Mother Bleep

We're not We're not doing that. It's not it's not specific to gay people. I'm also really hopeful that the gay cough did like rise and then go extinct in the summer of twenty twenty, which was truly nightmarish when everybody caught that. Do you remember. Yeah, I also fully caught this cold that I'm coming off of from my straight relatives. So there's nothing gay about it. Could not be could not be more, um more from the head

of aero patriarchy. Um, I'm coming off of having a horrible cold, which honestly was most upsetting to me, not only because I was sick, which I hate being sick. But also I had so many cute plans this weekend. I was supposed to go see Titanic and three D on the big screen. Devastated now it's out of theaters. Um. Howd a friend's birthday dinner to go to? And then on Sunday, my friend was taking me to the ballet and I had to miss it. No, what would you know?

What ballet? Was it? Sleeping Beauty at Lincoln. I'm Chakowski is my face. It's the only thing I'll show up to a ballet for. I'm devastated. I had had a whole outfit planned. I was me fit, pick, let's go to the Valet Rose. I think I still want to go. I want to get tickets and go. Um even though, but you know, this was free, so I was very much looking forward to that. We love free. Oh I'm

still flemy. And then of course yesterday was the day I was finally feeling better, and I had therapy this morning, and I was like, you know what, I'm gonna go to therapy. I'm gonna like get dressed up and wear cute outfit and put makeup on and like be alive for the first time in a week. And I woke up this morning in like horrific neck pain because I slept weird, and so I had to do therapy remotely. So it's like I just can't win. My body is falling apart. Oh no, oh god. Honestly, I'm like same

but different Mike. Mike hold is not as intense. It's been like a loose cough this whole weekend that I have tried to party my way through bad idea. I did get COVID tested at the very least um, but now last night I just like found myself getting sick. And do you know what I have been doing with my downtime over the last I guess, like I would say, six five or six days now, I have a feeling

it involves reclining and watching a television show. It involves rewatching Ugly Betty, which I hit play on season one, episode one when I was in New York last weekend and rose I have consumed now almost a complete three seasons of Ugly Betty about to encroach on the fourth. I am honestly I feel insane, Like no, what should you should have feel insane? Because I it tis the season to rewatch familiar TV. I'm neck deep in a Buffy the Vampire Slayer rewatch and I started two and

a half weeks ago, perhaps who am now currently? I just started season five and okay those are these are twenty episode you know, forty five minute long. And I mean to be fair, like I was sick this weekend. I did not leave, as I said, I didn't leave my apartment for days. I watched, um, you know, like a season and a half over the course of three

days or less. Um. So I really have that. It's so much And I haven't even been doing what I used to do the last time I rewatched Buffy, which was skip the episodes that I don't care for umiliar with it. I really have been watching everything. Wow, Okay, I honestly similarly, I was like, let's do it in sequence all the way through. When was the last time

I did it? And honestly, this is like so fitting because I ugly Betty is, as I've said on before, like one of the most formative shows on the planet, if not the most formative show of my life. And I feel like Buffy is the most formative show of your life. Um yeah, I like it's like such a reward for Ugly Betty specifically, it's like such a rewarding rewatch and like we'll do a full episode on it, so like I won't get into it, but like it

is so amazing. It's such an amazing show, and it's so deliciously problematic and exactly the time frame that it came out. It's like a period piece. And also it's a fantasy, like it is in a fantasy. It's it's a yeah, it's a fantasy where in trans women look like Rebecca Romaine. There are some trans women who look like Rebecca Romaine, I know, I mean where they just get to like emerge on the scene. It's like it's a fantasy where trans women are cis women. Yes, yes,

that's what I but everyone calls them tranny and cheta. Yes, we will be doing a Wee Betty episode. Very we should do another Buffy app as well. Um yeah, I mean I do think we covered it pretty you know, Um, we we covered it pretty well. And we also did our recent Sarah Michelle Geller sort of cruel intention but well, never say never. But I have really been enjoying rewatching it because I'm you know, over the year I haven't done a proper all the way through Buffy rewatching probably

ten years UM. But I there are certain episodes that I revisit, like the holiday episodes, like I always watched the Thanksgiving episode of Thanksgiving, the Halloween episodes at Halloween, the Christmas episode at Christmas UM, and then there are a few other episodes that I've gone back and revisited throughout the years. But this is the first time in over a decade that I have truly gone through and watched every episode in sequence, even the ones I don't

really care for. And it's interesting how I'm reacting to it and like favoring plotlines and characters that I didn't like as much the last go around, and like seeing what it's like to interact with the show at the place where I'm in my life now, and like how it's different. You know, art media is ever changing, even though it is you know, static. We we evolve and the shows and pieces of art we love, I guess

evolve with us. Yeah, I mean, I when I'm watching Ugly Betty for the first time post New York Magazine media career, some of these plotlines, Girl, my jaw is dropping because this show that was formative to me as a teenager prophesied so many things that literally happened in my life where I was Betty like, it's correct, crazy, But wait, I want to know. When you were watching Buffy you said some things you're watching, and now retroactively

