Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land.
Sea and community.
We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait islander peoples today.
This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation.
Hi guys and I.
Welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura and I'm not pretty. I'm producing a feeling interbriate. You really jumped in there quick.
Didn't you see that You're about to say something?
I was like, And Brittany's not here, but don't worry, Producer Geisha is here to the rescue. No britt Look, she's got a few things happening at the moment. She's we're not currently able to record and so we are very very lucky to have the fabulous, wonderful, beautiful producer Keisha sitting in to talk to you all today about Tommy Lee's dick.
Can't wait to talk about Tommy Lee's pain. And also I realized this morning that you and I we've worked together for like a year and a half now this is our first like one on one, this is our first time recording together, just the two of us.
Also, I don't know why when you said that before you were like, this feels really intimate, it's our first time. I was like, this has got weird connotations that I don't think you should be saying to your work colleague. And we don't have a HR here because we're still recording it. If we had an age, none of us would have jobs.
No.
But also speaking of.
Which, I am wondering what is going on on your neck there, because Laura ben that, if I'm not.
Mistaken, is a huge hickey.
I know that you and Matthew Johnson went to a wedding on the weekend, so I'm starting I think that things was successful at the wedding and there was a celebration of love.
As if this thirty six year old woman mother to two has a hicky on her neck. Please, the people have been listening to this podcast long enough.
Okay, I'm gonna describe what is on Laura's net because obviously this is for all right, We'll check this on socials. About two centimeters quite a deep purple, almost looks like a kind of scratch like Master really got his teeth into It.
Doesn't look as bad on video as what it does in real life. No, the only fun Actually that's a lie. We did have sex on the weekend.
Congratulations, thank you, thank you everyone.
I have a minutes in heaven. Yeah. It was slightly, No.
It was. It was very drunk. It was after the wedding. It was wrong. Sex is fun if you're in a relationship, though, Yeah, it was. We want to get to the fun of the round.
It was because I had said to Matt. I was like, let's go home and have sex, and he was like, no, I'm too drunk. And then I was like, let's do it anyway, and he was like, no way, it's not happening. He was like, wow, I really didn't expect that tonight.
Yeah, that's and now you're here being like it was all right, I mean it. He warned you sometimes when they've had a lot to drink, it's not as funny. Nobody was. No, No, it was exceptional. It was just unexpected. That should be better.
Yes, it was great, but I would just like to go back to the hickey situation.
It's not a hickey. It is a burn from a curling ond that's what this is.
You know, I think that that's exactly what my friends and I all used to tell our mums when we were about seventeen as well. So it's a convenient little excuse there that. Oh no, I just I dropped my straight now on my neck by accident and all of a sudden purple.
I'm sorry, Are you trying to downplay my third degree burn? Is this what's happening here? Let's just stop talking about my potential Kiki also my sex life, love life.
We can we're.
Getting that is the foundation that this entire podcast is built off of.
That is true, but we have something far more exciting to talk about than my sex life.
I don't know if there's anything that exists that is exciting? Pretty do you tell me?
Missionary position that is seven minutes, thank you, producing, Keisha? Okay, that is, and we announced it on Instagram last week. We talked about it on last week's episode.
But we're doing our live show. Actually it's Britty. She's going to be there produced.
Keisha will think I'm going to be there too, right, you will definitely be there. I mean we haven't discussed will you be on stage? Will you be backstage.
I don't mind, just as long as I can be a part of it. You're like, do I have to buy tickets? Do I have to buy a ticket. We're doing a live show, baby, we.
Are doing our very first live show. It is on in Sydney. It's at the City Recital Hall. We are so sorry to everybody who is not in Sydney. We understand that that's monumentally annoying if you're not here and not able to come. But the reason why we're doing just one show to trial it, to test it out, is because maybe if it does well and we don't absolutely suck, we will roll it out next year.
Just dip in the little tip of the toe and just put it in, just just the tip. There's a lot of sexual in New windows Que early on in this podcast, which I'm assuming is exactly what the live show is going to entail of as well.
But we have at the moment completely sold out the bottom floor of the City Recital Hall. That's like eight hundred tickets already sold out. There's two more levels which there are seats still available, but not many. I think there's like only two hundred or maybe two hundred and fifty tickets left. So once they are sold out, which they absolutely will be this week, that'll be a sold out show and then you won't be had to buy a ticket. That's pretty exciting, Just like this little side note.
That's pretty fucking cool. I was telling my family about it this week. I was like, yeah, like, we're going to do a live show, and they didn't quite understand what that was. They were like, oh, the live radio recording and I was like, no.
I don't know. We do one of those every week.
I was like, we're going to get up and stand in front of people and talk about stuff, you know, probably our sex life.
One thy two hundred of them, and are we going to talk about for the other fifty three minutes?
Matt's brother, So Matt's brother. His name's David. Also single. If anyone is looking for a very handsome man in rock Hampton, excuse me, you work with Brittany and I. How have you not ever mentioned this? It's true? Oh you know, don't shit where you eat?
Oh you don't think we're up to the standard of the Johnson Fair.
No no, no, no, he's hot though, Yeah, reckon, you guys, get a little interesting.
A few single people coming to the wedding. Very nice. Tell Brittany to keep a pause off.
What I was going to say is that when I explained to him what the live show was, he stood there and went, oh, that's fucking frightening, And I was like, I know, I'm well aware.
So yeah.
Look, you know some people say faked to you make it, but I'm all about authenticity. I'm so excited and I'm equally very scared. It's going to be amazing. Come buy tickets. Well, let's do this together. There'll be lots of audience involvement. We've got some amazing guests already lined up. We've got some very fun music happening. All that's very secretive, but please don't miss out on buying a ticket.
Where can you buy tickets? You can buy tickets. Thank you so much for asking produce, because you know it's funny.
As the producer of your entire podcast, you would think that I would know exactly what the answer to that was, and you would think that that question was a little rhetorical or maybe rehearsed.
It's not. I actually do is it ticket tech?
Like, I know you know you're coming, but you haven't even looked to see where you buy the tickets from.
I didn't think I would need to purchase one, but if I were to, which maybe after this conversation, I will have to.
Is it this wipe up on Instagram? Buy or BUYO life on cut Pop.
You could go onto my website, which we do also have. This is news to you, isn't it.
No, No, I do update the website every week, so I'm across the website, but I didn't know that we'd put the tickets on there.
But it's good to find.
Let us tell you what today's episode is about. Go buy tickets like put pause us now go do that?
Come back.
Today's episode we are interviewing Lane Beachley. Now Lane Beachley, if you haven't heard of who she is. She is one of the greatest surfing legends of all time, a seven time World surfing champion. But there is so much more than just being a surfing champion. Lane's childhood is something that played a hugely profound role and impact in her life and the reason why she had such a drive to be successful, and part of that is because she was adopted into the Beachley family.
When she was born.
Now we're going to get into the full story, but the reason why Lane was adopted into the Beachley family was because she was conceived through assault. And it is truly a story where I think you sit back and your question like, what would you do if you're in that situation?
And also I think something even more interesting about Lane's stories that like, we look at surfing today and she was she came through earlier generation, a generation ago when women surfing in particular was not what it is today.
It was completely.
Underfunded, it was really undersupported, and she was kind of a pioneer of women's surfing. So her story of how she got to the success that she is, it's just it's phenomenal and I think she's an incredible woman. Also, her love life has been very interesting and quite spicy, and she is currently married to one of the members of the founding members of In Excess. His name is
Kirk Pengilly. They got married eighteen years ago. Their love story is remarkable, and yeah, I think you're really going to enjoy this episode.
But first, now, before we get into the deep and moving and quite beautiful part of the episode, let's talk about something that wasn't so moving but was extremely alarming Tommy Lee and the dick pic that he posted to Instagram on Thursday night, well, Thursday night our time, I think it was.
Early in the morning in the States. So for anyone who is in a work can I just.
Set this first. I did not see this on Instagram. I didn't get on there and see the unsolicited dig pic. I got sent it by producer Keisha, So not only did everyone else get it, was like.
Forced upon me through other channels. Excuse me. It is my job to find content for.
The podcast, Like I resent it to our podcast group and I was like, whoa, guys, this is wild.
By the time I send it to you, it had already been up for two hours.
No content, warning, no nothing, just a penis in my inbox. It's been a long time since I've just had a penis in my inbox.
So for anyone who missed it, and frankly, I don't know how you did, because it was it was genuinely everywhere Thursday evening our time. Tommy Lee, who is the fifty nine year old American musician. He is a part of the Motley Crue band and he's really known for the sex tape that was made with his then wife Pamela Anderson. He posted a full frontal selfie in the nude if you.
Haven't seen it.
I had conflicting feelings about how we were going to navigate this part of the recording. I was like, do I encourage people to go on Google it? But I guess the thing is he willingly posted it, so like totally, he's like consenting for you all to go and see it. It's not like his it's not like his eyecloud got hacked and these photos have been put out there without his you know will, or without like against his will.
And that's why he didn't have a problem screenshoining it and sending it totally. Because if this was like a leaked photo, I would feel very, very very conflicted about talking about it and about encouraging that kind of do you know what I mean? There's such a difference because he's the one who actually posted it.
Well, I guess just on what you said, Like if it was ELITD photo, I honestly think that when it's a leaked photo, talking about it actually is more problematic than letting it go under the radar because it encourages more people to go and google what the fuck is that that they're talking about. Whereas in this instance it was willingly posted Go Google, it is still very much on the internet. You can see exactly what it is
that we're talking about. But for anybody who doesn't want to see it in all its glory, I'll describe it to you a little bit.
He's sitting on the side of the bath.
