I feel like we were lower last time. Well you would think that, Brittany, wouldn't you. I'm pretty sure I think it's fuck Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura and I'm the other host, Brittany.
Hi, Brittany, my cheeks are already hurt from Oh god, it's been a real today.
Guys.
Guys, Happy Tuesday. We have a real ripper episode for you today. Is what britt was trying to say. Today, we're talking about something that sounds a little bit boring, but I guarantee you it's not going to be. We're going to be talking about finance in relationships.
Now, wake up, don't go to sleep yet. We think this is actually going to be a really great topic.
I put some feelers out on Instagram, and can I say I have actually never had more interest in any of my stories that I have ever put up than I have had when I put a relationship finance question up.
It was unbelievable. Show me the money, honey.
I just couldn't believe how many people were actually passionate about it. So many people wrote to me saying I'm so excited for this episode. My husband and I bigger about this all the time. I can't wait to see what people have said, Like, the interest was incredible.
I didn't expect it.
Well, it's definitely something that causes a lot of friction in a lot of relationships. So I'm super stoked to get into this as well. But before we get into the topic, we've got a few other things we need to you know, housekeeping.
We've got to check off the list. Brett, how's your day, how's your week being? Where are you being?
I mean, grandhog Day, really, isn't it? My week's been pretty good, pretty uneventful. I actually, well, I'm moving. I secured a new little house on the weekend, and so that's exciting. I have two weeks to wrap up my whole life and prepare.
A new life.
How did you tell your current housemate that you're moving out? It always comes with some sort of like just trepidation and fear.
It does.
And I'm not moving out for any reason other than I want my own space. I wanted I just it was time for something a bit different in my life.
I wanted something.
Creative, I wanted a new energy, and I wanted to live alone.
So I just shot them a message.
Really took that on in the most non confrontational ways. Don't break up with your boyfriend via text, but break up with your housemates via text.
That's really healthy.
I okay, let me explain myself. Yeah, I hate confrontation, but I don't see this as confrontation. I just see this as the only reason I sent a message was because I am at home. They're working long hours, and I was like, I just want to I just want to tell them. So I was like, Hey, just letting you know my Daham has come. See your bitches like, it's not you, it's me.
That's where to go. It really was me.
I like the place and the people have been amazing. I've been there for about fifteen months. Love it beautiful house. But it's just time for my next chapter. So I actually own nothing, not one thing. I have to furnish a whole house. And I don't know if you remember how hard that is. You've probably accumulated stuff over the years. I when I was poor, I used to just get things off the side of the road.
There's one for you, daily Mail.
I have so much of my furniture up until very recently, when I moved in with Matt, so much of my furniture was from council cleanups. We live in the Eastern Suburbs, so we live very close to an area that's called belvy Hill, and belvy Hill is where all the stinking rich people in Sydney live and they put such good stuff out on.
The side of the road.
It's such an affluent area that the things on the side of the road here are like some people's dreams. Before we moved into this apartment, we actually lived with two housemates. So when I was pregnant, we live with two housemates and we lived in Yeah. When I'm looking at you, yeah, I know, because I think that, you know, people kind of normally think when you're pregnant, you take this really traditional linear path towards like a normal relationship.
Matt and I did not at all.
So when I was pregnant, Matt and I lived with his two best friends, Lisa and Ed. We lived sort of in South BONDI and I prior to that had lived with my housemates. So when I actually found out I was pregnant, we weren't living together. We were living separately still, and then we moved in together. This yeah wild right, The daff and not even living together controversial.
I can't believe I haven't shared that yet. Yes, we live in.
Sin guys, we're still not married banking on baby number two.
At least you got a ring, now, that's true. Yeah, he's trying to make an honest woman myself. Bo we never actually make the wedding. But the point of.
This story is is that when we moved in together, Matt accidentally threw away the top of my coffee table, the coffee table that I found about seven years ago on the side of the road.
He threw it away by accident. He thought it was garbage, and I was so attached that said so much.
I was so attached to this copy table that we had a full blown fight about it.
So there you go, guys.
If you're really in need of some furniture, I recommend Bellevue Health. That is actually so funny. Imagine thinking it was trash and that's why you threw it out.
Yeah, anyway, well trashed the treasure.
Well anyway, besides from a moving house and trying to organize that part of my life, something just happened to me. It was so funny, but also it was so painful. I was in tears, literally, Laura, as I was coming here. So it's been pouring all day.
Now.
I had this house that's quite big and open, and from the front door in it's all polished concrete. The rain had come underneath my front door and I couldn't see it, and it was like all over the concrete. And I went sort of like skip, hop, run, jumping, like I don't know something that Brittany would do.
Why are you doing that? Why do I do anything?
So I'm sort of doing this thing to get out the front door, and I hit the water and one leg goes one way and the other leg goes the other way. The front leg smashes into the front door. I'm pretty sure I've broken my toes. The other leg, I've rolled my ankle, and then my arm has smashed into.
This hook on the wall and you saw my arm. Lore, I've got like this.
Big blood scratch up it. I start crying, rolling around the on the ground in the water.
Still I've got wet pants. It's like. It was a very dramatic scene.
And this is the real reason why you should all stay inside and stay safe.
Got nothing to do with Corona.
That just happened and I guess what else can update you on? Oh, I do have another update. This is how exciting my life is, guys. So the last thing I have to update is I, like the rest of the world, have been making banana bread. I make it every day. Okay, that's a lie. I make it once a week, love it. But today I just went super rogue and I put heaps of KitKat in the banana bread.
And I feel like that's newsworthy for me because nothing else has happened. How is that new story? Oh yeah, that's it. It doesn't get better. I was just it.
It was delicious, though, I mean, I understand why it's a highlight, like it's pretty exciting, but at the same time, it's also not a highlight for the rest of Australia.
Actually, do you know what I realized. I'm sorry, I'll work. I'll work on my ISO stories. Lawrence, what's happening in my life?
I was saying this to Matt, so Matt was listening. When I was doing the editing on our last podcast. Matt walked in and one of something I had said. I was like, oh, you know, when this goes out on like a national podcast, and Matt turns around to.
Me and he's like, this is an a national podcast, it's an international podcast.
And it may be really it's true, I'm an idiot. Yeah, this isn't just people from Australia who are listening to this. This is an international podcast. And I say a lot of really dumb shit. Does it matter if the dumb shit you have said only reaches Australians or reaches Americans or Norwegians, Like, does that matter?
It's just I think it's because it's a lot of broadcasting of my personal life. Guys.
Well, we do have listeners writing from Norway and Sweden, Canada and America, so they are out there. Actually, I did see the other day that we'd gone up twenty five places in Hungry. So if you're in Budapest and you're listening to us, I'm here for you because if I feel like if I were a country, I would be hungry.
That was so bad that it was excellent. I loved every second of it, all right, shout out to Hungry Anyway, how was your week?
Well, look, I gave you a bit of flak for talking about your kit Cat banana bread, but do you know what happened to me this week. Okay, two things. I've got two things to tell you. One thing is that Maley is teething. And if you're a parent, I really highly recommend don't do it.
Just skip it.
Don't parent, don't go through the teething phase. I reckon, just miss it. Blend their food until they're eighteen. Like fuck teeth, kids do not need them.
They are a waste of time. Had teeth is actually that cute. It's like one meal long.
