In Conclusion

I think it's very serendipitous that this is the week that Nancy Pelosi has also decided to go ahead and impeach the president yciting things. Yeah, to start an impeachment inquiry. Would you like to explain to people who are listening who may not know what the impeachment inquiry is, because last night I had to Marco Polio to get some

insiders to what was really going on. Well, it means that they're going to investigate whether or not to impeach him, was my understanding is, and then the trial itself is the actual impeachment. So whether or not he's found guilty, at the end of his impeachment, he will have been impeached if they choose to go to trial, if they choose to hold an impeachment hearing, what I think. But I could also be wrong, but I think I'm right, But yeah, that doesn't matter anyway. I'm very excited about

your participation in the podcast. I think that you probably had no idea you'd be podcasting so fervently. Yeah. People ask all the time if this was a planned thing, and I said, you were literally out the door to go interview Mary and said Brandon, come along, And I thought I was just coming along for the ride, not to actually be on the podcast. And lo and behold, right, twenty episodes later, people think you're You're a huge hit.

People love you. They want to know what your Instagram handle is, and I tell them, but I don't really respond to those kinds of questions. But I think you can announce that you don't have one, because not have any social media. Brandon and I are actually eating Wendy's as we do this conclusion exit interview, because Wendy's was on the way here and we got the spicy nut

will Powder, Well, I have no will powder powder. And Brandon is from North Dakota, right south Dakota, right, like I said, one of the Dakotas, and so he eats this kind of ship all day long and then goes to his spin classes for four hours a day. Yeah, that's true. It's spend a lot of time with I'll chew off, I'll chew off Mike. Um. Yes, we got one owner of spicy chicken nuggets, one order of regular chicken nuggets mine or the regular. I don't even need

sauce with them. They're so fucking delicious. You're really good. And we got an order of fries, which neither one of us love their new fries, but it'll do. I grew up with Wendy's, and I would like to say that chicken McNuggets from McDonald's I find repulsive, but chicken nuggets from Wendy's I find a plus plus because you don't get the weird tendons. God, it's like when you get those frozen ones where they say with ribbed meat in that small font or print, you like, excuse me

why the fund is rib meat involved in that. What's interesting is a lot of places use the small print for things they don't want you to know. But if you eat a bag of pork crimes on the bag in big font, it will say it may cause anal leakage. I don't know if you remember that controversy pork crimes cause an a leakage. I think so there was like a chip, a snack of sorts that came out that would cause any leakage, and they didn't hide that from you. They told you in big And what does it have

like methanism? I don't make pork rinds. I'm not sure the science behind it, but this was a thing. So I've never eaten pork rins. It's not my thing. I mean, maybe I've had some real pork skin at some point, but pork ron's has never been my go to. You know, it sounds so gross, pork rime. I know people on Keto diets love a pork rind because people on Keto diets also like to have an a leakage, I guess. So bringing it back to hip for the last episode,

but that's all I ever talked about is feculence. Feculence and ship. Why don't we talk about our journey, Brandon, our journey together. In the past three years, you've been witnessed to all of my changes and all of my self discovery and self awareness, which has prompted you to do some self discovery. How's your meditation going. It's good. I've been doing it regularly, not every day, but maybe every other day, just getting in a better routine. Yeah,

the last couple of days. I had a wedding in Tiles, New Mexico this weekend, and my friend tried to kill me with alcohol. So I have been recovering for like two days. I felt nauseous for the last forty eight hours because you don't drink anymore, I know, So it's a real I do drink, but this is a real conundrum for me because I can't afford to be that hungover. I mean, I guess I can, but I don't want

to be that hungover. So it's like, if you drink all the time, you don't get a hangover, which is better, but then you're just inveterately bloated. And if you cut back on your drinking and you only drink once in a while, then you really really feel it. So I'm at a crossroads. I think you just have to lean into the cannabis and you have to like let the

drinking go. If you know you're getting to that point, No, if you know you're getting that point, you're like, this is gonna be a rough couple of days, you rein it in just pop another edible. I packed enough Now, I took a lot of edibles and I drank a lot of alcohol, like I did both, and so you double down and that's why you're feeling like ship. Yeah, I did, I think sometimes so you know, with the cannabis, you don't want to be too high because then you're

