Hey, guys, welcome back to another episode of Life. I'm Card, I'm Brittany, and I'm Moura.
And it feels like it's been a minute. Well it's only been a minute since we got a little bit jazzy last week and did our Tuesday episode on the Thursday, So this all feels like it's come very quickly and we're slightly ill prepared. Don't tell anyone, tell them, oh shit.
Oh dear, We're actually not ill prepared at all. I have prepared this chat and it will be brilliant. Guys, we have a cracking episode for you. Of course we do, and we are so hot and ready. This episode is on situationships just FYI, so strap in. Usually we have a bit of a chat first, we leave the listeners hanging, then we drop what the topic is.
But you just like jumped straight in. I was trying something new. You're like, please don't do that ever again. There's some big news in our world. It's in the bachelor world. Yeah, the Batch world. Him and Anna, the o G bachelor couple. I haven't a.
Baby, and it is just like I know you and Matt are proof, but this is real proof.
It's like they're Oh, we weren't proof enough for you. Now you're proof enough.
But there's something about being an original gangster bachelor, like the first in Australia. And I just think it's nice. They're both great people. They love each other, Like seven years.
Now, they've done it in the right sequence of events, Like they had a long term relationship, then they got married, now they're having a baby. We were like shotgun Vegas had a baby, still not married. We don't know what we're doing. You don't count. No, you run your own race. You definitely count. We set this shit on fire.
Look, your journeys were both very different, but that's okay.
Everyone's journey is different. There's always got to be a no frills bachelor couple, Babe, that's me. I'm here for it, man. I think I'm the no frills. If anyone's no.
Frills, you're the no boyfriend bachelor couple. In Ice, Laura Burns, were they hurt? Actually that hurt? But also it puts me in hysterios, like whenever I think about it, and I'm like, yes, Brittany, that would be you. But when someone else burns me and cuts me off at the knees, it's like hurts for a second and then you have to.
Laugh, but you know it's only me cutting you off the knees. No, guys, you guys can all laugh.
But I think that's really brilliant. I love that they're the original gangsters. Lived apart, they lived together, they got married in this beautiful ceremony, and now they're having a baby.
And can you imagine how cute it's going to be. Also, it's the biggest f you to all of the shitty media who six months ago was like Tim and Anna are breaking up. Tim and Anna live separately, and the media can be so quick to try and dissect and shit on someone's relationship just because they're doing it against the norm. I'm so happy for them, but this is such a beautiful way for them to be like, screw you,
daily Mail. That's another thing I wanted to bring up is how does daily Mail, who reported that they were pregnant like two weeks before they announced it, How does daily Mail know?
I would like to ask Tim and Anna this, Actually let's get them on, but I'd like to ask that. But I think what was happening. I read and heard some things that and I just hadn't been drinking at some events. You know, you know how the daily mail works, and they're got to see one thing for them to speculate in hopes that there's a percentage.
That they're right. There's been no events. Well it's a mystery, it's the next file. The reason my ass this is because when when Matt and I were pregnant, they knew. They knew before we came out and said we were, and I hadn't been to any events, We hadn't done anything. And then the second that we did go to an event and I had had a glass of water, but I was also driving, and they knew I was driving,
so it shouldn't have been that suspicious. They were like, Laura's pregnant, that's a baby bump and everything was inflated. But they knew. And I don't know how. I think that they get inside and knowledge from.
Like appointments where they have scans or you guys have like obsgyny appointments.
Who knows, or even maybe someone from the clinic actually gives that information up. Like I really think that the peraps in Sydney or the paps in Australia have such crazy amount of insight to stuff before it even happens.
You literally need the Tinese belly, and the media says you're pregnant.
You know what?
This reminds me of? Poor Jennifer Aniston. I love Jennifer Andison.
She's my crush.
She'd almost be my whole past I think she's the best thing since sliced bread. The media have been speculating she's pregnant for twenty years. She literally will say, I'll drink a glass of water, I'm pregnant. I eat a pasta, I'm pregnant. I put on one kilo, I'm pregnant.
It's actually really shit, especially if you're someone who's in a position where you want to be pregnant or you're having some fertility issues and then you're constantly getting this line of question. It's bad enough when it comes from your friends and family, which happens to so many people, but then to have the media put this microscope on you and be like when are they having a baby? Why aren't they pregnant? Oh, look, they're pregnant. Oh is that a baby bump?
Also, imagine if they were reporting on that early and you were and something happened like like what happened to you when you miscarried. It's just like an even more of a slap in the face. I think it's a really touchy subject and they need to be more careful with it.
But moving on to.
Someone else that has just announced they're pregnant, and I think it's gonna be the most good looking child in the universe.
Gigih did Inzane. They are so young, she's twenty five. I think I know that that's when our parents were having kids, and I know that's when a lot of people have kids. Like, I'm not against it, but when I was twenty five, was out getting blackout drunk and eating toast for dinner.
Oh my god, I was like, do I have toast or cereal for dinner? I have toast for dinner, like five out a seven nights toast or salmon? Right, wasn't it the true A single girl, a single girl meal? Yeah, salmon. I don't know you judging me.
I feel like you're judging me.
But they've come out as pregnant, and I think the funny thing about that is they didn't announce it. It was speculated in the media. First again, the paparazzi and the media agencies, everybody came out saying that she was pregnant. She had no choice of poor thing but to say, well, yeah, yeah, I am.
That should be something that's so special and so sacred to a woman, and then that gets taken away from you. Imagine being twenty five, you're pregnant for the first time, and then you have to announce it to the whole wide world because it's already been taken away from you, that opportunity to have your pregnancy announcement. It's been taken away by the media. It's just like, you're already emotional enough. It's just wild to me that they're even allowed to do that.
Absolutely, but I cannot wait to see that child. It's Jean born to great genes and great money. So you're like, and I hope that the media reports on it, and I do not care. But what has actually happened in your week?
This week? Do you know what I feel like? This week has been the first week for me where the whole coronavirus and isolation and like the weird state of the world, the anxiety around it and the fear around it, and like the ominous pressure that I think everyone's been carrying around feels like it's started to lift a little bit. And I know that we can't like all sit on our laurels, but I do feel like there's not quite the same immense fear. You know, when you go to
the grocery store or you go down the street. It seems to be that there's a lot more people out and about doing stuff and just kind of getting on with life than what there was before. And I'm here for it. I am ready to get back to normal.
Okay, So I am going to be a bit contradictory at the moment with you, like and I like when we disagree sometimes.
Girl on then Bondi is like normal. It's ridiculous.
So everyone, if you guys don't know, Laura and I do both live in Bondi. It is the epicenter of Australia for coronavirus, and we struggled to get there with the lockdown, but eventually we did and everybody started to do the right thing, well most people, but.
