Society... SCREW YOUR TIMELINE!

starting this record. We've been recording all day. We've done some back to back interviews as great as coming anyway, we are tired, af we get in there now, we're like, let's pick up the energy. Come on, let's bring it. Let's bring it, and we just probably the best intro we've ever done, Like I was ever and not exaggerating, guys, No, it was. We will never drop it. It was so good. And then we looked down and Laura's like, duper drip.

She just like, why is the thing fushy? And I was like, that's because, as the big exit says, you haven't put the record card in anyway, We're gonna start again. Hi, guys, I'm welcome back to another episode of Life un Cut. It's so great to be here, to be healthy and to be in front of a microphone again, and for me to not be mattie Ja that's also great. How do you feel about that? Do you just feel like a Matt cheated on you? B you had like hectic

fomo and you're like, I can never be sick again. Well, look, for anyone who doesn't know what we're talking about. Last episode, I have been the last week and a half, I have had the most killer flu from hell, and so Matt had to step in and be me basically on the last episode, which was very strange for multiple different reasons. One of them because before Britt and Matt actually started recording. So I'll explain this setup to you. So Prit comes

over to our lounge room. I'm sitting on the lounge in like a little sick cocoon in the corner, and the two of them set up on our dining room table to record, and then they start making jokes about how it's like I'm watching them have sex, like I'm watching them make a podcast together, and I'm that weird in the relationships. I sort of like we were cheating a little bit. Who wants to watch their partner have sex with their friend? And I was like, guys, this

has taken a very weird turn. I don't feel well. I'm not okay with this conversation. Let's bring it back to the podcast just a little bit. It was like Bride's Maids, you know where she's shitting in the street. She's like, don't look at me. I was like, Laura, stop looking at me. I was like, you look at me. You know what a dog does a pooh and they lock eye contact with you. That's what I felt like you were doing because you were just like I cycle

hawk at me the whole record. The thing that was so hard for me was that the whole time that they were talking, I just wanted to be a part of it. So every time they would say something or there would be some advice, I was like, oh, hey, guys,

how amo you add this? I have saved us up and accidentally unfiltered story which I'm gonna share with you because basically on the last episode, Britt was talking about how her tampon box floated down the street and how it very precariously ended up right next to a very hot guy. Yeah, it was my pick up line. Didn't work. Failed, miserably embarrassing situation, you know, not ideal, but also very funny for everybody listening. That literally sparked in me and

accidentally unfiltered. That happened to me so many years ago that I've suppressed in the deep dark corners of my heart and please let me tell my story. And we're like, no, this is not your turn, Laura. I like, go back to your couch, Laura, you're den okay. So I'm gonna

tell you this story. So I was at a nightclub many many moons ago, and there was this guy there who I had had the biggest crush on, like a real schoolgirl crush literally because I'd had a crush on him since I was in school and like he was from Wollongong, we grew up together. I was I'm sorry you said that, Like that was supposed to be romantic. He was from wo Like, oh my god, he's from the go Why didn't you lock him down? It was the pity of my romance at the time. So I

really had a massive crush on this guy. And I was at you know, the local nightclub called the glasshouse, and I was very drunk. Guys, just to set the scene. I was very very drunk, and he came up to me and I was like, Oh my god, this is it. It's gonna happen. Holy shit, this is my moment. This is my moment. So We're standing there and we're chatting, and I was like, this is going really well. Okay, I know him a bit drunk, but I think I'm

holding it together. And then I reach into my handbag whilst I'm locking eyes with him and swaying side to side and pull out my chapstick, my lip gloss, and I stand there holding my lip gloss about ten centimeters from my lips whilst I try and take the top of it. So I'm standing there chatting, trying to like, what the fuck is the top not coming off? I am drunk, anyway, keep the eye contact. He then looks at me and goes, what are you trying to do

with you? Tampon it? Me? I actually pitching you then trying to like seductively put it onto your lips like whilst locking eyes with him. That would have made my day. It was very very close. Needless to say, it just never worked out. With that guy. This story is better and better. Did you hook up with him? No? Maybe? God who knows, you don't remember? I was very memorable. But also, guys, I just want to say, like to the episode that Britain Matt did, it was a great episode.

We've had so many people write in on the Facebook group and on Instagram also, people felt the need to direct message me to tell me how great they thought that episode was, like ouch, and how much they loved having Matt on the pod. So we may have him on again in the future. However, I do just want to point out one thing. So after you left last night, Britt and all of Matt's wise wisdom had been shared,

something did happen recently? Like, obviously I've been sick. Matt has been running back and forth to the Chemist every day, and there's like lots of things that you can and can't take when you're pregnant, right, So there's been lots of Like I think one of the reasons why it's taking me so long to get over this sickness is because, like I literally can't take anything from the Chemist that's got anything active in it that actually works. I have to just ride it out, just ride it out. Anyway,

eventually they put me on any biotics. So I've been on anybodotics the last couple of days. And Matt makes his daily little venture into the pharmacist this one day and he's like, oh, you know, well, my fiance she's on antibiotics, Like, you know, what else should I take?

What should she take? And the pharmacist says, oh, like, you should take some probiotic because, like, as all women know, if you are on any biotics, then there's probably a really great chance that you're gonna get an awesome thing called thrush. And like, every single time I'm on any biotics, like it always happens, so I just like get it. I was like, cool, great, yes, probiotics awesome. So anyway, Matt's been taking the probiotics every day, morning and night.

I was like, that's so weird for him because he's not someone who takes any sort of vitamins or anything like that. And so I said to him last night, just after you'd left, Britt, babe, what is that made you want to take probiotics? And he was like, well, I don't want to get fucking sick, do I? But you, like, what for your gut health all and I was like, do you know what probiotics are for? And he was like, yeah,

I don't want to get the flu. And I was like, holy shit, you just gave thousands of women your wisdom and advice. And no. I was like, honey, read the back of the bottle and on the back it's like, can help alleviate symptoms of irritable boo gut problems thrush. And I was like, this was for me, this wasn't

for you, Dumbling. So what's happened is obviously the chemist has gone, yes, take this in terms of take this physically, take this home to your wife because she's on anyway, He's been like, oh, I should definitely take that so I don't get the flu or man thrush, which is I don't think he's a thing. I was like, here are my pregnancy supplements, Matt, would you like to take some? Folly also, So this this is the man that gave you all that wise advice this week. Love that I

felt like I needed to cut him back down. I think you've just done that, just in case you all thought he was going to start making a very regular appearance. No, you're stuck with me. I'm back. Just try and get a one up on me again. Man, dare you no? Actually, he messaged me today, Hey buddy, just checking in. Had some great response from the podcast episode. I think we give the people what they want. I think we do another episode. I'm thinking maybe we include a little bit

more football and fishing. Though, what are your thoughts? And I was like, yeah, I was like, I'm not even blind you No. I also like that he's messaging you this and I don't even know about it, trying to muscle his way in on the podcast fully, He's like, do you need a new business partner? Anyway, Guys, we have such a great episode for you today. We're sorry that we did have to do the switcheroo on you

and do ask guncut on Tuesday. But we are going to be talking about timelines and the social stigma that is attached to like you know, when do we get married, when do we have babies? Why is it that we feel so much pressure to achieve certain things by a certain point in our lives. And also we're gonna unpack like what is it if you're a little bit further down the track in your life, say in your thirties, and you decide that you want to have a big

career change, how do you go about that? Like, what are our thoughts and advice on it? Because both Brita and I have done that. Essentially, we just thought we'd have a conversation around why is it the timelines still seem like there's something that's so important. But before we do that, last week on the episode, guys, we did this segment at the start where we reached out to you and we wanted to know your best funniest, most

