Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands were never seated. We pay our respects to their elders past and present.
Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land. This episode was recorded on de Rug Wallamuta Land. Hi eyes, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut.
I'm Laura.
It's almost like you forgot what to say then, I'm Laura. I'm Britney. I have been living in hell for the last three days. Wow, we just jump and right, I'm in hell. That's where my life is now. It's literally about to be Christmas holidays. Hohe fucking hell. Hell no. I we decided, we made it the big decision to wean Lola off dummies.
Oh my god, I thought you're gonna say I'm another kid or something.
Oh god, I can't know. This has been the weekend that's traumatized me from ever wanting to have any more children.
Oh, this is the weekend where you like, if there was any inkling of maybe we could do this again, it's been taken away.
It's been ripped from the rubs. The rub you have rubbed, he will will not be rubbing. The rug has been.
Ripped from underneath you.
So I mentioned this a couple of weeks ago. Lola, she's almost three, and she's still on the dummy, like obsessed with the dummy. Also still has a warm bottle of water at nighttime, which she calls my baby bottle. And she's three in February.
So we say that thirty six months, No, thirty four months. We only talk in months, remembering to our kids, like seven.
I don't do I did stand in maths at school and then I dropped out, So I mean, it's not my foretastes. Okay, she's almost three. The dummy has been well expired. I think they say that you should wan them off within the first year, and then by the time they're three, it really fucks their teeth up. But you know what, it's a coping mechanism for her and for me, and it's gotten me through some hard time.
She's not gonna have any teeth, but she'll be a good kid now she'll have teeth, they'll just be really splayed out, like kind of thing, like a little duck beak. That's like ham. That's not fair. No, I know I did that to her anyway. I spoke about it on here and then shortly afterwards, I had a whole lot of guilt around the fact that I'm the one who's allowing her to have a dummy because it makes my life easier, also her life, arguably, but it's good for me.
You know, she sleeps through the night. The dummies for you, not her. Anytime she's crying, shove that thing in. It's more a copy mechanism for me. Yeah. And so on Friday night this has in like just passed, something washed over me, and I decided, tonight's to night. We're gonna do it. We're gonna go cold turkey, We're gonna a whole hog. Where does that come from? Do you know what?
I know exactly where it came from. It came from Lola was having a tantrum in the bath and then she hit me in the face and said I want my dummy, And I was like, cool, I think maybe no dummy. Now, Okay, you're looking at it really shocked. Do kids hit their parents in their face? Yeah, all the time. Kid's a brutal man. What little shit. Yeah, Laula kicked me last night. I mean, like, she's a kid, So I don't take it to heart to kick a back. She's like, a man, does you have I feel no,
because that's legal. Yeah, So okay, I took the dummies off far I was gonna do. I've tried the whole dummy fairy before. I've tried the like buried in the garden and then lollipops grew out of it, like I've tried to wean her before, but the regalit fer is it out of the garden. No, Everyone's kind of like, oh,
there's this like process. You can pretend like the dummy fairy came and took the dummies away, or you can put them in the garden and then lollipops grow out and then the kids are so excited because you know they've traded the dummy for something else. There is nothing on planet Earth that my child wants more than a dummy, So there's no bribery that's going to work in this situation. So you actually did yourself a disservice, like by holding onto it longer, it's been a bit easier for you.
But now she's old enough to completely comprehend that something's better with it. Oh she misses it now because she's too old totally. So Friday Night she screamed bloody murder for one and a half hour intervals, four separate intervals, so she didn't sleep. Basically, that math is six hours, six hours of screaming scream. And I'd go in there every set of five minutes, ten minutes like pat, pat pat, cuddle, scream, cuddle, scream, cuttle scream. And what did you say? I said, I'm
so sorry, honey, no more dummies. Were a big girl. We're a big girl now, she said, over and over. So that happened on Friday night, Saturday night. Surprisingly, it was a lot better. I did bribe her with toys on Saturday and things were a little bit better. And then Sunday night it's been manageable, but not great.
So you were you didn't go down the track of anything. You just said it's time, you're a big girl.
You didn't. There was no fairy, there was no buster ate it, there was no I'll make a trade. Nah just went cold turkey. Does that make me a bad mum? It's been pretty brutal. No, I actually don't think it makes you a bad mum. I think it's like kids have to learn, says Britt. Britt, the girl who just asked, did you kick it back?
Yeah, well, obviously that was a joke. I do not support abuse.
Yeah, it was a very much jokes, guys. I don't know. I didn't feel like we're at the point where I needed to make that joke and say that was joke. In case you knew a life on cut. I guess I was just surprised. I do think it's good for you.
I'm not a parent, obviously no, but I think it's really good sometimes to not make up these things for kids. Not to be like, oh my god, like something took it away, but to be like, hey, you know what, this is what happens.
