¶ Life's Funerals
Living with Maidly . Living with Maidly . Living with Maidly . Maidly . Living with Maidly .
Hello , this is the Living with Maidly team . We're live on the roadshow . We're on a bino to Chapel St Leonard's . We are now going to move on to answering listener questions .
You could sound more upbeat . It sounds like we've had a terrible weekend . It's sort of like well you know .
No , no , no , it's been good , We've seen it all . We've seen it all honestly , we've seen it . We've seen a guy eating his tea unbelievably slowly , which doesn't sound that impressive .
We were watching this guy and he put a mouthful of A big shovel of food .
Yeah a pie in his mouth weren't him ?
He ate a potato pie , I think it were , or something like that .
But then it took a minute to finish the mouthful , didn't it ? Yeah ? Yeah , it doesn't sound . You had to be there , you had to be there .
You had to be . There's a lot of things you had to be there .
What other thing that ?
we saw .
We keep seeing the same guy , don't we like every , every place we go .
Yeah , he's good as well . Yeah , yeah . So we went into the car .
You've seen an unbelievable sorry , just unbelievable amount of hen do's as well tonight yeah , honestly , when there's grass on the pit that makes him girlfriend , get yourself a chapel . Loads , absolutely loads of stag do's .
I've never seen the amount of hen do's as I have tonight .
It's not stag do's .
Hen do's , stag do's are big , each to their own , anyone thinking what you're saying , get it wrong and still think that you're right . Thinking what I'm saying , we can work it out and get it straight or say , goodnight , we can work it out . We can work it out . Life is very short and there's no time For fussing and fighting .
My friends , I have always thought that there's a crime . So I will ask you once again Try to see it my way . Only time will tell if I am right or I am wrong . Why is it your way ? There's a chance that we might fall apart before too long . We can't work it out . We can't work it out right questions , right , we'll start .
Real bobby b said I love about real bob B . By the way , he's got Real Bobby B then he's got a trademark next to it , so he is actually the Real Bobby B . Yeah , the Real Bobby B , he said . Instead of messing around with Tufty Club nutsack because he says those boys are sensitive , what about Mildly ?
Yeah , we did it on the spot , which I think some of it . We nicked Tufty's nutsack . He's probably right that is better , but we didn't do it , so we've gone . We are where we are .
Anyway , he's asked what are our funeral tunes ? Carried in mid-service , curtains closed , everyone's out . I'll give you his , because he's like there's no his when he's getting carried carried . He's having Fiesta by the Poes . Yeah , alright , yeah . Then he says number two , he's put Reach S Club 7 . Then he's put a shrug emoji .
He says it does have a special meaning yeah and then enjoy yourself by the specials on the way out , which are really like that , like enjoy that's my favourite of his three . Yeah , it's blatant . So what are you going in then , liam Carried in what are you having .
I'm carried in to Caribbean Blue by Enya . Oh yeah , yeah , and maybe a lot of people don't know that . Check it out .
I'm going to get carried in to Nessun Dormer by Pavarotti . Nice Nessun . This is the one that's hardest , you know , like mid-service the most poignant let's have it reflect on Liam Marley's life so this is probably the hardest it is the hardest one I mean , I'm stealing this from you and I don't know if you still have it here .
We go Asleep . Smiths yeah , by the Smiths I'm tempted with . We did a bit on the karaoke . You might have heard it already , but Don't walk away In silence
¶ Game Show Dreams and Nostalgia
. Yeah , I'm tempted with that . I'm going to sleep right now because we're kind of on the spot .
I don't know what I'm going to do . I don't know what to mess up .
the voice Walk in silence .
Don't walk away in silence .
See the danger , always danger , endless talking , life rebuilding .
Don't walk away .
Don't walk away , walk in silence , don't turn away .
In silence , your confusion away in silence , in silence your confusion my illusion . My illusion walk back , that back , it's okay . Turn front and then die .
Don't walk away see mid there's a couple of asleep is one of mine as well .
I thought you were going to say ? When you said mid , why did you say that ? I thought you were going to say midsummer murders no mid-service , mid-service right , mid-service murders .
Imagine that a brilliant detective show someone murdering someone in mid-service to have funerals , my favourite ever song . I think it's like Push , Come To Show , and I don't think you can have a favourite song because it changes , but as it stands right now it probably got on the nail by Beach Boys .
Yeah , it's a good choice , but I don't know if I'd have that as like a . I don't know , maybe Asleep is one of mine , but I've always , always said russell brand said , before he went mad , uh said he was going to have a sleep as his funeral song .
So I always used to say if he died before me , I can't have it , because I don't want to repeat anybody's funeral sing me to sleep , like russell brand sing me to sleep , so as he stands , I'm going to got on the nose and for me , curtains out , uh , curtains closed , everyone's out .
I'm going to go for a song called farewell fire by boards , the Boards of Canada , which probably people most people won't have heard , but it's like it's a seven minute song , but it fades , so it like gets quieter and quieter and quieter as it goes on .
I would go and if they turn it off halfway through , I'd come back in and say , like like Brent going no , no , no , leave it until the go on my way out .
This is the last time that I will say those words .
I remember the first time , the last time , the last time by Keane fair play good singer .
What's his name ? Tom Chaplin . Matt says did you ever consider Definitely Made Like as a name for the podcast ? We were talking about this earlier about the name of the podcast .
We sort of regret it because people think it's a podcast about richard made like yeah , I don't regret the name if you've followed our journey , but I think if you're new to what we're doing , it probably makes people think I don't really like made late . I don't want to listen to people talk about about living with Maitley , but it's the concept .
It works it works as a title it has always been on TV and we're doing a TV nostalgia we've talked about and I think sometimes this comes across as like a criticism of Peter Kay . We love Peter Kay , obviously . I saw him recently . He's great , but Vic and Bob do a great sketch , which is kind of what we're doing , which is remembering things .
Do you remember ? Do you remember ?
who remembers ?
who remembers old fashioned trousers ?
yeah , so the original title we're going to be . We might have mentioned this before . We're going to be old fashioned trousers .
But who remembers ? We should have called it who remembers in hindsight . But you know yeah , but it , but it were . I'm not like , it's not like where ? Ah , we've got that wrong . I think it still works . But no , we know , definitely , madely , it's good for what it is like .
I think , if we did like a patreon or something like that , then we could call it definitely madely the patreon or something like that .
But yeah , but that that would imply even more , it was a madely based-based podcast , I think .
So now we Now , matt , it's clever and it works , but the answer is no , Because we and actually we've sort of fizzled away from the Maidly content .
