124 - Dealing With Transition & Change

Did You Know  0:02  
Did you know that people may interpret transition in radically different ways? Some people view change with optimism while others are filled with fear and despair. 

Intro  0:12  
Hello, action taker. Welcome to Live Blissed Out. A podcast where I have inspirational and informational conversations with business owners and subject matter experts to help you get the scoop on a variety of topics. Tired of hesitating or making decisions without having the big picture? Wanna be in the know? Then this is the place to go. I'm your host Marisa Huston. Helping you achieve bliss through awareness and action. So let's get to it. In this episode, Taylor Short dives into how to deal with constant transition and change in your job and in your life. We all know that change is always happening. But how can you start to feel more empowered during times of uncertainty and how do we transition yet again, back to normal or a new? Taylor is CEO of Harmonious Return. She is a job reset coach and consultant as well as author of Reset Your Relationship To Your Job. She helps her clients move from feeling exhausted and overwhelmed to energized and fulfilled without leaving their job. Having spent 15 plus years climbing the corporate ladder herself, Taylor discovered a missing piece in corporate America. The entire focus was on external success. But most employees were experiencing a significant internal struggle. Through her own work, she learned what it takes to balance these two and eventually left to start her own business to help people reset the way they relate to their jobs. She knows when people are fulfilled internally, they tap into a goldmine of energy, passion and worth, that positively impacts everything they do. To learn more, visit www.harmoniousreturn.com. 

Disclaimer  1:45  
The information opinions and recommendations presented in this podcast are for general information only and any reliance on the information provided in this podcast is done at your own risk. This podcast should not be considered professional advice. 

Marisa Huston  1:56  
Taylor, thank you for being on the show.

Taylor Short  1:59  
Thank you so much for having me. I can't wait for this conversation.

Marisa Huston  2:02  
Me too. And I would love it if you could set the stage for us and share with our listeners, what we're covering today and why it matters.

Taylor Short  2:11  
Yes. So I am so excited to have this conversation with you around this idea of transition, and work and in life. And it is so prevalent right now. And, I think all of our lives, it has been for the last, what two and a half years? I'm excited to dive into how to deal with transition in your work and in your life. 

Marisa Huston  2:36  
And I think it's such an important conversation to have. Given the circumstances of everything that's happening in the world, it seems to be a little more prevalent than it's ever been. I look at transition personally as, you can either accept it as a loss or as an opportunity for renewal. If you look at it and say, for example, in the situation we're in right now, are we ever going to get back to normal? Whatever normal is. Then, if the answer is no, it can be unnerving for people. They're like, What do you mean? I liked it the way it was before and now here I am and I'm not happy with the situation. So, everybody has a different perception. I'd like to hear your take on how should we define it and how should we deal with it?

Taylor Short  3:23  
Yeah, and every single day, in every single day of our lives, we are dealing with transition. But there's such a different scale of transition that we can be dealing with. And right now dealing with this on a global level kind of something that we're collectively all going through. I think is so unique to transition. And we're feeling that like, absolutely energetically. I've noticed some things in my clients where it almost diminishes our need, and our reasoning to feel stressed or challenged during this time. Because you know that your neighbor is going through it as well and your colleagues are going through it and your boss and people across the world may have. And you know, we're all dealing with this collective massive transition at once. And so I'm seeing that that can add an interesting twist to this of not feeling like you have valid stress with this transition, I guess, if you will.

Marisa Huston  4:23  
That's really a great way to put it. When we look at the fact that we're not alone. And I don't know if you find this happening to you, Taylor, but I start to play a game. Let's say I go to the grocery store. And nowadays, we just don't have as many choices as we're used to. Two years ago, everything was stocked up. We had so many choices. Let's say you went to the ketchup aisle, you probably have hundreds of ketchup choices that you can purchase. And now it seems like that's really been consolidated. You're kind of thinking, Oh, this is terrible because I don't have as many choices and I really liked XYZ or maybe a particular product that I really love is no longer vailable. But isn't it better not to have to make so many choices? And perhaps it also encourages me to try something different and then discover that this new thing that I tried was actually better than the one I really liked before. It's changing your mindset a little bit.

