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We hope that you enjoyed our latest and greatest guest, but now it's just us. So what's up, baby? What's up? I feel like that popped off so many new topics for us to discuss though, and now I'm like, I have so many things I want to talk to you about in the world. Honestly, I love episodes where, like, we do less interviewing on like the guest themselves, but more of like, hey, I like your energy. I feel like we resonate with your energy.
Now let's talk about controversial topics or taboo topics, because it's always nice to bring in so many different people's energies. But sometimes, like, people don't care about someone's childhood or what they did and all this stuff. Like, not always. I mean, not that people don't care, but you know what I mean? Like sometimes to know who you are on a core level. Like what drives you, what motivates you, what scares you. That type of energy is like what I love.
Yeah. And then you get to also learn how they process through things too, like we talked about so many different topics the last time. And you get to just see how somebody processes through maybe information they don't agree with or communicating their different, their different opinion and their different thought. And it gives you like a different respect and understanding of that person.
Yes, because a lot of people can, like, show you their best side on like Instagram or Facebook or like the Internet. But like, I want to know who you are when things are not puppies and rainbows, or like when you don't agree with something or when you're triggered by something. And I love to talk about spiritual topics with people because there's literally so much under the surface from what you see on someone's social media or what they portray to
the world. And like we discussed with Samantha, we would have been burned at the stake for talking about some of this shit. And I love that She was like, I know I've been burned at the stake. And like, I personally resonate with that as well. Just the fact of like, I know I have been persecuted and pushed into hiding because I constantly get that message of like come out of The Cave, you don't have to fear persecution, like come out, come out and like spread that energy and it's just a
beautiful thing. I wonder too, like how many people who are now mentors or supporters inside of like spiritual community and and talking about like taboo topics and helping like bring light to other people. I wonder how many of us did experience being silenced, being persecuted for things, and then this time or like we're all fucking coming back, we're all going to keep doing what we were doing. Like what did we contract
together? How many of us, like know each other from past like lifetimes or whatever and are like, Oh no, we're going to be going through this. Yeah. And I feel like also something that we signed up for because my ancestors are always like emphasizing, like you are safe and you are protected. And like, you don't need to worry, You need to just push forward like lead people to the golden age, like lead people
through this change. And I just feel like the more that I help awaken people, the more exempt that I am to fucking suffering or fear or any of those energies. Like, I just don't consent to it and it's not a part of my reality. And I love to help people expand. And it's like a ripple effect because there's so much under the surface at times that maybe we don't even realize that's under that surface.
And it's just kind of like, we've all known in our soul that we would come back and that the time would be available, I guess. And it is beautiful, 'cause I do feel like a lot of star seeds and a lot of people, lightworkers and just healers and witches, and everyone has came back into this dimension at this time.
And so I love whenever you hear people say, like, I'm only 30 and I've lived through like all these life events and all these life changes, whether it was like the Millennium to like, you know, 911 to like fucking COVID. And like we just went through so many, like major changes in society, like being on the cusp of like the Internet, like before the Internet, after the Internet. And so I just really, really love coming together with people and like and like shedding light
on that darkness. That is so interesting that we have lived through so many things because you're right, so many of us that are younger do feel like we have already lived all of these lifetimes and already have all of this experience and things to teach other people. Somebody on my TikTok made a video yesterday and was like I can't wait till I'm 40 so that I can be like the old Wise Crown. And I'm like, I'm 29 years old and I already feel this way.
Like I already feel like there's so much advices to give on things and dynamics to be learned and and shared. And it used to be that you were only seen as having wisdom and having had experiences if you were an older person and you were just kind of shooed to the side as being like young, dumb and ignorant if you were younger.
And there is so much more I think respect and listening to now that we have social media and you're able to share so many things that you do know and information that you do have where now we're being able to be seen as like intelligent human beings with experiences at younger ages.
And it'll be really interesting as we do get older to see if people our age nurture the people that are younger and coming up, or if it's going to be a similar thing where we're like, you haven't been through anything, you're only 20. I mean, I personally will never become like the bitter boomer.