Marley woke up every forty five minutes all through the night, or twenty minute, two half an hour at a time, like screaming. I have not had a night like this. She was a newborn. She was like paining, consolable and like gnashing her teeth and trying to scratch my face. I was like, this is this is the spawn of Satan, this is a demon choice. My child is in the Exorcist right now. It was just one bad, bad night of teething. But since then, every single night has been
super disruptive. But then all of a sudden, a little slither of a second truths popped up.
It's so cute.
I can't even And then I was like, holy shit, we've got thirty six more of these to go.
I love that I came in tonight. Marley's sitting on the lounge really chill, holding a toothbrush, and I'm like, babe, like one mill long, what are you brushing? We're teaching an oral hygiene. It's very very important, guys.
Second thing that I'm going to tell you about may indicate that you probably shouldn't take finance advice from me, but also it was a win advice.
Brittany, all right, don't take English advice from right? I love you, love you, so I told you, guys.
Ages go about this minor preying that I had in my car where I ran into my ex boyfriend's current or slash very recently ex girlfriend, right, Like, something that shouldn't happen to anyone ever happened to me.
Well, I love trying car crash? You want? Is it? No? Look, my relationship with him was enough of a car crash.
I definitely didn't need to run into his current girlfriend in my freaking car. I got a letter from Nrama saying that I needed to pay for the damages, which came as a bit of a surprise to me because
when I had spoken to GOEO. They had told me that it was kind of mutually both our faults and anyway, so that stuff's boring, sure, but I called GOEO today to try and sort out what was happening, and then I found out that they had launched the claim against a car that I owned five years ago, and for the past five years I have been paying CTP insurance on a car that I don't own. Insane, How do you not do you? Was it like a monthly deduction or were you paying annually with that? Like?
How are you paying that?
It was like just a direct debit that just constantly came out of my bank account, and then when I needed to renew it would call up and renew it on the phone. And of course when I sold that car, I told them I didn't want it anymore. I told them I didn't have it. I told them I didn't need to ensure it, and somewhere along the paper train
that didn't exist. Because everything's done on the internet now, I just didn't read the details, and so I got reimbursed a shit ton of money today, so us, Yeah, it was a kind of weird situation that turned into a bonus.
However, five years of forced savings.
Yeah, look, I wouldn't recommend it, but I am now going to tell you how to navigate your financial love life if you're still with us.
Before we jump into that.
I want to follow up something from last week, and I think the week before it's been ongoing that Celeste Barber and her fundraiser. It was sort of on the fence with what was going to happen with the fifty one million. Was it actually going to be able to be dispersed or was it going to be stuck in this one charity? And it has come out that it cannot be spread, it cannot be dispersed, and it has sustained the one charity.
I'm so disappointed.
Well, we were talking about this in last podcast and how how like conversation around this was like, there's no possible way that it's going to have a ruling where it's not going to end up being redistributed out to other charities and to families and firefighters and everyone else who has been affected by what happened earlier this year. We were just so certain, which I think, like, I mean, there's there's an issue in that we should never be
certain of anything before it actually comes to fruition. But it's yeah, they've come out now and they've said that no, that fifty one million dollars has to go to the RFS, and it has to be distributed throughout the trust and through the services that the RFS specialize in, like it can be used on administration costs, it can be used on training, it can be used on equipment, it can be used for therapy and for the firefighters and their
families who lost their lives during what happened earlier in January.
But it cannot be distributed.
Or evenly dispersed throughout any other charities in Australia. And I just feel I.
Feel a little bit angry about it, Guys.
I feel like it's personal because so many people were they emotionally and financially invested in that, and they were doing it because they really really believed that their money was going to go to all these people and all these states and all these animals and like every single person or situation that was affected by the fires. And to hear now, I get that this is legislation, I get that there's a dotted line that we signed on, but have a bit of compassion and almost use your
heart a little bit. I guess, I guess like, look, I mean, it's definitely not the rfs's fault, like they have they have come to the table and they are trying to find ways to better distribute the money, but the High Court has ruled that that's not a possibility. The issue I guess I have with it is it doesn't lie with Celeste Barber. I think that she's an
incredible woman. We all know that her intention was so pure and that it came from a place of wanting to do everything that she possibly could to make a difference in a time where so many people were suffering and so many people were so horribly affected. The problem is, as much as it's said on the go fundme page,
it was very black and white. It said the money that was raised would be going to the r r However, Celeste Barber then got on her social media, which at that point in time had seven million or so followers, and she promised that it would be distributed to other charities. And I think that that's where this conversation really has a bit of a social and moral implications, because this promise was made and then she continued to encourage people to continue to donate under the promise that it would
be redistributed evenly. You know, maybe there needs to be some reconsideration as to how it's distributed. And Britta and I were talking earlier and I was like, surely, surely they could have created an email or like an email petition where an email gets sent out to every single person who donated to that GoFundMe page and it's literally like, hey, guys, you're from Australia. You fucking know what's going on because everyone does, and this is all over the news at
the moment. Do you want your ten dollar contribution to go to several different charities?
Please? Tick?
Which charities? Do you want it to only go to the RFS? Like, I feel like that could have beat a solution to this. Also, I think Celeste is such an incredible woman and what she has done is incredible and it pains me a little bit to see her go through this because she's copped a lot of slack for it, like people some people are saying almost like it was intentional. You could see from her that she honestly, from the bottom of her heart, believed it was going
to be spread evenly. There's no way she would have encouraged people from around the world to donate that amount of money thinking that it would be going to one place. She really really believed that it was going to be spread out evenly. And I my heart breaks for a little bit because she's copped a lot of slack. She has fought it tooth and nail. She's done everything she possibly can, So we still need to take our hat
off to her. And I don't know, I'm I'm definitely a bit deflated and a bit disappointed.
Yeah, I'm with you, Britt.
Like I think it's so important to not point the finger at someone who has done everything that they possibly can to do what they thought was the right thing, because all that's going to do is discourage other people in the future to put their hand up to try and raise money for really important causes. I think this is a huge lesson to learn, maybe that when there is legislation in place, that that laws of laws, rules of rules, and sometimes they can't be broken regardless of
whatever social influence you have. But I do genuinely believe that her intentions were so pure and so incredible, and that she should not be copying the brunt for any of this anyway.
Welcome to the news room with Britain Laura.
Now it's time to get into accidentally unfiltered or.
In this case, accidentally vomited. Oh god, Yeah, guys.
Last week we put a call out after my disgusting story where I vomited through the fly screen and brit vomiting up a kebab. We shouldn't have done that because you guys are fucked up. You're a bunch of sicos for sure. No, look, we put a call out. We were just on the spot. We were just saying, hey, have you guys ever done something that's so ridiculous and embarrassing on our first date and you've continued to date.
That was the question. It could have been anything, but all we got was vomit. Ye take hundreds of followed questions.
But I mean, I do think that we were kind of to blame with that, Like both our stories were vomit stories.
But guys, I'm not even I'm not even exaggerating.
We have received hundreds of messages over the past week with your disgusting vomit stories.
Yeah, we've had hours of laughter, but I want to kick it off hours lols.
So many of them with a Lolla derby all around here was I definitely needed some panel hol bad run out. I'm going to kick it off with actually a message I got from my dad just yesterday. Hey big tones, we're miss This is a message. Hey babe, just listened to both epps from last week during my workout this morning.
Good staying in shape.