awkward and cringe worthy and lollworthy loller coaster. Some may say first, some might not say that, some would prefer that you never say that. Again, I haven't dropped that in a while. It's been the biggest Lola Derby of a dating story how that you have. But we did speak about all these funny, awkward first date Bumble stories last week and there were some funny ones and Laura and I had a field day reading them all. But

this week we're doing something a little bit different. We are so stoked we bring you today's episode in collaboration with our really good friends over at Bumble, and today we go when we're bringing you some really feel good and happy online dating success stories, because whilst it is so amazing to laugh at everyone else's misfortune and everyone has these awkward first dates, it's really important to know that there is actually a lot of success that comes

from online dating. I've had success from it, You've I mean, obviously I'm not married, I've had success in other ways. Maybe I just need tell you, like, how about we define what success is? Well, yes, but a lot of people have success. And the thing we want to really sort of stipulate in this conversation is what success means to different people, because success in love, success in dating is different from many many people. So we ask you, guys,

what are your bumble success stories? And we're going to read a few out. We did put a call out as well up on the Facebook page, and I was just absolutely amazed. We had one hundred and eighty six and like it's growing every day of people from the community writing about their different online dating success stories, and it was just amazing because I mean, often we tell

on this podcast all of the accidentally unfilm stories. We tell all of the most embarrassing stuff, and often that doesn't always end the best way for the person in the story. And ually for us, but it's really amazing to kind of sit back and sometimes go like wow, Like obviously for so many people it is a platform

that works. And I think that sometimes online dating gets such a bad rap because we're so quick to share all of our disaster dating stories and not really share all of the beautiful, wonderful success stories that come out of it as well. We've picked out a couple that we thought would be really nice to share with you. I just alone on my Instagram call out had hundreds of people writing in and it was I had to genuinely had a smile on my face reading the whole thing.

And I also I think now with twenty twenty and the way the world is, there has never been more of a time to be online dating because we don't go out like we used to. The pubs and clubs aren't open like we used to. So whilst bumble and online dating has always been around, it is now so more than ever because we had so many stories of people writing in saying we got to know each other for four months before we met because of COVID, which I think is so beautiful because there's no nothing physical

where you're getting to know each other. It's not just like meat and have sex. It's it's actually getting to know someone on a deeper level and having these conversations and anyway. I could go on about this forever, but let's get into the stories. I have a question for you before I read out this first one. If you went on a bumble date and the guy rocked up and he was significantly shorter than what he said he was, what would you do? Like significantly like a foot Okay,

so one of my unofficial rules. It's not a rule, but it's like what I look for. I want someone to be minimum. I sounded like Boston Powers, Mmjuandamellian Dallas, minimum my height or taller. I don't want to date someone smaller because I am quite tall and I wear heels. But if they're my penguin's probably not going to be the end of the world. If I turned up and my date was shorter than me, did he live about it?

What if he lied about it? I wouldn't leave. I'd go on the date with him, but I would be unimpressed that he lied for sure, because honest, he's key. So what happened? Some of this has obviously happened to some poor girl. So okay, we met four years ago online dating, and he proposed in our second anniversary I'm quite tall. So before we met I asked him how tall he was. He replied with the exact same height as me, to which I thought, great, this literally never happens.

Waiting out the front of the restaurant, I see a guy walking towards me that is a good foot shorter than me. His first words to me were, I'm sorry, I'm not a giraffe, but I really wanted to meet you. We joke about it all the time, and before we say our vows at our wedding, we're going to get a groomsman to run over with a step for him on No, hi really means nothing, but it's a fun

joke for the two of us. And then she wrote it turns out he was in year ten when I was in year seven at the same school, and he was my color house captain, which meant he gave all of our great carnival pep talks. I don't know, that's like some weird synchron city there at the end. I think I said that right. Basically, he was a couple of years older than her in school, as well, but he was still short in school. I'm gonna guess that I had this. I had this one that I'm just

gonna summarize. She's like, I don't know if this counts as Bumble success or not. She's like, I guess it does. We matched on Bumble. He was everything that she wanted. He was an absolute babe and she was obsessed. But then she'd been on a really bad date. She had a really bad day, and she cracked his ships and she deleted Bumble. She was like, I'm done, I'm done

with online dating, don't do it anymore. But then she remembered how hot the guy was that she'd matched, so she went back onto Bumble, but thinking her matches would be there, but they weren't. They were all gone because it like started again. But she remembered where he worked because he had a picture of him working just like

he was a barista. So she went to his cafe and many organically and tried to like meet him on them, and then they started dating, and then down the track she's like, lol, I actually met you on Bumble, like so it went right back. So she sort of storked him.

So did that classify his success. I'm going to say that that's a success story except for the fact that like that is like an aid grade stalker story as well, which is so great because I feel like if you said that out loud and actually told a guy that you've done that, you would be put straight into the crazy basket. Okay, I've actually done this. Let me tell you hence why you live in the crazy basket, Brandy. Okay, you guys have probably often heard of me talk throughout

the podcast. Throughout the last year. I've always spoken about this one guy where I always say he's like my best friend. I met him on Bumble probably six years ago. We spent like max five days together and that was it. He moved back to America. That was it. We've been like best friends ever since. It sounds really weird because we don't see each other. It just started to develop we will, like have this soul connection and just started

to develop online. So we just stayed in contact. If you guys are thinking that this sounds strange, don't worry. Like every time Britt tries to explain it to Matt and I, we're also like, so, wait, you banged you got on super well, you still think he's the hottest guy ever. But yet then new friend zoned each other. Don't understand it, but cool. So, No, we didn't friendszone each other. If he was in my within myself, if he was here, we would have been dating. But he

lived in America and he went back to America. But we were just still so obsessed with each other and we wanted to keep getting to know each other. And then it's been literally five six seven years maybe and we have seen each other a total of he came back, when saw each other for two more days. That's it. He's got a girlfriend, he's got a relation, he's in a relationship. He's really happy. He's the only person I told I was going on a bachelor Like. We trust

each other. It's the weirdest relationship ever, but it's just a friendship. Anyway. I saw him on Bumble and I was like, who the hell is this guy? He was like he had the story that got me. He was like walking down a football field and he was like looking back and he had a dog. He had no shirt on and he had this really cute dog. And I was like signed, sealed, delivered, I'm yours. We didn't match. I like to think how I just wasn't in his radius.

But same thing as changing Tatum. Again, we didn't match, but he had linked these he had linked, not linked, but he had pictures that you can see where a tag is, and I could find I did. I went stalking, all right. I stalked and found some photos on on Instagram or on his Facebook. It wasn't even Instagram, it was Facebook. You're getting crazy by the second. So I found him on Facebook and I DMed him and said, I said, hey, this is something I remember what I said.

And I said, hey, this is not something I ever thought i'd say. But I saw you on Bumble. We didn't match, so I found you. My wow. Then he wrote back straight away and he's because you know what, I'm like, I'm so yolo. I'm like, what have I got to lose my dignity besides respect and dignity? He wrote back straight away and he's like, I definitely did not see you on Bumble or I would have swiped right. And we got chatting and then literally we hooked up

for a week straight and it was incredible. And then six seven years later, we're still like the best of friends. So I think that is in its own. We're not married, No, we're not together. No, but it's a success story because I developed a great friendship from it, and to me this is still defined as a type of bumble success story. But also I think that, like one, this reinforces that semi stalker behavior is fine. Can I can be a little bit cute, you're a bit crazy, Like that's kind

of cute too, don't worry. Depends what level you're at, like mine was pretty low keys, is yours is next level? Mine's low key level. Like what if you like show up at his work and then about showing up in his house, That says, no, that's a stalker. But this girl, all she did was knew she knew where he worked, so she just went and made it happen naturally. I think that was cute. I have a very similar story.