It has been opened up. It is almost like normal. There are people everywhere.
I feel like the fear has gone, which I think is great because nobody should be afraid like that. But I do worry if someone in the medical industry, I do worry that we are jumping the gun a little bit early and we might have something like similar to Singapore. So Singapore was sort of like the world leaders in what to do and how to get back on track with corona and they eradicated it. And I put that in like inverted commerce. They eradicated it and got back
to normal, and the world was praising them. Then they got their second sweep. The virus came back again and it was worse than the first time, and that was because they just jumped to the gun a bit, got a bit ahead of themselves. And they are saying that a lot of countries are going to get their second sweep. They don't know what it's going to be like. But I'm just a bit fearful that we still have we still have cases, and I just think we're jumping.
Back in a little bit early. Purely my opinion.
People are going to disagree with me, and that's absolutely fine. I'm just a normal human that has an opinion. That's what I think.
I think we should have held off a little bit longer. Okay, When I say and I am going to disagree with you, just you know, to keep on the current trend brilliant. But it hasn't gone back to normal, Like the restaurants are still closed. Everything is like you can't say that Bono's normal. The beaches are still totally shut. You can only it's like one person in, one person out environment. Like I think that when I say that, I think
that the fear has lifted. I just feel like the way people go about their day and anxiety around it doesn't seem to quite be so heavy. Like I remember going into Woolworst and there was this real franticness around how people were shopping. It was it was like they were too scared to even talk to you or look at you, and you know, you'd cough and they'd run down the aisle kind of thing. And I just think
that there's a little bit more calm in people. I still think that that people are abiding by the laws around this area.
I don't think we're going to go back to that situation where people are buying out the supermarkets.
Yeah, like that craziness to stop.
Now, that was the unknown, the fear of the unknown. Nobody knew what was going to happen. We were looking at other countries and we were just thinking the absolute worst, and everybody was spending for themselves.
Well, do you know what I did read today which might come as a surprise to you. What have you been listening to the Corona cast at all? Not in the last few days. No, So there was a guy who this is a few episodes ago. This is not today's episode. This is going back about a few weeks ago. I'm a bit late to the party, guys, But there was a physician called doctor Norman Swan who got on there and talked about how it may be possible to catch coronavirus through your farts. What is that for real?
Make sure, guys, no bare bottom farting. You know, a face mask is just like jeans for your butt. It's a butt mask.
It's literally just jeans. I just wear undies. Just don't free wall.
It's a button mask. Kry Fanny and freeball. Wear your underpants, guys, stay protected. I'm going to butt mask all the masks. I'm gonna look.
Wrap yourself up. Let's like, let's get back to this next week. Until then, people, stay woke, stay safe, and wear your pans. Do you know what I learned today? Tell me that too hot to Handle our favorite couple, Harry and Francesca, and Harry was actually dating someone else up until the finale aired.
This is the best juice in the world. As you know, if you listened to last episode love Too Hot to Handle or Obsessed, it's disgusting. Brid had recommended to watch Too Hot to Handle. We talked about it for way too long, and we're going to talk about it again. But I had read that Harry and Francesca had broken up between and they're filming finished and when it's come out to air, which makes me highly suspicious as to how in love they might be or how many Instagram
followers they thought they might gain from this whole thing. Well, it's definitely true.
I've gone to have a little stalk of their page, their posts.
When they post together, the world froths it.
They get so much engagement, so much love because people are so people love love like us.
We love love. I mean, it's the reason why we follow reality TV dating shows because we want the happy ending at the end.
But it does make you wonder for sure when it comes out. Then he had another relationship that apparently he was even putting on Instagram, But I think it was even that secret.
Anybody who's followed reality TV, it's very obvious that if you were the couple at the end hashtag relationship goals, you're going to get some sort of Instagram notoriety out of it. They kind of come hand in hand. And he would have known that, and Francesco would have known that from seeing all the other TV shows that have gone before them.
Well, funny you say that because Harry was on a reality TV day show previously, right, he was on this New Zealand Heartbreak Island or something, and why he knew he knew how to play.
That, he knows how the reality TV world work. This doesn't mean that we don't like them. We love that. No, we sweitch here for it. We're just here calling a spade a spade. And I think the proof is in the pudding. Like if anybody who has watched Too Hot to Handle Him now has gotten onto the Instagram, these guys have skyrocketed over the space of about three and a half to four weeks from one hundred thousand followers
to close to three point five million followers. That is insane. Well, speaking of reality TV, so many people have been asking on the Instagram page and on the Facebook page, and we are here to tell you we don't know when Bachelor in Paradise is going to air. I like me, he doesn't know when Bachelin Paradise is going to air.
Don't you say we like we're a couples. Also, I just want to know if this woman ride here is in a goddamn relationship, because if she's not, I would like her to bring back her dating stories to the podcast. So I am just as much as you guys are waiting.
Yeah, as an update, and I can't get back to all of you, but you do message a lot. I actually do not know, hand on heart, I do not know when it's.
Going to air.
I do know it will air, and it will be soon. So just keep your eyes out.
As everyone knows who's been following this podcast since the very beginning, BRIT's number one my favorite thing was her outrageous dating stories because they were so outrageous, outrageous, they are outrageous, And now we have no meat raffle anymore, and we just have to sit here and wait and pond up.
There will be great, amazing, loving, beautiful stories to come, I will say patiently.
All right. So Britt was there anything that you've watched or listened to or read this week. What are your recommendations.
I do have a recommendation for something to watch, Actually I have two. If you're looking for a TV series just to get so deep into and so stuck into this vortex, I recommend Money Heist.
Have you watched that one? I've never seen it. It's no idea, it's Spanish, it's dubbed What Is with You? And dubbed ob Saved.
Okay, why I recommended Elite to you, guys, which was like a dubbed show as well in Spain. Turns out Spain only has a limited number of actors because a lot of these actors are in this new show, Money Heist. Money Highest is four seasons. You will be sucked in, Laura, I promise you. It's super high action, a lot of sex, a lot of beautiful people.
My recommendation.
Another recommendation I have is a movie I watched this week. It's a bit you have to actually download this one. It's a bit art HOUSEY didn't go to cinemas or anything like that as far as I know, but it's huge cast. It's basically Vince warn and Mel Gibson. It's called Dragged Across Concrete. And I haven't watched a movie in a long time where I haven't looked at my phone, I haven't emailed, I haven't done anything. I've just been really hooked onto the movie. A lot of action. I
just love the way it was filmed. Maybe it's someone that's acting and in that world. I really appreciated the way it was filmed, the dialogue and everything, but I was just really into it. It is disclaimer, it's violent. If you don't like violence, don't watch it. I don't usually like violence, but I loved this film. They're my recommendations, Laura, what about yours.
