BACH UNCUT - clowns, chlamydia and car rides

Hi guys, and we'll welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I am Laura and I am joined today with none other than Maddie j Wow.

What a what a privilege for you, Laura Burn.

Yeah, I'm sitting here in our bedroom. Both of us have a sock over each microphone, sock over something else, and we're going to do the bad cut.

Goodness. Oh yeah, Laura, Can I just say always going into these you like, sit me down and you're like, hey, like, just just be aware. I don't want to talk about anything that's too grotesque. I want to be quite sensible. No fart jokes. You lay down the law and then you just go off on your own tangent doing your own thing.

That's holding this against me because we've actually done his intro three times and every time he started making fart jokes within the first thirty seconds, and I was like, can we just get through an intro of Life on Cut without talking about bodily functions or farting or sticking fingers into balms or anything to do with that stuff.

No, Laura, Absolutely, we cannot.

Apparently not.

It's all we have, it is, this is what our relationship is based.

On thingers in the bump.

If we didn't talk about it, we would just be lying to ourselves.

Okay, and to the three hundred thousand people who listen, it's great.

This is what they want, Laura.

Okay, well, it's definitely what you're getting. Just get a little update on us. We're still in lockdown and we've been spending way too much time together and for that, we're really sorry to every single person who's going to listen to this episode because there may be some squabbling. Emotions are running high.

In this house. Amount of fighting that has to get edited out of these records. It's a miracle that we can get it done. But hey, before we go into recapping the Bachelor episode five and six, I do have a question for you, Laura. You know I like to ask a question before we get into the juicy bits.

Does it have anything to do with bodily functions?

Well, potentially if you want to go that way, but I won't lead into it just yet. My question is I find that you're quite inconsistently here we go when it comes to what you wear to bed. For example, last night you came to bed and I was nude, and you're naked.

That was not a sign.

And I was thinking to myself, well, Laura, loud and clear, you do not need to see anything else. I get what's going on here.

That's a lie. Actually what happened.

And I was confused because it was after ten thirty, and I was like, it was a week day. What is happening here?

We don't fuck on weeknights, ladies and gentlemen. No, So I came to bed and I was nude. This is actually what happened. It was late. I came to bed nude after having a shower, so all of that wig got out.

And you know that when you have a shower. It's my favorite because you have a shower at nighttime. So if you ever want to seduce me, all it takes is a bit of body wash, a bit of warm water, and I'm there.

So I got into bed after having a shower. It was past ten thirty. It was a week night, and I'd already said I was tired and had a headache a few times before getting into bed. So that was really.

Confused, very big headache.

A lot of mixed messages were going on anyway, So I get in bed and Matt rolls over and he goes, Babe, you're naked, and I was like yes, and he goes, but you have your period. And I was like, thank you so much for reminding me. Matthew Johnson, like I had just forgotten it.

Well, they were new sheets, they were clean sheets, so I was thinking, what is she doing here?

Matt doesn't know how a tampon works, so I explained that to him at ten thirty night, rolled over and when to sleep.

Still don't know the difference between a pad and a tampon. It's lost on me.

Like, so you rolled it up and stuffed it inside.

I was like, as long as you don't destroy the sheets, that's fine.

So yeah, okay, we didn't talk about fast, but we talked about the fact that I have my period and we didn't have sex last night. So let's recap episodes.

And at what point did you decide that I'm going to sleep naked?

After I got out of the shower and I was too lazy to put clothes back on, I was already nude, so I just thought the fastest route to bed is straight into bed. No clothes, do not pass go get into the sheets.

You like to live dangerously. Laura Burn.

Okay, So I don't know who of you are still with us and watching The Bachelor at the moment. The ratings would suggest otherwise.

Well, it's hard because the Olympics. It's just so bloody good. I was slow with my watching of the Olympics, but now I'm engrossed. I'll watch it and I'll be in tears. If Australia even gets close to winning a medal. I'm literally in a blubbering mess.

Well, when we start recapping the Athletics, we know how to call on. But right now we've got to recap The Bachelor, and to be honest, I have had to pull Matt away from the Olympics unfortunately to watch Batch. I'm still investor, guys, I am there. I am here for it. But if you started watching episode five and then you switched off after the single date, you may have thought that the episode in its entirety was going

Slow, painfully slow. Don't you think Yeah, it.

Was not It was not good. Can tell me, Matt unpack what happened? Single date? Who got it? Where are we at?

