You're listening to the Living BDSM podcast episode four thirty three. Kayla Lords here with the one, the only, the your shirt makes you look like you might be a little sad, but it's really a funny pun. It's a sad manatee. It is. Like, I wanna cry for this manatee. I wanna cry for all the manatees. I'm a Florida girl. I know, how they what happens with them. Yeah. And it is it is heartbreaking. It is. John Brownstone, by the way. There's That one Sideways? Yeah. Real quick. Mhmm. Mhmm.
Mhmm. I I got nothing. I was thinking, y'all will hear, in the Monday episode next Monday's episode, how I couldn't find anything snarky to say. And I'm realizing I'm not finding a lot snarky to say one. You know, I'm I'm very content with us. And two, I just I don't know. Like, creatively, the snark is just not there right now. The sarcasm just isn't there. I'm feeling way too, like, genuine or some shit. I know. What? I know. You I know it happens.
What the fuck? I know. That's not what we're here to talk about, though. This week, we're talking about 20 nope. What are words? Twenty four seven power exchange and total power exchange. What they are and whether they're the same thing. Spoiler, not quite. Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast. If this is your first time listening, glad to have you. If you're back for another week, welcome back. Lola also welcomes you back. Loving BDSM is produced every Monday and Friday for your kinky
pleasure in education. Show notes are found at lovingbdsm.net. Come back often and feel free to add the podcast to your favorite podcast app. What are words? You can also follow the show on FetLife at loving BDSM PC on Instagram and threads at that handle. I will forever fucking hate loving d s and the number one, so it's at loving d s one or on YouTube at youtube.com/lovingBDSM, where you can watch us live stream the podcast every Wednesday. All links are in the
show notes. Okay. Before Okay. It looks like everything's working. I don't trust it. That's far. Before we get into Okay. There. Knock the wood. This week's episode who's being chaotic now? Who? Who's being chaotic now? Excuse me. I would like to do some announcements. There are a couple of them. One, I'm happy to say after I kinda weirdly teased it in ways that not everybody would have picked up on anyway because I don't know how to do that.
The twenty twenty five dom sub virtual summit is coming back March 31 through April 3. Attendance is free. You can register for free. A free ticket gives you access to each day's, sessions for twenty four hours. So you don't have to be there live. You just gotta go watch them within the twenty four hours. There will be, for anybody who has a budget for it, a paid option that gives you other stuff. But if you you don't have it, but you want some good BDSM education Mhmm. You can attend for free.
We have a session that is so right up our alley, and after the summit will be the reason we do a series on this, how to make your dynamic work in the real world, which is kind of our fucking jam. It's kind of like what we do here. So, but there are also plenty of other, really good educators and sessions. Princess Rara, who is watching live right now, has a session on kink comparison, which, like, I just saw
the title. It's not a session I can go see yet, and I immediately had thoughts and ideas for some of our future content. So thank you for for that. Rara. Evie, Evie has, a session. Sonya Megatron has a session. Luna Motatus has a a session. There are sessions on bondage. There's there's at least one, maybe two people who are kink therapists who have some things. Like, it's it's good y'all. The link to go check it out, see what's what, register if you're interested, is in the
places. Let me just say again ticket is free. For free for free. This is one of those situations where what we were tasked with by the organizers was this is not that webinar bullshit weird thing you might have experienced where you sit through an hour of somebody, like, giving you very basic information and then they end it with, but if you buy you no no giving you very basic information and then they end it with, but if you buy you no. No. No. Like, these are actionable tips.
That was our job was to create, a session where anybody who watched it walked away with, oh, I can try this. I can think about that. This is a way to do this. So it's actual legit value, and you don't have to pay for it if you ain't got the budget for it. Okay? Okay. So that's, March 31 through April 3. If you happen to be on our email list, you'll hear about it again. Just sayin'. We'll talk about it again next week cause I want as many people who want to attend to be able to attend.
Second announcement, less exciting but it's a thing. This Friday, don't ask me what the date is, I think it's Friday, March 21, but I didn't look at a calendar and we know how I am. We are doing our Friday night, livestream. It starts at 09:30PM eastern, ends at 11PM eastern. It's chaotic. We hang out. It's it's got a bonus section vibe, but more chaos. And also in the middle of that, we try to answer, kinky questions for folks who are watching live
and wanna ask their questions. So that is this Friday. For podcast listeners, literally the day that this episode goes live for you, 09:30PM eastern till eleven. We used to not really have a an official cutoff time and then would just like end around midnight. We're just too old for that now. We're very tired. We ended eleven now. So, yeah, that's that's the that's the stuff. That's those are the announcements. Okay. Let me get into our notes. We have notes? We have notes.
So the reason we're doing this episode is because we had more than one question in our last Ask Us Anything, q and a, long episode, not to be confused with our Monday q and a episodes where we answer a single question. And it was about twenty four seven. And, Total Power Exchange, aka TPE, you will often see it. Every time I see TPE, I have to go, wait. Wait. That's right. Total Power Exchange. Total Power Exchange. It's like when I see e n m. I have to go, wait. What? And then
it goes, oh, I go, oh, yeah. Ethical nonmonogamy. I just don't walk around with a lot of acronyms in my head, you know? I think about them. Okay. I tend to think in I tend to think in full words. I don't usually think in acronyms. And I realized that if we've done this, it's been a hot ass minute, and it certainly was never to talk about total power exchange because I think even I had misconceptions about what that specific term could be and
could mean. And in the middle of answering that question from folks during that episode, I was like, I I'm I can't take the time I want to even think through what I think about this topic. So here we are. So the one thing I did first and foremost to make sure that I had some kind of work and knowledge and I thought what I thought was the thing was probably the thing is I made sure to look up Total Power Exchange. Because if you ask me what twenty four seven is, I got that. We live
it. We live our version of it. Total Power Exchange was like, am I misunderstanding? I came across some sources that made me roll my eyes. I did not include those. I came across a couple of sites where I was like, even if this is not exactly specifically how I would define it, this is good info. I have linked it in the places for anybody who wants more perspectives on specifically Total Power Exchange.
So the way it is commonly I'm gonna air quote that cause commonly is based on what I personally have seen. That does not mean other people don't talk about it other ways in other places. Commonly, total power exchange tends to be defined as the power exchanges where the dominants have all of the control. And the way it is typically defined, all of the control, is almost at a micromanagement level, where a submissive does not sit, stand, leave the room without
the permission of the dominant. And I think that's way too narrow of a definition. And as with many terms and labels, that's really the inherent problem is the air quote commonly understood definition, even if that's not your specific definition of it, is way too fucking narrow. And as with everything, it's a spectrum of things. And so I just kinda wanna talk about it. I consider us, and we consider us, twenty four seven. I do not consider us total power exchange. Do you? Why why?