Any yeah, anyway, just about Laura's vomit story, it really resonated with me because once a long, long time ago, we had a wardrobe with sliding doors right next to the on suite which also had sliding doors. And Yep, one night, I was very drunk and I needed to get to the on sweet quick. I remember just getting the door open before I coded what I thought? What
was Yon Suite in my vomit? My projectile vomit. Now imagine my puzzlement when the next morning I went to clean up beyond suite to find it was completely untouched. And my horror when I went to get my workshow from the wardrobe.
Made me laugh. Our lad thinking of it, Your mum not so much.
Oh Papa, Tony bless you, Tony bless you.
Is that the one that you're reading or did you have no just and I wanted to read it. Do we want to do multiple vomit stories? I want to read one more.
Yet I feel gross already, so I need to go on to say that like that happened with mum and dad and they have been together for forty two years.
So that was success.
Out of the out of the hundreds of vomit stories we did receive, guys, I had picked one that really stood out to me.
I guess to maybe because it made my skin crawl a little bit. Here we go.
When I first met my now fiance, we would go out for long dinners followed by drinks late into the night at multiple bars.
One night, very.
Early on in to seeing each other, we headed home after a huge night out and I thought it would be super hot and sexy to have a bath together.
I was so.
Drunk and I started to feel really unwell, and I couldn't hold it back any longer. I vomited up all of the pasta and red wine into the bar. You cannot imagine the color of the water and the chunks floating everywhere. He's sitting opposite me. He got me out, chunks covered everywhere, showered me, and put me in my pajamas.
That was five years ago.
We had to cancel our wedding due to COVID this year, but we have been engaged.
For a year. It's actually so rank.
So romantic. Guys like I just you know what a picture. That's a good man who stands by you.
No, you know what? You know? You throw that fish chunks to sharks. What's it called? It's like chuck chucks. Thanks for that image.
I have one, accidentally unfiltered that has nothing to do with vomit, and can I just I'm just gonna put this out there. If you have a vomit story, do not send it to us. I don't want to read anymore. Keep that to yourself and bury. But this one I quite liked and had a really really good chuckle over. I am a fully grown adult, and I moved home to be with my family during COVID, So you know what, I'm thirty two and I live with my parents. Anyway,
this one day I was sat home alone. Everyone else was out in dogwalk and I was pretending like I was going to study. Bored and horny, so I decided to stick on some pawn. My family had just left, so I figured, you know, what. I've got some time to myself. But boy, was I wrong.
I love me.
I was midway through my meantime when I saw something out the corner of my eye. I look up and I see the biggest fucking spider I've ever seen in my entire life, Like think the size of a computer mouse, and it's lowering itself from the ceiling. I let out the most blood curdling, ground shaking scream that I could possibly muster, and at that very second.
My door flies open.
My father run him holding a dog collar and looks eyes for me.
He's innocent. Yeah, girl, butt naked sprawling across her.
Bed with one hand on over vagina. He slowly backs out, closes the door, doesn't say a word, and the look of pure horror on his face was remarkable.
That's do you know what? I think The funniest thing is Wait is more.
I'm pretty sure he must have come home for the spared dog collar that we keep in the cupboard next to my bedroom, and then he heard me scream, but because I was wearing earphones, I didn't hear him come in. They have been home for hours now and.
I haven't left my room.
I'm gonna post you guys an update if I don't die from embarrassment.
The funny thing was.
When you're reading that story and you're like, until I realized I wasn't home alone, and then you said the spider was lowering itself from the roof. I'm like, girl, get alivee A spider watching you massurbate is not a big deal. That's where I thought the story was going, Like the spider corner like sprung.
Oh my god, I just love this so much.
I just love that she got full button ache and to masturbate, Like, what's wrong with just.
Putting your hands down your pairs? She needs the freedom.
That's a lot of effort. It's more effort than I go to but I'm pretty lazy. Let's be around a guys. Well, on that note, I think it's time for us to dive into the topic of today, guys talking money in a relationship. It is generally not a very sexy topic. And I don't know about you, but it puts me to sleep. Direct Devin interest free joint bank account.
We said it's not sexy, so I'm trying to make it a real sexy.
Okay, you definitely didn't, but thanks, but nonetheless, guys, it is boring. It's definitely not sexy, even though Laura tries to make it sexy. But it is important and it is something that has to be discussed at some point in your relationship in order to have a healthy, open, ongoing, and long term relationship. Whether or not you guys want to talk about it, we're going to.
Double penetration, I mean jewel income. How are we thinking of it?
Was a while no, but honestly, guys, of finances and fighting about finance is one of the biggest biggest hurdles in a relationship. I think it's like cheating is like the number one reason why people break up, and the second one to that is finance.
And maybe it doesn't seem like a.
Big deal when you're young and you know you're just getting into a relationship, but you know what, as you start to mature that relationship, as you guys get older, as you have more responsibilities and you know, just life everything, there's more pressures that come with age, and there's more pressures that come with commitment.
That's when you're.
Savings, your ability to save, the way that you guys do with money, the way that you view money, the way that you put your money together and what's mine is yours or yours is mine, or mine and yours is ours. That was a lot of things going on there, But you know what I mean, I'm more like, what yours is mine, what's mine is mine, So don't take but that all will massively impact your ability to communicate it or massively impact your ability to have a happy,
long and fulfilling relationship. So that's why we thought it was really important, and we wanted to kind of break it down and talk about a few different aspects of it, like when do you have that conversation with your partner about opening a joint bank account, and how do you manage your finances when you move from being just newly dating to being a married couple when you have dependents like kids, So that we're going to kind of unpack a few aspects of this.
I found it so interesting.
And I know that we joke and we say it's a boring topic, it actually isn't that boring once you Once I put the feelers out and I was asking some questions from our Instagram listeners, and once I did my own research, it's quite interesting the way people do things, the way they break it down the way people like in the relationship. One couple thinks that something should be done one way and the other couple things it should
be done the other way. And also, I guess, like what we want to just kind of preface before we really get into this is that there isn't one hard and fast rule for how this should be. There's so many colors of gray to like what works for different relationships.
There are definitely some hard and fast rules, like obviously you never want to be in a relationship where someone is using money as a way of having control or as a power play in a relationship, But there are multiple healthy ways for you to deal with money in a relationship. So we just want to make sure that, like you guys know, like we don't think that there
is a black and white way of doing things. We're just kind of giving you some best case scenarios and some options if this is a conversation that you're ready to have with your partner, or it's something that you're struggling with right now.
I found it really interesting when I looked at this.
Studies have shown that most couples do not know what is going on in their partner's finances. It's been shown that thirty percent of people don't know their partner's salary, which I find mind boggling because I think that if I was in a relationship to the point of wanting to buy a house, or getting married or saving for a wedding, I would want to know what my partnerns I think. I mean, guys, I'm not in a long term relationship. I have been before, and I have known
what he earned. I just can't imagine being with someone and having no idea what they were bringing home. Well, I think of it like a lows my mind that there are couples that don't know. But I guess it also comes down to I think this comes when there can be a big discrepancy between someone's income. So, for example, just say you're dating someone and they earn way more than you like. You know that they earn a shit ton of money, but you don't really know how much money.