you're like, I'm evaluating this different as an adult. Can you give an example? Okay, So I was a diehard Buffy Angel shipper the first time I watched Buffy, like Buffy Angel fan fiction with some of the first fan fiction I ever read, and watching it back again, I'm now looking at it through the lens of like, why is this old ass man hooking up with this teenage girl? And like, obviously it's still emotional and powerful, but it's just not doing it for me in the way that

it used to. And I'm at the point in season five now when Spike is realizing that he is in love with Buffy or at least attracted to her. And I was never into the Spike and Buffy pairing quite so much because I believed that she belonged with Angel. And now that I'm watching it slowly unfold or like organically and not looking at it like as something I've already experienced. I like get it more and I'm kind of like, wait, I'm kind of excited for them to

eventually become an item. Now are you saying here and now on this podcast that you are team Spike, No, because what I actually am is team Faith. Faith who is the Slayer who went evil? There is so much subtext there of her and Buffy having a vibey and I remember, you know, I love that. I would love to watch it one day. I I famously still have not watched it all the way through, but I know

I will. It's it's it's honestly, the fact that I got around to a Golden Girls watch is like proof of concept enough that like I can do a Buffy watch, yes, even though I mean the episodes are longer, I'm not. It's it's definitely a bigger commitment. And Golden Girls you can kind of like be on your phone during Buddy It's a little harder to do that. But I have to say, like, you know, fuck Jos Sweden and all, but so much of the humor and the writing really

holds up. And I know that's not um solely because of him, but you know, it's whatever death of the author. Um, yeah, please, we can say the same thing about Ugly Betty, like a show that is like astoundingly ahead of its time and also like horribly horribly like something horrible to watch now. Yes, you know, um, dear Virgins, you might you might have cottoned on to the fact that we are taking our taking our damn time today with little, our little chit

chat catchup moment. And that's because we are not going to have a main discussion topic today. We didn't do news last week, so we're going all in on, you know, catching up. What's the goths, what's going on? So this is just going to be like a true hangout key key episode girls girling. This is a girls girling episode, and we know that you do love those, so yeah, So what's going on in your life? Girl? I know

you're about to make finally the big move. As of time of record, I only have a week left in Los Angeles. Feel um insane. I have not packed a single I know. I'm looking behind you what you're a partner, and I'm like, um, all of your stuff the walls. I'm one of those girls that I don't like to draw out, like tasks that I don't want to do Like, I'm a girl that wants to do it all in a consolidated time period about thirty six hours thirty six

to seventy two hours before. Oh that sounds super fun. Yeah, I mean that's that's my stamina preference. I think it's a better use of my time. But it is also stressful sometimes. But you know, all things considered, I am not very well rested. I was like up all last night coughing and also thinking about a very bizarre interaction. I had just a very bizarre experience I had yesterday.

That's like really fresh on my mind. Okay, I want you to tell me, but first I do want you to give you the chance to plug the fact that you are casting off some of your possessions this weekend. Oh my god, wait, I'm so glad that you said that. Okay, dear Virgins, I am having an estate sale and a goodbye soiree that almost everything must go okay in my apartment. No Weirdosum, you can't get the address unless you know you RSP. That information should be available on my Instagram

profile by the time this episode comes out. Thank you for that, Rose, because I need cash. Not gonna lie I'll get your transparent with all of you, and I have nice things that you can come and pick up. And also all patrons get a mimosa come on by. Okay, So, so tell me about this weird interruption that you had over the weekend. I dyed now, Okay, So I it's crazy because I actually haven't talked to you that much about this yet. But I enrolled in a recreational acting

class or what. We have discussed it a bit, but not not at length. Yes, but I will say I signed up to what I thought would be a recreational acting class, is how I should say it. And honest, this is going to be a little bit of like a fran voicemail length story if you're willing to hear it. But like I, I'm directing some of this year. I'm trying to learn about acting because of that. Have you ever taken acting class? Roos girl, I went to acting

school in college. I always forget about our ghost lives, right of course. Okay, So acting's insane, yes, Like acting is an insane thing to do with your life. And I didn't realize that I couldn't just like come in and be like, hey, I just want to learn about this. Like, I'm like a respectful student that genuinely just wants to learn about acting. I'm not trying to be an actor,

you know what. I see. The problem there is that you're in Los Angeles, where, yeah, everyone is trying to be an actor or at least get cast on a reality dating show. Yes, okay, wait, you are hitting the nail on the head about because Okay, so I signed up for literally eight classes. I was like, let me dip and dip out right before I leave to New York, and if I like it, I can keep doing it in New York whatever. Day one hour one of this class. It is a three hour class. I hate this class.