Here's why. I do have a reason for that. Okay. Because based on how I think of total power exchange and only not that narrow definition I just gave, it's because we have one area of our life where power exchange Doesn't mean that. Has no say. And it's and for me Mhmm. And that's parenting for anybody who's new here. Yeah. If we did not have that, I would say we're total power exchange, but not in
the way most people think. And see, to me, kind of looking at it to me, when talk about something like, total power exchange, to me, now you're talking, like, things like high protocol and, you know Oh, there's lots of rules that you have to follow and there's Yes. And again, I think that's another part of the spectrum of what it can
be to be total power exchange. Because there are absolutely people out here in relationships where they're in well, if we understood what all their nuance is, that's total power exchange, But they might not have And they have a lot of rules because I think that in some of those This is subjective, but a air quote strict power exchange. If it's gonna be total, there probably has to be a lot of
rules. Here's why I would classify us if we if everything came through our power exchange as total power exchange because here's the thing. It's the same reason I classify us as twenty four seven. You are always the decider. Outside of parenting, there's not a decision that gets made in this house that you have not either had your hand in, pre approved whatever I might do, or directly said yes or no.
Let's be real. I don't usually go asking questions where I think the answer might be no. I know better. But you know what I mean? Yeah. And do I think that's a very loose perspective of total power exchange? Yes. Do I think that that is a definition that a lot would not fit a lot of people's feelings about or understand or vibe? Abso fucking lutely. But that goes back to what we've said many times anytime we have to talk about a label or a term, which is
words do have meanings. Yes. And we should understand those general meanings. But within kink, you can make the term, if it suits you, fit you. You don't twist yourself in the knots to fit the term. So my understanding of total is that there's no part other than parenting. There's no part of our life that you don't have say in. You don't have, if you want it, total control. Now twenty four seven, I classify us as twenty four seven for
that way as well. Okay. But the way I have seen it defined by others makes sense. And, again, I think you can use this term the way that suits you best. But, typically, the way I see twenty four seven defined is that for people in twenty four seven, which is this true for us as well, there's no point where we just, like, take off our I don't take my sub hat off and and I'm not submissive. Right? It goes back to, I think, the whole argument of they're not argument, but the
oh, I can't think of the word. But basically that for some people, kink is an activity. And for some people, especially specifically power exchange, it is their identity. So we don't have to be doing a kink thing. We don't have to be actively in our power exchange. We are still in a power exchange relationship Mhmm. All the time. Right? Yes. So that's how I think of twenty four seven. And I think a lot of people think
of twenty four seven that way. But when I was looking through talking about total power exchange, the ways of few people who I did not link to because I just didn't like that overall vibe. I was like, no. They were like, oh, Total Power Exchange, is when you're twenty four seven. So they conflated Total Power Exchange and twenty four seven as being identical. Do I think that if you're in total power exchange, you are twenty four seven? Yeah. Because how can
you not be? Mhmm. But I think you can be twenty four seven like we define it, and I can't call us total power exchange because we you don't have total control because of the one thing where I you know, we're equals. But I I absolutely agree that there there is an overlap. Absolutely. Absolutely. I still can't decide who's the umbrella. Is twenty four seven the umbrella and total power exchange comes under? Is total power exchange the umbrella? And like, I still Everything
falls under that. Because I you know, I think most people if depending on how they feel about the terms and how they define them for themselves, there are plenty of people who thinking about it that granularly. Right? Might go, oh yeah, well we are total power exchange because there's no part of our life our power exchange doesn't touch, and there are gonna be other people out there who can relate to there's no part of our life the dominant partner does not have some say over.
That to me is total power exchange. Yes, you can swing the whole other way on the graph, and it can be a dominant who makes every decision for their submissive. And I think even with that, there's there's fluidity because I can see it being that a dominant make has made a lot of decisions, and those are rules that submissive follows. And then you get to the other end of that, and it's that micromanagement where that specific does not move unless their dom tells
them to. And that is something that we have witnessed in two cases. I think it is the exception not the rule. I I personally if somebody asked my opinion and y'all didn't, but I give it for free. It's not something I would recommend anybody strive for unless, man, you just feel a fucking calling for it. Like, it's gotta be like beating a drum in your chest. You gotta do it. The Jumanji drums are like in your head, I've gotta do this.
Right. Because I just that level sort of requires a person, the submissive, to be willing to give up everything on certain levels with the trust and and knowledge that they'll be taken care of, but it also does not seem to acknowledge from the little bit I've seen the reality that what happens if the dom is incapacitated? What if the dom can't speak? What if
the dom's in in the hospital? What if the dom's so sick they're, like, just puking into a bucket next to their bed that There's no giving, like what are the the fail safes? Yeah. The fail safes, I I think that is something that needs to be talked about ahead of time. I mean, if if you are going to to do a a total power of change and it is going to be that narrow And highly managed. And highly managed, you have to you have to have that in there just like we have a tough
love clause. Yes. Yes. Okay. Because you can't be in control of everything if your control harms us or you. Right. So, you know, the the same thing goes for that. There there has to be a fail safe. Yeah. It's the only word I can think of. Yeah. You know, to to cover that if it happens. Mhmm. You know, when I think about you know, I because I've seen it. I've seen the a little bit of derision. Fuck fuck the person with that, who looks at us and was like, you can't be
twenty four seven. There you don't seem to have a lot of rules. I seem to have a lot of leeway. Yeah. Well, it's because and this is what I would recommend for anybody who is interested in that kind of dynamic, but thinks it it's too much. It's too overwhelming. They don't wanna go to that end of the spectrum where it's micromanagement. Neither do we. Right? But for folks who are interested in, like, living their power change and it being
incorporated into their whole life Mhmm. You know, it's a lot of it's ongoing negotiation, but it's a lot of negotiation. And there's a lot of when I say upfront, this occurs all the time, but there are moments in time Mhmm. Where the rules are negotiated and understood so that for a dom like JB who does not have the time, inclination, or willingness Yeah. Or mental capacity, because I
don't blame you. I couldn't either, to watch me every moment of the fucking day, nor do I don't want anybody breathing down my neck like that. Thank you very much. I would like to still love him at the end of a fucking day. But if he is the reason I'm overstimulated, it's gonna be tough. You know, we baked that in so that the I understood what my behavior needed to be. I understood what I was what was expected of me. As I personally am inclined to do, and I know a lot of people dom or sub
who do this, I take on extra. I do more than was negotiated because JB allows me to, but also because I want to. I want to take care of him in that way. I want to serve in that way. But the you gotta do this no matter what stuff, we are not talking about it every damn day. Nobody's got time for that. Jimmy does not have time to follow me all day long going, did you do the thing? Did you do the thing? Fuck that shit. We set the expectations early. We keep
the lines of communication open. That's the other thing I think that people get wrong about. It would be both twenty four seven and total power exchange because it would be unrealistic otherwise. Needing to interject with air quotes in real life, needing to, like we did for a few years, go on autopilot, which is what I like to call it. And I think even if you need to take a beat to pause the power exchange for any length of time, You know, there are too many people who
would say that's not 20 fourseven. That's not total power exchange. And I would go back to, in those moments, do you each individually still feel and know yourself to be Dom and Sub? I think you can at least make the argument that no matter what the activities are, at that point, you are still twenty four seven. The physical acts of your power exchange may have to stop. But, I mean, think about it
this way. Mhmm. What happens if you are in that more highly managed type of total power exchange, and I go back to Dom is puking guts up sick. Dom is in hospital. Dom's got a broken leg and can't follow you. Dom's got, you know, depression and literally cannot function. Right? Like, do you just stop being a submissive in that moment? Do they just stop being a dominant and No. No. No. No. And, you know, I knew one couple who did this years ago. Mhmm.