I think that that's when this conversation is sometimes kept a bit private. Maybe it's kept because whoever it is that's earning more money doesn't want to be fully disclosing of it because one they don't want to feel like they're having to pay for every single thing, or they're not wanting the person to like want to be with
them from their financial perspective. But I do think that if you're in a really committed relationship where you have really open dialogue and you talk about everything, which is what you're supposed to be doing, then finances is part of that and you should kind of know what somebody is earning in the beginning, in the early days of dating, getting to know someone. I don't think it's anyone's business what you're earning, and I think you sort of navigate
that on your your own terms. Maybe you paid it in a last week, I'll get this week. It's not about you earn more than me, so you're paying for more. But definitely down the track when you move in together and you get married and you need to start budgeting for your life i e. Children and houses, paying bills, maybe you're a stay at home mum, you definitely need to know then, and not even just that like holidays and dinners and like the fun shit that you guys do.
You kind of need to know that because we.
Need to know what you bringing in.
Yeah, and if you're always going out for like fancy dinners, and one of you is actually living above their means and they can't really afford it, and the other one is earning bank and can afford it. Then like you need to make sure that you're kind of contributing to that evenly, and evenly doesn't always mean fifty to fifty split monetarily down the middle. It is super tricky to navigate,
and it does change throughout the whole relationship. So from the beginning when you just start dating, to when you do decide to get more serious, and then you move in together, and then you get married, and then you have kids, it all changes.
So we're gonna go and start back at the very beginning, and that is we have touched on it in a previous episode, but I just think we need to bundle them all together in this episode. Laura thoughts who pays on the first date.
We have very conflicting ideas on this, and like Britz said, we've done a whole other episode on this. It's called dating Etiquette. Dating Etiquette one oh one, go back and listen to that after this. But I think first date, depending on who asked for the date, I think at first date can be very fifty to fifty. I think that as a chick, you can offer to pay if the guy asked to pay, Like, if the guy says he wants to pay, then let him pay, Like, you
don't have to force that. But I will always offer to pay, because, especially if I don't even know if I want to see the guy again, I don't want to feel indebted to seeing him. I don't want to feel like I owe him anything, So I'll always offer a fifty to fifty split. Yeah, Like, I'm fine with that. Your thoughts if Yeah, Look, if he's asked me on a date, I will always offer as well. But I'm not gonna fight him to the death. I'll always throw
in the offer. But I do think that if he's asked me on a date, then he can pay, but I will probably go and get the dreams after, like I have. I have a hard time letting anyone.
Do too much for me or pay for too much for me. I've never been able to do that.
Yeah, I don't think it depends on who you are as a person, Like I'm sure that there's people out there who are away more comfortable with taking in that sort of situation where they're like a bit more traditional than like, okay, the guy pays for dinners, but I think more and more in like today's society, and also in like today's dating culture, there's a bit more of
an expectation that it's fifty to fifty. Then I think once you start dating, if you go on a date the next week, he paid last week, you can pay. I think in the early days, it doesn't have to be the guy trying and woo the woman for a month or two months or I think those days are long gone, and I think it should be pretty fifty to fifty at the beginning, one hundred percent. And I don't mean fifty to fifty like he maybe he took you to a two hundred dollars dinner because he earns more.
You don't have to go and match.
That and take him to an equally expensive place. But it's more the idea of, hey, look you got last time, I'll get this time. Even if it was just like pizza and a few beers. It's just it's the effort
and the thought. Well, the other thing is if he's asked you, invited you to a dinner, and he has booked the restaurant and it is a ridiculously expensive restaurant, he he can't expect you to pay half, I don't think, and the same if you decide on the restaurant, if you have picked a really really expensive restaurant, you can't expect him to pay for that either. So I think you just have to use your brain be smart about it.
And I do think like also at the beginning, when you start dating someone and you start to kind of suss out what someone likes to do, and like that does also play into their finances. So if you are someone who's like super bougie and you like to go out for really expensive dinners because you are working really hard and you make really good money, and like you
want to you want to enjoy those things. And then you start dating someone who clearly doesn't enjoy those things or they just want to like, you know, get a bottle of wine and go sit down the beach and that's just not for you, Well, then you're probably not going to continue dating them anyway, because I do think for like the longevity of relationship, it is really important that you both have aspirations to have similar types of lives and that you like to do very similar things.
So I think that that kind of wears itself out in the wash. Anyway, I remember I went on a date quick story love it.
I remember I wanted to take Bondie. I can't remember I've told you guys this before.
I probably have in one of my ridiculous past stories. But long story short, it was a lunch date. It was literally a sandwich and a smoothie date. And he made me go and get twenty dollars cash out to give him so that it would be paid evenly, even though I tried to pay for the whole thing in my card. He outrageous, outrageous, And then the whole date he proceeded to tell me about how wealthy he was and like how many properties he had and blah blah blah.
And I was like, dude, you literally just made me something's not adding up here because I had to go get twenty dollars cash out to pay for a bloody turkey and cray for sandwich. Doesn't that just highlight like when somebody is of such a different saving personality to you, So like, I think that's something else that we will talk about as well. But like maybe you are a
spender like you, Like I said, you're a bougie. You like to spend your money, and maybe the person that you're dating is a saver and they're like super frugal and if anything, like sometimes they're a bit cheap about it. That doesn't make either one of these personalities bad personality, Like, it doesn't mean that you're a bad person because you like to spend money. It doesn't mean that they're a
bad person because they like to really save money. It just means you're very different and you're gonna probably have to work a bit harder to be on the same page.
Anyway.
Moving along, we're moving in together. You're moving in with your partner. You've never lived together before. How do you work out your finances? Who pays for what you earn? Different incomes? How do you work out your ran bills, groceries.
Furniture, et cetera.
Okay, So I've had a couple of long term relationships now where I've lived with a partner, Like, I've lived with three different guys for you know, several years each one, not just like in total anyway, So and all of them have been extremely different personality types when it comes to their money. So, the first guy that I was with We were together for six years. He was he
was a musician. He definitely had aspirations to be successful in a music career, but he was not driven by money, and he was quite happy and quite content to I don't think to say that he would settle is very fair on him, because I know that he wanted to be successful in music, but he was very happy to
settle from a monetary like perspective. Then, like my second relationship, the guy who was dating, he was very ambitious, saved a lot of money, was very very successful in his career, but wasn't very good at sharing that money with me, as in like he very much wanted things to be fifty to fifty, straight down the middle, and by fifty to fifty, he saw things as like I paid fifty percent, as in like if something cost ten dollars, I paid five dollars, he paid five dollars, and that's what he
saw as being fifty to fifty.
But it left me feeling really.
Resentful because at that time I wasn't earning a lot of money, and so when we would spend what was fifty to fifty, it always left me being broke and him being financially fine.
Yes, it wasn't relative to what you were earning, relative to your.
Salary and its it coused me a lot of stress. So I think that, like, there are different ways of approaching this depending on the personality and depending on the sort of the financial personality type. Whereas like Matt and I now, like we, as you guys learned earlier in this episode, we moved in together in a true baptism of fire. Like we moved in together, had to sort out our finances, had to be really open with things because we were having a freaking.
Baby as well.
Right, that was a whole nother spanner in the works. But we don't have a joint bank account yet, which I know some people will think is crazy, Like we don't have a joint bank account, but we are incredibly open with our income, and we're incredibly open with our savings. So I know everything that's in Matt's bank account, and he knows everything that's in mine, And we pay for everything financially fifty to fifty because we earned very similar amounts.
And the only reason why we haven't gotten a joint bank account yet is kind of because we're lazy. Yeah, I actually believe that we haven't gotten around to it, but we intend to continue to support each other and contribute fifty to fifty financially.
