Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait island of people's today.
This episode is recorded on Gadiger Land of the or Nation. Well, it's been an interesting start to the day, hasn't it just more interesting for some than others? No? No, no, I feel good. I feel cleansed, I feel clean, I feel ready and rearing.
Wait till everyone way you feel cleansed and ready.
Went to the toilet in Brittany's bathroom, and.
I don't think going to the toilet adequately describes what just happened in my boom.
I unleash the depths of.
You, unleash some serious fury. It's get to our office. It's like down wait are we recording this? This is is not interes Just in case. Our office is down a corridor and then around a bend from the bathroom, and.
I can still smell what happened in that. Brittany got incense out and started to like she's got the sage stage, she's cleansing the house like a demon in here.
I try and I thought something died. I was like, has a dead possum falling out of the roof, But it was just Laura burning my brother.
Well I feel better for it anyway.
Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life One Can't. I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and this is our Thursday episode. This is ask on Can't, where we answer all of your spicy, deep, dark and burning questions and we have we have some good ones. We have some real sexy ones today. I know we say that pretty often, but like, I really enjoyed unpacking these questions. You guys are all, well, you're I mean, you know what, May is masturbation month, so you're all getting spicy spicy.
That is actually a great little way to start the episode. It is fasturbation month.
What does that mean?
Seriously masturbated? Why is it masturbating?
Is it because it's their stats that like it's the month that people masturbate the most? Or is it just a month where we're like encouraging people to masturbate?
What the purpose? It's more about the alliteration and just having a month of sexual wellness where we all embrace and literally embrace our glitterists with our fingers.
Well. I think masturbation months should be every month. I think if people should limit masturbating to four weeks of a year, I agree.
And if you're here in Brittany Hockley's house, masturbation month is masturbation night every night. Every Everybody's not welcome.
Wow, that was coming out.
Everyone is bob.
Yes, everyone should masturbate all you.
You can have your own party for one at your own home, is what we're saying, or a party for however many you want to have and do it together, like you know, more makes it more fun.
Like Lauras said, we do have some spicy little questions coming.
Up, but before we do, I wanted to tell.
You something really funny that I saw that I think everybody needs to know about. Like this is a PSA.
This is a very.
Important public service announcement. There's a video that's gone viral on the TikTok on the INTERWEBSITEE.
If you need us to come up with some good content, you know where we're finding it these days. I just love it.
I'm not actually on TikTok in terms of like I don't post, but there is so much great content that comes out of TikTok.
I mean you might not be on it, but you're lurking in the back.
You always lourk because so much stuff goes down. But this is one girl that went viral and I just lost it. It was so funny and I think it's quite relatable. Obviously it is because it's been viewed over fourteen million times. Like this video has gone bunk, it's probably more by now, has anyone been experienced when you're hooking up with a guy.
Maybe it's one night stand, maybe it's a bit more longer term, but I feel like this happens usually when you're only just in the very early days with someone where you're getting frisky, you're about to have sex. Maybe you pull out a condom because you want him to wear a condom standard first, and he says, because you know I's coming, well, I think there are some one size fits all, but you can get sized condoms. So you pull out a condom and the guy says, oh,
that's too small, like I'm too big for that. That will her, you know, knowing that the woman doesn't really know what that's going to feel like so she can't argue the point.
Do they mean the whole thing is tight, like the whole elastic balloon is too tight, or do they mean like the rim, like the opening.
I think they mean it like it's like a you know, like a tant trapped in string. You know that you put turkey in s trapped in string and it gets too tight and it bulges out. I think when a guy says it's too tight, it's like the end circular bit that's tight and it cuts into them. That's what I think. Oh, just like, yeah, like impresses it like a sausage skin.
So I have a different impression of this because I've definitely dated a guy in the past who used to complain saying that condom was too tight. We all know what. He just didn't want to wear one, but he was saying that it was like the part at the base of the peanuts was too tight, like the elastic that's almost like the elastic band bit that keeps that it's secured. He was like, that is too tight for me.
Yeah, and I'm sure that, like, I'm sure that's a thing not I think ninety nine percent of the time I'm sorry, bro, but you're not that big, like the condom's going to fit you. We know, we know you're trying to pull the wall over our eyes. We know what you're trying to do. You don't want to wear the condom then?