Taylor Short  5:16  
Yeah, you're absolutely right. And the word that keeps glaring at me, as you're saying these amazing things that we're all feeling so much in these day to day things that feel like a transition is adapting. I use a lot of nature in the work that I do. And so I think about how species have had to adapt. Like, here's the situation. So how are you going to change? And I think mindset is so huge, in that. We can choose to see it as fighting the old. We want it to go back to normal, or we can shift and let go of that fight and that argument within our own minds to say, Okay, what's here, now? This is so much more streamlined. I'm not going to spend four hours looking at the ketchup bottles, or whatever it is. And this is how it is now. I feel a lot of things energetically. And it's kind of like you're holding on so tight to the before and then you're transitioning into this new, and we can hold on so tightly with our minds. But if we kind of relax and let it be and open up to okay, maybe this is not so bad. Maybe there is a silver lining in this. Where is that? And begin to get curious about it. I think that's where the magic is.

Marisa Huston  6:25  
I agree. And here's why I love the word transition. Because transition to me, it's moving in a different direction, there is some sort of learning curve. You don't just snap your fingers and say I'm going from A to Z, and it's all going to be perfect. You have to figure things out. The reason that's important is that, given the fact that we are learning from what's happening today, we might discover through that learning that we can come up with better solutions than we ever did before. So for example, right now we're so used to standing in long lines. There's a lot of factors that are causing that to happen. But, I'm also curious and interested in what type of technology is going to come down due to this experience. Because businesses start to realize, Oh, my goodness, this is unacceptable. We've got to figure something out. This old way of doing things doesn't work. So what are some new things we can incorporate now, that will make it better. And maybe a year from now we're going to find that our experience shopping is going to be a lot more streamlined and efficient than we could have ever imagined. And it's a direct result of this transition from the old to the new.

Taylor Short  7:36  
It is I was just thinking is a transition from the old to the new, whatever new looks like I think that's the fear of the unknown is a little bit what is unsettling for us. What you're talking about, on a bigger scale in the work that I do with people in jobs is this great reset, or the great resignation that we've heard. And really, that transition period is so necessary. That key word that you pulled out the learning of what needs to be shifted from the old in order to serve us in this new adapted way of the new. So for example, in this great resignation, we're seeing that the old way of working does not work for the majority. When you have 90% of our population looking at transitioning into a new career, you have to start to wonder why is this transition happening? And really, there's so many different reasons. One of the reasons that I'll pull out is people want flexibility. They were able to see I can work from home part time, or some of the time, all the time, remotely. And some people are realizing that that really elevated their work and their lives. And so now we're figuring out, okay, what's this new way going to be? And you're exactly right, it has to go back to the learning of okay, how is this going to work best for companies? How is this going to work best for the employees and the whole? But it does kind of feel sticky in the middle. Right? While we're figuring that out.

Marisa Huston  8:58  
It's never perfect. As you're figuring things out, you realize that there are going to be benefits to working at the office versus working at home. That goes both ways. But there are so many positives, and we have so much technology now that enables us to benefit from those positives. Think about how much an individual saves on just travel time and fuel. That money goes back in their pockets, and they're not having to dedicate an hour, two hours, whatever it may be just being in the car. Now, obviously in the past, we could still do things in the car, but there's no need for it in a lot of situations. That being said, we also acknowledge that there are jobs that are not flexible that way. There's so many things you can do when you let your imagination take over and think about the possibilities. And I think what happens is we tend to shy away from that because we like being in that comfortable space that we're familiar with.

Taylor Short  9:54  
Yeah. The comfort in the familiar, I think is the main sticking point of why transition can seem and appear scary for all of us really, as human beings. We have very ancestral brains. I always talk about this. And we're not wired for growth. Growth and change feels very scary to us because, as hunter gatherers, we needed that comfort in order to survive, and we needed to know what berries to eat and what not to eat in order to survive. So when we're seeing these things in our age of technology, and things that are shifting so quickly, it can feel very ungrounded.