He's taken a selfie which has no head, no and it is from just his torso his nipples, his completely well shaven penis well maintained, and his schlong because that's what.
You'd have to call it. It's very big. It's just dangling into the bath like slong and away.
And I let me tell you, I saw it and I didn't know how to feel, because I did at the start, I was like, Oh, that's pretty funny. And then as a mom, I was like, there are children on Instagram. Someone think of the children. And then I started to consider more of the conversation around what is censored on Instagram. First, what is okay to post? And now obviously this picture was absolutely not okay to post.
But the thing and the question and the conversation that has arisen is the fact that it did stay online for six hours.
Yes, Look, I think.
There are a couple of different ways that you can look at this, and if I'm being completely transparent, the very first way that I looked at it was whoa, and I laughed because I thought it was pretty fucking wild. But I also kind of thought it was a bit funny. The photo was filtered, it.
Was captioned oops.
I was like, oh, honey, this is a really desperate way to remain relevant. But congrats to you, because you know what, it fucking worked, and what's in his bio is order my new album.
The album came out in twenty twenty.
And if that is a successful publicity stunt to get eyes on your page, you have succeeded Tommy Lee. Now this is not to say I am very aware of how problematic of a person.
Tommy Lee is.
I got some some stats about Like I already had this idea in my head. I was like, I know that he's a bit of a trouble person and has a pretty checkered background. But just to give a little bit of context, in nineteen ninety eight, he said six months in a county jail pleading no contest to kicking Pamela Anderson while she was holding their son Dylan.
He's been in.
Trouble for swastika tattoos, instigating riots, racist comments, and assault.
Like this guy, he's not a moral citizen. He's not someone that I look up too.
And I would even go to say that I don't even think many of the one point five million people who follow him on Instagram are following him because they think he's an inspirational person.
Well, I guess the other part of this, like, look before we unpack the reasons why, obviously it's problematic and kind of the nuanced parts around this whole conversation, it is very obvious that Tommy Lee does not give a fuck, Like that is why he posted the photo. He doesn't care about Instagram's censorship. He doesn't care about what impact it has on you. He doesn't care whether you consented to a photo of his.
Dick or not. He doesn't care.
So us talking about like the why or the psyche behind what compelled him to post this is pretty irrelevant. But I do think the thing that was very interesting is and I'm part of this, so are you, Keisha, Like we saw that photo and our very first initial reaction was to laugh, right, and then we were like, okay, that's a bit uncool. Very recently, Britney Spears was also posting photos of herself where she was actively nude but
covering her private parts with her hands. And my initial reaction, and I would go as far as to say, as most people's initial reaction wasn't that's fucking funny. It was maybe there's something wrong, Maybe she's going through something that.
Is really interesting for me.
When I saw those photos of Britney Spears, a big part of me, a big part of me at the time thought, I get this because you have been so controlled for so long, and right now this is a middle finger to the men, like this is a kind of like now I can do whatever I want.
However, you are completely right. The amount of.
Conversations about like, oh my god, she's not well, like she's costing, you know, she's not okay.
And I think about this now and I think about my own bias to it, and I'm like, you know, and obviously the whole Free Britney movement is a very separate conversation. Everyone is like entirely stoked that she's not under conservativeship because that was royally fucked. But I think about my own bias and why was my bias? Like is she okay? Verse when a man does it? I thought, and I think a lot of other people thought that's funny.
So why is male nudity funny? And female nudity is something else that needs to be unpacked in moreover, like psychologically, what's wrong with that person?
Why would they do that?
And I think it goes to show that there is just two very different sets of standards when it comes to the way that we perceive nudity. But it also comes back to that whole notion about why are women's nipples sensored but not men's when ours has a functional purpose and there's literally there for no reason at all.
They have a bit of an evolutionary hangover.
Well, And I mean, as we have said, there are multiple layers to this, and most of the outrage that I saw was about the fact that they saw a penis when they didn't want to, which is fair enough.
Like I said, it's been a long time since I've been sent an unsolicited dig pic, like long time really? Well, I mean, no, I'm not single, you are. When's the last time you got one?
Unsolicited. When was the last time you got one at all?
The last time they got one was much more recently, but unsolicit. It's been a while since I got one unsolicited entirely. I think the other ones I received were encouraged.
But look, I mean, on top of that, in terms of this gender conversation about what isn't isn't okay on Instagram, I actually personally have a friend who's a sex worker and she's had I think upwards of three accounts completely removed before because she was found to violate the nudity's standards and in none of the photos that were actually the reason that they were taking her accounts were taken down.
Was she actually nude?
So what was she showing in these photos to have the accounts taken down? Or was it more the conversation that was taking place.
Look, I'm not sure, I'm not Instagram, but the photos were raunchy, but she was not nude, So it kind of go It starts to make me question, Okay, so what's the difference between her posting photos that are almost nudes.
Super hot photos?
She looked great and it's her business that she's a sex worker, so she was promoting her business as a lot of us still on Instagram, Right, what's the difference between that and Tommy Lee? And the only thing I could think of was, Tommy Lee has a blue tick, is a verified account?
Yes, And this was the big cause of outrage, right, the fact that this dick pic stayed online for six hours. It was still on Instagram's platform six hours after it was posted. Now something that I haven't seen come up too much in conversation around this, because I know a lot of people are talking about this dickpic, but it has to do with verification.
So some of you might remember.
But back in twenty fourteen, Rihanna had her entire account removed because she posted a photo which was her top, like you could see parts of her nipple, and it was a cover photo that she had done for a French magazine called lou And she posted the cover photo and her account was taken down and suspended. Rihanna then completely boycotted the platform because she was like, fuck this, I don't want to be on Instagram where I'm having
my images, which are editorial commercial images censored. Instagram turned around and in order to combat that, what they did is they created a system. So part of their algorithm is if you have a blue tick and people are reporting you, your content is not taken down anywhere near
as quickly as somebody who's not verified. And the reason for that is because so many people who do have a blue tick have their content reported all the time, and so it's to stop these sort of trigger algorithms that would allow someone's account to be taken down.
And that's kind of I mean, I'm.
Not here defending Instagram because like that is not the hill that I want to die on. But my thought is is that's what's happened here. There has been something in the algorithm. Obviously, millions of people would have been reporting this image. I have no doubt that Instagram was
copying a huge amount of reports for violation of the codes. However, I think because of this weird loophole for being a celebrity, it's not just because he was a man, but it's because he's like a celebrity man that he was able to get away with it for so long.
Do you know what I'm And this could be a little bit conspiracy theory of me, but remember how last week and the week before there was all of that shit about how Instagram had changed to be more like TikTok. The CEO of Instagram had to come out and be like, guys, we stuffed up.
We're going back. Kylie Jenner with someone.
Who was outspoken about how much she hated the changes, And there were all those memes about warning Instagram to just go back to its former glory of nice pictures of her friends right a part of me and it could be look, this is completely me chucking a question into the air and going did Instagram know about this?
Sorry? Instagram is international, Oh they know. It's not like they were asleep. They weren't all asleep.
There were people there monitoring it. And the stories that were being shared of Tommy Lee's picture were being taken down for nudity. So like, let's say you worked for Instagram. You see that and you go, okay, we need to take that down.
It's got nudity. Where did that come from? The whole world right now is putting up all of these pictures of this penis?
Where is it coming from? Six hours, very long time to respond. But if you want to turn the conversation away and back to everyone talking about this photo that was posted on Instagram, and away from the fact that they stuffed up this new format that tried to make it look like TikTok. Guess what's a good way to do that. Let it go up, Let the world talk
about Instagram. Let them kind of divert that conversation away from how it's becoming this older platform that people are not enjoying as much, and let them talk about Instagram.
So instead they have an old fifty six year old man posting his dick.
I'm not waiting as him to do it, Okay.
I think they might have seen an opportunity and gone, how can this benefit us?
When did kisha petit turn into an a theory?
I'm a little bit suss on them, just because of how much the backlash about Instagram had, and like we all know that TikTok has started to take over from Instagram.
I'm a little bit it.
He'll be a bit tinfoil hat going on, but I reckon that there could be something to it.
Okay, Well, I hours is a long time. It is a lot media world, Yes, it's a very long time.
Well, I actually did a poll because I guess when I kind of unpacked the way that I felt about this whole thing. And let me tell you, I have spent way too much time thinking about Tommy Lee's dick pick, like far too long, but I wanted to put a pole out there to see how you guys were all feeling about it. Now, there was eight more than eight thousand people who responded to this pole, and these were
your options. I said, if you saw Tommy Lee's schlong on install last night, did you think it was a fucking funny Twenty one percent of you said you thought it was fucking funny, b absolutely fucked, thirty eight percent of you thought it was absolutely fucked, and see didn't really care. Forty one percent of you said you didn't care, which probably means we've been speaking about it.
For way too long.
But the other thing I wanted to add, and I think that this I mean just taking it away from Tommy Lee, taking it away from the fact that it was like we none of us consented to seeing this dick pic. The thing that I also find very interesting is just how much Tommy Lee's penis has been spoken about over the years, and how much he hasn't had a say in his penis being spoken about. So when we talk about the sex tape that was released of
him and Pam that was released against their will. His sex tape, as along with Pamela's, was released against both.
Of their wills.
Pamela was hugely the victim in that because of the way that society perceived her at the time, and Tommy Lee kind of came out of it as a bit of a champion because his penis was so big.
Yes, he came out notorious and she came out as the quote unquote slut who filmed a sex tape.
