BONUS EPISODE - Uncut with KIIS FM Part 1

Hey guys, and welcome to our cheeky little bonus episode of Life Uncut. It is very very strange being here and doing even just this intro recording without Britt. But this little bonus episode is because, as some of you guys would already know, Britt and I did a segment on Kiss FM the last couple of weeks and there's been so many of you on the Facebook group and also in DMS asking if there's somewhere where you can

Mitch Till Midnight, Kiss Nights.

Welcome back, Kiss Nights. I'm Mitch Till Midnight. I'm joined by.

The lovely Britt Hockeley Laura Burn.

Hello, ladies, Hi Mitch, thanks for having our Thank you.

I feel great coming in a hot seat.

I know it's fun. I have you guys here.

BRIT's just over there, like nestled into Jackie O's against her sparkly microphone, really making.

It her own.

Guys.

I know I was going to play it down a little bit just in case Jackie was listening.

But Jackie, I'm I'm actually all in. I'm frothing your microphone. It's beautiful. You've kept it clean.

She's going to come in tomorrow. But why's the foundation on make phones? I don't know whether this color. I'm not a mable leaning girl.

What I've pretty been making out with the headphone because there's lepsi all over Mitch, what.

Do you do at the studio at night? You are playing any makeup or what's happening?

Having the time my life?

That's it? Literally, guys.

You may know Britain Laura from The Bachelor, right or very successful run.

I mean you found the love of your life.

You with Maddie j pro created, Yeah, you've got another one on the way yeah, pregnant yeah, and then Britt you made it all the way to the end, Final Girl and single Dune the national team jumped on national television.

It's not a contrast. Hey here we are, here, we are. But you know what, Mitch is always too soon.

So you are used to have a podcast Life on Cut, which I love and Pete people seem to love it too. So we're going to be doing some of the things you do on the pod. We're going to be asking some questions ask on.

Card is that how it works?

We have asked gunkat, which is a section on the podcast where we answer listener questions. So guys, you can call up with your deep, dark and dirty questions and we will give our very unqualified but extremely enthusiastic advice.

You know what, If anything, it just makes you feel a little bit less alone and a little bit less weird because you're, like, man, everyone else has these awkward problems as well.

I'm not sure only one yea. And if we can't relate, we'll just lie.

If you feel like we've one of the two, like, it's fine, it'll be one of those three options.

Well, that is what's next.

Because I listened to the podcast in research like I'm a journal over here, Like I listened to Life on Cards.

How You Take your Job to Sea?

It really did. It's a hard hitting on Like Peter.

Roverton over here, you love that for human I listened and I heard something a couple of weeks ago. Laura involves you in a toilet and dropping a very expensive piece of tech into said toilet pole.

He sounds so shocked by this.

That's hardly the most shocking thing I said on that podcast.

After that really confused me, and the fact that I took a selfie with the fun tonight and all sorts of the phone.

Okay, so guys, for anyone who hasn't listened to the podcast, I went to the toilet, you know, I had my two minutes piece away from my child, sat down, did my business, then realize the toilet paper wasn't actually within reach. It was on the other side of the bathroom, which also happens when you have a kid. Things just get

Pocket and into my poop. Oh yeah, you know what.

Matic I already quizzed her on this. It wasn't a hard poop, really, no, it was like a vindo. It was like pot.

Pooh, my god.

Yeah, why let's leave it on vinderloom.

We're gonna take your calls because I want to.

Know what, what have you dropped in the toilet?

Because I don't want you to be alone. I want you to feel like there are other people in the world the life.

I know there are other people out there who've experienced this. You just wipe it off and you get on with your life.

Off you.

No, No, there are other people that experience this, but there's no one that just throws their hand in, pulls it out and gets.

On with the day.

It was my own toilet.

We weren't like at the offer or at like a festival, in like a portaloot.

True, was it was it your poo?

Yes? I wasn't. I wasn't spooming on top of somebody else's poof. They only flash once a day. They're saving water.

Environmentally conscious guys. It's twenty twenty. Has everybody watched that David Attenborough documentary?

I highly recommend.

I'm gonna take calls now. Thirteen one o sixty five gives a call. What have you dropped in the toilet? What have you dropped on a poo? Who cares? Callers?

We'll see You're not alone here at kiss Nights, I got Britt and Laura in here from Batchie from Girls from lifelun Cut podcast.

