podcast app. And if your podcast app lets you rate, review, whatever, whatever and you enjoy this, we would love your rate slash review. It actually helps other kinksters find us and know we exist. You can also follow the show on FetLife
at loving BDSM PC. The PC stands for podcast, on Instagram and technically threads with that handle I will forever fucking hate, which is loving d s and the number one. So it's at loving d s one. On blue sky at loving BDSM dot blah de blah de blah. Or on YouTube at youtube.com/lovingbdsm where you can watch us live stream the podcast every Wednesday. All links are in the show notes. Okay. Before we get into the chatting, the potential questions, I did have a few things I wanted to run down. One,
our Patreon membership drive is still going. It runs through the February. If you join in the month of February, you will receive, something fun in the mail. Should be by April is the timeline we're trying to work on. If you're in the 2 and the $5 tiers, you'll get a Loving BDSM sticker pack. Some of these things are they're not available for purchase. You're only getting them because you're part of our Patreon.
And if you're in the $10 tier, you get the sticker pack and an enamel pin, p I n pin. This week, I was supposed to, like but my plan was to finalize that artwork and order it and show the Patreon folk what the pin is. And this week has not gone to plan. So maybe later this week. By the time this episode's out, maybe ideally, if not, then early next week. I already know what it's gonna be. I just haven't done the work of it yet.
If you join our Patreon as an annual member, which means you pay once and then you have a year's worth of access, you'll get two months free for, signing up during our membership drive. That means you pay for ten months of access part of our Patreon, we have our Discord server for as long as that will work. It's now that it's coming out that they might do the face ID thing. I haven't even read about it. I've just heard about it. I gotta go. I got thoughts. But for right now, we're on Discord.
And you get access to a monthly behind the scenes podcast episode where we focus on what's going on in our relationship, and we do we alternate every other month, game night and movie night. This month, February is game night. We'll play an online version of Cards Against Humanity. So patreon.com/kaylalords or the link is in the places. If you're not already a member, we would love to have you. If you are in a position where you're like, I am too fucking broke for this,
that's cool. That I get it. Believe me. I get it. You can if you are so inclined, you can show your support in a lot of ways that don't cost a penny. If you are listening on a podcast app, please rate and review if you have not already. That helps people find us. If you have a group chat or a Discord or a whatever whatever with other kinksters and there's some episode that you're like, oh my god. This was helpful. Here, feel free to share your
your favorite episodes with your kinky friends. On YouTube, liking, commenting, those things do help. So, yeah, there's plenty you can do. Doesn't require spending any money, and it does help us out. So that's the Patreon membership drive. The other thing, we have a few days left in as of the day of recording. That's Wednesday, February 11. We have a few days left of our sale at the kinkery, thekinkery.com. It's our kinky Valentine's Day sale. You get 15% off with the code kinky
love 26. That's all one word. It's the numbers two and six. I'll put that in the places for anybody who's like, I'm not gonna remember that string of letters. What? It's in the places. 15% off your entire purchase. We did restock and we have almost everything left. Last livestream, we talked about a brand new toy that is my favorite. It's called the Thumper. We have already sold out. And I've already had people going, when will these be back in stock? And I'm like, I don't know.
They will be. I know. I did promise that. I'm like, they'll come back. I just all know. They absolutely will be. But on our website, if you were like, I wanted the fucking thumper, there'll be a button that says email notification thing. Email me when these are back. That is all that that email is used for. We don't use the the email that you share there for marketing or anything. You will get an email when we were your
stock. But, yeah, the kinkery dot com. The sale runs through Saturday, February 14, Valentine's Day, at 11:59PM eastern. So even podcast listeners, if you're listening on the day this comes out, sale is still going. The coupon code is kinky love 26, 15% off. Okay. Next thing on my list. It's chatty. I get it. And it's not announcements. It's just stuff. So, podcast listeners probably noticed they did not get a Monday Q and A episode this week, week of recording. You got a Tuesday episode.
That is because on Friday, I went, oh, I should I should get the Monday episode ready, and then didn't. And then Monday, I went, oh, it's Monday. I need to do that episode, and then didn't. And then Tuesday, I went, oh, shit. I'm late. And then And then that's when JB went, oh, shit. I haven't edited that episode yet. At the same time, YouTube folk, you're like, what Monday episode right? Because we recorded the video, which uses a different audio, blah, blah, blah,
than the podcast. That was recorded in total silence. It was not working. Oops. Our bad. I do not have it in me to try to do the matchup between the video and the audio. I was like so I put a poll out on YouTube. Oh, thank you, Ella, for putting your butthole in my face. I put a poll up on YouTube of,
okay. Would you just like the link to the podcast episode on our website or do you want me to make a air quote video that's not really a video because it'd just be a picture probably of us looking at each other like we're crazy and then it's the audio playing? Overwhelmingly so far the poll has said, please just do that. So that's coming and that works because next Monday, there's not gonna be an episode. The reason this is a chatty bonus section esque episode is because that's
all I have the mental energy for. And there are reasons. It's not just me like being, I just didn't feel like it. No. There's stuff going on. So, yeah, there won't be a q and a episode next week. YouTube folks, you will get your we're gonna call it a video, but it's it's not a real video, that you should have gotten this week. You'll probably so two things I want to bring to everybody's attention that we talked about a couple of weeks ago already. I just don't want it
to get forgotten. First of all, I've watched several videos this week out of Minnesota where they're like, yeah. You don't see the same kind of videos from us anymore, but that doesn't mean the problems with ICE have stopped. Mhmm. It's just a little bit lower key. So I just wanna remind anybody who's like, I really wish I could help with that. I don't know what to do. I
wouldn't know where to start. Standwithminnesota.com is still a really good resource where there's all kinds of opportunities to help. Do the thing thing that I have learned from watching people online talk about activism and getting involved is do not try to do it all. Just pick a thing, you know? Don't spread yourself too thin. Anything you do that you've never done before is more
than they've had before. So find a thing that's, you know, helping people pets, you know, need help now that their their people have been, you know, detained or helping people pay their rent because they can't go to work or whatever your thing is where you feel compelled, if that is where you'd like to to put time, energy, and money,
just pick one. Cool. The other thing is, if you are a Floridian and you care about, LGBTQ plus issues, communities, laws, legislation, all the shit that is happening in Florida, I'm beseeching you to follow, or check out Equality Florida. I'm getting emails and, social media posts left, right, and center about the anti LGBTQ plus community Yeah. Legislation coming through the Florida legislature. They'll have petitions for you. They'll have things you can actually do.