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Marisa Huston  11:08  
It's very important to acknowledge that because it's where we revert back to. We fall back on what's comfortable. Whenever we're dealing with change and transition it's not comfortable simply because we don't know what the outcome is. We don't even know what the process is. We got to figure it out every step of the way. And that requires a lot more energy, work and uncertainty.

Taylor Short  11:32  
Yes, those of us who are listening and the listeners who are tuning in here to remember. Because our brains are so tricky, and they like to play games with us sometimes and will continue to think I don't know how to handle transition, this feels like unknown and scary to me. But simply remembering that you have successfully maybe it felt a little clunky, you have gotten through this last two and a half years of transition. And so tapping into that remembering of oh, okay, I can do this, I have been doing this successfully, right? I'm still here, I figured out ways to adapt that work for me is so important. Because our brains can continue to trick us and remind us that we don't know how to handle it, when in all actuality, you've got two and a half years of experience with this already. 

Marisa Huston  12:19  
I love where you're going with this Taylor. I think it's so important to reflect. Even ask yourself the question, and I don't care how often you want to do it. There's no rules. It's whatever you're comfortable with. But let's say every quarter, you take a step back and ask yourself, What have I done differently and how has that worked out for me? It's incredible how we as humans evolve. And we turn into, I like to think, better versions of ourselves, as long as we put in the effort to do that. Because you can go the other way. When we grow as individuals, when we learn something new and we make these shifts in our lives, we'll find that we look back at ourselves and we realize that we've really improved and grown. And I think it's important to remember that because in order to do that, you have to get uncomfortable.

Taylor Short  13:07  
Absolutely. When you are saying you know, we can go the other way sometimes. I believe that those are the people who do get sucked into the comfortable, right? Maybe a few times, you'll see people who have challenged themselves to get out of their comfort zone and it not work out. But I think for the majority of the time, you'll often hear from people that the greatest thing that has happened to them in their lives is also their greatest risk. And really stepping out to be true to yourself. So I totally agree with that. Is doing that reflection is so important to remember all the work that you've already done to become who you are today.

Marisa Huston  13:42  
Yeah, because if you're not growing, you're stagnant. That's the bottom line. You're just sitting there. And you wonder, what is the point? Because I think we're built to want to achieve, to want to do things. And it could be in anything, you know? It doesn't have to be in business. When you think about it. When you make a decision to get married, or have a baby, or take a trip, or make these major decisions in your life, that all requires some sort of transition, because you likely have not experienced whatever it is you're going to set out to do.

Taylor Short  14:12  
Yeah, you're exactly right. And then I'm going to take it even deeper in something that I've been leaning into a little bit more, is that the growth actually comes in the transitions, and how you handle those. It's not about when you fall back. We do. How do you bounce back from that? We're human, we are always going to make mistakes. That's how we learn how we grow. And so it's more about in those transitions, how do you pick yourself back up as you continue to move into the new?

Marisa Huston  14:41  
Yeah, it could even be something super fun. Like, let's say you took a trip, and it didn't turn out exactly the way you anticipated. Maybe the room got scheduled at the wrong date, and you got to the hotel and now they're telling you you don't have a reservation. Or your flight got canceled. But you don't remember those moments. as much. Most people won't say, well, because there were a few hiccups along the way, I'm never going to travel again. Because that's just part of the journey.

Taylor Short  15:07  
Yeah, it's interesting to with travel because I think we all kind of expect to have hiccups and things that don't go as planned. So maybe we have that planned flexibility, right? Sometimes it's like when things take the rug from under our feet, it's more of like, okay, now what? Now I wasn't planning for this. So now what do I do? 

Marisa Huston  15:27  
Exactly. And to your point, because it's travel, and it's personal, we tend to realize that, you know, it's gonna be a little bit bumpy, every once in a while, it's just how things work out. And I'm willing to deal with it, because I want what it can offer me. Whatever that is. It's an adventure, I get to meet new people, I get to see other countries and cultures, I get to try different foods. You know, whatever that end goal is. But for some reason, I find that people don't look at business and their general life from that perspective. It's almost like they separate the two.