What did you just say, Britt? With the micsare on?

I didn't know the mics run. We were just having a general conversation. But I was like, I had a tampon story. I thought it was funny. I just wanted to do an audi.

And she just said, can we talk about tampons? Well you just did.

Now we are too late, is that well the answer is yes, we're here.

We're taking a call thirteen one and six five because in preparation for having the girls on, I listened to the podcast and I heard a story.

Laura, you dropped your phone in your toilet.

I did.

I dropped my phone in the toilet. I feel like this is a common thing. Maybe not just a phone. Maybe you've dropped other things in there.

Who knows.

Yeah, but we put it out there for some moral support. And at the start the phones weren't really firing, but we got there in the air we did, they went firing.

I think there was some embarrassment, to be real. Let's go to Carl in Merrickfield. Hey Carl, what did you drop in the toilet?

Well, I've dropped a couple of chicken wings down the toilet. For some reason, eating chicken wings on the toilet. I feel like it's the number one rule. You don't eat on the toilet.

No, no, no, I was peeing.

I was just having it. I was a bit drunk, and then you know, you get halfway through a wing and it goes there.

Oh, look understandable. What did you do?

Did you dive in there after it and save the chicken wing, have a chower down?

Or did you just did you just let it go?

Yeah?

I think I just let it go?

Now, what do you mean you think you just let it go? Let it go? Card?

That would also be so awkward for the partner walking in the toilet and being like, Babe, I think we need to get you some gavage gone.

It's a little bit.

Soggy, but it's still good three second rule guys like Babe, your digestion's not worth Can you shut a hole?

Thank you? Thank you, Carl. Let's go to Brie and franch. As far as Brie, what have you dropped in the toilet?

It wasn't me, It was my sister. So she was wearing one of those twenty with the big pocket at the front. She had her work phone and her personal phone in her clocket, and as she stood up and one of these dropped in, she's sort of panic, went to reach it for it, and the other one pointing after it.

Oh, Bree, I knew that there was someone out there. Look, you just gave me a two for one deal.

I only did one.

In my own proof, but it gets better than true.

Your sister is a true legend. What did she do? Did she dive in there after it? Did she salvage it?

Did she just use a little spray and white?

She chucked it both?

Yes?

I mean that's the wise decision, Paul, Laura. I shouldn't even sanitize it.

She just pulled it out.

Okay, guys, the new phones are also waterproof, so like I wasn't going to just toss it. The phone works fine, Mitch, you've used it, you've touched it.

It's just before, before we jumped into this, and I was a puerile ascetitize my hands.

Remember, Laura, yours wasn't pure water, yours post winderoo.

That's not just why I used my wipe.

We've got Sarah, Sarah, Hi, Sarah, what have you dropped in the toilet?

Hi?

I have dropped my work keys in the toilet before. I used to run. Yeah, I ran a really gavy restaurant and I was doing the nervous pooh we had we had this really big event on and I always used to get really nervous in case something went wrong. And I went to the bathroom and I used to have hang my work keys on my work skirt, and they.

So lost into the toilet.

Do you know what, Laura, I'm going to put this out there.

Sorry, Laura, I love you, but Laura does a nervous pooh before every podcast that we do.

Okay, how solid are we talking here?

Though?

On a scale of one to five Bristol, Yeah, more than solid.

Yeah. Do you know what?

It never is? At least it's.

Easy to clean to the honors.

I put my hands in with the toilet paper in my hand.

Oh, Sarah, you know what, we really let you have it easy out there.

We could have finished in Sarah, but you just take it down there, right into the toilet humor.

Oh my god, we definitely could. We have a last call on Maddie's call quickly, Maddie, the last one. What do you drop in the toilet?

Yeah, I'm Maddie. Me give a really nervous.

Guy that I don't often tell him story, But I just want to say a big fan of the show, first time caller, I.

Recognize, I know who this is.

Am.

I getting troubled by my own fiance. Is that?

What's happening on live on radio. It appears that Laura, Hi, you're struggling.

You about to have the baby for a.

Couple of hours by yourself. This jealousy needs to end. She's only been with me for like twenty five minutes.

For calling buddy.

All right, we're taking your questions up next here at Kids Nights, Reach till midnight.

My god, Maddie j on the air, how exciting.

Or a tree?