I don't normally get time to listen to or watch much like my life is pretty filled with just running around after a small child and trying to stop her from running into sharp corners and objects you did get too hot to handle in though, that is my whole life, and that around hot, too hot to handle. But if you have a free hour and a half, it's just one it's one episode or one movie. I guess you'd
say it's a documentary. It's called Murder to Mercy. It's just come out on Netflix and It follows the story of this young girl, Saintoya Brown, who was she was convicted of murder, and it talks about the talks about the laws in Tennessee in the States basically, which is like crazy. Is like, if you are a juvenile and you commit murder in Tennessee back in the day, you would have to sit trial for them to decide whether or not they were going to try you as an adult.
And some kids as young as eleven or twelve were tried as adult. And if you were tried as an adult for murder, the minimum sentence that you would be given is fifty one years. So these young children who were being so twelve year olds have been tried for I mean fifty one years for murder and it's blanket. It's like it didn't take into account like your circumstances
or the reasons behind it was. If that was if you had committed murder, no matter what your age was, no matter the circumstances, if it went through as an adult trial, fifty one years, So what you was this?
So she was convicted in two thousand and four, But then it follows her story through Murder to Mercy kind of gives away the plot twist, right, but it's just the most amazing story about a woman who had a really really troubled upbringing and she had no hope in the world, Like she was a child who just was abused as a child, ended up prostituting herself out really young, got involved in drugs, had like a horrible boyfriend who she thought was her boyfriend at the time, but then
realized actually he was just a pimp who was using her and she and she killed someone because she was scared and frightened. And it goes through the story of how she ended up in the system, and then the amazing people and the team around her and like people like Rhianna got behind it and like all these celebrities trying to like help free Sentoya Brown, and it actually pushed the reform for the law changes within Tennessee. Guys, I cried from the beginning of this to the end
of this. It is if it's very very triggering. It's like there's a lot of domestic abuse in this, there's a lot of childhood violence and childhood trauma. But it was just the most beautiful story of redemption and story about how people are not defined by their past. And just because a child makes bad decisions or a child behaves badly doesn't mean that they're a lost case. They need to have a support team around them.
And it is goose bumps, Like I feel upset listening.
It is incredible and I cannot recommend this enough, I think honestly, I cried from the beginning to the end. Matt was like, do we need to turn this off? And I was like, no, this is so important and everyone needs to watch this.
How old was she when she went to jail. She was sixteen sixteen, so she literally never had a childhood. I'm sorry, but if you've already been a prostitute and abused and you've murdered someone your childhood was, you don't have one.
It had been and she never had one in the first place because her mother was also a victim of domestic violence and rape when she was a child, and her mother had abused substances the whole time that she was pregnant, and so Sentoya was actually born with fetal alcohol syndrome. It just goes through the cycle of just like systemic family abuse and what that can do to a child and the trauma that they will take through
with them through to adulthood. But it has a really really beautiful ending and she is like an advocate now for sex trafficking and it's incredible. I cannot recommend it enough, but I don't give that recommendation very lightly. It's just a heavy, really heavy thing to watch.
It reminds me actually of I recently watched the Trials of Gabriel Fernandez.
Did you watch that. I haven't seen it. You should watch that. Come.
It like weighs heavily on my heart to recommend shows like this because it's so tragic, but it also should be highlighted to the world that this sort of thing's going on. But it's essentially just a system that let a little boy down. He was in such an abusive, abusive family, Like it's horrific. I'm not even going to talk about it in detail here, but it's just about the system that let him down, how he fell through the cracks, how many people could have helped him but didn't.
And I think it really highlights an awareness of if you guys ever thinking something's going wrong or you think you can help someone do it. But it sounds like very similar to the show you've just recommended.
Murder to Mercy. So I think these are two shows that.
Are really important and people should probably I guess, be brave enough to delve into.
I think that that's the perfect word for it, because there's nothing it's not entertaining, and it's not something that you really watch and like you're like, oh, I want to watch this, But it was so poignant and so incredible to see the difference in this woman that I so deeply recommend it. It's just it moved me like nothing has moved me in a very long time. Well, now where do we go from that? Sorry? Guys, Usually it's all really uplifting recommendations, but you know, like, oh,
they're so equally important. We're all about the laughs and the lightheartedness.
But you and I have a very deep and serious side too, and this is something that obviously, like really pulls at our heart, especially you being a mother. I'm not a mother, and I actually in this case, I don't think it matters. It doesn't matter, absolutely, it really doesn't. It's the full spectrum, right, And I think one of the things that was the most interesting part about this
whole documentary was the shift in perception over time. So since two thousand and four to today twenty twenty children who were tried at the time, she was tried as a prostitute. She was tried as as an adult, like someone who was living like this deviant, drug addicted life. But now if she was tried today in twenty twenty, because of the law reforms, she would be tried as a child that was sex trafficked. But she wasn't given that. Yeah, she wasn't given that chance when she was that age.
So it's really interesting to see how something that's so close to us like it happened in our lifetime, how much change has happened, and how people's empathy has changed.
Okay, well, recommendations aside.
I think it's time to jump in this song a little bit lighter, a little bit funner, And that is our favorite segment.
Accidentally unfiltered that was so like canned nineties com funniest home videos or something. That's what it sounded like, spirit fingers. I don't know, I'm trying to like dance out the side here. Okay, let's say it again.
Our favorite segment accidentally unfiltered that was so rehearsed.
I'm the only thing that's rehearsed. Do you have one, Laura, I have an accidentally unfiltered today, And guys, if you aren't sure what accidentally unfiltered is, basically, this is a segment that we've brought to the podcast, which we freaking love and it is when you, guys send us your most embarrassing fuck ups and we just laugh in your face. Pretty much. Now, we laugh with you, not at you. We laugh at you and also with you if you
ready to laugh at yourself. But it could be when you have accidentally sent a message to the wrong person, or you know, you sent your mom a dick pic. Who knows what you've done. We've all done something. We've all been there, maybe not the dick actually pretty much the dick pic anyway. So this one is very very fitting for the current Corona pandemic. Everyone's working from home, everyone's on zoom calls, and this one is specifically about a zoom call fuck up. So I was on a
zoom call with my class this morning. Now I haven't been up this early in a while, so I was really really groggy. I put my camera off and I muted myself because I just wasn't asked to be into the conversation, so I felt this gurgling in my stomach. Of course, she did realize what I needed to do, and I realized, I go to break some wind. So I had a plan. I'll just mute myself, release it, and then unmute myself as though nothing happened. So I clicked the mute button, let it rip, and then I
unmute with myself. There was an eerie silence in the room, and then some people started giggling, and I knew something had gone terribly wrong. And then I realized I was already on mute from when I joined the call, and she unmuted. Everyone heard me, free the beast. Everyone watched me. Everyone saw me out of the blue, unmute myself, cut the cheese, and then mute myself again. The worst thing that happened to me and lockdown. Yes girl, Also, who says cut the cheese? I have what is that term?
