Hi, Catherine. Oh hate Chelsea. I was with my sister in San Francisco, caretaking for her because she had that surgical procedure. Oh my god. I was such a good nurse. I was like, okay, yeah, she has this huge scar down her back which was really gnarly, and I was like listen. I was up there for ten days over Thanksgiving, in between my tour dates, and I was able to like be there for her, which was very meaningful. But right away I was like, let's get into some physical therapy.
Like I brought bands, I had my like pilates ring, I had like very light weights. She's like, Chelsea. They told me not to do anything for six to eight weeks, like you're not a doctor. I'm like, bitch, I am a fucking doctor. And until the physical therapist, because we had to wait to find a pt that could come. She was gonna wait a month to go to physical therapy. Finally I found, you know, through my assistant. She found somebody to come over to her apartment. Right away gave
her every single exercise that I gave her. The physical therapist is like, now you do, and she's looking at me. She goes, oh my god, you are a doctor, And I was like, I am a doctor, Simone, Okay, you need to follow my lead. You need to keep your at moving at all times. That's how you gain strength. That's why they make you like get up after you know, six hours after the worst, most gnarly surgeries. They make
you You've got to get up right away. It's not like forty years ago, you know what I mean, Like, you have to build strength. And we'd go for walks each day. We would add a thousand steps and by the time I left, we walked over the Golden Gate Bridge together and Shoppy, oh my god. Yeah, she was in great shape. She's like, wow, you really know what you're talking about. I was like, yeah, I do. She's a medical professional everyone, and I know you have a
cold this week. But we actually recorded most of this episode with Otsko a few weeks ago when we were all in the throes of midterm elections. Uh, Chelsea, I have a time sensitive question that I wanted to get your opinion on. So Karen sent us an email. She's thirty four, she says, Dear Chelsea, I'm the youngest child of a mildly dysfunctional family and have two older sisters
forty and forty five, respectively, and an older brother. All my siblings are married with children, and I'm the KIANTI to eight nieces and nephews ranging an age from eighteen down to two. I'm in need of your perspective and advice. My brother and sister in law just sent out an email to myself and my two sisters stating how that now that their oldest is eighteen, they don't want us giving presents to her for Christmas or birthdays. They said,
we have to stop giving gifts at some point. I disagree and replied, stating that I think gift giving is the voluntary choice of the giver, and so if they don't want to give anything, don't. But you can't tell me not to, especially about giving a gift to another adult, even if they are your child. It's been over a week and it's radio silence on the group email, no replies, but I know that she has since started side messages
with each of my sisters. I've come to terms with my place in the family and the fact that I'm given less credibility because I'm unmarried with no children, even though I'm an independently successful woman in a high powered career, my own mortgage, retirement savings, and have traveled the world. But what do I know? I'm not sure how to go forward with Christmas? This here. I love giving a good gift and seeing the joy on someone's face when
you nail it. I don't want it to feel like I'm punishing my brother's kids by not giving a gift to them either, since that would only be fair. What should I do, though? Do I give nothing to everyone? Do I leave one out or three out? Do I give extra presents to spite my sister in law? Do I make a donation in their name or buy them therapy sessions to unpack their childhood? Help? As a fellow youngest? What do I do? I'm at a loss. Karen, Oh, Karen, do your thing, Get your gifts for all of your
nieces and nephews. Don't overdo it. Just do what you would normally do. Nobody can control whether or not you give a gift to somebody else. That's their prerogative. If they don't want to give the gift to their eighteen year old kid, you're that You're an aunt, that's your specialty. That's what we're here for, is gift giving, so keep continuing to do that. I co sign exactly give those gifts. Amen. But anyway, this episode is exciting. We take this episode earlier,
you guys. It's with one of my favorite Comedianssko Okotska, who's special is now available to stream on HBO called the Instruder, and she's our guest today and she's fucking funny. So get ready Otsko Okotska, everybody say it three times, Katsko cut Scott, thank you, Chesse. You know what it is. It's actually Chelsea, It's it isn't my yarka. Do you all remember it is? It's Chelsea. That's that's like they
always have to add like a little flare right. Well, my my German grandmother used to call me Chelsei and I fucking hated that pronunciation. I mean she sounded like such a Nazi every time she said it. Nine yeah, nine is no in German. How's the Spanish going? Thank you for asking? Actually, yeah, pay attention, and you know what it is. When you know Otsko Kotska, it's just like so different than than Spanish. And I'm like, oh,
maybe she's got Spanish brain. Well that's a great use, but no, I mean, I've been taking Spanish lessons again. My Spanish is getting very good, actually not very good, but like my Bell now speaks to me only in Spanish and I understand of what she's saying rather than it used to be. And now I can speak in the past tense, which I learned through my tutor. So it's developing, and I'm just going to keep my practice
in my books every day like a little girl. Well not every day, but like once a week I do my workbook for my homework for my Spanish class. So it feels good. Like I like to learn, you know,
and I'm so into language, so it's perfect. And my Bell is like I was talking to her about like pronunciations and she was like, oh, you know, you don't say that in Mexico and I'm like, well, no offense, but like I'm using this for Spain and she's like, well, I just only know it in slang, and I'm like, well, no offense either, but I'm not trying to learn slang. I'm trying to learn proper Spanish that I could speak regionally,
and I had different sorts of regions. She's trying to make you relatable to the streets yeah, yeah, well, exactly how many languages do you speak out? I speak three, but I feel like all of them not that well, and one of them is the one I'm talking to you in. You know, it's really just like a lot of its improvisation. What are the languages that you speak? I speak Mandarin, Japanese and English and oh oh no, no, she's been moisten. O god, and it's fruit punch flavored
electrolytes because I'm eight. Oh, it's okay. Why does that stain? Yeah, that's okay. I'm just gonna have a stained shirt. No, No, it's okay, don't worry. There's nothing that's gonna help it. I'm drinking during this podcast too, so hopefully I also have a spill. I'm so shy. She's just like that a maxim is that a Maxi shield? I have Maxi shields before you though, okay, I give them to every guest before Maxi shield it's for you put in your
Pikachu when you have your period and your underwear. It's like a little padne. But I like the word shield, yeah,
because it sounds ridiculous. You know, I was like, I need to know that this new invention I don't use that because I'm getting what they call an ablazeon next month before Christmas as my Christmas gift to myself, which means they go inside your uterus and scorch it, blanche it with steaming hot water so that you don't bleed anymore, because I'm so sick of getting my period, like I'm over it. So it just gets so hot that your uterus just goes like no more. It's just you're killing it.