just like out on cloud nine. My friend Mary told me, she goes, you know, sometimes the cannabis is cute and everything, but sometimes you're just like not even communicative while you're sitting there. So that I love about it. So that's too much unless you're alone, Like when I go home at night in bed and I like last night, I took twenty milligrams and I was like, here, just wait till you fall asleep. Sister, do you remember when we were in Sun Valley, we watched the entire series of

that show. We'd get in bed on and edible every night and we'd have to rewatch and rewatch and we didn't say a word to each other because we didn't remember what show was it. I can't remember the name of it. See that's what's great about television. Watch you can keep rewatching shows you thought you've already watched. Okay, So in terms of health and self awareness, I want

to just talk about a couple of things. People seem to be very responsive to me sharing all of my therapy stuff, So I want to talk about reaction versus response, because that was my major issue when I went in, was my lack of patience and my reactivity. I didn't think before I responded, And what Dan taught me was there's a space of awareness between those two things. You know, I talked about this last week a little bit with

Laura Lynn Jackson. But there's a reaction and then there's a consideration for your reaction because sometimes we react with our bodies before our minds, and we have a physical feeling towards something, and there's a space of awareness is where you can identify that and then respond instead of react. And that's something that people have mentioned to me has

helped them a lot. So it's really easy to incorporate that into your life if you've tried it, and then eventually it just becomes you know, your habit and you can kind of rehabituate your bad habits. And that goes back to Dan's and your creation of I'm I am, I am identification awareness modification. So like if somebody says something to you two that is annoying or that you find annoying, or somebody is annoying, it's about, oh wait, why am I reacting this way? Why do I not

like this person? Is it really because of that person or is it because of something that that person is doing that reminds me of myself? Which usually if somebody is annoying you, it's because you see something in yourself

in them that you do not like. You know, what I found interesting lately is your vocalization of how you're feeling because before so when you started therapy, I could see you making the adjustments even if you weren't saying anything, like you taking a second before you respond to a dumb question that I'm asking, or we have a lot of people around the house that meander through for different reasons.

Brandon loves it because he gets a kickback. Brandon gets a lot of kickbacks on any improvements that I have on the house. Oh that's why I have seventeen remote controls, because I believe he gets ten percent of each remote control.

And every time there's a new TV installed, or there's always audio visual amount of money is worth the trouble all those fucking remote cause so I can tell you what sister outdoor patio furniture gets stained and odd colors, and then we have to hire outside companies to restain it. I mean, ever since he's worked here, things are a hot mass at my house. I mean the money is going out, out, out, out out, and it's not coming in,

is it. I have to say, for the record, I am very frugal and very thoughtful about how and where I spend your money. Look at the house of Spain. Look at the house in Spain. We leave it to anyone else, and then there's all these problems. People say, oh you know, they go there and they said this wasn't right and this wasn't right. And now Brandon has to go for two weeks to vacation in Spain. At my house. They're just to set everything right. Isn't that right? Brandon?

There is some truth? Are you bringing? Are you bringing your lover with you to Spain? You know I wasn't going to be able to be he his going what's coinky dink? That's so funny. That's such a surprise and is my Bell going to Spain Nobell? Not? Do you and my Bell have a rivalry? No, I think we're I think we're on the up and up. You're in good shape with each other. She doesn't listen to this podcast, so you can talk about her if you want. Know.

Everything with me and Bell is fine. She doesn't like feedback. Mabel. Mabel is the head han show at the house. To be completely honest, like I should really be taking direction from She's been there forever she deserves. She was with me when I broke up with Ted and I moved into my own apartment and she was the first woman I saw. I moved into some apartment and she was in house cleaning lady and I walked in and this was like ten years ago or probably longer, and she

was like, Oh, my husband is terrible. He doesn't have a car. And I was like, fuck, here we go. I'm gonna have to buy this woman a car. And then that's exactly what happened, and now we're still My father was used car de Lebrandon. Okay, I'm just trying to keep the business in the family. I understand it. Yeah, so you've noticed that. Now I'm saying I don't. Okay.