That's like just work harder and like even though someone told me that like the house their parents live in, it's like a massive house that's worth like 500 K they were like my parents paid $38,000 for their house in the 80s, like $38,000. You cannot even go get a small sedan car for 38K in this
energy. So it's like I don't resonate with telling people how to live their experience because as a healer and as a light worker, I know that we all have soul contracts, We all have things that we personally signed up for that maybe don't make sense to other people. And I think that our generation, people between like 25 and 35 currently are here to break that mold because things are going in
a different direction. And it is authentic expression and it is elevation and it is lighting the path for others to follow. And I feel like older generations were just fucking gatekeepers. They were gatekeepers. They're Bible thumpers, you know, Especially like, I live in the Bible Bell. And you know, my Nana literally sends me a Bible every year. And I'm like, I really love you, but like, I don't need 45 Bibles at my house, you know, like, whatever.
But, you know, that's very, very common to like project limiting beliefs on the people in these older generations. So I do feel like a lot of people in our generation are, like, moving towards, like, conscious parenting and, you know, not gentle parenting and not enabling their kids, but in a sense being conscious. Like, I know my kid has these issues or these development things, and I'm going to nurture them so that they don't feel alienated or exiled or judged
because of that. Like, you know, previous generations were just, like, not even worried about mental health. They were like, oh, you've been sexually abused. Get over it. Or you've had this happen, Get over it. Or you watched your mom, you know, take shots of vodka at 9:00 AM and take you to school, get over it, You know, like there was just, like, no accountability in some of the
older generations. And I think that us being awakened and being enlightened at a young age is going to shift that. Like I know that the shift is here, whether people like that or not, whether they're going kicking or screaming or not. I think that's why so many people have throat chakra blockages too, is that they were told growing up that like, you need to be quiet. This just is what it is. Don't repeat anything that happens inside of this home. Everybody has issues.
Nobody cares about what issues you have, whatever. And that created people that don't want to ask for help. You have high egos and a lot of I think mental health things stem from that because you're constantly being told that your experience doesn't matter, that everybody has problems, just put it down and deal with it. It's the same thing as like the boys aren't supposed to cry, like man up type of mentality.
And it's like, oh, so you're just making a whole bunch of men who don't have the ability to have emotional understanding consciousness and be able to responsibly communicate and work through things. And we've talked about it before, but there are a lot of people who they don't care to recognize those patterns that they were raised with and they don't care to work on it. And so then they just keep putting that on to people inside of society and want to silence
those people and whatever. And then you go to church and you're still told the same thing. And I think I find so much safety inside of like our spiritual community because even if the people aren't quote UN quote healed and understanding that they have these certain traits, at least they're in a space where they're wanting to learn and expand and can Start learning some tips to be able to
develop on that. And I'm going forward this year with the mindset that people who do fucked up unhealed things are still learning the tips and tools that they are learning from us or learning inside of other communities. And they will one day be able to apply those and learn from the ways that they treated other people or whatever. And it just may not be their time to do it now. And that has like shifted my perspective on being frustrated or holding on to what's the fucking like a grudge.
Because it may be shocking, but I can hold the fucking grudge. And if I've seen it in you, then fuck you. But I've learned that I can see it in you. I can know that about you as in this moment, but then I can also know that you can heal. I may not ever talk to you again, but you could heal and you could do better for somebody else along the way. And you had to fuck me over in order for you to learn that lesson.
And it's fine. And I think that the moment I stopped taking other people's actions personal, that's for super big. And like I talk about the book, it's called the Four Agreements. And one of the Four Agreements is to not take things personal. And the moment that you remove, like, why is this person not treating me with respect? And you don't see that as a personal attack towards you? It shifts your whole freaking reality.
