Guys, guess who's back. Welcome to another episode of Life on Cut. Spoiler it's us.
We're back.
We had a week off, guys, and we are so sorry, but we had a little mini vacate.
We actually did try to.
Record for you.
We took our equipment up. It was a really big mission. We failed miserably. It went to hell in a hand basket.
But we are back.
We are rejuvenating.
On hell in a hand's not even a saying.
Yeah, when something goes terribly it goes to hell in a hand basket, not.
Once in my thirty I don't want to say how you.
Were on The Bachelor with Nick Cummens, who had the most outrageous one liners, and you're going to pull me up on going to hell in a hand basket.
Yeah, but he was just like slide out like a lizard drinking in the.
Same thing about her and a handbasket. Also, if that's completely incorrect, do not dm me.
I don't want to know about it.
I'm going to keep on saying it don't add us.
So yeah, like.
Brit said, we did bring the equipment up to Byron. We had great intentions. It went terribly, terribly wrong. So instead, we are well rested and here to bring you the best content that your ears have Heather listened to.
You know what the worst part of that was, actually we still put in the effort and the hours, so we still did all the research. We still sat down for half a day and recorded and did everything so for nothing. So we wasted this our precious, precious, precious holiday time trying to and I mean we just have to accept defeat.
Sometimes sometimes things just don't work.
We did also have someone who we were interviewing and I maybe didn't press record.
Look, it's thin Ice, Laura. It's a touchy subject and it's too soon, so.
I don't want to talk about that.
It's the first time it's ever happened. But it happened, guys, with lac Efron. She didn't hit record, and Brittany's chances gone. He's now dating enormy.
You realize you were the reason. And I'm not dating zach Efron.
You can blame me for all your problems in life. But anyway, guys, it's nice to be back. Thank you to everybody who understood. Also, you know, we this isn't our full time job. This is like a really like fun extra thing that we do that we love doing for you guys, and we get so much out of it, but we do put.
The time in like it's a full time job, but it's not our main job totally.
And so you know, there are definitely weeks and from time to time when we find it really difficult to bring you the consistency of content that you guys are used to, But we obviously put all our time and energy into trying to bring you two episodes a week, and we just want to reassure you that.
We are back, baby, and what on that hate when you sing so much?
Sing it?
Well, on that note, I guess now we can say it.
We have actually looked back over the year and almost year and a half we've been doing this, and we were like, how many episodes have we actually missed.
Or not given on time? And there aren't actually many.
There's been a few in the last month or two that might have been a little bit late, as in a couple of hours.
And we can now tell you that that is because.
Laura has been insanely unwell with her second baby.
I'm having a baby.
I mean, woo, it's so weird.
Don't get too excited Laura, No, I'm really really excited. I mean, it's it's obviously been something that's been happening for a while now. There is a little part of me that feels bad that I've kept it from you guys, and like exactly what Britt said, I was really sick with morning sickness for the first trimester. But yeah, I've seen the light, the light at the end of the tunnel of the second trimester. Times are good. Well, we will get into some questions.
I have some questions for you, but I just want to say, like just so you guys can understand, and it's been hard because we haven't been able to tell you. There were some times some days where we were recording, and this is why some of them didn't get you
on time. Some days would be recording and Laura's looking at me and I was like, oh shit, you don't look well, and she'd be like she'd start with her mouth and I was like, oh my god, you've got to vomit, and she'd literally have to run to the bathroom. And there were just times she was physically like unable to sit here and hold a conversation for an hour and a half and I was like, babe, it's okay, Like, if you can't do it, we can't get the episode out.
There was this one day that we were recording and I had such bad intergestion. I just kept spuburbing into the microphone and then I had to spend like four hours trying to edit out every single time I stopped started because I couldn't breathe properly.
So these are the things that we've been going through.
It was ridiculous. But anyway, Laura, congratulations.
I know obviously I've known for a long time, but it's really exciting news.
How do you feel that you can actually now share it, get this weight off your shoulders?
Well at first day, I just want to say thanks to everybody from our community as well who's been so incredibly supportive, especially because, like I mean, if you've been listening to Life on Cut from the beginning, then you know I've been really open with our pregnancy journey and that Matt and I have had a couple of miscarriages now, and so that was one of the biggest reasons why I wasn't really comfortable with sharing it, and I kind of was just not that I was in denial, like
I definitely was like, I'm pregnant, but I was kind of in denial that maybe this baby was going to stick around for a little while, so I didn't want to make it public and then I have to go
through another public conversation about miscarriage. So firstly, before I get too excited and two ahead of myself, I just want to recognize that I know that if there's anybody listening to this episode who's currently going through a really difficult fertility journey, it can be a real slap in the face to hear another happy pregnancy announcement, and I just want to say, like, I really recognize that, and I know what that feels like, and so I really
feel I really hope that you get your rainbow baby, Like I genuinely mean that in regards to like Matt and I. I guess we're like fully halfway now. But it's really different with your second baby, because, like with Marley, I was so in tune with the pregnancy. I was like, oh today, my baby's a blueberry. Now my baby's the size of an orange, it's growing eyelids.
Now you forget your pregnant.
Honestly, I like, get to two o'clock in the afternoon, I'm like, God, I've got that indigestion. Oh, that's the foot in my lung.
There we are.
Anyway, I'm at the point in the pregnancy now where I'm not talking about the glowy, gorgeous wonderfulness of pregnancy. I'm talking about how like your vagina starts getting fat and your nipples go black, and why is there a beard growing on my stomach?
Hang on, winder back. Your vagina gets.
Fat, Your vagina gets.
So fat, what do you mean like chubb like chubby.
It looks like well, mine doesn't look like it yet, but like low and behold at nine months, some people get a really swollen vagina. It bluid like a chicken breast. Just think of a really juicy chicken breast.
And that is.
Let's move along to the hairy beard on your tummy, which at the nine month mark when I had Marley, I was shaving your stomach or the floppyga.
All of you above my stomach.
I really hope that there's other like pregnant women out there are people who have kids who listen to this and relate like pregnancy just does the weirdest shit to your body.
It's not normal.
It's well, it is normal, we just don't talk about it, from like growing excess hair, to losing your hair, to getting a fat vagina, to your nipples going black, or to your nipples getting really long, like all this weird stuff happens and nobody talks about it.
We'll see.
The thing is, I didn't know any of that. I don't know what you just said. I just thought you had a harry stomach. I was gonna say, in a fat vagina, but like that's awkward. Oh you see me in a bikini. So no. But but for real, it's actually nice to hear someone talk about the things that no one does talk about, because I'm sure there's a lot of women out there like me right now being like what.
Vagina puts on way.
But I guess the thing as well is is like it's one of the reasons well, I mean, this is my assumption, but I think it's one of the reasons why we struggle so much with the changes that our body goes through when we're pregnant. And that's because like there's only very limited aspects of that that we talk about. We don't really talk about varicus veins. We don't really
talk about like fluid retention. And I think that there's like this lack of preparation for just how weird shit gets with your body, and like a lot of it goes back to normal, A lot of it kind of there is this once the baby comes out, it kind of like slowly gradually goes back to a new a new normal, not the same but very similar.