So the other day you and this has happened more than once, but the most recent you had said that you were feeling ornery, and and even though you were saying it in jest, you've done that now where you're like, I'm not in a good mood, or you'll tell me before you say something that I might take personally. Perhaps,

how does that come across? I think that's much healthier that you're acknowledging that you're like, I'm in a bad mood right now, just letting you know, because like I've had to say to you, like I'm I feel wound very tight today. And even though sometimes I feel like that's not professional, I think it because some of the job crosses over between personal and professional. Telling you this morning, what part of the job do you think crosses over

from professional to personal? You prying on my naked body in the morning when I'm in my broad underwear, or when I'm coming out of the shower and you're in the bathroom. Yeah, I mean those are a couple of examples reverse sexual harassment. Just so you know, I guess you're right, and I could press charges if I knew

who to talk to. Take into consideration. I mean, seriously, you're sexually harassing me if I get out of the shower and my beaver and my boobies are exposed and you're just, you know, lollygagging around on my night covers. I always do seem to cross your path right when you are exposing yourself, right as I'm walking out of the shower into my bathroom or into my closet to get dressed. I guess who pops up. Let's talk about my relationship with Burton Bernice, because I think that one

has improved the most since my therapy. I'm really interested in all the relationships and how they've because I would say that I have less people in my life now socially then I did for a long time, Like I've not thinned the herd, because that sounds like, but there are only people really in my life now that I'm really really close with. I think you're not bringing people in is the difference. So like in the book, you talk about the scorched earth basically where it's like if

someone does you wrong, they're donezo. And I don't think that that's been the case at all really in the last eighteen months. It's just that you're not as prone to bringing someone in. You're a little bit more reserved with well. I think what the biggest differences is that I enjoy my time alone more than I ever have in my life. I used to not be able to hang out alone. I wanted people in my house all

the time. I wanted a full house. So the biggest difference is that I like coming home alone, and I like spending time with the dogs alone, and I do value like my time alone. I spend more time alone. I sit outside and read more, and I don't need noise as much as I used to, which is a nice it's a relief. And I didn't realize how many times I was leaning on socializing instead of just being alone with myself. It was a kind of a distraction.

And socializing is good, but I mean, I've done plenty of socializing in my life, Like I'm good if I want to take a little break from it. Do you feel the need to force yourself into those social interactions now, Yeah, yeah, I do sometimes. I mean I can become a little bit of a recluse, but that's only because when I go,

I go so hard. And if I'm promoting the book or if I'm on the road or promoting the documentary, it's like it's intense, intense, intense, and then I need to ze compress, which is actually something I never used to do. I did never like spent a day alone. But it's good to be interested in doing that. And it's good to be reading so many books. That's something that I was missing for a few years. I wasn't reading as many books as I used to. And uh,

I like that aspect. You're reading more to Brandon, I'm trying to Yeah, you're finishing more books. Right when I started, so about three years ago, you would start a lot of books and they would all have a few chapters in and now you actually finished and pass it on to somebody else. Yeah, that's writing, Tampa, because you finished it, you're still reading that fucking book. I mean, I do work a full time job. Where where do you work? Do you think getting all these kick is easy? I

gotta meet with these people, go golfing. It's unbearable. All right. Well back to kind of the last year, you release the book, you started in conversations, You've gone into stand up, you just had a documentary release, I have this podcast. Yeah, you have the podcast. Has there been one interaction since your growth that has really stood out to you, either with a fan or with one of your friends, or just like a moment in the last year that has

been kind of profound for you. I've gotten I mean, I've been getting a ton of messages that are just so much different than the tone of messages I used to get, and like I get a lot of I guess, you know, being on the road and doing these backstage we have these meet and greets after the shows, and people will say, oh, my gosh, I grew up on Chelsea Lately. I grew up on Chelsea Lately. Like I didn't realize at the time how popular that show was.