Like the first hour. I hate this class. In my mind, I'm hating the teacher. She is giving like really like violent erratic energy, like really blunt, really kurt, like doesn't say things that are like mighty to people, like just speaks to everyone in a way that I'm just like, I don't love this, like white woman, Yeah that's an acting teacher. Yeah, that's an acting teacher exactly. And that

was kind of so our one. I was kind of just like realizing things in real time about like what acting is a world that I very naively knew nothing about going into it. I don't have anything in common with anyone in this class. It is a student body like I can only really describe as like twenty or so, like cis gender, nano influencers, and I feel like that sounds right, yeah, yeah yeah, And I feel like I like, I'm like, this class is going to be a colossal

waste of my time. Hour two of my first class, I was like, wait, actually, like this teacher is like really hard on them, and she's pushing them, and like she's actually really smart, and like I'm kind of listening to what she's saying, and I'm like the classes, I should also say, the classes never really explain or described. There's no introductions, Like it's not a class where like you meet each other, you do like fun little games

and exercise ice breaker. Yeah, there's no fucking icebriggers. Yeah no, that's not Yes, it's a cheap, cheap class and you only get to participate in like five minutes per class whatever. It's kind of crazy. Um. And so by hour three of my first class, I'm just like, actually, this teacher is iconic, and I think that I love you Yes, I love her because she's a bitch, and I think that I actually really even if I don't really agree

with how she's kind of treating the students. I fucked with her, and I only need to be in eight classes, so I'm just gonna be like invisible. You think it's fierce. She's mother, Yes, she's kind of giving mother's yeah's mother, Okay, okay, okay. So I'm going to say something else that's probably really stupid to actors. So this class teaches Meisner the Meisner method, Right, are you familiar at all? Somewhat? You might need to

refresh my memory on the specifics of it. To be honest, if I were to try to get into it, it would be so difficult to describe. It's like so annoying and weird to describe. But all you need to know is that it's a methodology of acting that's taught in a lot of to reenacting schools. There are a few different methods, and it's like next to like Stanislavski and like method acting and like, yeah, Stanislavsky was more what I fucked with when I was an actress. Wait, really

you were? You learned much like Gaga the Stanislavsky method. Yes, my college acting professor was a devotee of Staroslavsky Waite. I feel honestly ashamed that I actually don't know that much about your era as an actress. That's that's on purpose, babe, that is my designs. Like you also haven't seen a lot of photos of me pre transition, you know, like obviously this is all intentional. I've seen literally one that you can centrally showed to me on this podcast. Um

one photo. Um okay, okay, okay, back to back to let me. I'm trying to stay on track on the friend voicemail on the friend voicemail here. Um. So this class teaches Meisner from a truly cold outside perspective, someone who knows nothing about acting or about Meisner. I have to say, the vibe is immediately giving cult like immediately like she is berating these kids, kids she doesn't know at all. By the way, like a lot of these students have, like me, have been in three or four classes.

Others have been there for like you know, a month or two. Like there there are tears at which the students have been in the class because it's on a rolling basis. But she is like speaking to these kids like they're her children and not necessarily yes, because she's weather and it's and it's and honestly, it's just it's

it's crazy. So, uh, we have to do this exercising class that's again really difficult to describe, so I'm not going to get into it, but like the baseline is, there is an extremely difficult kind of like technique to learn that requires like a lot of mental brainwork and it's almost like a little bit of a riddle UM. And you do this like repetition exercise that is it's hard,

it's it's hard to do as a beginner. This is a beginner level class and we're all learning UM, and we have to perform these exercises, performing the kind of like this like very specific rule UM of the Meisner School of acting, and these little sketches in groups of two or three at a time, like one after another. So I've been at this in this point three or

four classes. I really have not experienced a ton. I don't know any of my fellow students really, like like we're all a lot of us are in this cold. Yesterday I was an acting class and this woman was on a death rampage like she was like, leave no prisoners, scorched Earth, I want to kill everyone, and I'm in today is the day that you all die? Like it was so I'm not gonna lie. Riveting. It was riveting. And and victim number one, so like there a few

exercises happened. They were going, Okay, Victim number one. A girl gets into this exercise. She is not doing amazing basically because she's not really following this like Meisner rule that is drilled into us. At this point, she's repeating this Meisner rule over and over to us. And this girl is kind of just like that, you have to repeat what the other person is saying to you. It's

it's it's kind of it's it's again, it's it's. So it's hard to describe without me going into like no, no it because yeah, like it's like about scene it's like about scene work and like that. You're like listening before you speak, but you're not but you're not really supposed to. Yeah, you're listening and you're not really supposed

to improvise, right, you're not supposed to be conversational. You're not asking questions, You're just really trying to repeat things at each other until you catch an emotional pinch point. It's so I sound I see I'm participating in the cult. Okay, So this girl finishes the exercise, she kind of that kind of just oh my god, I just said her name. Will you believe that? Okay? Okay, So I just said the teacher's name, and I have to say that this woman has a very satisfying white woman. No, when you

said it, I was like, yep, that's her name. Um, she kind of cuts you off. She decides when you're done. The teacher says what says when you're done? And she turns to the class and she goes, so, what was wrong with this iconic? And she trains the kids to to humiliate the students on stage in real time by repeating the thing that everybody knows that this person on