We always intended to do a Maidly bit at the start , didn't we ?
Yeah , we always used to do Maidly news at the start , but you know we might have exhausted it now . Anyway , he says are we doing anything to commemorate 40 years which I didn't realise this ? 40 years since the first broadcast of Threads on the 23rd of September 2024 , just before our birthday , because we're both .
If people don't know this , if we've mentioned it before , I was born one day earlier than Liam .
Yeah , 26th 27th of September 82 .
Yeah , so we I mean , look , it's one of my favourite ever things obviously covered it . I think it's fucking brilliant . But I don't think we've got any plans in place . Have we for the 40 year anniversary ? Maybe 50 years ? We'll do it .
Another 10 years we'll think of something we might just reshare the threads we'll drop a nuke on Sheffield , but no , for anyone who hasn't heard it , who's interested in that , we did do an episode on Threads . Go check it out if you like the thing , if you're kind of into the . The memorial , what is it ? The commemoration or the anniversary of ?
Threads we did a full episode on that .
We might reshare that on the day yeah , brilliant film .
And he also . He ends with , like his final question , which is which game show or quiz show would you most like to go on and which do you think you might win ? Little thing about this is our mate , jay , who went on lots of quiz shows . I mentioned him before . He went on some of the answer and he went on national lottery live .
He applied for loads and he actually applied for me and him to go and bargain on , but we never got there . But I don't want to be on TV wearing those fucking white fleeces . You know those like big red fleeces .
We want to buy a vase .
I want to buy a vase . So which game show or quiz show would you like to go on ?
what I would love to go on is who wants to be a millionaire ? I think that's such a great idea . Jasper Carrot .
Jasper Carrot's there . Yeah , jasper Carrot . Jasper Carrot's there , yeah , well , he's not there . Chris Tarrant's there . The concept , though , the concept , concept by Jasper , but .
I think that's such a .
We could do a Major Charles as well , couldn't we ? In the background , I could be going . Is it A ? What was Oasis' first single ? Was it A Wonderwall B ? Superstar Ha-ha .
Yeah , I would love to go on . Who Wants to Be a Millionaire ? I like the 100 to 1 thing , which is a more recent one that I've seen . I've not seen this , yeah . So they ask questions of increasing difficulty to get a pool of 100 down to 1 . I've sort of done some of the later questions that Jodie said to me for . Okay , then try and get this one .
It's done all right . I think I'd have done all right in 100 to 1 .
I think I'd go Crosswits with Tom O'Connor . Remember Crosswits ? Yeah , it's quite hard , but oh , I'll say what I would do . I'd like you have to be a celebrity , but I'd like to do Through the Keel . Is that a ?
quiz . But yeah , I get where you're coming from . Yeah , that was good , yeah .
Who lives in a house like this .
They have a dartboard .
There was always a few red herons in there , weren't there . I hear he's got a few awards for his singing . Who could this be ?
Because the crowd , the audience knew , didn't they ? Yeah , because it was not .
I'm going to say Barry Norman . What's his name ? David ? Yeah , because it would not happen if it said Barry .
Norman . What's his name ? David Frost . He presented it , and then was it Lloyd Grossman after that .
Lloyd Grossman did the voiceover . Ah , and it's Keith .
Lemon now ? Yeah , you're right , yeah , but yeah . So if they were on to something they'd say seems to me like this could be a sporting person , yeah .
Yeah , yeah , oh , he's on to him and he's in the studio and he'll watch Old Woman's Life .
Yeah , that's where it was . Yeah , Not far away .
So I'd like to go on that . I'd like someone to do it like in your house , for instance . We'll get on to that later .
I'll tell you what another one I would love to have done , actually because I think I'm quite good at it Catchphr . What would I like to have done ?
now Got to deal with Muller . Imagine there's a team with Berlin Blade H Muller . Yeah , just him attacking him right halfway through . Right , we've got a message here from what I was still going to call Chimp man .
Just to put it out there . Do you know his actual name ?
He said that no , do you know his name ? Chimpan Chimpan A .
No .
Chimpanay , chimpanay , it's a chimpanzee , yeah I get it .
Yeah , chimpanay , but you never remember it .
No , but I said before that . He said when Anna did Bladespod that it was like replacing Mr Blobby , but basically someone good . So he's getting called Chimpman forever more now .
Yeah , that's fair . But to be fair , anna was very good , so yeah , you know , I mean you bring your .
Woke nonsense from Bladespod .
But you bring your loud interruptions . She didn't grab it to replace you . She had to shout over Ben sometimes .
She's a normal person .
Yeah , yeah , how does it ? He's too normal A normal person .
Yeah , yeah , how does it ? He's too normal . Too sane , right ? Yeah , anyway , he says , do we not regret changing the name of the pod to Truly Madeleine D Play , which I do like ?
See midway through . Do we regret ?
Yeah , name of the pod Truly , madeleine D Play yeah maybe Truly Madeleine . D .
Play . Yeah , maybe , yeah , that could be quite good .
Truly madely deeply . And he also said would you ever consider reviewing the Farmyard Danger film Apaches in its entirety ? We have actually done this . I'm pretty sure we've done this one , anyway , I don't remember this ? Oh it is .
It's when we did public information films and it's when there's credits at the end and all the credits come on and you think , oh , they're actors , they are the actual children who have died in farmyard accidents .
I was getting a call , so it's not counsel right . No , it's kicked back in , hang on .
The next question is from Nav Proper friend of the show .
Actually , nav Brilliant Shares everything , likes everything Genuine . Don't know him . Don't know him , matt .
No , I've never met Nav , but I would love to . He's great . Yeah , he said what sport do you think is best suited to having Richard Maidley as a pundit ?
We should have probably thought about some of these before the question went . What are you thinking ? He's very no , I can't believe that . I think .
¶ Fantasy and Illusion
Imagine good at tennis like saying , oh it's a great serve , great serve , great serve , great serve , fantastic serve . Like shred above the net . Would he be funny horse racing like what really fast , like sort of oh he's going around , oh he's torn he's definitely going to win it .
This guy's in front . Oh he's not . No , he's not won it no , he's not won it .
He's not won it . He didn't win it . We don't know who's won it . Fantastic race , great race , but we don't know who's won it . I don't believe in an interventionist God , but I know , darling , that you do . But , if I did , I would kneel down and ask him Not to intervene when it came to you . Well , not to touch your head your head .
Leave you as you are If you felt that I direct you . Direct you into my arms , into my arms . Oh , love Into my arms . Oh , love Into my arms . Oh , love Into my arms . Ryan says we all know Hulk Hogan is a bullshitter , as we do , but what is the best lie you've ever heard from a friend or a work colleague ? Now , there's loads of these things .
