Fuck They Island (feat. Honey Pluton)

get to watch queer chaos. We as queer people deserve to be, you know, horrible like messes that can like barely have an adult conversation with our love. Absolutely, representation matters, and what I want to see represented is a bunch of buck days on an island, fucking each other and also trying to win money. Yeah, the scum of the scum of like weird people, which is all on one island, Which is why I loved the sexually fluid season of

Are You the One? And that's what we're gonna be talking about today with our hilarious guests, truly Honey Pluton, comedian social media darling. They are going to be taking us on a deep dive into are You the One? Because this is like a Virgin the show where we give yesterday's pop culture today's takes. I'm Rose damn you,

and I'm Fran Toronto. So I know that we said last week this episode was going to be fully about secrets of Dumbledore um or Dumbledore sitting on a secret during a title, But it was just so awful that we decided Um to have Honey come talk to us about are You the One? Instead? Yeah? You JK, such better replacement for sure. Okay, here we are unlike a ver reunited, reunited united, and it feels so good, Um,

because you just got back from the desert. Yeah. I was not at Coachella, but I was at one of the various parties adjacent to coach I thought it was very funny that I called you crying that my dog was sick and we could no longer go and I a friend's birthday party in Catalina, And two hours later I saw an Instagram story you driving to the desert to go to Coachela and Coachella. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

well I was while I was waiting at the animal hospital. Okay, my baby, I did send you several voice memos asking if I did know you did. I'm not saying you, I'm not saying you weren't a supportive friend. I'm just I'm just saying, yeah, yes you did. I had a friend that had already invited me, and I said, oh no, I'm going to be in Catalina that weekend. So when you called and canceled, I was like, well, I'm gonna

you know, do what I guess. Well, happy birthday, Cheno who will never listen to that, will never listen to this podcast. Um anyway, and Catalina Ferry Company, I want my money back? Are they not? Are you? Are they giving you? No, No, one's giving me my money back. No, well I'll still All of a sudden, Venmo requests me for that. Um. Well, since we last talked, though, there's been a there's been a Drag Race reunion. There has been quite a few things going. Did you watch the reunion?

I did watch the reunion. I had nothing else to do. I mean, obviously I was going to watch it anyway, but like I literally spent the whole weekend with my sick dog in my arms. Well, I mean, what did you think? Oh my god, it was so funny. It was really good. I was kind of it was really good. I forgot half of who half of those girls, but June actually had some amazing moments. Corn Bread was amazing

reactions to everything. I also did love the moment where Rue Paul was like, so half of you are trans, now let's talk about that. That was actually really tender moment because you know, the dolls were all finally present and out. Yes that I did love carry Colby, the Sisterhod of the travel Yes, another one, another one. It was. It was really it was honestly, I mean not to like give Rue any credit here, but it was to me, Um, I really like beautiful and almost like healing. To see

that entire conversation not a moment. It would not call it healing, okay, for sure, for sure shealing, Yeah, yeah, exactly. But I think it was shook that it wasn't just a moment. It was a full conversation that they had that spent a lot of time about like the five trans contestants of this show. And I was like, we've arrived at this moment where like when you know, way back when Rue said the thing about you know you've

got yeah, well that too. But also like when Rue was like, you know, if you have boobs, you can't compete or whatever, and I'm sure, yeah, well, I mean, I I was, um, again not going to give to Brew too much credit, but I was really taken aback when at the end of that kind of conversation he specific, very specifically said, you all are my teachers. Like he said that verbet He's like, you all are my teachers. Like I appreciate this, and I appreciate the person who

wrote that line for him. I you know that I I I'm not, again not trying to give Rue too much credit, but I do know that he's very smart, and I do not think that he has necessarily know he wants to be. He wants to be on the right side of history. I think that is where he has arrived. And I don't know his actual politic is because he's never actually held himself accountable and never actually like really apologize for what he's because I'm sure he

doesn't think he has anything to apologize. But the thing is, and I think that this is true at least for me. I won't speak for anybody else, but like, apologies don't mean shipped to me, and actions mean everything. So if he's here having this, well, having the space for their conversation, that to me was what was really beautiful. Well, but also I mean, like the aside from like like Cornbread's reactions, like which was so amazing. I was shook by how

much I loved everything Maddie Morphosis said. You know what, Maddie Morphosis, Loki is really funny, came all the way around, And I guess like you kind of have to be to have that identity in that context, like you have to be able to keep up, and like I do think that throughout the season, and especially in her fight with um Jasmine Kennedy and Untucked, like she she like

held her own absolutely. I think also Jasmine versus Dia was also like I did not expect Jasmine to hold her on and she did actually say everything that she needed to say. And I also didn't expect Dia to, like um like own up to being a dick the way she didn't know. And I also didn't think I would ever empathize with her. And even though I still think that she's kind of like a piece of ship, like I, I did find humanity and like the fact that she's getting a bunch of death threats here. Okay,

so who's gonna win? I'm gonna this is my prediction of what's happening in Oinally, I think, unfortunately, Um, Willow and Anigeria will get like knocked out pretty early in the night, and then I think it will come down to Lady Camden and Diabetti. I think there will be think the and I think Lady Camden is gonna win. That would be so so horrible, Um, I but I know that that's the world that we live in. You know. There there's gonna be a twist that eliminates a favorite.