But he still didn't ask for that to happen. He still didn't want that sex tape to be released. The second thing as well in this is that if anyone has seen the Tommy and Pam docuseries that came out, there is a whole segment where he is standing in this and obviously it's an actor, but imagine if you had a docuseries made about you against your will and there is an actor there talking to his penis. The shot is like a full frontal penis shot of Tommy
Lee's what's supposed to be Tommy Lee's penis. It's been tattooed and everything to make it look exactly what Tommy Lee's penis looked like in the sex tape, so once again his genitals are out there for public conversation and for public viewing.
And then I.
Almost feel like this is him getting to a point where he's like, fuck it here it is.
Look.
I think this conversation could be, Like, I definitely can see what you mean about him wanting to have ownership of his own body and or of his own body parts. I think it could be a very different conversation if he wasn't as proud of his dick like he was made famous. He was already famous, but he was made a lot more famous because of the look of his penis. And it's been I knew before I saw this photo. I have never seen the sex tape, I've never seen
the Pam and Tommy dockuseries. I already knew from the pop culture space that Tommy Lee apparently has a big dick.
Yeah, I agree, but I also think, like, let's look at this from the alternate perspective for a minute as well. And I, like I said, I am not here defending Instagram, nor am I here defending Tommy Lee, because I sit on the side of thinking it was wildly inappropriate. I have kids who absolutely do not need to see a man's penis on Instagram. Like, I think it was pretty fucking disgusting, but I do think it's an interesting thing
to unpack. Let me flip this for a second, just going back to this idea of the double standards and the way that we kind of view female nudity versus male nudity. Imagine if her female had had a sex tape released where her and like this has happened. You don't need to imagine it, but like, just follow me
along here. If a woman had had a sex tape released where her volver was front and center, then a docu series was made where her vulver once again was visibly front and center, and she didn't have ownership of it, and everyone was talking about it where her volver was talking. That's what happened in the docuseries. Tommy's penis was talking back to him. Then a few months later, she posted a photo of her.
Actual volver to Instagram.
Would we think it was a statement or would we think that it was just her doing a power play and trying to like claw back some sort of publicity. Would we view it differently?
I think yes, I think, and I think it's a really interesting point that I hadn't actually thought about until he sat down to record this and you mentioned it, like, I don't think that i'd actually thought about it. In terms of if Pam were to do this, I would think it was a statement of her being like, I'm trying to get ownership of this back. I wouldn't necessarily have. I very much agree you made me think about how I initially thought this was pretty funny, but it wouldn't
have been my response if Pamela. I wouldn't have thought it was hilarious. If Pam had been the one to post it.
Who would have ever thought that a dick pic would be so thought provoking. This is certainly the most I've ever thought about one in my entire life.
Well, actually, we had a lot of Facebook discussion in the discussion group. You can join it a life on Cut discussion group on Facebook. There was a lot of conversation about this, as I'm sure you are not surprised by. But there was one comment by one of our Facebook friends, Christiana,
and I just loved this. She said, in all fairness, not a looking dong, a sight to behold something I'd be proud to show off when asked politely, of course, but not what I wanted to see while passing my morning stool, I thought, is exactly how the.
Rise the Well felt perfectly.
All right, Well, with all of that out of the way, let's get into our favorite part of the episode, accidentally unfiltered.
All right, I'm gonna go first.
A few years ago, I was in a shopping center and I had to kill time before a job trial. I decided to quickly go into a swimwear store and try on some bikinis. I picked a huge handful of different options and went into the Chaine rooms. I saw the sign on the door that said please keep your underwear on when trying swimwear. But for some reason, I decided I was going to ignore this. I felt like I couldn't see what the bikini looked like properly with undies on underneath.
That's fair, and that's why they have the plastic thing. It's not fair. It's that is fucking rankicking. It is not fair. This was you. You wrote this in Okay.
After I put a pair of swim bottoms on, then I looked at my phone and I realized the time I was running late. I quickly put my pants on over what I thought were my undies and walked out of the change room and handed the retail worker the swimmers that I didn't want. As I walked out of the store, the security buzzer went off and I realized I had walked out with the swimwear bottoms on and I had handed the retail worker my dirty undies. I was so embarrassed and realized I would either have to do.
It run up.
Steal the bikini bottoms, but I felt too guilty to do that, so I ended up having to walk back inside the store, colect my undies off the counter directly from in front of the woman, go back into the change room, change into my undies, and then I handed the bikini bottoms, which I had clearly tried on without underwear, despite the warning signs, back to the woman.
This was the epitome of my most embarrassing moment. I have a question, that's a wal cachet. Why didn't you buy them?
I'm sorry if she knows, and you know, and everyone knows that you have rubbed your vagina on those swimmers, they are not selling.
You need to buy those are syllable. That's why they have the plastic.
I'm sorry that you cannot try undies on in a shop you can't like.
The plastic sticker is just in case that you're maybe your underwear is not thick enough. It's not for direct contact.
I mean, I very much agree what I'm thinking about anyone else trying them on, because I don't want anyone else trying on.
Zimt Imagine if you bought a perisoners that some one had tried on in a store, and then you, with your hands, peeled off that sticker you've touched.
You just touch their vagina. I mean, without any of the pleasure.
You got nothing out of it, nothing other than the remnants of a good time.
You literally just got rubbish. That's all you got out of it. On this poor girl, I know why she didn't buy the underwear.
Because she got to get to a job trial, because she didn't have a job, Because.
That's why she couldn't buy the swimwear.
Okay, I also think that you have way too much sympathy for her, and I still think you might have written that in your chat once you're acciently unfiltered.
Okay, So I'm an emergency nurse, and because you're pretty much always rushing around, I had this habit of when someone asked for a vomit bag or looked like they needed it, I would grab a bag that comes neatly folded in its own little plastic ring, and I would punch my hand into the opening it would open it out. During one hectic shift, I was looking after a patient whilst I was standing at the bedside, who said to me,
I think I need to vomit. I reached up, I grabbed the only bag left on the shelf, and I punched my hand into it. To my dismay, I quickly realized that the bag had already been used and I had vomit up to my elbow, as someone had already vomited in the bag and neatly folded it back onto.
The shelf instead of putting it into the bin.
So she literally just punched her hand. Punched her hand into liquid. It actually gets washing a bag of vomit.
It gets worse.
My patient still had throw up, and because there were no free vomit bags, ended up throwing up into their own hands on the bed, and so I sent the next twenty minutes apologizing cleaning up my patient, wiping their own vomit off of them, changing the vomit bed sheets, and also washing my entire right up.
Can you imagine how confused that patient would have been when she picked up a full vomit bag and put down And also, I know the vomit is one of those conversations that makes people really squeamish. But I was once on a public train, super hungover. I went and saw Florence in the machine and I was so hungover, and I get motion sickness at the best of times.
Dude.
I was sitting on a Country Link train driving back to Wollongong, and I felt it from the depths of hell, and the only place there was was to vomit into my hands. And then I just had to drop it. What were you gonna do with it?
What mean you just had to draw? I can't carry it down. It was dripping. I couldn't carry it down the carriage. I just left it.
I mean I didn't just leave. I had to tell the lady that I had motion sickness. I did not tell her that I was hungover. I felt even more embarrassed. Anyway, this is not about me.
I love how both of us have written in accident the unfiltereds today, I've been making art in my other people.
This one time I punched a bag of mom It.
Anyway, guys, on that note, let's get into the chat with Lane Beachley.
Laane Beachley is a seven times world champion surfer. She spent nineteen years of her life on tour, and she was a pioneer for women in the sport of surfing. She's regarded as the most successful surfer in history, and she joins us on the podcast today.
Now, we like to start every one of these interviews in exactly the same way. Is that we like to start with an accidentally unfiltered story where you tell us your most embarrassing story.
Well, the challenge for me, Laura, is not to tell you my most embarrassing story. It is to pick which most embarrassing story to tell you. My life has been filled with embarrassing moments.
Make sure it's the worst one like that, don't censor it.
There was one I wanted to tell you, but I'm just so ashamed by my behavior that I just got.
I mean, that's perfect, That's exactly what we're here for.
Do you know what though it's so it's one of those things that's so galvanizing, Like everybody has something that they're so absolutely mortified by.
That they are like, I'll never ever share.
It, and that's the story that you should share because it makes everyone else feel better.
Okay, I don't know how this could ever make anyone feel better. Certainly doesn't make me feel very good about it, but I have to get over it. So the more I share it, the more I'll process it, the less I'll care about it, and then it's out there in the world. One of the most embarrassing stories that when you ask this question, the first I always trust. The first one that comes to mind was when I was competing in Fiji many many years ago. There's about two
thousand and one and your two thousand, two thousand and one. Anyway, we're at Tavarula, beautiful tropical island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean over there in Fiji. It's one of my favorite places to visit. The people is so warm
and friendly and respectful. And at the time my relationship with my former partner go called Ken was really starting to dissolve, and in a typical athlete tenacious form, I just pretended that everything was okay, and even though I knew I was behaving in ways that was not congruent with who I am or aligned with my values. And we decided to party one night, and the contest was still midway. We hadn't completed it, but let's just get
on the booze and hope for the best. And so we were partying, and everyone had gone to bed except for me, a lifeguard, and a couple of other None
of my competitors were still out. It was just like one of the one of the lifeguards, one of the people who kind of work around there, and then me, and we decided that we were still thirsty even though they put padlocks and chains around the fridges, and I decided that there was a possibility we could possibly get under that and steal a couple of drinks because we just needed to keep going. Nothing good happens after eleven o'clock at night, right, you don't need to drink anymore.
Eleven o'clock is early.
Usually people say nothing good happens after two. Eleven o'clock is fair as well, nothing good happens after that.
I feel like nothing good happens after a padlock A fair comment.
Nothing goods happens after a padlock has been put around a bar and you think it's an invitation to get in there. So I had the lifeguard lift and it was one of those benches bench freezers fridges, and he was lifting it up, straining the chain and the padlock, and so I'm reaching in to try and get my arm in this fine little hole between the top of the freezer and the rim. And as I'm reaching in to grab what really felt like a very warm beer.