Very popular. Yeah, I didn't get that. So I think it's interesting now that I'm in this phase that I'm hearing all of that feedback, all these girls that are like, you know, twenty or that are like, oh my god, we've grew up watching you. That was nice because I was ready to hear it before when people used to talk about Chelsea Lately. I'd be like, oh God, up about that show already. I wasn't as proud of it

as maybe I should have been. In terms of it being perceived in the way it was and being motivating two girls to be proud of who they are and and have a loud voice. So all of those things, there were good things that came out of it as well. Um I think I pooh pooed it for a long time because it was just such a hard job to leave and it was like one of those ex boyfriends that I was trying to break up with and I couldn't and then I did and I was like, please

don't talk to me again. So that's nice to hear. And I think the feedback in general from the book and the documentary has been really nice because it feels like I'm finally contributing something instead of just cashing a

check from my own purposes. Like what's nice to be able to say I want to do a documentary and about this subject matter and let and and be able to you know, that in itself is a privilege, and it's also being around for so many years and being able to decide what you're gonna do creatively is a huge privilege. But I now realize how much privilege I have, so I'm much more careful with it. I feel like in terms of what I'm going to use that advantage for.

You can write a book about anything, you know. I wanted to write a book about something meaningful and true, and I wanted to do a documentary about an issue that was going to make people uncomfortable at myself included and like and get answers and start a conversation. Was it scary to make that choice to leave a hit show, go into another show that was doing really well and say, like, I don't want to do any of it anymore. I want to focus on myself and helping other people. Yeah,

but it's good to be I mean it was. It wasn't hard because I'm so impulsive that I didn't really have to think about it. I just had. I knew I had to do it. But it's a little bit destabilizing, but it's I I like that. I like it a little destabilization because you kind of have to scramble and figure out what you're gonna do and how you're gonna do it and what your moves are going to be.

But everything always works out. Do you think you're more successful ventures have been the ones where you've not thought about them, or the ones where you've taken a lot of time. Yeah, I think the ones that are more thoughtful, the ones that are the most authentic, the ones that

are true. Like the Chelsea Does series on Netflix was really authentic for me, and that was great, And this documentary, I mean, that's where I'm what I'm drawn to the most now is having conversations with real people about real issues and real ways to get involved, to do actionable things, to show up for other communities, not just your own. Okay, we're gonna take a quick break and we'll be right back. Well back to what's important. Okay. So one night I

had this epiphany. I was really stoned, and I was in my bed and I was like, because you know, I assault anybody who is listening to this Burton Bernie or my dogs, and if you don't know that by now, then you don't know me. So one night they came over and I was like, you know what, I'm not going to assault them, because that's my problem. I cannot

keep my hands off of them. I get a little bit of Harvey Wine stain around my dogs and I know they don't like it, but I don't get to spend as much time with them as I would like because Birt's too fat to travel and Bernice is a bit so I sometimes want to grab them and put them in my bed. And I used to take them upstairs with a leash and force them to go. I had to guide them or lure them with turkey or

roast beef or whatever. You know, my bell decides to buy that week, because obviously I'm out of those decisions. And I one night, I was like, oh, I was all. You know, I was going through this phase about learning how to be present and what that meant and and not trying to get them to come to me, but just being aware and being there. And as soon as I stopped tackling them, they both kind of like meandered over to me and both wanted to like be in

bed with me without me pursuing them. And I was like, Oh, that's what it's like. You just have to be available, not be pushing it. And of course I haven't been able to follow that because you know, you've seen Bird walking around the house strutting his stuff. It's very hard for me not to pick him up, spin him around on his back and rub his balet while his head is in my lap. He is just such a meaty little names just so, such a fur ball. And when I sleep at night and his head is on my chest,

it's like having the lion came with me. Bernice won't stay in the bed because she knows that I got to take a piss in the bathroom. Yeah, she likes to piss in the bathroom. Well, last night I did go to beds fairly early, so she was probably holding her bladder. But at least they're going in the bathroom now on the hardwood instead of the us or on the hard floors. I should say the success. Yes, but my relationship with them has blossomed. For those of you concerned,

they do love me more than they used to. Like Bernice comes in the car with me whenever I go to ben Bruno or can take her and Bert is you take her places to that? I have to question. I'm like, are you sure you can take her into the doctor's office. Well, in those instances, she doesn't come into a doctor's office. She sits in the car with the windows open. And in the tesla they have the air conditioning for dogs, so when you get out you can leave the A cr has everything. Yeah, it does.