You're killing the blood, so the blood. Like one percent of people have a period again after they do this, But my sister did it because my periods just like you know, I don't I don't want to deal with this anymore. And you know I have too much other ship to deal with. I don't want to deal with it. Yeah, every three weeks, it's like again again again it's supposed to be every four weeks. Are you getting your period every three weeks? Because I'm a guy to cologist? Oh
isn't that every Oh it's oh my gosh. You know mine comes at different times. We're very different people. You're on it, you know, I see your videos about like this is how you pronounced this word. I'm the type of person that's like, look, you know what I meant, you know, and you just imagine what I meant. But honestly, I thought it was every three weeks, because then a week is when I have the period. Can you make sure the cameras on? Because her price tag is still
on her clothing. That's what I'm saying by we're different people. I used to do this everyone I worked. Your price tags are still on your clothes and you gotta return this or should I take? Can you tell me how much it was before? I'm okay put it back in because I'm still thinking about I thought, for some reason,
this was like a sale one. Anyway, Otsko always wears the same outfit when I see her, and so I'm convinced that she went and got this outfit just to be like I have different outfits because she's like I listen, you've seen all my outfits already. Oh girl, I'm going to free people right after this. Yeah, I'll be like, do you take returns after I've been near a spill? Maybe you should try and return this as an extra challenge. You've already dried up, just like your pussy is gonna do.
I'm so excited for you, just like my pussy is gonna dry up right after that ablation. There's really nothing grosser than dry pussy. Like even when any anyone says anything like that, it's such a disgusting thought. I know, I know that's not what I meant. You know. What I meant was I'm so stoked for you that that that you're never going to get your period again. It's all I dream about, it's all that's what I'm doing
it for you, and I can't. You know, I don't use tampons because not that it's like, oh I'm so small down there, but it always falls out. Yeah that means you're actually big if so that is a problem. Oh right, yeah either way. Yeah, So I hate using pads.
I just feel like a baby once a month. I don't, like, I've never used a pad, even the first time I got my period, I think it was thirteen, and my sister came into the bathroom and she was like, Okay, you can use this or this, and I was like, I'm gonna not gonna walk around with blood floating between my legs in like open areas, Like that's gross. It's so gross. But I guess some people really don't tampons. I swear to God a tampa. I do not know how to keep it in. That would be the advice
I ask you about later. I mean, we could to keep a tamp on it, and I'll show you we can do some kegels. But had to wrap this episode up when where I swear it's not because I'm too big. I think it's because I'm too small, Like I literally, are you putting it in the front? Are you putting in the back? I'm putting it what like, Okay, this is a trick question, but what do you mean back? You know that when you get your period, you're supposed to put your fut in your asshole, and they put
it in my PV hole. What do you think I'm not? I'm not bird brained. I have Yeah, obviously I'm putting it in where you're getting scorched. That's why I'm putting where you're putting your tampon it and it falls out no matter what size you use, yes, like yeah, it's it's just always halfway hanging out. You know what, I don't understand about tampons. And this sounds really stupid at my age, but I am stupid about a lot of things.
So I'm just gonna say it because my old assistant Karen Whacker, told me, She's like, you know, your tampon isn't going into your p hole. It's going into your your vagina hole where you have sex out of. And I was like, okay, but then why when I pe,
does the tampon get get wet? Yeah? I do have that question too, maybe because it's like falling out a little bit already, Like especially if it's already a little bit soaked, it can fall out a little bit and then you're like, oh, no, this is it's got p
on it. It shouldn't be getting that. It does, though, it does every time I take a tampon out, even if it hasn't come out a little and I've paid with it in like if you because for me, I'm always like, oh, I just thought you always had to take your tampon out when you pee because it was coming out of the same hole. And this was until I was in my thirties and someone explained to me it's a different hole, and I was like, oh, ship shitsky doodle again, wait way to come late to the party.
And then I was like, but wait, why does it always get wet and it comes out a little when you pee, sometimes the tampon can come out. That's that's what I'm saying. Maybe because you're bearing down, are you bearing down a little bit? I mean I'm always bearing down at all time. There's always some thing in there, and I have to hold on to whatever is in there. Even when I'm driving. Sometimes this is stick shift. Sometimes it's just like, don't come out right. That's why I'm
a pad girl. That's why I walk around like a baby every month, and one day soon I will do the ablation to ablizion ablation. Yeah, ots go is another person that isn't looking to have children, so you could get an oblation. Right? Are you still there? Do you still feel that we're still there? I don't think that's going to change. People would say, oh, you know that clock it's gonna hit right, and I'm like, what what clock? I know that much about myself where I don't think
I'll change. I know, I know it's so annoying people still ask me that I'm forty seven years old. I'm like, when are you going to get the fucking message that I can't have a baby anymore? Yeah? Like little things change, like maybe my favorite color, but like you know what I mean, Like, I'm not gonna a whole life change. Okays, talk a little bit. Tell everybody about your history and how you moved over here, the circumstances about how you
moved over to the United States, because it's a fascinating story. Yeah. So I came to the States when I was ten. My uma said we were coming for a two months vacation, and then she had us oversteered towards visas, and then we became undocumented, and then we were stuck here, and then I made the best of it by doing stand up comedy. You lived in a garage, right right, Yeah, I lived in my uncle's garage with your mother and
your grandmother, with my mother and grandmother. It's like if you've seen great gardens, it's kind of like that, but let's less room to move around probably, but yeah, great gardens, but poor and one more person. If you follow Otso on social media, she posted videos all the time of her and her grandmother, who is adorable, and our grandmother gets down to business. So tell us about that experience, though.