I once worked with somebody I'm not going to give his name . Well , his name was Faith . It turned out he was lying about his own name you know who I'm talking about and he'd come out with absolutely loads of shit . Like he said , like he lent a million pounds to a lord and stuff to keep him ticking out .
He said he had a luxury yacht as well , didn't he ?
Yeah , he lives in a flat at Healy . We shouldn't be knocking that , but you know that's yeah . But he did have a multi-million pound yacht , didn't he ? I may one saw him , steve one handcuffed to a briefcase .
Yeah , I remember something about that . This is how bad this is , so we're laughing at mental illness here , I feel like , because it's like a fantasy .
Yeah , it's troubled , isn't it ? My favourite line from him was he said he was the bodyguard of Freddie Mercury , right , so he worked out his age . Freddie Mercury died in 1992 . He stopped touring in 1986 . So his last . It could only have been really a bodyguard in 1986 , you'd have thought , because he'd like retired to his villa .
This guy would have been 11 when he was Freddie Mercury's bodyguard Elite , though , wasn't he ? Yeah , he would yeah this , honestly , I could do a podcast on this guy , but it's probably not fair . But that is my favourite , because people are like oh yeah , he used to bodyguard for him . He used to body in there , craig . Like did you ?
Yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , magic tour . Oh right , really , I was that old like Teddy's age . All right , fair enough . He walked away , worked it out , got the old calculator out 11 years old .
I remember a guy at school to be fair , I suppose like school age is a bit different but someone saying that they'd left them at home but they didn't want to look like they'd made a mistake so they did a wheelie all the way home as if it were like an exhibition piece on the bike . Unbelievable innit .
People ate that , what's it called ? What's it called ? That fucking Twitter site Didn't happen at the year awards , some of these things that they have on . There are obviously people taking the piss , but at the same time , I know people with that much liars that I can imagine people like thinking these things have happened .
Like I mean , all kogan is a massive liar , but he's not even the top five liars that I've ever met .
I've not met the sort of tragedies , and we've all met these people . Of the people who can believe what they're saying , they're the hardest ones to deal with . So yeah , off the top of my head , I can't think of any great ones other than the wheelie all the way home but yeah , fair enough , fair enough .
Carl says name your dream top of the pops line up . So for me , right , what I'd like is , obviously , I think you get like five acts on , or whatever , on top of the pops .
Yeah . So there's all this sort of chart stuff going on , but we're talking live acts in the studio .
I think the first act I'd have on is it's all in the prime . By the way , not now . The Smiths this charming man I weren't . I bet that were brilliant like these are not the best some of the parts should we do a joint five ?
because I'm not . I'm with that . Yeah , maybe we would disagree on some , but well , I think .
I'm going to disagree with one of mine . What I'm going to think ? You're not going to have Mike Flowers again , are you ? No , no , no what I'm going to have is my number one . We're going to be God Save the .
Queen , let's see what else you're going to have , because I don't know if I can agree with all , do you ?
know , when they go to a video , like they always say , oh , this is a video , yeah , yeah , right . There's two I've got in mind here . One of them is Prince . Don't they say , oh , this album is the war in America or whatever . Let's go and see . I'd like to see Prince live on top of the pops doing . Let my video choices .
See , I'm not sure I can agree with that one , so I might have to differ there .
Are you having Westlife ?
by Backstreet Boys . I know you're taking a piss , but yeah , I might have Westlife .
yeah , make me feel funny , you can't have Westlife on top of the pulse because they're the most bland .
Pink . I might go pink . Is that a bit out there ? You can have pink you can have pink .
Definitely which song .
I like the one . If someone said it's not the karaoke episode , what's the ? You'd be long gone .
I'd stand up . I don't know what you're talking about ?
I'd have a pink song , Is it not ?
I'm coming up , so you better moan .
No , I'd go pink instead of that .
When it goes to the video of like sort of . You know this has just been released . I'd go for because it's my favourite ever music video . I think is those Are the Days Of Our Lives by Queen .
Because I think it's the saddest music video of all time . So if I'm chucking a video in there , I like Mel C and Bryan Adams .
A bit different to Freddie Mercury's last ever appearance .
Equally meaningful in there .
So we need more Performances . I think maybe my favourite ever Top of the Pop performance was Shakespeare's Sister doing no , no , no .
No , not that one .
Uh , I don't care if you talk about me , it's brilliant . Honestly , if you don't know what I'm about , just put in top of the pop shakespeare sister . I don't care , it's fucking brilliant .
So I'm gonna go now you , you might actually agree with this one , because I think like I'm not into as much of the musical scene as you are , but I'm gonna go . One we've seen together live , because we saw such a great version , was the pogues . Yep , and I'm gonna go .
I'm assuming it's uh , now I'm not gonna go christmas , actually , because that's too obvious . Yeah , yeah , I'm gonna go rainy night in soho by the pogues . Yeah , you've seen him do a great , but if it could match the version we saw , I'd absolutely want that .
By the way , sorry I forgot to mention this we need a novelty song , and I think I'd probably go for Every Loser Wins by Nick Berry , which I think is a generally good song . Is that a novelty song ? It is , isn't it ? It comes from EastEnders , every loser wins . I don't think he would say it's a novelty song .
We did it on EastEnders and the releases were that popular , yeah .
I don't know if I want that on my line-up , if we're playing , if I have to go on a holiday . I get what you mean , though it ties into another question question . But actors doing pop songs , erm , I mean you . You might not have heard it , you will hear it at some point . Mike Flowers , wonderwall .
I might have yeah , you did a version of that better , better than Mike Flowers some people say no one's heard it yet just me . I say , that probably is .
I said maybe . I said maybe . No one's heard it yet , just me . I say that it probably is . I said maybe . I said maybe You're going to be the one that saves me .
That saves me . And after all , and after all , you're my wonderwall .
You're my wonderwall . You're my wonderwall . I said , maybe You're gonna be the one that saves me , that saves me . You're gonna be the one that saves me , that saves me . You're gonna be the one that saves me , that saves me . You've got to be the one that saves me , that saves me , yeah .
Because I think that is oh , no , no , I'm going to change . Oh , because I see this In other songs . Some people might not , but Spaceman .
Oh yeah , you love that Don't you yeah .
I'm going to go that .
Is it . Babylon Zoo .
Babylon Zoo I think you've got to have a bit of hip hop in there , and I think I'd probably go for Either . It was a good day by ASQ , but you won't get away with that on Top of the Pop , so I know , by De La Soul . I know I love you better so .