I wonder how much money you got for that car, don't worry about it. Yeah. So you've been seeing Dan now for about two years. You don't go as frequently as you used to. But has there been an instance where you're like, oh, I need to recoporate. I better go see Dan. What was the last time you're like this,

I need to tune up. Uh? Well, I try to see him, Like, you know, I haven't seen him in like probably three weeks right now, but I don't see him as much as I used to because I think the important thing about therapy, and I maybe read this somewhere, but is that you get all this information and then you need to learn how to apply it to your real life without being in a codependent relationship with your therapist. Like I don't want to be the type of person

that's calling Dan on the phone in a crisis. I want to be able to manage my own crisis. Has there been a time where something happened and you're like Brandon schedule disappointment. Yes, yeah, I mean not recently, but yeah, and while I was in therapy, for sure, Like I went on a trip with a friend and we got into it and I thought I wasn't doing anything but you know wrong, And he guided me about apologizing and I was like, no way am I going to apologize.

I haven't done anything. And he's like, that's not the point, and he goes, it's not about being right, it's about being empathetic, Like it doesn't matter if you think you

did anything wrong. You have to just be a good friend and say I'm so sorry I made you feel that way, I'm so sorry this and that, And it was really hard for me to do that, but I I am so glad I did because that was the first step in being able to forgive people, especially when you don't think you've done anything wrong, because it really is about the need to be right is always wrong.

So the need to prove your point. You know what, just yesterday you were trying to prove your point to me because I had sucked up something and you were right about it. Do you remember what that was. No, I tried to not do that or make you feel that way. Well, you did it well and I heard you loud and clear. You were right. So I hope you're happy. I wish I knew what it was, and I'd be thrilled, I'm sure, But the need to be

right was a good thing. And that's also another thing for people who are like really into learning about I don't know, I guess presents and like Eckart Toole and that Oprah win Free. That ten episode podcast about a New Earth was so helpful to me in terms of understanding about not sweating the small stuff, about not getting stressed out about stupid little things, trying not to obviously I'm not perfect um, and that everything will be okay.

I used to get so annoyed with people when they said everything's going to be okay, because it's like, what a pat statement. How can you say everything's gonna be okay? But the bottom line is, even if people die, even if people get sick, you are going to be okay. As long as you're breathing, you have the chance to be okay. And so that, in conjunction with Dan really let me understand Okay, there's no reason to stress anymore. There's no reason to get an email and freak out

and stomp your fingers and responding to it. It's just better to like let everybody be and just chill and have a positive vibration. I think that's important to not bring in, like, you know, the negativity and stuff, because it's hard when you're like me. You know, everyone knows what kind of mood I'm in basically the way I look, So it's it's beneficial for me to be able to

be in a good mood most of the time. And I would say I am pretty most of the time in a good mood on the days that you're not. Do you have a mantra that you use? I think mantras are so stupid. But you're just saying that everything's okay because mine is. Is it really worth being mad over? But I think I've said that to you before because my aunt told me that I would get so angry about everything, and one time we were on the phone and I was bitching about something. She goes, but is

it really worth thing mad over? Like, start asking yourself that because everything that's not Yeah, that's a good point. Now, I don't have a mantra, because you know that's the stupid thing. No, just kidding, I know people have them. I don't have a mantra. I just kind of just breathe. I'm really into like taking a deep breath and just being present. And it sounds really corny, but it's corny because it's it's like, it's works. It totally works. You know.

I never was conscious about my breathing. I was never like, if somebody is talking a lot and I feel judgment and like, oh my god, why won't they shut up? I take a breath. Anytime I feel judgment towards anyone, I'm like, take a deep breath and be in the moment, like you have no right to be judging other people.