If you don't have time but you got $10, that will help them do their job. If you are not in Florida, I said this in when we talked about a couple weeks ago. I'm just saying it again. Go search your state name and the word equality and find your organization in your state and see what's going on in your state. Ideally, you live in a place where not a lot's going on, but if you if you live in a red state, I promise you something's going on, and it's just not making news most of the time.
Again, if you have the time to do petitions or to call or this or that, great. If you don't have time but you got cash, $10 goes a long way. But, yeah, it's Florida is just heating up with how shitty can we make life Yep. Yep. Certain people in our state. And For everybody, really, with this session. It does all turn into everybody. Everybody ends up being affected, but whatever. So I just wanted to put that back out there, for anybody who may be interested.
If you missed that episode from a couple weeks ago, because I'm like, it was not there was no title to indicate what the hell we were talking about. Feel free. Go back to listen to that one if you'd like. So that's just the stuff I wanted to make sure, I said before we get into whatever. Also, I'll tell you a lie. I I know I know I'm giving off different energy than usual. Because if I can feel it, I know you can feel it. I am drinking from my emotional support diet
Coke. It's the race track large. And because I go to race track so often, I am, I've got rewards. I'm in a tier four, I think. I get a fifth I get four free fountain sodas a month. And I get 500 more points. I get a free drink every time I go in. I don't think I should be allowed to have that much power. No. No. I just be at restrapped every day. Take your keys away from you. Whatever works.
No. So, without going into too much detail, we have a family member who we went to visit in the hospital this past weekend. They'd taken a bad fall, broken stuff, blah blah blah. But they are I always call them medically fragile. They have a lot going on in their life. And they had surgery on Monday and things did not go well. And next thing I know, they're in the ICU, and another family member's like, oh my gosh. This is bad. My mom's like, I'm getting in the car. I'm coming.
We've been monitoring. I'm getting updates a few times a day. It's already sort of stressful to, like, know that you've got this family member that's like that you literally we literally just saw on Sunday. And she they weren't doing amazing that day, but we had two hours of conversation. It was like old times. But they're also somebody that I am emotionally conflicted about for reasons. And so I've it's like, okay. I will worry about this family member. I will worry for my mom
who I know is freaking out. And also, I don't know how I'm supposed to feel because everything is weird now. And so I just I've just been living with my phone in my hand, waiting for updates, trying to, like, trying not to focus on that too much. There's nothing I can do. I'm not gonna go be an extra body, up in the ICU. That's never been my vibe anyway. And then I have my own stuff to, face with, you know, feelings and familial relationships that are strained and, you know, all the
fun stuff. All the fun stuff. So, yeah, that's my vibe is off for that. My ability to focus the way I'd like to focus on a topic, it just ain't here. Yes. We are aware we could have taken this week off, and y'all are fully supportive and would have understood. If I had to just sit and stare at the wall today, I think I would be worse of a basket case. It sounds like, things are not they're not out of the woods yet, but things are better. So we're gonna go see the oldest in concert tonight.
We we wouldn't even commit to that until I got the last update from my mom today. And I was like, okay. I do not anticipate being called in to, like, you've got twenty minutes, get your ass here kinda call. So that that feels better. So, yeah, we're just it's just very low energy, lots of emotions. And so so, that's why it's low key and that's why I'm probably off. If it's your first time ever, like, encountering us, it's not usually like this.
I'm usually talking so fast. I can't keep up with my own thoughts. There's usually a topic. So Silent in the live chat's like so YouTube keeps changing shit. Yeah. And so our moderators, Tay hi, Tayshu, and Silent, used to have, like, a little wrench by their name. And now the wrench is gone, and it looks like a shield. Am I seeing that correctly? It looks like a shield. Or a badge? So, yeah. It's funny to every time I open
YouTube, something is a little different. And I'm like, you know, y'all could've sent an email. All the emails you send me about shit I don't care about changing how things look, Just just tell me some of us don't handle change very well. So I think a couple of questions have come through live chat, but I have to go
search them. Let me remind y'all if, for anybody joining us watching the YouTube live stream, if you need to ask a question, please tag us at loving BDSM, and please make sure your question can fit into the character limit of a single message in live chat. Oh, also, I remembered to click the button. Our fundraiser for the campaign for Southern Equality is still going on. We hit our goal last week. Thank y'all, to everybody who's already donated. I just wanna see how much we can do.
And and for the Kinkery, we are donating 5% of all the sales that are made during our sale, all the orders that are placed during our sale. 5% will go to the campaign for, Southern Equality. That is an organization that helps the LGBTQ plus community in the South, in Southern states where rights, and access are being stripped away near daily, helps them get the resources they need, provides direction, provides advice, provides grants. Our family has been the recipient of one of their grants.
And so, I just wanna try and give back as best we can. So, if you're currently watching on YouTube or podcast listeners, you were so inclined to come over to YouTube, you can donate directly through the fundraiser. That money goes straight to them. It's not coming through us. YouTube takes care of it. Mhmm. And YouTube does not charge fees for that. If you want to get something for your donation, you can shop at the kinkerythekinkery.com through Valentine's Day, and 5%, of your order will
go to them. Okay. I am gonna scroll through live chat if you would like to chitchat while I scroll. Me chitchat? What universe are you from? You chitchat. Just not when anybody's paying attention. Only when it's just me and I'm like, you see I'm watching a video. I'll pause and he chitchats. And then he walks away. He stops talking. I turn my video on. And then he turns and he goes, oh, and so I turn my video off, and he chitchats. And then he stops, and he
turns away and walks away. And I start my I'm respectful. I'll pause the video for you. But you don't get it all out at once. And then by the fourth time, he realizes what's happening. And so he then just keeps doing it because I there's all of these allegations of me being a brat, but let me tell you, the biggest fucking brat around here is named John Brownstone. I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what you mean. So I'm gonna scroll through and see if okay.
Chit chat, man. Chit chat. What? She said some mischief. Yeah. I I have to admit with the, the Monday video with the no audio, that was kind of on me. I was so excited having this new computer set up. I didn't go through all the settings on everything to make sure it was set right. It's just nice to have a computer that works. Thank you, Silent. Silent's such a good moderator. Mhmm. Jack asked, what's the line between angry topping and topping when you're angry for stress relief?