Similar vibes , I'll go Eminem's Stan . I would love to have that live on top of pops yeah , yeah so he's going cold again .
It's not karaoke you know what it is , um , and then a couple more .
Well , my other one , like just before , like they announced , like the top 10 , I'd probably go for , I don't know , something like um , I don't know , I mean , I'm really not sure about this like , maybe I right , so I'll jump in while you're thinking out loud , iconic , I probably go spice girls wannabe .
Yeah , yeah , I'm with me , but that's on there um , I'd go .
Uh , tears for fears . Everyone wants to rule the world . Because that's on there . I'd go Tears for Fears , everyone Wants to Rule the World . Because that's a brilliant song yeah , I'm not against that .
I love the intro and actually there's a version on YouTube . It's played on a steel drum , is it them ? No , no it's some guy in his garden doing it and what's your number one ?
my number one would be Go Save the Queen by the Sex Pistols , because it did get to number one , but it got cheated out of being number one because it was the Queen's Jubilee and it should have been number one , so it didn't get to number one . It sold more records , didn't get to number one though . It did Exactly .
This is on Jubilee Week . God save the Queen , the fascist regime . I'll go Because I don't think they ever did this live , but as a number one it seems quite fitting . Let's get Freddie and the boys in there for Bohemian Rhapsody .
Yeah , fair enough , fair enough . Nelson said what do you consider the best acting performance by a pop star in a TV appearance and what do you consider as the best pop star performance by an actor ?
We chatted briefly about this earlier , didn't we ? I know mine now .
Yours is a really good one , actually , yeah my best acting performance by a pop star is Morrissey and Brookside . If no one's seen this type in Morrissey and Brookside , he's at an airport , it's only like a fleeting scene and someone says to him I know who you are , because so do I . I love it . It's so , Morrissey .
Which ties into when we did the Morrissey documentary , where she says oh my God , you've changed my life . I didn't mean to . I didn't mean to . Yeah , I didn't mean
¶ Musical and Historical Musings
to . We've already mentioned it , nick Berry , every Loser Wins . Yeah , go Bob . That's with Shout .
I mean Kylie Minogue coming from oh , you're into pop stars and acting , not the other way .
I'm thinking actor to pop star , so Don't you like Marty McCutcheon Ah yeah , this is my moment .
That could be it actually this is my moment that could be it actually .
This is my perfect moment with you . I'm going to go Kylie Minogue with . I can't remember what the song's called .
Show me how I put you down . I don't know what you say . What you say in my place .
We're a top ten every song . We're a big one . Don't come fighting me . Kylie Minogue .
Oh , no , sorry , Do you know probably the correct answer there , natalie ? Or come find me . No , sorry , do you know Probably the correct answer ?
there Natalie and Brulia Torn Nah shit , I'm all out of faith . This is how I feel Can we explain to people as well , by the way , that we've been four different pubs today and we've in every single pub we've heard Brimful of Asher on the 45 , genuinely this and Nickelback .
Well , we talked on the way driving here we were sort of laughing about the Chad Kruger Nickelback sort of thing . We've heard it everywhere , yeah and yeah , it doesn't really answer this question , does it ? But we've heard it several times .
Have you got a pop star to actor though ?
Pop star to actor . I find harder .
Yeah , it is difficult . I thought , Bowie on extras . I thought that was brilliant .
Yeah , I can't disagree , but he is playing himself . So but he plays himself very well .
Obviously a lot of films Eminem , 8 Mile but it's a film rather than a I've not seen it obviously Well , and your man Bowie in Labyrinth is fantastic . Yeah , yeah .
Yeah , I might have to go with you there , because I can't think of a better example . Right Travelling we mentioned as well , by the way , didn't we Eminem in 8 ?
Mile . I've said that oh yeah , I've said that .
Yeah , well , it's good .
Not listening . Keep your ears open , mate . It's good you might miss some of the good stuff .
Hold on , we've just got one alive question , by the way , oh yeah , From Steve-O . If we could travel back in time to any point , where would it be and why ? And this is like literally on the spot , because it's just come in now from Steve-O .
Probably the creation of the world .
Would you really want to go back that early ?
I'd like to know how it started but then they've been if we're not allowed that because like that , basically like just is there a god and stuff like that . So we're going like quite deep with that . But if we're talking about actual eras , like what we know about , I think I'd probably go probably 60s .
No , that's what he says on a peak show , jess probably back to the 90s yeah , he says jess has a peak show . He's all about his back to 60s and Margo's the 1960s , because they've been like millions . You'd go back to the 90s about 30 years ago .
But you've got to be careful going back too far because , like , let's just see the Renaissance era , but then it's quite dirty . I'd like to see the fall of Caesar's . Yeah , I sometimes think Roman , but then when it came to Britain , obviously like the Roman Empire , obviously like collapsed .
I'd like to see the collapse of that . Obviously I'm like . I'm not involved in this .
I'm watching this rather than like being involved , so you're a viewer , not a participant . I don't want to see the rape and pillage of like people .
But yeah yeah , I mean just an observer medieval England , just just to sort of see the way they lived and like think , say what I'd like to see like I mean , it's not really an era , but I'd like to see you know like some of the biggest mysteries of all time , and just see what happened ah , so like be at the the moment of I don't know like the JFK
assassination .
Yeah , I'm there going , no fucking .
it wasn't Oswald . No , I saw it . It weren't him . He didn't do it . Yeah , it weren't him . Stop having a go at him . Great question , I don't actually know .
It's a really tough one , Matt , If anyone . By the way , if you've got your own , if you're listening to this , let us know .
What about when we sent the convicts to Australia ? And I'm first getting off the boat . God , look at this place . What are we going to do here ? Shit this is shit .
It's fucking doshy . It's sunny isn't it ? Yeah , there's nothing going on . Yeah , it's really hard one now . There's loads of it . I think I'll go for the fall of Rome , the fall of Caesar , I think , if we're going for that , the fall of Caesar .
It's a very specific .
Well , not Caesar , just Rome and Britain .
No , it's a good answer . If I'm just a viewer , I'd like to go and see the old dinosaurs out in action . I don't know if I'm allowed to go back that far , but I would like to sort of see like is .
That's a brilliant one , actually , when whatever happened to the dinosaurs , obviously like the , oh , the moment that it went wrong when it went wrong Like what actually happened .
How clever were they ? Yeah , were they clever , were they talking ?
Were they doing podcasts , podcasts , we don't have .
Yeah , we lost Dinosaur Podcast .
Yeah yeah , Dinosaur Podcast , That'd be brilliant that I wonder if I could talk and do my amazing literature and stuff .