Okay, So we start off this episode with a single date.

Something new and different for an episode of Bachelor.

Well, hey, sometimes it's a group date first, sometimes it's a single date. The clue for this single date, Laura, is that it will be aviation based, which doesn't come as a huge surprise considering we are bombarded with the fact that Jimmy is a pilot every second of every episode.

You would think the way that they've set up Jimmy being the pilot, that that's his only redeeming quality. Like, there's nothing else about Jimmy that they're using as a selling point. Just he's a pilot, which means he's going to only be there and be supporting you in your relationship for fifty percent of the time.

But again, shout out to all the pilots who listened to this podcast.

There's no fifty year old men who listened to this podcast, I doubt.

Anyway, as we're waiting to find out who gets a single date, we have a little line here from Steph which I find weird because let's just remember on night one when they all arrived at the cocktail party, when she found out that Jimmy was a captain, she got very pissed off because she had once dated a captain. She got cheated on, and she pretty much said, I hate all pilots.

It's no secrets of those who know me that I do love pilots. The one thing that I like about Steph is that she's consistent with her amnesia. Like she's very good at forgetting the things that she said in the episode before, and it makes for fucking great TV.

Do you think she's actually forgetting what she said or she's just getting caught up in the moment or.

Option number three? Is it a little bit of an editing technique here? You know, like maybe she's said a bit more context around when she said, oh, I love Clearly she loves pilots, She's dated them in the past, So I think that maybe we're seeing fractions and segments of what she's saying and it's being used to paint a pitch of her, and that picture is that she's very.

Inconsistent, very inconsistent.

I also think on this episode and this there's going to be a few call outs that we have, which we're going to get into a little bit further down the track. But I think whoever was editing this episode was drunk like because there are a lot of inconsistencies in this EPP and I am going to remind me of the Max. I'm going to call them out as we kind of get along the story because.

I didn't really see them. You were the one who pointed them out, your very egg eyed.

So I mean, obviously that first little inconsistency, that's not an editing one necessarily. But Steph saying that she loves aviation and loves pilots, now like it could be a slive hands with how they've set her up to look like an idiot. But there are quite a few things that happen in this episode which are one hundred percent editing, and I think once you start to see those things, you go ah okay and being painted a picture that

Oh horror. The poor editor at Channel TiO right now is probably sweating thinking, oh my gosh, I'm going to be under investigation here. I'm being called out by life uncut.

What did you think of this single date?

Ah?

Okay, look I'm trying to be positive here, trying to be positive, but I didn't think a lot of the date, to be honest, and partly because when I watch The Bachelor and I see the single dates, I want that element of just bouginess, you know. I want to have the yachts. I want to have the fast cars. I don't want to watch somebody in a simulator for forty minutes.

It's like when you're a kid and somebody else is playing the video game and you have to sit next to them watching them play the video game. Like, no one wants to do that, I mean unless you're really really into video games. But having the whole of Australia video.

So actually this was perfect.

For her, But watching the whole rest of Australia sitting there watching them play a video game really didn't tickle my fancy.

Okay, So for anyone who wonders how the dates actually get produced, obviously the Bachelor doesn't sit there make phone calls and tries to book in the simulator or book in the helicopters. But you do have a producer and you sit down with them well in advance, and you talk about, hey, what things would you want to do, like if you know, blue Sky, thinking what would be an ideal date for you and Laura, and you put forward options. They make phone calls, they see what's possible.

I think one of the big things that I didn't realize when I was on the show, and something that Matt's explained to me since, is that obviously, like like you said, you know, you kind of know what you're going to do on some of the different dates. And the really exciting dates are the dates that are with the helicopter, or are with a beautiful big boat or somewhere you're going somewhere lavish and lash and it's just

And don't you want the dates to be something that you, as an everyday person couldn't do. You know, you want to be in a ferrari. You want to be going somewhere that you, as a normal punter, couldn't have access to that. And it's like I could go down and pay seventeen fifty and jump in that simulated tomorrow if.

I wanted to, And I mean, like, look bless and they tried to make it exciting. There was a fire and then Jimmy did, in pure Jimmy style, get a little bit handsy and a little bit suggestive. I want to get you going down?

Is that so?

As I said that I read, we haven't even a dinner Jimmy. Overall, it was a bit of a boring date. Although Laura there was a part afterwards where she got changed into a red dress. They sat down on a rooftop somewhere they did have quite a good kiss.