That's really difficult to do though, because you do feel like how could you not see that you are doing this thing to me and I I saw something recently that said you're not contradicting to what we're saying. It says you're not that special. People are not going out of their way to be vindictive towards you. It's just their character and
who they are. And when you sit there and you, this is something that I have, I have done and I'm working really hard on not sitting there and picking apart the situation and wondering how you don't understand my feelings and going back and forth about how I feel versus you. Whatever you waste so much energy doing that, it doesn't help anybody come into healing on situations.
It just makes you sit there and be like, well, you're an awful person because I have looked at this from every angle that I possibly can and you still done fucked up. Yeah. And I think so many people see, like other people's lack of awareness or lack of accountability as a personal attack or like you said, vindictive towards them. And I love using the term, like you don't owe me anything. Like you don't owe me respect, but I demand and require respect.
So the moment I'm not getting that, I'm just going to remove myself. Like, you don't owe that to me, but I demand and I require that. So the moment that you stop taking other people's actions personal and you just realize that you only are in control of the way you're perceiving that situation and you can let them disrupt your peace. You can be laying up in bed like, why am I not good enough? Why does this person not respect me or care about my feelings?
Or you can be like that person is projecting and reflecting how they treat themselves back to me. Because a lot of people that treat you like shit or talk to you like shit, talk to themselves like shit and beat themselves up on the inside and lay in bed all night like you're a piece of shit and you fucking suck.
So many people have negative self relationships, whether that was taught to them like you're not pretty enough, you're not skinny enough, you're not rich enough, or whether that was embedded from, you know, peers, relationships, work environments. You know, I always say that really, a lot of people stay in environments that are not conducive to their growth because it feels comfortable. And when you remove yourself, you may sit in quiet and empty
energy for quite some time. And a lot of people are like, I don't want to be an empty energy. I would rather fill it up with a bunch of shit that doesn't serve me so I can be distracted from my own accountability and my own healing. Because if you're blaming your partner or your mother or your neighbor for your unhappiness, you're never actually taking accountability for how you're playing a role in your own suffering.
And that's what I think healing and spirituality has really helped for me is it wasn't other people that made my life bad, it was me allowing those people to bring their state Gucci energy into my fucking life and bring me down. Whether it was like, hey, I've got free drugs, do you want some? Or hey, I'm having a party. Or hey XYZ. Like I was allowing that by creating an energetic relationship with that.
It's not their fault. It was my fault and I needed to realize that I was just allowing them to have space in my life. I was allowing those situations to manifest because I was allowing it. Period. Like that's just point blank period. I let it happen. And also when you're so focused on what everybody else is doing that you don't like or that's bothering you or whatever, it ends up changing the way that you treat those people and the way that your energy is around
them. So then it just keeps on festering this. I don't like what you're doing. I don't like what you're doing thing. Whereas if you were to put your energy and time into you doing what it is that you're wanting to do or communicating the way that you do regardless of that person. So many situations would like find more healing think that inside of like relationship dynamics a lot too. It'll be like, well, I don't like that they talk to me that way. And so I talk to them this way.
And so then you keep on going in these cycles of miscommunications and being disrespectful with each other. Or you know, I'm a really affectionate person and this person isn't being affectionate. So now I'm not an affectionate person. No, because that person loved that about you and that's why they're with you. They loved that you were an affectionate person. And so now you're changing something about yourself that made your dynamic work and now everything is different.
But you're going to sit there and keep on blaming the other person as being the problem. And so often we'll be like, well, this person has changed or this has changed. But people don't want to do the self reflection and the evaluation to see what areas they've changed in and how they're responsible for that dynamic shifting too.
And that's been also a big thing I've been learning and really like really working on. And that goes back into the that like 4 agreements thing of not taking things personal, like you not liking to do this thing doesn't mean that you don't like when I do it. That's me now, personalizing something that's about you and putting it on myself.