And that's nice. I think for a long time, I felt I had a superiority complex because I felt like I just knew a little bit more than everybody, and that was you know, Dan kind of took that away from me, like he made me understand, oh, we're all here together, we're all equal. You're not doing more than another person. You don't have more of a burden than another person. It's just all part of your perspective. And once I got on an even playing field and realized, Okay,

I'm down with the people. There's nothing special about me, then I started to get real. And then you feel really grounded. I feel way more in control of my life than I ever have because I know that I've got my head on straight. Now. So what would you say to the people listening who feel that they are too self aware or that they're superior to therapy, that they feel like they know too much to need to talk to someone, Well, maybe you know some people. I

don't know that every single person needs therapy. I would say that most people who claim to be self aware are probably not. You know, I think anytime you claim to be something, it's probably not that true. Are those people who need therapy most? Maybe? I mean I don't think everybody needs therapy, but everybody needs the space to like think and reflect and be calm. So it's like whether that's yoga or meditation, or therapy or going for

a run. You know, there are different forms of it, but there's great value to me and paying somebody to tell you what your issues are, you know, I like that transaction. I like paying Dan to say, hey, you have an empathy deficit and you have you know, like that's really helpful. UM so much so, you know what I watched the other nights UM Couples Therapy on on showtime. Have you seen that? I heard of it? It was really good. It's like this it's a real therapist and

she has like five different couples. They rotate in and out, and they take this whole season takes you through all these different couple stories and whether break up or stay together, and then her story with her clinical advisor about how she deals with being a therapist and getting like a second opinion on her. It's really good. I mean, I watched the whole series yesterday when I was in bed

or Sunday. But that's a good recommendation on on Showtime. Okay, well, this sounds like a good time to take a break. There's another disgusting show on Showtime about Roger Ailes called The Loudest Voice, where he gets a blowjob from Annabelle Wallace that is so revolting, It is so disgusting, and Roger Ailes just basically went into work every day and thought he was supposed to get his dick sucked by any woman that was working there, and a lot of

them did it. And that was one of the most upsetting series I've ever seen, because I just, I mean, I literally turned off the TV and just sat in bed thinking about how disgusting he was and how how foul men are to assume that women are there to suck dick. I mean, honestly, aren't they doing a movie with Charley's Yeah, Charley says, a movie with Nicole kimm In and Margot Robbie coming out on the Roger Ale story. I don't know when that comes out, probably soon. It's

fascinating though. I also watched Chernobyl last night. Once we got you logged into HBO go yeah, yeah, Brandon, once you got your kick back from HBO co I'll be able to retire soon for anyone listening, just I thought I thought we were retiring together. We are. We're gonna go skiing this winter and we're gonna find a ski Shelle and I want to tell all our podcast listeners to that. Um, I will be back with a podcast

when I have something interesting to podcast about. It's just not something I wanted to do, like ongoing every week. I'm about to leave for a month on tour, so I'm going to Australia. I'm going to Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne and Auckland to perform, and then I'm going to go on vacation. I'm going to Portugal and Spain. Am I meeting up with you in Spain? Brandon? We will not cross paths, but will have the house set up

for your beautiful Brandon. We're going to Spain for my sister Shoshana's fiftieth birthday, which means she's been alive for fifty years, which is so fucking weird. Yeah, aging is really tricky. And yeah, I'm going to be forty five this year and you just Brandon, I can't believe I scored such a young buck. I know, and I'm here for the long haul. What other questions do you have for me? Brandon? Well, do you ever feel like you're

plateau ing and your personal growth? Um, that's a good question. Yeah, I mean I don't know, I think with anything. I think my friend once told me this that his his mom was a teacher, and she's like, there's a period of learning and then there's a period of growth for all young kids. Like you absorb, you absorb your information and then you enact it like and you and and it and it becomes part of your life and then

you actually have time to digest it. So like going to school, you're like, all this information is thrown at you and then say you have summer break to attally contemplated, even though that's not what summer feels like it's kind of the information and the learning registering in your brain. And that's how I feel about therapy. I feel like I went full throttle for about a year and a half or two years, and then I just decided to

pare it down. The thing that I have a real issue with is social media is something that I needed to I need to come like to reconcile with because I don't approve of it yet I am part of it, you know. I feel like it's detrimental for so many reasons, and I don't like myself on it, Like when I'm when I'm scrolling and read like, I want to be in engaging with my fans. That's important to me, and