This is the first editing thing that I want to call out here. And look, I don't know anything more than anyone else.

I couldn't see it. I see it.

You are blind. You were denying what it is happening right in front of your eyes.

I thought he had a cole saw or something.

Okay, So if you guys want to go back and watch have a look, you can tell me whether I'm right or wrong. But I think that Jimmy and Steph had been macking on long before he gave her the rose. So there's lots of close ups of him talking and then being really intimate and chatting about what they want

Everyone's like, ah, yes all the time, that one time. That happened to me every weekend.

So I think that they had kissed long before the kiss that we saw on the TV. That's what I'm.

Thinking, Detective Laura added again, although you did say something that I thought was bang on when she got changed into a red dress that was gifted to her by Jimmy. You said, oh, they're going to make her come back into the mansion with that dress boxed up and try and make the other girls jealous, which is exactly what happened, because she came into the kitchen and then poor Sierra was standing there with some of the other girls, and it was just you could cut the tension with a knife.

I think as well though that there was a bit of editing that went on there. So there was this one scene. So Steph is standing there in the kitchen. She's there with the three girls and it was Sierra and two others whose names I can't remember, but they were having a chance. She was unmaking the desk.

Poor girls.

Well we're at the point where like we should pretty much know everyone's names, but unfortunately we're just not there yet.

Not the case.

Yeah, So Steph is standing there and she's having this conversation around what her date was. Like, Steph is really bragging and she's coming across as too big for her shoes after this date. So how do you feel about.

Your connection with Jimmy now better than yours?

Okay, So this little grab was something that really stood out to me when it happened, and the camera was really shaky if you're paying close attention, the camera was shaky. It was a really really mean thing that Steph said. And Sierra's meant to be one of her closest friends in the house.

But I feel like those two they would have so much banter where I feel like they're constantly paying each other out, Like I don't think there was any venom in that statement.

I agree, and I think it came across as super mean. And the way that the show was put together is that as the audience, they wanted us to think that that was a really mean exchange. But I don't know if I believe it, or maybe there was a little bit of frank combiding that went on there as well. And Frank and Marting for anyone who doesn't know, is where they kind of can take audio and stitch it together for it to mean something else or say something else.

Laura, I agree with you for once.

Well that's really nice to hear, because something that the listener doesn't know is that we've already had two fights that we vetted out this season.

A bit of franking Biden going on over here.

I love you, honey, I love you.

Okay, group date. So did you know that Jimmy used to be a lifeguard?

No? I thought that Jimmy was only a pilot. But he's a man of many talents.

It would seem, well, they've kept it under wraps, haven't they, the lifeguard part.

I think that they were like, we've really exhausted the pilot thing. What else can Jimmy do? Chat there is he's a lifeguard.

He's never been a lifeguard in his life. That is like, we need something else. We're flogging this dead horse way too much.

And they just plucked his friend off Bondo beach, and they were like, come on down.

You do Steven, come over here, jump in the boat.

Do you remember what his friend's name was, Cliff?

I think it was so Cliff.

Which it wasn't, but we'll call him that. He brought Cliff. You know, you always need to have your friends and your family dictate who you date.

So he looked very nervous, didn't he Cliff?

He brought his friend, who was a lifeguard along to help him make the decision and figure out which girl he should spend some extra time with and which girl he would be most suited to. I like that he's brought his friend try and figure out who he's most compatible with. But we all know, I mean, I would love to find out this guy's name and find his Instagram profile.

Told you it's Cliff.

You know that he is one hundred percent going to hook up with at least one of Jimmy's sloppy seconds.

Well, I thought Tatum kind of had a nigh on him because there's a few girls in the mix at this point haven't had a lot of time with Jimmy, so as soon it's a bit of fresh meat, it's thrown into the mix. Your eyes are just absolutely fixated on that person.

I can guarantee that him and Tatum are hooked up. Now I can't guarantee it, but I'm going to put my money on that sports bet. There's my hot tip, all right.

So the objective with this date is that the girl's been split into two teams. They've got to paddle out into the ocean, which Laura, it's like one foot high surf.

At the moment, the surf was very small. It was look, it would have been cold. You know, they're probably getting into winter because it wasn't the nicest day.

I reckon. They filmed this months ago, so actually would have been quite nice, I think temperature wise.

I remember when we filmed our season, which so would have been filmed at the same time, and it was freaking freezing.

Babe.