For lack of better terms, I'm gonna call it they had a backup dom. Oh, wow. K. Well, this was a good friend of theirs. It wasn't like somebody they randomly Yeah. It wasn't a little bit random. It was somebody that that they knew that in case the big d got sick, got incapacitated Right. You know, God forbid died, there was somebody there so the submissive just wasn't left floundering. Right. And to help them ease into what transition and whatever whatever.
And that's the kind of thing like, that is that is the only thing that makes sense to me two things make sense to me. That is one of them. If you're gonna go with that really highly managed, lots of rules, lots of Mhmm. Direct engagement from the dom. Right? You what's the fail safe? Also, I think if that either is not an option or that just doesn't work or maybe even if it does, there have to be real life conversations about, you know, subs, especially if you're in a situation where
your dom has financial control. Because see, financial stuff can either be seen as a service and you have total control. Maybe not control, but, like, your fingers are in the money. Or the one that's more stereotypical, but I don't know how common. The Dom has financial control, if you even play with financial stuff at all. Right? Whoever is not the one with their fingers and the money and the accounts needs to know where to get to that information.
You know, early days in us doing the podcast and people would talk about twenty four seven and somebody would say that their ideal situation is as a submissive. They never have to think about it. They never have to touch it. They never have and they're completely taken care of. And I'm like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But do you know how to log in? Do you know what your bank is? Do you know how to pay the bill? Like, you can't you can, to me, the best way to mitigate risk because this is
a situation where this is very risky. Like, people can do it, and some people do it because they're fucking predators and abusers to begin with because this is a way to take advantage of somebody. You get them under your absolute and total control and then cut them off from everything. That's I mean, it's that is the thing you have to guard against. Like, this is not a thing brand new relationships ought to be doing or considering.
You can think about yourself in kind of a twenty four seven way if you want to inhabit your identity all the time. But if your goal is to be highly managed and to have lot, you know, the domed have lots and lots of control, that's not a new relationship thing. That's a we've been to fucking gather for a long time, and there's a lot of trust. And we know how each other operates. You know? We've been through shit together, and we still like one another. You know what
I mean? Like, because there's gonna come a day where, you know, the dom's not in control or Mhmm. The thing that gets forgotten, because not always, I'm sure, but in most cases in these kinds of relationships, that sub provides service. Maybe they don't consider themselves a service sub but they are providing a lot of effort and work and labor in that relationship. Well, doms, what happens when your sub is incapacitated? Do you know how to make a sandwich? I hope to fuck you do.
Do you know how to do the things your sub does for you that you can't not do? Like, if what if you did say, well, sub, you're gonna pay the bills. You're gonna you're gonna come talk to me. We're gonna I'm gonna decide things, but you do the physical act of getting the bills paid. Do you know how to log in and pay your electric bill? Because that sub is out of commission for any time. You're gonna be sitting in the dark. Okay? These are the things where I am the killjoy.
The fantasy of total power exchange, the idealized version in somebody's head is gonna run smack into reality at some fucking point. And there's certain parts of reality you can't prepare for. Like, you can kind of imagine it, but maybe you don't wanna imagine it or you know it's a possibility, but you're like, no. That won't happen to us. I'm too fucking anxious for that shit. My risk assessment level is is like, everything's risky to me. Okay? Everything's a potential problem to me.
So I got a lot of questions. Other folks don't look at the world that way. I'm gonna say if you naturally don't think of the risks, I'm gonna say and that I am begging you to think of the risks. What happened just think in best case scenario. What happens if it if, you know, it's just the flu? What happens if it's just a broken leg? That's not great, but that's better than
in the ICU. Like, I'm I'm not trying to, like, depress anybody, but what do you do if you can't do the thing that you were supposed to do in a situation where there's this much control? Which is why I love the version of power exchange that we have figured out for ourselves. Because, look, you're not allowed to to leave this, earthly plane without me. We're going out like Thelma and Louise. Nope. Hey. My kids have already gone. Mom, you're not gonna be right. And they said, when? And I said, if,
you know, mister John goes first. I was like, no. If not when, if we're going together. The oldest looked at me like I was kinda crazy, but also with understanding of, yeah, you're not gonna survive already. Not mentally. I will not be mentally well. But, like, I know mentally, emotionally, I will not function well if you are not in my life. But because of the life we've set up for myself for ourselves, I can pay the bills. I can call somebody to
come fix something if it's broke. Right? Like, you have the control. Mhmm. You have the decision making power. Yeah. But I still have enough autonomy that I I can function in ways that work for me. You have access to every account I have. Well, I took over as a a service the money Well, true. During during the the dark times. Yeah. Because I was desperate to, like, protect your
mental health as much as possible. What I'm saying too is, you know, any account that I have anywhere regardless of what it is, you have access to it. We know each other's, every I think everybody does this except people who are, like, way tech savvier and more paranoid. You have kind of a standard password you kinda use in most places. Maybe you change the numbers or the special character. We have, like, three that we rotate through, two or three,
and we know them. But also, you have created for things that only you really access because only you need them. I know where to go find the password. Right. I I know how to get into your email. I sure should know how to reset a password and can probably guess what that password is if you forgot to write it down. But we're just you know, that to me, that's how this kind of stuff works. I don't wanna get into his account. I don't need to. But if something happens, I
could. You can. Right? We're not gonna all sit here dark, either hot or cold depending on the time of year, and hungry because one of us is unable to do our highly selective function in this house. And that's the thing I caution with any level of total power exchange, any level of twenty four seven. You know, we've we did an episode ages ago about codependence, and I think that's when we learned the term interdependence.