What was that like going to school when you I mean, you had to learn the language when you got here, right, Yeah, and so it's kind of like immersion. What my bell is doing to you right now, it's part time emersion was doing too you Yeah, part time you know pretty much. Yeah, where you know, everyone's speaking that language, and that is really the quickest way to learn a language is uh, no forgiveness, you know what I mean, no room for you know, explaining what's going on. No, just this is
how I talked to you. Yeah, it was. It was tough because also like you're a kid and you want to really fit in, and I feel like yeah. And then I was also embarrassed about our circumstances. So I didn't invite friends back to my place because you know, even for birthdays or something. If it was my birthday, you know, I would just not have a party because I didn't want them being like, oh, you live here, you know what I mean. Yeah, And my mom and grandma,
they're just like elbow to elbow. A garage is it's a lot to hold three generations of people, you know what I mean, and our whole as personalities and baggage. It's not enough space for My mom has schizophrenia. And then I developed an eating disorder too, And I remember like thinking back, being like, God, a garage is not enough space for and eating disorder, and you need a lot of space. Well, you need privacy for an eating disorder,
you do. Yeah, And so we were just so on top of each other, and so I'm kind of you know, I joked that I'm sort of delayed and stunted as an adult because I feel like it wasn't until I got out of that situation that I was able to finally have like the confidence to be like, hey, you know, do you want to hang out? Do you want to be friends? So I'm kind of late in the game with socializing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I met Otsco at Largo, Yes, yeah, Largo? Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. I think that was the first
time we met, that's true. Yeah, yeah, because I was following her on social media and she's so funny. And she also did that drop down challenge where everybody, what's that song called again? Yeah? Beyonce's partition, give me something? Yeah, and then you dropped your ass down, which is basically the only dance move I can do, and I can't even really nail that one. It's so slow motion that
I thought maybe this is for me. That's what you're like, one of the most athletic people I know, well athletic, but I don't have rhythm. But it's like a squad. That's why I could do it. And then Odsco slid into my d MS asking if she could open me, open for me, open me. She wanted to open me, and I said, sure, open for me on a couple of stand up dates, and I was like, yeah, absolutely,
I love that you asked me. And then I met your husband, who's also just a sweetheart, and you just taped your HBO special which is going to come out
in December. I did, which you gave me so much advice about, and so I super appreciate it because I called you to be like, I had this opportunity to maybe do it all Broadway first, which would mean more dates running it, you know, maybe a hundred more times more than that before taping it, and you're like, you know, just tape it because and that's how I worked too, and so that was really great advice. And that's why it's coming out already. You know, that's exciting. Do you
know the date it's coming out yet? December tenth is exciting going for Yeah, December. T Your special comes out December ten. My special comes out December hers this on HBO minus on Netflix amazing, Yes, yeah, baby, December is a good time. People are at home, they want to watch stuff with family. Maybe they're sad. Yeah, I love that. Oh how nice? Is that? Awesome? And how did the taping go? Tell us the taping went? Well, it was
in New York. I kind of wish I did it in l A now, but everyone's always like, don't do it in l A. L A. People are jaded with cameras, so they're not gonna show it as much excitement, you know. But I'm an l A baby. I've been here since I was ten, and so it's just one thing I would for my next for your next special. Yeah, it's a good experience. Nonetheless, I mean for your next special, we'll take that in l A. Yeah. And so New
York was great, Brot. Grandma flew Grandma first you guys, I saw you posting her on for her in first class. Oh my gosh, she was. She she was like this lays down flat, you know. Oh. And I could just keep bugging the people for food and snacks. And I found Chelsea that when I was in first class because I had never flown first class too. I could not sleep because I was like, oh, I think I need to be a little uncomfortable to be able to sleep, because that's what I'm used to. Well, no, it's not sad,
but it's like I can see that being true. Yeah, where it's like, oh, like you know, I need too comfortable. I need to be sitting up straight and my neck cricket and I need to have a kink in my neck when I wake up. Truly be comfortable. It's so wild. Yeah, anyway, be totally exhausted, feeling awful. That's how you fall asleep on a plane. You don't ever win. It's what I'm saying. It's yeah, the grass is always greener, and then even when you get there, the grasses and stopped being green
and it turns yellow. Oh yeah, we got to Well, somebody urinated on it or had their period who didn't have an oblation in that order. Everybody, if you're having trouble following this conversation, you're not alone. Yeah, go back listen to what we just talked about. Catch yourself up and talk about how you met your husband. We met through a mutual friend, and you know, we had gosh,
like third day in we were at this patio. You know, it was a nice, nice day in l A. And there was somebody who was sort of talking to themselves and people at the restaurant were sort of afraid and didn't know what to do. And Ryan, my husband, knew how to handle the person and sort of calmed them down. And it kind of surprised me because I was like, wait, how do you know to do that? Because it was like signs of schizophrenia, which is one my mom has. So I recognized it and I was like, how do
you know how to deal with someone with that? And he's like, oh, my mom has it too, and so that was yeah. So it was kind of cool where I was like, well, I was already feeling you and liking you a lot, but this really like turn yeah a connection, yeah, a connection and the empathy. You know, everyone was scared to deal with this unhoused person who
was talking to themselves. But this guy that I was ready to funk, but I was like, yeah, well funck now you know right where he was like so kind to this person and knew how to calm them down, you know, So that's it's always surprising when men surprise us with just regular things that women would do, and we're like, that's so hot and so sexy. When men show empathy, Yeah, that's why. That's why there's waves of like women, I don't think we'll have the fandom of
like Kianu Reeves or you know, oh his Mystery. You know he's worked with mostly women directors, and that's supposed to be mind blowing, you know, like where I was like, oh my god, he is so hot God, and he's just you know, he just lives in hotels and you know, he works with mostly women directors and it's like you know what I mean, Like when women do that, it's like not as much of an allure I think. So it's not hot, it's more like, oh, they're starting a movement,
you know what. I'm going to Disney that after this actually psychotic. Actually, Katherine just came from Disney, you did. I just went this weekend. Oh my gosh. Yes, I got a Mickey tumbler. I bought all the Christmas merch. I haven't even told my husband about it yet. I got bowls with Christmas Mickey. I got a platter with Christmas Mickey. It was too much. It's too much. Katherine and I have nothing in common. No, I mean I