Taylor Short  15:59  
It's so interesting, we talk about work life balance, right? Like it is very separate. And that's just not the fact. I mean, we cannot compartmentalize, as human beings. We have so many different hats that we show up with. I always talk about if you have a death in the family, or a close friend, or someone really is suffering, you know, in your immediate circle, you don't show up to work, whether that's logging in from your computer or commuting to an office, and then you just put this beside you. You know? You're showing up as your whole person. You have that grief with you, as well. And yeah, maybe we think we're separate, but we are not.

Marisa Huston  16:33  
Yeah, I think it's interesting how in our minds, we separate it, but there really is no separation. Work and life are combined. And in some cases, some people live to work, and vice versa. Everybody's in their own stage in life of what matters to them, where they want to spend their time. It's all personal. It's all different.

Taylor Short  16:53  
Yeah, it is. It's all interconnected. I think that's kind of what I'm trying to help everyone out there who's kind of struggling with transition, what can I do about it? Right? I understand that we're always in transition and things are happening. It is individually unique. But I think at the end of the day, if you can really focus. I love to bring in nature analogies, and I love bringing in just the image of a tree. And it doesn't matter if it's a Christmas tree, a palm tree, a beautiful oak tree, whatever tree pops into your mind. And you think about how a tree survives. So when it's a little sapling, it's going to start to grow those roots and the roots are actually beginning to grow deeper into the earth than it is in height. And really, we all know, just knowing how trees live and thrive, that tree is not going to survive unless those roots are so deep into the soil, because it has to prepare for the weather for the things that are coming up. This analogy for you guys is we can't control the storm. And this transition can feel like a storm that maybe picks up every once in a while and then eases off. Or maybe it whips in one day and then it's really calm the other. But the fact of the matter is we have no control over that. You have no control over the transition period and how big that storm or that weather could come into be. But what you can do is really focus on nourishing your roots. And we do that by doing the things that you know fills you up. So it's going to look completely different for all of us. But you know exactly as I'm saying this, you know what those things are? Maybe it's having a deep conversation with one of the people you love most in this world. Maybe it's going out dancing, maybe it's eating nourishing food, reading an amazing book, what are those things that really fill you up, because that's going to grow your roots deeper so that in those winds of transition, you kind of just sway and you're not being uprooted, you're not breaking your branches, you're able to move with it rather than against it.

Marisa Huston  18:59  
I love that analogy. I was visualizing it, as you were saying everything. It made so much sense. It's really about painting your own canvas, figuring out how you want it to look like and what you want to do and what's required to get to where you want to go and then realize that it's going to be a little bit bumpy, especially in the beginning when you haven't figured it out. But it'll get better. And then you'll look back and appreciate that you took that jump, that you embrace the change because that's really part of what life is all about. Taylor, how do people learn more about what you do and how you can help them?

Taylor Short  19:31  
The company that I have is called Harmonious Return. So my little tagline is helping people find harmony in their jobs in their lives. And I work with both companies and individuals and I'm super active on Instagram and LinkedIn if you want to connect with me there. And my website is www.harmoniousreturn.com.

Marisa Huston  19:48  
The people who listen to us today are likely going to relate to what we were talking about. And perhaps it'll shift their mindset a little bit from a space of loss more towards a space of opportunity, renewal and growth.

Taylor Short  20:01  
Yes, that's what we can all hope to feel more self empowered. Thank you for this opportunity. And you are making so many waves and ripple effects with this beautiful Podcast. I'm honored to be here today.

Marisa Huston  20:12  
Thanks for being here. Taylor. 

Outro  20:14  
That's a wrap for this episode of Live Blissed Out. Thanks to Taylor Short for joining us and thanks for listening. If you have a question or comment for a future episode, all you have to do is go to www.speakpipe.com/lbovm, or click the link in the show notes to leave a brief audio message. If you find value in our show, please visit www.liveblissed out.com to reach out, subscribe and share on social media. This show is made possible through listeners like you. Thank you. So long for now and remember to keep moving forward!