Last group date they rocked up in Anna.

Rax sorry yes, yes, jacket. And now this week they're like, all right, girls, getting your bikinis and get out there.

So this week, like Matt said, they had to go out and they were on life saving boards. They had to swim ount around the life boys and poor Tatum. Tatum at the start, she was the one that didn't really want to do it because she had been in a situation where she'd been saved before. And she's not a strong swimmer, but man, she gave it her all. And to be honest, all of the girls gave it. They're all except for maybe Holly.

Well, no, Holly tried hard. She tried, and I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt here because I watched the footage back and it didn't really look like she got dumped by a wave because there weren't any waves to get dumped by. It even looked like she barely got a hair wet. But as she came back into shore from her leg of the relay, she comes back onto the beach, she then tags a teammate. She then drops to her hands and knees, and then she's like, help. I think I took out a lot of water.

I think at the start it was the opposite. I think she came in and she was like laughing and looked really happy, and then she progressively got worse and worse and worse. But it did like I mean, at the start, it was like I've taken on water. Then it turned into I've almost drowned.

Did you? It was one foot of swell.

So then okay, the poor thing that had to put the whole activity on hold. Holly's in the sick bay. She's like covered in a tinfoil jack. No, she's not really, she's just got like a blanket over us.

She's with medic.

She's with the medic like it's serious, guys. They have stopped filming, they have gone. She's taken a full time out.

And she's there laying on the bed like her hand on her head, being like, I don't know if I can.

Continue, and Jimmy comes in to make sure that she's okay. So obviously Jimmy's then left the group date, he's left the whole activity and he's spending some one on one time with Holly, and she genuinely is a bit of embarrassed. But it really escalates from you, guys.

Didn't Jimmy say I think you should go to hospital? Was that from Jimmy or was that from a Holly? I think it was Jimmy. And then you know, when you can do a situation where you should say it's fine, like enough's enough, I'll be good, but she just kind of goes, yeah, I think you're right. Next thing. Holly's being put into a car and she's being sent to hospital.

She's still wearing a bikini.

I think even Holly is thinking, oh fuck, should I say something? Maybe I just roll with it.

She's like, this really really escalated, didn't it? Like being put into a taxi to be taken to hospital? And she's like, but like, the thing that I don't understand is okay, she almost drowned. She walked to the sick bait, she walked to the car. She's fine. I don't think she needs to have a lung check, but you know what, there she is in hospital.

But also, let's not forget this is a pandemic right now. You know, we can't have people rocking up to hospitals in bikinis being like, oh I just got my hair wet and I wanted to make sure I was okay. Oh could you?

I also think, like the production teams, they stopped it after Holly ended up in hospital for taking on too much salt water. I'm glad she's okay. She was there at the cocktail partty, so she was fine.

Was she okay?

Well, the cocktail party would have been the next day. In regards to like filming schedule. It would have been the next day. She was there. She was fine, she was dressed as a turtle, very embarrassed. But I reckon. Production probably got two point where they're like, okay, Holly's going to hospital. This is a terrible use about resources, Like you cannot be having bachelor girls rocking up at a hospital during a pandemic because they've taken on too

Now? What happened there?

Know why? Produces Channel ten, Warner Brothers, what happened?

What have we missed?

Once upon a time I got some sneaky extra time with you, Matthew Johnson, and they didn't show any of it because we spent the whole time making.

Out which was that the paddle steamer which you.

Took me to the seek. I'm glad you remember it. You took me to the secret Garden.

Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, I remember that.

I was really really drunk, and I don't think I said anything coherent. I didn't say anything that could have actually been used to give context to why we liked each other. I was just really drunk. I said a whole lot of drunk, wasted all stuff, and then we made out for about twenty minutes.

Now, that poor editor would have watched that back and been like, oh, what the hell do I do here? Cut That's going to end up on the floor.

He was like, why did he choose her? This is a mess. Anyway, nothing's gotten better than that.

Okay. So I do think it's fair that the girls on that group date were a little bit salty for want of a better word, that Holly taken up so much time with her little incident.

Good pun. Also, I do think that the girls are a little bit like this escalated and seems like a massive overreaction.

It's like someone getting a splinter and then being like, take.

Me to hospital. And I'm sure maybe there was more to it, Like I would have thought that if she had really been dumped, we would have seen that on the TV, because it would have been a better explanation as to why she ended up in hospital. But the fact that we just saw her splashing around and then laughing and then it kind of escalated. I don't know. It was weird for me, and I think it was weird for Tatum too.