And gen to be honest that he wasn't that big either was he was very moderately sized. So I was like, well, if you're having an issue with this, why has nobody else ever had an issue with this? Well? There is and I have even't told you this video yet. It's so see how relatable it is.
It's so funny on that before we get into the video, I have gone down a rabbit hole of penis data and it's actually way more interesting than you would think. But this World Data Info talks about the average penis sizes by country.
When you say you went through some data of penis size, now, was this through your own subjective research experience? Prettany are the woman that you are or was this that you actually did some googling?
Okay, no, this is definitely not research from myself, Laura. I have not had that much sex. But thank you for assuming that I have.
Subject study one. But I can do a subject study around the world.
Absolutely not No, But the data says that the average penis size is about thirteen centimeters when erect.
But the resort of thought, yeah, okay, look, I'm like mentally trying to map out. Everyone who's listening to this is now kind of like with their hands trying to figure out how big they think all the penises are that they've seen in their lifetime. I would say, yes, it's about fifteen centimeters. Is probably browling the sweet spot.
Well, the reason of this information, you're probably like Brittany, Wayne's this information crucial. This is crucial information. So thirteen centimeters to seventeen is the range. The reason this is critical is because the average condom size starts at seventeen centimeters. So the average condom size starts at the upper end of the average penis scale. Meaning there is no excuse for a guy to say I'm too big and I
can't fit the condom. Now there's this TikTok user that she experiences, Right, there's these guys guys like I can't possibly put that on. I'm so well in doubt that this will hurt.
It hurts. It's like having a tight torn Okay, why Paul Will's going to fall off.
The video is of her really slowly, and she even surprised herself. She starts to put the condom on her foot right to show that it can stretch her over the foot, and then she keeps on rolling it up and she's like wow, and the music is this the whole thing is amazing that she keeps rolling it up and up and up. Look, Laura, I'm going to show you the video.
Now. The condom stretches and it looks like she's with it.
Looks like she's wearing tis. The condom goes up above her knee like knee high boots.
She literally is wearing a knee high condom. That's how far it's stretched. I'm interested in knowing. Is this like an extra extra large condom? Is this is an average sized condom? She just went pixy average.
One off the shelf. She's like, this, Will, there's no thought in this. We just because she's like, I didn't know what it's gonna actually go so long. I just thought it would go over my foot. But she's like, next time someone tells you it's too big, showed them this video because it is absolutely not. And it is that excuse now does not fly, so Tory Mum told dadte dog toy friends.
Oh my god. Yeah. But also, are we still living in a time where like men and I know we are, I know we are. It's been a lot, I know we are, but it's been a long time since I've been in the dating game. But like the excuses that are made in order to get out of wearing condom like condoms these days, if you you know, if you choose to wear them, and that's that's ther vibe. They're so thin, they're so ergonomic. There's been so much not me well, like it's like you can feel all of
the sensations. Like the excuses are just so irrelevant now. I think ladies and gentlemen and friends, if you're out there and you're dating someone who's trying to, like, you know, swindle you out of using a condom, they're just a fucking jerk.
And I would also love to know off the back of this, if you have like a brilliant if you have heard a brilliant excuse, if you've been looking up with someone and they have given you an excuse that he's so fucking far fetched or funny as to why they can't put a condom on. I would love to hear that, so please send that in.
I once dated a guy who said he had a latex allergy, and I was like, be true, yes, could be.
But you'll never never I will never know you.
Like, where's your allergy bracelet?
I want to see that.
I want to see that shit on your wrist.
I want I want some proof. Does it get You're gonna get hives if you put this on? No? Look, I remember it was very early days and I was like, hey, look through in one to put on. And he was like, oh, sorry, I can't. I've got a late text allergy. And I was like, that wasn't said in the way that you would have said it. If you had a late text allergy.
How what can you do for that?
If it's just hives or something, can't you say can I test that? Can I put a bit on your arm or something? Not necessarily the willy, but if maybe you could just rub it on the arm to test to see what happens, because you're not gonna have an anaphylactic fit, surely.