Not a streamline.
Let's say, I'm no twenty year old, but yeah, I think it's really important for women to talk about these things and be open about it so that when you are pregnant and shit starts going really weird, you're like, hey, that's okay.
That go from The Bachelor had a fat vagina too.
I feel less alone.
No, but absolutely, I just aren't wait for Daily Mail to write an article about this.
I just so you guys know and heads up to you, Laura. I will be asking a lot of questions over the next couple of months and keeping you guys informed as to the progress of Laura's vagina, Laura's hair situation. But how let's tell everyone how far actually are you right now? So I'm twenty one weeks all right, let's do the math is that five months. Yeah, it's like, well, I guess, I don't know. Twenty one weeks is like five months. I'm just over halfway. Yeah, okay, so congratulations on keeping
that a secret. God knows how you have done that. I feel like watching your progress, I don't feel like you popped until.
Like really recently.
Yeah, I guess.
Also, it's been pretty easy to keep it under wraps. I mean, one, it was isolation, so like no one was really leaving the house. Who it was winter, so I was wearing like big baggy clothes, and like three, no one.
Really cares about me anymore. So it's also it's really easy.
No they did.
There were some moments that Laura and I we might have taken a cute photo or something. She's like, you can't post that preggers. So we were trying to filter some stuff out.
And there were actually some people, some people from this community and also people who follow me on Instagram who had started to tweak to it. So I was starting to get a lot of messages from people saying, hey, I have a feeling that you're pregnant, which is a kind of a weird thing to text someone, but they were correct.
So yeah, to everybody who tweeked to it. Congratulations, you win the Lucky Door prize. You in all right, let's just wind it back to the start, because I think the most important thing, and I think it really shows like who's the most important person in your life and who you love the most and who's the best Who.
Did you tell first?
Okay, so Britt says this because I told Brit, So the very first person I told was Brit. Also, like when I was pregnant last time, Brit was the very first person I told. And then Britt was also the very first person I told that I was having a miscarriage. So, like you seem to be really like my point of contact,
my touch point for these things. Love that I told Britt first, And like I said, I was in a bit of denial because this pregnancy happened very very quickly after the miscarriage that I had, which I spoke about in one of that episodes if you want to go back and listen to it. This happened really really soon after, and much to Matt's disappointment, he thought he was going to get a little bit more sexy time out of me, but he did not. The man is very potent. I
kept it to myself for a really long time. I didn't tell anyone apart from Britt. I didn't tell Matt for about three or four weeks until I was actually going to have my scan. So the day I was going for my scan is the day that I told Matt. And I don't I kind of feel bad for doing that, and I Matt wasn't annoyed or anything. He understood. But my reasoning for not wanting to tell him was because if I had gone through another miscarriage, I didn't want to have to disappoint him again. I wanted it to
be like, a, Hey, I'm going from a scan. I'm gonna find out today if the baby has a heartbeat and if everything's okay. So you're gonna know by this afternoon if everything's okay. So I kind of pushed it as far out as possible because I just didn't want to go through that again. It's been stressful as much as if there's been parts of it I've enjoyed. There's been parts of this pregnancy so far. That's it's really hard to enjoy a pregnancy after having pregnancy loss.
Yeah, and I can.
I can one hundred percent see both sides of that. I can see why Matt would have been.
Like, Babe, like, why didn't you tell me straight away?
But I can see why you after having two miscarriages and you'd literally just miscarried recently, I can see why you were like, I can't just disappoint him again, and I just want to make sure this feeling of like making sure it's safe, and I mean, you sort of have to tell me.
I guess we spend so much time together and it's.
And also like Matt kind of knew because for us, like the most challenging parts in our relationship that we've ever had has been during my first trimester of pregnancy, because I turn into a psychopathic, crazy.
Hormonal witch.
I can confirm that, like angry about everything, crying about things irrationally, like I just can't control. I have so little patience, And normally I would like to think that I'm a relatively chilled person, but during the first trimester, I just feel so angry and like frustrated and just so quick to temper. And Matt had said to me a few times, are.
You sure you're not pregnant?
Like usually when you're a bit angry, He's like, are you sure you don't have your periods? And now he's like, bitch, you're pregnant, Like there's something going on here.
So he well and truly had sniffed it out.
Moments where Matt was like, hey, babe, have you seen where I put my hat? And Laura was like, don't want to you.
Just put it away where it blongs.
And I was like, I know I'm close to this couple, but I cannot intervene here. It's like, Matt, your hat is hanging on the door. It was a lot, but anyway, as soon as you get past that. I don't know if other people experience it, but as soon as I got past that first trimester, like things kind of go back to normal and I'm not quite possessed demon, so
everything's good. Now you're for sure emotional, and I think there was this time too that you and I were like our emotions were feeding off each other, like one of you would start to cry and I'd be like I'm upset too, Like I was almost like I was the sympathy pregnancy partner.
But well, this was all happening during your Bachelor Paradise stuff, so it was obviously a really heightened period for you as well. And then I was having my own emotional stresses around this, and so yeah, we were just a bundle of hormones.
Guys. I'm really glad we got through that together though.
And big question, big question from the people, are you going to find out or have you found out? If I'm pregnant, if I'm allowed in the delivery suite, if what you're having.
We don't know.
We have no idea for having a boy or a girl. Mally was a surprise. I love surprises, and I think that having a surprise baby. I think that not knowing the gender of your baby is like one of the most beautiful surprises. So yeah, I don't know. But I had this really overwhelming feeling when I first found out I was pregnant that it's a boy, Like I have really strong boy vibes, which I never got any vibes
with Maley. I was like, I hope that this is a human child, whereas this time I'm like, this is a this is a boy.
I must yeah, I must admit. I think, you know how it just comes out.
I think when we started talking about it, I had said I can't wait to meet him or whatever. I think I had dropped the he pronoun, so maybe subconsciously I think it's a boy too.
They go, well, anyway, maybe that's enough baby chat, just to like, is it.
I mean we're gonna talk about the next four months.
We'll definitely not.
I mean, I might talk about my long black nipples, but like that's my last week.
I know, and I guess, yeah, I mean, we'll talk about it later, but I guess we'll have a couple of weeks break.
Laura is in the birthday week podcasting. I'll just give you a minute by a minute update.
Don't worry.
Well, tell me what's been happening in your world?
God, nothing as exciting as that. No, we went to Byron Bay. We had a great little week. It was.
It was a funny week because we were still sort of working but were seming on BAK. But something really cute did happen. Actually, I was saying with my girlfriends and they have these two little girls that are like four and five, and they watched me on the Bachelor, and like they obviously at five years old, they didn't they don't understand it. But they're allowed to watch Arnie Brittany like dating on.
You're this TV prince Sacy. You're like, wow, she's from the DV The Magical.
And yeah, they just think I'm in the ants pants because TV is so big to a.
Five year old.
Anyway, they've obviously understand to some extent that I've been dumped twice, Like they get that I'm single.
Anyway, we're at home.
They're doing these little arts and crafts on the table together and they're like, greaty, we're making you a handbag because I was going out to dinner that night, and I was like, amazing, thank you, and they're like, you have to take it to dinner tonight and I was like, of course I will. They're coloring away, and then a couple of minutes later they put their head up they.