stage doesn't know. Isn't that isn't that crazy? And she goes, so this isn't working because she's not repeating blah blah blah and all these ds like she's culturing and conditioning the class to Brady. Yeah, acting is any kind of acting school or theater school is psychological warfare? Yes, and through the whole time this whole class, and honestly a little bit in previous classes. She's really like specific about pitting the kids against each other. She goes, she'll say, actually,

like yes exactly, so I'll get into that. But she she goes, did you She turns to the girl and she goes, did you rehearse? And she goes, no, I haven't rehearsed. And she's like really big about rehearsal, and she goes, you guys need to rehearse. You guys need to rehearse or you're gonna show up and you're gonna suck. You're gonna show up and you're gonna suck. And she turns to the girl and she goes, she was like,

how do you think you did today? And she was like the girl was like literally just trying to advocate for herself, Like she's not being disrespectful, she's just kind of like, you know, at our time, I think I did okay, Like she's genuinely trying to analyze herself and goes, Okay, well you sucked. I love her. She's victim number two steps up here, and again not the same mistake, but like a truly a truly honest mistake. And infraction on

like not understanding what the Meisner method is. And this is a girl who is at the same experience level as me, So the previous girl she's been in like another month or class. This girl, like like me, has only met Kathleen three times. I just said her name again. This girl, much like mother, much like Brenda, has only we've we've only met her. Oh wait, sorry, So this girl has literally only met Kathleen like three or four times. Um, I can't believe. I just said. I can't believe. I'm

so sleep deprived. So this girl literally has only met my teacher, has only met mother three or four times. She doesn't do the exercise right. She has watched other students get chewed out. And she's doing this thing that mister people hate, which is acting. She always says, like, no acting up there. I don't want to see you putting on a character. And she kind of puts on a teeny bit of a character, just like a wink. And this woman, this woman to shoots her in the head. Yes.

And this girl was like a teeny tiny little white girl from Kansas City, Like she just stepped right off the bus and she was here to like live her dream like she believed in my will. But Kathleen, Kathleen, sorry, I keep saying her name, And so mother turns the class again and she's like, okay, so why was this weird? This was weird right, like like cuts her. It's so bizarre. She's like, so, why was this weird? Yeah, and she turns to the girl and she goes, so what you

did it was fucking weird. And she goes okay, and she's smiling receiving this feedback, like tears streaming down her eyes, and she's just like, she's like okay, and this woman goes, she goes, if you show up and you do that at your job, it's like everyone's gonna be annoyed with you. You will never work in this town if you show up and do that. She's three class. She's so real for that, and then she love her Yes, she says you, she says, you're never gonna work in this town again.

And then she says, she goes, she goes, what you did up there was annoying. You annoy me, and this girl grinned and took it, and that this is the point in the class. There was also another group of victims where in like someone wasn't doing the exercise properly, so that my teacher went for that person. She choose them out. The other student throws the other student under the bus. It's like it's like their carnivores. Like we're

just trying to survive out here. And I'm realizing, Rose, in real time, that my teacher is lydiatar, and that I am literally in real time experiencing the auditorium scene, and I as a first time student, I am about to get on stage after all of these students have been chewed out, and I am a BIPOC fan gender you said it, and so okay, look we're traumatized people.

I was in fighter flight mode. I was like actually kind of wigging out because I was like, I Rose, you know me, like I will grin and bear a lot of things. I will not let someone disrespect me. No, you you know, and even in a professional setting, I will not tolerate any level of disrespect. And so when if someone said to my face, you suck, I honestly

have no idea like what I would have done. It's always kind of preparing myself for like what this woman, what this teacher was going to do, to me and you slayed. No, I didn't. I didn't slay. And what I thought that was going to be the triumphant twist of this story. Well, to be totally honest, like I have actually been doing I feel a really great job in the class for like what I wanted to accomplish. I am taking this class, and this I think is

a good way to kind of polish it off. But like I'm taking this class specifically because like I'm bad at being in my body. I'm like really bad at listening a lot of the time, and like I feel like it's acting is like a really worthwhile skill set, especially this method that would help me with a lot of things that I want to learn how to do in an outside of Hollywood. And so I'm they're just like genuinely trying to learn, and she's up here being like,

you guys will never make your dreams. You're all gonna suck. You all suck, and I'm just kind of like this isn't my dream and I'm like perfectly fine with sucking. Like that's kind of that was kind of the issue that I was like going through my head, is like I was like, I have no problem with you tell me I suck. I'm not trying to be an actor, you know what I mean, So, like your words don't really affect me, but everyone else in that room is trying to be an actor. Yes, And also no offense

to everyone else in this room. I don't care about

what any of these people think. So like, this woman can try to humiliate me, but like she's not going to And she tried it, she literally tried it, and she started by coming for me by something that I did that was not against the rules of the exercise, but because she was on a rampage, she decided to come for me, and so I was like, look, and luckily the girl that was in the exercise with me also advocated like for both of us, and we were both kind of we were the only students the entire

class that ever stood up to her because she was being crazy, like truly being crazy, but she was also being iconic, and so it's like really hard it goes. Yeah, But anyways, I know exactly who I am and I know my self worth and I'm going to advocate for