You go through a point in life where you grow up and you don't need it anymore. Yeah, it's resilient because that life. Man, people take shit from you and you don't get it back, and there's no reason earth it's not fair, and that is life. This is gonna be one of those moments in life that actually makes her a better human because imagine if she was twenty five years old and still suck in a dummy. Oh, Laura, that you would go down for abuse if your kids still had a dummy.
But you know there are kids there are kids. Is still breastfeed at like ten years old?
You know that. I don't think ten. But I'll tell you something. There was that groom that was bread feeding at his wedding. No, do you know what. I think that was an urban legend. I know we spoke about it on radio, but I don't. I cannot believe.
I'm pretty sure it was in Dolly magazine sealed section.
I think it was real. I can't believe that that was true. But I will tell you guys something. No shame to anyone who breastfeeds for a really long time because I was three and a half.
No shame if you're breastfeeding your son and his wedding, shame.
Okay, I'm calling bullshit. Shame on you. If your child is forty five and you're still breastfeeding and he can say bitty, I would say that that's probably a problem. No. I was breastfed until I was three and a half.
Three and a half. That's really old. That's like almost Mali, like Marley's four and a half, but like three and a half is a fully functioning little human that can like anyway, Apparently, we were on a bus and I was trying to rip my mum's shirt open and I was like, give me your boob, and that was when she realized that maybe she should stop breastfeeding me. No, I do you know what, I actually think three is not that uncommon.
And I genuinely mean that.
I have a lot of friends that have breastfed till two and a half three. It depends on what culture. I think it's just Australian No, But in Australia it is not unusual. I mean again, in Australia, it's unusual. Most people don't breastfeed for that long most people. And I think that if you are breastfeeding your kids at that age, you're definitely not doing it in public. You're doing it as like a wine down time at night
time or something. You know, it's usually something that you kind of maybe you stop sharing it with people because people start to be a little bit like pooh pooh, Okay, I'll remember that if that day ever comes to me. I feel like I'm gonna be that person of breastfeeds for five minutes and I'm.
Like, oh, I'm scat off my tit.
That was me. I got to four months and I was like, I'm really I don't know. Some people love it and it's sacred and it's beautiful and it's such a bonding moment.
I'd be more doing it to get my own metabolism back.
Jake, Ohkah. I made it to four months, and I, like I said, I know that some people find it's like a real connection and bonding moment, and we are all led to believe that it's going to be this incredible motherly thing that you're gonna want to do. I just didn't like it. I did not enjoy it, and I know that it's very necessary, so take that back.
I take it back because we are so shamed into thinking that that's the only way of providing for your children, and that if the reason why you stop breastfeeding is because you don't enjoy it, then you're somehow a worse mother. I got to four and a half months or maybe five months with Mali and four months with Lola, and you know what, My kids were bottle fed on formula and they are fine. One of them is still on a dummy, but they're fine with a left, right, and center.
I just laughed so hard. I don't know if you saw that happen.
I just laughed so hard that my hand flung past my own mouth into a tooth and I cut my.
Finger open, speaking of snaggle teeth.
I don't remember how it happened. I prop a blood on my face. My finger is cut open and bleeding from my own hysteria.
Also, the one thing I do want to say is I went and got my nails done yesterday for like holiday nails, and I had this image in my head of what was gonna look like. And they're the ugliest nails I've ever gotten. There I have to do so I cannot go away with them. Can I show you?
I'm glad you haven't noticed yet, show me.
Do you know what it was? Chloe Fisher.
I saw a picture from Chloe Fisher and she had these really cute nails. So I took a screenshot and I, you know how like you have an idea when you order something online of what something's gonna look like because it looks amazing on the model.
Like what I ordered and what I received it's exactly that. And so I went into the place. Doesn't help with my fingers, but I went into the place and I was like, I like this vibe and they look nothing like it and they hit it. Can I say something, You're gonna take this as an offensive thing, And I don't mean it as offensive. If you're about to say something highly effects, you just have really bulbous nails. So this is not a good look for you. I do I have?
Well this is And I even said to them, they're really thick, and I said, hey, I don't want thick ones. So what's the thinnest thing you've got, like in terms of like acrylics.
It's in there.
So because I don't know, I'm not that good at girly girly stuff, so I always ask them. I don't know what I ever want. They're fucking ugly, man. I need to go and fix them tomorrow. I have my mom's fingers, sorry, MoMA. Like, if I ever get engaged, I'm gonna have to photoshop someone's hand onto my wrist.
If you guys don't know, brit is going over to Scotland, brit he's not engaged. She's not engaged. She's going over to Scotland to spend Christmas with Ben. So they're gonna I mean, you're away for like eight weeks now and then yeah, So if for some reason or if this is the time that Ben does propose to you, you can't have those ugly hoops. Ben is definitely not proposing this time, but irrelevant, I cannot have these fingers.
What would you do if you did propose? Obviously say no, I mean it's too soon, Come.
Bitch, please, I'd be all over that like.