Go, they go, how do you spell single?
They're just making you a walking banner for you to take to dinner. I'm not kidding.
In my heart just like skipped a beat, broke all these feelings at once. Anyway, I spelled it out to them across the room and the girls will like.
It's spelled d Pete, depressing.
No I was. I spelt it for them and then they didn't skip a beat. They didn't look up.
But they were writing, they were coloring, and they were just saying to themselves, we just don't want Arnie Brittany to be alone. And my heart they're five and my heart just broke.
Anyway, were you like the kids, you need to listen to our single in your thirties episode. It could be a really empowering time in your life. Okay, you don't need no man.
Anyway. It gets worse.
Then I had to take it to dinner. Then they coached me through how I should walk into the restaurant. So I had to carry the single bag and I had to walk in and they coached me on my walk. I had to walk like a model for like ten meters and then when I hit the ten meter mark, I had to start to wave like the queen to people and gently say hello, Hi. That's what they said. So they're like, we think that this is what you need to do. This is five year old. Anyway, didn't work.
Did you do it though?
Did you take the single bag and did you promote your single them? Okay, I took this single bag because they watched me walk out of the house, so like take you back, yea, because I was like taking it anyway, my bad.
I left in the car.
Then I get into the restaurant and I see this really attractive guy. He's with his friend and I'm with my two friends. And we were like making eyes at each other across the table the whole night, and I was.
Like, surely, like I feel like I am giving them his big signals.
You can do that with your eyes. I felt like he was giving me them back. And I thought, surely by the end of the night, he's gonna come over and say something or whatever.
Anyway, well like.
If only I had a sign like a billboard looks like my bumble billboard and my single bag. No, I thought he didn't come over at the end, and I was like, you know what, if I took this single bag out, I could have waved it acroround the restaurant and maybe something would have happened.
So that's my fault, really, for not taking my new handbag out.
Or maybe he had a girlfriend and that's why he didn't approach you, because no matter if you had a single bag or not, he was looking from a far and appreciating but could not touch.
Or maybe it's just this thing that assist that our generation does, where we don't approach anyone in real life thanks to.
The world of online dating.
Yeah, anyway, I just thought that was a really cute story, and I love that I have five year olds even on my bandwagon to find me love bless their souls.
Well, I feel like with that sort of cheerleader behind you, like, it's really a matter of time.
Yeah.
I was like, I was like, put a sign out at school girls, maybe someone's dad.
But should we tell the people what the episode's going to be about.
Oh you don't we get into accidentally unfiltereds Yeah, you do it because I just spoke for ag Okay, fucking lazy, all right, So okay, we have thought a lot about this episode, and we have been having this conversation for the last couple of weeks. It was really spurred on by what has been happening on The Bachelor and the whole Irena Bella cat Fights saga, the media dramatization of the whole thing, and also like a lot of the conversations that have been happening back and forth on the
Facebook group in regards to it as well. But we wanted to talk about mean girls and the psychology of mean girls, like not just from a top level of like, you know, we all know the girls can be nasty to each other, but really from like a deeper understanding of where it comes from, why we do it, and is it something that you know only other people do or is it something that we ourselves are also guilty of on different varying levels. So we're really gonna unpack
this whole understanding being girls psychology. Yeah, I do feel like I've been seeing it everywhere lately, so I'm happy to delve into that. And there's some really interesting research, so we will get into that.
Before we do, you.
Know where it's time for It's accidentally Unfiltered.
I thought I was going to sing that with you.
I really wish I had a singing career. Maybe in a formal life I did. Accidentally Unfiltered. Guys, we love this section. You tell us your most embarrassing stories. We read them out and we froth them. So let's get into it and we laugh at you, all right. Story number one.
This one's so funny. I was at work and I'm training really really hard to get put on full time so that I'm putting in some extra effort to be the best possible worker.
I can possibly be.
I've only been part time for a while now, and I really want this job. It was fifteen minutes before my shift ended and it was just me and the boss in our tiny little office. I was quickly texting my boyfriend what time I was going to be home. He responds by telling me to get home asap because he is down for some sex. Hell, yeah, it's been ages. As I was leaving, my boss was talking to me and texted me this big, long list on what he needed to be done for the next week so that
we can be prepared for it. As I'm walking to my car, I am so excited to be hanging home to finally get laid and message my boyfriend in a frantic state. The message said, oh my god, Yes, baby, I've worked so damn hard this week and I'm so horny. I cannot wait. I cannot wait for you to fuck me hard. I was so excited and friendshiply hyping that I didn't look you I send the message to And yes, I sent that straight to my boss.
Rip me dead? What is wrong with me? Anyway? I'm quitting, she.
Boss, how would you even go to work the next day and be like, look, I have been putting in a lot of hard work lately, imagine, and I deserve that.
I've worked really hard, so fuck me.
He would have been like, oh my god, this is sexual harassment claim waiting to happen.
Hey, Sarah, can you please report to HR in the morning. Open.
Don't worry about doing that least, Like, let's just scrap some of those things off.
You don't have to repay me for that. I fucking lowell, What a low would it be?
Wow? Okay, I really like that one. I don't know minus is good, but I'm gonna give it a crack. Huh. All right.
I was at my parents' house and I was having some technical troubles with my laptop. So Dad told me to bring it over, give it to him, and I'll have a look. So we put my laptop on the kitchen counter and I opened up the Internet. As the problem that I was having was to do with Google Chrome. You know how like your top five most used sites come up on your home screen. Well, I had the Google Chrome homepage open for a good five minutes. My dad was feeling around with things, and then he said, oh,
interesting selection of websites you have here. What is torn up just what a second time from porn site. The second most frequented site was pornhub. At least she's got a healthy appetite.
Look, it's been isolation. That's all anyone's doing. I was curiously masturbating to themselves.
Obviously.
The dad's cool with it because he called it out, which I loved because he didn't make it awkward. He was like, I like what you do on their doll pornab literally is one big virus. Like that's what is known for sex and virus. You go there for a sex and virus, not an STD. Well I laptop STD yes.
You just like. I love that.
Now she's like, hey, dad, so my computer's been infected with some sort of sex spot.
Can you please fix me?
I would have rather paid a strange to do it than my dad.
I have.
I have one more, actually unfiltered, which actually comes from a girlfriend.
That you're putting your hand up to me, like I was.
Talking to my girlfriend recently and I and I do this to all my friends now. Whenever I have seen someone who I haven't seen in a little while, I'm like, hey, I know you listen to the podcast. Give me your most embarrassing stories, and nobody tells me they're embarrassing stories anymore. But a girlfriend of mine, my girlfriend was telling telling me about how she wanted to start using something more environmentally friendly than using like tampons or pads or whatever.
And she'd bought a moon cup online. And I'm yet to use a moon cup, so this is get to either.
But all my friends do.
This is all very foreign to me. So she had bought a moon cup and she'd been using it. She looked at the instructions whatnot, and she was like, cool, we're good with this, and she wore it to work this day. So she works in an office. She wore I love you say, like it's an outfit.
She inserted it and used it at work.
That she wore it to work.