As I'm reaching into, the chain breaks, the freezer hits me in the chin. My tooth goes through my lip. I get a fat limp, and all of it has been captured on CCTV. So I then have to front up and face the music the following morning. Meanwhile, before that happens, I have to go and surf for heat. The waves pop up overnight. I'm hungover, feeling very sad and sorry for myself, with a fat lip, and incredibly embarrassed by my behavior. Anyway, I go out, I lose
anyone surprised I lose in that heat. I come in and then the general manager of the tour at the time decides to rake me over the coals and made me watch the vision back and explain myself.
Oh, no, unnecessary. He knows what's happened.
We've seen it, do you know what, though, You're just lucky that this wasn't of the time of social media, or that's where it would have ended up, and then you would be reliving it all the time.
The amount of things that I've done that have not been captured on social media is an absolute blessing in disguise. There's no way that my career would have the adulation and respect that it has. Everything that I did that was somewhat duplicitous or nefarious was caught on capture on social media.
What I'm taking of that story, anyway, is just that you like a challenge, Like you saw an obstacle, you thought there's a way to overcome this. Unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way.
Solutions focused well, Lane.
We often start these interviews by asking what was your childhood like? And I feel like for you, your childhood has had such a profound impact on who you are as a person, and it's such an interesting part of your story. Could you tell us a little bit about what it was growing up as a Beachley, but more so, how you became a Beachley in the first place.
So I was adopted into a beach loving family with the last name Beachley and became a world champion surfer.
How many times have you heard that?
That is so coincidental that you were adopted into the Beachley household and you spent your whole life.
On the beach. I'm sure that's the fast I remember, right.
If only I was given a dollar for every time I heard that, So you now owe me a dollar?
Okay?
Highyeah. And my dad was a surfer, and my brother Jason's a surfer, and the mother whod me was not a surfer, but love the beach. So we would just spend every day possible at the beach. I remember being plunked on the sand before I could walk, and I remember falling in love with the nature and the beauty and the freedom of the ocean and the sand and the sun. I mean, the ocean is my happy place
and still is to this day. So I was very fortunate to have been adopted into that beach loving family and then be given the opportunity to fulfill my dreams and ambitions and set such audacious goals. But when I was four years old, that's when I started surfing. When I was five years old, I started surfing on the ocean side. I actually started surfing on the harbor side. When the fairies came in. That's when I would test my balance and ride my foaming.
And this was at Manly Beach. Is that correct?
Manley Beach? Yeah, the most appropriately named beach in the world. Nantown I call it. And yeah. And so by the time I'm six years of age, I'm out there having a ball. And that's when we lost Valerie. We lost my mum, Valerie to high blood pressure. She had a brain hemorrhage on the operating table during cosmetic surgery of all bloody things.
Wo.
So that was deeply distressing. And then that's when kids started asking questions, why do you look so different to your family? Where do you come from? Because all my family are over six foot tall, they're pasty white skins, they got brown hair, and I'm five foot well and five five. I've got dark olive skin. I've got bright blonde hair and bright blue eyes. So I didn't really look very much like my family. There was very few
similarities as an eight year old. That's when dad decided to tell me that I was adopted and he knew nothing about my biological family at all.
How did you take that information as an eight year old?
At firstly I felt like the couch was swallowing me whole. I felt so scared because I had wrapped my identity around this story that I belonged here, this is my family unit, this is where I've always come from. And unfortunately, by the time you're six, your brainwaves have shifted and instead of being a narcissist and everything's happening about you, to you and for you, your brainwaves get to this capacity where you can judge, criticize, analyze, and create meaning
around stories. So my dad said, you're my baby girl. We've always loved duty of not a blood relation. I heard, you've been abandoned by your own mother. You've been rejected by your mother. Your own mother didn't even want you. Therefore you are undeserving of love. That's how I took it. So I was very scared, felt very abandoned, felt very rejected,
and instantly decided that I was now worthless. And I thought that the only way I could become worthy or deserving of love is that if I become a world champion surfer. So that's literally the goal that I set myself as an eight year old was to become a world champion, not a surfer, just a world champion, and I basically wrapped all my sense of self worth, my identity, my vision of success was around unless I become a world champion, I will never be deserving of love.
Did you feel resentful or angry that you didn't know earlier? Because I feel like by eight, you really, even though you're still so young, as you said, you have this real understanding of your identity, of your place in the world. And also, coming off the back of your mother's death, you've already lost a cent of identity. You're already in this turmoil and grief to then be given another piece of information that who you thought you were doesn't quite fit into that puzzle anymore.
Was there resentment there?
It's a difficult thing to reflect on and anchor down those feelings. I have no doubt there was sadness. There must have been anger and frustration and that sense of loss because I lost my sense of identity and my sense of belonging, my sense of being and I don't remember. I don't recall feeling resentful or having resentful is not really an emotion that I tend to resort to. But there was definitely anger and sadness involved, for sure.
And when was it that you found out about your biological mum?
Was that you know in your childhood or was that much later in life?
Much much later? So Dad told me when I was eight. I then joined the pro Tool fresh out of high school when I was seventeen, and then traveling the world seeing what the rest of the world has was very eye opening. And I often say that joining the pro to a fresh out of high school gave me a much broader education than any institution could ever give me. But it also opens when you open cans of worms.
It presents as many questions as it does answers. So I started to seek more understanding of who am I, Where do I come from? Why am I the way that I am? Because I was constantly either being judged or ridiculed or told that I was this way, and I wanted to get an understanding of where does this behavior or where do these characteristics emanate from? So I went to the birth Deess and Marriages Registry in Sydney and applied for my original birth certificate because in the
seventies it wasn't mandatory to have connection or contact. You didn't have to leave your details as a biological parent to allow you. Actually there was vetos on a lot of kids in that stage to actually prevent them from reaching out to connect with their biological families. So I fortunately when I applied there was no contact veto and
I received my original birth certificate. So that gave me my mother's name, my name that I was born with, which was Tanyamara's Gardner, and it gave me an understanding of who she was and where she was at. So she was born in Glasgow, she was living in Surrey Hills, she was seventeen years of age. So we just put a story around that that perhaps maybe she was a
backpacker or you know, who knows what happened. But that gave me some sort of solace in understanding, Okay, this is who I am, and this is where I've come from, and this is why I was given up And that helped me kind of piece it all together. And you know what, that same general manager of the tour decided to hand me because that certificate. That birth certificate came to me while I was in South Africa preparing to compete.
Actually I was competing. It was a day that I was competing, and he received it from my flatmate who faxed it through and he decided I hand it to me fifteen minutes before I paddled out, like just clueless. So he adds me and my birth certificate right before I've paddled out, and of course it messes with my head, and I still win because I'm able to pull myself together. But that was the first indication of my original identity, and then that set the wheels in motion.
What did you do with that information? I mean, even just knowing what your birth name was. I can't even imagine how foreign that must have felt. What do you do with that information? When you have a little bit of an insight into who your birth mother is, you.
Take time to process it. That's fortunately what I did. I mean, I'd processed it while I was in the water, which was a massive distraction and I almost lost the heat, but I was able to get my head back in the game. And then I came in and I spoke to friends about it, who understood the journey that I've been on and were willing to share in that journey, and I shared some of my questions and just spoke about it, just shared it because a problem shared is
a problem halved. And it did present quite a lot of challenges to me and understanding how important this piece of information was to fulfilling my desire to get a clearer picture of who I am and why I am there. But the thing is that what it did teach me is that we don't need to rely on our past
to determine our future. You know, our past is a great reference point and we can learn a lot from it, But we decide who we are, We decide how we show up, how we feel, how we behave, and we can't keep relying on the events of our past or the genetic predisposition of our ancestors to predetermine how we
feel about ourselves. So in the hindsight, I realized I was relying on historical references to validate who I am today when in actual fact, the only one that gives me permission to do that is me.
Did your biological moment at the time know who you had become and the successes that you had.
Gained no, and we didn't make contact first time until nineteen ninety nineteen ninety nine reached out to me. So I was twenty seven and I was about about six weeks away from winning my second world title. All these dates and numbers your following when.
You've got so many trophies time, I do remember.
Just by the years. I know, I won my first one in nineteen ninety eight, so it's on from there. And so she reached out to my dad and at the time, somehow she said she'd been searching for me for years and she found I don't know how she found it, but she found that my last name was Beachley, and the first person in the phone book under that name was my dad, and so she reached out to him.
And that was the time that she found out that my mother had died when I was young, and that I grew up without the family unit that she so desperately wanted me to have, and that my name had been changed, and that was all a lot for her to process because she had these grand ideals around. You know, she wanted me to grow up with the name Tanya. She wanted me to have a mother and father, you know, she wanted all these things for me that she couldn't give me, and so she felt like she'd let me down.
And my dad did his best to reassure her that she know she's part of a very loving family unit and that she's done okay for herself. But she's Indonesia. So she wrapped this story around the fact that I've made perhaps I'm a journalist and I've gone to Indonesia to find a story or something. Anyway, Google No, she googled me and found out who I was and what I'd done, and so then she got all excited and then got a little too excited because after my I was in I was on a surf trip in Indo
went back to Hawaii. Dad ranged me and said, your mother's called. And I was like, well what, Dad, Yeah, first mom's dead. No, by lund, your mother's God like what I gave her you? I gave her your name, but I didn't give her your number, and I told her you would make contact with her when you were ready. And then there was all these stories from you know, my partner at the time. I wonder if she's googled you.