And we are absolutely dependent upon one another, but we are also aware that we wouldn't want to, but we could minimally function on our own. That's this thing that partners in these situations have to be aware that they can do. Mhmm. You know? Which is why I would give a lot of side eye to somebody very young pulled into a total power exchange with lots of micromanagement and lots of decisions made by probably the
older, more experienced partner. That would freak me the fuck out on behalf of a very young person. Because my question if you were my kid's age, 19, 20, I'm a be like, how do you know how to pay the bills? Do you know how to do have you ever had that experience of being independent enough that you can kinda, like, fumble through life like the rest of us. Right? That, you know, we talk what was that
same episode that q and a? Somebody asked about age gaps, and I tend to be kind of hands off on age gaps because we're all supposed to be adults. But you really wanna get my attention and make me worried for somebody? Tell me about a total power exchange where that one person has no lived experience as an adult. And they were roped into that. That's fucking predatory. You know? Because now, yeah, it's real easy to be trapped in a situation like that. And people God knows. I think we have
all heard stories. We likely all know somebody and or we are somebody who has found themselves in relationships where they got trapped and they were old enough and they had they had autonomy and knew how to, like, be a functional adult on their own and they still got trapped. So total power exchange does it's not come without its risks. And that is the like, people romanticize it. Like, oh, yeah. I'm always on my knees. I'm always on my collar. I'm
always doing this. And I'm like, okay. But do you raise children? Anybody got a job? Anybody got a job with a boss they don't like? Anybody got a job with an asshole boss that makes you work? You know, like, how is this working in the real life? Are you having the conversations to plan for real life instead of that romanticized airbrushed black and white erotic photography version of Total Power Exchange that many of us are sold. Excuse me. So yeah.
Kim says in live chat, while I'm dealing with menopause brain, I'd love twenty four seven TPE just because it would come with lists and rules that I can write down. Guess what? You could do something like that. You'd have to take the time to negotiate it ahead of time. Right. But you you could see, that's the thing that I think is more doable personally. You're free to disagree. Is that you plan the relationship as as highly managed as you want it to be.
Mhmm. But you plan it ahead of time and and understand the expectations because any power exchange of any flavor, everybody should understand the expectations. Fuck down and refer to them as needed. It's I think that gets a little harder when life is a little bit more there's more up and downs in life.
Like, if if folks are somehow in in this economy still working the same job for thirty years and the same schedule and they know what they're doing day in and day out and you have that sameness to your life, it could be very easy to plan something that's more highly managed, which I think is the term I'm I'm just going with when we talk about total buyer exchange, because there's predictability in it. Right? But
may maybe I'm projecting. I just don't know how many people have that much predictability in their life. Certainly not in this economy. You know? So that's where sometimes for some people, I think total power exchange falls apart because there's an unpredictability to life. Mhmm. So planning ahead can be difficult. Or if I came to you all day long, hey, daddy. What do you think daddy. What do you think of that? Hey, daddy. Can I do this? Hey, daddy. Can I go here?
You would be so fucking done with me. Part of that's personality, though. But if we tried to have the total power exchange that I think would fit best for us, which is what I'm suggesting for Kim, which is plan all those rules that you're willing to live by and that you want and all that control that your partner might want ahead of time and just make it routine, make it part of your day so there's less back and forth, back and forth. But there will be times when it wouldn't
be able to it wouldn't work. Right? That that chaos factor. Jamie's gonna be done with me after the end of the day of that many questions. Mhmm. Anybody who has raised small children, you remember you remember that feeling where every other word was why? Why? What? How does this? Why is this? By the end of the day, you're like, I my brain's leaking out of my ear. I don't know why the sky is blue, and I'm not even gonna Google it right now.
To me, that's what it could be for people who are trying to force a certain type of power exchange that does not take into account the unpredictability and chaos that that life can bring. I and I'm not there's somebody out there going, but I fucking love that. Come ask me 80 questions in a row. I'm happy for you and maybe you can make that work. That would work for you. And there are people who are built for that Right. Who can do that. I am not one of those
people. No. You're not. Okay. No. I No. I And I know it, and I admit it. And I think that's where these are the kinds of conversations to have, and I think that's another Mhmm. Factor in broadening our understanding and our our definition of total power exchange. It's just like our our a lot of people conflate total power exchange in twenty fourseven. It's one and the same. So when I say we're twenty fourseven, people go, but but JB's not controlling every
movie yet. Because that's not how we define the twenty four seven. Right. Twenty four seven to us, using literal definitions of words, we're not making shit up, is that we are always, every moment of the day, daddy and baby girl. Do we tamp it down when it's more appropriate to try to, like, blend in with the vanillas? Sure. You know? Or to be we gotta be a parent? Absolutely. But there's not a moment the moment we can put put that mask down and be ourselves, we're back to it. Right.
I think that another tell me what you think about this. Mhmm. I think another it's not a misconception because there is a place for it. But I think another thing that too many people believe of Total Power Exchange and twenty four seven is that there have to be a lot of fucking rules. Now, highly managed power exchange? Yeah. Yes. In some form or fashion, however you decide that. But, I mean, technically, I have one basic rule, and that is I have I can say
I have to be polite. Mhmm. I mean, does that rule get, like, bent when we're in the middle of, like, the kind of arguments where we're like, who are when this happens? Uh-huh. Yes. My righteous anger is not polite. Ew. But you don't push me to righteous anger. I No. Once every couple of years, mad. The other things I do are tasks, are routines, our expectations. You could classify those as rules, sure, but we are not a highly managed
power exchange. No. And and we actually kinda tried that in the beginning. We we've sucked at it so bad. Yeah. And and the thing with that was, you know, the that was the type of dynamic I was familiar with. That's what I came into lifestyle learning and and, you know, having had at some point myself and Yeah. You know, so that's what what I was trying and and that's something too, you know, you you can try this, you can you do your TBE twenty four seven and and, you know, if it's not working
change it up. Right. Change it up, you know, don't be afraid to do that. You can. No one's gonna come out and no one's gonna pop out from around the corner and say you're doing it wrong. Right. And anybody on the Internet who tells you they're doing it wrong, please just delete, block, mute Right. Make them go away. Mhmm. This goes to a thing I said to you today and I think it might be its own episode at some point because I am in love with the fact that I
came up with this. I don't I did not invent these words. Somebody else just probably said it. But we were talking about I was like, kink, all parts of kink, power exchange, all of it. It is highly customizable. Mhmm. It's completely customizable. The only three requirements requirements, communication consent and risk assessment. You have to know what the risks are and then use your own threshold to decide if you're willing to accept that risk. But even those things are customizable.
I literally just finished a fucking workbook on communication and I made myself crazy because I was like, there's all these caveats I can put in here about how here's the broad strokes of communication, but also, like, you know, there's so many ways to do it so that it is effective for you. That is true of every facet of kink. And the problem is too many folks come across these one true wearers, these real ways, these right ways. And it stunts that ability to think creatively.