It's gonna be hard to watch. Willow might honestly get eliminated first. That would be Here's the thing, though, is that what we need? Willow on All Stars anyways? Like I absolutely would stand that because she's already won, you know what I mean, Like, she's already she will probably be Miss Congeniality literally and she will maybe the most beloved contestant of the season no matter who the winner is. The fifth one. Uh Bosco, Oh Bosco is not gonna win.

No no, no. Um. Also, things that did not win was you and I went to go see the quote unquote gay Harry Potter, which is how you framed into me. It's how it was framed literally by a wardener. No no, no, no, no no. They released one clip and you were like, it's the gay Harry Potter film. Well, I was obviously being hyperbolic when I say that this movie was nothing like it was nothing nothing, We can't even make fun

of it, like nothing to even make fun of. No, it was such a filler movie, like because the stories there's they're supposed to be five of them, and this is the third one, and it's very clearly supposed to be like just like setting the stage for the next two, which I don't think are happening for the virgins. Can you contextualize the kind of swirl of controversy that's kind of happening over the course of these post Hogwarts Harry Potter film. Yes, so. Um. I don't know if you've heard,

but Jakie Rowling is a turn. There actually was a very interesting article in Variety which I talked to you about, which is about how this film franchise is so embattled by all of these scandals that Warner Brothers really kind of wants to kill it. Um and all of these insiders saying that they don't think it has a way forward and that like the only way to make Harry Potter work is for them to do something that's really

focused on the original stories. Because okay, you've got j k Rowling being a turf and because of that, like she can't do any press. You know, they're very strict about what the actors like. They don't get to do any like long form interviews. And then there's the Johnny Depp of it all, um, and then choking someone getting in bar fights like which, first all, let's just say

non binary or bad representation again very important. When I saw Ezra Miller's mug shot this like past week, I was like, you know what, this representation really does matter. And I'm not even saying in a joking way, like I think we deserve to have this moment too, you know. Yeah, but um, you know, did you know do you know why they were? Why they were because it was because it was a song, Because they were at a karaoke bar and they were really upset that someone was singing shallow.

Well I would be too, Um. So the odds are very much stocked against this franchise. But you know, it's a Harry Potter quote unquote movie. Um, so I'm sure that people are seeing it, although someone I followed did tweet a photo of like the empty screening they were at, so I'm sure. I mean it's projected. I think to not do as well as any of the other ones, um,

like particularly like post COVID. But I think the last one also was kind of a flop, and it's just you know, he tried to rewatch the last After we saw this, I was like, you know, maybe it's because I didn't see the last one, and it was I

had not well on the way to the movies. Our friend ash on the YouTube video that recapped in the past two movies, and none of us had any idea of what was happening, and like and you know, like I'm a die hard Potter girl despite everything, um and even I like could not remember a single thing that happened. These movies are just bad. And like the gay stuff, the gay, the gayest stuff in the gay Harry Potter

movie was like basically irrelevant to the plot. It was like two lines and Dumbledore talking about being in love with Grinda Wald and then they exchanged some like longing glances which you know were cut for China. That's what I was going to say, the fact that like China could cut it like within like a minute. And well, it's like how they made it that way. They made it so that they could do that exactly. Oh my god,

didn't even think about that of course. Um And like I the cynical part of me thinks like if J. K. Rowling had never come out as a turf, we wouldn't even have that, because it did feel to me like they're they're even positioning it as like a queer love story to show that like she's not she's not phobic against everyone in and of itself transphobic. Like to put like cis gay guys in a movie and be like this is reparative to like trans anti trans harm is

like stupid. But like the other thing about that, like the queer romance is it was not a queer romance of any kind. There's no element of the gayness that is wound through any other portion of the movie in any way whatsoever, point blank period. And also the movie is just bad, it's boring. The only good scene was the crab scene. There's a crab scene. There's a crab scene that as a cancer I found. Um, I really related to Oh my god, what's her name, Jessica? Jessica,

Oh no, we can't, I will talk about her. I was bummed because I am a die hard to Queen's fan and she used to was that show? She was horrible? But it was it was huge mega flop due to content on on like later episodes of Two Queens. She tells a story of how she met JK Rowling and how is this kind of like really transcended experience in very serendemicitis not on tra yea, this is not? And then jk Rowling JK Rolling famously cast her on this spot.

Was like there, we're doing a movie and we think that she's like your sis, right yeah, but like but like this was before this proceeded that the turf controversy. It's interesting that she was able to do a transatlantic accent. But I I mean, because all of the actors are after like a multimillion dollar non disparagement agreements, there's like nothing any of them can ever do or say. Um, Jude Law was like fine, even though he wasn't in

it a lot. I thought when he was first cast, I thought that made complete sense, but he just so fades into the movie. He didn't doesn't really do anything. And I have a lot of issue with the continuity of the Wizarding World and its rules that are displayed in this movie, especially Muggles go in and out of it. Yeah, just like something like the fact that they that Dumbledore

has the meat in the Room of Acquirement. And one of the big parts of the last Harry Potter book is that Dumbledore never knew about the Room of Requirement. And it's like she doesn't even care about her own canon. She is such a bad writer and creator. And the movie just sucked. It was bad. It wasn't even like

offensively bad. It was just nothing. Yeah, And for me, the continuity, the lack of continuity, is really in the fact that the German Minister of Magic looked exactly like Grinda Walt and they were alarmingly similar, and I could not focus. I did like that one of his henchmen looked like if Ron Weasley did ketamine. I did catch that guy specifically because you leaned over and said, that

looks like Ronley Ron. Also, when the movie ended and J. K. Rowling's name came up with the credits, we did boo that. And can we also say in terms of the vibe of the crowd that we were sitting in, everyone was talking through this movie, but we were talking the loudest. No, well, yeah we do talk. We're talking now. Very annoying. But the president was set like usually rosen the only ones like maybe kind of but like was between us. We might as well be on your sofa and your apartment.