We'd watch T-Rex here , which has zero tops .
Another one is Shakespeare .
I'd like to see Shakespeare as a fucking fraud . Completely different talent . I would love to see the first time , because I know how stunned he was that Carl Pilkington saw Stephen Merchant , because he says absolutely like double take . I'd love to see that first time . I'll tell you what .
I would really like to go back to actually who made Burt Backarach up . Back Outrack , not Burt Backarach .
Well , I can tell you , so you'd be watching me .
So we both think we've made . When someone backs out somewhere if you've not heard , like the last episode , we both think we've made up the nickname burnt back out rack for people who back out of things . Yeah , um , I think I made it up . You think you ?
I'd like to go back yeah , so what you'd watch is me in my garden on the phone to us no way something me phoning you saying , but back out again nope , and you saying I'll use that .
You jotting that down somewhere , I think in a notepad if that happens , I'd just say well , that's what you've just seen fair enough .
Imagine if we went back to that about five years ago like , who made that up ?
we're having that power and that's what you chose right , I really need to get to the bottom of this .
I need to get to the bottom of this . Yeah , travelling said create your ideal Bond film . He says he wants a Bond like he was going to play James Bond a villain , and who sings the theme ? Singing the theme for me is Morrissey . I think he'd be brilliant . I've mentioned him before , obviously , but I think he'd be like this guy .
He doesn't take any nonsense . And he carries a Walter PP7 revolver .
Yeah , he'd be like really like sort of .
Yeah , I think my take on that . So for the song .
Or Scott Walker , by the way , scott Walker would be amazing .
I love the idea of Pet Shop Boys doing he doesn't surrender to anybody , he fights his way out of handcuffs . Yeah , I think Pet Shop Boys would do it good . And then it's a bit neat for most of our listeners , our Chef United listeners . I like the idea of Travelling , playing Bond Jimmy Ramble , maybe being the bad guy yeah .
The villain yeah . That'd be an amazing Bond film , or maybe Nick like the sort of .
I'd say Hal , because Hal probably wouldn't have seen the bad guy .
Yeah , maybe a great villain .
Yeah , and Travelling's a clean-cut , good-looking guy . He could play Bond , and Hal is the Hal . Nick and Jimmy are a consortium against him If people don't know what we're talking about here . It's Chef . United content creators . It's Chef .
United content creators who are at war with each other , which I love , by the way .
I think Major Charles is about . They're not really at war no , they're not really . But I think Major Charles is , but for the sake of a Bond film .
Yeah , he's a Carlisle fan and he I think he shared a few things before about two Carlisle podcasts having a go at each other .
I love it . I love how petty it is , major Charles , actually could be a good Bond , couldn't he ?
we don't really know what he looks like .
Oh yeah , true , very true my Bond would probably be Maidler . Actually , I think he could play Bond . He looks like Bond as I imagine Bond . Oh yeah , great , roger Moore era Bond , wouldn't he ? Yeah , I think they'd be like oh right , are you doing that right ?
yeah , I'll wear the blazer yeah , I'll wear the blazer , but I'll kill the foreign man if I have to yeah , I'll kill the foreign man .
Yeah , if you've got to do it , you've got to do it . My villain would probably be Phil Schofield Like , because obviously he took Mabley's job , so that's who he's after just don't like him , do you ?
I don't like him and , on that same token , edmonds , and actually someone who put a . Edmonds would be an amazing villain why does he always look like an international terrorist ?
he would be an amazing villain . He would be a good villain actually . Yeah , behind his like sort of like I can imagine like behind the screen going kill him and instead of like the odd job or the enforcer , like this yeah , imagine that blobbing .
Blobbing , to be fair , that's a better villain than fucking mouse and bomb villains .
I'm gonna make you mine . It's not impossible got to let you know I'm irresistible , baby , can't you see ? You're the one for me . You belong to another . I don't wanna hurt nobody , but my heart just can't fall back . It's the way you make me feel , spinning my world around . Bye .
Tyrone . I've met Tyrone at Tramlines recently .
You said you didn't take to him , didn't you ? No , I said I didn't . I'm not joking . I said he was a great guy An awful man .
I said he's an awful awful , awful man , now brilliant , really really nice guy , and he said would we ever consider doing a live stream and commenting on a TV show of our choice ?
Give the people what they want . Google box style .
We've thought about this before . We're going to do not live what's it called Eurovision .
Yeah , it's not out of the question . It might be something that comes up . We've said , aren't we ? It's a weird one , because if it's something you don't know , we might just be sat in silence watching it .
It's got to be something that you can comment on , because if it's like just a TV programme we've not seen , it's literally just going to be us going oh imagine us just watching it , saying oh , yeah , so I think , if we're going to do that , in my opinion it's got to be something like an award show , like Smash Hits which A Travelman might be quite good
because they are really entertaining , but I think there's so much to go out of .
Have you seen a lot of Travelman ?
Yeah , I already did . I thought it was called something .
Yeah , maybe we could . Yeah , we're not ruling that out . That might be something we'll look at .
Yeah , we are going to look into that . Yeah , I mean we've talked before .
I mean we hate doing already said , eurovision is one we've said . I don't know if it would just end up with us just being on the karaoke show , wouldn't it ? With us saying this is a
¶ Musical Banter and Festival Antics
bit like .
Imagine .
Morrissey singing this yeah , I think it's shared . Do you believe in life after ?
It wasn't Morrissey , it wasn't Johnny Rotten , wasn't it he wanted to do ? John Lydon wanted to do your vision . Yeah , imagine that .
I could be wrong . I could be right , Probably the most .
Yeah , who's the ? I sound quite thick now , but who's the really controversial man these days ? I didn't think it would work like that . Johnny Rotten is it John Lydon ? Yeah , is that John Lydon ? Yeah , yeah , this song stinks of hypocrisy .
This song is an absolutely joke . What are you saying to me ? Like , yeah , anyway , dead Bart , this is a good one . This is from Dead Bart . Actually , I've got a friend . He gets picked on by his Irish colleague for his dyspraxia .
Well , he put Irish in quotation . Yeah , quotation , which is me . So he's picking on me in this question , fair enough .
He says he picks on a colleague for his dyspraxia and having a strange form of Tourette's where he sings in a Jamaican accent at random intervals . What advice would you give him ?
Who am I advising the hero ?
You're advising the bully which is you in this ? Yeah , the Irish bully .
Yeah , I don't think I'm the bully . I think if he had to put up with what I have to put up with , he wouldn't See you're nodding .
He can't see that you accept that You're nodding firmly there .