I think it's just a rat. I think what I do is I ask him to wear it around as a kneehighoot for the day. All right, let's get into the questions for today and for everybody. I mean, we still get this question quite a lot. So if you guys don't know how to send us a question for USK Uncut and you want one for us to answer, or you've got something that's been plaguing your mind, all you have to do is jump onto at Life Uncut
podcast on Instagram. Send us a DM right at the top, ask Uncut and it will go into the mix for next week's questions. It's that simple.
Also make sure you hit follow, follow it.
Follow the Instagram. You can also follow Lady in Cat and Britney Hockey Britney Underscore Hockey while you're at it.
This is a short and sharp one kickstart just to get us going. How the heck do you tell someone to stop aggressively playing tongue hockey with you? That's it, that's the question. Oh, there's an AKA there, obviously a bad kisser.
There's nothing worse is there than when you you really like someone. The energy is so high, you're like, the chemistry is there, You're so ready for that first kiss, and then you kiss and you're like.
It's so bad because I might be on my own here, But kissing for me is probably like my favorite part of four play, Like I agree for me, if it's good and the chemistry's there, like that can do so much more. It really just either sets the tone or not. And if your eyes open in shock while you're kissing, there's something not going.
I was gonna say, when you say it's your favorite part of four play, I'm pretty sure it's the only four play we have. Now just kissed for two minutes, We're like, all right, get it on, roll over it in.
There's not even any tongue, you just like lips only.
I also think like a bad kiss can dictate how that connection then goes onto evolving. So for example, if you kiss someone for the first time and that kiss is beautiful and intense and like you feel connected, like that makes you like the person even more, that kind of really ignites that fire in you. And if the kiss is terrible, it can Yeah, it can set you in the opposite direction. The question being how do you manage how do you mitigate the situation when somebody is
trying to penetrate you with their tongue. That word should not be in that sentence, I do think you can say less tongue like, I think you can say that it's definitely never hard. Yeah, it's never going to be a comfortable situation. Do you know what I think you can do?
Though?
I think you can also sometimes actually like massage the person into kissing the way that you want to kiss by physically doing it. You know, difficult, but it's doable, use your tongue in the way that you want them to kiss you back. Because people often mirror other people's behavior, right, Like, often when you're talking to someone, they'll mirror your body language. Often when you're caressing someone in a certain way, they'll do something similar back to you because you're giving them
the indication of what you like by physically doing it. Now, I'm assuming and giving everyone the benefit of the doubt that they can read signals, and not everyone can. We know that, like, not everyone can pick up on the subtleties, and some people need to be verbally told what you do and don't like. So before you get like fully cash the ick and completely jumps walk away from the guy.
If the guy's great or the girl's great, whoever it is, I do think you could say let's try that again, but with a little bit less tongue or whoa buddy, like getting a bit excited there, or something that indicates that maybe you're not loving it.
Do you know I broke up with someone once because they're a bad kisser.
I believe it. I think heaps of people have broken up because they're dat to people who are back.
Yes, I was fourteen, but I still did it like it was my first experience. I was like, this can't be normal.
Well, but I mean, fourteen is different because the poor kid has had no experience. But you would think when you're in your twenties and your thirties, you've probably had some experience it. Kissing the only like I've definitely data guys or being on like you know, Tinder dates or early dates where the kissing was really bad and it turned me off wanting to continue the relationship because I was like, I cannot do this for the next things two years of my life.
I think it should be treated, and I agree with everything you said, Laura, but it's a hard conversation. It's I'm trying to think of how I would say. I don't wouldn't necessarily say let's try that again without with less time, Like I don't think that would be my approach.
Take two and action. I think that.
I would first of all, and this is very doable and lots of people do this. You can, like Laura said, you can coach them into what you want to do by doing it to them, so like pull back a bit, don't open your mouth so much so it's like, don't even let that in, Like you don't let you, don't give them an opening, keep those lips taught, no, but you do what you want to do, and hopefully, like any every second person should be able to pick up
your vibes and your energy. If you've tried this, if you tried to coach them in and it's just not landing, then yeah, you need to have the conversation because it doesn't everything else could be perfect. But you do have to enjoy kissing them because it's something that you need to do for the rest of your life. But I don't think they should be any different to we, and we're big advocates for this too. Sexual experiences in the bedroom.