That's a you question, my friend. Mhmm. I I think there I I think what at at least the way I'm seeing the question, and there is a difference between being angry Mhmm. And taking said anger out on somebody. Sure. K. So, you know, that that that's two different things. You know, I she forced me. She twisted my arm. No. She didn't. After my sister passed away, she suggested we go to the club and do a scene. Mhmm. And we did. To relieve stress. That was that was what I was thinking about. Yep.
You know, I was, running the gamut of a whole lot of emotions at that time. And, we went, we played, had a had a good time. But also, no, I got to a point in the scene where I'm like, I need to stop. Mhmm. I'm I feel like I'm too close to where I shouldn't be and I need to stop. Did it feel like you were at the edge of a loss of control or that your emotions were No. I had a loss of control. Yeah. I it's a fine line and I think it's gonna be different for everybody.
I would say automatically if you are angry at the person, you're definitely not topping them at that point until your anger is under control. Right. And you're at a point where you're level headed and you can you can do the Mhmm. I don't like what you did, but we're okay kind of thing. Yeah. If you are angry in general and I would communicate that with a partner because they might not feel comfortable and they should be able to consent to that or not. You're like, I've had a rough day.
I'm angry at the situation. I'd like to just do some stress relief. That's for full informed consent for a partner, I would I would put that out there for them, give them the option to say, yeah. I'm not down for this. Catch me on your chill again. Right? But you have to know yourself and you have to be brutally honest with yourself. And that's really hard for a lot of
people to do. You have to be able to go, okay, I know how I can get when I'm angry, or I know that it's hard for me to stop myself at a at some point because of like, you you gotta be really real with yourself. Like, but the the desire to relieve the stress, to try to to help yourself feel better, I think that's fine. I think it also,
it's important that you're emotionally regulated. To recognize that you are angry and to be able to rationally think about I am angry and here's why and whatever, That's a different I don't know. I can't think of the word I want. That's different than raging. That's different than your thoughts are literally racing, your body's basically vibrating, and you're like, who can I hit right now? Uh-uh. I'm not recommending any level of play with
that. But if you're able to be calm in your own mind and body with your anger, You know? Probably, maybe. I I think it's fine to on the side of caution until you know yourself in play as a top or whatever, even better. You know? But, yeah, talk let your partner know what the hell you're trying to do so that they can fully consent and they understand what's going on. Because what if you do get carried away and they're like, wow. Maybe we're just going extra hard. Well, if they know and they
rec they know what is happening Right. You know, they might say forward earlier than they would have otherwise. I mean, that that definitely falls under risk risk risk aware consensual kink. For for my fellow anxious people, I think it's completely valid if you're like, never. I'm not doing that with anybody. I think that's fine. There was a time I probably wouldn't have done it with JB because of my own anxieties and concerns and my personal risk assessment and what I am
okay with and not. And then there came a point where I was like, this man on his worst day still has enough self control. We're good. Because what how what's still has enough self control. We're good. Because what how what goes on with him, with JB, is that he knows himself well enough to go, I'm not in a state of mind to to play at all. Mhmm. I might be speaking calmly to you and I might be able to stay emotionally regulated right now, but nope. Don't put an implement in my hand
and let me swing. Inside is mister toad's wild ride. Exactly. And, you know, that is an understanding of self, that you need to have. And if you don't know that you have it yet, that that's a place to start focusing your own self education on, and just to avoid the risk altogether possibly. But so, Lexi has a question. Thank you, Lexi. What is your advice for a sub who wants to support their dom when they're going through a rough time?
My d is going through a lot and I wanna support him, but he has a hard time accepting help. Oh, I think that's probably a dom thing regardless of any identity, gender, anything. I think all y'all struggle with that. I've to some extent. So here's the thing. It's the most cliche thing of all you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make a drink. All you can do is offer. First of all, that's all you can do is offer.
If they will not accept the help you're offering, the support you're offering, you gotta you gotta let them not accept it. Now depending on the nature of your power exchange and do y'all live together, do y'all spend a lot of time together, do you see each other frequently, what kind kind of things do you do as a sub? What I do for JB is I amp up the service. I look around at his life and go, what would
he let me do without me asking? Because that's the thing, I'm gonna take away a barrier of if I have to if he's going through it and I'm constantly coming to him going, can I do this? Can I do that? I've just added a stressor. But if we have the connection we have, I can look at his life and go, oh, I'll put that laundry up today. Oh, I'll just run that load for him. Oh, I'll
I'll deal with dishes. And I'll either tell him so he doesn't start it, or I'll just do it when he's off doing other things. And but I know those things are safe for me to just do without his permission. And, you know, you think about who your dom is and what, you know, what adds to their stress levels, what they will and will not accept from you as their submissive,
and you kind of go from there. But if the only thing you can do is offer your support and remind them that you're there for them and they're still not giving in to that, you can't control that. I like to think of myself as a soft place for JB to land. So sometimes I can't help but bring stressful things to him because that's the nature of life. Right? We gotta have the hard conversation about something. The other day, I needed to tell him something that I knew he wasn't gonna like.
And I basically said, I'm not having this conversation with you while you are still sober. I'm gonna need you to just light it up. But it's you know, I I get that that desire to do what you can to help. When you care about somebody, regardless of role, you you don't want them to be suffering. You don't want them to be going through it. You want to help. But depending on the type of person they are, sometimes there's only so much you can do. What do you find helps you or that I do that
works for you? Well, you know because you are a stubborn human being. I get it from Lola. Whatever. You know, I know. I am stubborn about accepting help. Okay? That, and, you know, when you started talking about how, you know, when I'm off doing something you you'll go ahead and do the thing. And, you know, more times than not I'm like, okay. Thank you for doing that. Yeah. You're gracious in it. Yeah. There have been a couple of times I've gone, I'm just gonna handle that for you. And you
just go, oh, thank God. I didn't wanna have to do that. True. That is true. So Yeah. So, you know, I I may, grump and grouse. Oh, so much grumping, so much grousing. But, all in all, I just You've learned to be more gracious though. You're still really bad at asking. You will not ask for help when you are And see when you're For me, that is something that come came from the fact that many times I was not getting help even if I wanted it. Sure.
Yeah. And I have that problem myself. If I need help, I'm not real quick to ask for it. I just you you and I both will try to white knuckle through whatever. Yeah. But there's, you know, there's different vibes when it's just you have a lot going on and you're a little overwhelmed Mhmm. Versus there's bad shit going on and you are you having a lot going on, it's easy. I just go, I'll pick up this slack. I'll do this. Whatever.
