128 - How To Avoid Burnout

Did You Know  0:02  
Did you know that according to a Harvard Business Review Report, entrepreneurs are more at risk of burnout because they tend to be extremely passionate about work and more socially isolated, have limited safety nets and operate in high uncertainty?

Intro  0:16  
Hello, action taker! Welcome to Live Blissed Out. A podcast where I have inspirational and informational conversations with business owners and subject matter experts to help you get the scoop on a variety of topics. Tired of hesitating or making decisions without having the big picture? Wanna be in the know? Then this is the place to go. I'm your host Marisa Huston. Helping you achieve bliss through awareness and action. So let's get to it. In this episode, Alejandra Slatapolsky shares tips on how to avoid burnout (at least most of the time) when juggling a home, kids, partners and a business (or two). Alejandra is an entrepreneur, marketing communications expert and a mom of two. She has helped dozens of small and mid sized companies grow, pivot and expand and has launched two companies in the last eight years. She has helped financial services executives, business owners and C-Suite leaders with creating their marketing plans and growth strategies for almost 20 years. She is also the host of the show The Biz Of Wealth. To learn more, visit www.scalto.com.

Disclaimer  1:22  
The information opinions and recommendations presented in this podcast are for general information only and any reliance on the information provided in this podcast is done at your own risk. This podcast should not be considered professional advice. 

Marisa Huston  1:34  
Alejandra, welcome to the show. 

Alejandra Slatapolsky  1:36  
Thank you for having me.

Marisa Huston  1:37  
It's great that you're here and I am looking forward to having this conversation. Tell us what we're going to be talking about today.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  1:45  
We're going to be talking about avoiding burnout, or trying to, while we manage our lives and the very different aspects of it. 

Marisa Huston  1:52  
Yeah, and I think a lot of our listeners are gonna relate to this. We feel like we're being pulled in 10 million directions. And there's a lot of people that are juggling many things in their lives, whether it's their kids, running their homes, their partners, their businesses, all the things that they need to think about on a daily basis. And then you and I were just talking about Zoom, and how that can also take a toll on you because you feel like you're just going from one to the next. And before you know it, the day is gone. I can't wait to learn about how we manage this better.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  2:19  
You were talking about Zoom and I was thinking, you know, nowadays, the days in which I have to go somewhere and drive, it's every day actually because I do have to pick up my kids, but the drive has become my break. And that's sort of sad, you know? Because, we jam up on calendars with one Zoom after to the other to the other. Like a couple of weeks ago, I was looking at my calendar and saying, Okay, this is not working, I need to put in some breaks here, because jumping from one Zoonm to the other is just gonna exhaust me every single day. So I always talk to coaches, and some people close to me to help me, you know, figure it out. And I just think that the very, very first rule of managing and trying to avoid burnout is accepting that it's always going to be a balance that is not constantly achieved. I had this coach many years ago, she said, you know, the reality of a working mom, for example, it's always going to be one or the other, unfortunately. People tell you, you're gonna get it all, you know, you can do it all and I'm sorry, that's not true. When you're paying attention to your job, your kids are gonna feel that behind. And when you are paying attention to your kids, something's going to be left behind in your work. So for me, the first part was actually accepting that and saying, it cannot be constant, it cannot be always my job, or my work or my company or always my kids and forget about the company. There's going to be, you know, weeks or months in which I'm going to be more intensely focused on the business and then weeks or months in which kids are gonna pop up and say, hey, you know, I need attention, or I will feel like I'm, I need some of their energy in my life. So that's the first thing that I think most people need to understand. Mostly, I think what you want because it's, you know, working out the guilt and the insatisfaction of not advancing your career, and all of that in between. It's key to avoid just being exhausted at the end of the day, right? 

Marisa Huston  4:12  
Yeah, Alejandra. We tend to want to do everything, like you said. And I think that it's important to your point to compartmentalize to say, okay, maybe I'll have one special day where I can do this with my kids but then the next day, I got to make up for lost time and I got to do this other thing. But trying to manage it all at once is just setting yourself up to fail, right? 