Now I say that as somebody who gets overwhelmed with too many options, and I know I'm not the only person out there like that. So sometimes what we need are examples absolutely to see what is possible. But the there are too many people who get stuck and think I have failed at kink. I can't do twenty four seven. I can't do total power exchange. I can't do this. I'm
not a real that. I'm because you're trying to make this thing that you this very limited definition, you're trying to fit it instead of making it fit you. That is true of every fucking aspect of this, including what we're talking about today, which is twenty four seven and total power exchange. I do not worry about the what the world thinks about our relationship, even though I put it on the Internet twice a week, because it works for us and we are very comfortable and there was a word I wanted.
Content? That and can't think of the word. In what we have, we Yeah. Like, there's there are no doubts for us. There's no doubts for the words that we use. There's no doubts for the way we express ourselves in our relationship. There's no doubts for that. Now, did we, like, meet one another online and just poof? It was like the fuck no. No. Our power exchange has been through multiple iterations years. Partly every time I think because I had to. You know, we started, sir and
you tried pet, that didn't work. Sir and little one, and then it was sir and baby girl, and then it was daddy and baby girl. Mhmm. And And then we've been daddy and baby girl the whole time, but we went from long distance relationship where we were hardly ever in the same room, to trying to live together and we try to highly manage all these rules, all this shit power exchange. That crashed and burned.
We reconfigured it and relaxed things and just kind of went instead of it for us, I think, worrying about all the things we do, let's just focus on who we are and how we relate to one another in our power exchange. That's, I think, a little bit more meaningful to both of us Yeah. More than the the actual activities. Mhmm. And even that has adjusted over the years because when we first moved in together in 2014, had a three, almost four year old, and so then a
seven, almost eight year old. That's a different life than teenagers who can be left alone at home. Or, you know, when you become the chauffeur of a of a child and are taking them here, there, and yonder. You know, all of those transformations in, like, all of our life affected our power exchange. And then as we have willingly put on the Internet for literal fucking years, then parts of our life imploded. That absolutely
changed Yeah. The powertrain. And now here we are, our whole shtick this year is we're trying to get it back and reconnect. And and, you know, the whole thing with the with the whole twenty four seven and and the TPE, you know, it's it it changes, it grows, it evolves, and and that's something, you know, if if you reach a point you say, oh my gosh, this isn't working, this isn't, you know, we failed. No, you haven't failed. You need
to change time to change it up. You know, we are not the same person we were five years ago, ten years ago, fifth, you know. Right. You know what I'm saying? So it it only goes, you know, kind of hand in hand that if we change, what we're doing is gonna change. Right. As our life circumstances have changed. Right. You know, when we went from having little kids who slept very deeply to teenagers who are up a lot longer than we are, certain things changed. Right? Right.
When we were parenting younger kids who had lots of questions, but they weren't, like, nosy about what we were doing. Right? They just thought that was normal. That's how their parents behave, so that's how life is. To teenagers who get to see more of the outside world and go, why are you doing it though? Like, there are there are and I'm using parenting as the example, but every part of life does this. Has your health changed over any time? Guess what? You already know
it's impacted you. Right? It's impacted your relationships. It's changed how you relate to another and or what you're physically doing together and how your relationship is structured. And I say as a person who only likes the change that I decided was a good change and planned for and, bought all the supplies for. Those are the only changes I really like. Chain having to change things in your power change because your life circumstances have changed Mhmm. Like you just said, it's not a
failure. No. It is the natural progression. And the the whole time for us since we've lived together, we're we've been twenty four seven. And this the nature of our power exchange has shifted in all kinds of ways. I'll I'll say again, And I guess it'll be true, when the kids are, like, self sufficient. They're, like, living their own lives and paying their own fucking bills. Maybe then we'll call ourselves total power exchange because the only reason I don't consider us
that is because of that one fact. With the kids. Yeah. And parenting is is a not as a big a part of our life as it once was, but it's still a good chunk of it that there are times I have to be fully autonomous to just go, yeah, that's what we're doing, and then catch him up later and hope he's okay with it. Which I mean, that you know, damn. You know what's funny about that? On one hand, I don't have a single fucking problem with that because they're they're our kids and we gotta take
care of them. On the other hand, is this submissive who just considers you the decider all the time? Whew. There's some anxiety there. Like, what if he really doesn't like what I decided or did? For us, this won't be true for everybody. I know. But for us, we tend to be on the same page about things and we are not overly precious about our own fucking ideas. If I can make the case for why doing it this way when JB would never have chosen that makes fucking sense, he's like,
okay. That makes sense. If he can get through my issue with anything changing that I'm unprepared for and and my feelings about that and tell me, hey, I did this but here's why, and this is the outcome. And I can see it. I don't I don't need to argue my point. I trust him. That's that's a big part of it. I fucking trust him. Just make the decision. Make sure the kid makes it out alive. Okay?
Yeah. But it is a very weird feeling to me, which is why I think that based on how we look at these things and define our relationship, I would be perfectly happy with total power exchange minus, you know, if parenting wasn't an issue.
Sure. Sure. You know, part of it is I I think my personal opinion, if anybody asked, is if you are parents or raising children, I don't care, guardianship, whatever, that is to me, minimum, the one aspect that should not be power exchange because one partner does not always know best in any situation but definitely that situation. Right? In my case, I have been taking care of these children from literally they spat out of the womb. Okay? I almost shot the one across the room. He
was so close. It was it was a wild story. I am not abdicating that responsibility. I'm not handing that responsibility to anybody. I will share that responsibility. The rest of my fucking life? Psssh. Please somebody take responsibility for it. I don't think I can be trusted. And and yet, I we neither one of us at this point in life want a highly managed total fire exchange. We don't that does not work for us. No. It it doesn't fit our life right now. No. It doesn't fit our personalities,
though. Mm-mm. You know what's funny? We love to be together. We get kinda lonely for one y'all, we live together. We work together. We we work at our house. Like, we don't go anywhere practically without each other. We are 24 fucking seven more together. And yet, when our day kinda pulls us apart just in different parts of the property,
we'll be like, oh, I missed you. Like, we want to be together, but there are parts of our personality and parts of our life that it we're not gonna get anything done if we are constantly up each other's ass. And so I say that to say for the person out there who's like, well, I
thought I wanted twenty four seven. There's something about that appeals to me, but this one example I've seen, I can't do that and I don't like that, so clearly I don't like twenty four seven or I don't like total power exchange. Maybe you don't. Maybe you don't. But maybe it's just your definition's been too narrow and you're not customizing it for the life you have. You want or what works for you. Yes. Not one of us has to justify our fucking power exchange and our kink life
to another goddamn soul. Okay? The The only person who has to be in agreement with you is the person you're in the relationship with. Right. You know, I highly recommend if you do go to the virtual summit, please, please, please, please watch, Rah Rah's session on comparison. I don't know what what words she's gonna say, but I know she's gonna tell you to stop fucking doing that because
comparison is the thief of fucking joy. And that I don't I don't like, like, pithy little sayings, but that one's true. Too many people are looking at what other people do and going, well, I can't do it exactly word for word like that, so clearly I'm doing it wrong. Or you're coming across the grotesque people online are like, this is the one true way. And if you don't do it this way, you're doing it wrong. Fuck them. I hate them so much. Or or you get, I want exactly what they have.