Yeah, and I think it was weird for Tatum too.

I also think she took advantage of the situation trying to get, you know, that extra little bit of extra time with Jimmy, which brings us to the cocktail party. And I have to say, this is probably my favorite cocktail party to date. And that's because I know that Sierra is a little bit of a villain, but I just love her. I know that Sierra is a little bit of a villain, but I love her so much and I have so much time for her, and I

I really hope that one of them gets a single date. I know that they're not going to get one. I know there's absolutely no hope even I just hope one of them gets an extension on a group date.

So what happened on this cocktail party is it wasn't a usual cocktail party. Obviously, Styling had run out of dresses, so instead they made the girls dress up. It was kind of like a weird extended group date, like normally this is a group date activity, but they made the girls dress up in their spirit animal, and all the girls chose different animals. Laura chose a sloth, Holly chose a turtle, and Tatum's dressed as a bin chicken but

So I was going to say that my spirit animal was a choir tonight because I like sleeping and I've definitely had chlamydia, but I thought that would be quite hard to explain to Jimmy, so I stuck with the phoenix because I've risen from the ashes.

I do love that just because people are wearing costumes, it means that they actually act like they're three year olds, and the whole cocktail party just turns to shit.

The girls have just gone wild. Laura's just climbed tree.

Climbing the tree.

Oh, come on, I'm not that high. The cocktail party has completely derailed. It's like a fucking circus. All the girls are dressed like they're in a zoo, and they're behaving like they're in a zoo. But during this whole situation, and while this is going on, Ash uses this time to take Jimmy to the jacuzzi, and they spend a lot of one on one time together, and the girls seem to have been getting quite frustrated by the fact that they were spending so much extra time together.

And like the rest of this episode, we think things have been pretty choppy. And I did notice the editing at the Rose ceremony because you have all these close ups of the girl's faces, you know, like sometimes they look quite nervous, you know, very tense. And there were multiple girls that I thought it was quite obvious they'd been crying, so Ash, for example, had quite puffy eyes.

Yeah, I think they did try and allude to the fact that maybe the girls weren't that happy that Ash had spent so much time with Jimmy and the jacuzzi, but obviously something bigger had gone on, like there's something that's happened there. There's been a fight, there's been an argument or something that we're not seeing because it was really choppy. The girls looked super upset, and you know, by the end of the night, you're usually pretty emotional.

Otherwise, I think we'll have to just make a mental note of this issue and ask Jimmy and number one.

When the show's over, we have the rose ceremony, Eleanor goes home. Elena is pretty much the last person who has had zero airtime. So if you didn't know who she was, that's not your fault.

I did know her though in real life. She works at Fitness First at Bonni Junction.

When were you going to tell me this?

Well?

I only realized recently. Okay, and do you know what I heard? Heard a rumor. Do you remember we spoke to Jimmy and he said that he spoke to Tim Robards at the gym at Fitness First. Yeah, remember that, And so Elena works there. So I'm like, there's absolutely no way that if Jimmy's training there on a regular basis, that he wouldn't have bumped into Elena. They would have known each other before the show started.

Oh my goodness, how have you not told me this?

Yeah? I forgot to tell you.

Sorry, mate, We've been doing batch recaps for three weeks and you've just met that bit of sourcy information to yourself. We've also been together.

Well, it's not that exciting because if she won then it would have been exciting.

She went home and also got air time. So yeah, look, it wasn't that exciting. But thank you, that was se Go. You blew my socks off. That's the most exciting thing. That's happened to me today?

Little bombshell midway through the episode. Should we get onto episode six? Now?

Episode six was a goodie. I really liked episode six.

Well, she's back, is she now? Me in it?

I'm here? And I also have really good feelings about Jay. So Jay got the single date on episode number six and I'm there with you, babe. Okay. When we did these from the very beginning, Matt picked Jay as his number one.

Girl, and I was worried because I think up until now, all she's had is the little extra moments in the business lounge, class area, whatever it's called. And she's done food tasting, she's done chess, she's done ping pong. I was like, is this girl just miss quirky? What's gonna happen? Why isn't she getting a date? I thought she was. I thought she was going to fade into the background.