If you want something in particular or you don't like something in particular, we always say.
Have the conversation.
Like everyone likes something different, you can be open about it. I think the same thing can happen, it's just how you're gonna actually say it to not hurt somebody's feelings.
Well, I think it's interesting that you find giving somebody kissing feedback difficult because we've had this conversation just recently in terms of like actual sexual feedback, like if someone's doing something in the bedroom that is not to your liking, you had said, oh, I have no problem with telling them like that's too rough or that's too hard, or you know, I don't like what you're doing there. So you feel more comfortable in giving someone feedback in terms
of sex. But you more comfortable doing that than what you would giving someone feedback about kissing.
Yes, I do, and I yeah, And I don't know why it's so interesting. Yeah, maybe because because maybe because I feel like people are more particular about what they like in the bedroom. But I find it easier one hundred percent to say that I like something different in the bedroom as opposed to kissing, because I feel like
people would take more offense to the kissing thing. I don't know, I feel like it's more of a sensitive topic because people usually think you know what, I think people, particularly guys, probably think that they question how good they are sometimes in the bedroom. I think that there's a lot of performance anxiety and a lot of pressure on men sometimes. But I think every man thinks he's a good kisser, Like it's questionable in the bedroom, but I
think every guy thinks he's a great kisser. So to hear that he's not, he's fuck.
Fuck.
I've been making out like this for fifteen years.
And I do also think it all comes back to this idea that, like, not everyone likes the same thing, and some people think that, you know, to show how much they like you, like a really passionate, big open mouth kiss with lots of tongue is what's going to make you realize that they're super into the relationship or whatever it is, you know, like they're just like super eager to impress you or please you. And maybe they've been in relationships with somebody who really enjoyed that style
of kissing. Like literally everyone likes things differently and there's no one shape fits all for anyone. So maybe someone in the past has really loved that type of kissing and it's just not what vibes with you. I'm still going back to like, if there's something that you don't like, you can say, let's look once again, let's try this with less tongue, or just like, well, you know, that's a bit too much tongue for me. I don't think you have to make a big deal about it, but
hopefully they can get those subtle hints. And if you have to have some more less subtle hints, i e. Saying it directly to them. If they haven't gotten that feedback, then maybe they're kissing style just doesn't match your kissing style. And that's a very possible thing, and you probably would just eventually get the egg.
Anyhow, good luck. Let's get into question number two.
All right, question number two. So I've been seeing this guy for a few months and everything is going pretty perfectly, although he recently said to me that I wear the same perfume Chloe by the way, I love Chloe as his ex girlfriend who he was with for six years. He super politely said to me that every time he smells my PERFC, it reminds him of his ex, and so he kindly suggested that he's happy to get a
different perfume I may like as a present. I can't decide if I'm a bit offended by this or if it was a fair request, as I also don't want him to be reminded of his ex every time he's with me. Would appreciate any advice as I'm in two worlds about how I feel about this now. Brian, I know you have a very clear cut thought on this one.
Yeah, Look I do for sure. I don't think that this has to be a big deal for you. And if I was putting myself in this position, yes, it sucks. If you'd really like a perfume right like it's what you've been wearing for a long time, it's your smell, you love it, that sucks. But if my partner had come to me and said, and you've said, he was so nice and polite about it. He just wanted to
let you know. If he came to me and said, you remind me of my ex when you wear that like that smell takes me back to a place I would I would be in the shower scrubbing myself right now, and then I would be changing my perfume for sure, because smells like pheromones and smells are so powerful and if you just think a smell. Can you can smell something that you haven't smelled in years?
Right?
You could walk past someone on the street and smell something and it will take you back to a memory, like we do attach memories and feelings to smells. I wouldn't want to know that every time I wear that that my partner is thinking of their ex. There are so many other perfumes out there, and obviously for him to bring it up, it's bothering him. If it didn't
bother him, he wouldn't have mentioned it. So the fact that he's like, look you are, you're reminding me of like I think of her when I smell you, and can I buy you something else? I think that he's done it really politely and he sounds like he's very genuine, very loving, he very into you. I would be at the shop right now getting any perfume if that was me.