They have a unisex toilet at her office and she works with loads of guys because she works in construction. Anyway, she went into the office and it was on site, so that's why it's a communal toilet, because it's like, you know, a kind of a makeshift work side toilet. She went in and she went to change her moon cup and.
She pulled it out with such aggressive fall that she flicked period blood, the whole moon cup of period blood all over the all over her pants, all over the wall, and all up the door.
I'm actually I want to die for her. Hang on the walls I can deal with because you can.
Wipe that off, like the door, like right in front, so she like flicked it in front and it just went everywhere.
Yeah, this is a prime example of why I do not want us a moon car.
I just don't.
I still don't understand the mechanics of how she did it. This is also a girlfriend of mine who needed to pee so bad that she peed herself whilst running down the stairs and then slipped in it and like did her elbow. So she's dropped some great not drunk, not drunk out of like you know, when dogs get really excited, they just like pee on the spot. She just has probably very very poor public floor muscles. Anyway, she has some crazy bodily function stories. I am here for them.
Hang on, I need the end of the story.
What did she do?
How do you know?
She was like I had to try and clean it up.
She's like, but it just looked like shark week in there, and then I had to try and explain to everyone.
So when you walk out and you're like, do not go in there.
That's literally every time Matthew Johnson leaves the bathroom, he's like, we need to renovate the whole house buy a new bathroom.
He cops it on this.
He loves it though, So guys, for today's episode, we want to talk about mean girl behavior in adults because it's something that isn't just prevalent when we go through school. I think that everybody has experienced at some point in their adult life, whether it be exclusion from another female, or it be bullying at work in the workplace, or it be gossiping or rumors or some other very toxic
way that women can interact with each other. And firstly, before we fully get into this episode, I just really want to say, like, bullying is non exclusive. We're not saying that women are bullies and men aren't. Men can be absolutely shit too, However, we do seem to express ourselves in very different ways. I think men are far
more physical and they're far more verbal. When they are angry or aggressive about something or they take issue with something, they don't step away from confrontation in the same way that women do. Women can be far more fearful of confrontation, which means that we use and tend to use more nonverbal cues when we are aggressive or when we are angry about something.
Men are more direct, more aggressive, more verbally aggressive, more physically aggressive, and their issues are resolved quicker because they just come out with it, deal with their behavior, and they move on. Women it's more subtle. It's very manipulative. It's like a slow burn. It's excluding people slowly from a group. It's the whispers, it's the rumors, it's the gossip, and that's because we generally don't like the direct confrontation.
So from everything I've read that they've just said, this starts from a young age with boys and girls. You can see boys fighting it out and wrestling from like age five, and then you can see the girls sitting in their groups and turning their backs on another girl. And so I think it starts from a very young age and it's interesting to watch that progress through all the years to adulthood because it's still very prevalent in adulthood.
Yeah, and I think, like you know, a perfect example of this, not to bring everything back to the Bachelor, but it's something that we've seen very recently is the physical bif that happened between in Matt and how their intensity and their argument resulted in actual fight, and then how we're seeing this slow simmering cattiness that's happening between Bella and Irena and the conversation and the way that they're being pitted against each other in the media, and
also the manipulation that kind of happens and the exclusion I think is a really really big one. And this type of behavior is called relational aggression. So relational aggression is a predominantly female form of bullying. It's non physical aggression towards another person with the purpose of bringing down their reputation or their social status. One of the big reasons why we actually do this to other women is because by bringing somebody else down, in theory, it's a
way of elevating ourselves. Whether that is done consciously or unconsciously, that seems to be the theory behind it. And like the competitive nature of how women fight and why we kind of look at somebody else and go, hmm, I don't like that person, but maybe don't have a good reason for why we don't like that person.
When I was.
Looking at this, taking a deep dive and just thinking back to how I was brought up and the issues that I faced growing up, and I couldn't get past the cult movie Mean Girls isn't that interesting. I don't think that there is anyone out there that wouldn't know what Mean Girls is. But essentially it's like to to teenagers, it's glorifying bullying and mean gol behavior because it's making it look like the popular cute, hot girls are really nasty.
And the main quote that that I think that if anyone can quote anything from that movie, it's the line where she says, you can't sit with us, and I think that that is.
A prime example of female bullying.
It's like the exclusion, and that's that has gone out to every single woman in the last I guess fifteen years, I think. And I think that that's just really set the tone for teenagers coming through for the way women think it's okay to behave. And I just don't think you could ever make a movie.
Like that now.
I would like to think that that's left in school, you know, and that women we grow and we mature and we don't have those same behaviors. But the reality is is like, yes, in a lot of ways, we grow when we do mature. But when we were unpacking this conversation, I was like, oh, yes, people can be mean on social media. These people over here do this.
But then when I actually started to really look at myself, my own language, the things that I say and do about other women, I realized, actually, this is something that I'm guilty of as well, maybe a much smaller scale, but it made me really question where it comes from. For example, I was I was with Matt and we were looking through Instagram, like a few weeks back when this conversation first started, and Matt saw a photo of like a girl that I follow and she's really beautiful.
She's very young, she's like twenty two years old, stunning, and he was like, oh wow, she's really hot. And my instant reaction to him saying oh wow, she's really hot was yeah, but she's only twenty two, which at the time I didn't think anything negative of it, but Matt was kind of like, oh, okay, yep, Like he didn't make a big deal about it, but it made me feel a little bit like why did I say that?
Why did I need to devalue her by instantly giving a caveat on why she's beautiful, and I realized that that actually played into my insecurities, being that I'm thirty four, I obviously don't look like I'm twenty two, and as a society, we really do prize beauty, we really do prize youth. It was me dealing with my own insecurities and projecting those insecurities on this other person, who is
incredibly beautiful, full stop, has done absolutely nothing wrong. But there is this competition that we feel as women from time to time, whether that be on a surface level, as a physical level, whether it be in the workplace, because we're competing for different roles, pitted against each other in a way that means that there is this defensiveness that can sometimes come out in our language, in the way that we speak on a day to day level with our friends, with our partners about other women.
Well, it's a defense mechanism, isn't it. It's just this.
Idea that straight away you feel like you don't want to feel in your situation. You don't want to feel like your old news, and you don't want to You can never compare yourself to a twenty year old because you're not a twenty year old, You're a thirty three year old, and it comes from a place where you just don't I don't feel like you're enough, or you're
worried that you're not gonna be enough. And I think that if every time that you make a comment like that, not you, I mean the general public, myself, everyone, every time you make a comment like that, you need to do what you do what you did and sit there and say, Okay, why did I why did I just say that? So I think it's the whole conversation is going to be brought back to really checking yourself and
checking why you've made that statement. I pride myself and trying to be really a really good, supportive human and a supportive friend and not gossip about people. But I'd be lying if I said I haven't done that in the past one hundred percent. Whether that's a generic statement even about a celebrity like someone I don't even know, which this is really common as well, celebrities come out
and do something or say something. I think the new song and film clip wap with us pussy, Well, the thing is when that first came out without even giving myself time to dissect it.
Think about it, critique it.