that every time. So like what you say to me, like has no bearing on what I do outside of this class, because you don't know anything about that, And I think that it was just weird to experience this place where the stakes were very high for everyone else, and I'm just like kind of a weird fly on the wall slash, Like it feels like I'm in a documentary. Well, I mean, good for you for telling mother to go

fund herself. You know, you never have to deal with this again because you're literally moving across the country, But you know, it is rough for people who legitimately want to be act and the amount of torture you have

to put yourself through to do that. I remember there was one scene study class that I was in in college where we did this exercise where we would have to run up and down the stairs of the building five times and then come in and do our scene, because the thought was that like getting to an extreme level of physicality would bring out genuine emotion. And like, of course, in the moment, you're telling yourself like, yeah,

that totally worked. That was amazing, But like that's not something that's replicable when you're a working actor, which like ostensibly is the goal of going to acting school. And I think a lot of this and probably what you experience is like a lot of teachers are able to tell themselves that it's okay to be hard on their students because of how cutthroat the business that they're going

into is. And a lot of them are failed actors themselves, and they're thinking, like, well, if they can't handle this in class, then it's better that they learned that now before they go out into the world and try to

make it as actors. It is literally it's exactly what like it reminded me of Tyr Banks in America's Next Top Model, where she like choose, you choose if you, as the teacher or arbiter of this space, are choosing to just like just to like participate and to enforce existing oppressive systems in your industry instead of actively wanting to change them. Like it's just kind of bonkers. And the reality is like to be an actor, all you have to be is hot, Like it truly doesn't matter

how talented you are. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I completely agree with that. And also just to as a side note, you have to run up like ten flights of stairs or whatever for like acting, like listen, that is a method that only works if you went too like the Matilda school of like musical theater where they make those kids probably run like fifteen flights before every scene. Honey,

you know I do. I think it's interesting that you are talking about this as a cult, because I've been thinking a lot about cults over the past couple of days. I watched this new Hulu documentary Stolen Youth. Have you heard about it? No? I haven't so Stolen Youth as a documentary about it's Stolen Youth, the cult inside the cult, it's Sarah Lawrence. I totally didn't know that this ever happened, but in like the early twenty tens, there was a

cult of kids who went to Sarah Lawrence. And it was these kids who all lived together and like on campus housing or off campus housing, I don't know um and one of their dads had been in prison and when he got out, came and stayed with them, which is like why would you let it happen? And then he basically like became a cult leader and a bunch of them like moved into a one bedroom apartment in the city with him, and there was like sex trafficking and all this crazy shit. And you know, it's a

very interesting documentary. It's only three episodes, which is good because I like, couldn't have done more, and it's I I appreciate it because with something that's like true crime, I need it to have like a definitive ending. Like I hate a true crime thing where it's like the mystery is still unsolved or like the killer is still out yeah, or like you know, it's the trial hasn't happened this like the trial happened very recently. This guy

is serving sixty years in prison with that parole. It's like it's done. You know, people have gotten out of the cult. There's one girlie who's still like she has only just now disavowed him. But the thing that I was thinking, which is what I always think when cult stuff happens, is couldn't be me. He couldn't he could have never gotten me. I would never have bought into

that ship. And honestly, I kind of judge them for being susceptible to it because like this guy is so he's like so clearly, like he's this like ugly like doughey white guy who just like manipulated all these college kids and like they were you know, they were adults, they were they were like sophomores. In college. And I'm not not to victim blame, but but but I'm victim blame.

But I just I watched this and I just like truly don't get how you can be how you can like, uh like be a sheep a sheep like that and and let this person like the things that this guy had them doing. Like obviously you know some of these like there was one kid who, um, you know, was like struggling with his sexuality and the guy like twisted all of his ideas of like what it was to

be a man. And you know, um, I get that people are vulnerable and could be manipulated, but I just watched these cult things and I'm like, no, not me, because like, if there's two things I'm always happy to do, it's not listen to what people have to say and just stay home. And you know, for the for those reasons, I truly believe I could never be I could never be hoodwinked into joining a fault. But on the flip side, I do think I could very easily start a cult.

Oh I do that I could. I could really um, I could manipulate. I could be a good cult leader and manipulate people into like living or dying on my word. Well, for the virgins, I think that that was implied. It's just very interesting to like look at this. I'm able to like watch these things from such a such a distance and like find it interesting and just fully not understand what could lead someone to think that that was normal. Yeah, I just yeah, I just really get it. I just

really don't get it. It's like being a turf, you know, I don't. I don't get so you can like devote your whole life to something that is like so lame and like unimportant and like just like go touch grass. It's wretched and it's also like not even about you like you are. That's the thing about cults. I honestly I empathize. I also feel like I can be I can feel judgmental about people that are highly susceptible, but