And that also ties into when we were talking a couple weeks ago about your love languages and how your love language will shift based on somebody else's love language and what they do or don't give you. And that you can mold yourself and think that, oh, this is what I like or this is what I don't like anymore. No, you're just living in a world where you're trying to make other people comfortable, whether that be your friends or your family members or, you
know, whatever. My favorite thing about relationships right now is you can feel like you're healed and that you're prosperous and that things are really shifting for you. But I have learned that a lot of the times that we feel that we're healed, it's because we're absent of triggers. Like you can feel like you have grown and you've elevated and you've really went next level. But are you just absent of triggers? Are you just isolated in your own comfort zone or in your
newfound comfort zone? And that's what I've learned recently is that I. Had taken a step back from dating, had taken a step back from mingling and going out and being around people, being around family even. And then the holidays rolls around and it's time of like, community, and it's time of healing and it's time to come together. And then you find out like, whoa, like this is still triggering me. This person is still triggering me. This situation is still triggering me.
Like, you go home and people are commenting on your weight or your sobriety or your lack of XYZ, like where's your partner, what happened with you and blah blah blah, like, you know, like, are you healed or are you just absent of triggers is a big question to ask. Because I can send all of the good vibrations out into the world and then go into an environment and instantly be brought down to their level and instantly be brought back down to where I started.
Or Ground Zero if you will. And that can be a huge wake up call, because it's like, are you healed or are you just isolated? And a lot of the times you will find that you've been isolated. You've been hanging around your new spiritual friends, or your new sober friends or your partner, or whatever, and you're
just absent of triggers. With the moment that you go into an environment that's not conducive of your healing and it's the same box that you escaped from, you're going to be brought back down to square one where you have to face the noise that maybe you're not as healed as you think you are. That's so fucking real. Also. Like the generation before us, too was still in the perfect body, perfect image that you're projecting, that you're showing
other people and whatever. And I know that like my we've talked about our grandmothers being very similar. As in the sense of, like, you wake up, you get ready, you put your makeup on, you look like you're ready for the fucking day because you never know who you're going to meet.
What's going to happen? My Nana, you know, if her house catches on fire, she'll just fucking stay in there if she doesn't have her makeup on, because there's no goddamn way that she's going to let the neighbors see her, you know, disheveled. And so growing up, there was a lot of, and I didn't realize this until a couple of years ago, but there was a lot of perfectionism that was put on
the rest of her family. A big part of that being religiously based, but a lot of it being your personal appearance. And I remember she would be like, you can be poor, but you don't have to look poor, Like you can make yourself look expensive even if you know you're not whatever. And so that was always, like really drilled into us. And I saw her also.
Your body. Like for years her and my aunts and my mom have been doing, you know, this weight loss thing and that weight loss thing and this diet thing and and whatever. And I didn't realize until a couple years ago how much that mindset had, like, been transferred onto me and how much of my personal thinking had been because of the way that their perfectionism, her perfectionism had been projected onto me. I'll never forget I she was really sick.
And so I flew down to California to go and take care of her. And she was telling me that once I get back, what did she say? Once you get back to the size that you should be your true size, I'll take you clothes shopping and we'll go and we'll get you a new wardrobe. And so I was sitting there that night and I was like, I need to lose this weight because, like, she's commenting on it. And like, I do want new clothes that, like, make me feel comfortable, whatever.
Like, I do need to lose this weight. And I felt so embarrassed that we were talking about it and that it was so like, I shouldn't go and buy new clothes for myself because I'm overweight. And it made me think of when I had first had Mac and, you know, I had AC section and stuff. So it was a little bit more difficult for me to bounce back. And she took me postpartum clothes shopping.