When it's an emotional thing and, there's no real fixing it, there's nothing time will be the only thing. Right? Or decisions other people make that none of us have any control over will be the only thing that help. Then it's just more, you know, I tend to lean more into probably my nicer submissive side. You know, I'm I'm probably more deferential, because I've learned about you. What will really fuck you up is when you feel out of control. Yeah. And I'm like, okay. What can I
do to give some control back? Like, without stressing you out. And so every situation is a little bit different, but I do. I look for ways that I can help that don't add to his mental load. Mhmm. But it that has to work within our dynamic. Right? Yeah. I have a lot of autonomy in our dynamic, so I can do those kinds of things. And then I am still sassy and snarky, but I have gotten better at picking my moments. That you have. Sometimes I I used to think it was a good moment and it
was not a good moment. Because what I'm trying to do when I'm being sassy like that is get him to laugh, get him to have a lighter moment. Right? And then the other thing that I've learned to do is to offer up things we can do that I know he enjoys. It's like, hey. When was the last time you played Terraria? Or hey, do you wanna watch that show
together? Or whatever the things I know that we enjoy he enjoys doing or we enjoy doing together that don't require effort, that can take his mind off of whatever for even a small amount of time, that he may find pleasure in. I will offer those things up as sort of a reminder of, hey. There are things, you know, that aren't all bad and maybe let's go look at look at that for a minute. You know? But it's trial and error. I mean, god. Been together
almost thirteen years. Yeah. Lived together a lot almost twelve. What's time? Does time even have a meaning in it? It's all over a fucking decade, and so this has been a slow process. Used to be I tried to fix things. We have a whole episode on being a fixer or whatever. Yep. And that got me into trouble because that was too bossy. I don't fix things with a submissive air. Okay? I was in church, got a bitch, and I'll get shit done. So Like a bulldozer. Oh, yeah. Get the fuck out of my
way. I got shit today. So yeah. So I know. Lexi Bunn follows up with, in my case, we don't live together, so I'm very limited in things. And he's stubborn too. I think they all are. He keeps saying he just wants me to be there. You know, I think we discount what that can mean for somebody. Mhmm. Just knowing that a person that cares about you and you care about is will listen if you happen to have something to say, is there to just be that person that you're like, I really I
really care about this person. I'm so glad they're, like, sitting by my side or they're on the phone with me or they're whatever. Right? I I think too many of us, all roles, all people, really wanna try and make something better. And we discount the fact that sometimes our presence really is enough. Because, you know, JB does not do well when he's on his own and miserable. So I've got Ella in my home. I see
that. She's if she's just been a, a, I don't want to put it she's just been around today and looking for pets and comfort, I guess. I know. And you know, I'm gonna give it to her because while she's being held and petted like the baby she is, she's not pissing on things she's not supposed to pee on. That is true. That is very true. Oh my God. True. True. True. Oh my God. We have yet another room we have to close off. Yeah. So Ella doesn't pee on it. Mhmm. I am so tired
of cleaning up pee y'all. I am so tired of that. I really don't think all of it is her urinary stuff. I think some of it is, God bless her, She's a bitch from hell. Mhmm. And if she does not like her living conditions She lets you know. Let you know. She will let you know. See, what I think she genuinely wants is to have her litter box be filled with cloud and soft things only. None of this, like, hard or gritty or this or that litter. No. Not for her dainty toe beans.
And I'm sorry. I can't let you just pee on bath mats because they're soft. Right. Alice asks if she'll purr into the mic again. I don't know. Will you? I'll get you close without pissing you off. Okay. I pissed her off enough. So, yeah, this evening after the stream is over, the oldest Road trip. The oldest has a brass band concert. Oh, I saw him over the weekend because I needed to bring him his prescription. He gets that filled
here. Oh, not on the keyboard, ma'am. He gets that filled here in his hometown instead of college town because of some weird thing the pharmacy required. It was weird. And it's because of the specific medication. So it gives me an opportunity to go see him. And, I asked him. I was like, you got two concerts back to back and we are too old to do two nights of this running back and forth for your concerts. I was like, which would you prefer? And he's like, brass band? I said, look.
I have to ask. I said, what if you had a solo in this other one? He was like, I wouldn't. And even then, I still wouldn't care. Go to brass band. I was like, okay. I'll go to brass band, which is my preferred. It's a smaller audience. It's more relaxed. The conductor of the concert he had last night will not allow them to open the doors until a very specific time, like ten after seven or something. So if you get there early trying to avoid the crowd, you are just waiting there.
The conductor of the concert for tonight is so laid back. She's like, you can come on in while we're warming up and rehearsing. We don't care. I'm just like, I just wanna get a seat in the exact section I like with minimal amount of strange people around me. I I mean, did we have to wait till this child's was it just this school year? It's junior year we got this right? The way the auditorium is, there's the middle of the auditorium, really long rows,
people around you for fucking days. And then on the side of the auditorium, there's rows of four, and we are three. And it's only in the most packed concerts, which only happens once a year, that somebody sits in that fourth scene. Every other concert is just the three of us just chilling in our little row. No stranger sitting next to us. Oh my gosh. So Excuse me. Nikkita asked, are there such things as trial dynamics? And when do you recommend trying that out?
You know, I I haven't thought of that in a long time, but, you know, kind of there is in a sense. Used to be talked about a lot back in the day when I first came into the community where someone would be what they called under consideration. Yes. Yes. Yes. I remember that. K. You know, they'd be under consideration to be your sub. They'd be under consideration for collaring. Yeah. And it was all my experience of seeing it, it was always under the Dom's consideration.
Yes. I would sometimes hear people talk about it in, a way that I've appreciated, which was we are under each other's consideration, but the dom is kind of technically in charge. Sort of, they would go through kind of this trial with one other. And then after a certain amount of time, whatever time they had prenegotiated, they'd sit down and go, how do we both feel about this? But there yes. There was always a certain layer, a certain class of doms.