Good though?
Because cheeses are very smelly sometimes, but they're also delicious.
But that weird. God, I would die like love.
Hey did she have to unenroll from school? Yeah, she's moved to Switzerland. She's on her way there now.
She's neutral. Yeah, she's out of you. Could you fucking imagine and then having to like get on the next with your class. I actually couldn't. And what do you do? Also, I want to know what do you do? Do you just address it? No? Shef she just then exited the meeting, is what she said. So she exited the lecture.
Funny because everyone gets a notification, like Brittany exited group, like you get you get a notification, right, it's.
Like almost worse. You've totally just taken claim for what you've done. She should have just like typed texting me like did someone just fart? Who's that? I just like put on someone else? Imagine if this was real life though, Like you're sitting in a UNI electure hall and you were sitting there, everyone's quiet, You stand up, drop a fart, and then walk out. Because that's what it isn't it. Yeah, like you you purposely unmuted yourself. You made more of
a big deal about it. Like if you had just been vocal the whole time, they wouldn't have known who farted.
It'd be the equivalent of an election hall standing up, lifting your leg and doing it and then leaving. I feel like that's the woman and then being like Mike dropped by Felicia.
Well, I do think we need to get into the topic for today, Britt. This is the topic. We have a topic. Guys. We're talking, as I said early on, jump the gun, as it were, we are talking situationships, which, even if you are in a relationship right now, I I'm sure as hell that there has been some point in your life where you have been in the situationship.
So if you guys don't know what a situationship is, it's essentially just a relationship that hasn't yet had a label. It hasn't been defined, it doesn't have a name. So anything that precedes DTR. Do you know what DTR is, Laura, down to.
Relationship? Oh my god, No, it's actually not.
It stands for defining the relationship. So it's that conversation that.
You have my boyfriend.
Yes, it's that conversation where no one wants to have it at any age. But it's funny because every age from like sixteen to fifty, that conversation happens, but it happens differently, and it's and it's called the define the relationship moment, the DTR moment. It's very different from the other moments, which might be the DTF moments very very different.
They do not have to go hand in hand. Please do not confuse the two. But also I find it very ironic and it's not lost on me that the whole premise of a situationship is when you have an undefined, unlabeled relationship and now we're going to call it a label twenty twenty of us make sure we label the unlabeled relationship that you have.
Dude, everything has a name. It's a situationship now. But last year it was a booty call. The year before that it was friends with benefits. They have names.
So I think booty call is different to situationship, not if it's a booty call every week. I think a booty call is literally just a booty call. That's when that guy sends a you up text and you slight go over there, and you know you're not gonna watch Netflix. You know you're gonna get ten minutes into that show. You're not gonna be watching Centoya Brown getting all deep and crying on the couch holding each other. You're gonna sit there and have a bit of popcorn and then
have sex. That's it. A situationship could be more than that, Like you could actually be investing emotions and time and semi dating and seeing the guy three or four times a week. You could be thinking that it's heading towards a relationship. But that guy said, oh, I don't want a relationship. I like, I'm too busy with work, I don't want anything serious, And it could go on for a really long time, and it's just a situationship.
Yeah, And I guess, I guess that is a difference. I guess the idea is it's a type of non committal relationship. But there are so many types of noncommittal relationships, and like you just said, they all have labels now, and like I just said, beauty calls, one night stands, situationships. They're all types of non committal relationships, which unfortunately are so common now that they're almost more common than a relationship.
And I think one of the interesting things about situationships as well, And like you guys a gonna get so sick of this word because it's just gonna use it over and over and over to describe everything in this topic. But one of the interesting things about it is like in theory, they're meant to be two people who want something casual coming together and both of their like sexual urges are satisfied. Right Like that in theory sounds like a great concept. In reality, it doesn't always seem to
work out that way. Like in reality, these types of relationships, these casual relationships that don't really have an end date and don't really eventuate into anything usually and off more often than not, mean that one person is more emotionally invested than the other. One person ends up getting hurt. And so what we wanted to unpack on this episode
is your situationship that you're in doing you damage. Do you need to leave this relationship because it doesn't have an end date, it's not going anywhere and you're wasting time on this Or for example, have you bunker down with someone during isolation and then realize kind of now, oh, actually I don't really want a long term relationship with this person. I was using them as an emotional crutch. I think these are all questions that you can ask
yourself if you find yourself in these situations. But whether or not you're in one now, I can guarantee that there has been a point in your life where you have been in a situationship.
Oh yeah, if you haven't been in it, you will be in it because they are so common, and I think it's like this paradox of choice now with online dating, I think that's something that has fed the situationship because people are so scared to commit now because you can so easily and accessibly swipe and find someone else to talk to you. No one wants to commit in case something better is around the corner. Don't get me wrong.
The time and a place for a situationship absolutely, but without doubt the time is going to come.
It's science that you're going to catch a feeling.
It's called oxytocin. You cannot do anything about it. You're going to go into a situationship being like this is cool. I want this to I don't want to commit. I want to be casual. I want to see what it's out there. I want to have sex with you and have someone to talk to, but not be doing anything wrong if I'm with somebody else. People love that liberating feeling.
People love the freedom. The time will come, and as a PhD relationship expert, author and speaker at Berkeley University, Amy Medcalf says.
Ninety percent of the time.
The people that are going to catch the feelings are women because of our friend oxytocin. When you kiss and cuddle and feel affection and have sex and have intimate moments, whether you want you or not, you release oxytocin and all of a sudden, you want more.
We have touched on this in the past episode many many moons ago. It was one of the early early episodes we did, and I guess I had talked about a relationship that I had that lasted for a whole year, and I'm sure there'll be somebody else out there who can identify with this. I met a guy I really liked him, and I convinced myself that I was we were just seeing what happens. We're going to see what happens.
After a few months, realized I wanted to date him, and and I said, you know, like, where is this going. We had that chat and he made it very very clear. He verbalized to me that he wasn't interested in a girlfriend because he was really really committed to his work at the moment and he wanted to prioritize work. He thought having a girlfriend would take away from that. And I was like, okay, but in my head, I was like, well,
we do everything that couples do. We go out for dinner, I see you three or four times a week, like we hang out all the time. You treat me like I'm your girlfriend. I treat you like you're my boyfriend. I was like, I like, he's going to change his mind. He's going to change his mind. So I so I stayed and I hoped that he would change his mind.
And then a few months later we had the conversation again his mind hadn't changed, but like in the meantime, he'd bought me Christmas presents, like he'd celebrate on my birthday.