was gonna. I mentioned this because I was like, I mean, how does it feel to have too Disney adult friends great right next to you on election day? When our bodies are at stack? You guys are changing on a roller coaster. Because that's how I deal with chaos. You're gonna go to Disneyland. Have you done this before during a chaotic day? No? But this year it felt right. I was like, you know, if I find out what happens with the elections, I want to at least be
upside down on the roller coaster screaming. You know, I know, I don't even know if we're going to find out everything. Today people are like already filing lawsuits for things that haven't even happened yet. It's just like, oh, great, this could carry on for weeks. I hope not. I mean, I hope most of them get called. But yeah, I'm not that optimistic. I hope we have some surprises, but I just I'm so sick and tired of this nonsense. You know, for sure, Yeah for this you can always
move to Spain. Yeah I can I can move to Spain, or I can move to Canada. Yeah that's closer. But you're learning Spanish, you know, But I'm also learning Canadian. It's so cool. What have you learned? I'll talk to you about that later. Okay. All you have to learn in Canada has had to skim. Has never been skiing though, right, No, I'm not like a outdoors athletics person. Like the extreme sports. I don't I like to watch. Yeah, I got it. Do you like to watch it? Though? Like if my
friend is doing it, I'll stand there and watch. Okay, it's very horny energy, Like would you like to watch the Olympics when that happens? Oh? Not really? Yeah, yeah, I watched the I watched the performance. Oh the Spice girls are back together, you know that kind of thing. Yeah, well that's the super Bowl the Olympics. That Icce girls don't fucking perform, so they did one time in London a long time for the Olympics. Yeah, yes, I was at the Olympics that those Olympics. Yeah, I went to
the London Olympic competing. Yes, I actually was. I was doing the curl. It's called curling, but I call it the curl and it's men's I was competing with the men's team. So on this podcast, we give advice, life advice to people. So I just molested you. Um, we give life advice. We have real people calling, in writing, in calling Katherine, you can break down for us what we have in store for today. Yes, we actually have
a couple of really big questions. And you're so open about so much of the stuff that you've been through. I was able to pull some really great questions for you that are right in your wheelhouse. So oh great, even better, the stakes are high. Yeah, we can take a quick break and then we'll be right back for callers. Okay, we're gonna take a quick break and we're back. We're back, and we're back. We're back. So our first question comes
from Kalina. She's in Romania. I was just gonna say where the fund is Kalina from, because I have never heard that Lena Romania, Romania. Dear Chelsea, my name is Kalina. I'm a thirty year old girl from Romania. I really enjoy your podcast. It opens my mind while making me laugh. Great combo. I struggle with anxiety, with depression, sprinkles. I'm
also neurodivergent, which makes life even more interesting. I'm an only child and the only family I have close by are my parents, so all my life I relied on making strong connections with friends, which come easy. I'm currently going to therapy, but it's a long process. As you know, based on your experience as a human on this planet,
I would love your input. I tend to rely on other people to feel safe, to feel loved, and to feel worthy, which is funny because I really enjoy being alone, but I just need to know that there's someone there just in case. Because of this, I sacrifice my knees and self sabotage, sometimes spending time with people who don't treat me well because of that fear of being alone, even though I'm well aware that what people do is out of my control. My question is how do I
become enough for myself? How do I become secure enough to make decisions and be clear about what I want? How do I feel worthy? Thank you for sharing your joy, Kalina. Oh,
I'm sorry to hear that, Kalina. I think that one of the ways in which you can make yourself feel more full without relying on somebody to fill you up, because that's not really a great recipe, you know, Like I mean, you can get that from a spouse or a partner in the best, most ideal situation, but ideally for you even to find that person or best friend, you really have to be full on your own because
you kind of attract what you are. So if you are healthy and you are alone and you're happy doing that, which is an exercise, not everybody feels comfortable being alone. And there was a long period of time in my life where I was never alone. I always had a group of people around me. I always had lots of
you know, action, chaos. Even when I grew up, I was in a family of six kids, so there was always commotion and there was always action and I took that through my adulthood because I thought that's the way things were supposed to be. And it wasn't until I went to therapy where I learned how to be by myself and through therapy, and this is something that I learned even before therapy, is like what do you do when you are alone? What are the things and the
activities that fill you up? Like for me, it's reading books and watching TV and exercising, Like I love to do all of those three things, and I do that always alone. I don't like to exercise with other people. I obviously don't like to read books with other people because that doesn't make any sense. And I like watching
TV with people, but it's like my alone activities. So what I would say, on a very basic, fundamental level, is to pick three things that you really love to do, and then start doing that in your alone time by yourself, to just kind of recharge and regenerate your own relationship with yourself, because that's really all that is ever going to matter in your life. When you can depend on you, that is going to get you through every difficult time
and every happy time. And the more secure you become, the more secure that the people you attract in your life are going to be. What do you think, Wow, that was really you know, as a person who's never alone, I'm so opposite, you know, because I'm like, gosh, I'm just always with at least my husband. And so I will say I was working out to somebody, and I that is a time I do it myself. Besides, you know,
I like to work out by myself too. The workout teacher said, you know, she had gone through a divorce. I get very heavily invested in my fitness instructors. But she just went through divorce, and she was saying, you know, it was hard to get through the divorce and having to wake up alone because she hadn't been alone in a long time. But once he was gone, you know from her life, she was instead of waking up and loving someone else, she was forced to love herself. And
I was like, oh wow, that's so true. And so you know, it's just that switch of a mindset where it's like when people aren't around, take that as an opportunity to be like, oh, I can invest in me right now. What am I thinking? What am I my feelings? I love myself instead of being like what do you need right now? What do you need to know? What
do I need right now? And so I think it's just a switch of a mindset kind of like instead of I'm nervous to go on stage, it's I'm excited to go on stage kind of yes, or nerves me and I'm excited, you know. Or nerves are a good thing. That's what I remember someone telling me, Like, when you're nervous, it means you care. I'm like, Okay, Now, if I can think about it that way, this means I care,
which is much better than not caring at all. And I think one of the things that you said that stood out, Kalina, is it, Kalina, Yeah, am I saying that right? Okay? Great? Is that your friends are like sometimes you're not hanging around with the best people that you could choose to hang out with, and that's a telltale sign that you have work to do on yourself, because a healthy person just doesn't need that in their lives. So don't settle just for whoever you can hang out with.