It was the they, you know, they have to prove themselves to me for me to be their dom, which that is true, but there was never the and I have to prove myself. But works both ways, really. Yeah. Right. So Yeah. And, should you I mean, if you want to, if that Yeah. You know? And I get my thing is always whenever you choose to do anything, in this case, a trial dynamic, is to make sure you understand
why and what purpose it serves. Mhmm. Is it a trial dynamic to see if this specific type of dynamic works for you? Or is it this specific partner or the fact that, okay. I'm with this partner. We're gonna experiment with power exchange. You know? That's cool. Is it the under consideration kind of vibe? You know, for me, I know my personality. I know
how I am with relationships. That that's not something that would ever work for me under probably any circumstance other than I'm already in this relationship and we wanna experience experiment with different ways of doing a dynamic, yeah, I could do that. If it's what you need to help you feel secure in whatever decision you're making about a partner, the dynamic you wanna be in with in in general and or with a specific partner, I don't think there's anything wrong with
that. I think it needs to be negotiated like anything else. How long? What are the parameters? Mhmm. What will both partners do? How will they behave? What is this that you're trying to accomplish? You know. But if that offers some comfort and helps you feel like you're able to make a decision for yourself, I would say go for it. Mhmm. I I mean, it's a it it you know, doing something like that, it's a personal Mhmm. Decision. There's, you know again, there's no manual that says,
you know, this is how it's done. Mhmm. You do it however works for you. Mhmm. And, you know, yeah. That's, you know, yeah. Mhmm. Mhmm. So what else is going on with you? What else is going on with me? Feel free for anybody watching if you wanna do a question. Well, my my days have been kind of broken up this week. Mhmm. Mhmm. And, I have been, you know, I I I think anytime you have anything you do really, you know, whether it's a wood shop or or any kind of, it's like an ongoing thing.
I I just worked on tweaking the dust collection in the tiny shop. And, then today where I was working on this was an unexpected. The big dust collector in the garage sprung a leak. Yeah. It's not supposed to do that. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Okay, Emma. So, found found what I needed to get. Ordered parts. They'll be here Saturday. And today, I took the stupid thing all apart, cleaned it, and
have it all ready. So that way when the parts show up, hopefully just throw it on and, can start milling wood again. Yeah. We need to. Yeah. Yeah. We need to. Yes. We do. The only reason we could restock paddles is we had milled the wood before Christmas. Right. We have a question. Okay. Enchanted wings. Hi, enchanted wings. Any tips for being in class with an ex partner who still wants most of the physical affection we had in our past relationship? Well, I guess it depends on what you
want. Right. If you don't want any of that, you're gonna have to communicate very firm boundaries, and then report to whoever is kind of the authority in that Mhmm. Place if they violate those boundaries. If you want it Yeah. Then I still think there's probably needs to be a conversation to sort of negotiate what that looks like.
Yeah. But if you express that you what you do or don't want and they do not abide by it, you know, hopefully, there is somebody in that space who can you know, the rules have been laid out clearly. You know, I'm thinking of a kink space. Right? And will remove somebody if they cannot behave. I hesitate to tell somebody to remove themself, because I should that's not fair. You shouldn't have to give up something because somebody else, you know,
is shitty. But sometimes, depending on the place and what the people in charge are willing to do or are not willing to do, you have to do that. So I think, it just it depends on the the situation. If you do not want their physical affection Right. Say that? Yeah. I mean, you you set the boundaries. Mhmm. Mhmm. Those those those are your boundaries. So whatever that means to you in this case, it it's up to you to set those boundaries. Right. And hopefully, they will respect those boundaries.
Right. And, you know, if you can coordinate it and you don't want to be around them and you don't want that effect from them, you know, sit in a different location. If you can't, again, I hate having you tell somebody who is being bothered that they need to change their behavior. Like, that sucks. It should be a person doing the bothering. If it's awkward in the sense of, this is just weird but not unwanted necessarily, I still just have a conversation. And to the extent
of, like, this is weird. Right? Yeah. Maybe maybe they agree. Maybe they get it. Maybe they don't. You know? But but think about what you want and then and then focus on that. Who cares if it pisses that person off or they don't like it or that that might be your thing to have to deal with, but it is not your problem. I those are their emotions and their but I hope that there's somebody, in that location who can handle things if they don't respect your boundaries.
Yeah. So And and, you know, she kind of follows up, you know, set some boundaries, but it's vanilla class. We know each other from kink spaces. You know, it doesn't matter if it's a vanilla class. Doesn't matter if it's a grocery store. Okay? Still risk those boundaries should still be respected. But think about what you want not not the what will you know, don't don't worry about hurting feelings or disappointing somebody.
If you're okay with being around them, but it's like that funny awkward, cool. I would to respect both y'all's privacies, I would not talk about your connection in that space. Maybe on a break, right, in the parking lot. Oh my gosh. Isn't this weird that we see there and here and acknowledge it? I think it things get way more awkward when everybody pretends it's not happening.
But if it's awkward in the, oh, I'm feeling kinda gross and weird now, that's when, you know, calls for a little bit more. So Tayshoo asks, how's the rollout for the thumper going? Looking forward to using mine. We are sold out. We are sold out. Back to the shop for me. Yeah. Yeah. At least that was one that doesn't require you milling any wood. We've already got I've got. Yes. Yeah. Yes. I I'm grateful that other people see what I see in the thumper.
I hope everybody else enjoys it the way that I enjoy it. But, yeah, we sold by okay. So the sale started Friday. Mhmm. I was still processing weekend orders yesterday on Tuesday, which that is unusual. Normally, whatever comes in over the weekend, I've dealt with them on Monday, and there were too damn money, which many, which is a great problem to have. So I was finishing up by Tuesday. And Tuesday, it's when I knew they were sold out. They could have sold out on Monday, but I didn't see
the order come through. So we didn't exactly have, like, 50 of them. You know? It's but, yeah, they actually the thumper sold out and sold faster than our diabolical sticks. Yeah. And that that's a strange thing to experience because usually the diabolical sticks, they're gone They're gone. In a weekend. Mhmm. So for anybody who's like, oh, I bet they don't have any more Lego diabolical sticks. Yes. The hell we do. Feel free to go shop. Thecancery.com. Good. So Excuse me. Pardon me. Yeah.
Oh, and Shannon Wing's follows up. Funny awkward at times. He sometimes mentions the things he's planning for an event at break. So here's the thing I would keep in mind. There's nothing wrong with y'all chit chatting about that if you are comfortable. But if you are in mixed company and you're and that's what's being talked about and you're concerned somebody might overhear, that's a boundary to set up. Hey. I'm happy to talk about this with you, but I don't wanna talk about it in here.