But the fact that no one in the theater had respect for this film. Actually there was one person that tried to clap at the well. Also you didn't have respect for your theater because as we were leaving France spilled an entire bucket of popcord on the ground. I was so disinterested in the movie in general that I left to go refill popcorn and soda, which I never ever do. I like, if I had had to, I would have taken a ship during that movie. Oh, that would have been a protest, we all got. I would

have taken a ship on the movie. On the reel. I have to like give everyone a little bit of backstory. Honey, you are, I think, like one of the funniest people I have. I'm not going to say discovered, because that sounds very gross, but when we're in Hollywood, I mean I mean that, and like as in the Instagram discovery what it's called the Explorer page, but it's about discovery, which I think also the for you page on TikTok

was about discovering um. And a few months ago one of your TikTok's popped up and it was the one

can can. It was the bottom one can. Eating ass is actually first base because at the stand up comedian, I unfortunately have to encounter the heterosexual male hack, which is now guys talking about eating ass as this like you know, gigantic ravishing phenomenon, as if for like you and I and you and I'm assuming the listeners at home is not just like a fundamental like basic part a pillar of human sexual it's just part of their diet, right, literalid Right, It's it's like the bottom of the period

the good part or the top the top is the bottom whole grain, not us trying to figure out what And I am a nutritionist in the bottom of the snack, right, So talking about that, and then I think I said that gay. Second base was Dionysed his hero worship and I think is asking your partner what their last name. I think the one that I think, the one that I really liked was the one where you said something like if you see this, you were meant to see it, right, Yeah,

you're a bottom. And then also, um, I did one that was taken down where I said, if you see this, you're meant to see it, you're a faggot and let me community Guideline's So now they want to force it. Um, well, I remember when you did the eating astrict because Rose sent it to me and I was like, is this the funniest thing I've seen in likens? Like I just remember you have such a magnetic kind of like personality and it's so interesting. So we are all just for

the for the virgins. We're all meeting for the very first time, and I feel like I've known you forever, but you have a very um um calming Instagram presence being somewhat I mean this as a compliment abrasive, of course, I was going to say a dirt back absolute like you feel you feel like someone I've done ketamine with at five A and like it's very possible that we have It's like two genders two genders ago, like two names ago, Like oh my god, wait, you're sucked. Excuse me,

I didn't mean to say it. Right now, it's like I'm actually beetle juice, like that's what it is. Beet Juice is such a chosen name hundred percent. But then it's also like I know, well, I was about to say I know a siss baby, but because that's something, but I I know sis parents who name their baby beetle names like that used to be earned, bitch. It's like baby just give their parents trans names now, like it's so unfair. I know it's baby is one of the things I don't want to be. I don't know.

That's what I'm gonna start asking. That's what people tell me they're pregnant and say, oh my god, is your baby sis? But now I feel like babies like when they are trans and they choose that. Like I feel like in ten years, all the trans girls are gonna be named like Daphne, Rebecca, Rebecca, Artemis, Diana, Cassiopia. But now it's like all the Park Slope moms are naming

their SIS babies artimists. Yeah, they're oh my god, trans girl names chosen names are now the names that like sis, straight parents are choosing for their baby Hayden Jack's yeah, not either. The cycle is going to complete itself, so we're gonna go fully back to just naming everyone like Matt and Mike, like just are chosen. Names are going to be like Matt, Mike and John. I think that's more. Or we're gonna be named like you know, our babies

are gonna be named like Facebook. That's what's the next wave of trans people will name themselves like Stephen my new child, better help do com Jessica. Yeah, that's actually that's at a great name. Either Zach or Doc are great non binary names if they were twins. But we did lure you here for a reason, of course, UM, and it is to talk about I think one of the most exciting reality shows, UM seasons of one of the most exciting seasons largely about ever seen UM. And

we're talking specifically about are you the one season? Eight? Eight? That's what I thought eight The what was known, I think culturally is the bisexual season, but what was known literally in copy as the sexually fluid s Oh, that's right, I love sexual fluidity. Well, first, should we give the an explainer of what are you? The one is because I had never watched it, anyone else could explain it because the format is actually extremely complicated. Honey, could honey,

could you lay it out for us? Okay, I definitely want to like hold space for fran by saying that, like me, trying to explain the concept of this reality show is like playing a game with three dimensional chat It's like so convoluted. Okay, So they bring twelve I believe twelve singles to an island, and on that island, each of the singles has one of their perfect pairs. So once so you that has been decided by the show,