I was just like, WHOA, that is too much. Would not want my daughter listening to that, not want my daughter singing that, doing that, dancing that. And then I'm really sort of satting that for a second, and I thought, well, hang on, they're actually just really embracing their sexuality. They are singing lyrics and acting in a way that men have done, like male rappers have done for years. Like the way men talk about women has been derogatory, sexualized
for as long as we can remember. But then the second women speak about themselves in that manner, we get our backs up and we get on this bandwagon of like, you can't act like that, when in fact, why not.
We should be the ones that are allowed.
To speak and express our sexuality like that, as opposed to letting men speak about us like that.
Abby Chatford actually made a really interesting comparison with that song, and I really really agree with it. She I can't remember it word for words, so I don't want to miss quote or anything, but she did say, like, you know, you listen to the lyrics of wet Ass Pussy, and then you listen to the lyrics of like from the windows, to the walls, to the sweat dripping down my balls, or you bitches crawl. It's like, why do we sing that?
And that's like such a fun and okay song, but yet there's something in us that feels like innately repulsed by a woman taking absolute control of her sexuality. And one of the things that we really started to look at when we unpack this is that there's two different reasons why this has kind of come about and how we've been socially conditioned to kind of fall into this. And it is a bit of a broad sweeping stereotype. I'm not going to say that all women behave like this.
It's a spectrum. We all have different aspects of this, and nobody at all is completely perfect or has zero internalized sexism. But one of the theories behind why as women we feel really competitive around other women is because of evolution. So and this is like, this is a real theory, guys, Darwinism. We see other women as a threat, whether it be in a career workplace in modern society, or whether it be for relationships or to be able
to like expand our brood. And also because we play so much importance in our society on beauty and also on youth, you know, and I look back at myself saying exactly that about someone who's a decade younger than myself and needing to use that as a justification for why it makes me feel makes me feel insecure about myself.
Yeah.
Well, with what you just said about it's evolutionary Darwinism, I just wanted to add something to that from if we're looking back to where this started, and there are studies on this, some psychologists say it's actually just hardwired.
Into us from the beginning.
And there are these studies of chimpanzees and apes that have shown that the female chimpanzees actually attack and kill other females and their babies. And this is literally to ensure that they get the best chance at survival and the best chance at living a great life.
I know, but this is what it is.
They're like, Okay, there's too much competition here, there's not enough room for all these females, so they kill them and their kids, their little baby chimps. Then they even sometimes ally themselves with other males so that no other woman woman, no other female. Now are the chimpanzee women, well,
no other female chimp will then stand a chance. And then you throw this into our workplace, historically patriarchal society, and it's just like, no wonder women now try to knock each other down because we have such limited resources and limited chances to become powerful in our workplace, to have high powered positions, CEO positions. It's known that women have smaller chance. So it's normal and we've done it
from backing the chimpanzees. It's normal to want to start to slowly knock each other off so that you're more likely to get the position. And it's crazy to think about just kick her out of the boardroom.
No, it's brutal. They literally just like slaughter each other.
But I mean, I guess like this is a very crude and rudimentary way of looking at it, but there is some method to the madness with this. So evolutionary theory was one of the ways that they unpack why women have this competitive nature towards each other. And then the second reason, which is something that we really delved into,
is this idea of internalized sexism. And Shameless has done an awesome episode which we really recommend you guys go listen to and that's all about internalized misogyny, which is basically the same thing. They spocus very much on how it presents itself in the media, But internalized feminism has this idea we are products. Even if we live in a very modern, twenty twenty society, we are still products of the society in which we have been raised and
of the constructs from which we are raised. And you know, as much as things are changing and we are progressing, there is still double standards that are uphold from time to time between men and women, and we still have this idea around femininity, how women are supposed to behave, what is acceptable and what isn't acceptable, and when someone steps outside of that boundary of what's acceptable, there is
something about that that's innately threatening to us. And a really interesting and I think such an amazing example of this is if you guys have watched the it's a relatively new series that's come out. It's called Missus America. It's all based around the movement of Equal Rights Amendment, which was in the seventies, where women will lo being
for equal rights to men. And the really really and the part about this series which is really interesting is the unexpected backlash that the movement received by conservative activists who were actually led by other women. So it was women who at the time were housewives who had very traditional roles who saw this push for equality as a real threat to their understanding and what they'd been conditioned
to believe is acceptable. And I think we would be so hard pressed in modern society to find a movement of women in Australia or in the States who would say that equality for men and women is not good for women, Like I think we'd be hard pressed to find people who would think that that's a bad idea. I think in modern society most women would agree that.
I should hope.
Most people would agree that having the right to vote as a woman is empowering and absolutely necessary, and it is exactly what we should be entitled to to have equal standing to male gender. However, to think that in the seventies there was a whole movement of women who were against this really shows that we can be conditioned and we are products of the society that we're raised in. So let's like fast forward and bring that into twenty twenty.
It got me thinking, and what it got me thinking was like, when I see someone who posts something really overtly sexual on Instagram. It doesn't affect me. I don't really care about the content like it doesn't. It doesn't upset me or phase me. But there's something in me that goes that's too much, like why would you post that?
And I guess it's this idea in the conversation we wanted to have was like being really aware of the thoughts that you have and where they come from, because we're all guilty of it to.
Some varying degree.
And if you find yourself slut shaming or questioning why someone's behaving in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, maybe it doesn't really make you feel uncomfortable. Maybe it makes you feel uncomfortable because that's what you've been socially conditioned to think is appropriate or inappropriate, and that person is behaving in a way that falls outside our very rigid ideas around femininity. Well, psychology today does actually say they support this, and they say what it is. It's
women projecting their unwanted parts onto another woman. So these are things like jealousy, the envy, rage, anxiety, lack of confidence. That's what that's what that is, that's your reaction to that it's your lack of confidence and it's your jealousy, and we're all we're all guilty. There's not one person out there that can't say there have not been jealous
of another woman. And I can guarantee you when you look at someone that you're jealous of, you instead of saying, full stop, they are beautiful, that's it, you'll say they're beautiful, but look how much work they've done. They're beautiful, but they've got a filter on. They're beautiful, but they're twenty two years old. Why do we feel the need to put the butt in. It's because we don't look like that and we're insecure about it. Yeah, and there's this
idea that like, by devaluing someone, it elevates yourself. I mean, guys, I did it this morning. So please don't think that this is at all a rent where we're saying women are shit and like we need to be better.
Like, oh no, we're both guilty of it.
And I think it's just something that we were so we became I'm aware of and I was like, why do I have these thoughts from time to time? And obviously I'm not someone who's going to go and write it on social media, like, that's a whole nother ballgame, but I think that they all stem from the same thing, and so being really aware of your thoughts is something that we think is super important and you know, questioning why you think something. I literally did it this morning.
Matt and I were laying in bed and the same thing. We were looking through Instagram and Chrissy Tagan, who I love, like, I absolutely love following her. She's, you know, an awesome mum's spiration. She's very funny and I get a lot out of following her social media. She posted some photos and I was watching her stories and that was like, gosh, Christy Tagan's really beautiful. And I was like, yeah, but she's had a lot of work done. Look at how
much feeler she has. And I stopped myself. I said it, and I was like, whoa, Okay, I'm doing it. I'm so grateful for this podcast topic that we're about to do. I was like, do you know what, babe, I was like, I take that back. I have no idea if she's had feeler or not. This is me projecting my own insecurity.