We still you'll behave like we were a couple. And it dawned on me after about a year, literally a year of dating this guy, that nothing was going to change, and that even though he was behaving in a way and acting in a way and showing me physically that I was the relationship he had verbally been saying to me for all this time, that he wasn't interested in anything more than what it was a situationship, and I
was projecting what I wanted onto that. But I got really hurt when that relationship didn't work out, But it was because I was so much more emotionally invested in than he was.
So was the reason that he was saying he was acting like your partner but didn't want it? Was it because he wanted to see other people? Was that the only reason? No, he wasn't seeing anyone else. That's that's the crazy thing. So what was he He just didn't want to be tied down. He didn't want to have the responsibility of my emotions or my feelings because he knew I was an end goal for him, Like he knew he didn't want to stay with me long term.
But I was good enough, Like I was good enough for that point in his life, and what he was after it right then and there, and it wasn't what I wanted. And that's the thing that I think sometimes you need to stop and reflect on if you find yourselves in these never ending relationships where you're not actually flipping it into a relationship, it's not actually turning into anything. And that is are you, by having this situationship, stopping
yourself from actually having the type of relationship that you want. Laura, That's a really important point to drive home what you just said about you knew deep down basically that you weren't end golf for him, but you thought you could change him. And you thought if you're hung in there long enough and projected what you wanted onto him, he would change. I think it's so common, and I did that for almost two years. I had this situationship in Sydney.
I've spoken about him before, if you guys are longtime listeners, I've spoken about the guy that basically I went to New York for I did this really romantic gesture, tried to win him back because he had strung me along in a situationship for many years. I became I started that thinking I can do this too. You're going to be casual for me. Also, while I look for my penguin, you'll be my side penguin.
And he actually became my emperor penguin.
I was so obsessed with this guy, and I was like, this is the guy I'm going to marry. It was like we're in a relationship. Met each other's friends, I mean, his family. I was born online him said I loved him. I loved him, and he didn't love me, and he would keep he kept saying you're not the one, and I would stay and stay and stay. We went to dinner, like you guys, we're in a relationship without being in a relationship. To the point that I was so convinced
I went to New York. I mean I was convinced because he said, come to New York. He said, he said, I've made a horrible I've made a grave error. Brittany, like you're the one for me. I flew to New York thinking he's my emperor penguin. He was like, mah, changed my mind and left. My point of this is I should have listened to him the whole time. The whole time he was saying to me, like, I'm not.
Going to change.
But like every woman out there, you can to be the exception. You convince yourself you are the exception. You're like, I know he says that, but I will change him. And I think it's really important for women to get to a point where we have to actually maybe listen to their advice and listen to the things they're telling us and physically showing us if they are telling you, if they're actions.
This is really important.
If their actions are all over you and you feel so loved when you're with them, and the sex is amazing. But they're literally saying to you, I don't want anything. You have to disregard the physical connection, and you have to listen to what they're saying because the physical connection it's always going to be there. It's sex. They're men.
You need to listen.
If they say to you you're not the one, you have to bite the bullet and accept that he's not going to change.
And that's when you really need to assess what is good for you.
Are you actually really happy being in this situationship or are you telling yourself you're happy in it because you are scared to lose that person.
Actually, Britt, that's such a good point. And I was listening to when we were doing some research for this episode. There is this guy from the States, and I love his stuff. His name is Matthew Hussey. He's a relationship expert. I love it and I love him. I recommend him guys. He's got his own podcast. It's called Love Life with
Matthew Hussey. He explains that even though you might kind of convince yourself that it's something casual as in as in like, oh, we're just seeing what happens, by definition, your relationship is not casual. If if one of you ends it, you're going to be hurt. That's not casual.
You're emotionally invested in that. In which case, if you are emotionally invested to a point where if it ends, you're going to be really heartbroken upset, then you have to address the elephant in that room, and that is what is this? What the hell is this? And where is it going? Because you can't sort of sit in this indefinite ambiguity because you're fearful of them saying they don't want to be with you, because that's not going
to change anyway. So if you're just allowing this situation to kind of continue and to carry on the way it is without defining are we boyfriend? Are we girlfriend? Are we in a relationship? Because you're so scared that they're going to walk away from you, you don't have them anyway.
I totally get that. I have been in that situation before where I've known the answer. I know what he's gonna say, and that's why I don't ask, because I'm not ready to stop seeing them, Like I know that he's gonna say, you're not my person, So I just don't approach it because I think, well, I'm not ready to lose you.
Yeah, I'm not ready to not see you yet, so you're sitting it.
But ultimately I think it comes with age and emotional maturity. You get to a point where you know it's easier to cut it, and you know the better thing for you to do is if you are really wondering and pondering and thinking that question, what are we? It's so much better to ask and get the honest answer than it is to bury it and sit in that situation that's not right for you, that's gonna hurt you even more down the track.
But also, I think when we speak about this idea of like the fear that it's attached with having these conversations, it's not only are people afraid to sort of say, you know, what is this like? Do you want to be with me? And then the fear of rejection from that person. It's almost like we build them up to be something so much more important and amazing that what they are with you. We think, oh, but maybe I'll never find something better than this, or maybe this is
better than nothing. Maybe having this person who shows me affection even though they don't really want me is better than being on my own. That all feeds into this fear that you think you're going to be on your own forever. But unless you open up your life and your space to meeting someone new, if you're in a casual relationship but you're emotionally investing all of your time and energy into it, you're never going to meet someone new anyway. I recently had a girl that I know.
She wrote into the podcast, and I've known her for a very long time. She has said to me, I have been in a toxic relationship for two years, like this guy sponges off her. She has an amazing job, she owns her own house, and she's under thirty. She's done very well for herself. He does nothing, he lives
off her. She pays for everything. She's always been the person to monkey branch like relationship to relationship, and she was too scared to end it with him because she was in a situation where she's like, it's better than nothing. She's been this into our podcast and she literally wrote in and she said you thank you girls, because you gave me the strength to leave this situationship. She's like, I was in one hundred percent in a relationship that was just I was just too scared to be on
my own. So I don't think I told you that, Laura. She wrote in, and it was the same, thank you girls for.
All and you get so many of you guys write in saying that that these episodes have touched you in different ways. And I had a similar conversation on the weekend with someone who was saying that they got something out of one of our toxic relationship conversations, and I was like, sometimes it's really exposing for us to put all of our life and all of our past, like
terrible dating experiences out there and be fully exposed. But we do this because we have lived it, and we have made these mistakes and we have dated some absolute fucking doozies. We need to make I need to make a burn book and just say we'll put that on the Facebook group. Now I have dated some absolute doozies, and so this like, this understanding, what we're talking about comes from the life experience of two people who have dated for very long time time. And so if we can give you this.
Informally emphasize the very long time, but if we can give this out there and it helps someone when they're at a pivotal fork in the road in their relationship to make a better decision and to get out of something that's not fulfilling and doesn't give them the relationship that they want, then that's exactly why we're doing this.