I wonder if she's a gold digger, you know, if she's a fame, bit of a moth, you know, moth after a bright flame. Who knows what the circumstances are, but you know, he wrapped all this kind of almost fear ambiguity around it, and I just wouldn't look I trust it. I'm going to make the conversation. I'm going to make the effort to have a conversation with it, but I'm going to wait till I get home, when I'm in my own home and my own space and
I can feel comfortable and relaxed. Before I had that chance, she picked up the phone and called my home phone number and then tried to make up for the last twenty seven years in the first fifteen minutes of our first phone call together. So it was really confronting.
I guess there's so much for you at that point to package up and to actually get your head around. And also for someone you said your mum was seventeen or your birth mother was seventeen when she put you up for adoption, there's also a lifetime of her wondering where your life is and wondering about this child that she said goodbye to. Can you tell us a little bit around why she at that time, at seventeen put you up for adoption.
Yeah, I'd say the one big regret I have is actually never of deciding to view it from her perspective. You know, it was all about me.
Impossible too though at that age.
Yes, of course, but I didn't take the time to think, imagine what I have, no idea what she's been through to give birth to me. And in the seventies, you know, it would have been easily to abort me. There was no guarantees that she was going to keep me. And so in the first meeting I hear from her that
she went on a date. She was an aspiring model and went on a date with a guy who owned a modeling agency, and after dinner he invited her back to his place, and she thought that that was an innocent introduction, and then he took advantage of her and raped her, and then I was conceived. So essentially I'm the product of date rape. And she says in my book that she picked up the phone and called him
and said, this is what you've done, goodbye. And so we don't actually have any record of this guy who what I know his first name, don't know his last name, and SBS have come knocking asking me to do who do you think you are? And when they basically ran all the facts that my mum had about this guy, they all rang true. You know, there's really no evidence of this guy, so I can't do that. I have no connection to the paternal side of my being, but
that's okay. I have a very nurturing dad and loving husband, and so I connect in that way. But as far as try to make sense of it, it's very difficult because it's smoke and mirrors back there. No, there's no real guarantees about what I'll find, so I can see through date rape and then her parents told her that she wasn't allowed to keep me, so she put me up for adoption, and then the rest is history.
You know, you said something early on which really like I've been waiting to bring it back up with you, so sorry to pull it back up from the depths of the interview. You said that when you very first decided like I'm going to be a world champion, I'm going to be the best at this, I'm going to succeed, that a lot of those feelings were spurred on when you were eight years old and you found out that you had been adopted, and you were like, I'll prove
my worthiness. I want to get into that whole period of your life and the successes that you did have. But what do you do when you have created a whole life around achieving, succeeding and being the absolute best at something. What happens when you come to the end of that journey and your whole identity and worthiness is tied up in being one thing.
You feel lost. That's what happened. You lose all sense of self. I mean, it's a wonderful question because everybody goes through it, especially if you're as fiercely dedicated, committed and tenacious as I am. And I did feel really lost at the end of my career, even though I chose to retire, and it was a really easy decision to make. For retire, I'm still working as hard as ever, But.
From that one thing that you were like, that's it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I had to find a mentor to help me through it because I kept thinking that I had to reinvent myself. I kept thinking I had to do the next thing that was going to bring me that next sense of fulfillment. Annihilation, nothing compares to standing on a podium in a bikini, holding a world titled trophy above your head, being sprayed with champagne. It's just there's no nothing like.
It, you know, for me, that's a regular Saturday like that on a podium.
Getting sprayed and hanging out in your bikini. He's single, she's living the best life.
A trophy above your head. It's irreplaceable, and it's it's a difficult thing to let go of. Like when you say, Laura, when you defined yourself by it, you know your whole sense of self and identity has been wrapped up in it. So I had to redefine. I had to let go and start all over again. As Ben Crow often says, I was a human doing and I had to become a human being. And I learned so much from my
professional career. And that's what I'm teaching people today, either through a wake academy or from on stage as a motivational speaker or facilitator. But ultimately it's about defining who you are, how you feel, and what you want and then you can then go and see gifts with the world. But if you're sense of self worth is constantly wrapped up in things outside of you, then no matter what
you do, you're never going to be enough. And then you're riding this roller coaster when one day you're successful, so therefore you're up, and the next day you may fail, so therefore you're down. And then it's just like this consistent roller coaster that just slaps you around and there's just no comfort, no satisfaction, no joy, and it just it rips you apart to the point where when you if you become so identified with and defined by things outside of you that your heart is just never feel
and it's never full, it's never filled. You just feel incomplete and unhappy and dissatisfied all your life.
Plane it makes me question, you know you were You're a seven times world champion. You're the only surfer male or female to ever get six in a row, so the most successful.
Not even King Kelly. You can read six.
When you are at that level of a success, I assume, I mean I I've never done anything to that extent, so I can't personally relate like to have that amount of dedication to something.
Do you have to be one hundred percent?
You know?
Are you talking about that?
You struggled after you retired because it was the only thing that you identified with. But is there any other option, Like, when you are so wholly devoted to surfing, was there time for anything else?
Yes? Absolutely, I made time for other things. And no matter how much you love your job, and no matter how committed you are doing, you still need a break from it. And I learned that early on because we often believe that the only way achieved something is through the way in which we know. And what I've learned throughout my career is that I can disprove what I know by learning how to do it a different way.
So I've won seven world titles. I won six in a row, but I only won two in a state of love, the other five a one in a state of fear. And the way that I differentiate the two is when I'm in a state of fear, I'm outcome driven. So when I'm not winning, I am losing and I am a dismal failure. When I'm losing, I beat myself up, I give myself hard time. So now I'm winning at all costs. If you're not with me, get the fuck
out of my way. I'm on an absolute mission and I'm on a path of destruction, so I must win. You don't understand how much of my self worth, my identity, everything about me is wrapped up in this and if I don't achieve this, then it's your fault, So piss off, leave me alone. I got to get this done. That's world titles number two to six, number one to seven, my loved based world titles. We're one in a love of process. How can I be better today than I
was yesterday? If I'm a little bit fatigued, then what do I need to do to re energize my body? If I'm feeling really focused and energized, am I making the most use of that particular amount of energy? So everything was self actualized. Everything was in alignment. And when I had good days, there were good days. But when I had bad days, they weren't bad days, they were speed bumps. So when I wasn't winning, I was learning. So the victim mentality is if I'm not winning, I'm losing.
The victor is if I'm not winning, I'm learning. It's a really subtle mindset shift to go from losing to learning. But it just comes down to a commitment and asking yourself is the way in which I'm going after my goals, or the way in which I'm pursuing my ambition sustainable because welld title number one and seven prove to me that it can be done in a sustainable, fun and effortless way if you continue to thank yourself in gratitude. Well titles number two to six, which were win at
all costs mentality, must get this job done. If my body's breaking, it's just a sign that I have to work harder. I will not honor my body, I will not honor my health. I will sacrifice and compromise every aspect of my being because if I don't win, I will not be deserving of love. And I prove to myself that I was worthy and deserving. And Well title number one, why did I stop trusting in that? Because I've place to story around it?
That was going to be my very next question. I was like, why did something change? At World title number two?
I just expected more of myself. I thought that the world expected more of me, and the only way that I was going to fulfill that expectation is by working twice as hard, trying twice as hard, doing twice as more. And then I wonder why my body breaks down. So halfway through the first nineteen ninety nine was my second world title, and in May I tear the medial ligament
in my right knee. Now, instead of taking six weeks out, I take ten days out, and I come back and I surf and I compete, and then I win the richest event in the world at the time with a knee brace on. And then the next time I fracture a rib, I surf. Well, it feels like I've got a punctured lung. You know when there's a rib out and it just feels like it's constantly hitting you with lungs. You can't breathe properly. And then I smash my face.
I get a wave that lands on the back of my neck, horne heads a disc because heav's my spinal cord. Eighty percent of my spinal cord is seven My left arm is numb, atrophy pins and needles, blood, hot butter knife, wedge between my shoulder blades. You know what I did, ignored it. Let's just keep going, Let's just keep pushing through. A wave lands on the smaller my low back folds
me in half, crushes my lumbar spine. Paddle back out thirty minutes later to win another world title, like just push, push, push, it all costs, gotta win. And now in my fifties, I am in constant pain management. I have to go and see physios, I have to do cryo chambers, I have to see chiropractice, massage therapists. I have at least two sessions a week just to manage my body because I didn't honor it when I was competing.
You know, you speak about this from someone who worked and performed at the most elite level of professional serving and you are the one who put all of these demands on yourself because success was so important to you. Something I think that's so important is like people do this in different variations, not just in professional sport, but people do this in different ways.
In their life all the time.
From what you've learned, and when you got to a point when you were like, my body is like I've done this to myself. I can't keep performing at this level.
What changed in you?
How did you recognize that you were just at a point where you were completely taking yourself for granted, or you kept expecting and yes, you could keep doing it, but you kept expecting an amount from yourself that was not sustainable.
What changed? Well, I won my six consecutive world title. I decided that winning six consecutive world titles meant being the most successful surfer in history. I had defined success as being the most successful surfer in history, and I defined being worthy of love as being successful, which meant being a six times consecutive world champion. So what changed was a friend of mine said, to you enough yet, And she asked her in a way where she said,
what's driving you? Do you think it's because you're adopted? And that was the first time that question had been asked in that way to me. And it's so strongly resonated with my heart it almost put a stake through it. I just went, oh, oh, my goodness, I'm still trying to prove that eight year old girl that she's enough. I'm still I'm trying to prove to the world that that little eight year old who felt so scared, so abandoned, so rejected, even though she was being reassured that she
is loved and worthy and belongs here. She has been proving to the world that until she becomes something, she'll never be enough. And the lesson that I've learned is no one can ever tell you that you're enough. No one will ever give you permission to be enough unless you do. You know, we all talk about how love comes from the self. You know what enoughness comes from the self as well. Enoughness is acceptance that where you are, who you are, what you're doing right here, right now
is more than enough. Now. I had convinced myself that myself that the only way that I could be enough was to become the most successful surfer in history. And then I got there and I went, am I enough yet? Yeah? I'm enough now? Okay, so now let's go for another one.