She's just beautiful. I was like, she's fucking hot.
And I wish I looked that hot, and that recognition, I think is something that we can all sit in a little bit and it feels uncomfortable. And there's definitely going to be people who are hello of a lot better and a hell of a lot mature about it than others, and they are a lot more comfortable in their own skin. But I guess for me, it's really highlighted that I do have insecurities around the way I look, and obviously like being in the public world has not
helped that. Like, you know, feeling like sometimes my appearance is up for public conversation has definitely fed into my own insecurities. But I'm now recognizing how it's very unhelpful to project that onto somebody else. It doesn't do anything to elevate me or make me seem better. It's just a bit bitchy.
What I found interesting.
So the reason I really wanted to do this is a it was really highlighted to me in what's happening in the world right now in terms of The Bachelor, it's just like thrown in our face. There's all this online trolling, bullying, it's physically happening on the Bachelor. I just found it really interesting. But when when I started to delve into it, I just found the studies that I was reading really really interesting, and that's why I
really wanted to share them and highlight them. And there's this queen Bee syndrome that I stumbled upon from the University of Arizona. There's a professor there called Alison Gabriel, and she says that this queen Bee syndrome is real. It is a phenomenon, and it's about powerful women being disliked more than normal women. And this is because they display non stereotypical traits, so it's because they're taking men's roles.
So it's about women in powerful positions. I think that there is a sense of jealousy if there's someone in your life that's doing really well, or if there's someone that's telling you what to do, or someone another woman in your workplace got a promotion.
Now, when I was reading this, there's this really interesting study.
Talk about it is there was this female professor and she thought, I'm just going to run an experiment. She had two completely different, like two completely separate classes. She was giving the exact same information. She was talking to them exactly the same way, all via emails. This was their communication. All the emails were the same, but one would go out and she was the female professor, and then she would change her name to a male's name and send it out to the other group as a
male professor. Now everything she did was the same, her language was the same, the content was the same, and the figureback that she got was actually quite negative from all the females and her being a female professor. So people, even though she was giving the same content, people seem to gravitate and like the male professor more even though
he was giving the same content. And that made me really think there must be some subconscious there, some subconscious thought that we just don't want to accept and respect that there's a woman that could possibly be in power and be highly intelligent and be teaching or something.
It was just so interesting, But I think it.
Also plays into this idea of like women are held to a much higher standard than men. If we behave in a way that's like emotional or heightened, where labeled as neurotic or crazy. You know, you see it in politics all the time, where you see men yelling and screaming, and you know, even recently one of like one of the Australian politicians was swearing in parliament. If a woman was to behave like that, she would be labeled as
just that shit ass crazy. But men can behave like that, whereas women have to like, behave in a way that's like that is assertive, without being viewed as aggressive or without being viewed as bitchy. I do think that there is a very different standard for which we are held to, and so I think that that bias also plays into account here as well. There was another research study that
I found that was so interesting. This really played into my own internal dialogue around this whole conversation, and that was in twenty thirteen. There was a study that was brought out by the University of Ottawa. This study has been revisited bazillions of times in media and also when referencing this type of behavior. So the professor's name was Stracive Verlaine Court, and she shows that women a program to sometimes act aggressively or even bitually towards women who
are perceived as sexier. So the way that they actually rolled out this study is that they had eighty six different Canadian women as a subject group, and basically they had this woman walk in who was dressed very understated in car keys in like jumper, like, nothing about her was overtly sexualized or even overtly noticeable, and nobody commented on her, nobody even realized that she was in the
room as one of the participants. Then they had the exact same woman come back on the second day, but this time she was dressed in a very very sexualized outfit, you know, a short skirt, she had her cleavage out, and ninety seven percent of the women who were present in that case study wrote and like commented something that
was negative about that person. They had to write about the different people who are in the room, and ninety seven percent of them had had noticed her and been very negative about what she was wearing and who she was as a person, without actually ever speaking to her or knowing anything about her. And in this case, study has been held up as an example of sort of this internalized sexism that we have towards other women and how we can see very sexualized women as a threat,
and this does then translate into the media. This does then translate into social media as well. And I think the really important thing to kind of take away from this as well in this conversation is like, we don't want this conversation to turn into a blame shifting thing, Like we absolutely recognize that, like it's something that we can all be guilty of from time to time. But this is not like women are shit, women are bitches, because I don't want to play into that gender stereotype.
I really because we're women too, absolutely, oh my god, totally, and we are all about women supporting women.
We have the most incredible Facebook community through life on Cut where we see the empowerment that comes when people
support each other. I actually really hate this conversation around saying that women can be bitchy to each other and acknowledging it because I think it plays into the gender stereotype that women are irrational, women a bitchier, women are highly emotional, and I think the more that we give power to that narrative the more that people, the more that it sort of oppresses us from being able to have those really high powered jobs and progress towards equality.
So I do think that there is like the antithesis of this conversation. However, the really interesting thing I took away from that study, of the Canadian study was the Professor Tracy Velaine Court had said, you know, there are stereotypes and then there are things that are actually true, and there are things that hold women back from progressing. And one of those things that holds us back is actually our own psyche and the way that we treat
other women. Because if we're out there calling women sluts or saying you know, derogative things on social media or wherever else amongst our friends, amongst our workplace, then it also allows men to use that language, and it gives them permission to treat women in the same way or to you know, have our value based in the way
we look. So it was more a conversation around being like super conscious of your thoughts and like where that internalized feeling of like I don't like that person, but not really knowing why where that actually comes from, so that we can monitor ourselves and be more self censoring. And then that, you know, allows us to take steps towards going, oh, that lady is beautiful and I don't
need to put the butt in there. Just going back as well, just going back quickly to this idea that like we do hold women to a different standard that we hold men. There's something that's happened really recently in the media, and I think it's something that's really interesting, and that is the conversation around Chris Evans and his dick pic.
Do we all know what.
I've seen that do pic? Of course, the whole world has seen that. It went viral within an hour.
So if you don't know what we're talking about, Chris Evans, who is super hot, but yes, also he accidentally, he accidentally posted a photo of his erect.
Penis on his Instagram Instagram story. I just want to quickly interrupt because it was either an accident or very very very clever publicity move.
The way he's come out and spoken about it has been that it was not something that he wanted to share. Okay, continue, So he accidentally dick picked us all, like you know, an unsolicited dig pic on Instagram is pretty aggressive. But what happened was is he posted a video. He posted a picture of his camera roll, and one of the pictures in the camera roll was of his erect piece.
See if that's not the best accidentally filtered with ever? Thank you, Chris Evans.