And like we said earlier in this little episode that we're doing, Matt said, you know that you save the most impressive dates for the girls that you want to impress. Who would have thought? Makes complete sense? And Jay's date was awesome. It was like the old bachelor had come back. She had a helicopter. She had race cars. I don't know. They had a weird little business class lounge intimacy time set up, which actually they were just a kind of seats,

Well, actually it was a little bit better than a picnic because I had the jet ski in someone's like backyard.

Dam I forgot the jet ski. Oh my gosh. She really got the trifecta. So Jay had a helicopter. Then she had a jet ski ride, which she did blindfold it, and I mean she just looked hot in a bikini and she was extremely extremely fake tan and there was a lot going on. I enjoyed every part of it. And then Jay had to race a car. And I'm going to take a wild guess and say that MG Motors is probably a sponsor of the Bachelor this year.

Well, hang on, let's not jump to conclusions.

Laura, it's fucking wild.

I was very excited about the drag race, except Jay wasn't into it, which surprised me because she seems like somebody who would be really into an adrenaline fuel date. But apparently she had a little car accident in the past.

I can understand why Jay's feeling nervous.

Accidents can really rattle you. But this car is full of safety features, so hopefully she can relax and just have some fun.

I really love that Jimmy has emphasized that the car is full of safety features. Now, when he said that, I thought that they were going to get into like a motor car, you know that's got like a cage inside, a roll cage something, something that's going to really protect her. He gets into a car and puts a seat belt on and says, this car is full of safety features. I'm going to put ten dollars on a bet that the car she had a car accident in had a seat belt as well. Jimmy just to guess.

Yeah, So they have the race and you know, shock horror, Jimmy loses. Of course he's going to lose. He's a gentleman, do you think he set that up?

Do you think he lost on purpose?

Of course, of course, this poor girl's been in a car accident. He's not going to then drop the clutch foot down the accelerator and then try and burn poor Jay at the starting line. If you're not first, you last.

Poor Jay. So anyway, Jay wins. They have some really cute bant I actually really liked them together for a little while there. I thought that, you know, the only thing they had was the gimmicky ping pong.

In the chest.

But they're really really cute, and I'm kind of coming over to your camp. And there was a part of me after this date that made me think she might be number two. So I still think Holly's number one, but I think maybe Jay is going to be number two girl.

Now think why? Why?

Because they were just so cute and like he is so into her. So when they had the extra time and they were sitting on the economy seats that were in the business class lounge area or whatever the hell they called it, he was just like he was so into her, Like the kiss was really passionate. He did the whole hand behind the head thing and called her in.

It was absolute textbook textbook date. It takes all the boxes. It was high budget, it was multi layered. There was so much to that date as opposed to just like let's remind ourselves last episode before that was a simulator and that was it. She had helicopters, she had jet skis, she had drag racing, she had everything. And Laura. I also made note of the fact that they're both part Fijian, they both live in Sydney, they both like food. They're

Oh wow.

And the kiss was full on in a good way, like there was. There was definite sparks between the two. And when I watch a kiss, you can tell when two people are really into it. And when I was watching that kiss, Laura.

You.

Were really into it.

That's why when you came to bed with no clothes on, I was like, this woman, So.

You're trying to tell me it wasn't the athletics that got you turned on last night.

A combination bit of athletics pepping in with a bit of Bachelor and I am good to go.

Okay, Jimmy did do a Matty j Special. He went in and grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her in. That was what you did on every sea on our season. That was fun to watch. But anyway, we're not talking about you or fighting.

It's how Asha teaches us to kiss before the season starts.

So, okay, they had their group date. She gets a rose. It's no surprise.

I think she could win. I think she could win.

I don't think she's gonna win. But it was a very good date. Also, I was here for the group date this time as well. It was a great group date. The group date was that five girls out of all of those who were on the group date, got chosen to have avatars. Now, firstly, I don't know how they chose the five girls. All these girls rocked up on a group date and half them just have to stand

Quite a fun concept. And what's even more fun is the fact that Sierra was one of the girls who got picked and I just love her so much. Just when I think she's delivered all that she can, she's brought the lulls. I'm like, what else can you do to make this more entertaining? And she starts crying, which is very confusing, but we find out why everybody good? Are you okay?

I'm really skin of clowns?

Are you upset to the clowns? No comment?

No, no for the comment.

This does feel a little similar to a group date that I had on my season.

What season was that, Matthew Johnson Season five?

Where I think you had to rank yourself in order of like who was funniest or who was most selfish? And I would have to then see who was most compatible with myself?