I do that on social media a lot. So it's kind of like it's actually for people who don't know it is actually her who's commenting back, And yeah, my assistants aren't commenting back on d M S. I am and and but that you know, also, I don't need any damns about cock sucking or you know, your paintings, Like I'm just responding to people who have questions and

comments about the work that I'm doing. But I definitely find you know, like for instance, when my book came out and my documentary came out, both of those surrounding days, I was like tied to my screen and checking messages and responding. And while that's good and it don't I don't, you know, let it go on for more than that. It still feels like it's doing me. I'm not doing it. And what are you checking for? Are you checking for?

I don't know. I mean I'm checking for. No, I'm checking to engage with my fans, That's what I'm doing. I try not to scroll around on Instagram for too long because that just leads to silliness. Um. I try and support the people that I love that are on there and leave comments when I can, But I don't like it. It's like anything in life, like the cannabis. I don't want cannabis to do me. I want to do cannabis. I don't want alcohol to do me. I want to do alcohol. I want to be in control

of all of the extracurricular activities I have. And Twitter I like because it's actually much more informational, but Instagrams specifically, there's just like I have a resistance to it. I think it's so bad for a lot of people's mental health. I know it was for me that you just it's also just staring into a black hole at all times, and it's just dumb. It's dumb like on vacation, when our families on vacation and you know, anyone's on their phone.

It's annoying. It's like, are you seriously checking Instagram right now? I mean, I'm guilty of that too, but it just feels like it's not a good the best use of anyone's time, and like let's all be a little bit more cognizant of that. But the therapy has forced you to kind of reassess things. And again it I hate to use the word, but in your brand, like that's had a big change too, because again on Chelsea lately was basically making fun of brading people all the time,

and you've really dialed that down. Yeah. I mean I don't even like to do it in my personal life even now. And some of my friends are you know that that annoys them. It's like, oh, really, now you're not going to do that. It's like, well, is that really how we have to like talk make fun of

every single person? I don't like that anymore. And I'm you know, I mean not in a way that obviously if somebody, you know, I can get down with people, but it's just it's just negative, negative, negative, negative, complaining, complaining,

even if you're complaining about somebody else, you're complaining. And do you feel like your fans response to that are people like when you're on social media and you see that that people have been receptive, because I know, right when you left Netflix and decided to take the time off to help people get elected, there were conversations like, you're going to lose your base. The people who love you for being kind of a bit they're not going to like this new you. Yeah, I mean, I don't

really care about the fans that I've lost. If you like, you know, it doesn't matter, because you're going to have different fans or new fans, or those people are going to grow up with you, which is the case with a lot of my fans are like, wow, this is so much better than I used to love you. But now this is great, Like you're teaching me about therapy,

about meditation or whatever it is. And you know, I think anybody who really is a true fan is going to be around no matter what, because I'm always talking about what's happening in my world, and I'm being authentic

about it. I'm never faking it. I'm never making up a persona that's not true, and I'm always sharing information about what's working for me in life, so those people know that they can rely on me for the truth, which is you know why I feel so passionately about sharing my stories because that's, I guess you know, ultimately what I am as a storyteller. And once I accepted that, it was like so much easier to get back into stand up. But also the quality of work, I would say,

is different because you've made that change. And so the people who were saying that, you know, people might not be as interested if you're not making the jokes about somebody. There's been a huge cultural shift now to where if you were still doing that, it may not benefit you at all because now people are more thoughtful about how you were ahead of the curve almost right, Yeah, Well,

I've been ahead of a lot of curves luckily. Luckily I know when to leave and when I went to get out, when to get out of a situation, and went to get into one sometimes a little bit, you know, it takes a little bit longer, or sometimes it's a little premature. You could argue both, but yeah, yeah, I like where I am, so it's not really my concern if other people don't. And the people that love it great.