The thing that's been really interesting about the reaction to this is that all of Chris's followers and fans have really rushed to his support, and it's been this incredible, this incredible show of like, you know, he didn't want to do that. We don't want his dick pic being flooding the internet. So they have been flooding the Internet with pictures of him to try and suppress the dick pic. So it's going further and further down Google, so making
it harder and harder for people to fight. Now, this is exactly how we should behaving when somebody's nude photos, al most vulnerable pictures get displayed on the internet. However, looking back, when the exact same thing happened to Jennifer Lawrence, however, it happened completely against her control. Her photos were hacked and then super intimate photos of her were released onto
the Internet. There wasn't this outpouring of support where people were trying to flood the Internet and stop people from finding the nudes. If anything, people were looking up the nudes and trying to find them. And she got so much hate and abuse and like hideous messages calling her a slut, calling her all different things under the sun.
I remember how big a story this was, and there's this conversation around is it just changing because this was pre the Me too movement, and you know, maybe things have started to shift and maybe we are becoming really cognizant of the importance of consent and how we should treat people when their privacy is exposed. Or is it a reflection that we do hold men and women up to slightly different standards.
I think it's a bit of a and bit to b. I think we're definitely coming a long way. We are recognizing way more our place in society, equality, how we should treat each other one hundred percent. There is definitely that movement which is brilliant, but there's.
No way we're there yet.
It's still definitely the second men show any sort of vulnerability, we praise them. The second women show vulnerability, it's usually like, oh, she's a bit unhinged or you know. So there's there's still a bit of a and bit to b. Hopefully we continue to move forward and get to a point where we start to protect the women.
Too when they've been leaked, for example. But this is such an interesting chat.
Yeah, and I think that it is progressive. Like you said, I do think that the times are changing, and I think that the more we have these conversations, the more that we're aware of our internal thoughts, the more that we're taking steps towards that level of like equality across
the board. And just to bring it back to Bachelor for two seconds before we wrap this bad boy up, obviously, like this season has been really weird, and I would I'm kind of actually a bit off it to be totally honest and transparent, because I think that by this point in the in the reality TV journey, they've stopped focusing on the drama between the girls and they start
focusing on the love story. But I feel like this season it's just all been this cattiness and the bitchiness between Irena and Bella, and that's been like the real conversation that has absolutely masked everything that you know, people want to watch The Bachelor for, which is like the potential of a really beautiful love story. And I just
think it's really disappointing. I mean, I think there's been behavior that's been on the show there's disappointing, but I also think that the focus on women tearing each other down, especially off the back of Paradise bit, where we're like the the most amazing thing that we took from that series was women supporting women and how empowering that was.
I just think it's taken a few step backwards with this season.
Yeah, And look, one of the things that I'm really I'm actually really proud of and I wish sort of made more of an impact now and I thought it would have, is that you only have to look at my season The Bachelor and my finale to look at the fact that it doesn't have to be a competition. Women can support women and go all the way to
the end. Sophie and I we obviously were at the end together, and before we knew that Nick wasn't going to pick anyone, we still were so genuinely happy if it was going to be one of us for the other person, Obviously we would be really upset because we both wanted it to be asked. But there was never, ever, ever, any mean behavior between us, anything negative said to each other about each other, to producers, to anyone else. There's
no bitchiness the whole season. And then even at the end, the whole premise of that finale was like women supporting women, we still wanted to go and help each other. We still wanted to go make sure each other okay. And I think that this is just a prime example of the fact that you don't have to be in competition with someone. It's women go further in life when you're
supporting each other. And it's actually statistically proven that women have a smaller supportive group around them go further in life and are more successful. This I literally read this this morning. I'm actually really lucky. I do have a really small group of friends, Like I can probably count them on one hand, to be honest, but all of them are so supportive of everything I do, and I genuinely feel like that's what gives me the balls to
keep trying things and to keep pushing myself. And there's never been jealousy. There's never been anything. And I'm like that with my friends, like I'll always put them first
and I'll always celebrate their wins. And I think that when I think of like what we wanted from this conversation, I think it's just to a recognize that we're all guilty of this behavior, of this type of jealousy and maybe even just gossiping innocent gossip that you think is innocent can really perpetuate into something that's a lot bigger and can really hurt someone's feelings, like words are so
so powder. So I think what we wanted to get from it was just a check yourself, check your friends, recognize the conversations you're having, and just think about why you're having them.
And also, just to add one last thing before we fully wrap up, I think also be really really aware and critical of the shit that you're reading, because I do think that the media plays a huge role in pitting women against each other. You know, they can take a certain line, they can take a photo of a certain point in time, they can really fabricate this pitting women against each other. And an example like I have from my own personal experience is the constant pitting of
Georgia Love and myself against each other. We barely know each other and we have nothing negative to say about each other. We don't dislike each other, we don't know each other, so like why would we? But from the very day dot of when I was on the Bachelor, the media has constantly compared us. They've said, you know, Laura Burns a Georgia Love two point zero. They've said, you know, like that, we have been having TIFs. It's
just been this absolute fallacy. And one of the things that happened most recently that really really upset me actually because I was like, this is just such bullshit, and you know, the media can really make a story out of anything. We were at Melbourne Cup Races and Georgia was interviewing for Channel ten and so part of the was a photo on the wall and then we went and had an interview. But it was such an awesome chat, like we talked about how we were both engaged, and we were like, you.
Know, look at your ring you Oh, what's your dress gonna be like?
And it was just a really like lovely, supportive conversation and I walked away from it going like, oh, that was so nice. Like I was really nervous about chatting to her because I was like, I don't know how this is going to go because the media always ends up writing something so negative. And it was awesome and
I had such a nice day. And then the next day there was several articles online and it was a photo, a quick one second photo that was taken out of a whole conversation where we both didn't look like we were enjoying ourselves. We both looked a little bit disinterested or disgruntled, and it was just one second in time, and then an entire article had been written about how we hate each other and how we are in competition and how you know you're jealous of each other because
you know, she dated Matt, who fucking cares like. It was just so fabricated, and it made me really really aware of just how much can be written in the media that's not true, and how far they can go to perpetuate this idea that women are always in competition with each other. So this is just my personal story on this. So and I'm saying this because I think, you know, we really need to be critical of the stuff that we're reading and not take everything on face value.
Yeah, for all of you non BATCHI people and all of our lovely overseas listeners. Just like a quick little recap. Georgia love who Laura's talking about. She was bachelorette, Matt was the runner up on So he got rejected and, like in Inverted Cooms, heartbroken.
I don't know if he was. I think he was. He was, Yeah, he totally was, said Yeah.
Then the next year Matt became the Bachelor, and then that's when Laura won. So this is why the media pit Laura and Georgia against each other because it was like, oh, Matt was heartbroken and he still loves Georgia and that was the thing that they wanted to play on when it just was completely fabricated. But the issue is we're still at this place. The reason they write these articles is because we're still in this place where no one
wants to say. No one was to see article that says Laura and Georgia had a great conversation, like they don't want to read it. They want to be like, oh my god, there are at each other's throats, because that's what we still that's the clickbait, and that's what we're still clicking on one hundred percent. And it just fucking sucked because it was such a wholesome chat that I walked away from it feeling like so devastated that once again this idea was just perpetuated.