You know, I think exactly like what Laura just said that you did this in the sense that very few people are professional athletes that are seeking validation by getting world titles.
But I think a lot of us.
I mean, I know that for a lot of my girlfriends and I we've spent a lot of our twenties kind of figuring out.
Whether we're enough for the guy that we're dating.
And I think that when you get to that point of realization of I mean, for me, it came in my quite late twenties when I really started to unpack validation and started to unpack why do I feel as though.
I'm not enough for these people?
And I think that there's that point of our maturity perhaps where you really start to process, Actually, this might not have anything to do with not being enough for this other person. This might have a little bit to do with me and about me seeking validation in unhealthy ways. And I think for you, seems that you sought it through winning, through becoming the absolute best at say when.
I think it's even interesting that you say that, keish because I don't see this necessarily as being a token of maturity, because I think there are plenty of people who are in their fifty sixties, seventies who never reach a state of being able to self validate. I think that it's a mindset, it's you know, some people might learn it in their twenties, some people might learn it
in their fifties. I don't think that it's necessarily something that you just arrive at when you hit thirty years of age and you go, ah, now I realize I don't need to get my validation from external sources.
And to that point, I know teenagers that are enough. Yeah, I know thirteen year olds, twelve year olds, ten year olds, six year olds, that are enough.
Lane, Just speaking about your time in surfing, working in an industry that was so male dominated, What was it like at that time? And this is very much in terms of just your day to day being a professional sports athlete in an industry that women didn't really have a foothold in it yet, what was it like being a pioneer of that sport.
It was a shit show. It was a chauvinistic, sexist shit show. Yeah, the nineteen eighties, seventies, eighties and nineties and women's surfing was not a very glamorous or welcoming place to find yourself as a woman. It was really toxic. You know. We were first rejected by our male counterparts, We had no support from the industry, and the governing body really saw us as a distraction to the men.
So if you've seen that documentary called Girls Can't Surf, that's a really classic snapshot of what we were encountered, what we're up against. Like, let's cancel the women's event, put the money back into the men because we want to pay them more because they attract bigger crowds. But then we'll keep the bikini contest. It was a really toxic culture, and like it says in the film, we weren't given permission by the surf industry, of the surf
culture to be embraced by it, supported by it. So, as Catherine Fox and Kirsten Ferguson wrote in their book Womenkind, when women find themselves in an environment where they devalued, they devalue themselves and they devalue each other. And that's what women surfing look like to me in the nineties. So not only were we devalued by the industry and our male counterparts and the governing body, but then we saw every opportunity as a threat. So there were no opportunities.
Everything was a challenge, and so we dragged each other down, we pulled each other back, and we really didn't celebrate or elevate each other. And it was divide and conquer. There was no collaboration, there was no cohesion. There was very little camaraderie. And women are the minority in the majority of situations, so if we see another woman succeed, we automatically think that's one less opportunity available to us.
But at the end of the day, if I reflect on my career, every single one of us knew that when we were entering the sporting arena, when we're entering competition and well titled only one person's going to win lane.
I fucking love that quote.
I had never heard that before, but it's so I mean, and I think it's true for so many things that you've spoken about so far, Like, yes, it's relative to the sporting world, that's relative to how women interact with each other in many different industries on social media in
so many different ways. And I remember having a conversation with someone recently and the response to something that we were talking about was like, oh, well, women are the worst for it, like they're so mean to each other on social media or they're so mean in how they interact. And it is exactly what you just said. It's this idea that when we're already pitted against each other, that we turn on each other. Yeah, And I think there's so much to learn in that conversation as well.
And the advertising agencies or the advertising world in the marketing world ride off the back of that. They ride off our vulnerability, they ride off our belief that we're done enough by negatively reinforcing us to belief that we aren't enough. We're never going to be happy until we achieve this. We're not going to be deemed successful until we achieve that. We're not going to have enough money until we're able to drive that, live there, wear this,
do that. You're not pretty enough, tall enough, skinny enough, short enough, Like, no matter what you do, you're never enough.
So we're constantly reinforced to believe that. And then, like I said, if we see limited opportunity, then instead of elevating another to do it and celebrating that, we pull the push them out of the way and stomp on them and silicone the glass ceiling up and say, look, I had to do it tough, but it's worked out all right for me, So you're going to have to do it tougher because I want you to be better
than me. It's like, where's the encouragement, where's the compassion, the consideration, Like the whole reason that we've got female pioneers is to pave the way, not to close it up and seal it up and preventing the other woman from getting through there. You know, one of my major bug bears is seeing women in leadership positions making it harder for women to follow in their footsteps. Where the sign of a good teacher is when their student succeeds them.
What is the female surfing world like now?
No, it's a very very different environment.
Yeah.
Yeah, And does that make you proud because I know that you were a really monumental part in changing that narrative.
Absolutely, I'm really proud of where women's surfing is today. To say that there's still a long way to go, and I'm proud of where women's sport is today, but then there's a shit time of work still to be done to make that a better playing field for women. We all want to experience a state of equality. Whatever
that looks like and feels like, I don't know. But as long as we can keep pushing the cause and reinforcing the need to have female role models and pioneers in environments where they're paving the way for future generations. The way I like to present it is every pioneer must have the courage to plant a seed and water that seed to grow a tree that they may one
day never have the chance to sit under. And quite honestly, in my life, I never expected women's surfing to be the first surfing to be the first sport to announce pay equity. Not in my wildest dreams that I see coming. But I'm really grateful that I was a part of that narrative and drove that so hard because I was just extremely disappointed in the way in which we were treated. I mean, in nineteen years on tour, I owned a
half a million dollars in prize money. Today, Stephanie Gilmore or Tyler Wright or Sally Fitzgibbons, they can earn more in one year than I earned in nineteen So it's a completely different environment. And it's not just about the money, but they're respected, they've got an industry body supporting them, they've got a governing body who believes in them, who will actually stand up and fight for them versus fighting
against them, which is what they did to us. The men would protest that the waves had got too good for us. Back in two thousand and two, they were protesting that the waves were too good for us, and they stormed the judges tower and they asked the governing body to prevent us from being able to surf in waves that, in their eyes, were too good for us. And we stood up for the first time in a very long time and fought against that and we won that battle and we got surf that day and I
won that event. But the guys were glowing about how well we served. It's like, no, shit, sure, look it's the first time you've had a surfing decent conditions. The quality of your performance is definitely dictated to by the quality of the conditions in which you're performing in. If you're surfing in shit waves all the time, which the constant narrative is if it turns to shit, send the girls out, then of course we're always going to be depicted in that way.
But also then it's that vicious cycle of like, well, you're surfing shit waves, which people don't want to watch, so therefore the crowds aren't there, so therefore the investment and advertising. You know, I think this is like and it's a question I want to throw to you in terms of how you view women's sports across the board.
But there is this ongoing debate comes up every year and it's around, well, women's sport shouldn't be paid the same because it doesn't get the same amount of views, so therefore it doesn't get the same amount of advertising dollars. And I guess from majority of people, it's like, well, it's chicken before the egg, Like, unless the conditions are the same, the equity and the quality of the sport
won't increase. But what is your view on that when someone says to you, oh, but it doesn't get the same amount of advertising, so how could they possibly pay women the same?
Well, even in.
That conversation, this year was the first year that for the state of origin that the women were paid the same amount as the men. In Queensland, if you played for the Queensland team, you got paid the same amount. But if you played from New South Wales, the women got paid substantially less than the men. And so even within the same sport, in the same game, you've got this inequality.
Yeah, disparity, sorry of pay.
Yeah, well this is this is an issue that goes across all industry, not just sport. I mean, we see female lawyers earning less, female doctors earning less, female presenters earning less. Why is that based on gender? Is it because we allow it? I think, you know, there's an element of personal accountability and responsibility that needs to fall
on our shoulders. And look, I talked that very seriously when I was competing because my sponsors would question my motivation even after winning six consecutive all titles and threaten to drop me, whereas they're still going all out to support their male team writers. So to answer your question, I feel that it's multifaceted. I feel that there's got to be a confluence of events that needs to occur.
We can't just keep putting the onus on the industry to pay women more because women need to not so much earn it, but they need the opportunity to build themselves up to be worthy of it. Because if I look at Women's AFL, like the first couple of years, it was such a scrappy game, but that was because they didn't have the opportunity to play on the right fields.
They didn't have the support, they didn't have the coaching, they didn't have change rooms, they didn't have just the comforts to make them feel like they belonged in the game.
And they couldn't train because they weren't getting paid enough, so they had to do other jobs. You know.
There's all that.
Yes, there's a lot more to it than just money. Though there's a lot more to it, but they need to feel like they belong there. They need to be given the equal opportunity. My belief is that women do deserve to be paid equally, and that argument, especially when it comes to Grand Slams in tennis, that women only play three sets, So why do they get the same
prize money as someone that's just played five. Well, there's no guarantee that the men's winner will have to play five sets, by the way, he could win it in three. And secondly, what about the enormous amount of sacrifice and commitment and compromise that women have had to endure to get to that place and to generate that equal opportunity. We need the partners, the sponsorship to see the value
in the future of it. Sure, right now it might not be that valuable, but you have an obligation and a duty to make it more valuable than what it is. It can't just fall on the players. It has to or the participants. It's got to be a multifaceted approach. So I reckon the partners have a lot to play in it. The broadcasters give us more airtime. We need to see our role models. I mean, one of the reasons why I was so compelled to become a professional surfer. As I used to watch the Coke Class on TV.