by a group of producers. They tell you it's like professional matchmakers, like psychological, but it's but it's experts, but it's in reality, it's like twenty four year old Siss women with brown hair and like Louis Baton never pulled out right. And it's also like so unfair, like that should be my job, Like I love pretending like I'm a matchmaker. I think I have really good taste in

people regardless and like who everybody should date. So when it's like the straight Seasons, then it's easier because it's like, Okay, I'm a girl, so it's one of these six guys is going to be my pair, but on the sexually

fluid season, it could be any of them. So that leads to the mayhem, the mischief, and the math the literal math, no, the literal math and if I remember correctly, So they are given their perfect pairings and they have to go through the season choosing people and if they if they pick the right person, then they all get money, yes, but if they pick the wrong people, some of that

money is taken away. So the way that it works is at the end of every episode they go to this like colosseum where they are literally and they have to walk like pair and pair and sit next to who they've decided is their perfect match. And then there's this massive reveal where if they have posen correctly, then pillars of light will appear from the floor that says that it's the right match. This has happened every time I've hooked up with someone from grinding, what happened literally

shoots up from the floor. Right, It's like the Hollywood sign explode and you're like, I've done the right thing. And then if they do find their perfect matches. Oh no, no, no, no no, no, this is wrong, because there's also the boom Boom room. Oh, the boom boom room is where they fuck. Then it's like a it's another room. There's another room. How do they know? How do they decide that there's open? Then there's honeymoon island. Yeah, okay, so there's a room that they're able to send Okay, So

basically this is what high complicated. But like there's another kind of room island thing that they that the group can side to send a couple to to fact check if they are in fact the perfect match, whereas with the Beams of Light, they don't know who's who they are perfect match. But if they do lock in the correct match, then they get to go on their honeymoon and they like sit the whole season only if they do the correct match in one of the challenges and

not with the Pillars part. Yes, and so honestly, for the listeners at home who have already like started dissociating and doing other tasks, as we try to explain, like but like but like the thing is, it's like messy and like everyone's queer and queer. The rules are like totally unimportant, right, And it was marketed largely as the sexually fluid, the first sexually fluid reality dating. But I think queers written large found it to be a cultural phenomena,

at least intercommunally. Rose and I were working out at the time, and I edited so many fucking pieces about this show, and I never did a whole podcast episode, and I feel like that, like it was just a phenomenon, like you could not avoid it, and it was this seol because it was like I remember what it was like nineteen, Like I would when I was living in Seattle at the time. I would like go to bars and have them play it on the TV live and

should be seen the dragons. Like I would come with like thirty friends to a bar and be like, you have to play the show on MTV for us right now, Like I promise we'll all like ordered cheese fries and get really wasted and we will all like scream and like lose our ship. Because it makes so much sense for a dating show because you look at things like The Bachelor and it's like one person with all these matches and like, of course there's so much drama inherent

and that, but like the drama has an endpoint. There's only so many permutations of messiness that could happen. But on this sexually fluid are you the one when everyone can be into each other, there are just so many possibilities for shenanigans to go down. I was going to say that I watch a lot of reality dating shows. I know, I follow you onely. It really is like my favorite form of any sort of like sociological experiment, because you're just like watching people give themselves PTSD because

they don't want to be alone. Like it's so it's really just like I don't know, just like harves On, what we're all the most scared of, Like are we going to die alone? And I'm willing to put myself like in the pen opticon to be like witnessed doing it. But in other reality dating shows, it doesn't they don't prioritize fucking enough. But in this one too, where it's like that is part of the incentive that you kind of all have to funk each other. Oh my god.

And it happened so quickly because so Remy is a good friend of mine, and like it was of course was a contest on the show. Remy Duran was the first person to go in the boom boom him with I want to think Kai the trans guy who like of course everyone wanted to Okay, so wait, let's let's okay. Look, let's talk quickly about the casting because because a lot of the queer people they were it's a queer season

or whatever. But in terms of casting, you know that the people casting the show are like the cissist most hetero sexual people ever. So a lot of like these queer people look like they work at them all, like they look very normal. But Kai has like universal like queer hotness, Like I think he's like seemed to be attractive to a lot of different terrains and corners. And on the rise, tea boy is like you know, like and like you know, like top surgery scars, he'll down

down right. You can talk about the moment where like Kai was like doing his slight tea shot and he was like yeah, like I have to do oh my god, and like, oh my god, like intromuscular or what. But it was like come on, he was doing it as like a kind of like yeah, baby, I have to do this all the time. Like, but they also had besit who's non binary. When they only hired or like cast like one non binary person, there's like two trans people and then yeah, a bunch of like Zara floor managers.