Let's talk about it when it like, there's nobody else around. So just, you know but it is it I still remember the first time I saw a kink friend in the parking lot of the grocery store, and I lost all chill. Like, I completely forgot that until you both acknowledge one another, if one of you pretends they don't see you, then that is the rule of, oh, I don't we're not having this conversation. I'm living my own life and Right. I'm
not mixing human illnesses. There are people who outside of their kink life, they do not want to be approached. Mhmm. Yeah. Almost forgot myself. I was so excited to see because she's somebody I genuinely like. I was so excited to see her. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She was way better at the pretending we don't exist thing, so it's fine. So yeah. Oh, Lola went to the eye doctor on Monday. Yes. She does not need her antibiotic anymore. Nope. We are on lookout watch for if her eye gets all
weird again. Mhmm. But, as long as everything stays stable. Right. We can, we can wait for, like, three and six month follow ups. And, apparently, JB got an a plus in doing what the vet tells you to do because the vet was like, look. I'm setting this follow-up for three months. But if she is completely good in three months, I trust you to do what you're supposed to do. You can call and ask for a six month follow-up instead of a three month follow-up so you don't have to bring her in
here for nothing. And I was like, JB got the gold star from the vet. Right. You you won at the vet. I guess I did. I didn't even think about it. I mean, you know, I did what I had to do for the girl. Mhmm. I know. Mhmm. And I, you know, I would I know I would do what needed to be done, but you are way more consistent and focused than I am. So I'm glad it's you. Well, I I had to create a whole thing around it Yeah. You did. To remember. Yeah. You did.
Because, like, what I had to do at breakfast noon and then dinner, she'd get two drops. Mhmm. And they had to be timed twenty minutes apart. Mhmm. Yep. So I had to do all that and, yeah. But I did it and her eye got better. And her eye got better. Yep. Knox says in live chat, I'm so infrequently in vanilla spaces that I accidentally introduced myself as my scene name in a coffee shop the other day. I will have you know, I live my life more as Kayla Lords than I do Mhmm. Insert legal name here.
I I have to, like, consciously remind myself, this is not a Kayla Lords space. Say your legal name. Mhmm. Yeah. Oh my gosh. So for anybody who's ever like, what are the Friday night livestreams like? This, but more, higher energy and more chaotic, but this. Also, on Friday nights, we do tend to talk more about food Mhmm. Movies and TV shows. Mhmm. Bacon. There's only one correct type of bacon. I watched a reel yesterday, followed, but I do not follow
quickly. I'm very selective in my following on social media. But he I guess he's a chef, and, he and his partner and somebody else that was there, went to this diner. And the whole thing was they were like, okay. Do you have regulars here? And the server's like, yeah. We do. Okay. I want the meal that you're happiest, most cheerful. Y'all love to see this regular coming. What is their normal order? And they went, okay. Blah blah blah. And then he went, and
I want also, who's your grumpiest? Who's your, like, just they're not they're not mean. They're not bad, but they're they're not cheerful. They're your grumpiest. I feel like I would come under I would be classified as a grumpy one. I want their order too. I wanna see the difference. The grumpiest one likes his bacon so, crisp that it crunches and falls apart upon touching it. I went, I and loves home fries and wants, like, soft
cooked eggs. I went, oh my god. I am the grumpiest person in the entire. But, yeah, he said he was like, oh my gosh. This is so crispy. And even the chef who was doing this little real thing went, I prefer crispy is the only correct way because it is. And he was like, listen to how crispy. And he takes this bacon and gets real close-up to his mic and he crunches. And I was like, well, now I want some damn bacon. So
yeah. It's funny. Apparently, the happiest person, the one that's just, like, the lights up the space gets a blueberry pancake with eggs and bacon. And I was like, give me the potatoes. They're really crunchy bacon. I feel like, that fits better for me. We used to have all kinds of really good diners to go to when we lived in Tampa Bay area. Yeah. Had some really good local
ones. Mhmm. And we have a couple here, but it's just not the diner experience that first of all, it's not the diner experience of twenty, thirty, forty years ago, which, of course, it's not, is anything these these days. The one that is actually really close to us, since we've lived here, they've gone they're, they've been bought and sold at least once, maybe more than that. They're kind of inconsistent. Some days, it's freaking amazing. And I'm like, this is the best thing I've ever had.
And some days, I'm like, is this sausage gravy or is this paper mache paste? What are we eating here? And what did you do to the biscuit? See, like, to me, the diner experience I I recognize it will never be as cheap as it used to be, which is very sad because nothing will be as cheap as it used to be. But, like, if I'm going to a diner, a greasy diner, those better be some of the best biscuits I've ever had in my fucking life. Right?
Like, that's just I mean, to to me, the closest place I think is the one that's, fairly close here. Right. Right. The one I was just saying. Mhmm. But they're inconsistent. I did sausage gravy, and that was the grossest sausage gravy I've ever had and the hardest biscuit. I think that's when I went with my mom. You weren't there for that one. Okay. No. But you were there for when both of us went, is this a biscuit? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And in the South, I'm judging you on
your biscuits. I just am. I don't have high expectations once like, we're north and, I guess, west of the Mason Dixon Line. Like, I I get it. We cross the Mississippi. South? A diner? Those those biscuits should be so light and fluffy they can just they're floating through the fucking air, and I'm picking them out of the atmosphere. Okay? Just what is even happening? But then again, then you have somewhere like Todd and Shelley's where you're never disappointed.
They are really good. I okay. So they used to be a place we went maybe once a year. And that's a very diner esque, experience, but they it's elevated. So their thing is not really diner food. It's these hotcakes that taste like a dessert, the specialty hotcakes. So it used to be we went there, like, once and then we didn't go there for, like, two years. And then we went it was, like, six months. It was really rare and special to go. And so I always got a specialty hotcake and just had
dessert for breakfast, and it was delicious. Then we went so often that I finally went, oh my gosh. I think next time we come, I need to try something else on their menu. I've literally never had anything. Other than the I had a BLT the first time because I was like, man, I don't know about this hotcake business. And then after that, I've only ever had hot I've not had anything,
not a thing else on their menu. Well, see, I was I was like you the first time I was there and I just had the, biscuits and gravy. Mhmm. And that was but that was just like, boom. Yeah. So good. Now I do wanna try their biscuits and gravy. Mhmm. But they've had moments I've I've seen their biscuits haven't always they're not always top tier. And I guess it probably depends on who you got back there. You know? I get it. I get it. But I will say their their hotcakes
at Todd and Shelley's are always immaculate. They're so good. These these hotcakes, they're they're like that big around. For podcast listeners who could not see a screen, I would say the diameter across Mhmm. Is probably six to seven inches across. And they're easily an inch. Sometimes an inch and a half thick. Yeah. Oh, they're so good. And they are so good. And we get the specialty ones, so it comes with toppings. So there's the cinnamon roll one, which is my favorite.