A rash, like one hundred percent. This is the love of my life mL hashtag love of my life.
Yeah, oh my gosh, speaking to Ben, I don't think I said this.
I don't think I said this at all. Correct me if I'm wrong. We recently had our one year anniversary.
He was here for it.
So it was when I was doing my egg freezing. Happened to fall in that three days, which I felt like was which was a sign from the gods right because he wasn't supposed to be able to come, but he made this really big effort to come for my egg freezing just for that three day period and it fell in that period our anniversary, So I was like, amazing, beautiful special on the day I had gone and bought him.
Now I know this sounds extra, and it is extra, but it was our anniversary and I'm love and Ben likes fashion.
I bought him a Prata bucket hat.
It was expensive, but I knew he was gonna love it, and he does love it.
I don't know a single person in this world who has a part of bucket hair.
Yeah, Fisher, he loves DJ Fisher Okay, and Fisher only wears bucket hat.
He just loved her. He just fucking loves it. And I was like, it's special, you know.
So I wrote him this really long, beautiful letter where I poured my heart out and I put so many emotions into it, and then I read him a card as well.
The letter was extra. Then I read him a beautiful card.
Then I got him this hat and it was wrapped up in his beautiful hat box and it had ribbons and it was so amazing. So I was so excited to have this exchange with each other that it.
Was the night before and I was like, do you just want your present now?
Because I want you to use it over the weekend, over the couple of days that you hear And he's like, okay, sure, So I got in this present.
You know, when you know you've nailed it. Yeah, So I'm a bad present giver, So no, I'm never that. I never had that feeling. I knew I nailed it, and I knew can't. I just fucking knew it.
So I was pumped.
Anyway, he loved it, and then I was like looking at him and I was like, do you want to give me mine now?
He goes, oh, if you want it now? I was like, well, yeah, because that's what we're doing. I'm excited.
So puts his hand in his bag and just pulls out a box of perfume and it's not wrapped, and he hands it to me and I was like, oh, thinking this must be the pre gift to the gift and I was like, should I do the card first? And he's like, oh, there is no card and I was like, oh, this is the Rouleta. He's like no. I was like, oh, okay, the guy just flew across the fucking world way the wait.
So I opened the perfume. Beautiful, It's like a lovely perfume and I was.
Like, but it wasn't wrapped her. It was just weird. It wasn't wrapped or anything. He just came straight.
He just handed me the perfume and I was like, did you just get this last night at Judy Free in the airport and he's like, yeah, I did. And I was like, oh, okay, thank you. And I was so disappointed. And I thought that the present would come the next day and it didn't come, which is.
Fine, right, Like it's fine, but I had put so much effort into it. Okay, it was not fine. I'd put so much effort into it. And then I said to him, I actually asked him.
I said, so you just got there from g Freed, so you didn't actually remember it was the anniversary. He didn't put any thought into it. And he said, no, you told me, let's not get presents. We won't get each other presence, like we love each other.
That's enough.
I was like, Ben, if a woman says don't get me a present, she obviously means get me a present. Like no woman in the history of don't get me a present means don't get me a present.
I am the exception to this. I am because it's like a path. No, it depends on if you Okay, if you're a love language person. I am not a gift person. I don't care for gifts. So Matt and I will often say, don't get each other a present, and then we actually don't get each other presence, and it's really relieving that one person didn't go against it, because if you've decided not to get presents and then one person still gets one, it makes you feel like the asshole.
But you said no presence, Okay.
Firstly, I said to him, I don't think I ever would have actually said that I did. I was like, I don't think that came out of my mouth. Maybe I said it for Christmas because we're not going to get each other Christmas presents because that is expensive, right, we are flying to each other whatever.
But an anniversary present.
I was like, Ben, I don't think I ever would have said that. Secondly, if I did say that, never, don't get me a present, like you should know better, like you should know me enough by now that that is not a Brittany Hockley way of living. So he thinks in his brain that he was doing the extra because he thought, oh, I get it, she doesn't want a present, so I'll just get her duty free perfume.
And it made me think we as women, I.
Mean, I'm sure men do too, but we say.
So many things that actually have no connection to the meaning whatsoever.
This is like the equivalent of girl math. It's like girl language.
We have a whole nother dialogue that means something completely different to what we.
Say, Oh yeah, mineus, I have a headache. Actually just means I don't want to have sex? Yes tonight? So true. Like when you're in an argument or something, you know, if like you're giving them the silent treatment and they're like, babe, what's wrong, You're like.
Nothing, I'm fine, I'm fine.
Everything is not fine.
The floor is fucking lava. Everything is not fine.
I am about to divorce you. We have so far from being fine that way. Your father shit. I've been thinking about this and there are actually so many things that I know why I do, and I know every woman does.
I'm not hungry, Hey babe, do you want me to get you something on the way home? No, I'm not hungry.
Always get them a burger. They are going to eat your food.