But besit storyline with I think Jonathan was it was, it was, but it was also really interesting, like how it made Jonathan confront his own internalized misogyny. Period. Okay, so here's the thing that was. Like when I watched the show, which I only watched it recently, I think I watched it in December because I was so exhausted from ed any pieces about it. I was like, I'm

never going to watch the show. And so when I did watch it, I remember seeing that and being like, oh, actually, like I mean, I'm disappointed that like allposite did on the show was like to do emotional labor, like I wish it's it's like twenty minutes on your break and they're like, okay, while you have your like mental camel cry, They're like, okay, this is what being an onn binary literally literally, and so when you know what they might do that at yes, I would what I'm saying, I

would have loved to visit to have found love, but like in that moment, I was like whoa, Like the power of queerness is like eradicating like mascut toxic masculinity from this space. Because there were those two bros that were like in love with each other, but they like wanted to fight all the time. Yes, and they had and they had to have a moment with them. And then when Kai was like sucking everybody, there was like a literal transformative justice circle that took place in a

hot u. And I do feel toxic masculinity ends tonight. Yes, I do feel like and this sounds so like gross to say, but I do feel like they all grew over the course of the season. Like I think it was like one of the one of the rare seasons of a reality dating show where the people who were on it like there they actually like enriched their lives, maybe in a way other than getting like spawn con opportunity. Totally beautiful thing. I totally agree. A lot of the time,

like for reality shows, growth is so manufactured. But it really did felt like they went through that together like they because they all really wanted the money. And I do think that like for those the two bros that were in love, like there were a lot of people on the island or they even on an island or the resort or whatever. They were like, Yeah, there were a contestants that were like that you could tell that they had no queer friends, like that they had not

been in queer community. So for the bros To finally interact with someone like Besit, someone like Kai or someone who is kind of like has the tools or rather is just therapized, you know what I mean, for them to kind of be like, oh, yeah, like this is like how we deal with things here. It's kind of you've never because reality TV like profits off of like everything being messy and you your inability to work through something.

It was kind of amazing to watch like a bunch of queers be like, but let's have this moment to like actually that they're probably used to being the only queer employee us. But that is why the show to me was so like magical and I like aid it up so voraciously and like why all my friends were

just so obsessed with it. Where it's like you get to see one all of the tropes that as a gay person we like collect throughout our lives, like psycholocal girl who like you know, wants to hit him everyone after like three shots of gold Schlager, who's literally everyone you know, like cringe, trans guy who's like sobbing in the corner because he's not getting like the tail that

he wants. It's just like all of the above, like him and the who was it Jenna that he was like with then like kissing in the rain and making up. Kai unfortunately got real old, real facts absolutely, like literally heartbreaking. I also feel like maybe this is like so men and we'll have to edit out. But like Kai was the reason why I was like, I'm going to be a brunette now. I no longer want to be like trans guy with like bleach blonde hair, Like I'm done,

Like I'm putting that aside. I finally I've come to terms with it. Right, So there was that, and but also like Danny, who was like the nerdy one, was like trying to figure his place out in the world and was like a like like so sweet and then it's like him and it's also so funny because him and Kai were a perfect match, and like Kai is like actual like repulsion with that as a reality was so challenging. I was like, dude is so sweet and

cute because I absolutely know that couple. Absolutely. I mean that's the thing about watching the show, we know all of those people. How was the show received outside of I like, I don't even know. I don't know what I wonder And I feel like I would like to see like the Nielsen ratings because there hasn't been another season of another all queer season, because it does raise the question where it's like, obviously, would straight people want to watch it? No? Why wouldn't they? Because it's so

good it was It's such a perfect reality TV. I feel like also like there the show to me, like this isolated season was like the strongest argument for just queer reality shows in general. Queer people thrive in that environment because we make drama and drama, trauma, drinking. There was so much fucking five the five Oh yeah, there was.

There was five in the five songs. I mean, if you're, if you're, if you decide to watch it on Paramount Plus when you get home, y'all should let us know who was in the five songs because I want to know.

But there was a five song, yeah, and we would have everyone who is in the five song honest a guest, yes, but it's funny too that you were talking about math, because the last episode of the show was I think it is carry just being like, we need to stop fucking each other and we have to figure out who are perfect matches through and Danny and Dan Danny the nerd and they literally like also, I love Carrie did not get enough play. She was like perfect hak girl.

Same with Kylie, and she didn't get enough really open to Kylie, really want. I think they didn't have the like psychosis necessary to be good reality exactly. It's not like Jenna, who like wakes up in the morning and is still like in TikTok by Kesha and I'm going to end someone's fucking life tonight. I closed down every

bar and like Landsing Michigan, like just so frightening. I'm gonna I'm gonna break my morphie blending breast in half and pull it out of your chest and do some really bad imake literally or like justin Avery r Max, who were like, We're putting on a Hawaiian shirt and Chelsea boots and we are going to start conflict every night. The gay guys they well they're not gay there by um,

everyone's faggot right. It's so funny because like you think on a show like this that like the you know MLM, and I don't mean not men loving men um like that they would be the sluttiest and most promiscuous. But they were, funnily enough, the people who coupled up the quickest, I know, subverting gender norms that But it was the w l w's. Yeah, it was these like crazy dikes that just like ran through each other formula one style,

like so fucking nasty, like one after the other. Because I I but this is also something that feels very true to life. I was going to say a tenant that I believe with all of me is that Dike trama is more fundamentally destructive than faggot drama. Trauma has the half life of like a ladybug, like in and out, But Dike drama is like trauma, it is time and time again, like these Dikes feud for and the question

for you have you watched Tampa Bay's. Tampa Bay's is a reality show on Amazon about a group of lesbian friends in Tampa and one of them has like returned from being gone for a while. She's like in in like Tallahassee, and she comes back and everyone's like, oh she's back. Her name is Cubby Cuffy not Cuy, and you're like, I know, the wrong consonant um. No, When like a Dike comes back, it's like you're back from war. It's literally it was like the beginning of Gossip Girl.