You know, Well, now you've gotten back into stand up, which you said you would not do a couple of years ago. You're like absolutely zero interest, Like, what was the catalyst for your desire to do it again? Was it the fact that it was therapeutic being in a room hearing people laugh at things that you thought were difficult to discuss. Yeah, I think I just missed. I didn't really give enough credit to or credence to how much I enjoyed being in front of a live audience.

I think because I just forgot. And it was so nice to see how excited people were to be on that tour, and I just thought, oh, this is so nice, Like, I don't have anything holding me back from extending this. And after I did about ten shows of interviews, I had enough stories from the book that I knew this is a one woman show, this is a stand up show, and and then I just realized, oh, okay, this is what I'm supposed to be doing like now I have

a message. Now I have a native about getting healthy and it's fucking funny and I can bring people through that it's not just getting up on stage and telling jokes. And also I'm not ship faced. I mean, it's a whole different world being sober on stage when I go out there, like i've I always took it for granted, and I thought alcohol was my fuel, like I needed to drink to get through two shows or one show and a book signing like I needed it. And so

now I realized, no, you don't. It's much better to be present and get you know, now I'm on stage for an hour and a half, whereas before I used to like be waiting for like your earliest possible minute to get off stage. So, so how do you keep that spark going into next year? You know? Are you are you interested in still doing stand up? And if so, how are you not going to burn yourself out again?

And you're just gonna take more time between things? Yeah, I think I'll do this tour And we just added these fifteen dates and I think I'll do this until I and then I'll shoot a special. I'm not going to go at a break next speed for sure, because I don't want to burn out and I want to be able to do these other projects. I want to shoot more documentaries, and I have some other things you

know that I have to do. So I'm excited to like to do this, to shoot a special, and to just keep putting out, you know, things throughout the year. It's it's easy that it feels very lucky that I was able to find what I was looking for so quickly, you know, like fulfilling work and doing stuff that mattered to me as as it felt like as soon as I did the therapy and was present and focused and calm, things just started coming to me in a much more

easy way. Everything, so I felt much more effortless. Even the stuff that was effort full felt okay, well this is the right thing right now. Um. So it's just a level of stress that I don't have anymore. I would say that that was really evident with the stand up, because you weren't looking to do it at all. You just kind of fell back into it. Yeah. I mean every manager and agent was like, please do stand up, Please do stand up. That's your money maker, that's your

money maker. I'm like, I'm not doing stay end up. There is no way I'm doing stand up, and then cut to twenty days later, I'm like, I think I want to do some stand up shows. But that's me in a nutshell. I mean, you know, I say no, no, no, as long as it's anybody else's idea. So that's it. The cool question, Brandon is when are you going to start doing stand up? Not even an option. I would like to give a shout out to Karen for her wedding.

She's on her honeymoon now, bitch. As many of you know her just got married this weekend to her long time lover Mica Sligh and uh, they had a very very beatific wedding in Mexico this weekend. M Is there anyone else we want to say goodbye to from this podcast? Brandon? Are you just want to get back to Wendy's for that Frosty Man? Is that you want right now? Is that frost I mean? We should. We should thank Dan for all of his work on you and the multiple

times he came on the pot. Yeah, we should thank Dan. We should thank Sophie, thank you very much. We should thank our sound engineer, is it Mike Great? Well, that's who we meant and originally Sophie's our producer. I don't think she's been introduced, Okay, so if he's a producer, she's been here for every episode. And I want to thank all of you guys for tuning into us. And you can follow us well, yeah, you can follow us

on Instagram. Make sure you don't abuse it, and uh, you can keep up with everything I do on Twitter or my accountable page. If you're looking for ways to be socially little, socially active, I'm saying it again, social activism. If you're looking for ways to be social activism, go there and Twitter, Facebook, Emily's List partnered with Emily's List, I'm still partnered with them to elect pro uh uh

progressive Democratic woman. And I guess I will just say I hope everybody is doing a little bit better than they were when we started our podcast, audios Life will be the Death of Me as a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from I Heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.