Ask Uncut - Sis, is this your man?

a thousand times. She's done it. She's doing a lot of kicking at the moment. Do you know that I went to a bar class last night and I thought of Laura. I was like, oh, that's nice, very romantic. Do you know bar like the mix between pilates and ballet? And then I went to a bar last night. I was drowning my sorrows and I was thinking about Laura. I haven't seen her in a while. I went to one of those ballet ballads kind of glasses, and now my butt is so sore. I feel like you could

bounce coins off of it. Okay, is this an age thing? Because I also went to the gym and I cannot move? Is it because we're getting older? I don't know what it is. I thought I was. I always thought I was like relatively feared or healthy. But every part of my body is sore. I can't cough, I can't laugh. And it was just one gym class. Well, this is what Laura's been saying. I mean, she's been training for a couple of weeks now, but she's like three months.

I think I'm so sorely, you know those it's the little muscles that you don't use all the time. Like for me, it's not the quds, it's the tiny ones in rain, like one of the glutes. Joking anyway, very sore. And I think that you know we're channeling some Laurer energy. Well I think mine was, And like I think I've been downplaying it. I've been so horrifically ill for weeks and I've managed to I think pretend I haven't been,

but I have been. I was so so unwell and just as I thought I got better, I got sick again. So two nights ago, so I on, and how are you telling me this? Like as I know that you're telling the podcast family that you've been very unwell, but I am probably the most whip. Oh yeah, Kisha had to come over and save me and bring me drugs and take Delilah because I couldn't look after I was just yeah, it was bad anyway, This made me think

of something funny. So two nights ago, I've been getting this vertigo and getting really dizzy and unwell, which is very unusual. This is not something that's ever happened, but like waking up dizzy with the world spinning and then vomiting, very very unusual. So I don't know if it's something to do with virus I had, or hopefully it's not something new that I've been getting happy with, something like many airs or something. It's quite serious but not funny.

I felt hungover, and I was like, I need to eat something. I felt so unwell for so long.

I'm interjecting you. When I was texting you being like hey, I'll come and get Delilah, but you know, I'll stop in at the pharmacy and get you some stuff on the way, Like what do you need. We were going through it all, there were group chats, it was all happening, and then she sends me your message. But you're like, oh, also if you could get some hot chips. I was like, it's nine o'clock in the morning. I don't even know where I would get hot chips, and I don't know

if you're being serious. Yeah, I was serious because I've been vomiting for so long, and I was like, I just wanted some greasy hot chips anyway. I was like, you gotta get uber eats of those, mate, I'm not going to the hot chip store at nine o'clock on a Saturday morning. I don't think it's anything open at nine o'clock. But Lucky didn't because I continued to vomit all day. So it's good that I didn't get hot

chips at nine o'clock in the morning. So I'm like, yes, I'm going to order my food now, I'm gonna get back on track. And I'm so hungry, I'm so greasy and I'm still hungover, So I get on to Uber Eats and I get very excited and I order chicken snitzel. I'm like, great, But every time I order it, I click into the picture and I'm like to look at it because you know, you need to eventually start salivy. So I clicked onto it and I was like, oh,

I'm getting that snitzel. It's so big. Then I keeps growing. I was like, oh, you know, I'm adding chips, so I added hot chips. I was like, and I'm addening those two hash browns. Hash Browns. Better get a coke as well. Got a coke. Then I was like, oh, but I have to hydrate. Gonna get a poweraide out of the power raiding. Then I was like, last minute, Oh, it looks a bit dry out of tubble gravy in yeah, so light order. It's just me last minute. I added the gravy in okay, and I'm glad I did because

it's very dry chicken sizzle anyway. Also, you know you've been vomiting for a while, so your throats are like the gravy is a great addition.

I had ordered was a tub of gravy. So all I got. Fucking all I ordered was a tub of gravy. That's it. That was my order. No wonder it took two minutes. They're like, this freak just wanted a table gravy. Sure, So that's why I was living. Hang on a second, with the delivery fee and the service fee. Yeah, I take twenty eight dollars for my What I had done is because I was so sick. I'd gone in and I was just looking at the food pictures, but I was shopped shopped. I didn't add anything to the card.