Actually be discerning about the people you choose to hang out with, and I think that will yield a much better quality of person. Mm hmm. These questions are the big questions in life, like how do I make myself feel worthy and feel like I am enough by myself? And while those are huge questions that we can't necessarily answer on this show, I think those specific things are also where things like affirmations can come in. Just like
Osco said, our brains are very malleable. Just reframing what you're thinking, spending time with yourself telling yourself how great you are. You know, that you're smart, whatever your qualities that you love the most. Finding some affirmations that really feel good to you can help reframe just the thoughts come up in your brain on a routine basis. Yeah, you know, we mentioned Laura Lynn Jackson earlier, that famous Long Island medium. She's not the Long Island medium because
there's another Long Island medium. But anyway, Laura Lynn Jackson, who's a good friend of mine, I go, I just want to be positive towards everybody, even the people that I don't like. I want to have good vibes. I want to throw good vibes at them. I want them to succeed. I don't want to wish for anyone to
have bad luck or bad fortune or whatever. And she gave me this exercise where you get up every morning and you write, you know, for one minute, the first thing before you do anything, before you even brush your teeth, you write down for one minute, just everything you're grateful for. And there is scientific data that proves that after twenty one days, you're changing your energetic field, which is the
field of energy that you give off. And so I already shared that with like two of my girlfriends because my girlfriend said to me. Three days later, she said the same thing to me. She goes, I am so fucking mad at this woman. I'm so pissed. I hate her. And I'm like, you don't hate her, don't even put your energy towards that. And I gave her the exercise that I have been doing. It's been like nine or ten days since I've been doing it, and it's so easy to wake up and just write all down, the
write down all the things that you're grateful for. It could be your dogs, it could be your bed, it could be your job, it could be the weather, it could be someone you know, your mother's health, all of those things, and you can change your vibe. And I think by having a higher vibration, which is a definite scientific thing. It's not woo woo talk, it's true, like are you a positive or you a negative? Everyone knows a negative. And I'm sure I'm not saying that you
are clean up. But I think that would be a great exercise for you to do. You do it for twenty one days and you will feel it immediately. I promise you. I love that. Well. Our next color is Ryan and um just as what I do, my wife has always going to Disneyland. I hope not, because this one's about a breakup. So, okay, can you imagine if he broke up with you? On my podcast, God talk about a gratitude. So he's twenty three years old, he says,
Dear Chelsea, he's gay, Right, he's gay. He is gay. Indeed, we don't have straight man call in, got it? We have a block. Maybe that's why he's leaving you. I'm currently in a long term relationship and desperate to get out. My boyfriend and I have been together for four years, and last year I decided it was time to move in together. I had just graduated college and he was planning on transferring to a school in the big city. Things were going great for a while. I landed my
dream job and love life in the city. The issue is, I've realized we're each in very different places in our lives, and I don't know that we're still compatible As a result. My entire life, I've been told that I was very mature for my age, and I could feel this was true for myself. I feel that I'm at a threshold of an exciting new chapter in life. The transition into adulthood is when I've waited my entire life for and for the first time ever, I feel as if I
have all my ducks in a row. My boyfriend, however, seems to be feeling the opposite. As twenty something in college, he exhibits all of the behavior as one would expect, and I don't blame him for any of this. I want him to do all the fun things that you're supposed to do at that time, but I can't help but feel as though we're holding each other back. I've essentially made up my mind about leaving him, but there are two major issues. The first is that he is
completely financially dependent on me. When we moved to the city, I was the one with the big boy job, so it was clear that I would be the one paying for our new lives. He lives with me here and if we were to break up, he wouldn't have anywhere to go. The other issue is that I know he's still head over heels in love with me, and if I were to end things, I know it would destroy him, and I don't know that I have the heart to
do it. I have so much love and respect for him, but just feel that we're operating in different phases of life. In the recent episodes of the podcast, I've listened to you talk so much about showing up for yourself, and I think in order to show up for myself, I need to exit this relationship. I just don't know how. Thanks for your help. Ryan, Hi, Ryan, Hi, Hi Hi. This is our special guest Otsco. Nice to meet you. Wow,
just like so heartfelt and honest, honest words. I'm glad you're so self aware to note that you need to exit though. Thank you. Yeah. In the Chelsea's episode with Ross Matthews, she said it's undignified to pretend that things are okay when they're not. And I've never heard somebody phrase it like that, and it is so undignified. And I don't consider myself an undignified person, which has brought me to this decision. The thing is, I made the decision,
and now I just don't know how to execute it. Okay, So how long have you guys lived together? Only a couple of months? About six months? Okay, Well that's great news because it hasn't been like, you know, years, So that's to unravel the relationship. I know you've been dating for longer than six months, but you've been living together
for six months, right, correct? And does he work? Yes, he does, and he pays a fraction of the rent, but, as I said in the letter, is completely financially dependent on me. Okay, well, that's also not your problem, you know what I mean. You can unravel this relationship in a nice, dignified way by just setting up a boundary like, Okay, listen, I know this is hard. I mean, obviously you're gonna have to break up with him, you know that already.
So however you want to manage that. The financial aspect and the codependent aspect is something that you can just show grace in. You know, you can say, hey, I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna give you three more months. Why don't you start saving your money so you don't have to pay me rent? I want to you know you're gonna live alone anyway, right, you can afford to pay your rent for yourself, correct, Right, and give him three months or whatever time frame feels right to you.
Don't let it go though, six more months. That's really unhealthy. Yeah. That one other caveat that I forgot to mention in the letter is he's about to go on this giant vacation for the holidays to Germany, And I don't know if I should do it before that and potentially ruin his big trip, or wait until after er and just prolong this pretending that's tricky, that is hard. I I my instinct would say to wait until he gets back. I don't know what do you girls think about that?
How long is he in Germany for? He's gonna go for a couple of weeks. He'll leave around the nineteenth of December, and he'll get back around New Year's Okay, so that's still like about five six weeks away before he leaves. I think if you have a month before he goes, If you have that much time before he goes, I think you should because that could be an opportunity for him to actually grow a little bit and be out and about in the world, knowing that his relationship
isn't there when he gets back. It's not him going on the assumption that he's coming back to you. If you have that amount of time, I would say, definitely do it before. Do it as soon as possible, and you know that you want to do this before he goes on that trip, so you know he's going to have some time to think about things, and you definitely don't want to ruin anything, but you just can't be this dishonest with each other at this point. You're being
sawnest with yourself and him. Yeah, yeah, agreed. I think you can't do it like the week before he leaves, like do it, do it this week, so he's got a month to adjust and then I'll have a few weeks where you can go like have fun. But you also don't have to be playing the game of like miss you sweetie on the phone and you know that sort of thing. Yeah, And has he left the country like this before on a trip like this? No? Not really. Yeah, So I think giving him the space to acclimate to
the idea before he goes away. I think major things happen when people go on their first trips overseas, you know what I mean. It's a major wake up call and it's a major growth spurt. So I think the timing, if you can do it sooner than later, give him some you know, room to like, you know, you don't want him to cancel the trip, obviously, and if you did it right before, there's a chance he could do that.
But you want to give him some space to think about it, and some space when he's away from you, when there's distance ince time, that's the best time to contemplate and reflect on things. And by the time he comes back, you know what I mean, you're almost kind of like if you say, from now, I'll get of you two months or three months, don't pay rent to me anymore. I want you to start saving your money. I'm going to pay the rent whatever is comfortable for
you financially. Obviously, don't bend over backwards because he's not your responsibility. You can be generous, but you don't have to be his you know, sugar Daddy, that's just not necessary for anyone when you're breaking up. That's just the way it goes. And just remember people break up all the time, like people get heartbroken a lot. It's you're not the first person to break his heart. And I know that would be difficult for you, But what will
be more difficult is living like a lie. Yeah, I agree, and I think you're definitely right. I think that giving him some time to go on this trip and heal himself,
I think is the better is the better option. And like I talked to my best friend about this, and she had said that I had like involuntarily taken on this sort of caretaker role, not even in the There is the financial aspect, but there's also, like I said, the biggest thing for me is the emotional aspect that I just wasn't really prepared for before all of this. So I think you're definitely right, and I think I need to do it sooner around than later. And these
are also really honest conversations that you can have. While they may seem challenging, you're going to give him tools for his movement forward by being honest with him that it's too much for it's too much of an emotional burden for you, and and that you know you didn't expect this, and and and your feelings have changed so that when he goes into his next relationship, he has a different dynamic instead of him repeating the same patterns.