No. Do you know what the equivalent of this is? This is not not that are you hungry? It's a do you want anything? When your partner's ordering something at a cafe, do you want anything? And they say no, I'm fine. You fucking know you know that I'm going to eat your chips and don't be mad when I do it and pretend like you didn't expect this.
Yeah, because then I always say you said you didn't want anything. I evidently didn't mean it.
Of course I didn't want anything, and then you got chips, and now I want them. I didn't want my own. I wanted to eat yours because I don't want so much of them that I want to whole serve. But I want you to share with me because you love me. That is absolutely the equivalent of mine and MAT's relationship. Matts so far now he won't even ask me, He'll just order a second or whatever he's having. Yes, he refuses to share with me. Yeah again. Okay on the food thing, what do you feel like eating?
Oh?
Whatever, baby you pick? Okay, what about pepperinizza? I don't like pepperini? Okay?
Do you want to get a would never bear a hot dug?
So you do care? No, because you don't care so long it's within the framework of a specific selection of foods, and your partner should know the types of things that you like to eat. Like if you say, oh, I don't care, it's clearly obviously going to be Italian tie or Mexican, Like there's no other options. You can't say, Oh, we're going to get a fucking Chipotle tonight. You're like, no, that wasn't. I don't care so long it's within our normal selection of foods that are on offer. Yes, this
is a good one. I just want a guy that makes me laugh.
What you mean is you, in fact want a guy that is emotionally stable, who's also a smoke show hot, who's also financially stable, but is also slightly funny occasionally and doesn't cheat on me and doesn't cheat on me.
That is what you want. One of the ones that I think I do matter is I'll say to him, do you want to drive? Do you want to drive? In our world means I am not driving. I don't want to. It's not a question. It is a request you will drive today? Yeah, but I also hate driving all the time. So the fact that I ever have to ask him, like, once again, why didn't you read my mind? Yeah, that's on you. That's a you problem. That's not a me problem.
Absolutely not. It's not a you language problem at all. No, Okay, do you want to lift home? Oh it's okay, I can walk. Yeah, I want to lift home. I don't want to fucking walk like absolutely, you double down on that question.
Ask me again, because I'll say yes. Maybe it's just that you want people to persu Do you know what it is as well? We have been groomed and maybe I'm taking this too seriously grooed. No, we have been women. We have been groomed to be too nice. We don't actually say what we want. We just like give a version, which is like the nicest version of something. We don't want to ask for what we really want for fear of someone interpreting that we are, you know, not a
nice person or too pushy or to whatever. We like ask for it, but in this like subliminal way in which we don't actually ask for it at all. We just imply it and hope that the other person picks up in our cues.
You always need to double down with the question, always, because the second and third time, or triple down the second and third time you ask a woman something, you're going to get a different answer, whether it's are you hungry?
Are you sure? But are you doubly sure? Yeah? Okay, get me burger. Do you want to lift? No, I'm good.
He sure, just let me take you think, okay, yeah, you can take me.
Yeah, but this is annoying. Okay, I understand why it's annoying for guys who are like, for sure, okay, I asked you a straight question, you gave me an answer, and now I'm the one in the wrong. But also, girl language is the new girl math. I'm here for this. It is. It is, but we do it to each other as well, like the girls do it to each other. We say something and we mean something completely different, even like, oh my god, I have nothing to wear tonight.
No, in fact, you do.
You have a wardrobe that it will kill you if it falls out onto you and you will drowning your clothes.
That is what you actually mean.
But I can't find the specific thing I want to wear tonight. Or when you go home on a one night stand and you're like, I never do this, narrator, she in fact does this often one hundred percent. I think it's hilarious girl language. Okay, wait, I've got one more, which is like, oh, he's such a creep, which actually, just when you think about it, like oh he's suh a creep. He could be a creep. He could be a creep. Oh he's such a stalker. Nine times out of ten, he's not actually a stalker, nor is he
a creep. He just really likes you and you're not interested in him. He's not attracting, but he's not attractive enough for you to be into him. Whereas if he was more attractive and you were into him, you would not find any of the behavior's stalkerci or creeping. No, because if the stalker.
Is a smoke show that's emotionally and financially stable, that also makes you laugh.
He's not a stalker anymore. You're like, I just found my dream boat. He's incredible, yet I'm getting married. Also, what about when you go on a date and they're like, what are you looking for?
You're like, you know, I'm I'm open to alve a lot of things, you know, but like happy to take it slow.
It's not that.
What you want to say is I want three point three kids and a white picker fence and to get married within twelve months.
But you can't say that. It's a bit over barrier. So a little statistic that you might not know. It turns out that this week, in particular of all the weeks. Actually, specifically, the eleventh of December, which was Monday, is quite a hard day for a lot of couples because it is officially the day of the most breakups in the entire year. I see, well, in a universe, in the whole of the universe, even aliens are breaking up on the eleventh
of December. Everyone's breaking up on the eleventh December. Okay, wait for this. Okay, So there was a report that was done by the New York Post and apparently breakup surge on December eleven. Because of this, like this research that's been done into it, it's been anointed breakup Day around the world.