And that was why we did it. So having people you write in and say that's absolutely brilliant.
Oh man, it warms the cockles of me. Old huh, No, that is the two glasses of wine, you know, that's also pretty warming. Just to get back onto the topic of situationships, one thing that I really want to drive home is that the concept of this is that they're supposed to be casual. If you find that you are investing too much of your time, of your emotions, too much of you into something and you're not getting anything back from it, as in it's not going to be
long term. You can't see this person in your future in a year's time, two years time, six months time, then I think you really need to ask yourself like, why the hell are you doing that? Because there are so many other things that are not just relationship, that are like your friends, your family, your work, read a
bloody book, learn about politics. There are so many other things that you could be doing that are much better use of your time than investing in someone who's not going to be there in six months or twelve months time, and who whose lack of emotional commitment to you, and whose lack of any sort of commitment really apart from just physical affirmation, leaves you feeling rejected.
People in a relationship they make plans weeks, months, years in advance. You make plans because you know that each other are important, You know that each other in each other's lives. People that are in situationships, they are like, hey.
What are you doing tonight? And it's seven thirty on a Saturday, Yeah, am I seeing you tomorrow?
Because they're like eight pm whatever. Their friends just canceled on them. That's a situationship.
I this is like the biggest red flag for me when I go back to this guy who I dated for a year and like, he's not a bad guy. I don't have any hard feelings towards him. He's a really nice guy. He's got a great girlfriend. Now, Like they're very very happy, good on them, But I'm not very child Yeah yea motherfucker. I was like I was obviously not the girl for him. And he knew that. But I remember it being Anzac day. I had gone to the Anzac service at dawn in the morning, and
he also lives in Bondig. I knew he was going to it, but that night I hadn't slept at his house, so I was like, okay, well, i'll see you there. He was there. We were at the same service. I mean, the service in Bonne is huge. There's hundreds and hundreds of people. And he just didn't text me to tell me where he was and I was like, okay, that's weird.
And then as the day progressed, I was like, I'm gonna be at this pub and then I wouldn't hear back from him for like four hours, and he'd be like, oh, sorry, we're not there anymore. We're going here now. And he just dodged me the whole day, like fully dodged me, just fully blanked me. And how bad did you feel? Like shit, I felt like my boyfriend had just completely ghosted because he wasn't your boyfriend. And then I realized
it didn't have a boyfriend. The point of the whole story exactly, and the point is you thought he was your boyfriend. You felt like he was your boyfriend. I felt like he was my boyfriend because he physically had made me feel like that. But ver he had said, I don't want anything. I'm not committed to you, And then I was angry at him. I was like, why didn't you want to hang out with me? And he said he was like, I don't. I don't get much time to hang out with my mates. I'm working a lot.
I see you so many nights a week. I wanted to just hang out with the boys. You're being crazy. And I was being crazy because he had said it time and time again what he wanted, but I was the one that was pushing it to be something else. And I was the one who was like, well, but your your actions say something different. Your actions say something different. But he was saying point blank to me, I don't want to date you. I don't want to date you. And I was like, you know that.
That reminds me of my of my story with my situationship this guy two years deep, right, he invites me to his thirtieth birthday party. Okay, why invite me? I've met your family, you know how I feel about you, you know what I've wanted.
He couldn't. He could never let me go right. He'd be like, it's not you, it's not you. I'd be like, great, I'm gonna move on there.
Don't contact me three days later, can't something about you made a mistake come back. This was two years He invites me to his thirtieth birthday party and this was the breaking point for us. I come to his party. It was huge, it was a dress up. All his friends and family were there who I know. Obviously because I've been around for two years. I'm taking photos for him because he was getting drunk, so I'm like, you know, I'll take the photos for you. Had a great proper
camera taking photo the whole night. He is on the dance floor, looks over to me, makes eye contact with me, turns around and starts making out with this girl. It was It was the biggest stab in the heart, the biggest fuck you I've ever seen is so uncalled for came for nowhere and that was him driving home.
Brittany, this is a situation and you were like, I will stay challenge accepted. Strap me in, Scottie. I'm gonna win this fucking race. Red flag after red flag after red flag. But that guy is not a guy that you should have given a second thought to. No, but we know how my brain works. But also, when you really want something, you forgive a lot of bad behavior. And when you have convinced yourself that something is right for you, and you've convinced yourself that that's the person
you're meant to be. With the level of shit that a lot of people will forgive and go back for more, it's almost like you become a glutt for punishment. And something I want to touch on just which is a little bit left ascent to what we've just been talking about. But maybe you are not the person that's like pushing this to be a relationship. Maybe it's the person you're dating. Maybe you're the one who's been verbalizing actually, you know what, like, ah,
this is casual. We're both cool, we're both fine. Like I'm not here and I'm not going to sit here and shit on this idea of having casual relationships because I've had them and I think that they can be totally fine, and they are instances where both people are consentually having a casual relationship in which point, like in case Happy Days, they can be brilliant, absolutely amazed as
a time and place, amazing time and place. But if you know for certain that the person that you are seeing every couple of nights, hang and bang with, that they emotionally are invested in you, and that they are going to be hurt when this ends, and you're just using them as like a ten and a way of getting like a little bit of a fix because they make you feel good, I really think you need to kind of stop and think, like, it's not okay to use people as emotional band aids, and it's not okay
to use other humans as emotional crutches. So if you are doing that to someone at the moment, really stop and think about why you're doing it, about what you get out of it, and about how you're potentially going to damage someone when you leave. So if you know for fact that it's not what you want and your isolation situationship has just been a temporary thing, then maybe now is the time to start putting some distance between it and making, you know, really defining what that is.
Because even if you've said it verbally said I don't want a relationship, if you're behaving like you want a relationship, then you need to take some responsibility when you hurt that person. See, I don't know about that, because I love when we do this.
I think if they've been really honest with you and said, like, this is not going to go anywhere, like I'm not looking for that, but I love spending time with you, they've putted their cards on the they have told you what they want. Because I think you can still form you can when hey, this is what I think. Don't
get me wrong. Situationships have a time and a place, but I think you can like deeply care and have feelings with someone and love someone and want to be with them and love spending time with them knowing they're not the one. I think you can absolutely do that, and I think that's what people get trapped in a lot of the time. That's what a situationship is. You know they're not your end goal, but you still adore them.
You have fun and you have a connection, you have sexual chemistry, but you just know they're not the one. That's where I think it's okay as long as you have blatantly said to them, this will never go anywhere. But I adore spending time with you. I think where it gets really sticky and tricky is when they come back to you saying I love you and I want more. That's when you may need to take a bit of a moral high ground, I think, and take some responsibility.