You know, he may do that anyway, but at least if you're truthful with somebody as hurtful as it, maybe there's always a softer way to say everything. And if you're truthful with somebody, then they can really take that information and do something different in their next relationship. Yeah, I totally agree. Do you think there's a way to offer that, like financial support for a moment of like you can live here for a couple more months, you can, I'll pay you don't have to pay me rent. That
doesn't come off as condescending. It sounds like you have a lot of respect and love for this person, but it's it is not working out anymore. So I would just say, you know, I want to be there for you as this transition happens, and you know we'll continue to have the situation where I'm paying for the rent for the next however much time. You think that he needs to get on his feet, but like, let's aim for this date for you to be finding somewhere else
to be. And I don't think you offering to pay the rent is condescending, you know, like it's not like you I mean, only if you said in a really condescending way. The act of it is very generous and it's sweet, and you love him, you know as a person, you're just not in love with him anymore, and it's not an arguable thing. You know, giving him plenty of time before his trip is generous, giving him plenty of leeway, and when he moves out is also generous. Then you
can feel good about this down the road. I mean he's going to have a whole roller coaster of emotions about this, definitely. Yeah, I agree. That was my biggest fear coming into this is that you guys would say, you know, you just have to do it. But I think you know when that's I think you just know that that that's what's right. If that's what's you know, okay, I'll be the devil's advocate. You how can you stay
with him? No, it's the loving thing I think to to leave before it turns into resentment and then it's gonna be worse for eat both of you. Yeah, absolutely, I agree. And there's also a dynamic that can start when someone doesn't leave when they know they're ready to leave, which is that you're wasting his time to go and find out what's next for him, Meet somebody else, make out with a German on his trip, you know, whatever,
whatever it might be. Don't say that to him. Don't tell him to make out with a German on his trip. Nobody likes that when they're being broken up with, go find somebody in Germany. Totally let it be his idea. Yeah, I completely agree, and just act with dignity like that sentence struck you remember that, be dignified, you know, to be dignified with your generosity, Be dignified with your attention that he needs while you're breaking up. But don't sell yourself.
Don't say Okay, fine, I'll stay in the relationship because you're so upset. Being dignified means like you have to give people bad news. Absolutely, and that's why I mean that was part of my decision to write into this podcast. I think you being so candid about all of this has helped me be a more candid and honest person. And the candid, honest person that listens to Dear Chelsea would be honest in this relationship, say that it's time for things to end, and doing it, like you said,
in a dignified way. Yeah, definitely. So you put on that seatbelt, turn that car on, and go straight to talk to him right now now. I'm just kidding, honestly, might just do that? Okay, Well, great, keep us posted. Will you like check in with us in a few weeks and let us know what happened. I will thank you, Okay, thanks so much? Ryan, call us back when ots goes not here. Okay, I'm bad at this. I'm bad at this.
You are good, though you. There's so much love for him there and you could see it, and that's why this is the decision you're making. Thank you. I appreciate that guy. Thanks for your help. Okay, bye Ryan, Ryan, Bye, bye, am I fired. Can you imagine if that was Ryan wearing a disguise and he was really talking about you, can you imagine that's a that's our round four, that's our suv reason right now. He shows up to the studio, He's like, hey, so I bought you to have ticket
to go to Germany. He's like, I know that one if you knew this, but you're going to Germany. Look there's a lot of men out there in Germany. You can make out with the German. Catherine said, so well. Our next collar is Anna. The subject line is Shame, Regret and dental bills. Dear Chelsea, I'm a thirty four year old woman who's fought hard for the life I lived today. As a young teen, living in a trauma filled household, I developed an eating disorder that followed me
through many eras of my life. At one point in my twenty is I was hospitalized multiple times for major dehydration and electrolyte imbalance due to bolimia. After a final near death experience, I finally decided that recovery was my only option. Since then, a lot has happened, a divorce, graduate school, major career changes, lots of self discovery. Now I'm healthy, happy, and proud of the person I am today.
I have a job that allows me to be creative while helping others, a wonderful partner of four years, a dog i'm obsessed with, and a life of adventures big and small. For the last several years, I've worked primarily low paying jobs in education and the nonprofit space. While I don't make much, I've worked hard to save a humble amount of money, and I'm in a better place
than ever financially. My new job has afforded me with dental insurance, and this summer I went to a dentist for the first time in a couple of years, since I didn't have dental insurance prior to that. But because of my years of bolimia, my teeth are very damaged. After a thorough exam with my new dentist, I learned that dental work I had done years ago needed to be replaced a SAP to avoid losing multiple teeth. The total cost of the essential procedures is well over ten
thousand dollars. There are also additional things that would be really good for me to have done to avoid problems down the line, but those total and additional eighteen thousand dollars. My dental insurance will only pay for a thousand dollars worth of work annually, so the rest of that tab is on me. When my dentist went over this information with me, I couldn't help but crumble into tears. The overwhelm,
the shame, and hopelessness took over. My dentist was lovely and kind and explained how we could break the treatment into chunks to lessen the financial blow. Still, I currently work for a nonprofit making forty dollars a year, and I have two side hustles that pull in about five thousand dollars a year. I have student debts, rent a car payment, and I still managed to put a little into savings every month, but it would take me years
to pay this off. I've looked into personal medical dental loans, but the interest rates on those are astronomical, so that option is off the table. I've booked the first set of procedures with my dentist totally, and I'll be using that savings money to pay for that. But I know I need a plan for how to get the rest
of the care I need. Moreover, this experience has thrust me into a familiar spiral of shame, self disgust, and sadness, similar to what I dealt with early in my recovery from trying to heal from health issues resulting from my eating disorder. I worked so hard to overcome those issues while also trying to heal from the trauma that caused
by eating disorder. I know that I need to think creatively, ask for help, maybe start a Go fund me campaign, but the shame and feelings of self disgusted have me frozen in that regard. How can I find a creative solution to this problem, which at its heart is just a financial issue, but feels so much bigger than that. How can I view myself with kindness despite the shame and regret I feel overharming myself so many years ago. I know your ingenuity and positivity can illuminate resolutions I
may not be able to see right now. Thank you, Anna, Hianna, Yanna. Hi, how are y'all? This is Otsko Okotska. Hi, nice to meet. She's our special guest. She's a very funny comedian who also had an eating disorder at one point. I've also had an eating disorder at one point, so I mean most women have, Katherine, did you ever have an eating disorder? Oh? Yeah, I mean eating disorders take a lot of different forms, but basically, as soon as I learned about calories growing up,
I immediately developed an eating disorder. So yeah, so sorry that you feel such shame. I mean that's the first thing that you have to flip around. You know, you're healed now, you're better, and like that's something that's very positive. And to like sit there and and rate yourself and self immolate about something that's in the past is pointless. That's just pointless. So you can either start by like
writing down daily affirmations for yourself. Meditation I think is a good way to start putting some more positivity back into you from you. The financial aspect of this, I'm really not worried about this. You can do is segmented, like you're gonna do your first treatment. Yeah, you could start a go fund me or you could get do you have time to get a waitressing job for a short period of time that you work like two shifts
a week? Is that a possibility? I have three part time side hustles right now, So I'm definitely doing doing that kind of a thing. The financial aspect of it is obviously kind of the simpler thing in a lot of ways, right that it is just money. There's a little bit of a time crunch with a couple of the procedures because they are like, we need to do this yesterday, we need to do this last year. Basically I did just get the first set of things done. Actually had a crown put on for one of the
procedures like two hours ago, so I just left. It's a little while ago, right, and so you know, the plan is of right now is to do it in segments. Like you were saying, the shame thing is something that I've had times where I'm like, I feel good, I
feel confident in the person I am. I feel like the people who love me understand my story and accept me, and then things like this will happen where you're like, oh my gosh, I'm such a funk up, like nobody get nobody's gonna get this, everyone's gonna judge me, and then and then it's just such a process to dig out from that, for sure. Yeah, but a real funk
up would never be we're sitting where you are. That's not a funk up by the nature very nature of you addressing the issue and having recovered from your eating disorder. You've recovered from your eating disorder. So you're not a funk up. You're not. You're the opposite. You're somebody who's
going and handling a situation. Do you know how many people would never want to deal with the truth of what they have to do and get the work done because they don't want to they're so scared of the cost, or they're scared of what the doctor's gonna or the dentist is gonna tell them. You've been brave. You are brave, and you're recovered. You are on your way. This is all positive and you're there's no reason to make it negative.