And she was like, you need to get leggings and big shirts because you need to hide the fact that you're very overweight right now. And I didn't think about it in the moment. I was just like, yeah, you're right, Nana. Like I need to wear a burlap sack because I am overweight right now. And that sometimes that stuff, even though it's something that like I'm working on or the other people, you know, you work on things that people have said to you and projected to you in the
back of your mind. Sometimes you're still like, is other people thinking this thing that this person is thinking about me, Whether it be your weight or whether it be you're told that you're too loud or you're too woo woo with the spirituality or, you know, you don't talk enough or you cuss too much or just whatever little thing it may be sometimes that just sits there in the back of your brain and it just picks at
you. And it is those times you're saying, like it is those moments where you know you're by yourself and you don't have a trigger going on inside of your world. And so your brain is like, what's something bad that somebody said about you so that you can work on this thing in your downtime? Yeah. And I think that a lot of children are in programmed with, like those limiting beliefs and those projections. And a lot of parents want to live vicariously through their child or very vicariously
through whoever. And, you know, for the longest I was being influenced by unhealed parts of my parents, like their fears and projections. Like my dad made a comment probably like four years ago when I started my business. And he was like, you'll never make that much money doing that. Like, you'll never make that much money. And then, you know, I look at it and I'm like, you know, when my dad retired, he's making like 40 something dollars an hour.
And now on average, I make over 100 an hour for my services. So it's like, OK, I would never make as much, but I'm making triple what you made in one hour. And you did this your whole fucking life. But I think that the moment that you don't want to be spiteful towards those people, you're really healing from those triggers. Cause instead of trying to justify or feel like I needed to be accepted by him or accepted and what I was doing, I was just like, OK, cool, I'll, I'll show
you that. Like I'll show you what I'm going to do instead of tell you instead of project that insecurity back on to you, right.
Like I was just like, OK, you can send that my way and I'll be your punching bag because you never chased your dreams and you never broke the matrix on your life and you never actually elevated and healed your insecurities, you know, But a lot of people, especially in the capitalism type society, they have been programmed to keep everyone on the same hamster wheel that they're on no matter what. And that's how the cycle stays alive, as if everyone is on the
hamster wheel. Everyone is going in the motions of life and never questioning why we're all on the same ride. That just keeps restarting. Like you never get ahead. It just restarts and restarts. And that's why I hear people say like that they don't have a savings account or that they're one, like disaster or one, you know, emergency away from being evicted. I was reading this thing and it was saying like, a single mother may bring in $1800 in a month.
Her rent is 1100. Her car payment is 180. Her insurance is 75. She's still got to have a phone bill, electric, water and food for the month, but the government says that she doesn't qualify for food stamps because she's making 1800 a month. So they basically said like, OK, on average the most her electric bill could be is like $150.00 and all that she's going to need is a bill that's 300 in one month for her to get evicted. And they were like, well, why
would she get evicted? Because in her contract lease it says that she has to have her services turned on so the moment water or electric gets shut off, she's up for eviction because she's voiding the contract that she signed when she signed her lease. So they were basically saying like even though she works for 45 hours a week and and does all these things, it doesn't really matter because working harder lost her government assistance for food.
So now she's actually behind because that 1800 plus food stamps could have really allowed her to have a little wiggle room on those bills. But basically they were saying, like in the summer, she completely turns her air off and sets in heat because she's afraid that she could end up with like a $300.00 bill and that's all it's going to take for her to get evicted. And they were like, I don't get it. And they were like, this is the reality for like 95% of single moms in America.
And you all are so worried about them getting food stamps or getting insurance or getting some type of assistance, but yet the cycle is broken because when you average out 1800 a month for the year, like that's less than $30,000. Like, it's not a lot of money, but her rent is 14,000. Of that thirty, you know what I mean? And like, I think they were saying like 1800 after taxes, but still like the more majority of this is basically saying, oh, you don't qualify, but you are one.
Like your car breaking down or needing a new tire or one electric bill from literally being evicted because of those circumstances. And like that's how broken the hamster wheel is. But there will be people that look you dead ass in your eyes when you start a business, or you start a side hustle, or you trying to make a bet on yourself and make a lateral move upward that will knock you down and tell you that that's stupid. That you're investing in the wrong thing. That it's not good.
You know, just like the 12 year olds who had Bitcoin and they bought it for $12.00 and then at four years later it's worth $40,000. Like I know someone personally who had a Bitcoin and in its peak sold it for 28 K and they were like I bought it for a couple 100 bucks when everyone else was saying it was crazy. I basically lost my ass on crypto. Like I've invested like 1000 and I think it says I have 150 U.S. dollars like I could cash out.