I'm also a people pleaser. Like I feel like I am highly susceptible, and I don't know, It's it's tough. Sometimes this is a grey area. Yeah, um, I do want to take a little trip into Rose's book corner. Yes, we need like we need like some theme music or something for Rose's book Corner. We need like a kind of reading rainbow ass like theme music kind of momentum So, as any of you who have been falling along with Rose's book club no m our. First, like foray into

this was reading man Hunt by Gretchen Felker Martin. Um I just finished it about a week ago. It took me a little bit to get into it, but then once I was about halfway through, I really powered through the end and read it in like a like a day or two. Um. So, the novel is a post apocalyptic zombie horror story in which a virus called t

Rex has decimated the world's population. It's a zombie virus that specifically targets testosterone, so it turns anyone with you know, an abundance of testosterone in their body largely sis men into these you know, like very animalistic, super disgusting zombies who in like a somewhat like different take on zombies not only like eat and kill people, but rape people.

And so that was like a you know, disturbing edition and like for anyone who hasn't yet read this book, like some serious trigger warnings about sexual salt, transphobia, like lots of different stuff, but you can you know, investigate that on your own and so the survivors in the zombie apocalypse are women and m sis women trans women, and that is really the divide of this novel. So there's um. The two real main characters are these two trans girls, Beth and Fran, and they and it's such

a good One of them is named Fran. Her name is Fran fine like the Nannie. Yeah name, I love that, Okay, but it's never really like talked about, but it just that's her name, and I think that's funny. So so they um then and then when the novel starts, they are so they they they call themselves man hunters. They go around um hunting down zombie men to extract their testicles because they're the only source of estrogen in this

post apocalyptic world. They are friends with the doctor who extracts estrogen from the testicles and um like sells it to women like older women with pcos um. And the premise is so it's really fascinating because, like you know, as we've been talking about with like the Last of Us all zombie media, UM looks at the way the world old reforms after it falls apart, and so to look at through the lens of transness, and gender is really fascinating. And so these these women are like out hunting,

they come across this roving band of turfs. So turfs have now banded together to form this thing called the Matriarchy, and they are like a militant organization who you know, go around like killing trans women, and they've taken over

different cities. And then also like in their travels, they pick up a trans man who has been living on his own, like living on the land, and he's very like he he like is really like gun savvy, and he doesn't want to go with them because he has some like bad experiences in his past, but he ends up joining them. They and their doctor friend eventually become part of this commune that's run by this like this

little billionaire girl. There's also another character who is a POV who is part of the matriarchy, but she is a chaser and is like in love with this non

binary sex worker. And so it's like just all these different viewpoints into what this world looks like and the thing most about but I felt while reading this, and I brought this up a couple other times talking about novels written about or by trans people is like reading this gave me this feeling like I would love to only read novels written by trans people, because I only want to read trans characters who are written by trans people,

Because there's just something that SIS people don't get. There. There are ways of thinking that SIS people just don't think about the ways in which we talk to each other, the ways in which we think about ourselves, how mean we can be about each other, Like you know, like the it's there. There are some ridiculous moments where like we're in the we're in the apoc like post apocalyptic world, zombie world, and people are still worried about like how how much they pass, which is how it would work.

How like how fem they are compared to other trans women still like calling each other bricks. Um. It's it's just it's so scary, but it feels so possible, which is I think the best. Um, the best like the when when dystopian fiction is at its best is when

you can see how it would happen. Um. And I also love that like within the kind of thematic question of this book that you're laying out, like a lot of the things you're talking about, like these kind of trans two point zero three point zero conversations or ways of thinking to then be met it on the rest of the world, because it's now become a biological impart, Like it's become a cultural disaster that now requires the help of trans women, and you still like now you're

forced to wrap your head around this in some way or to think about it. Yeah, and then and you see the way that sis people who like would consider themselves allies, how they would behave in the apocalypse. Like one of the one of the main characters, you know,

has flashbacks too. When the virus first broke out, she lived in this like queer commune house and the trans women like eventually were kicked out of it, even and you know, all of the people in the house were like you know, play acted being like devastated about it, and like we're you know, chiding them for their like problematic reaction to it. And it's it's just like a new take on what the world looks like when it falls apart from a specifically not just queer perspective, but

trans perspective, and like they're just it's also extremely funny. Um, you know, at one point they go into this like um, you know, like trans lesbian um like camp and it's like the one thing that survives the apocalypse is Dike drama, which is so funny. Um it is such a Oh. Also, um, at the end of the novel, there's this whole um plot point of this um like ruined naval ship that the Turfs reclaim and they rename it the gall Braith, which is anyone who doesn't know is jk Rowling's pseudonym.

Pen names so fucking funny. So you also you also do find out what happened to JK Rowling in the Apocalypse and it's it's like delicious Okay, no spoilers, Okay, spoilers. Um, let's just say her money could not protect her. And it is really sad, moving, grotesque, hilarious, and I'm so excited to see, um, you know, more work from the author.