Okay, this was the most cooked group day, Like I hated this group date. Basically there was six of us or seven of us left, I can't remember, but every single girl who was left when on this group date and we were given little podiums and the podiums had numbers on them one to seven and Osha would ask a question or Matt would ask a question, and we

You threw your toys out of the pram and I'm not doing this. You're checking it round to drive us. I'm not playing, and you.

Were taking advantage of us, and I was not playing.

You're on a reality TV show to fall in love. Of course you're being taken advantage of.

Tara and I both got out like we we just didn't want to have to argue over whether we were funnier or kinder or whatever it was. And then there were some girls from our season who kept on putting themselves on box one or two.

It was brilliant. I loved it, but it was so.

Bad because whoever got the most points, whoever was like the funniest, the prettiest, the whatever, all the things that you want to be as a person, ended up getting the extra time with Matt that day.

And both my date and this date from episode six ended in the same way, where the girls had to write a letter directed at the Bachelor, and it was all about what they want for their future, their timeline, where they want to end up, what's missing in their life.

It was quite emotional, and I think that these letters, I mean these letters were like two pages long that Jimmy had been given.

Oh, some girls are giving him like an absolute say. They were like a wad of paper, and Jimmy's like, oh fuck, hen now I've got to read through all this.

It's like timestamp. She's like, I want to get married at the beautiful church in Darling Point on the twenty second of October in twenty twenty four. Look, these letters were so detailed. Jimmy only read out a tiny paragraph of each.

But there's such sentimental letters and they're being delivered by like a clown hopping down the stairs or like a pirate. It was so weird. It was like the producers that had mushrooms the night before, me being like, let's just say this, who cares? Yeah, get a queen in there as well, who cares? And a guy addresses a wizard. No one's gonna ask any questions.

Like, no one's watching this season anyways.

Doesn't matter what we do far out.

Ashley gets the extra time in this day because her letter is the most sentimental she talks about. I kind of think, and I'm going to say this, I think ash may have leant into some things that she thought Jimmy wanted to hear. She said, it's not about quantity time, it's about quality time, which is the perfect thing to say to someone who you know is not going to be around for fifty percent of your relationship. So anyway she gets the extra time. Sierra is a little bit pissed about it.

I'm just a little bit disappointed that it was Ashley, I guess because she sas.

I felt really bad for ash during this extra time, because obviously she's had no time with Jimmy whatsoever, and this poor girl, she wanted to have time with him so badly, and straight from the get go, he was picking her story apart because she said at one point she wanted to have kids in three to five years, but then at the same time she met the right guy,

I totally agree, and I felt the same thing. I think Jimmy had already made up his mind that he was sending her home, or that she was going to be going home very soon.

Well, she didn't get a rose.

Yeah, and it was so that, like, I mean, she's thirty. Of course she's gonna say, you know, I'm thinking about having kids in the next five that's like the token answer, Yeah, five years time. No one knows what's gonna happen in five years. I said to you five or six years.

I was like, nice, try idiot.

That's just popping my contraceptive pill out.

Yeah.

Yeah, So look, I mean things changed and she said two years and he was like offended that maybe if she met the right person, she'd want to have kids in two years. He's like, God, that's too soon. And look, I get it, relationships do change it around the three to four years mark. You know, you do need to spend time with someone to get to know them. But I don't know. I just felt like she was being

Yeah, I guess the one thing that we both didn't like though with this episode is the fact that he didn't give her the rose. And then it was the next day at the cocktail party that Jimmy entered said hi to everybody, b lined it for Ash, took her outside and had a conversation with her, and at that point he said, Hey, I'm going to send you home because I really see you as nothing more than a friend.

Or he could have just sent her home at the row ceremony. I think like the calling her out and doing it in front of everyone and making a big deal about it. I mean, on one hand, yes, of course, I think it's noble to make the choice to send someone home. It's a hard decision to make, but I actually think it's like way more dramatic and more embarrassing sending someone home in the middle of a cocktail party.

Had your hair and makeup done, you've got your dress on.

At least if you wait to the row ceremony, you get to say goodbye to your friends. Like, she just got fucking walked out the front and he was like, okay, hop in the car now. She didn't even get to say bite anyone.

She's like a fake tan for this. I've got fake lashes on. Really, dude, you could have just told me, like in an hour after I had a few free champagnes.