I videotaped it and I would rewind that cassette and play it every day. Just being able to watch my role models, being able to see that on national television helped me create a story around how I can be that too. So it comes down to the partners, the broadcasters, and then ultimately the talent. Now when I say the talent, I mean the people who like me. Don't rely on either the broadcasters or the sponsors to dictate who I am.
I need to know who you are because the more I know about you, the more I want to support you. The more I connect with you, the more encouraged I'll be to come to the games to support you, to elevate you, to celebrate you, to share in your successes, to console you in your losses. To be a part of that journey is what we all want, and that's how we connect with each other. So women need to tell We need to be able to tell bigger stories, better stories, and we need to be given the same
level of opportunity to do that. As women, we need to hold each other accountable, but we also need to stand firm in who we are. We need to stand firm in our values and what we set the standards by what we allow. And I must admit I allowed way too much chauvinistic and sexist behavior to be considered normal, so much so that I still have this underlying belief
that men don't respect women in the water. I've been able to disprove that by the guys I surf with today, but I can still go back to and validate that story very quickly if I just want to go down surf a manly or narrab.
If you do go and surf a manly like, I can only imagine. I actually have surfed at manly and I picture myself paddling onto a wave, and by the time I realize that it's Lane Beachley to my co to my side, I go, there's no fucking way I'm paddling for a wave.
I am getting out of her way.
Yeah, I do get my fair share. I must admit it takes a lot to slow me down. Lane.
Life on Cut largely built off of relationships and talking about love.
We did love a bit of love. Chat here do love a bit of love.
And for anyone who doesn't know your husband equally is successful. I don't know how you guys are competitive fliers in your household.
She's like, how many trophies do you have? How many trophies does Kirk have?
I don't know because they're locked up somewhere, like he never really wanted to display them because he was worried that people would feel overwhelmed or overwawed when they walked into his presence. And I was like, let's celebrate this shit. You were the biggest fan in the world, Kirk. Come on, let's celebrate that, so that these are all pluks.
To give a little bit of context for anyone who doesn't know, Kirk, your husband of eighteen years now, eighteen nineteen years something.
Like that, twenty years this year, one of.
The most successful musicians in the world. He's one of the founding members of you Excess.
Correct, and everyone wants to marry a man that can blow a horn, and he's a great sex sophonist.
Elaine, the thing that I love and I've heard your story before about how the two of you met. This is a conversation and debate that comes up all the time on life on cart and it's whether if you don't have any instance spark with someone, Should you go on a second date?
Should you try and see if something grows?
Now I heard that when you very first met Kirk and went on a first date, there wasn't really a spark there.
There was no chemistry, no connection, there was nothing. Quite honestly, I didn't even want to go on the date. I had no interest in him whatsoever. John Stevens decided that we would be a great match, and quite honestly, I was much more attracted to John Stevens than I was goping Gilly.
John Stevens from Noiseworks again, yes, in case people don't know it, also a musician, so.
He was frontman of Noiseworks, became the front man of in Excess after they tragically lost Michael, and then they did some work with Terrence Strint Derby, and then John came along and then they've obviously reinvented themselves a couple of times since then. But John's been a great mate and a big supporter, and there's still an incredible singer and musician and performer. He decided that Kirk and I
would be a great combination. I have no idea how or why, because Kirk and I have nothing in common, and that continues to be reinforced to day about how little we have in common. But we've been together for twenty years, we've been married for since the tenth of the tenth, so twelve years. And our first date was really tenuous. And I promised John that I'd take Kirk on a date, so I literally took him ten bin bowling at yurself. We always want to start a date
with a competition, don't we who won? We won one game each.
I think it's always good to do an activity on a first date. Then that way you're not tired at talking at dinner. There's actually nothing to talk about exactly.
And so then we walked from Dyiri to dy Beachfront to go to a restaurant that friends of mine own, and the whole way Kirk decides to talk about surfing, and I was like, fuck me, really, the last thing I want to think about is and talk about is surfing. But you obviously think that's maybe the only thing I do know anything about, So okay, I'll honor this conversation. And you know, Kirk hates the sun, hates the sand,
doesn't like owner the beach. Yet we live right by one and then when we sit down at dinner, we're yawning each other's face. We're really struggling to find conversation. I go to the bathroom. I'm thinking, if there's a window, I can climb that off. I'm fucking out of here. And I'm thinking, if I've done, if I've spent enough time in here, maybe I've given him enough time to do a runner. And he's literally thinking, well, he's at the table. If I put money down, do a runner,
I think you'll care. And then he realized his car was at my house, so we couldn't do that because he doesn't really remember where I live. So I came out of the bathroom, and I must admit I was a little disappointed because he was still sitting at the table. Thought,
I gave you plenty of time. Yeah, yes, exactly what. Anyway, the owner of the restaurant's a good made of mine, and he recognized that things weren't going so well, so he sat down with us with a fresh bottle of his known as lemoncello, and that really loosened everything up, like we just let's get out, let's shake off the shackles, and let's relax into this and have a real fun
conversation and we laughed and told classic old stories. And then we walked home to my house and I was bouncing off the doors of cars, just so drunk, just square dancing all the way home. And then we get home and then I put on Monster z Inc. Because I'm so fucking romantic. I'm like, we're going to sit down and watch a kid's film?
What are we doing? What is this day?
It's just shit shows what it is? So we watch Monsters Inc. And then halfway through it, I'm thinking, Okay, surely he's sober enough now to drive home, but if he's a good kisser, I'll let him stay. So we went out of the balcony and he's still talking. I'm like, fucking just shut up and kiss me. So he kissed me. I'm like, all right, yeah, you're passed, so right, you
can stay. And so I made him sleep in his clothes and then he woke up alone in my bed because I got up at six before dark and windsurfing, and he went and he woke up went is this what I'm in for? So? Gee, she's been a bit presumptuous. Aren't you what you're going to be? For the rest of your life.
As it turns out.
Now I am assuming he wakes up most mornings and you're not in bed and he's alone.
That's nothing's changed.
No, that's changed a lot because I don't like getting up early, especially in winter. But it's too cold and all the briefcase bandits and the school kids are in the water. So I like to get up around seven, go surfing around eight to eight birdie. That way, it's a changeover briefcase Bandit's gone, the work kids gone to school, have it to myself. So yeah, we've found our mojo, We've found our routine that serves us. Really a kirks
and real cuddler. He's very, very nurturing, very affectionate, lovesy snaggles and cardles.
He's a physical touch guy.
That's definitely one of his love languages, his physical touch. Yeah, so I'm not allowed to get out of bed when it's dark unless it's absolutely necessary.
Lane, you are the founder of Awake Academy. And now, what it says on the website is that it provides self empowerment and helps people detach from fear and take control and design a life they love.
No bullshit, transformation.
Yeah, and I love this idea of detaching from fear. Why was this foundation so important to you?
So before COVID, I had decided that it was time to write another book, and I really wanted to condense all the life lessons that I've learned. So my biography is obviously it's a biography, it's you know, it's a historical reference of the things that I've been through. But it really didn't encapsulate all of the really deep, fundamental, valuable life lessons that are really applicable to our day to day lives. So I wasn't able to really incorporate
that into my book, into Beneath the Waves. So I thought it's time to write another book, and I'm going to call it Above the Waves since the first one was Beneath the Waves.
Great sequel, I see where you did that.
So I decided to put it into like a PowerPoint keynote format and I rode tested it at my next One of my next keynotes was some of the things and and a lot of it resonated a bit, you know, fell flat, and I was like, Okay, I'll just keep working on it. And then I decided that I was going to host a public workshop, and it was the first time I'd ever asked people to come and pay to hear from me, as opposed to being paid to
go and speak to others. And the self imposed the self imposter, you know, the imposter syndrome sparked up was like I'm not smart enough that I'm not deserving of this, I'm not worthy to share this information, Like is there really any value in it? Anyway? People paid, people showed up, and that gave me the confidence to believe that actually, my content is of value and is of worth and
does need to be shared. And then my girlfriend, Tess, who's now my business partner, she helped me do like a snapshot, you know how retailers do stock takes to work out what's working and what's not, get rid of stuff that isn't. She did that with me. I did a stock take on my life, like what's working, what's not? How sustainable is my current lifestyle. I'm talking about living in a well, I'm talking I'm teaching people how to
achieve sustained success, and yet it's unsustainable. And I realized I had fallen back into that fear mentality that win it all costs mentality, that ferocious tiger shark, the one that must achieve it all costs. My body was broken, my relationship with my husband was strained, but I just kept doing, doing, doing, and she went, whoa wait, wait, how sustainable is this? And I went, no, not for ari. She's like, do you want to write another book? I
said no, not really. Writing's not my jam. I've paid for a write like an editor, and I'm paying her a shit tone and she's like, ah, you sending me anything. I'm like, not, haven't written in the last two months? Like maybe we should stop doing this. You're right, I'm throwing money away. And so she said, well, what about
doing a course like building a course? I said, that lights me up, and then COVID hit and I spent the next six months in front of this little computer that I'm talking to you on, typing out a course called Own Your Truth that's housed on the Awake Academy platform to help people own their shit like wake Up, own your Shit, Trust in Love. Because a lot of us are going through life on default mode. We're living life by default. This course helps you live it by design.