It's like someone saw Serena gritting off the train of Grand Central, but they're all lesbian. When a faggot moves back to town, it's like, hey, girl, do you want to go to the mall? Like I didn't realize he left because I know like twenty people who look just like you. Of course, no, but it really is extremely true to life. Well that was I mean, that's the

funny thing about kai On. Are You the One? Was like, was very much this energy of someone we all know in far spaces, of a trans guy who like is still approaching relationships through the lens of like lesbian culture, but wanting to be approaching relationships through the lens of gay male culture and as like an annoying funk boy. A precedent to DAS. Honestly, second season Are You the one?

If DAS existed, they absolutely would host it. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean maybe they water season a funck Boy Island on HBO. Have you watched fun Boy Island? I have love beautiful, perfect, and I just love I love a reality dating show too, because I like to have what the like pantheon of attractiveness be reflected back to me and then for me to be like wait, what, like I love I love being shown like these are America's hottest bachelors and I'm like, what, like why that's so

t that's so true. It's like a marvel to see what people are attracted to. Totally, the most nondescription people think the most attractive queer people are manager because on The Bachelor, you see all these women fighting over someone who like he is the most gorgeous person I've ever

seen in my life, and he's like all fourheads. Okay, But I do think that the people on Are You the One are like, I think, like more believable, Like they look like they're like hot, but they also like look normal totally, and I don't know any gained normal

people know me either, not not my world. When the show, like first, when it was first kind of coming out and marketed as like the sexually fluid season, I remember feeling like very allergic to that because to me, like to be sexually fluid is kind of a thing that like pr girls tell like straight celebrities to say about their gender to evade controversy that they that they're doing or honestly like Lucas Hedges or like other like they're like slevies that have done that before. What's going on

with her? I don't know, We'll see, but like anyways, I felt like I was like, that feels very like they should just say queer, you know what, But they think it's a bad word exactly. They think it's a bad So it was to me sexually fluid. I'm like, calm, piss It's like when I when you when I read sexually, I like sexual fluid. It's the first Pisskake season. Are you the one? It's the first like slipping slide like

squir Anyways, I was the first all Come season. I remember being like really kind of like disarmed by the p s a s that are at the end of every episode that if you would like to support the sexually fluid community, if you want to support the community, like my whole life has been has been committed to supporting the sexually fluid community, usually through sexual fluid. I am sponsored by Sniffy's for sure. Um, but I remember what is Sniffy's. It's like the darker it's Grinder, but

even Grinder, but it's on a web platform. Yeah yeah, you can't. It's Grinder for desktop and like no faces ever, no faces pictures, pictures, but just concord. But I do remember when I started watching this show, I was like, like actually very surprised by the effortlessness of the fluidity within the show. Like someone was like fuck a boy,

like and then a girl. I don't like that. That was really the only times people were like contesting with their sexuality was when it was like justin and or like or what it was like bit and Jonathan and then Jonathan had to be like, oh, I'm having my own moment. But it was people were like slip and slide and who care? And then I remember it thought about parts. It's about hearts, and I remember like the kind of like we ho brows that are on the show.

Like I remember being like, there's no way you're going to sleep with a girl and like and then they do, and it's so crazy because this is on paper, Like I heterosexual relationship, but like, you know, the snake has eaten its own tail and it's queer again. And I'm like, how is this? How does this feel like more radically queer than if they were like making out with the guy And I'm like, if Max could fuck a guy

and girl, I'm like, what's my excuse? You know what I mean, It's like everyone watching at home, it's like, let's like, let's get some fluidity going. It's like, let's if they can do it, we can all do it. I just think it's part of like the pan sexual, bisexual, queering indoctrination of the world that I wish to see. We're all just a series of holes, and just of the show that we haven't discussed yet is the relationship expert element of that. Remember her name? I'm sure it

was like, I don't know, like Greta or Hannah. Yeah. She it's it's it's like it's like Mrs Doctor who has like a very like pink misunderstood haircut. Yes, and then like one gigantic tattoo's giving a brown She grew up like I don't know, like on like long beach round.

She you knew how to surf and well apparently they like they interviewed like all of their like exit apparently they like interviewed all of their like exes and like moms and basically like, can you imagine like what it would happen to you on this I'm just gonna say it island, um because it's a it's an island in my brain. Can you imagine what would happened if you were a contestant on this show and someone has interviewed everyone you've like hooked up with or like been in

a room? How would they find though about me personally? All my exes are very scared of me. Yeah, they would. They would like they would like go through all my old Craigslist emails and people would be like who oh him, Oh yeah, okay, it makes sense. It would be a lot of people be like, good, good for her, she l a, she's happy. Good name? Love that my name?

Please don't ask them, do not ask my name. There was a challenge they had to do with the Relationship Expert that I do think is brilliant, where they had to put together a piece of ikea furniture coup like that's actually like whatever. In turn wrote that that's like so brilliant culture, lesbian culture. I would say, I'm I don't know if identifies a lesbian identify as a Dike for sure, and then in like a Dike relationship, and I don't put it together. That's none of my business.