If they have confessed their love and that's that's all they want, you need to be a bit okay. I love having sex with you, I love spending time with you, but you're way more invested in this and I need to be a mature person here.
And cut it. That's where it differs for me. Well, that is exactly what I mean. And and but I don't think it needs to go so far as the person coming and saying I'm in love with you. I think if you know deep down that the person you're in a situationship really wants a relationship out of you, and that's that's what they're hoping for, and that's what they're invested in, and you know that, but your actions
are leading them on. It does come a point where, like as much as you might have said you don't want something, if your behavior is lending itself to them thinking that you're going to change your mind, If your behavior is making them think that they're in a relationship, you know, and it's almost a relationship. If they just wait a bit longer or hang on a bit longer, then I really think that that's misleading, and I think that that's unfair. It's borderline selfish, isn't it.
It's so selfish once you're to the point that you know they're way deeper than you are ever going to be. They want way more than you were ever going to want. It's selfish.
You're doing it just for you and for instant gratification, and I think that you need to take a bit more responsible. I'm not Guys are not the only ones to do this, like, I mean, obviously girls do. Girls do it too. I mean, I've done it to guys, and I say this, and I don't say this because I'm like judging people who are in this situation right now. I have done it to guys, and then I have had to be like, oh, look, I don't want to be with you. You know you're crazy that you thought
this was going to end in a relationship. They're not crazy. I made them think that it could have been in a relationship. I made them feel loved. I like use them for an emotional crutch, and that in itself is unfair.
As well. So I think you know, with age and with experience and with understanding about how we have to be responsible for other people's feelings, like that has from an introspective place made me go, Okay, I can identify that that people do this, and that I have done it in the past, and that it's just not a good way to treat people.
I stand by this wholeheartedly. If you want to see someone, speak to someone or be with someone, it doesn't matter how busy you are. You will absolutely find the time. They will absolutely find the time. So if you're sitting at home wondering why he hasn't texted you back, why he can't make time for you in his Wii, it's probably because he just doesn't want it badly enough.
Oh yeah, Like I mean, people are busy, sure, but you always make time for the people that are your priority. Obama has a wife, Come on, Like, if Obama can have a wife and a relationship in like several kids, then the guy that you're dating who's super busy can also have a relationship. It's just people prioritize what they want when they want it, and I think we like to overcomplicate things because we want to think that we're the exception. But if someone's saying that they're too busy
for relationship, they're not too busy for relationship. They just don't want to be with you that much. And we have to kind of sometimes step back and go, oh, that's what they mean by that. Guys are simple. They're simple creatures, especially, And I know I'm saying guys specifically,
but I really think that they're not being cryptic. They say exactly, They say exactly what they feel, and like we've said, they don't get so caught up in the intensity of the connection of the physical side of things, because that might be amazing, But if they're verbally saying what they want, then that is what you have to go off. I feel like we're sounding really blunt, but I wish someone told me this in the past. Okay, so you've.
Established you're in a situationship. You're either cool with it or you're not. But I think regardless, it's important to set some boundaries. So are you going to talk to each other about seeing other people? Are you going to talk about if you sleep with someone else? How open are you going to be? I think it's really important to set the tone straight away. It's almost like an open relationship, isn't it what's acceptable and what's not with
you too? What is valid jealousy, what is something that they've done wrong? You need to establish that or it's going to be toxic and go downhill rapidly.
But I think you also need to do that just from like a safety perspective as well, Like you want to know if the person you're sleeping with and seeing a couple of nights a week is also sleeping with other people. And I mean, yes, that information might hurt you to find out, but that ambiguity can hurt you a lot more. And I think it really ties back into what we already said about this fear of them saying something that you don't want to hear. That is so true.
Regardless of if it's a casual situationship or a relationship, you need to know.
It doesn't really matter what it is.
You need clarification, You need a boundary so that you aren't anxious, you aren't working yourself into a fit. How many times have you guys said to yourself or said to a friend, I don't know if I can I don't know if I can ask him if he've seen someone else.
I don't know. I don't know is what he did wrong. I have said that to you. I've said it to you before, I've said to heaps of people before. I've said he did this, But.
I don't know is that classified as wrong in what we're doing? The fact I didn't know I should have been asking him.
So here's an interesting question. So at how many weeks in, how many dates in? Like, at what point is it acceptable to kind of reach out to someone and be like, what is this? Are we together? Are you my boy friend? Yeah? It's that's so hard. I actually have had trouble with that forever.
It comes when you were seeing each other multiple times a week, when you've started to integrate into each other's life, like maybe you've met his friends or family, maybe he has met yours, You've you've had public displays of affection. I think things like that, that's when you can and say, well, hang on, are you doing this with anyone else? Or
are you just doing this with me? When you're sleeping together multiple times a week, you are one hundred percent entitled to know if he's sleeping with someone else.
I don't think that there's anything wrong, especially if you do want a relationship and you are after something more serious. There's nothing wrong with having conversation pretty early on in seeing someone and being like, oh, like, I'm looking for
a relationship. Doesn't have to be I'm looking for relationship with you, just I'm looking for a relationship, because then yeah, yeah, then you've defined what you're after, and I think it gives that person an easy early opening to say oh, I'm not looking for a relationship or oh okay, yeah I am too. Like they need to respond to that with something, and their response to that early on is going to give you a pretty clear indication as to whether or not this is going to eventuate into something.
Be open, be clear with your intentions.
You are completely entitled to know where you stand in a relationship where you stand with someone, and they are.
Entitled to know what you want.
Also, if you guys are in a situationship and you're loving it and you don't want more and you just want sex, you just want casual, you don't don't really mind what else they're doing. Brilliant girlfriend, Happy days, Happy days. There's a time and a place and it can be absolutely amazing. And enjoy that time because you might never have it again.
Yeah, And I don't want people to think that we're here saying that they're always bad, because there's definitely been times in our lives where we've had very, very amazing, consensual, casual relationships that have ended well, and you know, they don't always end terribly and someone doesn't always have to be hurt out of this. It's part of the journey.
Every single relationship of any kind that you have is going to teach you something and is going to project you to where you're meant to be. But contradictory to that, if you're in a situationship where you know you want more and you know you're not happy with it, and you know deep down that you are catching feelings and they're not you need to find a way to overcome that.
Whether that's either asking for more and being absolutely upfront and honest regardless of what the answer is going to be, or being brave enough to walk away knowing you're not going to be fulfilled in that relationship. It's so important to find out the answer regardless Amen Emotional Health, Ladies, emotional health.
You know that we never finished an episode without our Suck and our Sweet, which is basically just our highlights and our low lights of the week. Isn't it just suck and sweet, as in like suck of a lemon? No, suck of a lemon and sweet of an orange?
Is that what I know? It's just like suck is shitty and sweet's young? Are you reading too much into it? No?