I feel so bad.

Tate McCray, you wrote me first here at Kiss Nights, I meet till midnight, ninem fifty four, almost out clock. You can give us a call thirteen one or six 's five. You can ask uncut real soon. Because Britt and Laura joined me.

High ladies, Hi, man him, I need.

To like address something because Britt you were telling us off the year you had a date the other night, and Laura has you've got a bone to pick read the dates.

So Britt has a tendency to be extremely attracted to men who are covered in red flags, and that's just her thing.

She's like, ooh, are you toxic?

Great, let's day let me invest some solid time into you. So anyway, so Britt came off this date recently, and like, I mean, all all things seem pretty well with this guy so far.

But she came off this date and she said, do you know what, he just doesn't know how hot.

He is, which is something that she says after every day, like the guy's an actor or a model or something. Anyway, he rocks up to the date wearing a white turtleneck, and I'm like, any man, any man who has the confidence to wear a white turtleneck on a date, he knows exactly how hot he his girlfriend.

Look, let me just set the scene here. First of all, there's a few things I'm attracted to. Yes, a turtleneck, Oh my god.

A turtle neck.

I don't know what is A man in a turtle neck gets me going. A white turtle neck, I'm yours.

You're like, what's under that neck?

Roll number two is like a solid amount of red flags. If you've got turtlenecks in a red flag, I'm yours.

I get like librarian vibes from a turtle neck, get like a want to rip your clothes off?

And okay, but no, the awkward.

Thing about this date is and he's beautiful, he's French. He doesn't know I's on a bachelor. He knows nothing about me, he doesn't know about the podcast, has.

Not listened or anything.

So long story short, this is the podcast is my undoing in the dating world because is it just the podcast?

And you know what, ladies and gentlemen, that is my best friend right there.

Okay, maybe it's a bit a bit of the podcast, bit of my personality.

Who knows no.

So I go on this date, right and I always tell her everything about it, and I always tell the podcast about it because.

Laura pulls the information from me. So I'm on the podcast.

I never give details, but I was like, look, went on a date with a French guy.

He was beautiful, he wore a white turtle neck. That's the end of it.

The next day, on my Instagram, I post a photo with me and my best friend, who is a male, and.

Now I never post men.

Everyone wants me to be in love, and my Instagram starts going off, like the comments, hundreds of comments of people saying started to say, oh my god, is this the French guy? Is this the white turtleneck guy? And the white turtleneck French guy who knows nothing about me follows me on Instagram so all of a sudden, this poor guy knows that, Like he's like, what the hell?

This girl has obviously gone and spoken to the world about date with a white But I also like that he's just known as white turtleneck French guy.

Like that's him.

He's just this ambivalent, ambiguous man.

But this is the thing. I'm never gonna name names.

But just like in case anyone was actually wondering and wants success for my dating.

Life, and date went well, thank you.

We're very happy for you.

You just spoke about this on national radio.

Yeah, you just went from little podcast like our little concealed community to the whole of Australia.

You're welcome. Disclaimer was not my idea. This is live radio. You guys have thrown me under the bars.

I feel like I am being targeted.

This is gonna be great for your dating life.

Yeah, there's rule as long as you care. Love that kiss nights. I'm mitched till midnight.

Happy Wednesday. We're here, We're live. I got Laura and brit girls.

Hi Mitch, Mitch, happy to be here. Let's not talk any more about my dating life.

I know we done. We've moved on to the listeners.

We want to hear about other people's tragic stories to make ourselves feel better about like what we go through.

Right?

Is that how this works?

Ask on Kit. That is absolutely how this works.

We have a segment on a podcast which is called Ask Uncut where all of the listeners well not all of them, but a lot of them right in with their deep, dark and dirty questions.

We literally get hundreds a week.

And the way this started was the fact that, like, some really awkward things were happening to myself and Laura, and we wanted to make ourselves feel better.

So we asked for their trug.

So we just lean on everyone else's trauma and give unsolicited, unqualified, but enthusiastic advice.

So who gave you, guys the therapy ticket? Like I would not come to.

You if you knew my life and what I have been through.

I feel like I am actually qualified.

It's years and years and years of terrible, terrible decision making that really sets you up to give better advice the next time around.

Are you the people that your friends come to when they need advice?

This is how this started.

I had so many people after I got dumped nationally.