Isn't that depressing? Is that a day like pancake Day? Like are we supposed to be like have your breakup date? You know how those pancake days.
There's literally a day for fucking everything. Yeah, late day. Yeah, you don't celebrate breakup day. Maybe you do. Sometimes I think about my ex's and I celebrate breakup day. Well, if you're the breaker upera, you'd celebrate more than a break key. Do you know what? Though, I understand this theory.
So this is like, Okay, the eleventh of December I mean, we're well entrenched in the festive season, but if you're in a relationship that you don't want to be in, this is a very stressful time of year for a lot of people. And I'm specifically saying like people who are kind of on the precipice, like do I break up? Do I not break up? Like? What am I gonna do with this relationship? I'm not really in love with them anymore. You know, it's not working out for me.
Whatever that looks like. This week is the d week. This is when it's gonna happen because it's far enough away from Christmas that you don't have to do things together. So, like, the reason why everyone's breaking up now, and this is my theory, is because the looming decisions that need to be made around New Year's, around Christmas Day, around like how you're going to spend your family holidays. No, it's
a financial crisis. You also don't want to buy presents you don't have to buy if this person ain't going to be locked down, you don't want to be spending.
Hard earned cash on it.
Ain't no one going to be buying this person a prid of bucket hat.
No, no, brad Backer hat, maybe some duty free, tax free perfume.
I mean this though, right, like, this is why people are breaking up because it is the perfect amount of time. It's almost a little bit too late, but it's just on the cusp that if it's not done this week,
you've got to wait until after New Years, and that sucks. Well, it's because it's so family oriented as well, and it's like that awkward like if you've actually been with someone, if you've been with someone for a little while, you're expected in the relationship and in the family to bring that person to Christmas.
But if you know that not you're forever You're like, I don't want to integrate you into my family, and then it just gets awkward. It's easy to cut tires. Also, everyone wants to go have their summer flings. That's the other thing.
People want to go on holidays. They want to go Stop calling it hollibay. Sorry, I'm a dog.
People want to go on. People want to go on. No, you're not going back. I don't I have no okay, no, all right, I have one more. I have one more girl. Language. I am such a dog quote unquote is just a really hot cheek who's just done something that's kind of slightly weird. They're like, I'm a dog, I'm so random. That was the other one, I'm so random, I'm so random. Is actually, you're not random at all. You're just a super fucking hot person who said that you're random. So
rod And I'm so glad I got that. I feel bad. Okay, continue back.
To the brain because I know what you want to say, is that I say that I'm a dog.
I'm a dog. I'm a random dog.
I'm sorry if I'm saying hollibay, lolcanoe panel close the lolla door.
I'm a dog.
You can be a good looking dog too, you know, Laura. They Cameron Diaz something about Mary hot smoke showed door.
No she's not that. This is my argument.
This is my argument.
She's I wash your mouth. Keisha said she's a fake dog. No, not that. This is my argument. Cameron Diaz is a fake dog because she's so hot. If you want to be that person, if you see that person, you're like, oh my god, I just wish I looked like her. I wish I could be her. She is aspirationally like cool girl, funny. Jennifer Lawrence another one. They're not a dog. It is yes, they are. It is the definition of courtka. Anyways, let's continue with December eleven.
You can be a hot dog.
Maybe not okay, So we actually asked you guys because I was like, okay, is this accurate or if someone just pulled a day out of their butt. We're like, I wonder how many of our listeners have actually gone through a breakup on December eleven or those couple of days surrounding it.
I had might be break up this week. I might be break up pre Matt. Oh, I was like what. I was like, how are you going to announce? Matt and I broke up because she cheated on him last week with Tim Robuds. Yeah, I cheated on him. Made it into the Daily Mail. He's very disappointed. No, my big relationship pre Matt, we broke up this week.
So we did ask you guys, hey, how many of you are broken up around this time?
And it was surprising, So we want to read a couple of out. Okay. He broke up with me on the eleventh, two days after my dog died. He said he needed to focus on his mental health. But his mental health just happened to be a girl he was at university with that he had been seeing for six months prior. He wasn't focused on his mental health. He's focusing on fucking someone else. Boy language, yeah, boy language, Okay. I literally witnessed a break up this morning on our
morning walk. This is going to sound like a lie, but it isn't. My husband and I were on our morning walk with the dog and we turned the corner to see two people sitting on a driveway looking sad and down at the road. We said good morning as we walked past. Fifteen minutes later we turned around and walked back past them and smart again. About five minutes later, we had crossed the road and he runs past on the other side of the road and yells, have a
great day, guys. I have to run all the way to Fernie Hills, which is a suburb about fourteen kilometers away in Brisbane. She just broke up with me. Life is shit. We were all like, oh what the fuck? This was around seven am this morning and they were both clearly in last night's close early twenties. I'd say this says to proceed it is harder on you early twenties we also didn't think this through. This is gonna be quite a sad, little depressing break, isn't it.