I was like, we're never going to escape that narrative. We're never going to because that's what is being pushed by media. So that was like a weird way to wrap this up. But I think that all these things really like, I think all these things really interrelate, like social media, the media, our internalized thoughts, the conversations we had with our friends. They all stem from the same
conversation and the same thing. So, like we said, I mean, really just to kind of put a bow on this and wrap it all up nicely, it comes down to us as women to self censor the things that we're saying and the things that we're doing. And this whole idea of like two wrongs don't make a right and
an eye for an eye makes everyone blind. Just being like all the women and men on the Life on Cut podcast group, because if you haven't enjoyed the Life on Cut podcast group, honestly, it is one of the only podcast groups that I've ever been a part of where people are so incredibly supportive, uplifting, and I'm just such a big fan.
Get on there, you're a fan of your own podcast group.
I'm also a lot of a biased No, it is true, we're super lucky to have that community.
And that's what we're saying.
We don't want to be on this rand that like women suck because they don't, You're all amazing. We just wanted to we think it's an interesting conversation. We wanted to highlight it because it's happening in front of our eyes in the media, we're seeing it online.
And we just thought it was an important conversation because.
Literally, the only way we're going to progress is to physically mentally make these improvements now ourselves, and you can only do that by checking yourself and your friends too. Like even some of my friends sometimes they'll say something since I've had since I've been researching this, they'll say something there's like innocent, but like, oh my god, you see what she wore, And I'm like, well, hang on, chios really great.
Like I'm trying to.
Even say what I'm trying to even stop myself from getting into that conversation because I think that's really really important, and my friends are all getting on board with it. Everyone in my life is starting to be really positive, and I think that once we all get on this movement, this is how we're going to.
Evolve as a generation. Boom.
That's a wrap.
Okay, guys.
You know that we never finish an episode without our suck and our sweet and that means that this is our highlight and our low light of the week. Brittany, you can kick it off. What was your suck?
Baby?
I need to say that because you're thinking of what yours see I know miner okay, oh have a funny one that's not funny, but myself. Way to really preemd it why suck is that whilst Laura and I were away, we got our Facebook memories that works. Like Laura's was like happy three year anniversary to you and Mad and then mine came up and it was like happy two
year anniversary to you and Nick. And it was like disaster because it's like a photo of me walking away from Nick being heartbroken, and I just thought that was Whilst I'm saying it's my suck, it was actually so funny. That's like the biggest dickhead Facebook memory that there is.
Like, I mean, most people when you.
Go through a breakup, they usual Facebook just deletes everything from your life, like you know, it's like they don't exist, like you know, you don't even get a friend notification nothing. They're just gone into the nethera of the social media world. But then like for you, each year you get like, hey on this day two years ago, you got dumbed publicly, Hey on miss day, three years ago, you had your heart smashed into a thousand fucking pieces.
It's just cruel. A line. You can laugh about it, but it's cruel.
Oh and this is the great thing like a year ago wouldn't have last, would have been like ouch. Now I'm in hysterics also because one of the memes that I keep seeing that pops up is just like me in the dress walking away and there's just someone's written on it and said, at least she got to wear a wedding dress. And I was like, fair, like, mate, you well played. I did well in saying that.
On the exact same day as you had your two year anniversary, Matt and I had our three year anniversary, which is really startling because we really didn't take things slow, did we. Why maybe she was about to pop out a hot lap to the finish line.
I know, we're like, we're gonna get married one day. Guys.
We're just trying to do things in the most unconventional way possible.
And you and I just keep being really really contrasted in our life, don't we Like it?
Just really like I just couldn't be at a more opposite point in my life. Well, like what's gonna be good for the podcast. Let's do something really polar opposite, britt you stay single, and I'm just going to keep pro creating at the same time each year, I'll have to keep looking after them Arnie Brittany duty.
My sweet would literally just be that I did get to go up to Byron Bay.
I had a great time with my friends. The weather was really great.
I didn't serve as much as I wanted to because there was a shark, like a really big shark. But I we had like a semi week off. It was a working holiday, but I felt good.
So that's my sweet. So what's yours?
Oh?
Sorry, said again, So what's your suck? I suck my suck?
I don't remember. I swear to God, you just said you knew it.
No, my suck is. My suck is at today. And I know I've been speaking about this for the last couple of weeks, but today is Marley's very first day of daycare. We started recording it this morning, and as we sat down to record, Matt took Marley to daycare, and then I got a phone call from him, which was that she got really upset and she cried a lot before he left, and I had wild, wild, wild amounts of anxiety and then I cried and I walked in.
And Laura sitting on the luande and she looks up at me. She's got tears in her eyes, and I look at her. I'm like, what's wrong, and she goes, Marlie went today. Yeah.
I'm like, that's okay, and she's fine.
Yes, it was. It was a lot, like I know, I've been talking about this last couple of weeks, but she's finally started one day a week. We're going to operate to two days next week, or we're gonna up it to two days soon. But I just wanted her to go and like run in there and play with the toys and stuff like she's done. We've done three different orientations because it's taking me that long to be
okay with actually taking her to day care. You know, most a lot of parents just go for one orientation, but we've done three now.
But Laura's I'm thirty three weeks.
I just sat with her there every day, and so every time we've gone in for orientation, she's just run in and played with the toys. And so to hear that today when we were leaving her. She was really clinging, like she understood what was going on, Like really breaks my heart.
So that is my suck.
As much as I know it's a necessity, it's just not something that I want to do, and I'm really struggling with it a little bit.
My sweet is that you have a free day.
I don't have to suck my stomach in anymore when I go for walks. I just let everything hang free.
No, my sweet is that I feel like I'm living more authentically, which sounds really wanky, but it's the truth.
I've found it really difficult over the last four months to keep that part of my life a secret, not because I want to be banging on about it all the time by any means, but because you know, it's been such a significant being pregnant, having miscarriages, having my fertility journey has played a massive role on my mental health and my happiness, and I guess not being able to talk about it at all has made me feel
a bit disconnected from myself. And so I'm really happy that now that's out in the open and I can, you know, say, hey, guys, the reason why I can't do this is because I'm dying of indigestion over here. All the reason I keep that thing into the microphone, that's why I have indigestion.
But you know, just small.
I know that sounds like pretty I guess like the intergestion thing sounds like a pretty insignificant thing, and it is. But on a big day to day picture, being pregnant really consumes a lot of your day, and it consumes a lot of your mental space. So keeping that private and not being able to speak about it at all has taken a bit of a toll. So I'm really happy that that's out in the open, and I'm really grateful for our community and everyone who's been super supportive.
And yeah, that's it, babies.
Oh yeah, So guys, just before we go into a little bit of housekeep thank you to every single person who's joined the Life Uncut podcast Facebook group. Also to everybody who's joined up on Instagram as well. Like we said, the Facebook group is just the most incredible community. To everybody who's been organizing meetups in your own states and
in your own areas, it is phenomenal. Please they keep sending us photos, keep letting us know when your meetups are and we can let you know the wider group know, and to everybody who has left a review so far, thank you so much. To everybody who hasn't left a review, this is your don't sit in the naughty corner or we would just love to know your feedback. We'd love to know the parts about the podcast that you love
and any recommendations that you have as well. Please hit us up with that, because you know you subscribing and you leaving reviews is the only way that we're able to grow and to be able to keep on spreading the good word.
Shann love because we love there cutting the company and the cutting the company, the cutter as the bay their way BA