So one of my girlfriends actually, so she was online dating and she had matched with this guy who she really liked and she thought he was a total hottie. And then I don't know how she did it, but she accidentally unmatched him, like whether she had her phone unlocked and then she fumbled around and she unmatched him.

But he didn't have his Instagram linked and they had only been chatting that day, so they hadn't really gotten to the point where they had exchanged anything more than just the pleasantries of like, you know, initial like oh you look like a bit of all right anyway, then she uninstalls Bumble and spends the next three days swining the whole entire area, the whole of Sydney, all of Sydney, until she rematched with him and then dated him for six months. And that is some dedication to the cause,

you see. That's not I respect that, that's not no, I respect hard work and dedication, and that's what she did. Like maybe she had to go on for a premium subscription. I mean, I talk about my sister Sherry all the time. She's five and a half years deep into her relationship with her Scottish guide that we met when traveling, and that was online. They're gonna get married, they're gonna be happily of after he lives here in Australia. And that

was literally just from online dating. And so I've seen firsthand a that there are good people on there and b that people do get their happy endings. Well. One of the things that I think as well which I find really interesting, is like we put so much pressure on relationships being successes only if they work out right, Like we're like, well that was a failure because we're not together anymore, like fuck another one bites the dust kind of thing. And there's this mentality towards dating. If

they're not the one, then it's a failure. One thing that I've learned, especially from during this podcast and something that I really really believe in now, it's like what real friendships are. Thanks I look back on all of my dating experiences, like every single guy that I dated from online, every single guy that I met in the wild and dated. I look back on those experiences and think that those relationships essentially were successful because I learned

something from them. I learned what I don't want in a partner, I learned what I deserve. I learned like a greater level of respect for myself. So and I know that that's a very like idealistic way of looking at dating and relationships. And definitely when you're in the throes are going like another one that didn't work out, it's sometimes hard to go, oh, well this is going to be a nice life lesson in the back, But it's like I've had enough those lives. I found bloody,

I'm as wise as there is. I think I look back on those times in my life now and I can see that every single one of those relationships had purpose and I learned something from them, and I learned like a greater level of respect for myself as well. Yeah. Absolutely. We had this other girl writing and I thought this was really really sweet. She said, does it have to be romantic success because I have a different success. I moved to a new city completely on my own early

this year. I literally didn't know a soul, but I have found five new, incredible best friends from bumble We actually had someone ask on the Facebook group about things like bubble bff and like, I I think, you know, it's amazing that there are these opportunities that you can expand your networks and make new friends and like even with like the life on cut community and the fact that people are doing meetups now and the fact that

people are actually forming genuine friendships from an online platform, It's something that's really special. It's amazing, and that's the whole purpose of like bubble bff as well. If you have gone to a new place it's the same thing. I don't see why it's different to any other platform or going and studying a new hobby. Literally, you're going to meet people that are in the same position as you. Comes up so often and ask on cut questions. How do you make friends as an adult? It's so hard.

But I'm not kidding, guys. I reckon. I had two to three hundred people writing in saying they're married, they've got kids, they're engaged, or from Bumble. So congrat to you. We're always talking about the most embarrassing stories, and we've been doing some work with Bumble and they're one of our sponsors and one of our partners, and it really is amazing to be able to reach out to you guys and to hear some of the beautiful success stories that come out of online dating as well. Yeah, you

made me want to keep doing it. You were never gonna stop? No I do. I periodically deleted, then I come back. All right, guys, Before we get into the meaty topic of today, I just want to bring one accidentally unfiltered. And I don't know about you, Laura, but I actually feel like we haven't done this in ages. We haven't done this in ages. But also it's only

been a week. Yeah, but a week of not seeing each other and recording feels like forever because we spend our entire life in front of this microphone or emailing or messaging or voice messaging or dming or But I really liked that, like our work consists of like telling other people's embarrassing stories, Like that's actually worked for us and it's great. I wouldn't want to change a thing. Okay, so this one has this sort of to do with you, actually,

oh dear. The other day, when listening to Laura's story about how she wakes up having orgasms, I was dying of laughter because I thought I was the only one who did this and that I was a total freak. And I've never spoken about it to anyone. Now, girlfriend,

the safety and numbers, don't you worry. As soon as I heard it, I was so excited that I went straight over to your Instagram and replied to your story Instagram DM and your poll saying exactly this, that I am a sleep orgasmer, that I orgasm all the time. Then yesterday, in a marketing meeting, my boss brought up to the whole table about how he wants us to

know that he reads our DMS. He gave me a look, and I didn't think twice about the look until I just looked at our messages from over the weekend and I saw that. In fact, I replied to your DMS and your poll from my work account, And now I know what the look was about, because my boss knows that I wake up frequently having big, sexy, juicy orgasms. Oh mate, he's just jealous. Don't worry. She was so excited.

She just went to town telling us her stories. And as it was in a boss's account, I'm like dead and then she's like deceased, love you by it? Oh wow. I just want to say, as much as that's an unfortunate thing that happened, God, you're lucky that you can have an orgasm in your sleep, because apparently only twenty percent of people orgasm in their sleep. And I think we're the lucky ones. We had so many people right in saying actually that they are sleep orgasmers. It's the

I was shocked. No, but I was shocked because I didn't I genuinely didn't know. Even my sister Sherry, sorry, she she was like, don't you do that, and I was like, we've got the same genetics. I was like, how are you doing this? It's the most minimal effort for such high reward. I highly recommend. I mean, actually, I did have one person right to me that was like after you guys talked about it on the podcast, I had my very first one. So maybe it was

like front of mind for her. So, guys, you know what they say manifest if you want to have a sleep orgasm tonight, you know what you've got to do. Well, she literally running your mind, and really think about that. Focus in your goals, focus on your orgasm. So, guys, today's episode is on this idea of the pressure society puts on us for timelines, how we're supposed to get

things done when we're supposed to get them done. And I feel like as a society, we're always in a rush to get somewhere, to accomplish something, to do something, whether that's finishing school, graduating university, buying a house, having children by the age of thirty. But you can't have your children by the age of thirty until you're married, because that's the order. It's like married at twenty six, kids at thirty or a first kid at thirty. Make

sure you have your house deposit sorted as well. The pressure that society puts on us to we live a certain way. It's just what you do. You go to school and you finish it, and then you go to union, and then you graduate, then you get your job. And we today you wanted to sort of discuss that and break that down and give you guys another perspective on it.

That your timeline is completely individual. Your timeline is dependent on who you are, your goals, where you want to be, and it has nothing to do with any other outside pressure. So we want to talk about that. Then we want to talk about the idea of maybe your timeline isn't what society wants, and maybe you hit thirty, maybe you hit thirty five, maybe hit forty, and all of a sudden, you think, I'm not happy where I am. I want to try something new. I want to go and chase

my dream. Finally, I don't want to send forty years in this job that I detest. So we're going to talk about the idea of reinventing yourself and starting something new. One of the reasons why we wanted to do this is because, like both britt and I we feel really really passionate about the fact that, like life doesn't have

to follow a timeline. And you know, I myself, I guess I never even really knew if I wanted to have children before I met Matt, And that was always something that kind of came up in conversation, and it was always a question of mine. I was like, you know, do I not want to have kids because I haven't met the right person, or is it because I genuinely

in me don't feel very maternal. And anyone who actually watched Matt and Mine's season of The Bachelor, which this has gone back a bit now, but we had a date that was at a daycare and we had to run around after other people's children, and I was standing there going, I don't really care, like kind of want to not get in the spot, like this is not

my idea of a date. And for me, like, you know, I'm very very close to like my friend's children's and like my sister's baby, and like you know, my nieces and nephews and all lots of stuff, But I don't really get excited about other people's kids. You know, that's not a natural thing for me. And I mean, I hope that there's other people out there who relate to that.