It's cinnamon and butter and the frosting. Oh, so good. There's a brown sugar one. Yep. There's a caramel apple one. Mhmm. That's good. Yeah. That one's good. And, of course, they've got blueberry and what was another one you got? Was it raspberry swirl? Is that pretty bad? They got, like, a banana one. Oh, okay. They got a cookies and cream one. I'm like, okay. That for me, that's that's too much. That's too much dessert from with my breakfast. You know, they they are. They are so
good. They but they're rich. They are so rich. Mhmm. But they're so good. Oh, mhmm. Mhmm. So that yeah. That one is a, a good place to go. They're not close, and they really do need to be reserved for special drinks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We finally they were doing an early bird special, and we kept saying we should go because it it was cheap. It was like it
felt like diner cheap. Right? Mhmm. And I was like, you know, us getting away at 07:00 in the morning for breakfast would be so much easier than a lunch date or even a dinner date. We should do that at some point. And then we didn't because that's how things go. And then JB had was it your MRI? Yeah. I had yeah. It was like an 7AM. Early in the morning. Yeah. 6AM or whatever MRI. Six. It was 6AM. Yeah. So it finishes up and we're like, oh my god. We're so hungry.
And we're like, what do we wanna eat? And one of us was like, Todd and Jellies is, like, a block away Yep. From where he the Yep. The testing place was. Yep. And we walk in in time for their early bird special, a 100% order their from their early bird to find out it was the last day. Last day they were doing it. They were doing it because it had not been a success. They were not pulling in people. People. Yeah. Shelley of Todd and Shelley's was like, sometimes
my first customer is not till 09:30. I am not doing this anymore. And I'm like, no, ma'am. You shouldn't. So but yeah. But good diner food. See, when I was a kid, my dad's thing when we would travel anywhere if we had to go on the interstate, which was very rare, we did not travel like that very often, was truck stops. Because that was back then, that was cheap and the plates were massive and the portions were massive because they had to feed
trucks. Damn good. Oh my god. It was all cooked, I'm sure, in lard. It was so good. It was so good. Yep. I haven't even when I've tried to find places to start, I have not had anything like that since the nineties was the last time I had a true like, truck stop meal experience. And yeah. Yeah. I I don't know if it still exists. The last time I was up in New York, in town where I went to school,
place called Millbrook Diner. Mhmm. And it was actually one of those I like a like a trailer, you know, the silver. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like the old timey diner. Like diner diner. Yes. That's where Oh, okay. And the last time I was up there and no. It wasn't last last year. It was time before that. There was actually up there for a a fun trip. It still existed. Oh, wow. Still existed.
And the I went in there, and the one thing that changed, this diner always, you know, had the you you you slide into the booth and there's the little jukebox machine there. Oh, wow. Yeah. Okay? Yeah. Yeah. You know, and you put your quarter in and you you flip through, they still have them. They're digital now. I was gonna say But they still have them. It's debit card. Yeah. Alright. Yeah. It's digital, but they are still there. That's what the day The building itself
still looks Oh, cool. The same too. I'd say the first time I saw a jukebox, a full size one Mhmm. That uses, like, debit card, I went, I am an old lady. What is even happening here? Oh my god. I'm officially old. I'm you know what? I'm good with vending machines taken, like, then, debit card, credit card, whatever. Mhmm. I'm pretty sure it probably, helps speed up the price increase because Yeah. You know, whatever whatever. Like, I'm I'm cool with that because a
lot of people just don't carry cash. And it's fine for anything to to be electronic like that and digital like that, but it's just the the jukebox experience. Yeah. I'm an old lady. I'm officially an old lady. It's silent for me that it it does still exist. Okay. Cool. Cool. Maybe one day you'll get me that far north. Yeah. Hasn't happened yet. Furthest north I've ever been is Baltimore, Maryland. And it snowed on me that day. It's only there for a little bit.
And when I say snow, I mean, like, it touched me and it melted immediately, but still. I did I stand in front of this, hotel we were supposed to be walking into and stand and look up and let the little speckles of snow hit my face straight in because I never I never had that experience. Now there was a place we thought might become like our diner. Because see, when we lived in the Bay Area, we had a few restaurants diner like restaurants we like to
go to, but we had a diner. We just that's where we went. We were trying to find that here where we live now, and there was a place that it could have been. It was it was good food. We went and we had a good, good breakfast there one day. And we went a second time. We're like, okay. This is good. And then, like, the next time we wanted to go, they'd been shut down, I believe, by the health department. Mhmm. And then we were talking to family who's lived here for,
like, forever, and they're like, oh, yeah. That place gets shut down by the health department all the time. And I'm like, what have I walked into? Okay. Yeah. Okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It took me a minute to think that the place yeah. We drove up and everything was shut down one day. Yeah. I was just shuttered. I was like because we drove up going, oh, wow. Is there not gonna be a wait this time? Right. Close. Yeah. I know. Yeah. I
know. Yeah. Yeah. I used to used to hang out at that at that place after, used to stay after school for, after school programs. So you weren't really doing after school programs? No. You were just telling your parents so they would leave you the hell alone. You could do what you wanted for a few hours till you had to go home. Right. So Well, I I didn't learn that trick till I was 17. Because I'm a dumbass.
So, you know, stay and, then go downtown, hang up either at the general store or the diner, and then go back to school in time to catch the bus. See, that's because you were a hooligan. I don't know. You were doing all kinds of shit you should've been doing at too young of an age. See, I was a goody two shoes who was like, oh, I'm staying after school because I have, like, five club meetings that I have to go to plus something to practice and there's something else and blah blah blah.