I was like, Oh, that's a good sizzel, and then I just clicked out of it and I was like, oh, I'm good chips. I didn't add anything. The only thing I was like, was like, added the leader tubber gravy. So that was my BI. I don't feel as bad about not getting you hot chips anymore because get fierce. Anyway, that's my story of the week. Did you have the gravy on anything that did you just drank it from the I ordered the meal I did, and the same driver came. It was the same man, and I was like,

don't ask me. Also, just drop it at the doors. When you just see me right now, I look like golumn coming out of Okay, depends how The gravy wasn't enough, so I did order the stizel. I have a friend that drinks gravy by itself. That doesn't surprise me. Gravy is delicious. It is good, Yeah, but I don't even know what it is. What's a lot of stock and flower? I also don't know what stock is, like it's salty, no ground up chicken? Do we know what? Any I

don't know. I know this is very off track, but I just I constantly fire myself in these moments where I'm like, nearly thirty, don't know what a very common ingredient is. Yeah, I don't know. Let's mythbust that next week? What else? What have you got to bring to the table? Should I a Kasha? I want to ask you about a Facebook group that I don't even know how I became a part of this Facebook group because I think someone I know, actually I know exactly who I know.

It was one of my neighbors from when I was this is like my childhood home. One of my next one neighbors somehow added me to this Facebook group and then I became a part of the group. And I don't actually remember hitting ad but anyway, I'm a part of this Facebook group now and I don't know how I feel about it morally, And you're gonna tell us what the group is. There's like there's two sides of this coin, and I really don't know where I land.

So the Facebook group is called SIS. Is this your man? Like sis? Sis? Yeah, like this is your man sisterhoods? Yeah? Help out? Yeah, sisters help me out? Yeah. Okay, So basically the premise of the Facebook group, I'm assuming that there's quite a lot of these, and they're based off of like the low location, because I think this one is I'm from Newcastle originally, and so I think this one's like Newcastle and the Hunter because all of the posts in there are from people like around that area.

And I could be a bit late to the party on this, but I think the idea is that people who are online dating like bumble, Tinder, Hinge, whatever, all these other apps, they might start talking to someone and before going on a date with them, or maybe they've been dating them for a little while, they'll screenshot the profile or put up a picture of these guys and they'll be like, hey, I want a reference check on this person. Oh okay, And so like the communal FBI,

it's like a car crash. I can't look away. I can't look away because I'm like, you are late to the party on this, I will say, am I Yeah.

So I've seen the positive side of it, and I've seen the other side of it, where it's like I dated this guy for three months and I found out he was also dating six other people. He was a really bad person. I started to see these red flags of coercive control or like pretty full on things, and so in a way, I'm like, Okay, well that person's just saved their time. I've seen a lot of people be like, wow, I'm so glad I posted this because there is no way that I'm replying to this person now,

but they don't know whether it's a bit. See, I don't like him, Murky. I don't like it. And the reason I don't like it is I understand that, like you do want this sort of sisterhood of helping people out. And of course, there are plenty of shitty people in the world, but there are plenty of good people in the world. And there are still plenty of shitty people in the world that were shitty, but I'm not shitty anymore. And what I mean by that is, like, there are

plenty of people And Laura has said it before. She's openly admitted that she has cheated in her very young early days, you know, Like I'm talking like teenagers in early twenties. But there are lots of people that have done the wrong thing in a relationship when they're younger. They're not that person anymore. And I do think at that point a leopard can change its spots. And I just worry that it's a place where people don't get a chance to change and be something different. And I

don't know. I'm very optimistic and I love, you know, I love to give people the benefit of doubt and twenty five thousand chances, Like, I'm really bad for that, but I just don't like the idea of there being a public space where people can go and post someone's photo and talk shit about them. At the end of

the day, I think it's a form of bullying. But I think if someone fucked up once in relationship, if they ghosted you online, I don't think someone ghosting you and dropping off the face of the planet is reason to go and post them in a Facebook group so that a bunch of people can hate on them. See, I don't know, you're running this ring, aren't you.