Did you sorry?

Dis confirmationally? Do you know that, Laura?

Did you do someone break up with your national TV?

Are you okay?

If you don't laugh, you cry? You talked about it a few times. Are you still struggling? And it's literally how this started.

Once once you get dumbed to national television, everyone started to come to me like that. All of a sudden, I had all the answers, which I actually thought was hilarious. I was like, you guys, think now I'm a professional at this, And that's why I went to Laura and I said, I think we could do something with this because I can't answer these people on my own.

Well what's what are some examples? Quickly?

So if you guys listening and thinking I could go for some late night advice. It's ten o'clock, guys.

What's some advice? What some questions you get thrown to on the pod?

Well, we have a legitimate question that we can answer right now. You want to do a right So we received this one today, which I think is very topical.

Hi, ladies and Mitch. I met a guy online dating. We were really vibing and we had a one night stand.

But the next day we woke up and we started very casually talking about politics. Turns out he's a Trump supporter. He even has a make America Great Again hat.

Oh dear, Okay, So I hope you woke up and put him in the bin and left. Immediately, unsubscribe and get out quick.

And the hell out of that.

You can't wear that at again because you've got an important from the States.

It's a whole thing.

It's a one night stand.

You're not invested yet, like I think, do not spend your time here, do not pass go, do not receive two hundred dollars and leave.

Look, my main alarm here, my alarm bell is.

That you woke up after a hot one night stand and you started talking about politics.

Yeah, that's a real note.

That is a red flag for me.

I would be hot out the door before he even said he.

Was a Trump supporter.

There you go. I like that advice.

If you have a question for the girls thirteen one oh six five, give us a call.

We're asking you. K'll be right bad across the country. Welcome the kids.

Nights.

I mixed till midnight here and live.

We got Semi Jade on with me a little bit before eleven o'clock not to make my two kids that I've got with me right now feel any less important.

Wow, Mitch, our way out?

We know who were used by?

Can you?

I don't want to leave the study? Just buzz semming in when you go down, just let her in.

Yeah it's cold outside, thank you?

Yeah, give your jacket?

We thought obviously the girls Britain Laura from Batchie from Life on Cut podcast. They do a segment on the pod ask Uncut basically unsolicited advice.

Let's be real, Well, it's solicited advice. It's just unqualified.

It's just not good.

I still fight that because I am.

I think I'm really qualified with the awkwardness that life presents me.

Yes, I thought, before we get you out of here, we'll take one more. So we've got on thirteen one six five tenure in Chatswood. Hi you're on with the girls which question?

Hi, ladies, So I haven't even embarrassing problem. I don't know how to put it nicely, but basically every time I have sex, I fart and it's basically ruining my sex life.

Oh, then you have a question for you. Do you have a dog?

No, you should buy a dog and then have the dog in the bedroom, and then every time you have sex you can blame it.

On the dog.

So hang on, it's probably not It's probably sound, is it? And I this might be intrusive, but there are two types of passing wind during sex, which one is yours.

Seem to hold it. It's not loud because I am trying, but it's like a.

And yeah, what are you eating before?

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Maybe we need to start milk meal prepping.

Oh no, in all honesty, I'm just going to be really serious here for a hot second.

This is actually really normal. We have so many people riding into it. We have a lot of people writing into us saying that it happens. It happens to men as.

Well, and I think literally, finally, just laugh it off and be like whoop, see you like, just own it because you can't hide it.

And sex is It's true.

It's gritty, it's dirty, it can be a bit nasty. Like you just have to laugh these things off in the bedroom and get on with it.

I agreed.

And if your part is focusing on the part rather than what's actually happening, you might even need to work on your technique.

If you're naked in front of him, and he's more worried about you passing me.

At what point during this sex, like, hey baby, you're ready to like in the action.

Or is it like when you're all getting hot and heavy At the very end coming home, she's like, I I want to tell you what time.

She's like a restaurant.

People have the same problem, and the thing.

Is just take notice of it.

It's probably positional, so maybe just take a mental note, write in a diary.

Who knows, go all out, but just make a note if it's in a certain position, don't go there again, especially that night out in your diary.

Seven pm Tuesday, Doggie style doesn't work for me.

Let's try another.

One Monday with Pop Tuesday, ten pm.

Missionary exceptionally Gussie.

They turn out love you.

We have got help.