You know it could take you about ten minutes to do.
Ah, don't you start? I had this conversation with my sister yesterday.
I am going to start because A I care about you, but you hear about your financial stability.
It be because it's actually going to be my advice for people in your situation. And from everything that I've looked at, my advice and their professionals advice is that you have three accounts. You both have your own accounts, so you have your own financial independence, and you have a joint account and that is where you decide a percentage relative to your wage. So for you and Matt, it's even you earn the same sort of money, so you might just say, let's both put thirty percent in every week.
Every week, regardless of what your.
Other bills are, you put that amount of money in because you've picked an amount of money that you can afford, so you don't go crazy. Guys, if you get leftovers, you can add it later, but you just pick an amount that every week consistently can go in. Then you still have your own money to spend and do what you want with, and you can still add to it
and pay bills with it and whatever else. But it's I guess, A, it's a forced saving, and B it's something that sort of ties you together and makes you feel more financially stable.
I agree with all of.
That, because I do think that you should have a joint bank account if you live together. I think that that's what that's what your shared expenses should be coming out of. That's what your rent and your electricity and your food and all that stuff should be coming out of.
What I really want to highlight, which is what brit has said, but I really want to highlight the importance of when you're in a committed relationship and you've moved in with someone and you've started to merge your finances, sometimes it can seem really exciting, like it's the next step, you know, like it's really it solidifies the relationship that
you have a joint bank account. Like I don't know that sounds silly, but I remember with me like there was this little bit of me that was like, oh my god, he loves me so much because we have this joint bank account. But because I was like, I was living far outside my means to be able to match his salary. So the relationship I spoke about earlier, it meant that I didn't have any money siphoned off
in my own account. So I think it's really important to like stick to this idea of having three accounts. So he has his own separate account, you have a joint bank account, and you have your own account. Make sure that you have savings in your own bank account, and that's like your that's your security savings. That's so if you decide you want to leave the relationship because you're not happy anymore. And I know that's a really morbid way of looking at it, but you need to
have some security. Maybe it's not maybe it's so that you can go on that holiday you really want to. It can be for positive things as well, but I think that every single person needs to have some financial stability so that they're not ever in a position where they're vulnerable to their partner. And I think that that's
something to be really wary of. And I don't say this because I was, like, you know, under like the terrible spell of my ex, Like he was a really great guy, but I wasn't financially safe to leave the relationship when I wanted to, and that was a huge stress for me. When I decided I wanted to get out, I was like, well, I can't afford to leave. Everything I have is with him. Yeah, And I couldn't agree with that more. It's the way that my parents always
brought me up was to be like that. But I spoke to a financial planner this week, and they actually suggest is that you have two months minimum wage put aside for a rainy day minimum So if you lost your job, if there was a worldwide pandemic, which you know, as if that would happen, that's so crazy, So well, maybe you just need to buy some meritis ghost cheese in,
you know. But they do say to try and have two to three months put away for a rainy day, and then you pretend you don't have it, then you start your savings again. I understand that's not viable for everyone. I'm lucky that I don't have a lot of other things in my life, like I don't have a partner that I have a joint bank account with, I don't
have children and mortgages. So I actually followed the financial advice, and I saved and saved and saved, put that money away, and then I pretend I don't have it, And that has helped me out in this situation right now. And if I ever needed to leave a partner for any reason, it would help me for that. I was in a situation years ago where I wasn't this savvy and I wanted to leave a toxic relationship and I literally had no money, like I couldn't leave.
So I think that that's super, super super important.
Yeah, And we don't meet it from like a doom and gloom, like I know that sounds like a really negative way to get into a relationship. We're not saying put that money aside because you're going to need it when you want to get out. We're just saying, like, it's always good to have a backup. It's always good to have some sort of financial security on your own. And I think that as women especially, it's really important to make sure that that's something that you prioritize in
your life. Because as much as it's very flattering and it's very exciting to have a joint bank account and to start to really see your future with someone, it's also very important to have some protections in place. If things for whatever reason workwise relationship wise, bloody, natural, disaster wise, don't go to plan the next thing I kind of want to really sort of talk about and sit on for a little while. Here is the importance of setting a sexy budget. I love a sexy A sexy sexy budget.
Now a sexy budget, I don't know. It's definitely not sexy, and I hate budgeting. But I also think if you're going to start to have a joint bank account with someone, you guys are aligning your life goals and what you want in a relationship, and like you're thinking, hey, this guy's end goal or girl is and goal. Then I think it's really important to have a really open conversation about finances and about budgeting because maybe you guys want
to have like a bougie holiday every year. I need to stop saying boogie I so that like six times in this episode, maybe you guys want to have ever really fancy a fancy bougie holiday.
Maybe you really.
Want to save for a house, Maybe you just want to know that you have some savings there for a rainy day. Whatever it is, I think it's really important to be on the same page with how you're going to save your money, because resentment can kind of come from this idea of like having one person who thinks they're really good at saving and having the other person be very like frivolous and spending money on things that that one person in the relationship deems unnecessary. And what
can happen and it's a very slow burn. Is this like parenting voice where it's like, well, did you really need to go and buy that? Or like what are you doing that for? And you don't want that from your partner. You don't need that from your partner. You need some privacy. I know my parents forty two years married. They still have their own accounts. They pull their money for the bills and stuff, but they they can go and spend what they want without the other one knowing.
They would still tell each other, It's just that it's not like they're not looking through each other's accounts being like what was this?
What was this?
They trust each other enough that if they want to go and treat themselves to something, they can. So I was listening to some podcasts in preparation for this episode because of like, I only have my experiences with how I finance with my partners. But I was listening to this financial psychologist talking about how one of his clients had come in and the husband and the wife were
very different personality types. He was like crazy savor, and she was like pretty normal, Like she was like not going crazy, she wasn't spending too much money, normal living, yeah, just living. They had kids, she was living. They had had this massive fight because he had found a credit card, so she had been having like financial infidelity. She had a hidden credit card. That's what it's called financial infidelity.
Fund your cheating on me with your AMEX card. So she he had spent thirteen thousand dollars, which is no small sum of money, but she'd spent thirteen thousand dollars on a credit card that he didn't know about.
And then this financial psychologist was like, Okay, when you.
Come to the next session, I want you to bring your bank statement of what you have spent your money on, and we're going to go through it and we're going to talk about it. And so she came and she brought the bank statement. He'd already gone through it before the session, and he sat downe he was like cool, what is this charge for?
And it was like two hundred dollars.
At say kmart, and she was like, well, that was buying the kids uniforms and clothes for this event. And he was like okay, and what's this for And she was like, well that was for food for this event. And he looked through it and he was like, do you know what. All of these expenses are absolutely justifiable. And the fact that she needs to have a credit card because you're restricting her ability to spend this much, the issues on the husband, not on the wife.
Absolutely.
So I think that you, even if you are the person who really wants to save money, you've got to keep in mind that you don't want to save money at the sacrifice of your relationship. You still have to have fun and make memories and enjoy yourself along the way. But that sounds like she wasn't even having fun. She
was just buying the essentials for her children. Yeah, and she just got to a point where she was like, I'm so sick of having this argument with you day and day out about things that we need to have, so I'm just going to go and do it anyway, Which I think that that's a stair right. If you aggressively try and make someone do what you want them to do, people are just they just get over it. They're just going to do what they want behind your back.