Well , you were saying obviously on the way here . This is another dyspraxia thing , by the way . This is true . I've shown it to Liam . I've had to like get the dyspraxia card symptoms out . I say random words really loud . You were getting annoyed from the car up here , weren't you ?
Well , I think I'll , but again , I don't think this is bullying . So I'm driving us here . It was hurting my ears that you were shouting randomly and I kept really calmly saying I don't know why you shouted that word and you went . Ah , sorry , I didn't shout at it yeah . Like it was . It's not me like over-egging the pudding .
It's a very , very complex illness , but I wasn't saying right , pull over .
Why the fuck are you ? I was saying I know you can't really help it . Why are you shouting all the time ? Why are you hurting my ears ? What would I advise ? What would I advise ?
I think I'd advise , stop having to go to the disabled man , which is me , I would say listen to Liv and me .
Lee Liam handles this perfectly because he deals with the dyspraxic man with a calm .
The dyspraxic man . What ?
are you talking about .
The dyspraxic man . That's a proper illness . God , it's ableist the troubled man . I don't like talking about my dyspraxia , but you bring it up every single episode , every time you have to bring it up .
Every time you think you're out , they pull you back in every time .
I think I forgot about the dyspraxia he pulls me back in .
No , I would advise him to say you know , treat him with humility , Wipe the floor . You're not a child , what are you ?
talking about .
No , but I'm not taking a piss now . I'm saying I don't have a go at you when you go to bed and I wipe up the spilt salsa .
We don't live together .
No , we don't . But for a couple of days we are doing but wipe up the salsa that he spilled True . Put the salsa in the fridge when the next day he says oh shit .
I've left the salsa out . That's pissness , though that's not dyspraxia . Bit of both I would say the spilling it .
The spilling it is something . And on that , by the way , we went for breakfast today , yeah , yeah . So I ordered a can of diet coke because I'm trying to do the low carb keto diet . You ordered a tea . Comes in a pot of milk standard without testing or tasting .
You've poured the full pot of milk into your tea , yeah , and I instantly said to you that'll be too milky . Yeah , but you had one soup and say that's too milky yeah , right again .
Once I've started pouring , it's really difficult with dyspraxia to turn back yeah , to turn back , so I had to have a full pint of milk well , it wasn't a pint , it wasn't a pint , but yeah , so obviously like but I think this is me calmly dealing with that , saying you shouldn't , you shouldn't have put that full milk in there .
Yeah , but I can't help that .
No , no no , but I wasn't slagging you off .
I just said .
I know you didn't want to put that full milk in there and you said it's too milky .
Liam looked at the festival because he hates crowds .
If Liam went to a festival .
I know I honestly think we won't be friends by the end of the festival , because I don't know how you're that old .
So Jodie says I'm autistic yeah , Because I .
She's actually a girlfriend by the way , people don't know Jodie , she's not a celebrity .
Yeah , it's not Jodie .
Foster .
So I struggle to not say what I'm thinking . So we're a weird relationship where you're doing strange things and I can't not comment on them . So a lot of people would not say anything . But I said to you you poured all that milk in . You don't want all that milk in there , do you ? You instantly had a taste and said it's too milky .
But then this is me solving it , working with you . I said some sugar in there might make it taste .
Alright , yeah , and it worked Put the sugar in and it's a lot better . Yeah , so you're working like a carer when we go to festivals and obviously you have to , like , set a tent up and stuff . I genuinely just sit on grass . If I can't , I can't . How many times have my shoelaces come on ? Nothing this weekend , genuinely .
I've tied your . So this is again where people might say it's bullying . I might say why have you come with shoelaces ? If you can't tie them , so I'll tie them for you . I'm being a good guy there . But then I will say if it's bullying , I apologise . I'll say why didn't you get Velcro shoes ?
Because you can't have Velcro shoes . You can't have Velcro shoes in your fort .
No , but that's not me having a go , that's me saying why haven't you managed your situation better ?
Because you get you to sign .
So you'll bully me then , if anything , yeah , if anything yeah , rolls reverse . It's the time I choose .
Nick said which unfunny Sheffield United podcast is the one that Andrew and Liam most enjoy listening to . This is a dig at Tufty Club , because they were a response to what Deb had put . I think they are our cousins . I'd like to say Tufty Club like in the yeah , I mean we've . If people don't .
Obviously it's a Sheffield United podcast , tufty Club , but it's kind of not is it . They don't talk about Sheffield , you don't need to be a Sheffield United fan to enjoy Tufty Club . So if you're listening and you're not a Sheffield United fan , honestly check out is .
Bob Monkhouse because he's so protective over his jokes and everything he said . But what I will give Toffee Club credit for is one of the reasons we decided to do and record .
Not necessarily do this because in COVID we were having loads of chats about nonsense , but I loved the bits in Toffee Club where they weren't talking Sheffield United , they were just thinking it was just a conversation of two mates who had not spoke for a week and we kind of thought , yeah , we'll just record us talking , we'll just nick that , we'll nick that we
were fucking fuming everything . Now everything will be going right into his Monkhouse book but yeah , one thing I love about the Tuffy Club podcast is the bits where they don't talk football , and that kind of spurred certainly me on to think we could just do a podcast where it doesn't need to mess it .
We tried to create a theme and that was the main thing , but we also thought we found each other every few days talking shite about . Have you seen that ? Do you remember that ? Do you ever used to watch that ?
Yeah , might as well . Record it . Who remembers is basically all our conversations , isn't it ?
Who remembers us . It's tough to call them stealing .
Steal their entire idea . He also said which film that Andrew has heard of but not seen . But he most likes to watch Godfather for me , because I love Goodfellas . I love Casino . Have you seen Donnie Brasco ? I've seen Donnie Brasco I like . Donnie .
Brasco .
Yeah , I like Danny Brasco yeah .
I like Danny Brasco the .
Departed Not seeing that .
So that's one . If you like those sort of films , send in . Yeah , send in film requests for me Send in recommendations for Andrew to watch films I've seen . Edward Scissorhands .
The more I learn about I know about before , the less I know , the more I want to look around , digging deep for clues . On higher ground , difficult to swim with rivers run Drought fields and feast with my eyes open . That's the kid drinking from the living cup .
There was a break there . You might not have noticed . Andrew needed to go to the toilet , got up and knocked over a drink and again I've wiped it up . I don't know why I'm the bully in this scenario . Accidental .
My hands are like Ian Curtis when he's dancing .
I thought you were going to say when he hung himself no , it's not that bad yet . No , we can't , we're not going for that yet . Yeah , it's fine .
It's not that bad yet no , we can't , can we even we're not going for that yet .