I know that some women just naturally feel super maternal, but I have never felt that, and so so I kind of always attributed that to maybe I didn't want to have kids. I wasn't sure, but obviously for Matt that was something that was so important to him, and then when I got into the right relationship with him, it was exactly what I wanted. Like there's never ever been a second since I've had Mali where I've thought, you know, or like did I not want to have kids?

Like do I don't know? Any of that? All of that doubt sort of slipped away. But for a really long time, like I was really conscious of like this idea of a timeline, this idea of like do I need to get married? When do I need to settle down? And I think, you know, Matt and I have done it in such a roundabout way and such a mixed up way, in a way that for a while I didn't feel comfortable talking about because I thought that people would have their own opinions or that'd had their own

judgment on how we were living our life. Well, let's wind it back a little bit because I just find it so interesting. Let's go back to when we were I don't know, let's say eighteen, Like when you were seventeen eighteen, when you're thinking, if you're wrapping up school and all of a sudden you're like, okay, I've got

to go and plan my life a little bit. When you projected and when you looked your life ahead and maybe just say thirty years, what did the timeline look for you, and what did you think you were going to be doing and achieving and what did you want? Because I know that for my timeline, what I wanted and what I thought that happened is very bloody different. It is very out of whack. Guys, my timeline is still very out of whack I personally. So I finished

school at seventeen. I met the man who I thought I was going to marry at eighteen. I was convinced, absolutely convinced that he was the one for me. So in my timeline in my head, I was like, well, we'll be married by the time I'm twenty six, we will have babies by the time I'm thirty one, and I was like, well, live in Sydney. I didn't really have a big grand plan for where I was going to be or what I was going to be doing.

But in regards to like work and career, I kind of always thought I was going to be an artist. I thought I was going to be a painter, and I was going to do that on the side of having like a graphic design job. That was my normal thing. I haven't seen you pained. I didn't actually know that you were like really into art. You've seen some of the paintings through in my house, the cockatoo. Nah, that one's very good. I didn't do that one. See. I probably have seen them and just thought it was art.

It was your art. Okay, So you didn't get married at twenty six, you didn't have your kid at thirty one, and you're not painting. I kind of want to jump forward to like my pregnancy journey and stuff with Marley, because for me, that was like the most significant timeline that was completely out of whack. I was single at thirty I was single at thirty one. I met Matt at thirty one and the relationship just clicked obviously, like you know, I knew that he was the one for me,

and then I haven't spoken about this super publicly. I've mentioned it briefly on the podcast before, but I've always been so worried about the stigma that's attached or people's perceptions, and I was worried that people would judge mine and Matt's relationships. So what I'm about to tell you basically, are you making it? I feel like it's so much

worse than it is. No, But like at the time, I was in embarrassed because I was like, people are going to see this as though, you know, our child wasn't planned and that and that for me, there was this stigma around something being not planned and therefore an association with it being unwanted, And I was like, Maley was never unwanted. She was always so wanted, but she wasn't planned, So there's a different There is a massive difference, and it worried me at the time that people wouldn't

see that. So I guess that that was something that I really wanted to kind of shy away from, especially when I was so excited about the fact that we're having a baby. Matt and I weren't living together when I found out I was pregnant the first time, so I was still living in Rushcata's Bay. Matt was living in Bondai with his two housemates, and I found out I was pregnant, and then, as you guys know, I had a miscarriage ten weeks later, but we weren't living together.

So for me, that was like, well, okay, that was not the plan. Anyway, we kind of relaxed our ideas around, you know, when we wanted to have kids and timelines and stuff, and we just I didn't go back on the pill, and we were like, well, we'll see what happens. So then I got pregnant again very shortly afterwards. We still weren't living together, like we lived in separate houses, and then that's when we moved in together. So we

moved in together. I moved into his house with his two housemates, and I did my entire pregnancy living with his two housemates. And I didn't want to talk about that publicly because I was so worried about like Daily Mail writing an article and people perceiving that as perceiving it as like a bit bogan. That was my worry.

I was like, I don't want people to think that I am, like, you know, I don't have my shit together or I haven't sorted my life out, and that here we are like having this kid that you know was unplanned, and then therefore people might think it was unwanted, which was obviously my fear. Now I look back on that time, and I'm like, why do I fucking care so much what people think? Because I loved that pregnancy and living with Matt's housemates. I had so much fun.

I had so much support around me as well, like living with people who I loved and I got along with, and they were such good friends. I moved out, so Matt and I moved out together. We got our own place about three months before Marley was born, or two months before Mary was born. However, that wasn't in the country, so I physically moved our entire apartment myself. When I

was a month pregnant. Oh. I remember saying, I'm gonna come and help you, and you were like, I remember You've been like, it's not going to be that bad. I was like, oh my god, this chick has got no fucking idea, Like we got to removal. Usa'm sorry. I wasn't physically moving, but I was eight months pregnant. I set up our apartment Matt came home and that

was that was literally our first time living together. And so you know, Molly's now one and a half, we have one and a half year old baby, and we've lived together for one a half years and seven months.

Like if you've never lived together not pregnant, and we've never lived together not being parents, We've always been on our pregnancy journey from the time that we've lived together, which you know, if I look back when I was twenty and how I thought my life was going to plan out, Hell's no, I was going to live with a guy for four years, then we were going to travel, then we're going to have a baby. That just didn't turn out the way that I expected it would, but

I wouldn't change a single thing. I've loved every moment of this past year so much so I wanted to do it again. And so then you've got toged after you found out you're pregnant too, didn't you. Yeah, I got engaged when I was eight months pregnant, and once again there was this fear that people were going to think that we were only getting engaged because I was pregnant,

because you had your accidental baby. Yes, I think I've done a lot of work on myself to get to a point now where I don't really care about people's opinions of me, and like I really feel like, you know, I know who I am as a person. And that's something that we preach a lot on this podcast, is like you have to be really comfortable and confident in yourself. But there is still that little bit of I don't

want someone to think those negative thoughts of me. And so like when we got engaged, there was this little tiny voice in my head that was, well, are people going to think that we're only engaged now because I'm pregnant, and like it's not because we love each other, And that was my fear. But as humans, we as humans can you can preach it all you want to say. You know, you really have to not worry about what people think. And I'm a big advocate for that. I

think that you shouldn't worry about what people think. But as humans, it's normal to want to be liked and to want to be respected, and you don't want people to judge you and say bad things about you. So I think that that's such a normal thought to have that you're like if I announced this, ah all the trolls are going to come out, and you know, like I can't. I don't think you should judge yourself too

hardly on that one hundred percent. And I think also, like when I look back on it, it's this reality and like this pressure, like I didn't care. Personally, I am and have never been in such a healthy and happy place in my life, like I love where my life is at now, but socially, the stigma that was attached to what my life looked like when like, you know, the fancy bells and whistles of Instagram was kind of, you know, not there, and it was actually the real

logistics of my life at that point in time. I was so worried about what people would think. Not because I cared about where my life was at. I was super happy, but because there's this expectation that we follow a certain timeline. And I'm here to say the timeline doesn't fucking matter, it doesn't exist. The timeline exists in your own head. I cannot tell you how different my life is from the timeline that I had planned out. I finished school and I went traveling for the year

and moved to Italy. Because I was always on my agenda. I was always gonna have this year off before I really knuckled down and got into life. So I did that, came back and I studied. I always wanted to be in a healthcare so I studied radiation science. I always knew I wanted to be in a hospital environment, helping people, and I thought that that would be me forever. I was also in a relationship with someone for eight years

and I remember saying to him. I remember saying him, just so you know, I'm going to be a young mum. I know. It's funny now. He was a few years older than me, and we were so obsessed with each other, and he's he's like, oh yeah, what's young? And I was like, well, I just want I just want you to be prepared that like, this is what I want from our relationship, and this is what I want from me, because we were always going to spend our life together,

you know. And he said, well, what's young? And I said, I want to go to UNI finish and probably just get like two years work behind me, some savings, and then I want to start having kids at like actually I think I think, I said twenty four. I'm pretty sure, I said twenty four, and he was a few older than me, so he was like, there's no way you're gonna want kids at twenty four, and I'm like, hundred percent, that's what i want to do. I want to grow up.