So I haven't done great, but I still have the the same amount of crypto I bought. So as long as you don't sell it, you don't actually lose it. But you know, the system is basically designed for your parents and grandparents to keep you influenced to stay on the hamster wheel because that's what keeps the machine going. And I always say that during COVID, the machine begins to idle.
And when things idle, they get condensation, they get water in the system, they get air bubbles in the in the pipes, in the pockets, and that's what halted the whole machine. That's why now they are really going after small businesses. Like we said earlier on another episode about how it used to be a $20,000 threshold that you didn't have to claim and now it's $600.00 because they don't give a fuck if you're having a yard sale or you sold some shit on eBay.
They want their cut because you're not going to get ahead. This machine is not going to idle on their time. You're going to get back on the machine. You're going to make it work and you're going to keep going to work and that's that's that. That's why I like so many businesses. Businesses have made people go back to the office now when that's absolutely not productive for most businesses. But they didn't like that you could do a little laundry on the clock and not be stressed 24/7.
And then now, because you were able to do a few things on the clock and still get your job done, you have time in the evening to heal, to meditate, to start a side business, to try to get out of the corporate world. And they were like, hell, no, you're going back to the office, you're going to commute 2 hours a day and you're going to sit in traffic and eat shitty food, 'cause we don't want you getting healthy. We don't want you to think you have broke free of this machine
'cause you haven't. So there's two things that I wanted to touch on. So one of them the whole like machine breaking down thing. So I don't know if you've heard about this, but in Texas they basically are saying fuck the federal government. They've kicked the federal government out of their state because of the border. So basically they're like the federal government isn't doing anything to prevent migration over the border, undocumented
migration over the border. And so Texas is like, get the fuck out of here. We're not doing that. We're not going to keep having illegal migration through our borders. And they now are discussing not paying federal taxes to the government because we're not needing you guys here. You're not doing anything for us. You're not doing anything that's
benefiting our state. And so we're going to kick you out and that's going to, if that ends up being something that passes, that's going to have such like a domino effect on other states because then all of a sudden other states are going to be like, yeah, the federal government's not doing anything for us. We're ruling ourselves. And so that's going to cause its own shift, I think as that
starts to happen. But then, and I say that because there's so many different pieces of the machine where, you know, even higher ups, like even individual states, even people leading individual states are like, y'all are fucked and we don't like the policies that you're doing and you're not looking out for the people. And we'll just take this into
our own hands. And that's where there's going to start being even more separations, I think, because you're still going to be 1 country, but you're going to have all of these individual states like governing themselves. Colorado tried doing it with making it so that you couldn't vote for Trump on their ballot and like, just removing him and saying you can't do that. And then Texas is doing that with like their border or whatever. So it'll just be interesting to
see what happens with that. I refuse to have like a fear based mentality about it. And I just, I'm like, you know what? It's going to end Like we we're already surviving through like no toilet paper. We can do anything. We lived through that. Like we can make it happen and then what you said.
About that. I want to say something about that so I don't forget if that happens, all of the government assistance, food stamps, insurance, Social Security, everything that comes from the federal government will be cut. So them states better be ready. And what will happen is those states will up their personal taxes. So it's not just going to be like we're not paying Fed taxes anymore. Everything's going to go down. No, it's going to drive everything up.
And if the government exile you because you've chose to do that, then when something does happen or there needs to be border control or you know there's a natural disaster, you're not getting FEMA, you're not getting federal aid, none of that. So that could actually not be good for some states. Texas would be fine because Texas is like its own United States. It's so fucking huge. There's more people in Texas than in like 5 other states
combined. So Texas would probably be fine, but let a small state like fucking South Carolina or somebody do that and they're going to be fucked as soon as a hurricane rolls in. Just saying. See, and that's so important to talk about too, because you see only one aspect of something and you see a solution for this one problem, but you don't think about how many different ways that's going to affect things and to what you were saying about like the single mother thing.