I do think it's hard because I know how attached some people become to their sense, especially if you've been using a perfume for so many years, that perfume smell kind of becomes part of your identity. It becomes part of your morning ritual and your routine. And yeah, I do understand why you have an attachment to something that you love, and you also don't want to be like, oh, well, like your past and your ex is now taking away something that I love that's also part of my identity.
At the end of the day, I think the big one with this and like, I do agree with you with everything you just said, Britt, smell is not something that you have control over. You can't control the things that spark a memory. You can't control the smells that you associate with different times in your life. I mean, for me, chewing gum reminds me of my ex, and every time I smell chewing gum, that's just my that's
the memory that pops into my mind. And like, I'm never going to tell Matt not to eat chewing gum. But at the same time, it gives me like a moment where I'm like, oh, that's yeah, that's that memory that pops into my head. So I guess that the big part of this is like, you can't be offended that he's asked you not to wear it, but you do have the choice, and the choice is you can continue to do whatever the fuck you want to do
if you want to wear it. Every day, wear it every day, but know that he also doesn't have control over the firing of those memories. You know that he doesn't have control the fact that that they're the things that it brings up for him. And so you can make the decision as to what you feel comfortable with. If you're okay with him being sort of thrown back into thinking about his ex because that smell reminds him
of her, then keep wearing the perfume. Maybe in time the memory will be replaced by you, because you know, things do evolve and change in time. But I agree with you, Britt, I probably wouldn't want to be in a situation where I rocked into a room and I smell a certain way and then would have to worry about whether my now boyfriend, who I love and am like invested with, is then thinking about his ex girlfriend because of my smell. Totally, it's such an avoidable situation.
Well, just like.
Getting scientific for a second, but just in relation to what you just said, Laura about you know, maybe in time it'll be replaced. Scientists experts actually say that the memory associated with smells they do tend to be older, which means they've thought about less often, but when they are thought or triggered, they are very, very vivid. So, in fact, what you just said about maybe if we give it more time, the older the memory gets, the
more vivid it gets when it hits him. So I think just getting you perfume, I think, like the really easy option is don't be offended by what he said, because there is no offense meant at all. Yeah, ol factory, which is the sense of smell. Olfactory is the strongest of all of our senses connected to memory.
Go to David Jones and get yourself some Gucci Rush girlfriends and that's next there.
Yeah, ask him what his favorite is, like, go and pick it together, and pick something that he's loving, that you love as well, and that you know is going to be, you know, a different smell for you and create different memories.
So that's what I think.
What's your favorite perfume? What's one you wear?
I'm wearing Narsisco perfume at the moment. It's new for me, probably in the last six months. I've tried it and my sister Sherry bought it when she asked me to be her bride'smaid. She gave me like a little present with a card, and she gave me the perfume, and I'm really really loving it, and I have been. You know, I've worn the same perfumes for a very very long time. But it's one of my old perfumes that I used
to wear. My ex boyfriend gave it to me, like back back in the day, the crazy one, and I loved that perfume so much. But every time I even wore it, it took me back to that time, like myself. It wasn't it was just reminding myself of that time. So I ended up having to scrap that, which was sad because I loved it. I'd want it for so many years, but I hadn't thought of that until right now. That's how strong these smells are.
Yeah, I use like Dove deodorant. I can't remember the last time it was perfect.
Hey, you've used the air freshener before.
I've used feberees. I've got a really I'm really attached to my scent.
Actually, there's been so many times lower completion. She's like bye, driving Joden, and I kept forgetting to put it on. I'm like, yes, you could just got it.
All like hands. So whatever, whatever is it everything from when I'm feeling really hormonal, I'm like, God, I really should get it with putting dedor anyway, all right? Question number three, Okay.
Question number three, this is a more serious one. A couple of years ago, I had a breast reduction. Now, for those that don't know, breast reduction incisions look like a lollipop where they go all the way vertically down your and around your nipple. The surgery itself is pretty traumatic. I ended up with a nasty infection and really bad keiloid hypertrophic scarring, which means I have raised and wide scars that are really bad.