Alejandra Slatapolsky  4:32  
Yes. And also just yesterday, I was at an activity with my daughter and there was these affirmations that this teacher was talking about, you know your daily affirmations, and there were many of them about loving yourself, being kind to yourself, etc. And you had to choose one. And my daughter chose one that said, I can say no. I was like, wow, why did you choose that (and she's 12)? And she's like, because I'm trying too much to make everybody happy. Oh my god. I'm like, well, you're like 30 years ahead of me girl!

Marisa Huston  5:01  
I was just thinking that if only that I thought that way when I was 12. We have to teach ourselves to say no, because we feel guilty, like we're doing something wrong or hurting somebody's feelings when we do that. And the reality is, if you say no, you're actually saying yes to something that matters more.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  5:18  
Exactly. I actually have a Jewish mother, she actually sent me an email one day that said, basically, nobody's too busy, it's just a matter of priorities. She was angry at me that I hadn't called her in awhile. It is actually true. You know, you have to realize and see what fills you up with energy. We go back to our topic of avoiding burnout. The reality also is that there are going to be relationships that fill you up at relationships that drain you. And some of them, you still have to have them, right? I was reading somewhere on one of these days, who was talking about that. If a relationship is draining, you can step aside and if you cannot completely step aside, just manage it in a way that is not gonna completely drain you. And this guy actually gave the example of a mom. He said, like every time you speak to your mom, you're exhausted, just try to get it down to twice or three times a week, right? So that doesn't happen to me, Mom, if you're listening. But the reality is that you have to really pay attention to the relationships and how you manage that, and how much time you dedicate to each of them, right?

Marisa Huston  6:17  
You're absolutely right. And I always say, you know, try to spend as much time as possible with people that inspire you, that lift you up, that helped make you a better person. It's not always possible. There's things you have to do, there's obligations, and there's people that do take up a lot of energy and don't do that for you. So in those situations, being aware of it, and managing it to the best of your ability is very helpful.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  6:37  
Exactly. Right now I'm managing two businesses, a podcast two kids, husband, house, after school activities. So it's a ton. Doctor's appointments. And I was talking to my coach about that, and how I felt like my calendar was actually collapsing. And I'm a big fan of technology, I use it for everything. So I found a tool to do it. And I have my online calendar, and like, you know, the you can book or Calendly, or whatever. The trick I was using, and I was teaching another client the other day, too, is to do separate calendars for the separate objectives, and situations or types of engagements, so that you can really decide what your availability and your focus will be for that. It's a simple trick that helps you out to make your availability for certain types of activities. So let's say that your day is divided into sales, managing a team, taking care of your kids, and I don't know, podcasting, like we do. So go create four calendars, and decide what your availability is going to be for those activities. So for sales, you're gonna dedicate your Monday, Wednesday and Fridays from nine to 11. And then you open only those slots. And that's a very, like, quick trick that I learned, so that I didn't have to worry about assigning the time or meeting the objectives that I had in you know how much time I wanted to dedicate to that task, because I actually just delegated it to the online calendar.

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Marisa Huston  8:33  
That's a great idea. So you're saying Alejandra like you block a specific amount of time that you want to dedicate to a task.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  8:40  
Exactly. And I tried to group the tasks. Generally, you know, we have big groups, you can't do just a single task. But big groups of tasks and then you decide. Most business owners, I recommend you had to dedicate a chunk of your time to managing your business and another chunk to managing, you know, to piece it out. And that's what happens generally, when intrapreneurs at least those two decide, okay, these days are going to be dedicated to teams and these days are going to be dedicated to sales, and basically it's working on your calendar from a strategic point of view, an intentional point of view. Just not opening your calendar to whatever they want with it.