Yeah , it's fine , it's fine . Anyway , we've got no apologies . That's awful where my mind went to then ?
Are you telling me that it's time to end it ?
Move on . Live question . I suppose Again from Steve-O . He's sending us stuff live , so I might as well put it in there . And actually this is a great question If you have to absolutely have to is put , which one would you get rid of forever ? So football music , sitcoms or Richard Madeley ? So it can't be music . I'm going to put that out there early on .
That's too primal , isn't it ? It can't be music .
I'm going to put that out there early on . It can't be music , it can't be football for me .
No , I watched that with my dad . There's a lot of memories tied into that , Do you know ? The sad thing is yeah , I think it's going to be Richard Madeley . It makes our podcast redundant , doesn't ?
it Living with no .
Living with nobody nobody , I think , if we have to get rid of one of those things football music , sitcoms it can't be it has to be .
Richard Bale , I've got more . We were talking earlier , but this could , I suppose .
So the answer then this could be so who else been on TV all the time ? They'll be living with Gary Lineker , can't be that ? No , but there's other people . What I mean is who is like the ?
nearest one , would you say to . Maidley yeah , schofield's one of them . To be fair and I keep bringing them up Edmund's another one . Yeah , edmund's another one , someone who's been on our TV screens the whole way through our lives . I was going to say Anthony Turner , but she can't get on TV for Loving the Money now , can she no ?
Not anymore not even Lynam Michael Burke .
Michael .
Burke's not on TV anymore no , last time . I saw Michael Burke no , no , didn't work . Living with Stephen Mulhern . What are you calling that ? Living with Stephen Mulhern ?
tell you what we're talking about . I thought he was Stephen Mulhern .
Tell you what we're talking about today . What's his name ? Again , who does the Sky Sports thing ? Dan Jones , dave Jones .
David Jones , david Jones .
We were talking about earlier , who presents Friday night football and Monday night football and all the main games on Sunday , and we couldn't think of it .
He's the most bland man on TV yeah , the most frightening thing I've seen him more than like most other people more than some of your family , yeah , but he's apparently . He's done Monday night football since 2016 , so we've watched him hundreds of times and neither of us could name him David Jones .
No and if you said to me now , what does he look like ? I couldn't . It's funny because I can picture him .
But I can't picture him . No , but the picture of him in my head can .
It's Stephen Mulhern , and that's a joke yeah , yeah , Now , genuinely like I don't know what he looks like even now , but I don't know what it looks like even now .
Good question from Steve . Out there it's probably got to be Mayley that would sabotage what we've done .
We'll get a better title for a start . You cry out in your sleep all my feelings exposed . There's a taste in my mouth . The desperation takes hold . Things exposed there's a taste in my mouth . That desperation takes hold . And there's something so good , it's just gonna function , no more .
Love love will tear us apart again . Love love will tear us apart again . Love Love will tear us apart Again .
Love , love will tear us apart Again .
Love , love will tear us apart Again .
Again Brilliant .
I don't know what you're ready for that time .
The Major , the Major , the Major , the Major . We were looking out for your results today . Actually didn't we ? Carlisle , I think ? The lost to Fleetwood on the end .
Yeah , we were cheering when we were 2-2 .
on behalf of the Major I've seen Charlie White scored two goals and I said I bet the Major calls him Charlie Woke . The Major said this is a great question .
He had a bit of a stick recently . I know as well .
Yeah , some people say he's jealous of , is it A-Up Not getting on some ?
American platform . We're very much behind the Major .
Yeah , definitely , team Major . What would your ideal five celebrities be , for a celebrity to come down with me , and what three-course meal do you think Richard Maidley would make ? So this is not us being in the room , this is us watching it ?
Yeah , because I got this wrong initially . I thought this was us with them . This is as a viewer which five do we want ? Maidley's one of the five , I assume . So it's four
¶ Celebrity Dinner Party Planning
others . Yeah do you want to do his meal ?
first . Well , I was thinking it's . I think I'd do oxtail soup as a starter .
Yeah , in a slow cooker . But yeah , Put it in , put it in .
Well , you actually said before Richard Maidler this is a genuine quote from him that he says he's like Hitler in the kitchen .
Yeah , really I can imagine him .
No no no . I don't think he does like the salutes and stuff . I do agree with that . In the workplace , that's a sneak shot .
I'm thinking I'll go with Oxtail soup salad because I think he'd love that . It's a low-cost ingredient . Yeah , put the time and love in .
I think he'd go for his main meal bouffant crud , I'm thinking no , no , I think he's especially pretentious , because I don't think he'd be doing it in this way , but he keeps saying something like yeah , it's lobster yeah , yeah , yeah people think it's flamboyant , but it's lobster .
We eat lobster yeah , I like lobster . Yeah , I will .
And his dessert , I reckon it'd be so I'm thinking here creme brulee , but he torched the top live in front of the game yeah , yeah , yeah get some blood torch . Yeah , individually I'll do it , I'll do it now watch dude now blood torch here , blood torch top , yep , yep , going on .
I would honestly go for a meal at Richard Maidler's house if he were making it . Not because I'm a fan of Richard Maidler , but I think he would make a good three-course meal .
It would be good , I think he'd win Celebrity .
Come Dime with me , because I think everyone would be going . Well , do you know what he wouldn't win ?
it , would he ? These would be polished dishes . Yeah , yeah , no , I've done it several times . And the five of people we've mentioned .
Well , that's a question later on , but I am going to pick someone that we have mentioned . Do you know what I like ? Controversy . I like confrontation , as long as I'm not involved in it . Engineer for confrontation I go for .
Mike Graham and Mike Parry . So I'm going to go Parry , I wasn't going to go Graham . Yeah , parry and Richard Maynard , I think would be a proper clash . Mike , I'll toast it . I'll toast it .
I don't want you to toast it because this is the worst thing , I've ever tasted , no one toasted my pudding because I was stuck about Bell but I'm Grabe because obviously they've fallen out .
I presume they've not spoken since I'd like Paris to have fucked together .
Why did you ?
end it . Probably pissed as well , by the way , because , like , obviously , you drink that , and he would ask that question , wouldn't he ?
Yeah , so why didn't we do it anymore , guys ? And he would go no , just fuck off , leave it . Yeah , and then I'd have Schofield and Eamon Holmes Elms for me , because they obviously Eamon Elms , if people don't know when Schofield got there , you won TalkSport engineering competition , don't you , yeah , when , when I've played the game .