I cannot wear.
A top without patting the scars out because the scars show through. So if you guys don't know what keiloed scarring is, it is raised, bigger scars. It's just the way some people's bodies heal. So you can go and google that if you want to get an idea in your head. She says, I am now newly single and at a stage where I'm ready to date again. I do not know how to tackle dating with this deformity on my breast that I am mortified over. How do
I bring this up? When I start dating and to a future partner, do I tell them prior to being intimate with them and warn them I don't have casual sex, but a new boyfriend means sex eventually. So how in the world do I manage this? I hated reading this, Like, I got a lot of feels about this, and I really felt for her and I really want to change her mind into how she views herself and thinks about herself.
Well, I mean this is I guess, like the big part is you never have to tell someone if there's something that you're insecure about about your body, regardless of what that is, you don't have to give an explanation or like, And when I say give an explanation, I mean, like, there is nothing that you have to admit to someone about your body prior to having sex unless you want to because you feel like it's a safe and comfortable space.
Somebody who judges you for having scarring on your breast is not somebody who you should be spending any time or any energy in. And when you say, like you want to get back into dating or I guess, like you know you're not saying you want to have casual sex. Casual sex is probably different. You may come in contact with someone who might judge you that makes them a fuck with, right, But like, you don't have control over that.
If you're meeting new people all the time, if you're having new connections and you don't have like an emotional connection to them, then there may come a situation where someone may be outwardly judging. They probably won't actually say anything to you, they might just think it. But like, who fucking cares what that person thinks, because they're irrelevant
to your life. But in the instance which what you're saying is that you're getting into more long term dating, somebody who likes you and who cares about you is not going to care about scars on your breast in the exact same way that if you like a guy and you've started dating a guy and they had had open heart surgery, for example, or surgery on their chest, or they had a big scar on their arm, you wouldn't look at that and think, oh, God, like I can't date you because you've got a big scar on
your chest. I truly don't think that anybody else is going to think that of you. And I also think as well as like these are your own insecurities about something that's obviously been super traumatic for you, and that's also part of your identity. But I think like sometimes we can be our own worst critic, and that's not how other people view us one hundred percent.
And like everything you said, I wouldn't add anything to that. It's absolutely accurate. It's the old those that matter don't mind, and those that mind don't matter.
The people that at least bothers.
You don't want those people around anyway at the end of the day. This is definitely something that you obviously feel very self conscious about, but you shouldn't feel self conscious about it. And exactly what Laura just said, we're ourselves pick up things in our own body and our own situations and our own lives that nobody else even sees, Like no one else sees what we see about ourselves. And if you've met someone that is just frothing you and so into you, this is not going to be
an issue. If it makes you feel better, maybe you could just say tell them about your operation. Maybe say, oh, you know, I used to have huge breast, but I had a retroduction for you know, back pain or whatever. Maybe you can just talk about the fact that you had had an operation, if that makes you feel better and you want to get that out on the table.
But I don't think you should ever have to apologize for warn someone and you use the word worn, what are you warning them about, like about your beautiful body?
Yeah, about your beautiful body.
So please don't ever feel like you have to warn somebody that, Oh, just so you know, when you take my top off as a scar like And I.
Think this question is very relative to a lot of people, not just in terms of scarring, but I know that there are people who have different types of disabilities or different types of maybe something that isn't what we would expect to be quote unquote normal, and then they feel like they need to explain away something or they need to tell there is nobody is deserving of that explanation.
You know, nobody needs to be explained to as to how your body works or what is different about your body unless you feel comfortable and you want to do it. But there's nothing wrong with your body. It's just the
way that it works. It's just the way that it looks and everything that the spectrum of what is actually normal is like this infinite scale, right, And also on that as well, Like you having scars on your body makes no difference to the sexual experience that you're going to have if it's something that you had to then work around in terms of sex, Like if there was something that compromised the sexual experience that you were going to have, then I would say, yeah, maybe have a
common station before you get into the bedroom. So it's not a shock or it's not something that's going to come as a surprise and then you're going to feel judgment for it. But something that's on your body, I truly don't feel that anybody. I don't think that you're
going to be judged for that. I think that your fear around your own insecurities outweighs how other people will react to it, especially people and someone who you've been dating for a little while and someone who actually cares about you.