Yeah.
We had one girl actually writing and she said that she's having a really, really tough time now, and she's been in this tough time for years. Her partner, she owns a lot more than him, and her partner basically has a severe gambling problem, and to the point that she can't even give him twenty dollars to go and get milk and bread because he won't come back for two hours and he would have just spent it at the tab.
Oh my god.
Yeah, So it's quite severe, and it's to the point now that he just won't ever have money, so she pays for everything. And she said that this has been going on for years now. I really feel for her, And obviously we don't know the ins and outs of that relationship, but on a surface level, my mind is a bit like I would have left. I would have been like, they're not married, throwing her money down the drain.
So yeah, like I mean, I hate just like coming to some of these questions and being like, oh no, leave him.
But then in this con situation like leave him. But no, but I think, like you, the fact that he's doing that, Yes, it's an illness and it's something that he needs to seek help for and you can help him through this. You can go to a counselor.
I think that this is like a very isolated situation where like he needs to go and get some.
Help for that.
But there is so much inherent lying in that. There's so much betrayal in that, there's so much disrespect in that that, there's so many levels being taken advantage of in that that I think at some point you have to prioritize what's important to.
You over over like that's terrible.
Yeah, you definitely need to have a point. I think in this situation, this is where we would say, don't have a joint bank account because you will literally be saying goodbye to all your money. But it's just interesting to see how many levels there are two financial stresses
in relationships. And we understand you're probably listening now and you know that you have your own financial stresses with your relationship, and it might be mainstream like we've just said, like someone just throws more money away than the other it might be a lot deeper, like drug problems and gambling problems. And I think that's why it's important for us to say we wanted to touch on everything, because
there's no right answer for every relationship. There's The best thing I ever did, to be honest, was call up a financial advisor. I did that years and years and years ago, and that was just me on my own because I wanted to make my money work for me. We all work so hard, we all are grinding out there just good enough to live. So my advice is, call a financial advisor, call a planner. You go through everything with them, and they start to budget for you.
They start to tell you where your money could be going to work better for you, and they just give you a better understanding of how to grow as a couple. Yeah, and you can do this as a relationship. You can do this as a couple as well. Like Matt and I recently, we've started to go and see a financial advisor because we're not very good with our money and we need someone to.
Be like, this is how you do it, because you're doing it wrong. I guess on that as well. Another question, we get a lot and I.
Guess it's a bit difficult to navigate, is what happens when the woman does earn more. A lot of women feel uncomfortable with that. A lot of men feel uncomfortable
with that. I have definitely dated people where I have been the higher income earner, and it hasn't bothered me because if I'm happy and I know they're working hard, like you just said, if they're not lazy and they're working hard and they're doing their passion, it doesn't matter really what they're earning, because I can see that they're trying their hardest. I think in this situation it affects
the men more. I feel like a lot of them feel inferior or not as masculine because we've always been brought up to think that the men, that men are the breadwinners. So I think this is a struggle with
a lot of relationship. Being to Matt about this as well, when we were doing some reach search for this episode, I was saying to Matt, like, you know, why is it that, and like people who we know, like you know, I've we have great friends who the guy pays for a lot more than the girl, even sometimes when she has a really, really great job as well, but like it just seems to be that gender norm where the man pays for more. And Matt said that like his opinion on it, which I kind of agree as well,
is like there is power in that. There's power in paying for someone because like you then dictate where you go on holidays, you then dictate where you eat, You then dictate.
What you're buying and what you're doing.
And so I do kind of agree with this like power play that comes from a financial like perspective as well in relationships and how that's always been geared towards the man. After everything I've read and looked up and researched, I'm really big on and what I will do one day when that lucky man comes into my life, ding ding shout out, when he comes into my life, I am going to be of the person that I think you have the joint account, but you you pick percentage
this relative to both of you. So if one of who's one hundred grand, one's on fifty grand, you both just put in thirty percent of that and it's relative. And I think that is absolutely from every single option I have read, I think that is the best and fairest way to maintain a healthy relationship when you're not fighting about money, because this the financial stress on each individual is exactly the same.
And then you take it in turns.
One of you might take your one out to dinner, and then the woman can take him out the next time. But I definitely think that from everything I've seen, that's what I That's what I'm one hundred percent going to do. Laura, you should get on that joint account. But now we don't have a joint account. Like I'm there with you. I totally totally agree with everything you said, because we do split everything fifty to fifty and like the most reasonable and like we we that's what we do, you know,
That's how we approach our finances and our relationship. Matt doesn't pay for any more than me, and I don't pay for any more than him. We really kind of just take it in turns. And and i' think I
wanted to touch on. Another listener wrote in saying that she's having some troubles with her partner, her husband husband, because she had a baby eight months ago, so she's a stay at home mum and he has made some like snipy sort of comments here and there, about how she's not contributing as much financially.
That blew my mind.
How is she supposed to be contributing financially when she is a stay at home mum, Like, there has to be a point when you're in a relationship with kids
that your money, my money, becomes our money. I think that this is a common issue though, I really do, and like I know that that sort of paint as a modern woman as a feminist, Like that pains me because I do think that there is still a culture that happens where men are going to work and then they think, Oh, you're just home all day playing with the baby, and it's really fun and it's really great.
But you know, like it's, as any mum knows, spending all day with your own child, who you love to death, but spending all day every day and not.
Getting a break.
It's actually maddening for all different reasons, because it's so it's they require so much of you, and you really lose your own identity, and you really lose your sleep, and you lose so much of yourself in spending all your time with your child. So I think if you're the one who is doing the full time parenting while your partner works, like that's a job because otherwise your kid would be in daycare and you'd be back at work. So I don't I don't have the answers to that.
I don't know how you get your husband to respect you more other than potentially going to counseling or potentially trying to explain to him what you do during the day and how much work you have, like how much work staying at home and being a mom actually takes.
You know.
I had this one, this one woman who was friends of Matt's mum, so her husband had made a comment that she, you know exactly, that she doesn't do anything, liked they have two kids, and it was like, you don't do anything. I work so hard you're at home with the kids, and then you complain and you make it out like it's such a difficult job. And she was like, right, So she didn't. She didn't do one
single thing at all. So she took care of the kids and did the bare minimum, but she didn't She didn't wipe the floors, she didn't pick one thing up when it landed on the ground. She just didn't do any thing. No washing, no cleaning, no three days didn't touch a thing, and he was like, what the fuck is happening to this place? And she was like, yeah, this is what I do every single day. Fucking Mike Trace. Is it like this house is an absolute pig style.
I spent all freaking day running around cleaning and making sure that this home and this life is exactly how you want to live it. Maybe you can do that to set an example or to make a point and just not do any cleaning or cooking or anything for a little while until that really drives a home. But maybe that's passive aggressive, and we don't encourage that. But there's a difference with being passive. No, I don't think it'sassive aggressive. It's some people are visual people. Some people
need to physically see a result. So maybe the man your husband actually needs to visually see. Oh, I can see now what you must do because when you walk into a clean house, you don't you don't. You know it's clean, but you don't think about what went into it. When you walk into a dirty house, you're like, what the hell, Like why totally you know. There's a difference. So I think I'm all for that. I don't think
that's passive aggressive. I think that's just like I'm just going to show you for one weekend, or give him the kids for the weekend, twenty four hours a day and just golladay, just go have a weekend with the girls, drink some prosecco and just have the best time.