So you need to have like some deep conversations with yourself, and you need to start meditating, and you need to start writing daily affirmations down every single morning. When you wake up going, I am brave, I am strong, I am handling my life independently. All of these amazing things that you're doing all by yourself, you have three side hustles going. That's fucking badass too. Yeah, it's it's so positive to be wanting to take care of something. You know.
My husband just had ten dental procedures done because he was always afraid of it. He grew up with very little money and he was just always insecure about his teeth. And he was also ashamed that, like, oh god, I have so many cavities and these root canals that I never got to How could I get it to this point? You know? But it's the positive of like, no, okay, now I'm going to find a pathway forward to fixing it. Some of them were emergency, like we gotta do it today,
and then the financials we figured out. But the shame of it is like all of us are really just trying our best, you know, like my mom, to be honest, just to go out there with it. My mom hasn't showered in twenty years because of mental health issues, and she has O c D. She's scared of soap and stuff, so talk to people who are supportive about it, because you know, when I talk to my mom, I'm never shaming her. It's not coming from a place of like reprimanding,
how could you let this come this far? Whatever? Because her to nails are really long, there's infections and stuff, But it's really just about being like so proud, like so being so proud that you were like, I'm gonna start handling it, you know, because that's really a big first step. Honestly, it is a big first step. And you know what, you should find a support group online, like for people who are recovering. That's going to be free. There's tons of support groups for people who have eating
disorders and are recovering from that. And I guarantee you're gonna find so many people that are in the same position that are going to help build you up and may also have ideas of how you can actually afford all of these treatments. You know, you're not the only person that this is happening to, so remember that you're
not alone. And I think that would actually be really helpful to you because your shame spiral is just because you don't have anybody else who's going through the same thing sitting around you going, oh god, I did that. I did that, you know, and and that would be a good up for you to take as well. I think you're gonna be fine with paying this off in a slower way. I think that's totally reasonable, and you're
gonna feel so empowered as soon as you start. I'm sure you already feel a little bit of that after going to the dentist, you know, getting your first crown put on. Yeah, the dentist that I've been seeing too is just so caring and thorough that I also just feel really happy and confident that I'm making the right investment. It's not kind of going to be another thing that's an issue in a few years, so so that helps also.
But yeah, you guys are helping me kind of see too that I think that I have focused on the financial aspect of it, and that's really just been a little bit of a cover for this deeper feeling of overwhelm and shame. I years ago I had tried to kind of do the support group thing and just never invested in it. But one thing I do know about myself, which is probably evident from having all these side hustles and things like that, is that if I set an
intention to really do something, I will do it. That's why I'm in recovery. And so, yeah, you took the step to recover from this, you're capable of everything that comes after. That was the hardest part. And I think what you're doing now seeing that as an extension of the self care that you've already done. You have taken the steps to you know, go to therapy, go to recovery, get yourself to the point where you no longer are
in an active state of self harm. You're in a state of healing, and this is just the next step in your healing journey. But the other thing that I loved in your in your email was about asking for help. Anybody who hears this story is not going to feel like, man, she did that to herself. That's not what's going through anybody's mind. And so you know, you never know who in your life, and maybe you won't know it might
be anonymous. If you do set up a go fund me, you don't know who is going to step up and you know, donate to the cause or help you out with that. But the first step there is is not being alone in this and not keeping it hidden, which is probably the scariest part. Right. Yeah. I really only talked to my two very closest friends who also have an eating disorder history, and my partner in detail about this,
and there have all been so wonderful and supportive. But yeah, I feel like maybe talking more openly to trusted people would would be healing in its own way. You live in the States, right, yeah. Yeah, for a system that works so hard to keep us down, you're crushing it. Like for a system where every American girl, the system is made so that we're all supposed to get eating disorders.
I think that average Americans supposed to get a stroke at a heart, heart disease, maybe diabetes to these are things we're actually supposed to have get as America's you're crushing it. May an animals all messed up from the throwing up that I used to do too, and like and so when you set up something like you know, I'll go fund me. Other Americans will understand because it's a system that keeps us down, and so we you know, if anyone will understand, it's fellow people who have gone
through it, you know. And yeah, yeah, and I would think I would also offer up to say, like, stop treating it as some big dark secret. You know, have a little levity about it. We all have had eating every four out of four of the women that are talking right now have had an eating disorder. Like it's it's better to be like, oh god, yeah I was. I was just you know, a product of my culture.
I was a product of society. Now I've taken my own life into my own hands and I'm driving the wheel and stead of letting somebody else drive the wheel for me, that's empowering. That is powerful. You're a powerful I can tell that by looking at you. You know, your teeth are just a reminder and you're never going to go back there. And now you are fixing the situation.