I want my kids to be my friend. I want to be young and have energy, and then I want I want to be finished having kids by thirty. I thought I'd be done with my kids at thirty, and I also told him I wanted four kids, so that was gonna be busy six years. I also had this dream and was determined to I don't know, and this is the thing. I don't know why we put these presures on ourself. I think it's society. I said to myself that by the time I was thirty, I was

going to own three houses. That was my goal. Why who bloody knows. But all my friends were out partying, drinking, traveling. I was at home literally reading like finance books and investment books, and it was so strange. Bought my house, my first house, started to go down the timeline track, then went and got another mortgage for a second house because I was determined. I was like, I'm gonna have three houses at thirty about twenty four, went to get

my second loan to buy my second house. Now can you imagine on your own three mortgages? What was I thinking? Then? Thank God, I had this mid life crisis and just as I was going by his second is still not out of it for long. It's the longest midlife crisis you guys have it ever saying it's about eight years strong. There. It's a half life crisis. It's just going to continue on.

So it was a quarter life crisis to be fair, because I was young, had this crisis, was going by the second house and I just flipped instead of buying it. I didn't go through it. I flipped on everything I've ever done, sold the first house. My dreams of three houses were gone. And that's when I just took off overseas for threees. I was like my relationship ended. Everything was crumbling. I realized that I wasn't going to have the kids. I realized I wasn't going to have the

properties I wanted. So I just went for threes and like, blew off some steam, lot of steam, blow off, some steam came back and basically when I came back, it took me up to the level of the Bachelor. So here I am thinking I was going to be in medicine, owning all these houses, in love gauge, married with kids. I was single, no money, thirty on a reality dating show and going down what I didn't know at the

time was a whole nother career path. Now this is really scary, like when you get to an age of thirty and you realize that your life isn't anywhere where you thought it would be. And I was getting a lot of pressure from people in my family and friends and society, and like, why are you single? Why are you still traveling? You're never going to meet anyone traveling. How are you going to get ahead in your life if you're spending your money on things that you can't keep.

Whereas in my mind, I was like, well, I have more memories, I'm so life rich that the money didn't

matter to me. And I just think when I was thirty and looking back, and I had this idea in my mind of I was okay that I didn't have any money, and I was like, okay that I didn't have the kids and the engagement, because I just took a different perspective on life and I'm lucky that I spent my time with this Buddhist monk and he put me on this road to feeling okay with it, because otherwise, I can guarantee you I would have had a nervous breakdown thinking that I was thirty failure, that I hadn't

ticked any goals, that I was alone, and that really redefined my path where I realized it didn't matter anymore that I'm not doing what society wanted, and I actually was happy with where I was and what I had done and what I had ticked off, and I didn't feel like a failure, whereas I would have if I didn't have these experiences. There's a high chance that I would have let society's pressures get to me and everyone's questions get to me, and why are you single? Why

you have any money? Why are you still traveling? Why haven't you settled? Why don't you have your house yet? And I probably would have had a nervous breakdown. But I think this is so relatable, and I know that there's going to be loads of people who are listening to this who are like, YEP, thought I would be married by now and still don't know what I'm gonna

have for fucking lunch. But like, I mean, I read something when we were doing a bit of research for this, and something I really enjoyed was this quote, which was life doesn't follow a set of timelines, so stop expecting it to. And I do think that we have this expectation, especially when we're younger, where we're projecting what we want for our future. And like, of course it's important to have goals. Of course, it's important to think about what you want for yourself, have an idea of what a

five year plan is. But you know, life doesn't necessarily stick to a plan, and shit goes wrong and shit changes direction. And when you're in your early twenties, you don't necessarily know what you want for your thirties because you haven't lived that life yet, you don't have that life experience. And this isn't to say please don't think that. This is to say that every single person who has kids or gets married or whatever in their early twenties

is making the wrong decision. You're not, absolutely not. You're making the absolute best decision for yourself. Everybody lives a different life. But this is to more so empower people who are older, who are at a point in their life where they're like, you know what, I'm still not one hundred percent sure what I'm doing with myself. But that doesn't mean that you're wasting time, and it doesn't

mean that you're wasting your life. I think that that's something that's really important to take home from this as well. Also when I was doing my research, Brittany love that for you. So guys, you might not know this, but I know that there's there's a lot of conversation around divorce and like how often it happens. And I think that sometimes we almost focus on how marriage is futile

because divorce is almost inevitable. But divorce in Australia is actually on the decline and there are fewer now than any time in the last twenty years. So in twenty twenty we have our lowest rates of divorce, and as both the divorce rate and the divorce numbers have been declining. Ten years ago the divorce rate was two point seven per one thousand people. One year ago it was two point two, and today it's only two point one per

one thousand people. And they attribute that to the fact that people are getting married later in life, people are waiting longer to make those decisions, and that by making those decisions later in life, there comes this like really well educated and really well thought out, Like you've lived the fucking shit, you've had, the bad relationships, you know what you want, you know what you deserve, and you're not settling for something because there's this idea of a

timeline that's pressured around you. And you think back to our grandparents. Generate you married whoever it was that you dated when you were sixteen. My grandparents met when they were sixteen, They got married when they were twenty two.

Be married for fever. You know, that's just how life went. Obviously, there's pros and cons to the whole sticking through thick and thin, but we have the liberty of choice now in modern society, and this idea of choice also means that we're making better choices because we can wait a little bit longer to do that. Well, the other thing that's happening too is, as I mean this is going to be a general statement, but as women, we are

given more opportunity now. We never used to have the chance to work for ourselves and start our own businesses. We never had the chance to strive for promotions at work, compete in a male dominated industry, but now we do, which means our priorities are changing. A lot of people are starting to focus more on their career and getting ahead in life and financial security than focusing on finding a partner and having children and getting married. Because we

never used to have the opportunity. So that was back then. That was the timeline, and that's great because that was what was presented and people were making the best of their options. Well, women, we can go and do whatever the hell we want. There is nothing that you cannot do. And I think that's what's happening. Women are taking the bull by the horns and taking control of their life and chasing their dreams, and I think that is amazing.