I've played the game . When Schofield got sacked for doing whatever he did , eamon Elms went on GB News and just laid into him . I don't do the accent , he's not even that talented . He says he's not even that talented , but he keeps getting shows . He keeps getting it . Everyone knows he's not a successful man . Everybody knows he's not good at what he does .
I'd love to see him say that to Schofield .
I think you want arguments . I'm thinking what being a nice dinner first ?
Yeah , but you're not there .
No , but what don't ? So one of the reasons I don't watch Come Down With Me or Falling Into Bed is because I hate the confrontation . It makes me cringe when they're all falling out , although I listen to a lot of Talks Ball which contradicts that . So I'm thinking what would be nice for Rich ?
I like Parry just purely because the drunk guy in the corner but I'm thinking what would Rich have a good time with ? I think someone like a .
You don't want it to be boring though you don't want everyone to get on .
No , no , no . I want some debate , but I want someone like a Mike Tyson or someone that it wouldn't Rich would have to . He wouldn't be able to change the way he is .
But I don't know what about Mike Tyson Morris ? Eh ?
Oh yeah , hulk Hogan , again I think you're going to have to confrontate . Oh no , you're thinking how can we police this crowd ?
Yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah . Would Hogan , though , have a go at Tyson ? I don't like the way he's tied , brother . I don't think he'd say that if he's a bit of a , I say he's a coward . He's fucking like seven foot fucking biggest Muslim man in the world , right Brett Hart on Elgin .
I like the idea , and Brian May that's who you think , corny Elves , haven't you ? I like Brian May , yeah .
I think he'd be really like it's too salty .
I just don't think he'd eat it . I just thought it was a little bit too salty . To be honest , I don't know .
I don't even know .
I think Warnock could be a good one , but I think Warnock with other people would be genuinely alright . I think he'd be like it's alright . I tell you , rich , you have done a great meal . He put his arm round , done a great meal . He put his arm around me . A fantastic meal .
Richard , you won at best . You won at best . Yeah , I'll go on , but then I imagine I'll text him where you're at and he'll go . Why ?
Absolutely awful that .
How he can give that to people he's got to think about it . How he ?
can touch that he could have killed us . I like Warnock . I think I probably need another . I want like a . I want Rich to get home with someone like a , judah , judah yeah , rolling her eyes all the time , let's cut that again . Yeah , I don't know if we've got enough , but yeah , it's a great question from a great man .
Craig said you stuck . It's a similar sort of question . You're stuck on a desert island with Liam . This is like he sent this to me . You have to survive for one month . Only food and water are available and he's put EG live fish and rainwater for drinking . It's a tropical island . It's dangerous .
It's from the following list of people who would you like to be on the island with ? And he's given us Mike Parra , richard Maidley , paul Sykes , neil Warnock , hulk Hogan and Les Dennis .
So you showed me this list a while ago . We're choosing three of the six . We've got to decide between , as you said , is it three ?
of the six . Yeah , so I think you have to go for Maidley .
Yeah , a calm head , it yeah . So I think you have to go for mailer . Yeah , a calm head . No , it's fine , I'll be the accommodation .
I'll swim over there . I'll just go to a little island over there and I'll get some coconuts Sharks in the Bay .
I'll go and catch one of the sharks in the bay . Yeah , so yeah , sensible . Well , I proved it didn't .
I , I'm a celebrity . I'd that he parted the Hudson River . I mean , if that's true , he can't not have it , can he ? He'd go around , all go-go , he'd part with his pythons .
But I'm thinking , I'm coming at it from a slightly different way . I'm thinking rule out the disruptive influence you can't have . Paul Sykes , Paul . Sykes would He'd kill you . He'd beat us both up in the first minute .
Yeah , paul Sykes would He'd kill you . He'd beat us both up in the first minute . Yeah , I'll kill you . He's not Scottish .
I'll kill you , I'll kill you , I'll kill you . Paul Sykes and Hulk Hogan .
Paul Sykes would be unbelievable . He is .
I think don't get me wrong he'd have his value when he says pigs on the island , I'll go and catches a pig and kill a pig , I reckon do you know what might be good , though , getting Paul Sykes in to get all the food in and then killing him because you couldn't , you couldn't , I don't know if both of us combined yeah , but with Maidley , yeah , probably not
would we have Hulk to just help us get rid of Sykes ? I don't know that , brother , but Hulk Hogan's a notorious like traitor .
I'm saying this . I don't know if he is In this like thing . I'm going mad . I'm slugging his character off . He might have a go at us he might side with Sykes , he might side with .
Sykes and kill us
¶ Island Survival Strategy Discussion
. Yeah , so the only thing my thinking is Madeley Parry and Les Dennis . Oh , no wait . So Madeley , riley Warnock and Les Dennis are probably the sanest people to be on an island with yeah them six . And we might be able to kind of find a way of fucking them .
Les Dennis might just go up and the laughter stops . What's left ? What's left ? I'm really not doing it . Let's get some fish and the laughter stops . And the laughter stops . What's left but a ?
clown , but at least I think . I think I could survive on that island . I think if you put Hogan or Paul Sykes on there , I'm not sure I'm I'm lasting that long , because they'll kill us in our sleep .
I don't know how Hogan would , but I think Sykes definitely would . Yeah , so so we have to agree .
So we have to agree , don't we ? So I'm saying so I'll take Les Dennis . I don't think he'd contribute much , but he'd be , we'll have to stop .
You've got to read the press , though , with Les Dennis , haven't you I ?
think like we'd have to every couple of hours . Imagine him just staring at everyone .
The drugs don't work .
We'd have to give him a whole gunway every now and then yeah , you're right . Warnock . I think he'd motivate us Like lads . He wouldn't be necessarily doing a great deal , he'd create a collecting firewood . I'll tell you what , liam the way you got up that tree I saw you chopping that tree the way you got them bananas Warnock would motivate us .
We've got to go Warnock . Yeah , warnock . Fair news , dennis , just because he's not going to intrude on what we're doing . And Hogan , I think . So you'll hope I'll go Hogan , he's a big man if we need him . Yeah , we'll go Hogan .
It's just talking bullshit , but I imagine Warnock going . That's bollocks though , isn't it Hulk ?
That's absolute bollocks .
Well , liam , I think you've built that shelter . And Les Dennis going and the laughter starts in the fucking corner .
Hit it Na-na-na-na- .
Lyrical gangster . I scored him as the officer .
No , we don't want to die . Yes , we multiply Ch-ch-ch-change . Murderer . I scored him as the officer We've got to stop that there , can we ?
If anyone wants to get in touch with us , send us anything . Find us on Twitter at livingwithmade1 , or you can send us an email at livingwithmadely at outlookcom .