When we're in the batch house, Alice came up with suck and sweet. But it was like, we call it lemons and oranges, same thing. It's just that we always called it suck and sweet. But yes, Laura, still trying to reinvent the wil Laura, you're just suck and sweet? Do you have one? You're like, still making this so fucking hard. Just tell me your highlight and your low light?
Woman?
Okay, am I studying my low light? I always began Now do you not know the rules? We've been doing this for like a year.
Yes, you always start with a low light because you want to finish on a high Okay.
So I got booked by a ranger down in BONDI I was running around, No, I was I was walking buster just near the promenade, and I didn't have him on a lead because he was really, really tired guy. If you don't know, I have a three legged dog. He has no leg, like he has his leg amputated from the shoulder and he's sort of gallops. Yeah, he's a really big dog. He's like a cross between a bull Mastiff and a great Day But he's very, very,
very soft natured. He's the biggest baby sweetheart. And never ever, ever, have I ever been booked by a ranger because usually brainers are like, oh, your dog is quite clearly disabled and he finds it really hard to walk on a lead because after a little while he gets super tired and he gets pulled to the side where he doesn't have a leg. Anyway, this ranger came up and he this is it, Brittany. He pretend kind of like he
was going to patbuster, and instead he patted him. Was like, oh, nice dog, and then he scanned his microchip with the little scanny thing that he carries around him. I was like, you are an evil man. Oh my god, it was evil. It was evil.
That is disgraceful. I know, Like, if you're gonna book me, just straight up say you're gonna book that.
I was like, my dog is disabled. Don't fake affection. Like this is there are so many levels of this and I'm not okay with and anyway, And then I started to get real crazy on the promenade. I was like, I would like to know your name and your details. And look, I know there's gonna be some people who listen to his podcast and they're like, it's the law. I understand, it's the law. I sometimes rules are meant to be broken people. I was like, I want your name.
I'm calling the main ranger guy. We ended up getting off with a warning. There's a lot of conflicting information out there about three legged dogs and leads and whatnot. Is there any information about like a dog and there's not. I was like, the laws do not accommodate for my disabled dog. I got very theatrical on his ass, and so he yeah, he didn't find me. After all. We got given a warning, so you don't do it again. I could never do it again. He's poor Buster. It's
lead time for the busty boy bloody power Rangers. There you go. So that was my suck. My sweet is a recommendation that I actually said a couple of weeks ago, which was magic. Fergus is a friend of mine. And Matt's he does this like live Zoom magic show, and we did it the other day for our staff. So basically we had like a like all of our staff
at Tony May. The shop has been closed. I haven't seen any of the girls in weeks now, and so we did a Zoom staff meeting on a Friday night and it's his little magic show and it was so cute. Did they love it? They loved it. Did he do different tricks? He did the same tricks, but obviously like different people were choosing different cards and things. And I still can't figure out how he does it. He's that good. He's amazing. So we had some of you listeners.
Actually writing saying that you hired Fergus and you had his show and you loved it.
So I think that's great.
You actually listen to our recommendations you're loving them equally.
I think that's brilliant. What is your suck? My suck?
This week, my nana took a real turn and within a day just had to go and get a pace maker put in. So that happens so quickly, like it really does just happen. So that was a bit of a I could kick up the butt. I think maybe to go and spend some more time with her and just really not take life for granted. I guess, but she's doing really well now and she's booked.
Herself into the hairdresser, so she's it's pretty good essential set.
I was like, Nan, I'm gonna come straight over and help you, like when is good for me to turn up? And she's like, well, i've got hairdresser this day and I've got this And I was like, oh, so you're doing pretty well. Like she's the recovery these days. The surgery is so brilliant. I take my hat off to them.
But also it's like such a reminder and it's I mean, it's horrible that this has happened, but it's such a reminder and such an awakening as well that during this whole pandemic, we are told that we have to isolate from the elder and we can't go and see our grandparents, and that they're the people who were most at risk, but they're also the people who were the most alone. And I think it's really important to try and like, at least if you can't go and see your grandparents,
like make sure you're calling them. There's so many people who were feeling very, very lonely and alone throughout all of this.
For sure, and a call goes a really long way, way further than you can ever imagine, my sweet So, remember a few weeks ago I told you that I couldn't find my fitbit.
I knew it was.
I hid my fitbit from myself because it was vibrating.
So sick of doing walks. I'm so sick of my step count.
I remember being asleep, like in this half slumber, and I must have been getting a message that was still linked to my fitbit so vibrated. I remember my fitbit being I could hear it vibrating through the night. I was like, this is so annoying. So I got up half asleep and put it somewhere that it wouldn't vibrate bit. Because I was only like semi conscious, I don't remember putting it where I put it. I've lost it and the battery has now died, so I can't find it.
So I was the other way. I was going through my drawers. I was like, maybe I just put it in my drawer, an underdrawer. I closed draw I.
Just like that.
You actually got up with like wouldn't you just take it off and throw it on the floor. No, it was already I wasn't wearing it.
It was it was like on my bedside table. So when it would vibrate, it's like, you know, it would make the noise on the table, and it just kept going. So I went and put it somewhere, and in my mind, I'm like, okay, I'm half asleep, but I would have put it somewhere soft that it wouldn't vibrate. So I started to go through my drawers. I was going through my underdrawer, did not find my fit bit found ten dollars. And it's not I'm not even making that up.
I don't know how.
I'm not even saying it like it sounds like a made up story. I found ten dollars in my undies. I don't know how it got there. I don't know who put it there, but I was like, brilliant, that is.
Your suite for the entire week. It's not even like one hundred dollars. It's ten dollars. It was tough times, and you don't only arrestipate ten dollars. You can't even use that money because no one's taking cash I'm aware. I tried. I was like Sherry copies on me the small I got there and they're like, we don't take cash.
I'm like, oh damn it. You're like, I'd rather find my fitbit. So I know how many steps I've done, I still can't find a fitbits. It's gonna be the mystery of twenty twenty.
Guys, thank you for listening to another episode of Life Uncut. Do you know what I just want to say last week's episode. I'm just going to throw another snare out last week's episode on gas lighting. If you haven't listened to it, it's a last episode, get it in your ears. It got such amazing feedback. I mean, I'm not surprised because there are a lot of people out there who've experienced it, and there are a lot of guys out there who do it. But I really mostly guys, though, yeah,
for sure most of guys. The studies, the studies have
proven it's mostly men. But honestly, it often just surprises me just how how much some of these topics head home for some of you, and how you find yourself in the same situations and can relate to the stuff that we're putting out and we feel so grateful that we're able to bring you this podcast, where feel so grateful that we're able to empower some of you to help to have the relationships or make changes in your life so that you can live the life and had
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So long. The property a democary airs.
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