Like Laura said too, we do want to reiterate that if you did meet your partner at sixteen and get married and have kids young, that is fantastic because that is your timeline. All this conversation is about is trying to make you feel better if you're not where society has said you should be the fact that the timeline doesn't matter. So if you did it in your twenties, if you did it in your thirties, if you did

it in your forties. All of it is irrelevant so long as it feels right for you, and you know, don't make decisions in your life based on what you think other people expect of you, or if your parents are like when are you gonna get married? When are you gonna have babies? I mean, I can't tell you how often my family made jokes about the fact that I'm still not married and say like, oh, well, are you ever going to get married? Like you know, or

you can have another kid and not be married. But for me, it's just not something that we think of as being super important, like we are going to get more next year, but I mean there's a part of me that's like, I really want to put that money on a house. I just think it's really important to know that this conversation is about creating a life that is fulfilling for you as an individual. So this is

very much in relation to you as a person. Something else we want to highlight is because we are spending more time on our jobs and because of the advances in science, and we are going to be talking about this in the next few weeks, we have the option of having children later in life. Now, so we don't feel the pressure as much of having to bang out some kids by thirty because then our eggs trivel up.

We don't have that anymore. We've got science is incredible, and we have a whole amazing episode guys coming on IVF and egg freezing and all the options that are available to you. I think this is something else that we're starting to realize now, and it's so empowering for women to realize that, oh my god, I don't have to put the rest of my life on hold because I have to have a child now, and then it's not like they have to circle back to their dreams

in ten years time. As much as there is no timeline for so many things in life, obviously, having kids is something that we can't avoid. Like as much as we can talk about and say, like, you know, live your life, do whatever you want to, there is a finite timeframe on like your fertility. That is something that is really important and we, like Britt said, we actually just today recorded a really awesome episode with a specialist on fertility, which will bring out in a couple of

weeks for you guys. Because we think that like this concept and conversation around timelines won't be complete without having a conversation around fertility. And it's not to scare you. It's not to say like, oh, those biological clock is ticking again. It's to empower your decision making and give you all of the tools to be able to say, oh, you know what, Okay, well I'm going to be cool for another ten years of my life. But something I just wanted to touch on that you also kind of

spoke about a little bit. As much as we have so much choice as women now, I also think that sometimes that choice can be very overwhelming in a sense. And there's this concept of like and this question, and I know that I had it just after I had Mali, and I think that maybe it's like one of those extential life crisis question you kind of ask yourself after you have a child. Well now that I'm a mom, Like, can I still have a career? Oh? Can we do

the podcast? Can I have a business? Can I How am I going to run all these facets of my life? And I do think we've sold this, this dream and this idealistic idea that you can have everything as a woman, right,

you can have it all? But I strongly feel now after juggling the last year of my life, that you can have it all, but you can't have it all at the same time, Like there has to be something that gives and like for me, you know, work has been something that I've really struggled with over the last year because I've prioritized being a mum, even though I am a business owner, even though we had the podcast.

And sometimes I feel like my relationship is the thing that takes the back burner from time to time because Matt used to be my absolute number one priority. We spent every day together, we spent every single second of free time together. And now there's Matt, there's work, there's Mali, there's physically being pregnant. And I think that, you know, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves as women to be successful in inverted commas and to try and

do every single thing at one time. And I just think that, you know, you don't end up having it all, you end up doing it all, and that's not a place where you necessarily want to be in either, because you're just gonna get fucking burnt out. Yeah, And this will lead us on to the next part of the conversation. Guys, that is on about changing careers and trying to go down a different road. And Laura and I, obviously we have both had different careers in our lifetime. I've gone

from God, what have I done? So I was in I still am. I still work in the hospital in diagnostic radiography. Deciding I wanted to write when I was about twenty six or twenty seven, So I started writing. And I wasn't trained in writing. I didn't go and study writing, but I enjoyed it. So I've reached out to some publications, sent them some They were like, send us some stuff. Just wrote some stuff and send us to them. And then all of a sudden, I was writing.

I was contributing to like a Traveler online wellness and health magazine, and I was like, wow, I've just done this because it's a passion. I At the start, I wasn't getting paid anything and it was just something that I enjoy doing. So all of a sudden, I took on another workload but I wasn't being paid for it. Then I decided, ah, I love health, I want to do something else with it. I love fitness, So I

went back and studied personal training. So I did that for two years studying, and I still did that whilst I was doing the rioting and whilst I was doing the diagnostic radiography. So all of a sudden, I'm doing three different things, all little like part time bits, but they're all things I'm interested in. So I found it easy because I wasn't doing it for monetary gain. I was doing it for no other reason than it was an interest. Fast forward a little bit further and started

the podcast. This is a whole nother, whole nother ballgame for me, guys. This is I do a lot of the business side of this, and I have never done business in my life. Oh I know. Sometimes I'm like Brea, you have to do an Excel spreadsheet for this, and she's like, how do I open two bulldogs? Yeah? And here I'm not kidding here. I am having like board meetings with people on Zoom. I'm writing contracts, I'm doing

the accounts. It's like it's insane, but I'm doing because I was so passionate about this part of it and bringing you guys a podcast. So again, and we did not get paid for this for the first year at all. Like we put in the hours and it was hard work. But we didn't get a cent from it. Then I decided in my thirties, I want to be an actor, So if I went and I went to drama school in my twenties, and I did. I started acting for a few years and I really loved it. I never

did anything with it. So then whilst I'm doing everything else, I was like, fuck it, I'm going to go and start auditioning the things and doing short films. And so I am definitely someone that can say with every part of my heart that I just feel like there's nothing that you can't do if you really are passionate about it. I'm someone that says, go and chase it, go and try it. But I'll be the first person to tell

you it is not easy. It comes with sacrifices. You're not going to go out there and be the best and the top straight away. You're not going to earn money for a long time. There's a lot of things that you have to think about when you're taking these steps. And this is why we want to talk about changing careers.

I mean, it's it's very normal to start a career, come out of UNI, go into the workplace, and then after a few years be completely disenchanted with it and be like, Okay, this isn't what I thought it was going to be. Or maybe it's longer than that, maybe it's seven years you've had children, and now you're like, well, that occupation doesn't really fit with my lifestyle. It doesn't fit with what I want for myself, and it's not giving me the flexibility or the life that I want.

So then there's this decision and this idea of like, well, do you completely change careers, do you pivot your life? Do you create something new for yourself? And that is such an overwhelming and scary thought I think for a lot of people, because there's this concept of like, well where do I start and what do I do? And

you know, do I start my own business? I mean, I do think that sometimes the online community can make becoming an entrepreneur seems so easy, Like, you know, anyone can start a Shopify account, anyone can put together a Facebook page and they can you know, put products on there and sell something. So I do think that there is this romanticized idea of what an entrepreneur is. However, it's not for everyone, but for the people who want to do it and are super passionate about all facets

of business. It's an incredibly rewarding occupation to take on. Statistically, people will change their careers seven times in their life. So if you're contemplating it and you're thinking about it, don't worry, you're gonna do it six more times, like this is just the first time. But you know, we are not supposed to be creatures of mundane, boring tasks or we do the same thing for the rest of

our lives. If you are unhappy and unfulfilled in your workplace, then it is time to start thinking about, like what can you do outside of that, and how can you make changes in your life to be able to allow for a changing career. And you know, for some people it's going to be a lot easier than others. I mean, I know for myself when I changed my career, I mean I So, I'll give you a bit of my backstory. Came out of UNI. I was a graphic designer. I

worked in an extremely corporate design firm. I did packaging design for hearing aids and dental appliances. I also did audiolog just clinic fit out, so I like designed picked all the color patterns for the bloody clinics. I picked like the types of chairs and stuff that were going to be in there. Clinch, I can never imagine you doing like the most boring design. If you can think of like doing something fun in graphic design, then strip all the fun out of it. That's the job that