Marisa Huston  8:43  
We just tend to be robotic, and we're not really planning. We're not really being proactive about where we want to spend our time and how we're spending it.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  9:19  
Exactly. And then I'm a huge fan of lists. I do list for everything. I actually use Asana. I've been using it actually I think for almost seven years now. I actually have my husband and Asana. Assign him what he has to do? He doesn't like it that much. 

Marisa Huston  9:35  
What does he not like about it?

Alejandra Slatapolsky  9:36  
He actually works with calendars, but I never got used to it. But it's a good one too. He will put the tasks into his calendar for the next day. So Okay, at this time, I'm going to take care of 123. That works for some people. For me, I prefer a single list of to do list that I work on every day. With Asana, what I do is I just move the deadlines and say, Okay, I'm going to be able to work on the day or that day or the other day. And it's very collaborative too, of course. I manage the teams there, so that helps.

Marisa Huston  10:04  
Yeah, if you have to deal with more than one person that really is a game changer. And for our listeners, I think that point is really important is that, everybody has a different preference. I know people, for example, that are very tactile, and they like to have a journal next to them with a little book and have a pen and paper and they write things down, because that's how they can operate better. They just like that feeling. And I'm more like you. I like the online digital space. I like to use tools that are easy to access anywhere and share. Just being respectful, especially if you're working with people that are part of that process. Understanding what works for them and finding that. Let's be honest, the best tool is the one you use,

Alejandra Slatapolsky  10:40  
Exactly. I do a ton of CRM implementations with clients, because that's an important part of marketing and sales and my approach is always that. For example, I have large organizations that come and say I want to implement Salesforce. I'm like, you know, people just don't use it. It's too complicated. You have to be where the people are. So the best tools that I've seen are the ones that, for example, integrate with your email. Because whenever you're integrating your follow up with your CRM, it just makes sense. So I completely agree. And also it depends on the use, you give it. Going back actually to the avoiding burnout topic, one of the key practices that has helped me in the last few years has been journaling, which is basically just finding good things in your day to write about at the end of the day. And that one, I could not digitalize. I do it on my notebook. That's why I was thinking like, what do I do on notebooks? It works. Logically it has been proven to work to change the way you think. So it is an amazing practice.

Marisa Huston  11:39  
Yeah. And I call that meditation in a sense, because it's really reflecting on what's working, what's not working, what are some things you can improve upon? It's taking the time to evaluate your day, so that you can continue to improve and modify things as needed.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  11:55  
Yeah, a few days ago, I was having nightmares. And I was like, what's happening? I hadn't had one in a while. So I started looking back and say, Okay, it's been a while I don't go to bed with my journal, and really liked it. It really impacts the way you rest too. You're able to focus on positive, on taking a deep breath and looking at your day and saying, Oh, wow, look at all the wonderful things I have in my life. It just sets you up to a good night rest, which is key. 

Marisa Huston  12:23  
That's so true. Is there any other tip we missed?

Alejandra Slatapolsky  12:26  
Don't work on weekends. It's a simple one but most people don't, one way or the other.

Marisa Huston  12:31  
It depends on the type of job you have. But here's the thing. It's going back to what you just said previously. You got to compartmentalize your time, and set expectations with your clients so that they understand. So for example, if you don't answer the phone, after five o'clock, maybe you set that expectation with your clients and let them know that you will always follow up the following day, or let them know when you're available. Set the stage so that there's no confusion and so that you can be your best as well and not get frustrated when people are making demands of you.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  12:59  
Honestly, what really made a huge difference for me in the last few years too, it may seem weird, but when you work in the corporate world, or in a business, whatever you working, sometimes you need to take on a role. So you assume what that role looks like. It's almost like acting, like playing a role, right? So you go into work, and you're playing that role. And I did that for many years in my life in corporate America, right? And it's completely exhausting, I realized that I was trying to play a part, which I did. It was good. But I didn't realize how much energy it took to not just be completely myself. And I feel you know, actually, as part of a core values are pure authenticity, being your whole self. And it's not just because it's quirky, or the nice thing to say. It's just that I really feel like whenever you're just yourself at work and you can be open about who you are as a whole, you will put that much more energy into it because it's gonna just flow. So for example, in Corporate America, you're a mother, oh I'm sure you're working less or you know, whatever it is that the perception is going to be with a mother. So I would almost hide the fact that I was a mother. Once I started showing up and saying hey, no, you know what, you know what? Fine, I'm not answering because I'm actually picking up my kids and you know, at 7am cooking dinner, and I'm actually answering that to clients. I'm saying hey, you no, I'm in the middle of, you know, cooking. I used to hide it. I used to say sorry, I'm busy. But now it's like no, you know, like I have a life and I'm a whole person. And I did that. Not only it benefited me because I was not playing a part but I was showing up wholly. But also it benefited my relationship with the people that I work with. Which was perfect.