Yeah. So look, Ash went home, and I feel like it was the first time we actually got to see or have anything to do with Ash. I think from the very start of that episode we knew she was going home because it was the first time that she'd been given any airtime, and all the girls were really upset that Ash was gone, and also that they didn't get an opportunity to say goodbye to her.

Oh my god, I wasn't expecting that.

Eg's really upsetting.

I'm really surprised. Yeah, but guys.

We're all saying, so that's a position too soon.

Too soon.

I love her so much.

Look, she's the person that you love to hate but hate to love. I don't even know if that makes sense, but I love her that I don't hat well said?

Can I ask Laura in that situation, would she have literally hopped in a limousine and gone or would she have driven back then to collect her bags and say goodbye to everybody else? Like? Do you actually get a chance to say goodbye to the girls if you leave outside of a rose ceremony?

So we hadn't happened a couple of times on our season. I can't remember. I know that Charlene went home early during a cocktail party, and I know that somebody else, Oh, another girl went home just after a date. So it was Liz Liz. So this is where to our season, guys, Liz went home on one of those double dates, you know how, like on The Bachelor's sometimes they'll send two girls off on a single date together and only one person comes home.

Two girls leave and only one comes back to.

Girls one cup. That's definitely a different show.

Sends keep this PG for this episode. You're disgusting.

Yeah, since you were derailing pretty quickly, aren't we. Anyways, we're coming to the end I think it's fifty to fifty. Sometimes you get a quick opportunity to say goodbye. But I think in this instance with Ash, I actually don't think she would have said goodbye. I think Jimmy would have put her in the car, and then what would have happened is she would have been sitting in the car and producers would have brought her bags out to

Unless you've been given a rose on your date or group extension.

Exactly, you have to pack everything up as though you're going home. And they say to you, if you leave anything, you can't get it, like, we're not going to fucking mail your shampoo back, We're not gonna mail you your toothbrush. Don't forget anything, make sure you've packed it all up. So I reckon she would have been sitting in the car and producers obviously would have known she was going home, and they'd been like, hey, Goshley, have a safe trip, you know, enjoying McDonald's on the way home.

I'm so upsetting did you have Did you always pack your bags for every row ceremony.

Every single rose ceremony. I was not cocky at all. Some girls would leave their stuff out, and the producers were like, if you get sent home, we will we will not pack your bag for you. We will not be getting anything that you like you out And some of the girls were like, ah, I'm not going home on.

This cockta buddy, Yeah, but not you, Laura ben.

Here I am. My stuff is still la strewn across the floor. But anyway, guys, that is it. That's episodes five and six.

I feel like next week there's going to be a lot more people watching because the Olympics will be over.

And for anybody who's missed the first couple of episodes, you know what, you don't have to go back and watch it on tenplay. You can just jump on and listen to the batcherycabs. Probably funnier, maybe a little bit less reliable, but.

You will get more fart jokes.

And more bodily functions. In general.

Lot's to look forward to. Can I also just say no no, I just want to say obviously people can tell it a little bit sick right now.

Oh, Crimy River and.

Hey, don't worry, though, guys, I've persevered. I'm not one hundred percent, but I'll stop at nothing to get this podcast done, because you know I do this for you guys listening right now.

Do you know how hard it is living with a man who has the man flu and not not COVID, living with a man who has man flu.

I have cooked dinner two nights in a row right now, and I've done the dishwasher the last five times in a row. So just be careful what you say.

Laura, you are a god. You are like hercules.

You don't know how good you have it.

Every single time Matt does something, every single time he cooks, every time he cleans, every time he wipes the toilet bowl, He's like, you don't know how good you have it, Laura. I am an excellent husband. Other men don't do anything.

I feed our children, and I'm like, look look what I do for you in this family.

Yesterday, Matt was like, I helped you with the kids. I was like, they're your kids.

I babysit them on a regular basis.

And you really glad that you guys are getting get insight into this relationship. We only had a couple of fights on this record, but they were cute fights and like, we're gonna go and have a cuddle now, so you know, it's been fun.

Guy.

Hey, mixed signals? Are you? Is that an invitation? Because iache I'm picking up what you're putting down, Laura.

Anyway, guys, that is it from us. We're hothing you have enjoyed another Bachelor recap. We need a little song or a jingle for this. It's recaptime.

Oh my god, no no, just hey, tell your friends, tell your family, tell tell Jimmy, tell Sierra because.

And share the love and the love.

Because really love love. Oh thank god, that's over.