And it just really invigorated me about, you know, the future of specifically trans fiction and trans art, because it just shows what can happen when we're allowed to tell our own stories to each other and not worry about you know, like the CIS gays or the CIS audience or the CIS gay Yeah, yeah, exactly, And yeah, I would love to hear what virgins, what you thought of it, if you read it, if you decide to read it after this slide into our DMS and let us know. So, wait,

sounds like a great book. We I feel like we should have some sort of like um evaluation for Rosa's book quarter How many out of five roses? How many roses does it? Oh? Out of five roses? I would get Well, I did rate it five stars on good Reads, five out of five. But but that was like also because I know that this author has been review bombs, so I wanted to do my part in like getting it up there. Um, I would say, if we're grading it on the like a virgin Rosa's book corner spectrum,

I'm gonna say, um, eight point five out of ten roses. Oh, we're doing out of ten? That gives you quite a scale. Yeah, Okay, I think that's important. Okay, good love eight point five, So it's a B plus. Maybe it's a it's an an okay an an. Yeah. I I sounded like it sounded like a knock out of the park. It sounds fine. Yeah, it is fascinating. Maybe I'll learn to read one day. And I do think I do think I have the next book. Oh look it's right over right over your shoulder,

right there behind me a little. And so this so I wanted to do something that is like that is not new and is and I still want to stick with queer literature, but um, a little a different side of the spectrum. So this is finger Smith by Sarah Waters. Sarah Waters is an iconic lesbian novelist. Her novel Tipping the Velvet is one of my favorite books, possibly possibly my favorite book. What, um, you always I've ever your favorite book ever? Yeah? Wow? Um, but I've never read Fingersmith.

It has been adapted into a miniseries. It was also adapted into the film The Handmaiden, which which I've never seen. Um wait but you've never really I've never seen The Handmaiden, but I've heard really good things about it. But apparently the novel is very different. Um. So I started reading it, um a couple days ago, and I'm not that far in so again, like as as we did with Manhunt, like maybe a month from now, we'll check in and

do you know my thoughts in Rose's book Corner? Um, I honestly was trying to pinpoint where i'd heard Fingersmith before Handmaid. The Handmaid is like one of my favorite gay movies of all time period. Rose, you and I should watch it together, we should do a virtue. Okay, well that's well, I'll definitely watch it after I read. Yeah,

of course. And I think that'll be a really nice way for us to talk about it in the next installment of Rose's book Corner, because you'll be able to speak about the adaptation, and like I'll be able to give sort of like a counterpoint of the of the knowledge and maybe I'll read it. Who knows? Do you want to know something? And this, actually I'm realizing in

real time. I used to be a voracious reader. You know this in college before I had an iPhone, Like books where my only friends and so I used to read all the fucking time. Do you know what killed my love of reading? One? Entering the workforce will really kill the imagination, really kill your spare time. Two. I worked at random House for a year. And when you work at a book publishing company, books are garbage. Books

are garbage you used to wipe your ass with. And every single floor, no seriously, and every single floor of the publishing company it has multiple bookshelves filled with free books that I would just like, in my spare time, wander around and collect all of these books, being like I'm going to read these someday and like just slowly devaluing the thing that I love most in the world, which is books. Um. Anyways, that was Rosa's book corner

before we log off. I guess, do we want to do a Drag Race mid season check in because we are now we have crossed the halfway. Yeah. So I am really liking this season. I think it's kind of the best crop of girls we've had in a couple of seasons of main Drag Race. I think after the first four four we're cut out I agree, yes, um and really bringing the interpersonal drama, which I love. Um, which is why I wish we were getting the ninety minute episodes and that they just like feel it feels

like we're not getting enough of the stuff that we want. Um. And then but and you know, um, MTV recently announced that in March, ninety minute episodes are returning, but by that time, there's gonna be like none of them left. Yeah. Um, at least that means more Sasha Colby lip syncing, Like that's all I really want this. The the Lala Perusa episode was thrilling. Um you know some some front runners really have emerged for me. I obviously like still love Sasha Colby and um A Nietra was one of my

early faves. I am a mistress stand first and an American scand period period period. She's so good. What she does is drag like drag in the most in the most classic sense. She is old school Southern painted but painted for the gods will fucking shade you until you jump off a building. Drag queen. And I love it. And I honestly think it's the first time that like a plus sized girl who coming from that drag perspective,

Like truly I think she could win. Yeah, I I it would be really it has actually been a while since we had something of and I'm trying to I'm going through the winners in my brain like something of an old school queen, right like, like I'm thinking about like someone like Beyond adel Rio or something like that. Like it's it's like classic like clown paint like drag.

Sasha Colby also does a version of like classic drag, but hers is like Toagin style, right like it's it's different, like Mistress is captivating I think in the art and also like I don't remember if this was in Untucked or in one of like the debriefs, but like, I love her story. I love that she's literally never had another job and that she had drag as survival to like this is all she could do to like not be homeless. Like it painted a picture of her more

clearly and showed us. I think, what's at stake for a competitor like her versus what's at stake for other competitors, Not that it makes the other competitors, you know, like not worthwhile, but like she's just it's different for her. Drag is life for her, Drag is life. Is there anyone else who you've who has emerged as someone you're into or um? My Top four remains the same, Anietra, Sasha, Mistress, and Spice. I love Spice, Spice has gotta go. I

need Spice like I need Derek Barry. I need this woman on screen as much as possible after your a certain point, like she really showed her ask this episode, even though I will say her lip sync with Malaysia was the second one. Yeah, I think Spice one. I think Spice eight. I think Spice ate her up honestly a little bit, But it was so long ago, I'm trying to remember the nuances of the actual lip syncs.