And it might take a little bit longer than you would ideally like, but the actual pivot points, like if you're looking at a graph or a chart of where you are in your life, you're headed in the absolute
right direction. Yeah, thank you well, And I think that it's it's interesting like I'm thirty four, I'll be thirty five and a couple of months, and when I was like seven was kind of when I was really newly in recovery, and I really embraced being very open about it and talking to it, almost to the point that it was like my whole identity, which is healing in its own way, like and I did connect with a lot of people, but I also felt like, probably around thirty,
I was like, Okay, I need to do some investing in like I don't want to just be like the
recovered girl. I wanted to invest in the woman version of myself and that identity, and I have been doing that, and now I do need to do a little bit of this reconciliation in some way of Okay, you're a woman who's grown in all these different ways, and you're still a person in recovery, and there's still stuff that's going to come up, and some of it might be health problems, and so it's kind of this reintegration again,
which will continue through through all of life. Absolutely. And here's the thing that I can totally relate to about what you said. I went to therapy and I made so many over corrections, Like I became so self aware that I was like, Okay, maybe you shouldn't talk at all, because you talk too much, you insert yourself too much,
you have too many opinions. You're too you tell everybody too much of the truth, and I overcorrected, And there is a period of overcorrection that we do when we're recovering from something, and then we have to kind of balance it out and integrate what we've learned with the new person that we've become. So it's like, that's totally normal what you're describing. Also, like, yeah, that was became
kind of your identity. Therapy became my identity for a period of time, you know, And now I get to talk to all these people that call in and help them. So that's also something that would really help you helping other people that have survived eating disorders and are in recovery. Instead of looking at it like you're getting the counseling, I think you get a lot of counseling out of
counseling others. Yeah. Yeah, And another resource we've talked about quite a bit on this show that maybe a possibility for you as Pandemic of Love. They help people out with different situations that they run into, and they pair donors with somebody who has a financial issue in order to help get that solved. So I would say definitely reach out to them see if they can help with some of the financials. Yeah, thank you, but you're gonna be fine. Everything's going to be great. I appreciate you
all so much this. You really have helped me kind of see things from a different perspective. And it's simple and complicated, but that's kind of everything, right Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah. So proud of you taking the steps. Thank you. Yeah, all right, well follow up with us. Let let us know how everything goes, okay, Anna, absolutely, Yeah, thank you guys so much. Chelsea. I love you. This is so exciting. I've been breathing this whole time to be calm, but
you're incredible. I'm excited for you. Thanks, take care, Chelsea. I did have one idea, so you know, I know Anna has talked about setting up a go fund me. What if we could have listeners of the show head over to her go fund me. I mean, we can put the name in right here and have people head over and help with some of those even if they have five bucks. Yeah. I think that's a great idea.
Anyone who wants to help somebody who's recovering from an eating disorder, anyone who heard this and who wants to help another person. Yeah, I think that's a great idea, Katherine. Okay, great. If you'd like to donate to Anna's go fund me, take a look at the episode description, it'll be right there in the show notes. Good thinking. Well, let's head to a quick break and we'll be right back to
wrap up with Osco and Chelsea. And we're back. Hi hi, hi. Oh. That was so deep and I learned so much and yeah, I got so emotional, and wow, what a day. That was uplifting. Even though those were sad things to be talking about, they're all uplifting because it's like seeing somebody
on the other side of something is really empowering. And I'm sure there are plenty of people that are listening to this who are experiencing disorders at eating disorders at this moment, and plenty of people that are on the other side of eating disorders. So feel free to right in or call in about any of this stuff, you guys, Because everybody just needs somebody to just kind of be
there for them, and we understand that. And there's something about hearing someone else's story, you know, while that's not exactly my story, I found it so moving and it's exciting to hear about her healing journey and it's tough. There's there's tough steps in the middle of that. Yeah, I was hoping that you know, one of you, you're more well traveled than I am, would know something about like Mexico. But I don't want to be like because maybe you could get dental work in Mexico, don't people,
I don't think that's a good idea. Okay, dental work in Mexico. This is how I would do it. But I still have my tag on on my shirt. And my housekeeper went to Mexico for dental work and it was a ship show. Her teeth were not that every dentist in Mexico is bad, but wherever she was going, I was just too quick. We had to redirect her to U. Yeah, our doctor here. But yeah, so I wouldn't recommend that. I thought, if you could get dental work done in the United States, that's a used to
do it good. We're good for something and it's good done to work. See even though it's cash. Wasn't it so good that I didn't bring it up? Though? Yeah, I just I want a little prop here for not not being like Mexico. To you hold your tongue because that's totally yeah. I thought about it. Well, Otsco, did you have any advice that you'd like to ask from Chelsea?
Oh gosh, I feel like again like I feel like you've already given me so much with you know, even figuring out the title to my special, which is called The Intruder. It's called the Intruder because there was another option, and she was like, intruder, go with your gut instinct. And that's such a great piece of advice. Intruder, which airs December ten on HBO. You guys, you're gonna fucking love this woman. She's so funny. You are going to
love this special. I cannot wait to see it. Thank you, Chelsea, and December go check out Yo Girl, Chelsea h Okotska on Netflix on Netflix. That's right double duty. Jesse's like, how benevolent can I be to the one person? Over and over? She almost sent a person to Mexico and we're gonna go. We should give Mike Berbiglia show a shout out because we're about to go see that together. She and I are going to go see that in New York together, and I'm going to come to your
show on Tuesday. What's the name The Old Man, The Old Man and the Pool. The Old Man and the Pool is Mike Berbiglia show which had just launched on Broadway and it's getting rave reviews, and if you get a chance to see it, you should definitely go. And we're gonna be there and Chelsea will probably have better seas than I will, but we will both see the
same show. Fabulous. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Always check out Osco's new special The Intruder on HBO, And if you'd like to donate to Anna's dental work, take a look at the episode description. A link to her go fund me will be right are in the show notes. So I'm winding up my stand up tour. Vaccinated and Horning is coming to a screeching halt at the end of the year. I have my last dates and these are the last opportunities. You have to also buy merch
from the website Chelsea Handler dot com. If you want Vaccinating and Horning Captain's hats, let's say We're the Captain's now for women only. Our t shirts for men and your family that say I'm sorry because they should be. I only have a few dates left Baltimore, Maryland, and then my very last date is December sixte in Reading, Pennsylvania. If you are enjoying what you're hearing, you can subscribe to Dear Chelsea. That is our podcast, and you can
rate us if you want. Yeah, that's a great idea. It actually makes a huge difference for this podcast, for any podcast that you like, Subscribing giving it a rating actually make a huge difference. And who all we get served to and helping spread the word. It's okay, Yeah, subscribe and and and and comment, yeah, and follow. So if you like advice from Chelsea, just send us an
email at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com. Dear Chelsea is a production of I Heart Radio, executive produced by Nick Stuff, produced by Catherine Law, and edited and engineered by Brad Dickart.