We used to get that a lot, and I would always go, no. You do you really don't. We have an episode in our archives from five or six years ago. I literally said, please watch out for those hashtag relationship goals. Like and I used us as the example because it was happening a lot at the time. I was like, no. No. No. No. We're we're wrecks. Okay? We got our own fucking issues. Please don't try to be exactly like us. Be whatever the best scenario is for you
and your relationship. That's what you need to do. Yeah. So let's try a recap. Okay. Twenty four seven in the broadest sense of the word means there's no real stop to who your you are, your identity, your power exchange. Even if the activities die down, even if you need to pause because somebody got hit by a car on their motherfucking motorcycle and your life sort of imploded all at once. Right? But I'm not bitter. You hold that close to the vest, don't
you? We're traumatized. Yeah. Look, I would be I'd be a wreck if I didn't let it out, so we're just gonna have to let it out, and I'll never get over it. So broadly speaking, twenty four seven just means your power exchange is not something you turn off and on and it's not maybe maybe it's not bedroom only. You know? It kind of comes out into other parts of your life. It inhabits other parts of your life in whatever way makes sense for your life, and in a meaningful way to you
and your partner. So that in some way you're like, yeah 20 fourseven this is who we are to each other. Are there a lot of rules? I don't know. Are there a lot of activities? I don't know. Do you have to ask your dom for permission on all things? I don't know. That's for you to decide based on the life you live. Total power exchange is twenty four seven, but it means, in my mind, there's not a facet of your life that is not governed by your power exchange on some level, some level.
And truly, the only reason I don't consider us that is because of the parenting. I'll just say it 85,000,000 more times to really drive the point home. But you can define that for yourself. You might have a similar setup to us where we have the parenting thing. We're co equals there. That there's no there's compromise. There's no, you know, one overriding the other. But everything else you do and you might go, but that's total power exchange to us. That's fine. I'm not gonna tell you how
to define it for yourself. But total power exchange, my point is, it is much more and has the capacity to be much more than those highly managed, shit ton of rules, get permission for absolutely everything, every moment of the day kind of things. You can have that. You can work towards that if that if that's what you want and you can make it work with your life. But it is less than that as well. In whatever way makes sense to y'all.
None of us need to be walking around here justifying how we've you know, put together our power exchange for the life we're leading right now because nobody else is living our fucking lives. Nobody else has our personality. Nobody has else has our mental illnesses, our physical disabilities, our you know, our jobs, our bills, our so yeah. That to me, that's 20 fourseven and
that's total power exchange. And I guess my my conclusion, tell me if you agree, twenty fourseven is the umbrella, and total power exchange fits under the umbrella. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Look. I think reasonable people can agree to disagree. I think you can define that anyway. You could go, no. No. Total power exchange is the umbrella, and but that's just how my brain is looking at it. Looking at it. Yeah. Yeah. Because total power exchange, in my mind, is always twenty four seven
in some way. Right? Because if it's a total power exchange Mhmm. Then that the Dom has some level of control and power totally all the time. But twenty four seven does not have to be total power exchange. I think it's a little bit of a mind fuck. And quite frankly, what I would say is I don't think there's a right or wrong answer. You're right.
The only right or wrong is see looking at one example and then deciding because you can't do that one version that you can't do it or you're doing it wrong. Or to look at somebody else's example example and it doesn't match yours and to think they're doing it wrong. So that's where we go wrong with it. I think Mhmm. Again, because, man, there's always somebody somewhere who gets real fucking snarky. Yes. Words mean things. Yes.
But, also, you can tailor that. There is some wiggle room in what these terms mean and what they mean to you as an individual. It also does mean that you end up explaining yourself more. When you tell somebody you're twenty four seven and you're in a conversation with them, you might then need to go, this is what this means to us. Right? But it's only if you want to, quite frankly. I, silent in the live chat, says maybe they're both umbrellas, but you've got two hands. I
kinda like that. I'll take any analogy because I'm not good at those. I do I think it's that's one of those weird ones where I if you same, okay. If you don't, okay. Yeah. As long as it makes sense for your situation. That's that's what I would say. There you go. I made myself hot well, I mean, it's hot outside. Mhmm. But I I raised my blood pressure, and I made my my throat sore. And they said it was gonna be a, high pollen day. Mhmm. And they are absolutely correct.
Yeah. My white car is yellow. Yeah. And I saw somebody driving a dark colored car, maybe it was black, and it was yellow. Yes. Now I can tell my eyes not won't don't aren't my eyes keep watering. Mhmm. Mhmm. So did we help? Did we annoy? Is it clear as mud you I don't know. All I want is for somebody out there to go, okay. Okay. I can do this the way I want. I'm not wrong. I didn't do it wrong. You know, this is achievable, whatever. And then I want somebody else who's like,
oh, wait. It shouldn't be like this hellscape that I'm living in. It can be different. Yes. It can. But yeah. Because it's all fucking customizable. We're gonna do that episode. It'll be a ranty one, I'm sure, that has no real general point other than we'll play a drinking game over how many times I say customizable. Just like we should have played a drinking game with this one how many times I said highly managed, but then we probably somebody
gets sick. And I don't need that kind of liability, so maybe we shouldn't do that. I don't know. Anyway Anyhoo. Do you have anything else you would like to add? No. You did a good job, girl. Oh, thank you, daddy. I I feel like I've run out of words. I ran out of steam on the topic. Does that help? If people ask more pointed questions in the future, I could see coming back to it because it's a nuanced topic. There's There it there's more to it. There's a lot under
that umbrella. The this we're just talking about the umbrella. Yeah. Yeah. Mhmm. Not the person standing under it. Nope. Or whichever hand they're using to hold whichever umbrella. That's true. I'm not allowed to hold the umbrellas. I, hit other people accidentally on a busy London sidewalk. No. I'm not I don't get to control the umbrella. But I'm a Florida girl. I don't like fucking using umbrellas anyway. Give it five minutes. The rain will stop. Anyway Anyhoo. Gonna do a bonus section.
This one this one a little more off the rails than usual, didn't it? Are we, are we good, girl? You shouldn't ask me that. I'm not in charge of that. Keep it kinky, y'all. And we'll see you next week. Can I talk to the crickets? Yes. That was the fastest move from Keep it kinky y'all to hey, I almost forgot I needed to ask. I'm usually waiting for you to write down numbers. Yeah. Yeah. I I like these this little trick I learned. I know. Only ten years later. What the fuck? Look. Look. Learn late
than never? It proves there's always something new to learn. You can teach an old dog new tricks. I wasn't gonna go there. I'm not trying to get into that kind of trouble today. Thank you very much. It's okay for me. Yeah. You'd you'd be in trouble. Exactly. But if you said it to me, I would just cry. True. Because I yes. I'm getting older, but I I don't know about aging gracefully. Yeah. I don't think I've got it. Yeah. No.