I do think that I do think Galaxy Brain would have been making them go to Ikea, but they probably I don't think. No, they're like on the island off the coast of Cuba, will if you try to leave your electrocuted, so there's no I keas there. I remember that challenge was really surprising because the large majority of the things that they have to do, like in terms of like activities, programming, challenges, are actually very they felt very not of the queer imagination. Yeah, I mean I

think they had except for the Glitter Party. Yeah. That they're the queer problem, the dot sponsored queer problem. And they're all like mervays. That is the that is the first thought for like queers being um, you know, like free and like yes, it's always mermaids, right, and I know, but that but also it's like I guess one thought I'm having about why mervays come first. It's like, but where's the whole But if queer people could figure out how to fund as mermaids, it would be queer people

how to figure it out. Yeah, yeah, the technology is there, we have the technology, will just make a little shim like cut a hole out. I'm like usually very cynical when it comes to things like a queer problem or whatever. Like I think, I don't know, it wasn't even working idea so long. I've just kind of seen the same

idea over and over again. But my heart melted so hard during only like watching these boys put glitter on and be like, oh my god, so middle school, we're watching a one a grind train, like five people all like a fac right, it's like all like breaking it down in slow motion. Yes, where it's like you're throwing glitter in the air and playing. Someone has to clean that up, right or I guess it just becomes like the microplastics that we like eat now it just goes

back up and becomes toxic. Ran But yeah, it was extremely wholesome, and I usually detest anything that's wholesome. But I just think that they have all been like somatically processing their traumas so immensely, like they deserved that. Well, that's The thing is the season started out like so horny, and you're like, oh, yeah, they all want to fuck each other. Yeah, the first sexually fluid season of the

Are You the One? And then it turns by the end surprisingly sweet and in the last episode they all want to work together to get the money and with straight people that would never happen. I've never watched another season of the show, but I already know it wouldn't happen. Like and with at least half the cast in the first episode. You watched the first episode, You're like, I'm not rooting for you. I'm not rooting for you. Don't

remember you, like there are a lot of people. You're like, there's I'm not invested at all, and you become invested in pretty much every single character. Is kind of arc because it does really feel hurt and it is beautiful that they were never until like do date the clock is striking thinking about making money. They were like, I'm really just here to like fucking suck, and then they were like, wait, all right, there's a million dollars. I guess we can like make a flow chart really quick.

I don't know if you all know this, Like Industry Insider scoop. What do they eat on the island? They soil and I think they had to cook for themselves, so they weren't eating they like they're they're fridges stocked and then they have to figure meals out themselves. Oh my god. So they were just I don't know, eating like Keena the whole time, Like what do you remember watching them eat a lot of Ben and Jerry's? I would Ben and Jerry, but if you like, I hope

it's like, what can I say? I know, how would they I guess they could just bring um? Yeah? Did or did they provide that? Like that's what I was wondering. What was in the house? Like was their shell full of condoms, douches, lube poppers like um, like a shoot of a laundry machine, sewing sentinel strips, yes, sentinel right, a little like you know, place for your for kai syringes to go? Yeah, where is he depositing? Yeah? I'm shocked that no one else came out as trans over

the course of the season. Well it's so true because I'm not watching drag Race right now. But isn't that everyone everyone girl, girl girl half of the cast is trans and you know, RuPaul is in his trailer like throwing things at the literally he is like melting and shrinking, and he's like becoming a little raisin. Yeah, it's the

best way to stick it to him. But that's the thing, is, like it sucks that actually that Drag Race is the only queer reality show, like the only one that has made it to the mainstream or even anything even close to the mainstream. Well, I had a little there's also Queer Eye. Well but is that a reality show. It's more like a makeover. Yeah, you know, well I having a reality competition is what I meant to say, reality competition.

I had like a tweet slash Instagram post that went viral where I said I love reality shows because I like watching straight people be psychologically terrorized. And so some people saw that it did some numbers, and then some people were commenting like, oh, well, well do you count drag Race, And I was like, yes, yes, absolutely, yes, of course I like when gay people are psychologically terrorized more.

Obviously it's community harm. That's what we're here for. And this season did, of course have the first six heterosexual contestant of h Yeah, so at least one straight person was being terrorized and he was being terrorism. If you got to conceptualize the reality show where you got to terrorize straight people or queer people, what would it look like. It would definitely be a data show. And I've always thought about this. I also really want to be on

reality TV one day. That's definitely a goal of mine. I don't really know where I would be able to fit into that, but I believe that with enough like diversity and inclusion training, they could have like they could fit like a rancid like non binary with like chip teeth, who like whose fingers are always sticky, like somewhere to play. But I think, I really think it would be all of the dating shows combined. And I think that the twist would be maybe that they like. Well, I think

what I would want and what I don't like. Here's what I'm trying to say. There would have to be a lot of fucking. It would have to be like a fucking centric show. Would have to be part of the concert exactly. Literally the one comes the one where I don't I think that there would be psychological Oh no, here's what it would be. You would be psychological warfare. Because it would be the first one that's somehow threaded in polyamory, feel like or are you the two are

many people? That's the thing about are you the one? Is like it's still a very polyamorous it's it's well it is, but like it's still a very heteronormative end goal because they all have to have one person. So on your show, we're turning that on its head, right, So my show would be like lots of fucking would be like polyamorous where there could be more than one person you could end up because then that then that

makes it even messier and more complicated. Like maybe people would go on with their polycules like wife swap, but like polycule swap, or it could be like more get me in the barroom, or maybe it's someone's like punk squad,