I did. I made like letterheads anyway, So I mean I did that, and I did that for five six years when I came out of UNI, and I always had Tony May as like this little side hustle and side passion of mine. But I never really believed that it could be a job. I didn't think it could be a full time business. We actually did a full episode on like our careers and how we kind of

ended up where we are. So I won't totally go into like how I started Tony May or anything, but for me, starting a business was a complete career pivot, like it never I never expected it to end up becoming my full time business. I never really believed that

it could become my full time business either. But for one of my biggest, like my absolute biggest piece of advice for anybody who is wanting to pivot their career, is wanting to start something new, and this is what I have said to every single person I've ever mentaught, is that you don't just quit your job. That is

like the worst thing you can possibly do. If you're wanting to start a business or start a side hustle, you do it alongside the job that you already have, because that gives you When it gives you money in the bank, it gives you stability, it gives you structure, and you start to mold your other business in your free time, every second of free time you have. That's what you do, and that's how you manage to start

to build that secondary business. And it is only when you get that secondary business to a point where it has some financial stability that you can take that transition without it being quite a scary and overwhelming process. Because if you're just quitting your job and putting all your eggs into this new business basket and then it doesn't work in the first six months or one year, you

have no other option. You've got nowhere to go. So that is like my big take home to anybody who is wanting to like instantly pivot careers, You've got do this is a bit more of a slow transition. Couldn't agree more. And every single job site that I went on and career site that I went on in this was that was their number one piece of advice was like, don't just like get all excited one day quit your job and going to something else. So something to remember.

And I remember starting the podcast, I would work all day at the hospital all night, and then sometimes Laura and I would be meeting at the studio at like I'm not even exaggerating midnight, sometimes five am. We were doing these records. Well, when we started the podcast, I had literally just given birth, so I would come in between breastfeeding. We would have a two hour record slot because I was like, if I don't get home in two hours, my other like tits are going to explode

or Marley's going to be screen. We had no option but to fit in with Miley May because she's a newborn baby that like literally her life depends on feeding. So sometimes we would record and I would go to work for my shift an hour later, and it was insane, and I had people saying to me, why are you doing this, like you cannot you cannot do this, like you're crazy. Why don't you drop back some days or why don't you quit one of the jobs, and I was like, because I don't have a choice, Like, this

is literally what I have to do. We don't get paid for it, but I'm passionate about it. I want to make the transition into it. But I'm hyper aware that you have to dedicate a lot of time and energy, and unfortunately, you sacrifice a lot of things to get there. And now we're at a point where I've completely transitioned. I'm probably fifty to fifty now. I've cut down at the hospital, so I do a few days there and

then I focus a few days on this. But it took me, Like I don't want you guys to think I want you to know how hard it is to start your own business and put in the effort. We did a year with just like the craziest hours and so much stress between Laura and I, and I want you to be aware that that is reality. We don't

want to sugarcoat anything. Yeah, and a year of like I mean it's just specifically talking about this podcast, like we did a year of recordings and a year of creating free content that we did not make a single dollar off, and that for us was really really important because like one, we wanted to know that we could do it consistently, but we also wanted to know that we love doing it and that we were passionate about it, and that people wanted to listen to us, and that

you guys were going to keep coming back. But like something that I want to touch on though, like you know, it's easy for us to say, like that anyone can transition a career and that you can change your life and change your career at any time in your life, Like I do genuinely believe that. I think that you know, it doesn't matter if you're twenty, it doesn't matter if you're fifty, it doesn't matter if you're thinking about retirement, because like, there is always a time where you can

change and bring something new into your life. And that's what keeps us inspired. It's what keeps us stimulated, and it's what keeps our brains alive. Like literally, that's staying interested and being interested in things and learning new things is one of the most important things in life. Every single person is going to face their own set of challenges when transitioning or when wanting to make a career pivot.

I mean, the challenges that you'll face in your early twenties are very very different to the challenges that you're going to face when you have a family, and so you do have to approach those things and consider your context. You have to consider your priorities, You have to consider your family. You have to consider like the people that are dependent on you. If you have three children, obviously that's going to be a lot harder for you to

then just transition. Maybe you do have to wait a couple of years before you make those choices, and maybe there are more sacrifices that come along. But it's not to say that it's impossible. It's only impossible if you have the mindset of it's something that I can't do

and I'm never going to do. But if you research it, if you look at what study options there might be part time, if you look at people who in your area could mentor you, if you reach out to people who have created businesses very similar to one that you want to create, or they're doing careers in occupations that you would like to explore. I think that there's always an option for someone who is serious about making a

career pivot. But every single person is going to, you know, have a very unique set of challenges to do that well. For example, I have a girlfriend. She's a teacher, she's been a teacher for a long time, she has a child. She wanted a career change, but like, it wasn't it wasn't going to be easy for her. So for years she enrolled into psychology. She wants with cologist. She is doing a psychology course that's usually I think three to four years. She's doing it over almost ten years because

to her, that's her option. She's like, I'm gonna just start doing it. I'm interested in it, so I'm gonna I'm gonna start like part part, part, part, part time and just do one step at a time. Because the thing that you have to remember, guys, is life is going to change anyway. I mean, life is going to continue anyway, whether you're chasing your dreams or changing little

parts of your life to achieve what you want. Whether you're doing it or not, time is going past, So you may as well start to make changes so that as time goes past, you're you're growing with it. Do you get what I mean? One hundred percent? I mean it's the difference of like Okay, yeah, sure, you could say, well I don't want to do that new course because it's going to take me six years to do that

course and actually be finished. Well, you know what, you could be thirty and start now and when you're thirty six you'll be in a career that you want to be working in. Or you can be thirty six you didn't start when you were thirty, and you'll be still in the same shit career that you don't enjoy and that's not fulfilling for you. So I think you know, you can look at it from either side of the coin. Something can take you a hell of a lot longer

than what you expect, anticipate, or want. But if that means that when you get to that point in your life, that you're able to actually make that change and it's going to be fulfilling for you, and you're going to live a life that inspires you. And you get up in the morning and you're like, fuck, yeah, I love my job because I genuinely think, you know, you spend

fifty percent of your life at work. You should not be and I don't think anybody should be waking up in the morning going I fucking hate my job and I don't want to go to work. We've got some interesting statistics for you, Laura. On the Jobless website, they have this midlife career crisis survey, which I love the name of it, and I'm sure I've all been there or felt it at some point in time. But they did the top five reasons that people change careers in

their life. What do you think you have you seen this yet? What would you think is the top reason people change their career? So I would think one of the big reasons why someone would change their careers because I feel underappreciated. For me, that was a huge thing, like and one of the reasons why I wanted to work for myself was because I mean, maybe this is like such a gen what generation are we general? I get it all mixed up. There's so many gen letters

and I don't know what we are anymore. I was like, I know, this is like probably something that's very like my generation to say, but like, I never felt very appreciated in my role where I worked, and I always felt like, you know, I was hustling to try and get a pay you rise. I was constantly fighting for something that I felt like I deserved, and maybe my manager and my boss would be like, well, you had an inflated sense of your own self worth and you

thought you deserved more. But I look back on that time and I think I didn't really have the respect that I felt like I deserved as someone who was you know, I wasn't a senior, but I was doing very senior jobs. I was doing very senior jobs, and I had a very junior title, which didn't really sit with me. And you know, it was a conversation that kept happening over the space of five years, and eventually I was like, I'm so sick of being not appreciated

in this job. Well, forty seven percent of people, so the highest number of people the reason that they changed their care is for better pay. Oh yeah, money talks, Yeah, money talks. Thirty nine percent said that their job was just too stressful, so they were trying to take you know, they're trying to wind it back a little bit. Thirty seven percent wanted a better work life balance, so too

much overtime, too many weekends. Yeah, And I think that that sort of percentage as well would change as you get older, so like, you know, what you want when you're in your twenties is different to what you want in your thirties and it's different to what you want in your forties. And then only twenty five percent said that they wanted a new challenge, which I found was interesting because I feel like that's sort of maybe what you where you're at. You're like on boord af I

want something new. However, if you look at the very last one that you've got there on the list, it says no longer passionate about the field. So I reckon, you can put wanted a new challenge and no longer passionate in the same category. So that takes up forty five percent of people who after a while of being in the same career feel disenchanted by that career. And well, then to continue on with the survey, after people changed their jobs and their careers, they went back and resurveyed them.