No. I I've I've you know, we we've talked about what we've been going through with Lola a little bit and I, you know, I've, She heard you and opened her eyes. Ditching. And, you know Hi, Lola. I I, you know, when we were going through all that stuff with the vets and trying to find the right meds for her and everything, I was like, you and I, kid, we ain't we ain't nothing about this is graceful for either of us. No. You're aging more gracefully than you realize.
Maybe. I don't know. I mean, do do you have a top of your head that's literally split between your dark your dark side and your My dark your dark side. I mean, the dark side, I don't know if It could go either way. I could Right. Well, that's always been true. And, actually, it's not either way for you. It's always. I could go always, and we know we know. We know. Part of your charm. But but yeah. Yeah. No. I I see it every time I, you know, look at Look in the
yeah. Yeah. Podcast, folks, even if you don't usually watch YouTube video, you're a podcast listener. I'm just saying, go find one one of our more recent videos Yeah. And just look at the top of JB's head. That's all I'm saying. I think there's a little, spot happening here too. Do you want me to tell you that it's been happening for a few years? Yeah. I don't look back there very often. So I look. I'm good though. I figure the back of my head is not my problem. It's somebody else's problem.
I don't have to look at it. I mean, I don't want to be a rat's nest back there. Yeah. No. I've, it's where I like to rub the top of your head, and I'll there's a little bit of, oh, god. Did I did I rub too much? Like, worry stone? Like, did I just polish that brass statue? Like, you're gonna whoop my belly. I'm gonna go away and rub my ham. I wish it worked that way. Fucking hell. Fucking hell. Wish it worked that way. Look.
I'll rub you wherever you'd like to be rubbed, but, you know, what what made that face? You made a face. Yeah. I did. Did you leave the door open? Yep. I've just been screaming about twenty four seven, and we didn't even close the office door. Hopefully, the kid is smarter than we are and just closed their damn door. He he he sits with his headphones most of the time. That child don't hear shit. No. I think it's because he mostly just
doesn't want to. Right. Right. So but, yeah, what kinda I'm I'm I'm sitting here, you know, we're talking, and it's like I'm watching Ella just walk up and and lay down in front of the door. Yes. She's And it and it did not dawn on me. Where she came from? Yeah. Yeah. And then went like, how'd she get in here? I know. She's cuddly enough. I kinda wanna scoop her up and put her in front of the camera, but that would be the time she decides to be her bitch self
and I would just get scars. And I don't really want that, so I'm gonna respect her bodily autonomy and not pick her up without consent. I don't have to, like, give her medication or make her do something that is good for her health, so I'll just leave her the fuck alone. So what else we got going off in the the bonus section? I saw the I said this to the in the butt rub, but I saw the 19 year old yesterday. Mhmm. That was the most one of the most interesting air quote. It was not a visit visit.
It was a mom, I need food and I need to go to Walmart. Can can you come? And I, you know, I was like, yeah. Sure. And I had all the time in the world. Normally, if I go see him in the middle of the week, I'm on a tight ass fucking schedule. I gotta get back. And I was like, no, I got time. I took the day off. I'm working, like, under my own power. I don't have to wait on anybody. He was on top of his game. He was actually awake and showered by the time
I got there. There have been a few times neither were true. And so I'm like, I'm prepared for this to be three, four hour outing. He gets in the car. I let him drive because I just was like, he does not scare me in his driving the way he used to. He's he's learned caution riding a motorcycle, and I appreciate that. But I'm like, I'm fully prepared. He he's a college kid with no fucking money. I'm like, do you want to be fed? I let we can go get lunch. He goes, no.
I'm not actually hungry. He goes, unless you're hungry. And I'm like, I'm actually not hungry. We went to Walmart where look. Spring break in a college town on Tuesday at noon. That's time to go to Walmart. That was the least stressful trip to Walmart I've ever had. Hi, Lobla. That was twenty minutes. We go to Aldi. That was twenty minutes. And then he talked to me for a little bit. Like, he we've ranted and raged at, you know, the current state of our country.
And then he was like, okay. I wanna play Destiny. You can go now. I was like, I see you later. And what I thought was gonna be a three or four hour excursion was, like, two hours tops. I was like, okay. And, actually, it was an hour there and then the drive to and from home. Like, it just it was so short. And I was like, oh, this is actually kinda peaceful. I have the afternoon kinda to just fuck around and do what I wanna do. Yep. I don't know what to do with that kind of power.
We had a and we had a busy beginning of the week. Every day I've woken up this week, I've been like, how is not Friday? It feels like it should be Friday. Yeah. It's not Friday. Yeah. We had a we we had planned on this because, we had a tree service. What? I'm just thinking about how that all went down Monday. Yeah. You know, it it was funny. Had got some estimates to do some tree work in the front front of the house.
Had three very, very well, two very big trees, one medium big tree in the front yard, and it's been reduced to one tree at this point. Which now looks like a broccoli stalk. It does. It's been, so You come down the road, it looks like yeah. It's just the very top cam canopy left right now. Mhmm. Yeah. But, It looked like a mushroom before that canopy was so full. Yeah. Anyway. Anyway,
yeah. It was kinda funny, because the, the fellow I talked to from the company, you know, you told me they've been tied up doing a big job somewhere else. And once they're done, they're gonna, you know, set their schedule and and, you know, let me know when they'll be out. So, Monday morning, we get up, and we're just doing our thing. And I'm I'm expecting I'm gonna get a phone call, you know, tell me or email me and let me know,
you know, when we're on the schedule. I'm in the garage pouring resin, making you know, finishing up paddles for folks. Yeah. And here comes a line. Three It was a convoy. It was a convoy of massive trucks. And at first, I was like, oh, I wonder I wonder whose house they're working on. And then I saw the name of the company. It And I was like, oh, shit. And the first the first truck in the convoy only pulled a little bit past our house. And I was like, oh, shit.
And all these people and all these trucks and the neighbors love to come out when there's some activity. And I'm like, I I'm literally stirring resin. I cannot stop or I'm gonna waste this batch of resin. And I just, from the garage, call JB who's out at the In the backyard in the dining shop. And I go, hi. Tree service company seems to be here? And all I hear is, oh, fuck. From a man who almost never says that word. He comes like, rush now. I mind my damn business, y'all. I stand in the garage.