I would. I would comment and I'd be like, Hey, I just want to save you the drama and the trauma that I went through with this person. I hope he's changed, but what if he has changed. That's up point. Whether she wants to take the information that I've given she is asked for it. It's different to just like message that the message you directly you joined a group trawling hoping that your ex gets posted in there so

that you can comment. No, I'm not saying you, but I'm saying in that situation that I happened, I think I would. I think there's like a little bit of camaraderie there. I think there's a little bit of like, I want to have your back because I don't want you to go through what I went through. But I

do see that this is what I mean. I really am treading the line whether I'm for these or I'm not, because I think that they can be very problematic, But I also think that there's something to like, you know, maybe these guys will stop acting like dickheads if they keep on getting called out publicly. Nah, I don't know, you're gonna remember that once something's on the internet's on

there forever, Like it's literally on there forever. And I think that, imagine if someone did that to you, no one could do that to me because I haven't treated someone badly.

I talk? Speaking of poles, we did a poll on if you can put a photo of yourself and your partner up in your house and guess what bitches you can guess who's in the right met However, I can do a follow up pole because we've got a lot of messages from people saying does this include wedding pictures? Also? Does it include a collage where there's like many photos of other things as well? And I would just like to point out that yours is neither of those things.

Yours A three. Are you just trying to rub in that I'm not getting married? I know that I know I'm not. Man, I'm just trying to point out that it was an odd choice. Okay, so here we go. My three photos that I have.

she's recently no style. She knows what looks good and she just merely pointed out it was an odd choice. I think we need a photo of the wall so that people can actually decide whether this is a go or not, because she doesn't really matter anyway, It is not odd. You just wait, missus newly in love? You've been in love a week? You wait. You are putting a photo up on a consent. You are doing a collage wall. So are you trying to say, because so,

I've got these three photos right? Nothing else on the wall? Very defensive? Are your extremely Are you trying to say you and the audience? Are you trying to say that if I had a few different photos surrounding it, it would be okay? Yeah, whack some photos of Delilah up there. I would personally Delilah. I had some photos a sherry, mix it up a little. Why does that change the fact? Why? It just makes it a little less weird? And I don't know why I don't I'm weird. I don't know

the psychology behind it. Okay, it's feeling within my body, deep internalized trauma. Here, I'm thinking, in secure. Why don't you have photos of me on your wall? I see you more than anyone in my entire life. Exactly. That's why I think I would make the wall. I don't need you plaster on my wall because I see you every day. If I'm not seeing you, I'm speaking to you.

going until I get the results. I want confirmation bias. I actually got a few dms personally, and they were all positive. They're all like stuff everyone else. Brittany, you do you you put a bigger picture up of your I was like, yes, Queenn, that's fun because I know they're really messaging me this because you also have photos of you and your partner on your wall. It does look a semi shriny, but it's candles and flowers underneath you know what Ben's coming. Guys. He's coming in only

two weeks now. I'm very excited. But I will see what he thinks when he gets here, and if he thinks it's weird, I'll like a couple of photos. There's something I need to tell you about this. And this is a very internalized tangent, so I apologize. But it's quite funny. The boy that I've started dating admitted to me last week because we're talking about doing group things, right, we're all gonna hang out, correct, he is really into the European soccer or football? Is he crushing on Ben?

He turned to me and he's like, hey, I have to tell you something a bit weird. I didn't know who brit was before I knew you, but I did know who Ben was. Oh, Ben's gonna love that, and I have a little fan by dinner. Oh that's cute. That's true. At least I'm gonna have something to talk about totally. Thats mean to be a good vibe.

work it out. And when I finally was cold enough to put it on one day, it never came off. I've been wearing an aughty for twelve months straight. I completely agree with this vibe. My vibe for the week is a product. Okay, Now, there are multiple things that I love about this product. If you caught a glimpse of our Instagram stories the other day, as the colder weather has hit Sydney, my skin is getting really dry.

So I have been using it as a facial cleanser for six months, and I can tell you right now you can use this as a facial cleans It gets your makeup off so well because it's oil based, right, which is where the dry skin thing comes into it. As it gets colder. It's really good to like wash yourself with oil products because it doesn't strip your body of oils in the same way that like soaps and

that kind of thing do. Another thing, you can use it in your private intimate areas because exactly like, yeah, I've been using it in there because I have I have a bit of a sensitive one and I do find that sometimes when the pH of soaps is too alkaline, I can get thrush. Like that's why the whole that you're starting to whisper as you say that, like the people, Well, it's because it like strips your body of the natural things. Right. This one for me hasn't been a problem. It's been

great it's only forty four dollars for the litera. That's a bargain. And the additional thing that I love about it is that you know, when you use antiperspirant deodorants, do you get that deodorant up under your under arms? Even if you use soap and stuff. I tend to find that there's still this like film. I think it's an anti persperant deodorant thing. Well, I found that the oil cleanser is really really good for getting that off.