Marisa Huston  14:37  
Yeah, I think they appreciate knowing that you value your family or the things that matter to you and that you're trying to balance yourself as opposed to pretending just to impress them.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  14:46  
Exactly. That is the same with hobbies and with relationships and with whatever it is that you do that is not work. Bring your whole self, actually fits into your work. I have lost count of the times that I use things that have happened outside of work to feed into creative processes inside of work. We cannot negate that we are one. 

Marisa Huston  15:05  
Yeah, there is no separation. I actually talk to people about that a lot, because there's always this concept of work life balance. But there really isn't a difference between work and life. It's part of who we are. So not being afraid to bring that up and make that part of who you are, when you're talking to other people. I think people appreciate that. And it's different, because that's not how it used to be.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  15:25  
No, the pandemic did help. I started my business 8 years ago, and I was always virtual. But then people would be like, Oh, really, like you don't have an office? Intentionally. I never opened an office, because I feel like people are unproductive in offices, most of the time. I live through it. You know, I remember going and sitting down at 9am, still half asleep when I was in my 20s, wasting at least two, three hours there. And then the day would pass and I would accomplish like half of what I accomplished with whatever I want to do at home or in a neutral office and with my own hours. So I guess what I'm saying is also that have in mind, a key aspect of avoiding burnout is getting to know yourself and your productivity cycles and your energy cycles, is very important. 

Marisa Huston  16:07  
Yeah, that awareness and planning and setting realistic expectations. And you shared really amazing tips here on how we can actually apply that into our lives. I think that's key. 

Alejandra Slatapolsky  16:17  
Yeah, that's the idea. 

Marisa Huston  16:18  
I appreciate you sharing all this with us. Can you let our listeners know exactly what you do and how you can help them and how they can learn more about what you offer?

Alejandra Slatapolsky  16:26  
Well at Scalto we help companies scale, actually, from a branding and communications perspective, we have a blueprint that we have developed that helps define a business strategy, or marketing communications strategy and a customer journey that empowers companies to grow. So we've been helping companies enter new markets, expanding to new products, and also design good winning marketing strategies. Our website is www.scalto.com or you can find me on Alejandra Slatapolsky. I'm the only one in the world. So you'll find me there instantly online.

Marisa Huston  16:57  
A very unique name, right?

Alejandra Slatapolsky  16:58  
Yes, but my Twitter is at @Aleslata. You can find me there too.

Marisa Huston  17:03  
Thank you Alejandra. I really appreciate you being here.

Alejandra Slatapolsky  17:06  
I appreciate you having me was a ton of fun. Thank you, Marisa.

Did You Know  17:09  
That's a wrap for this episode of Live Blissed Out. Thanks to Alejandra Slatapolsky for joining us, and thanks for listening. If you have a question or comment for a future episode, all you have to do is go to www.speakpipe.com/lbovm or click the link in the show notes to leave a brief audio message. If you find value in our show, please visit www.liveblissedout.com to reach out, subscribe and share on social media. This show is made possible through listeners like you. Thank you. So long for now and remember to keep moving forward!

Transcribed by https://otter.ai