Well maybe not always.
At his work Christmas party, I found out that he cheated with someone at work, so I broke up with him. He turned up at my house two days later asking for his Christmas gift.
What?
What a fucking weirdo?
What a fuck with? Maybe he forgot, maybe he was drunk.
You don't forget that you cheated and got broken up with? No, he just knew she already got in the gift. Wow, it's like Ben coming back being like, look, I know it's over, but that prior to backup, I.
Really like it. Can I have that? Okay? Yes, I just broke up with my partner two days ago. Couldn't bear the thought of spending Christmas and New Years together, introducing him to my family members when I knew it
wasn't going to last. This is what I think is the most common one, right, Like, it is such a big decision to bring someone home, but also it's the break between Christmas and New Year's feels so long, and you have to then think about that person in your New Year's plans, And why do you want to bring in the new year with a person who you know you don't want to be with totally. That's why people are doing it now. It's that new Year's resolution, right,
Like everyone's like, I want to start fresh. This is my year.
I want to have good energy, I want to you know.
Everything is surrounding wanting that fresh start. That's what I think, like for some reason, I mean, January is the same as November, right, It's just a month of the year. Your fresh start can start anywhere, but we always associate it with the start of a new calendar, and that means, you know, you don't want to bring someone into that time if you're not going to go forward with you forever.
You sign up for a new pilates class and you dumb your toxic eggs and that's pretty much how it goes. I welcome January.
We had a friend and I reckon this is really common that the guy literally said, I really like you, but I'm going I think it was Thailand. I'm going to Thailand for the summer holidays. So and she was like so he's like, well, you know, he was like what. She's like, what, So You're going to Thailand? Great, Like you're going to the beach. She's like, yeah, but you know, like so maybe we can regroup in January.
And she was like, what the fuck? He just wanted to go and have a sexy holiday and I think not normal. Sorry comment. I want to say this. I respect that, not the respect it. I respect it because he didn't cheat. I respect that he knew what he was going to do, and he knew he was not going to be faithful. He knew he didn't want to be in a long term relation. He wanted to come back. Okay, I don't respect that, but but I respect the at
least being honest. Look, I'm going overseas. We shouldn't be together. It's going to get freaky because he could have just lied and that would have been way worse. She didn't. It was never going to find out about it. Okay.
Can I tell you what else happened in that situation?
On the edge of my seat now? Okay, because it got really bad.
So she had agreed, she had said exactly what you said.
Okay, I guess, I guess I can see where that's going. You've been honest, you want to go for a couple of weeks, and then you want to come back.
Let's just pretend it didn't happen. Go do your thing, each.
To their own, right.
I was like, okay, interesting, he went, did exactly what he was going to do and got a random European girl pregnant, and now he's a father.
I'm not making this up. He's a father. Did they get back together?
They did for a couple of months and then no. And then he.
Wanted to be in this child's life to this random woman that he didn't know, so she ended up being like too hard basket, so she left and he went and got together. He moved to a European country and got together with this random girl to attempt to raise the child. Could not make that up. Wow, I don't know what happened to this day. That was probably two years ago, and I don't know. Let's get them on the podcast call up. I'll try and get away.
Do you know what, though, that is like a little interesting side pivot here. I think sometimes in relationships we can conflate honesty with someone being a good person, as in like we can go, okay, well, they told me exactly what they're going to do. They were being honest, so therefore that's a reflection of their true self, and so maybe they're even more worth dating, like worth giving another chance to But sometimes honesty is used as a weapon as well. Yeah, but I do sort of.
I am leaning on the side of respecting somebody that is honest, because that's what it is, right. You can't fault someone when somebody comes into a relationship. If you found out they've cheated, right, and you're like, oh my god, you've cheated on me, They're like, no, I didn't, No, I didn't.
Whatever, they're lying, you have this big blow up.
You hate them more.
But when somebody owns something he's like, oh my god, I'm so sorry, Yes I did.
Where do you go.
You're like, oh, well, thanks for telling me, Like you know what I mean, thanks for You.
Can still be upset, But there's a level of when somebody just throws the truth out there that you can't do a lot with it. So when someone comes to you and says, hey, I really love you, but I do want to go and have this fling. I want to go overseas and be with someone, I'm just being honest.
You know.
Of course, there's a part of you that's like they're weaponizing it. One hundred percent, But there is also this other side where you're like, well, what you know?