So I am absolutely bloody vibing this product. And I will put a link in the show notes because now I'm okay, I've just purchased another one, so now I don't mind if they sell out. I don't mind if they sell out because I'm stocked up for like another six months. So it's the Bioderma many many words alter nourishing cleansing showers, and it's an oil. It's an oil shaller. The peg and the brand is Biover. All right, let's get into the questions.

the cuff, spontaneous. Oh yeah, don't give him plan anything ever. No, And I'm actually just thinking about the first date that I went on most recently with the person I've started seeing, and he really wanted to book ahead of time, and I was to say it. I was like, let's just

see what we feel like. I don't want to lock in any plans because we could get to it and The thing that I have a problem with booking things so far in advance is that you don't know a week your head what cuisine you're gonna crave, and so I feel locked into a decision. If you're booking somewhere, maybe it's best for you to be going to like an or you can ear buffet so you can pick your cuisine of the night just down at the RSL Grace. Sort of Yeah, but I think it depends where you live, right.

minutes in evance? I tried to book. But I think for a first date you probably do need to make a bit of an effort and lock something in the ink is a bit extreme. I'd give this guy a second crack if you enjoyed the night, give him second crack for sure, but tell him be like, Okay, if we do this again, I'm not walking around for another hour.

person because he just didn't book the first day. You know, there is a part that's like cool, you can book it if you won't, But there's it's the first day in he house you at. You want to feel like he's taking control and he's taking somewhere special and he's putting in the effort. I just tell him, I'll just say, hey, we're gonna do that again. You need to lock that shit in because like, these heels ain't made for walking. Okay, So yes or no? Do you think they should make

a booking at a restaurant if they ask you? Yes, Okay, Kisha, you want to fight me on it? I don't want to fight or because I can see that most people would be like, yeah, that's reasonable and normal. So I will say, okay, perhaps they should have booked, but also try and be understanding if some people are not really that way inclined. Yeah, it's not a reason to dump the guy. Like, if that's the worst thing he's done, he's be spontaneous with his food. You do it, okay.

Question number two? Do I have a right to be upset if my best friend forgets my birthday? Some context? I've been extremely close friends with them for over a decade since high school. I always know their birthday by heart, but without Facebook reminders of me making note of it on my social media, my birthday will pass without any thought on their part. I just recently seven ties with one best friend, and this was one of the small

reasons behind that decision. It feels hurtful and I feel forgettable, if that makes any sense. But I would like to know your thoughts on the matter. Should best friends know each other's birthdays without being reminded by social media? Oh?

birthday is my birthday. We have the same birthday, which is the twenty first of August, and you know the person that I'm dating. I think in terms of a friend group, I always remember around when it is I remember the month, or if it's at the end of that month, but I often don't remember until I'm reminded.

I understand why it might make you upset, especially because you know that you go above and beyond for your friends, and we always have as humans, we have this expectation of like receiving what we give, which sometimes isn't the case. I'm hoping, and I'm assuming your friends do give back to you and fill your cupping other ways.

date actually is. And I've actually done this to my mum, but her birthdays at the start of January, and you know that time period over Christmas where you have no idea what day it is, you have no idea what date it is. I have literally forgotten her birthday before, and I felt so bad about it. But that is what happens more often for me with my friend's birthday. If someone was to say, like randomly, what's blah blah blah's birthday, and it was, you know, six months away,

I'd be like, oh, they're birthdays on this day. But when it actually comes to it, sometimes I get the Facebook notification thing being like it's these people's birthdays and I'm like, oh shit, like I need to order some flowers for them, or I need to order something to be like here, you have a donut or a cupcake delivered to your work because you want to my closest people. I love you so much, but I just didn't know what the date of that actual day was. I have

forgotten my own birthday before. If I forgot your birthday means nothing. I have woken up before and been like, oh my god, it's my birthday, like I didn't even know. Yeah, that's because someone said, are you doing anything for your birthday? And I was like, well, when's my birthday? Well, I think that's the other part of this. It depends on whether the friend who's forgetting your birthday is what I would call a birthday person. So you know, we've all

got them in our lives. It's the people that have birthday month and they do things. They do a dinner, and they'll do a going out, and they'll do a cruise and they'll do all these things to celebrate their birthday because they are a birthday person and they love celeb braiding it and they were just born, like you've just been born. I mean, that's how we feel. You didn't win an award, but everything not everyone feels that way.