Like obviously Nietra was the standout, you know, that was that was the moment that was one of the best lip syncs in Drag Race her story. I totally agree, Like it's something that you would revisit, something that will like click back on and rewatch, Like it's so thrilling to watch Sasha perform, especially on TV now. God, I mean, can't even say more. And to watch a Niittra perform

a Nietra just had this. She has this um like fluidity and grace to her um and you can definitely see like she's so Vegas, like she's such a show girl and that and so is Sasha, And like I love seeing that kind of drag be praised on this platform. And I'm just very excited by this cast after like I don't know, a couple of seasons of like sure having a few standouts here and there, but I think this is a very solid cast all the way through. They have good drama, and the challenges have been really

good and um yeah, I'm I'm enjoying the ride. We'll see how we feel after we watch I don't know, two more months of two more two or three more months of this? Yeah okay? Um another midseason check in the Last of Us. Did you watch? Did you watch Sunday Yesterday's episode or Sunday's episode? I did? Um. It was so happy to see Routina West from True Blood back on HBO because my girl Tara stand for Life, which which character was that she was his brother's wife,

the one who was pregnant. Oh okay, who gave Ellie the Diva cup? That was I love. I loved moments like that. That was so funny. Um. I love the heart that the show continues to build, like, I love their relationship. Um. Yes, And I liked that there was a little bit of the passage of time because I

think we needed that. I think we needed them like further solidified into their dynamic, especially after what happened at the end of last week's episode, which was so traumatic, you know, like traumatic and jarring, and you know, I think it was really cool to see. I mean, Pedro Pascale is such an incredible actor, and that scene where he broke down and like finally kind of confessed that he really cares about this person and like and doesn't want to fail her. And the parallels of her and

his daughter is really heart wrenching. And you know this, you know, if you watch the inside the episodes that Atrio does after the episodes, like they talk a lot about how this show is ultimately about the ways in which the different ways in which love destroys people, and I think this was like such every episode is a great example of that, but this one was, you know,

so fascinating on the writing and the acting level. That like scene with Pedro Pascal like is just it's so I'm always in awe of like actors who portray, for lack of a better word, like emotionally stunted people because to act emotion like through this like huge wall that this character has built up, it's like, yeah, you just like have to watch every second of it. It's so so fun to watch. Patrovisk is about to become so much more famous, Like he is going to be booked

and busy. Also, the guy who plays his brother is so hot and so hot to see them kiss. Oh you know what. My favorite moment from the most recent episode after they have their huge argument, which is like, to me, that was the moment that stuck out to me as like where they're just like they're crying and screaming at each other or whatever, and he you know, shows up the next morning and he's like, listen, you can make a choice, and she just cuts him off

and she's like, okay, let's go. So fucking good like it was, I laughed out loud. It's so satisfying, a great writing, great storytelling. I also loved the scene where he goes back to the house they're staying at and I guess that scene is directed is I guess that scene is lifted directly from the game, and they were

incredibly faithful to it. But I especially love that it's taking place in this house, in this you know, bedroom of a teenager who probably died twenty years ago, and it like mirrors um a fight between a father and a daughter, but it's like they're this different version of that, and it's just fantastic storytelling. It's so good. And I just like, Pedro Pascual, sit on my face, Sit on my face. After this gift was shared with a huge ass,

Oh my god, little little booty bump. I haven't even watched the interview, so I don't know the context of the booty bue, but like damn that it doesn't matter. Context doesn't matter. And I also didn't realize I can't remember which podcast clue me into this. Um oh it was Last Culture. Um, I didn't know that Pedro was the buy one from Game of Thrones. You didn't know I watched Game of Thrones in like a in a haze Lucid dreamstay yeah, yeah, yeah, Um that's crazy. Elavender Hayes.

Oh God, I shouldn't have brought her up. How dare you so? Um? Catch up with us on Like a Virgin four twenty sixty nine. Tell us, um, what what you know? What you're into right now? Let us know what you thought of any of the things we talked about. Your thoughts about man Hunt, if you're going to read Fingersmith, your thought about the Meisner acting method? Honey, yeah, have you ever taken do you have any acting class horror stories? Um? Please slide into our dms and share. We we love

it when you do that. Um. I'm your co host, Rose damn you. You can find me anywhere online at Rose Damn you and I'm fran Toado. You can find me at Franz Squishco anywhere you want. Please make sure to rate us on Spotify and review us on Apple Podcasts. It helps us out so much. Like a Virgin is an iHeartRadio production. Our producer is Phoebe Enter, with support from Lindsay Hoffman and Nikki Iatore. Until next week by me Avoi