I've truly, I was in my senior year of high school before I finally got the opportunity and had the intelligence to go, oh, yeah. I gotta I'm working an extra shift tonight at my job, or I'm working a double, which is overnight. I'll see you in the morning. I was out running those fucking roads. Zion goes, oh, wow. So the place is ancient. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Jimmy went there when he was a kid. You know, Tayeshe, the health departments just don't
have any, like, vision. Tayeshe says my favorite Thai food place was closed by the health district. It turned out the cooks were traditional grandmas dressing in, robes and nightgowns with flip flops rollers and nightgowns with flip flops. Oh, wow. I bet that was the best fucking food thing. Right? Like, sure. It was not, like, maybe to the health department standard, but I bet that I bet it was immaculately good. Look at the known as we got at the bakery by us here. Oh my god. Oh, god. Walk so
it the Italian bakery, we love it. It's very good. I still wanna try one of their cakes at some point because they they bake cakes and decorate them or whatever. You do not go in there for a quick, I'm just gonna get a loaf of fresh baked bread and leave. You are there for a while. Sometimes it's because there's a line and sometimes it's because their expertise is in cooking the food and telling their kids and grandkids who have been forced to work there to shut the hell up and get back to work.
Efficiency and customer service? No. No. No. No. But that's not why any of us are there anyway. No. I've I've watched them before go back and forth and back and forth and get and I feel I have a lot of empathy, forget what they were doing in the middle, and I just I'm just like, oh gosh. Yeah. But you know what? The food's so fucking good. None of us are complaining. No. It is delicious. And it's a it's a working bakery, so it is always hot as shit when you walk in there.
When I was at, like, all of the hot flashes all of the time, I almost, like, I got nauseous in there one time because it was just warm in general. It was summertime in Florida, and then I lit up from within and was like, I'm going to die in this Yeah. Bakery. And we still stood there and waited for our brand. And it's not pretty. No. God. No. It's not pretty. It's it's not this, you know, pretty dressed up fancy place. It's It's not. It it's been around a
hot minute. I bet it I bet it was beautiful for the time when it was new. Yeah. Because you can see where they painted murals on the walls of different parts of Italy and whatever. Mhmm. Mhmm. But yeah. I mean, it's some good fucking food though. Oh, man. We did learn the lesson of we we went a couple days before Christmas because we were doing sort of air quote Italian kinda Christmas dinner. And we wanted to get cannolis, and we wanted to get bread, and blah blah blah.
Mhmm. And we did learn the lesson of we should have called and ordered it, so we just had to go pick it up. Yep. So we got lucky. They had extra. And they you know, the we we always managed to get a loaf of of bread from them, but, it's it's basically been just the regular Italian bread. But they also do rye bread. They do marble. We still haven't gotten any of that. The only way you're getting those, you have to order it. You have to call up and say, on
this day I want this. I want x amount of this and that loaf and And yeah. And I can't figure out how they're making money because they don't it does not feel expensive. Mhmm. And you spend $8? I think it's 8, might be 10. Mhmm. But you spend this minimum amount and you were getting a free thing of bread. Yeah. And it's not day old, Brady, that you'll be fresh bread. And I'm like, you're giving so much bread away. One one time we, came out of there with pizza dough. Mhmm.
Which was really good. Which was really good. Bought several loaves of bread and they were like, here, it's pizza dough. We bought the cannolis and we bought, I think, something else. And we bought a specific, like, baguette thing we wanted. And all of that, they're like, oh, well, you can have one or two like, two things of bread because of this purchase and that purchase. And I'm like, well, I'm gonna fucking take it because this is the best fucking bread I've ever eaten. But
I'm just in my head going, how? How? And then It clearly looks like you're home just ripping these baguettes apart and just ripping into them and Everybody look Yeah. Every one of us gets caught at some point in the kitchen. And I say including the 16 year old Yep. Like a raccoon just shoving bread in our faces in a dark kitchen, not offering to slice a piece for anybody else. It is every person for themselves. This bread. That is true. That is true.
Yep. So I'm not one to usually do this, but if you'll give me three more minutes, because you know me, I love a number that ends on a five Mhmm. I'll be willing to be done. Our clock says it's 04:12. The delay and the lag, I don't know what time it'll be by the time you hear me say that. But three minutes, and then we shall be done for the day. As far as I know, as long as everything stays stable in our lives, we'll be here Friday night. 8PM eastern. It used to be a later time.
It's an earlier time now because we are old people. I do keep forgetting. Like, I type it out right. And then when I start thinking about the Friday night livestream Mhmm. My brain goes to We haven't done it enough at that time yet. We've only done it once at that time. If anybody keeps count on calendars of, like, wait, you would not normally do your Friday night livestream at this point in the month, we are traveling next weekend. Yeah. And that'll be a very long weekend. We
have an overnight stay in Virginia. We're literally flying in the evening of the eighteenth, flying home the night of the nineteenth. Basically, we'll drop pull into our own driveway at probably 2AM on Saturday the twentieth or twenty first. And then at 06:00 on the twenty second, at least one of us needs to be in Gainesville because the oldest is doing a big recital thing. And I said, I'll be there. I don't I don't know if anybody else will be with me, but one of us
will be there for you. Oh, that will be a very long weekend. Yeah. It will. So Yeah. It will. But it it'll be good all the way around. It it there'll be some stress and we'll be exhausted. But Yep. And Lola's gonna go stay at boarding for the first time since we've had her Mhmm. And get the the luxury treatment. So Yeah. But yeah. So we we moved everything for
this month. I did not mean to book end Valentine's Day with with stuff for us because in our Patreon, we have our game night on Sunday the fifteenth. We don't have any plans for Valentine's Day. We don't go out on Valentine's Day. We're not doing it to ourselves. Never have. Never will. But we haven't had a real date night in No. We in a while. Yeah. So maybe at the end of the month, fight time, get through Valentine's weekend when I'm not leaving this house,
and then our travel. You know, I I'm I'm gonna make a suggestion because we've had a certain gift card for over a year now, and we cannot coordinate getting everybody we want. No. So I think, you know, I I I think it's time. Yeah. It it's time and, you know It's time to actually use Yeah. Yeah. It's it was a Christmas, family restaurant gift card. Yeah. Christmas twenty twenty four. Yeah. Okay. It is $4.15 by our clock. Okay. So we are gonna go.
Thank you all for being here. Mhmm. Thank you all for indulging me in, not at all a topic. Thanks to the folks who had questions in the live chat. Yeah. So we appreciate y'all. Thekinkery.com. Having a sale. Patreon.com/kaylalords. It's gonna be part of our community. Try to support your local, state, whatever, anti LGBTQ plus groups, legislative groups. Your equality, Florida, your Georgia equality, your Virginia equality, those places. Try to support support them if you
can. Yes. And you're gonna go. Mhmm. Okay. K. Bye. Bye.