Seventy seven percent said that they were happier, seventy five percent they were more satisfied, sixty nine percent said that they were more fulfilled, and sixty five percent said they

were less stressed. So there's some pretty positive statistics. Well, I guess one of the things that I just wanted to highlight as well about this idea of like you know, having a career change later in life is like it doesn't matter what career you have, there's always going to be days where you don't necessarily want to do your job. Like I mean, I am so fortunate. I love my job, I love my business, but there are definitely days where

I'm like, I don't really like work today. And that is always going to follow you no matter what you do or where you work or whatever tasks are put on your plate. But it's this overwhelming feeling if you every day are living for the weekend, if your Monday and Friday are like the black hole of your week, and then your weekends or what you live for, and that's when you actually feel like you come alive. Now, that's when you really need to start considering, like, well,

what am I doing with my life? I don't want to waste this time because you should be getting up ninety nine point nine percent of the time and being like,

you know what, I've got it pretty fucking good. I've had so many people over the last few months constantly writing because we get you guys writing in a lot about what you want us to talk about about, your questions that you want us to answer and there's been a lot of questions that have literally been regarding I'm not happy with what I am at thirty four, I'm not happy with where I am at thirty eight? How do I change this? Do I change this? Am I

stupid for giving up a really good job? So I think we just wanted to address it and let you know that you know, there aren't any precious for what you can do. There's no limitation on what you can

do and when you can do it. If you don't have your baby at thirty five or at thirty and you're not married and you're not engaged, we want you to feel that A you're not alone, and B there is absolutely nothing wrong with that because you were just on your journey and your age does not determine if you can be successful, just like your bank account doesn't determine if you're happy. Wow, that was so I'm really

enjoyed that. But before we go and before we wrap this up completely, like I really wanted Like and I to both share our own personal journeys in this episode. And it wasn't to kind of like hop on about ourselves or to like be overly self indulgent, but it's like I think that sometimes, you know, we can put out there that we have our shit together, and we can kind of put out there that you know, we're kicking all these life goals, but we ain't. My shit

is not together. I still slave away in a hospital. I still do all the things. Yeah, but I think then when you break it down, and you know, you look at what somebody else's idea of like, and and I think about myself personally, I'm sure that there's people who look at me and go, oh, well, you know, you're happily in a relationship and you have, you know, another kid on the way like that, there you go,

you fit the timeline. But then when I break down and actually look at what I expected of myself and what I expected of my timeline, those things didn't match up for me. And so I guess, you know, we really wanted to kind of show you guys that, like the timeline doesn't fucking matter. Like, live your life in a way that makes you happy, that empowers you, that makes you feel spontaneous, and you are getting the absolute

most out of life. And know that if the reason why you're feeling insecure or not good enough, or you're questioning your decisions in life is because of other people's expectations on you, then that's their fucking problem and not yours. Boom, did I think that I would be thirty three, single and childless? I'm talking shit in my laundroom at midnight

with you. No, all right, guys, you know that we never finish an episode without our suck and our sweet and that is our highlight and our low light of every single week. And Brittany, you can kick it off. What was your suck? Come at me, girl? Ha ha? Something funny actually happened. And it's not that it's actually not that sucking, but it's as sort of is I'm literally talking to I have one guy that is sort

of like in my life at the moment. I know I haven't been updating you all my love life much at the moment, guys, but I've just been too busy. But I've got this one guy that I was talking to online. And anyway, I woke up this morning and he had texted me, so I wrote to him, good morning. That was it. Then I got about my day. I got really busy, and then I went back a couple of hours later and I don't know what had happened, but it had wigged out and it had sent my

good morning text eight times. I'm not kidding. It looks like I had written good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, and I got like, progressively more passive aggressive as the good morning's past. Honestly, I was like, why, why, why are you malfunctioning like this? Why are you doing me dirty like this? Do me like this? Anyway? So I had to write back again. So I was like a nine row texter, and I

was like, I'm not sure why. I'm not sure why I said this nine times and he hadn't written back to you then, and then I don't know what happened, but he must. He must his his profile must have been deleted. No, his phone must be bless him. He wrote, all or your phone really just wants you to talk to me something like he was trying to like make up for it. But surely he would know I didn't message him nine times, right, No, he probably thinks you're crazy,

especially if he listen to this podcast. Okay, what was your sweet? My sweet? Is? I? Well, it hasn't happened yet, but I'm waking up early in the morning. And I am flying down to Adelaide tomorrow. I'm actually the first flight and god knows how long getting out of the bubble, and it's like it's going to feel finally like we're

doing something. It's actually so rough, Like I mean, obviously, like we have so many of you guys are based in Melbourne, and we have so many people who have been listening to the podcast throughout your crazily extended lockdown, and like I know that sometimes it must sound like here we're just in a different world because we've just been able to kind of get on with life in

some sort of relatively normal way. But yeah, like thinking of you, because it's just I'm so happy that things are starting to relax and that you guys have you can leave your houses and there's no five colonial limit anymore, and like all of this is going to be behind us and be a very very strange thing that one day we're going to tell our kids or our grandkids. Yea, hopefully you guys are really on the home stretch now.

We genuinely we are. Our thoughts are with you all the time, all right, So my suck, my suck for the week. Well, I mean I think we all kind of know what that is, the fact that I needed to mentor I literally didn't get out of bed. So we recorded last week's episode on Monday, and then after we recorded, I went to bed, and then I didn't get out of bed for like six days. It was insane. Six days. I just stayed in bed. I walked maybe from the bed to the toilet, that was about it.

Sometimes to the fridge if Matt wasn't home. But I just couldn't. I physically couldn't get out of bed. I've never ever felt so sick. I've never felt so depleted of energy. And so I yep, sound like I'm being super dramatic, but that was absolutely my suck. The entire week was my suck. My sweet is that today is the first day that I have literally left the confines of my apartment. I walked out of my house and I was like, that's what the sun like, Like you're

melting like a vampire. Yeah, So like today has been. It's so nice to just feel healthy again and like to not take that for granted. But anyway, guys, thank you so much to everybody who's listened to another episode. We like, we love you, guys. We love like all of your involvement and your conversations happening on the Facebook page at the moment, it blows my mind. Oh my god. If you haven't watched sas, I'm like so hooked, it's disgusting. We can talk about it in the Facebook group. Get

in there. If you've been watching it. Brit has some suppressed trauma about watching it. She hasn't seen the episodes yet, so she does need to catch up because honestly, if you haven't watched it, it is the best bit of reality TV going around at the moment. Anyway, back on track Life on Cut podcast. That's our Facebook group. We've also got the Instagram. If you're not following that, then do so because there are some very funny lolls going

down there. And if you haven't, if you're one of the cheeky people that have listened to so many episodes, then haven't gotten on to Apple to leave us a review yet, then you're in the naughty book. Just do it a Laura in the naughty corner. That's what you're in. But yes, jump on and leave the review at Apple Podcasts because we will love you forever. Guys. We hope you took something away from today, and if just at the minimum, all we want you to know is that

wherever you are in your journey, that is life. Wherever you are it is so okay because it is your journey. Now, he subscribe five stars, leave review, and share the love because we love love