You'll be kissing your butt when you get back.
Like, we don't have the answer for this, but I honestly do think that that is something that so many new mums go through, and I think that that is an often recurrent point of contention in relationships, where there's this inequality in work, like my because I go to work, my work's more important, and because you stay here, your work is easier.
Okay, moving along one more step. Prenups. What do you think of the old prenup?
Oh? I think that every situation is so different. I think it's really difficult to kind of say what is right and wrong. I don't have the sort of crazy savings that are so different to what Matt owns that we need to do a prenup, do you know? But I think that there are circumstances where someone has worked incredibly hard, or they've been inherited a hell a lot of money and their situation is something that like we can't relate to because like maybe they're the heir to
a bloody fortune and they need to protect that. So I think that they're valid, and I think that I think the fact that one in three marriages ends in divorce is a testament to the fact that prenups are necessary. So I think there's there's so many levels and like,
I mean, we can't discuss at all. Of course, they're pretty confronting and they can be a bit upsetting when your partner says, like, let's sign a prenup, you're sort of like, whoa are you thinking this is going to be doomed before it's actually doomed.
That's probably not what it is.
I think a prenup is okay if it takes into consideration like maybe your partner earns, maybe they have a fortune. As long as a prenup takes into consideration the fact that maybe for five years you're at home not earning your own money because you've got kids, there has to be something in it that's going to protect you to a point you don't have to lead him out.
And everything totally. Do you know, actually, Laura.
Well, like if a prenup is just like, hey, if we break up, I get everything that's mine and you don't get anything, then that's a piece of shit. But if the prenup is like, Okay, we acknowledge that I have a lot of money and if we break up, I'm going to take care of you. But to this extent, fine, you're still taking care of You're still getting something. But it's saying like, you know, let's be real about this. You know, so I know you're not marrying me because
I'm a filthy rich millionaire. Yeah, I didn't tell you this, and this didn't make it to air on The Bachelor, But Nick and I were having this conversation like this one on one, really nice time, and he just says to me, what like.
I just want to say, like what do you think of pre nups? And I was like, oh, Nick, I don't earn that much. You don't need to worry about that. I just made me think. It was like I was gonna write a.
Prenup in my head as fully, and in my head I was like, Okay, why did he ask me? Basically, if he was like, would you sign a prenup, that's what he said, would I sign one and he was like, this is not finale like this a.
Few before, and I was like, WHOA.
I even went back to the other girls and I was like, has Nicko asked any of you signed a prenup?
And they're like no. I was like, that is so weird, so weird, And I don't know.
We never got into it enough that I don't know if it was a general throwaway. I don't know if he was like actually saying he has enough that he wants prenup.
I don't know.
I mean, I'm not going to choose anyone at the end, but I'd just like to know if you're trying to get meothetically, if I was going to pick someone, would you sign on? That's crazy, though maybe that's like a positive thing. I think that there is a testament to the fact that you should openly talk about finances at different points in your relationship. Not too early on, because I think it can be a bit of a moodkiller.
But not when you're still dating five other people.
Well yeah, but when when you guys are moving in together, when you're starting to get really serious about merging your life, that's when finance becomes so important and that's been talking about and making sure that you're on the same page with things.
Is so imperative to having a happy life together.
So what if one person does make more? Because a woman named Kelly Long, she's a member of the National CPA Finance Literacy Commission, and she just states that basically, it's almost inevitable that one person is going to earn significantly more than the other person, and those amounts might vary widely, but it also might vary throughout the relationship, Like there might be one point where you're earning more and maybe there's a point where your partner's earning more.
Yeah, exactly.
And so if this does happen, and if this is in your relationship, is it fair in this case to split a mortgage.
Fifty to fifty? For example?
Is it fair to split the bill fifty to fifty? And fair doesn't necessarily mean equal, no, it means percentages.
Ay.
But I mean this comes back to what we were saying earlier on in the beginning, especially like where I was saying about my partner, where I felt financially stressed because we were doing the fifty to fifty split, but financial to the dollar fifty to fifty. I think that
that's a really, really great take home from this. And if you do take one thing home, it's that when you merge your expenses and if you do have hugely different incomes, then doing a percentage split is a much fairer way of splitting your income than doing a dollar for dollar split. Absolutely, And I did put some questions out for you guys, some polls on Instagram because I wanted the general public feedback, and because we're just so well researched, we have to we leave no stone unturned.
No question on Instagram unanswered.
I did have to turn off the responses because you guys were overwhelming. But before this is the result.
Should a relationship be fifty to fifty? Sixty seven percent said yes.
I lie that sixty seven percent said yes without any other details. They're like, should a relationship be fifty to fifty? And there is thirty three percent of people out there being.
Like, nah, he can pay more? Exactly, I mean yes, no, poll now dot there shouldn't be fifty to fifty. That's the person that earns more, pay more.
Yes, And only fifty one percent of people said no, I know.
Wow, that one.
Weirs me out that weeds me out too. So if someone earns more, there is forty nine percent of people out there as who are saying no.
And I bet you they're the forty nine percent who earned more. Yeah, they would be for sure.
Do you share a bank account with your partner, Laura, this is you? Fifty percent said yes, So forty nine percent people still are in a relationship and don't share a bank account with a partner. I actually found that really interesting. But also these questions don't really take into account the depth or of the relationship. That don't take into account how long you've been together, the seriousness any
of those things. So I think like at a base level, this was just a whole lot of people saying yes, no, yes, no.
But I mean I wanted I just wanted a general feel of where people were at. Yeah, and fifty one said that they do.
And lastly, and I found this really interesting, only twenty five percent of you that are in long term relationships said money is what you fight about most. That's actually a huge statistic, So like twenty five per cent higher. Yeah, But I mean most of our audience is relatively young, and I think that the older you get, the more that money becomes something that you will significantly fight about.
So the fact that quarter of you are already finding about money and you're only probably relatively I'm not gonna say you're new to your relationship, but go around. You're in your thirties, probably you're new to life.
So like you know, you know, we don't have.
Like the full spectrum of all the shit that life puts on us yet. So I reckon that the older we get, the more that that number is going to grow. So I think for a quarter of our listeners to be affected by financial problems their relationships, that is huge. So I really hope one in four of you found this interesting. We hope one in four of you aren't something. We hope one in four of you will put that into place and save your relationship.
There you go.
I wanted to tell you guys about some apps that I looked up. They are directed mainly at couples. You can use them as singles as well, but essentially it's like money budgeting, money sharing, way to split and pay each other, way to keep track of things. But these are some of the top apps that were recommended. So some of them are freeze and some of them have like an upgraded paid version where you can access more features. But a few of them are Pocketbook, Good Budget, Pocketsmith, Money Lover.
I've used Pocketbook before, have you do you love it? Yeah?
I mean if you're somebody who needs a bit of assistance with budgeting and needs a little bit of assistance for their finances, then there are so many solutions out there. Another thing that I recommend as well, if you haven't read it, read it. It's The Food Investor. Investor. It's so good. It's actually really really like. Money can be very confusing, it can seem like very overwhelming to get into, and like a lot of finance books are just too wordy,
too difficult. Later, The Barefoot Investor is a great book. It just makes finance very very tactile. If you haven't read it, this is going to be your three hundred and seventy fourth recommendation for that book, because I'm pretty
sure everyone recommends it. And then, lastly, my recommendation for a relationship and if you are at the point where you're starting to merge your finances, my recommendation is that you do what they call a money huddle, which is every so often, maybe once a month, maybe once every two to three months, sit down, have a glass of wine, have dinner with your partner, and talk about your money.