I think that the important thing to think of here is anything that you do or want to say, or want to tell the other person, do it for you. Don't do it for them because you think that you need to give them this pre warning. Do it for you because it's going to ease a situation for you, or ease your anxiety, or make you feel more comfortable. Every single decision should be for you, not for the
other person in this situation. I don't know if you guys remember about a little while back, we actually interviewed this amazing woman named Ellie and she's from the is She has the Instagram handle comfortable in My Skin and
also has a website called Flip through My Flaps. And the reason why she started Flip through My Flaps was to try and destigmatize the way that women view their body, to show women these like hundreds, if not thousands, of different volvers, so that women could flick through and go, oh, my vulver is normal, the way my labia looks is normal, And to try and destigmatize women who have been thinking maybe that they need labiaplasty or whatever it is, cosmetic
surgery to improve the LaBier because we've been conditioned to
think that the female body should look a certain way. Now, Ellie also has the same concept, but for breasts, and now I think it could be really great for you or for anybody listening to this, if you feel self conscious about your breast or about your vulver, to go and have a look at a normal female gallery of how fucking different everybody's breast look and let me tell you, I think we've been conditioned on Instagram to see beautiful,
perky breast. So many people have breast implants, which there's nothing wrong with, but I think we've forgotten what normal breasts look like and what a normal vulver looks like. There are so many different types of breaths in the world, and yes, sure some of them have scarring, some of them are saggy, some of them nipples look down, some of the nipples look up, some of the nipples are inverted, they look left, they look right.
It's all different. And I think when you actually look around and you start to appreciate those differences and maybe really go and do a deep dive on this gallery, it can make you less self critical. And I know for myself it made me less self critical, especially with how much my breasts have changed since breastfeeding. They're completely These are not my boobs. These are someone else's boobs. If you told me my boobs were going to look like this two years ago, I would have said, I
don't even know what you're talking about. But now they're like sad little pancakes. And you know what I love these sad little pancakes because they've done their purpose. You know, they mean something different to me now. And three years ago, if you told me that this is what my breasts were going to look like, I would have been shocked
and probably horrified. But now I'm so much more comfortable, and I really did like I went and did a deep dive on the side as well, and I saw like just it made me so less self critical, and I think that that's probably the place where I'd say to start, well for.
Anyone that does want to have a look. It's comfortable in my skin, and she has flipped through my flaps like it's like an album on there. But on the same website she has brows from my boobs, so she has all the boobs on there. I'm looking at them now. There is literally everything from missectomis to like Laura said, all different shapes to piercings, to scars to stretch marks to you know, everything you can imagine. And I'm scrolling
it now. There's hundreds of boobs and it really does make you be like wow, there is literally nothing and no one that is normal. Normal doesn't exist because there's no such thing as normal. Everyone is different, everyone is beautiful, and I think, like Laura said, it made her feel better, it makes me feel better too. I think everyone should
go onto this website. If you didn't listen to that episode too, just just go back and have a browse through that because it was a really great eye opening episode.
Yeah, and I guess, like the last thing I want to add to this is like nor when we say it makes you feel better, it's not because you're comparing down and you're comparing to somebody else who's got worse boobs or better boobs or whatever. It's not about the comparison. It's about the inclusivity. It's actually about looking at how fucking different everyone is and being like, cool, it's okay
that I'm also different. I think that that's the real take home message from it, and knowing that what you see on Instagram is absolutely not the normal so all, and I think that that is it from us today, guys, A short, shut, quick down, dirty, easy little You know, I don't even know where I'm going with this, ask gunkat, but if you have a question for us you want us to answer for next week's episode, slide on into the DMS, like I said, it's at Life Uncut podcast
on Instagram and that will go in the mix for next week. Or if you want to send us a voicemail message, you can also voice record on Instagram as well, and then we can use those ones on the radio show.
And don't forget it's Tony mum'say dad kay dot ta. Friends and share the love because we love love