I have to respect that, Yeah, but it'd also questioned like, well do you love me? And also what is the most important thing to you? Okay, I'm going to read out another tragic breakup for you all to feel really depressed about. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. He broke up with me out of nowhere two days ago, and the reason was we are on very different paths. This came as a complete shock to me, as we have been chatting a lot lately about how we were on exactly the same path, so
news to me. Maybe he realized he was being honest, he realized it wasn't what he wanted anymore. Look, I guess what I wanted to say on this is, if you have been broken up with this week, if you're going through a hard time in your relationship, if this seems like the end of days, you are most certainly not alone. You are actually, if that makes you feel better, you're in the best company you could keep, because there are more people who are breaking up this week than
there ever has been before. But also it can be a blessing. It means that you are also going into New Years with a clean slate, with a new, fresh outlook on life.
There's no COVID, there's no lockdown. You can go get your New Year's kiss, you can go do whatever you want, find some mistletoe.
Yes, and you can tell a man that you never do this, this is totally go home with him and say I can't believe I'm this is the first time.
But there are a lot of people.
But of course it's not easy to be broken up with it anytime, but it does get harder when it's around the Christmas if you're the one that's been broken up with, like when it's around Christmas time, because you do want those special moments with somebody, Like if you have thought you were going into that with someone that might be the love of your life or a relationship, or you thought you were going to have these amazing summer plans with somebody. It is really really hard. But
I don't think it has to be. And when I say that, I know I speak about perception a lot. But you can be going through a heartbreak but still trying to make the most of the situation, and I think I think we're in Australian summer, have your hot girl summer, go out live your life. Don't necessarily get
under someone to get over them if you want too. Great, But I think there are really positive things to take from being single that sometimes it's really hard to see when you're going through the motions of being heartbroken.
Okay, I have a question for you though, around breakups this time of year. Is it selfish? Because I mean this as in, the person who's doing the breakup, are they being selfish? Because I think for them it is still enough time for them to get their shit and their life in order, because they were like, well, I
needed to break up before Christmas. I needed to break up before New Year's But it means that for the person who has just been broken up with, that is not enough time to recover before those big milestones like doing Christmas, like doing news. I actually think that this week all like the next week, and I know that obviously it is such a high statistics in terms of breakups.
I think it is such an incredibly selfish week to break up with someone because I think you've left it as long as you could possibly leave it for it to not affect you. Adversely, but you've not considered how much it affects the other person.
Yes, but if I had two options, if I was getting broken up with and I had the option of them being honest and doing it now on the week of the eleventh of December, or faking it and going through with the whole holiday season, family plans with each other, doing everything knowing that they're going to break up with me in January, I would much rather it now before I do that, before you recommit to families, before you remake these special memories, that's going to be so much harder.
That's a personal opinion for me. If I knew I had two options. Also, you're going to spend a Mozza on presence, maybe family presence.
Food, going away, whatever, I would rather start that new year fresh. I think this is why it's really important to think that if you are in a relationship you or old, like maybe if you're not married, but you're in that preface, just remember to always stick them on the side of the family photos because you need to be able to cut them out if shit goes south. But seriously, there is a photoshop thread in the Facebook group if you guys need anyone photoshopped out.
Throw it in there.
It's so funny.
All right, it's time for an accidentally unfiltered. I was on a snow holiday with my family. At the accommodation where we're in. There was a big buffet breakfast. Now, one morning I was lining up with my family and my cousin was standing in front of me. So I grabbed some cutlery, a big knife. I walked up behind him and jokingly put it into his back and said, don't move.
Gotcha.
The man turned around screaming, and it was not my cousin. Ha. She'd go on with a knife into someone's back as a joke, like just heeld it there and been like, don't move.
And someone just thought they'd been attacked.
Robbed in the buffet line for their sausage, and the sausage over so stupid, you'd die though, you would die, you were done, you know, like, I'm so sorry.
And then he goes to her, sorry, He goes, she said, so sorry, I thought you were my cousin, And he goes, why are you trying to stab your cousin?
Last week, if you listened to the episode, I was talking about how when we were at an event I accidentally rubbed him Robert's back, like you don't miss it an identity, and I had this woman message me and she was like, don't worry. Nothing will compare to the time where I picked up someone else's child in the cinema line and started walking away with them. She's picked up someone else's kid, thinking it was her child, and started walking into the cinema. Her kid was still in
the fucking lollishop. She's walking out with a two year old.
Well, you know, we never finished an episode without our sucond our suite, a highlight and a low light.
I will kick it off. My suck was probably just that.
If anyone was located in Sydney area, I don't know if this went up and down the ghost I didn't look Producer keysh Well, I don't know.
I'm not the weather person, but just.
The heat wave that hit I'm assuming the East Coast this weekend, so it was just shy of forty degrees about thirty eight degrees. I think it hit you in Sydney, probably out west hotter, but it was just so insanely hot. And I'm going to assume most people are like me and don't have air conditioning, so I just sweled it. And then I had Delilah, so I kept putting her under the hose to keep her cool.
It was just a smoke show.