And so I'm trying to not put those people down because, like you know what, sometimes you need people like that with the big energy in your life to get you to go out and do different things. Yeah, And I mean we live a busy life, and I under same way. I mean humans, we live busy lives as adults, and at the end of the day, it's nice to find a reason and an excuse to go and celebrate. So I think that's what people do. It's like my birthday month,

fucking party month. Yeah, run and drop your workbooks totally. So I actually think that this is a bit more like it depends on whether the person that you're upset about forgetting your birthday is a birthday person. So obviously you're the type of person who would really put a lot of time and thought and effort into celebrating them. So the question is like, do they show up for you in other aspects of your life? Is this actually

that you're just feeling unappreciated by them in general? Are you feeling as though you're never really in their thoughts? Are you feeling as though they don't really check in with you on how you're going in your life? And this is it's just kind of like the cherry on top that they also don't seem to give a shit when you have your birthday come around.

doesn't mean you mean any less to them. It just means their brain is taking up more space on other things at the moment. Yeah, but in that situation, I actually think that it's the friends like that that should probably be celebrated more because I think that you know true. Additionally, we celebrate things like getting engaged, getting married, having kids.

Like if you're single and both of us are in this situation, I feel like I'm always celebrating other things with other people and getting them gifts, and you know, all of the hoopla around it, and I don't really have much that society tends to celebrate about me. So I do understand if you're falling into that category. If you're like, this is the one thing that I expect you to care about because I've supported all of these other things that you have had in your life totally,

But can you understand why. I'm sure they still want to celebrate it, but you can understand why they might have just forgotten it. Is my point. It doesn't mean you mean less to them, but you're upset that they're not remembering, Like this listener's upset that they're not You literally have said, they don't remember my birthday off by heart. They need a prompt.

little bit underappreciated in most aspects of this friendship. Yeah, I think so. I think there's probably there must be more to this, especially if you've said you know, I've said it up. But there are a few reasons there must be more, and I hope there is if it is just that, but just know that I'm sure it is absolutely nothing personal. I'm going to put a poll up, as we always do on a Thursday, we put our poles to ask guncut questions up because I reckon this

one could be interesting. I feel as though often, Britt, you and I feel very similarly about things like this because neither of us are kind of birthday people. Maybe that's a trait of people born on our day because you do have the same birthday. Also, the odds of that very rare. Like we're on like a three person

team and two of us have the one birthday. Yeah, and we will find out kind of what the general consensus is, because I feel as though most people may care a little bit more than what you or I really Yeah, yeah, because I have that's interesting to me. There's not one percent of me that would care if my friend for my birthday. I have friends in my life that are very much birthday people, and I think that they would be pretty offended if I didn't contact

them on the day. Luckily for me, they tend to share like a thousand Instagram stories of people think like how do you that day, queen, And I'm like, oh, text give them a call exactly. You get a reminder, Yeah, I get the reminder. I'm the person who needs the reminder? All right, question number three, Hi, ladies, I need your help. A bit of background. You've come to the wrong place. Sorry, you've come absolutely to the right place. A bit of background.

My partner and I have been together for almost five years and we are so in love. I am one hundred percent sure he is a person and I want to spend forever with He is my penguin. She didn't write that. I added that in. But I know he's about to propose because he told me I have a good indication.