I watch them all, and I'm stirring resin. And I don't say a fucking word because I know my daddy's coming. They didn't say nothing to me because we get to live in this patriarchal society where I'm the little woman. I wouldn't know anything anyway. And I just and I don't wanna talk to him. I don't stare. And here he comes, like, JB came out like his ass was on fire. Here's the backstory to this. Because the backstory to me is a little it's not nuts, but it's a little nuts. We got quotes
weeks ago. Yeah. Okay? They had done work on our house before. They were our top choice. They ended up being the best price. But they had given we were only doing part of the quote. So JB had to call and go, okay. I don't want the full quote you gave. I want the front yard quote. Okay. We'll have to resend that. You have to sign that. Well, that was like two days before they resent it, and JB electronically signed it, and it gets sent in. Okay. And we had been told you had been told
at that time, okay. Once you get that in, we'll have our girls call you and put you on the schedule. Okay. Well, a week goes by. Then another week goes by. And I'm like, have you heard? He's like, I haven't heard. Then he calls, doesn't get an answer. Then he plays phone tag with a guy for two days. Then dude calls and is like, yeah, we're the whole company's on this massive ass job out of town. We're no we're near our schedule. It's like, so you brought the girls
with you. Like, who's making the schedule? Yeah. And then he says well, Jimmy said, I'll call you. We'll get you on the schedule. No. I mean, they probably clearly got us on a schedule. They just forgot to tell us. Yeah. That we were that we were first on the schedule. Monday morning, bright fucking early. And thank God, like, we are as we get to be as flexible as we need to be. I was more like, I well, I was I would not be pouring all of these paddles. Yes. That is a
paw you're looking at. Yep. Those are hearts. Uh-huh. I'll just be stirring my rest. Yeah. And then that so everybody they were very, efficient. They were very professional. They Yeah. They were little worker bees, and I like that shit. I think that's great. They had a supervisor there who's watching everything. Fine. You did what I need you to do in these situations and you just did all the talking. Perfect. I had to stay in
the background. Y'all steady stirring fucking resin. I had so much resin to do. I'm I'm wearing my, noise canceling headphones that that I got as a business present so I can listen to stuff and, like, protect my fucking ears. And this this is a time to need it if ever there was one. So I'm I'm not focused on anybody around me. I am stirring resin and pouring red. This is what the fuck I'm doing. And something makes me go,
what? And I turn, and old dude who I don't know is in the middle of our garage staring over my shoulder. The The the paddles, doll, where I'm putting resin in them. And I'm like, so, you know, I'm smooth and suave and got my shit together. All I do is just turn and just kinda go and look like, cock my head to the side, tilted the side. I was like, And, yeah, never said a fucking word. I was listening to my podcast
and went back to stirring my resin. I'm pretty sure that guy thinks that's all I do is just stir resin. I had nothing to say. He was, like, on my like, by my shoulder, like, quiet. He did not announce himself. He did not actually speak to me either. I'm not mad about it. I'm not mad about it, but it was still kinda weird. Like, he was just in our in our garage, in our in our garage. The neighbors, they were in all at hissy.
The across the street neighbors were there in a heartbeat making sure that we were not cutting down the pretty tree. The big tree. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, okay. No. We we we decided, with the front with, with all these trees that we had there, and these these storms that have been kicking up, it it's time to reduce the amount of trees around the house. Mhmm. Mhmm. It our our front yard looks very weird now. Yeah. It does. And to to, like, keep the comedy of weird shit going,
it's not errors. Nothing went wrong. That was just kinda all like, what? We and I'm pretty sure this is why the quote was, oh, as painful as it was. We are are gonna have we're supposed to have that day down. The two trees that came down, the stumps grinded. Yeah. Stump grinding it, whatever it's called. Yeah. Grinding. Okay. That machine stopped working. Mhmm. They were gonna come back later that day. They could not come back later that day. They couldn't get it fixed. We're
now two days late. Have you heard from them? Here's what I think is gonna happen. On, like, a random Friday afternoon, they're just gonna roll up and start grinding stumps, and we'll be like So, yeah, there there is there's one stump that's half ground. Yeah. It's all paid for. Fully fucking ass paid for. So they need to get their asses back here and grind my stumps. I'll I'll give them till next week, and then I'll
remind them. I'm demanding that these people come grind my stumps, and that just sounds like an innuendo to me. I don't do you need your stumps ground? Would you like somebody to come grind your stumps too? I could be interesting. Could be interesting. Yeah. Anyhoo. So yeah. It's Yeah. Got other stuff going on too, but save some of it for Friday Yeah. For the hangout. Yeah. I I think I said everything that I
have Yeah. Well, and I I meant to say this at the top of the bonus section and then forgot because I didn't put it in my notes, but I also by the bonus section I'm never referring to my notes anymore. I would have missed it. It wouldn't have mattered. For anybody who was a Patreon member during our membership drive and now no longer is for all kinds of valid reasons, not just because we're probably annoying as fuck. All so proud of myself. All Patreon membership drive perks have been dispersed
out. Things in mail, things in email inboxes. I got it fucking I had to give myself a pretend deadline that only I fucking cared about and then worked solid through the weekend to get it done. But it is done. Yeah. It is done. And in a couple months, that workbook that was a perk, it'll be available, you know, for sale and stuff. But I'm gonna I'm gonna let it, like, rest and sit for a hot ass minute. But yeah. So I did that too. I just wanted to say this, and I thought
this was pretty cool. And the reason it stuck out to me was because years ago, I ran a stump grinder. Okay. And and those things are a bear. Mhmm. K? They'll they'll they get you going. So we really do want our stumps grinded, don't we? It's very fun. Okay. I can do that. But, but anyway, the, apparently, the stump grinders that they have Mhmm. It's remote controlled. Everything's remote controlled. He did not have to be on that machine, hold the machine, and
operate the machine. He did it all by remote control. Can you can you just imagine how many injuries would have occurred from having to hold that fucking thing over the years? Oh my gosh. Yep. But, you know, as somebody who has many, remote controlled stump grinders oneself, I do understand the appeal of remote control. I do understand the appeal. Okay. I think maybe we need to go. And, I've got some more. Remote controlled stump
grinders that I did. Grinding to do. You left you left them on the kitchen not the kitchen. The bathroom sink together. Y'all, I'm gone for three hours, and I come back. And in our bathroom is like it's a different kind of Toy Story is all I'm saying. Okay? Some somebody's stump got round. That's yep. With remotes. I solved them. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Look, I'll be riding the high of making that innuendo work for a long time. I'm a very proud of myself. So anyway Anyhoo. Yeah. Alright.
We will Let, let these folks get on with their day. Go go back to whatever your normal is because I know this ain't it. Yeah. It's fine. It's fine. Okay. Right throat. Thank y'all for, being here. Yep. Especially to the bitter end. Thanks for, tolerating whatever ranty bullshit comes out of my mouth. And we will hopefully see y'all on Friday. Bye bye. Bye.