Do you know what we did? If you want to really like, you want to test yourself in forty degree heat. No, we had our kids Christmas at their daycare Christmas party in Centennial Park at midday. Oh my god, I wouldn't have gone too hot. We did. We lasted one hour. I felt like I was swimming inside my own clothes. I've never been so warm when you can actually, you know when you see the heat in the air, like the air is different because it hits the pavement and
comes off. When it's that hot, the air is different. Do you know whose weekend sucked more than ours did, though, Santa? Because Santa was at that daycare Christmas party. The whole man was dying. He literally looked like he was melting from the inside. I was like, you're gonna end up in hospital, Santa, and he was like, I think I am. I think I am the poor guy. Anyway, Well, my
kids had a great time. My sweet was that I just had a really wholesome fitness weekend when I say, fitness weekend is like, I just did a lot.
Of walking with Delilah, swimming in the ocean.
I did ice bars, I did saunas, I did facial because I'm pre peacocking. Peacocking starts next week because I'm going overseas. So this is a pre peacock where you get the skin good, the glow that they're just a feel good on the inside.
And then I'll do all the outside stuff like the brows or the lashes in the tan, but you know it starts from the inside.
The hideous nails. Well, I'll be readoing those tomorrow if I have time. So my song for the week might be an overshare, but you know what, that's what we do here. That's something like you could be a little bit too much for some people, might not be enough for others. Who knows. You know, when you think you're at the end of your period, you know, when you think it's finished, you're like, oh, yeah, I'm done now. Don't need any sort of protection or safety mechanisms in menstruation. Yeah,
what do you mean as in mens streams? I just wanted to confirm it wasn't like a period like at school, like a period dramas. Yeah, like i'd finished my period drama plan at home, been watching Yeah, yeah, like you exactly, the red flowing kind that comes monthly, right, just clarifying. Okay, so you know when you get to the end of it and you think it's finished, you're convinced because you've
just done like a whole night. There's been nothing, you've done half a day, there's nothing, and you're like, cool, we're good, we're scott free. It's time to go. You know, el tamponi less, no tampon no, okay one else. That was me this morning. This morning, I was like, we're good, we're sweet, made it through the night. Yeah, I don't need it, And even if there is, it's just gonna be a little bit less. I'm the thing. Get in
the car, go and pick up produced Keisha. She gets out of the car to go and get a coffee, and I it was like like a sprinkler just started in my pants.
It was a fakey one eighty.
Yeah, it faked me. It just turned around and said, oh, you think I'm done? Yeah, it does. It doesn't on your toes. It's like psych here, I am. Well anyway, it's in my pants and I'll say that's my suck. And I really like these pants and now they're pretty ruined. But anyway, they're blue. But I thought they were tired eyed. But it's a period great tired I pants. It's a really interesting design. How it's just tied eight in the at the crutch.
Yeah, they've really just honed in on that area.
Yeah, it's been like sunset anyway, So that's most suck. My sweet for the week is that my dad is in town. Terry Byrne is cute from Magnetic Island. He's been hanging out with the kids all weekend. He's staying at our house and this is the first time I think in maybe seven years my dad has stayed at my house. He always stays at my sister's house. So I wasn't sure how it was going to go. I was like, Wow, that's a lot of dad exposure time in a very short period of time. But it's been amazing.
We've had the best time. We went to the RSL Club on Friday night. The kids have loved having granddad in town. Very wholesome family time. And he's here for a couple more nights and then he goes back to his Island. I do know that because it is in our joint diary. I Terry Burn is here, and I was like, thanks for daddy's in town. Yeah, but like literally yeah, no, Daddy visited and he metaphorically like sexy,
just like your dad's here. No. But you know what is really weird And this could also be a bit of a suck because I call him Matt Daddy all the time because I'll say he no, stop the constation, ill, No, I call Matt Daddy, as in like for the girls, I'm like, you want to ask daddy, go and tell Daddy, you know, like, hey Daddy. No, I don't say it like that. I could, but I don't. I'll refer to him as daddy all the time. Anyway, we were at the RSL Club having dinner and I said to my
own dad, hey Daddy, and it came out. I just died a little inside.
I'm leating, like, oh, sorry, Daddy, Sorry Daddy.
That was the weirdest thing. And it was weird for him and me. We both got this really uncomfortable uncomfortable for me. Also, I wanted him to pass the gravy and I said, hey, Daddy, that would be definitely a bedroom thing.
Hey, Daddy passed me the gravy.
Is it hot? Pull some gravy?
Yeah, that's hot. All right, On that note, let's get the fuck out.
Gay bye. Anyway, guys, if you've loved the episode, I know it was just just like a silly, little light catch up episode, which I feel at this time of year is exactly what we all need. We have a very big episode for you guys tomorrow. It is our second part two on narcissism, covering narcissistic personality and how to deal with a parent who is a narcissist and that dynamic whether it's co parenting or your own parent as well. It's such an interesting app.
And you know the dream, So your mum te dunte, don tae your friends and share the love because
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