price of something. But I have recently learned about engagement rings not because of my own? Is it because of mine? Is a secret squirrel? Because of mine? Twenty to know something to get my nails out there. I'm learning about the difference in things like lab grown versus I don't know what the actual term is. But in the wild diamonds yeah, like naturally mine versus lab grown. So I'm pro lab grown. Yes, me too. As it turns out, it's a lot more environmentally friendly and it avoids a

lot of trade that is unethical. Lab grown diamonds have identical I want to say, like genetic makeup. That is not the actual term, but the makeup of it is identical, identical, but it's ethical. Yeah. However, they don't have as good resale value. I did find out hopefully you don't resell your wing ring guys. That is a good point. So I think the monetary value is the thing that maybe is making this situation a little bit on the nose,

you know. Is it the style of ring that you want, Is it the quality of the diamond involved, Is it the size of the diamond? I think it's kind of one of these things where it's like, it's okay to really want what you want, particularly for something that you're planning on wearing for the rest of your life. But if he's not willing to spend that much on it, I think maybe you're gonna have to end up saying, hey,

this is actually what I want. So you tell me how much you're willing to put into it, and I'll actually put in the rest because this is exactly what I want. I know, our own engagement ring. I know it's not as in romantic, but like, this is what you want, and he's kind have made it clear that he's not willing to spend that much. I mean, I also don't know whether he's just a bit tight around the purse in other ways. But I don't think you're

crazy for caring about it. I think that maybe if you would rather him never propose, maybe you're gonna have to think about ways to get the ring that you really really want them. Oh, okay, there's a few things for this, a few layers. Let's start unpeeling this ungin. Yes, it's okay to want the ring you want ten thousand dollars. Absolutely, that is fine.

more so. When you first said, like, he won't buy my dreaming, I don't want to marry him, I was like, that's not right. I don't like that. But then when you say he does have the money, it does make you wonder, Okay, well, why isn't he willing to spend it? Why isn't he willing to spend it? I ask him that is it because.

get something else. No, but I think that that's the main thing. At the end of the day. I know it's upsetting that you're not going to get your dream ring, But is there not another ring? That you absolutely love as much, but maybe cost less. Is there a way that you can meet halfway? Maybe reconsider that you would rather not get married at all if it's not the ring, because if he's your person and your penguin, you'll definitely

work that out. Of course, wa Keisha said absolutely. If you want to add some money to your own ring, go for it. Maybe you can propose, and you've said you want to get married, Maybe you can, you know, settle on a ring, now propose, and then work it out later. Maybe in six months or a year you can upgrade it to something that you love more.

to contribute financially to their own engagement ring? I actually have no idea. I reckon there'd be people that would have.

But I actually think the more I've thought about this, as we've been speaking about it, I actually think that your deep underlying problem here is the fact that you've said something's really important to you and your partner, the person that you love the most in the world, is not really I don't know, I for respect that desire of yours is the phrase I'd want to use, but it's along those lines. It's one of the fact that he's being a little bit dismissive of something that's really

important to you. Well, I feel like in a way, you're thinking that he's saying, I don't think you're worth it. At the end of the day. It's like you're saying, I love this ring. It's ten grand though, and he's like, no way. There's a part of that that's like, oh, you don't think I'm worth that. You don't think our love's worth that. I totally understand that. I understand the reasoning why you're upset about it, for sure, and you're allowed to be upset about it. I just don't think

it's worth not marrying the guy is my thing. I think there's always a way you can work around it, for sure. I would really love a follow up of this one, and we haven't done an askun cut aftermath for ages.

I totally sleep over some of these. Yeah, send it in to our dms on Instagram, but just put a little summary of what your actual initial question was, and that goes the same. If you have a question you'd like the girls to unpack for Askuncut, just send it into our Instagram messages at Life on Cut Podcasts. Yeah, we love the detail, We love how it went down. If we maybe you took our advice, maybe you didn't, Maybe you took our advice and it blew up. Don't

send us one. You ruined my life. Please send them anywhere with the heading ask and cut aftermath, and we will do an episode soon. And on that note, that is us gone. I think Keisha, you might be feeling on next week's episode two. And then I think Laura's back in action. Yeah, we're not really sure of Laura's schedule at the we we haven't seen her in a while. I'm pretty sure it's been a year. What's that a Titanic, it's been eighty four years. I think I need to

do it. She's wellness check sends onto her house. No, she's been dancing Upper Storm and I'm excited for you guys to see her move soon. I think it's gonna be airing soon. So you're gonna have to all get behind her because she's definitely gonna need it and want it. You can follow our Facebook discussion group where a lot of the juicy stuff goes down. There's a link in the show notes, and we're also on TikTok. We're getting better. We're getting better at TikTok. We're on the TikTok.