Talk about what you're saving for, talk about what you're looking forward to, whether it be holidays, a house, your kids, whatever it is. But just make sure that you're checking in every so often like you would in all other aspects of your relationship, to make sure that you're aligned and you're saving for the same things, and you care about the same things, and you're moving forward, not just in your relationship, but in your money. Honey, and open
goal setting huddle. What I don't know, I haven't humbled before.
I was just trying to you on it. A lot of money huddle. Yeah, like I'm open an open communication huddle. Oh I'm sorry. I huddle myself to sleep.
All right, guys, we have a little bit of some disappointing news for you. If you've made it to this point in an episode, which of course you have because you know it's great. We are not going to be doing an ask uncut episode this week. Just life and work and everything has become a little bit too mental. So look, if things kind of clear up before Wednesday and we're able to get an ask uncut episode out
to you, and we will. But at the moment, it's just like I'm getting mad anxiety by all the work that's piling up, so I kind of need a bit of a break.
It's a super super big week for both of us.
I'm actually starting a new job at a new hospital as well. I'm still at the old hospital that I was at. I'm not going to tell anyone where I'm at because I don't want anyone to turn up there, but I'm starting in everyone everyone flocks to Britney's wags.
Is that Bretty from The Bachelor? No, I actually had a I actually had a proper talker.
Wow, yeah, he it was. It was pretty big. He'd been in jail before. He had like a taddy on his face, you know how they get the tear drops and stuff.
Yeah, killed the man. I couldn't leave.
He had called up and put in a threat, a death threat, and it was a.
Really big deal.
I couldn't I couldn't work nights. I couldn't walk to the car park by myself without security. It was like a huge deal. So I, yeah, I genuinely don't tell people where I am.
How have I never heard this story. I don't know. I don't really talk about it.
I've had some of a rough life, made a wild Also, you know what, this is an international podcast, so it really will go far and wide. We're gonna try and get you the asking cut. But I just wanted to pray. I just wanted to put it out there justin case we're not able to do it. But before we ago, you know that we have also up finish an episode without our suck and our sweet.
Should I say that again, just in case.
Absolutely need to say that again, I'm leaving it. Okay, we don't finish an episode without our suck and our sweet, the highlights, the lowlights, the best and the worst of our week.
All right, you can kick it off. Okay, my suck.
Would have to be just the story that I told at the start, where I just said I did like some runny split thing on my cement. I feel like I've broken my toes into the door. And I'm only bringing this up again now because it happened on my way here, and my foot since we've been recording this podcast is throbbing. So I broke my toes in Amazon Jungle a few years ago, Chasing pigs another story. I was chasing these wild pigs and I broke my foot.
My sister had to carry me out. Ever since then, they've been really sensitive and I'm pretty sure like I've just rebroken that toe, that that's.
A soul really stucky.
Yeah, Like I don't think it's broken. Are you exaggerating? Are we gonna have to go to the hospital after this? I broken toe. You don't to is generally unless they displaced, which I can tell it's not. I just feel like it might have like recracked. I mean, this is my job. I do the X rays, but they don't do anything. You just strap it and chill.
So I don't know.
It's just very very tender. It's probably not broken, but that's my suck like it was.
It was funny.
I would have taken a really big hit to my pride had anyone been there, but they weren't.
But that's the worst things happened to me.
It also just shows like what a fucking trooper brit is and how dedicated she is to the course.
She just broke her toe.
She broke her toe, and then she came here and recorded this episode, Like what a trooper. I broke my foot in the jungle and then I went on like a three day hike with it.
That's outrageous. It was ridiculous, ridiculous anyway, do.
You know I'm gonna like Hyji, you know what you're suck also should be them because you slipped over.
Tell me the weather here, although it was because of the weather. Yeah, the weather is horrific.
So like we we kind of like know guys, we live in Bandai in case you didn't know, we're that obnoxious, But we missed the end of summer, like summer kind of ended because we all went into lockdown. And now literally the day that schools have gone back and like things are starting to get back to normal, it is piercing down here. It's been torrential for like the past week. It's so cold, it's baltic and I feel like we've been robbed. We have, I mean, we were robbed of
twenty twenty. Twenty twenty is we're just gonna that was my phone. We've been robbed of twenty twenty.
I feel like we just everyone just forgets that happened. Yeah, let's just start again. Blank Slate twenty twenty one.
Sweet You're sweet, My sweet would have to just be the fact that I got these new apartment and I'm moving in a couple of weeks, and the facts that I own nothing. A. This sucks because my bank account is already crying.
But it's also.
Amazing because I loving terias and I love of starting fresh and creating a new energy, and I can pick every single thing in my whole house, which is a it's daunting, and it's expensive, and I will be eating tuna for a.
While, but it's exciting.
It's also like a really nice blank space to be able to like make whatever you want of it.
Exactly amazing.
What opportunity if you're furniture business out there and you want someone to sponsor you.
Brinie's hustling. It wasn't even a hustle, but like I wouldn't say, no, girl's gotta eat. What's what's your suck?
Okay, my suck is my My suck is. Also it's also a personal injury I set up there with mine. No, it's pretty pretty pathetic in comparison, but I burnt my arm cooking yesterday. And one it's a bit of a sore spot because it's actually a sore spot, but Secondly, it's because I'm just such a terrible cook that I always managed something, always manages to go wrong. Show me in the burn, you're gonna laugh at me. It's not that I went laugh cute.
I had a pretty good week. Okay, it's a pretty burn, but it burns hurt, man, Yes they hurt.
And also, like this week, this week, nothing is wrong, Like I know that I just said that I've had so much like surmounting work and stuff. Then I'm like drowning in my anxiety about things. But from like, nothing bad has happened. This week has been a pretty good week. So I can't complain about that.
Love that for you.
Just busy, just really really busy, feel like I can't catch a breath. My sweet, My sweet, is as much as I complained about it at the beginning of the episode. The whole teething thing, it's pretty fun. Marley has fully popped out two teeth. She's almost twelve months old, should be twelve months on the nineteenth of June, and she's just grown her first two teeth in like one little go. And it's so exciting because it's like the next chapter and and oh my god, I'm turning until her mom, Oh,
I'm going to get full more on you guys. She also learned how to give a kiss properly, so now she purses her lips and goes It's so cute.
I could die.
I mean, she's been kissing for a while, but she sort of just like opens her mouth and puts it on your face, just passes you. She's got no chill, MiG no chill. I'm so obsessed with her. I might try and kidstrong the way. Oh no, social distancing. I absolutely will not.
Keep it to yourself, Brittany. Guys, thank you so much for tuning in. We actually really enjoyed this episode. A little bit different, but I loved it.
I hope you guys learned something, and I hope you guys are on the way to a successful financial.
Relationship, financial freedom. We want you to find financial love.
To every single person who's left a review recently, we like we say it all the time, but we're so incredibly grateful, Like it's just humbling to read the amazing reviews that you leave us, and it also like it's a real confidence boost for us. It also makes us want to keep creating this content for you. So if you listen to every episode, or you're a big old fan of the podcast and you haven't left a review yet, then please go ahead leave a review. We would really
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Well all a lie, I fucked it up. Let's try that one more time.
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