So we're all about cultivating connection, growth, and happiness. In humanity, and everyone that's done this course has walked away feeling more centered, connected and confident. And that's all I really want to do. I really wanted to harness what I've learned over the last forty years turn it into a self paced online course that people can go through it their own time and their own pace and take bits from it that they can apply to make them feel
happier and healthier. It's enabled me to broaden my impact. It's enabled me to deliver such profound content without me having to be there because it's all done through video and workbook. And it's also I've been able to turn it into a corporate model where I've been able to scale it into corporate organizations and for ninety minutes a week for four weeks, I can literally transform your team and your workforce to make them feeling more sender, connected,
and confidence. So it's something I'm very proud of and something that's enabled me to be a better version of me. And it actually helped me anchor my why because we all need to know our why. It's what helps us get up, especially on the days when we don't feel like it, and my why is awakening others awakens me.
Lane, thank you so much for doing the pod today. It's been an absolute joy speaking to you. Thank you for being so open and sharing so much of your story but also so much of where you're at now. It's truly been a pleasure. And can you please tell everyone where they can find you?
Your Instagram so they can go onto Awake Academy dot com dot au. They can also find me on LinkedIn, which is Laane Beachley or Instagram Blaine Beachley or Twitter Lane Seabeachley. I think it's Twitter.
It's pretty easy to find It's what we're saying.
Oh yeah, it's really not hard to find me.
Just Google, Yeah, just google me.
You probably find my phone number, but really easy to find me. And the majority of my content is delivered through LinkedIn and Instagram, so just follow me there and then come and find me Awake Academy.
Thank you so much to your timeline.
Thank you. Girls. Love it to chat all right.
You know that we never finished an episode without our suck and our sweet, our highlight and our low light of each and every week. Producer, Keisha, you can go first, what has been you said?
You have a funny one. What has been your suck.
So my suck is that I mean you are kind of aware of it. Is that I was really sick last week and it was the first time in years that I can remember. I had been like fully knocked on my.
Ass for quite a few days. Have you had COVID yet? I don't know. I don't think so had all the symptoms that didn't test. No, don't talk about these things. I didn't test.
I just think that it would be really hard for me to live the lifestyle that I do and not have had it. So I'm assuming that I've had it and just been completely asymptomatic.
So it was a week that it like it really rattled me.
And as it turns out, I've been to the doctors and they think that I've picked up an amoeba in Indonesia.
What's an amoeba?
It's a parasite, right, Yeah, So they think that that's what's going on, and the way that they test that. And this is where the funny part comes in because it's something that I've never had to do before. And there are moments in your life where like you're really humbled by your existence, and one every time I get a perhaps there is Yeah, this is of the same level, maybe worse.
For the first time, I had to do a poop scoop.
And I had to do a eco sample, which involves you pooping onto a little leg picture like a paper bag, but they're dissolvable, so you line the toilet with this paper bag.
Mouth is wide open. I am in shock that we got here.
You go to the bathroom and then you have to get the little scoopy scoop and collect your own shit into a little tube.
And then you know what's worse, No, I don't want to.
Know, is that you have to go back to the place and you are walking around with a bag of your own until you get a pathology place and drop it off in the little collection sample plant.
Yeah reallymble humbolizing? Is that a word?
I probably not, certainly not one of those moments that I thought, Wow, no matter how how much you think you've matured and progressed in your life, no matter the successes you have, there's always a poop of scoop that can bring you back down.
No matter what.
Fame and fortune you read in life, You've still got to do your own poop scoop. Like even Beyonce she's not getting her assistant to do that.
I reckon beyond a nah, I reckon Beyonce with an amba, there'd be someone there to poop the scoop, to scoop the poop.
So that was my suck. Wow.
Can I tell you when I was in India, when I was like very young, I went to India. I've got a terrible gut problem. I ended up in hospital and I'll never forget when the guy was like, we need a sample, and I was like, you don't want that, and I did it and I handed it to him and he said, no, not a your own sample, a still sample.
And I was like, that's what we're working with. That's where we're at. Pal oh stu is the word I should have been news. That's what that is.
But it is a pretty obvious suck to my existence, not just my week.
Okay, Well, I'm very sorry that you brought home more than you bargained for from Indonesia, and I hope that you send it back very soon.
Thank you, thank you. I do she what is your sweet?
My sweet for the week is that as an amoeba is not contagious. I was allowed back out into the wild and some of my friends from high school came to Sydney for the weekend, came for one of the girl's birthdays, and we got to spend all this time together and like, they're friends that I don't really get to spend that much time with regularly, and we ended up doing some really cool stuff, like we went to some awesome restaurants and we went to the Mulan Route.
I am a sheesh. If you guys haven't seen the Mulin Rouge, I am. I was like in fucking in love. I can't even find words.
I was absolutely sick on it. Produced a Kasha not so much. She was like, Eh, take it or leave it.
No that I wouldn't say that, but but I will admit I'm a massive, massive fan of the theater.
So I've been to musicals and I loved it. See I loved it at.
A time where like throughout COVID and artists, particularly like stage performers went through the absolute ringer. And I've got a couple of friends that are in that industry, and I kind of know how hard it has been for them too, because you know, they because we got in and out of lockdown, they kind of came out and the productions were back on and then they'd be forced out of the productions again, and I know that they're really sough with people kind of being like, I can't
do this anymore, It's not sustainable enough. And so being back in the theater again was fucking great.
So what Keisha's saying is that she doesn't want to say anything negative because she wants you to all go and buy Mullin Rooge tickets. But honestly, I think just you know what, I actually would say, it wasn't the best show I've ever seen.
However, getting to go and see shows is really great.
It's like I forgot that newfound of appreciation of it because we missed out on it for so long, And so are we looking like?
There are a lot of shows on that are not as big as the Muln Route.
Speaking of shows, also, there is a live show that you should have gone book tickets to.
I think it's called Life on Cut.
Yeah, yes, it is at the cityous Atole All in Sydney, one thousand, two hundred seats. There's still some left like go by tickets. It's gonna be the best fucking show.
That'll be my speak for that week, So what is your suck?
So my suck for the week, unfortunately, also centers around Pooh, but slightly different.
So we went away for a wedding.
My mum and actually a couple of my really good friends took care of the girls. But then on the day that we were arriving back, my and my stepdad Neil, came up and they took the kids, and so there was a lot of people in a very small house. My sister and my nephew had also come over, and my niece, so there was like seven people.
Eight people. I can't get crazy.
There was a lot of people in the house, a lot of yelling, a lot of stuff happening, And I was like, can we just put the kids outside, like, put the four kids outside, just to try and bring this energy down a little bit.
So we did.
We chucked the kids outside. The energy came down and.
Shut the door, locked the door.
Unfortunately, we left the door open. That was the problem. Left the door open, pushed the kids outside. I was like, cool, the energy was coming down. Everyone was feeling better for it. The kids were coming back and forth inside and outside. Molly was making potions and then I could smell something and I was like, what the what stinks?
Something in our house stinks.
Then I realized that three of the four children had walked through dog shit and had been walking it through my house, just in and out and in and out. Ummy, looks this potion in and out.
And there was a thoroughfare of dog shit footsteps all the way down the hallway. Have you ever seen that picture that went viral of the you know, the robot vacuum that went through the dog shit. I'm picturing that but in children form, like back and forth, back and forth.
That is my idea of a horror story because so many people send it to me because I'm so obsessed with my robot vauum cleaner, which if you call me an Instagram.
Sweet, is it the sweet that you just got the robot vacuum ount to clean up where the kids?
No?
Because I see, look, it's too technical. You can't actually just set a roomba across dog shit because it won't actually clean up the dog shit or just mop up. It'll just put dog poo on the pads and then put those pads all around the house.
Ah, because it doesn't change the pads. Right, Okay, this is a lot about robot vackum. I think you know what it needs to become more intelligent. It's not up to status yet.
I agree wholeheartedly. Okay.
Most sweet for the week though, is that we went to a wedding. We went to Brisbane. We got to see all of MAT's family. There's like the best, lovely, wonderful people. I forced Matt and to dancing with me, and then I also convinced him to have sex with me, not against his will. He was very willing, just a little bit drunk, and then that was it. We had a really it was our first night ever away from the kids together. We have never ever, ever Matt and
I had a night away from the children together. There's always been one of us or the other, but never two people away from the children entirely.
How did that fit? Will you be anxious? Freeing? It was good like you felt good? Yes, I will do it again. Great, all right? You will not be putting them in my care I know ever. Anyway, guys, that is it from us.
Britt will be back on Thursday for our ask Guncut episode produce.
Akeisha, thank you.
So much for jumping in for filling in the very big boots of Brittany Hockley. I mean her feet, aren't that be but for filling in her shoes. And if you guys have loved the episode, you know where to find us. You can jump on Instagram at Life on Cut podcast, so you can join us in the Facebook discussion group, and you can also find us on TikTok because that's what we do now. We tick and we talk thirty six year old women millenniums that we are.
Do you see that meme posted which is something that we actually do do on Instagram a lot, and it said, oh for people over thirty discussing TikTok And it's a picture of the women from Golden Girls sitting around at table.
That's us talking about TikTok.
Yeah, and it's at Life on Cup podcast. We have three thy eight hundred follow us.
That's not bad.
Go join get amongst it's a pretty exclusive little collection and if you want to get tickets to the live show, you can find the details.
Where can they find it?
Keys?
They can find them in our bio and on our website.
Yes, they're on the website by for detail. Super organized. That's why that's why you've got me here.
You can find tickets to the live show on our Instagram bio or on the website and go buy tickets. It's in Sydney, it's on the twelfth of October. It's going to be so much fun and we can't wait to see you all.
And you know the drill, Tell your mom, tell you dad, tell you don't tell you this, you won't tell you dad. Hey mom, tell your
Dad, tell your dog to tell your friends and shared a love because very love that