Yes exactly. I think that would be great where it's like, how can we make all of them do their dishes somehow somehow chore wheel because like Resort Island is like to it's not it's not queer enough, Like it would have to take place at a squad, Yes, it would have to take place like in the mountains of North Carolina, where it's like where are all of the queers like living in their land projects and how can we follow

them through there? But I think I would also really want to have one in the vein of the real alt word, where it like happens like in Los Angeles. I love like that, so where it's like the old style where you're in the city, because I love like Dike drama that happens like at a bar where oh, who's just walked in? You know where I could see this happening is in New Orleans because New Orleans has a very like a very femilining queer community and it's

like very punk. Everyone suck each other and they fight and they fight, they fight fighting. Okay, so we're so the real world, but the polyamorous Okay, so it's like Paul, It's like polyamorous fat life somehow, right. Sex workers are their challenges are still games because I like the challenges because it forces people to work together. So I think some of the challenges would be like I need you all to like make up for Tata after like doing

a line of Kendemy. And we also need some kind of twist, because that's what all reality dating shows need now, is some kind of gimmick or twists. So the twists would be what if we forced some of the people to transition. I as, yeah, we would have to transition would have to be like a good like forced feminizations, like you take them like you take the most like Muscily, like we ho gay guy of the pack and are

like your name is Iris, now up. Yeah, and it's like giving you like a skim's body and like just like twenty four hours where you can't go to the jam and we're just gonna see what happens. Yeah, maybe it's like if we're doing it like punk style, it's like we're forcing them to like live away from their animals.

I think that extremely challenging. My god, I have like your dog with you while you were like traversing these lines of like your psycho sexual And it could be part of the twist is that they told them that they could bring their dogs and you can't anymore. But I don't know if I would want mine to have

a twist. I think that I would really want it to be like you're coming and looking for love, but you can bring your existing partner with you, but you're like polyamorous, so so it's like you're going with your partners looking to expand your polycuele and then the challenges would be, like you all have to like go to Costco together, but none of you have a membership, so you have to like figure out who's going to sign up for it, or like one of you tries to

like get a like get a credit card. You have bad credit, like you would have extremely like banal all things you have getting you have to wait in the pharmacy line at callum lord. Literally you have to fill out literally one like form, literally one form, just literally anything that requires a signature. Try to get a rental car from enterprise, you have to go. You have to

go to a party where you're not on the list. Heartbreaking, heartbreaking. Yeah, So I think some other fun challenging a plant alive Maybe that would be hard, pimple popping fun things said I love to do with my partner. You have to you have to drink dairy milk. Well, the most controversial thing about me is that when I very rarely get any cream in my coffee. But if I do, it's actual cream. If I do, you're not queer. I'm literally heterosexual.

I'm just transitioning to straight. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I get like a quartado with whole milk, and everyone's like, wow, I like drink milk anymore. And I used to love like I would love a glass of whole milk when I used to be a nanny in college, Like one of my favorite things was that they bought really bougee milk. And when I ate dinner with the kids, we would all have a glass of milk and it helps. So decadent,

that's white culture. I'm sorry. Eating eating having a glass of milk with like a whole plate of pasta is like disgusting to me, like to meat milk, and in theory, in theory, it does sound good to me now, but like I know that I couldn't do it and that my body would feel so disgusting afterwards. Well, I have a joke where I'm like, set a cheeny carbonara literally has the ability to put my friends in the hospital. Chicken Alfredo is like a public health risk, like the

novel coronavirus food. It's like that is like more damaging. If there are any Los Angeles based virgins out there, I am throwing a party called Gorgeous Gorgeous sit down in downtown l A. It is you know, a cute little pop music party for some queer and trans ends. I will be forcing Rose to go um even though I'll be there, I already bought a ticket. Did you really? Oh wow? I love that you bought a ticket. I mean,

I'll be there on the early shift. I will be there, like you know, when the bar opens for twenty minutes. So if any visions want to come and talk to us for the first twenty minutes of the party, we will be there to schmooz um. I won't promise that I will talk to you. Can find the ticket link in my Instagram bio is tomorrow technically this Friday, April at a resident downtown. We will be back next week with a discussion on god knows what I think we're

going to figure out. You know, we're we're playing it by your girls and gays end bays And as always, if you have suggestions for what you want us to talk about, UM, you can call us at three to three pennants that's three to three, seven three, six to six to three, and you can leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. It really helps us a lot. I'm your co host, fran Dorato. You can find me wherever you want at fran Squish Co and I'm Ros damn You. You can find me on Instagram, TikTok, Twitter at Rose

Damn You. You can subscribe to Like a Virgin anywhere you listen and leave us a rating on Spotify a review on Apple Podcasts. Like a Virgin is an I Heart Radio production. Our producer is Phoebe w Inter, with support from Lindsay Hoffman, Julian Weller, Jess Crane and Nikki Etour. Until next time, see you later, virgins Chow