I also, it's always so interesting to me because I am with somebody who has like a a kid that they share right, Who like pays child support, who who like has a shared responsibility over another human. And it's so interesting to me that examples will always be given of like single mothers or them not having money or whatever. But for some reason, fathers always get kind of left out of
the equation. And the solution made by the government for women, you know, raising children or whatever, is, oh, well, we'll just make sure that the dad pays the mother money, but the father has the same amount of things and the same amount of bills and the same amount of expenses and
whatever as a mother does. So then you think about the fact that a man is working hard to be able to have all of these things too, and is maybe, you know, he also has to keep his power and and his water on or whatever, because he also has that child at his house and he needs to make sure that he's able to
provide for them. But then also there's this additional stress because, well, now I have to give her a couple $100 a month or whatever so that she can afford to keep her stuff on so that she can afford to have that done. And I always think that sending things through the government for controlling things for you, like making sure that like, you're getting financed from somebody or whatever. To me it's always been such, it always seems like such a
disservice to the kid. Whereas if you were like, hey, if this parent wants to be involved and they want to contribute, they're going to. If they don't want to be involved and they don't want to contribute, then don't have that fucking parent involved. Because if you don't have that other parent involved because they're not wanting to, you qualify for different things, for different helps, for different aids, different ways to help.
But if you're forcing somebody who is trying to be a partner in raising a human being, you force them to give out of their pocket. They actually can only provide less for the kid. And I just, I I think that whether it because there are mothers who receive child support, their fathers who receive child support, you know,
whatever. And I've always thought it was such a fucking disservice for the government to allot a certain amount of money that you have to pay so that you're then struggling for you to be able to provide anything when they're with you because you've given it all to this other this other person. And but also this is just a little thing. I think that parents calling themselves single parents when they're not actually you're not a single parent. You are a parent who is single.
Like there's a difference between being a single parent and having absolutely nobody that helps you with anything and everything is on your shoulders. You do everything a fucking loan. There is nobody who is backup. There is nobody who wants to help you who wants to be involved. That is very different than you have broken up with somebody and this child has another parental unit that is inside of their life that cares for them. If something happens to you, this person will jump in.
That is so fucking different than saying that you're a single parent. And that is just a tangent all on its own. Thank you for listening to my Ted talk. I honestly. Grew up in a split household. My mom had child support from my dad, and a lot of my limiting beliefs around money was because
of them arguing over money. Because even though my dad would pay child support, my mom would still be like she needs school clothes or she needs this or she needs that or he always like covered insurance on me. So at a very young age, my dad always made it very clear, like I paid for your braces and I paid for this and I did these things. And it was very, very detrimental to my development in my home. Because not only was I in a split household where people didn't like each other, I then
had to hear about finances. I then had to hear, well, I bought that for you and I did that for you. Not her, not him. I did that. And just like the facts is if a kid is literally 16 years or less, you should not be letting them know about child support or food stamps or any of that, because it basically makes them feel like a burden no matter who it's coming from. Because we didn't ask to be birthed into your fucking life.
Like I didn't ask to be brought in and like my parents had me at like 26 and 27, so they still didn't have a good grip on their own reality, even though back then my dad bought a house for fucking $50,000 or whatever, you know what I mean? So it's like they still, no matter what the government said, fought over fucking money. And I just think that if you're going to have a kid, so last thing you should do is involve the government. Like you should be civil and
grown enough to work it out. Like I'm going to buy school clothes in the fall and you buy them in the spring or I'm going to pay for this. I will carry insurance on them and you provide for their food or whatever it is. Or let's split custody and I get them this amount of time and you get them this amount of time. And whatever we do for them in those split times is what we do for them. I'm not giving you money. You're not giving me money.
But in my opinion, a lot of people are not mature enough. A lot of people think children are just a tax deductible write off. And I've made that joke before, like I need a kid to deduct off my taxes. Like that would really help me. But it's fucked up that, like, single people like me who go to work, bust my ass, don't use public schools, don't get government assistance, never had government insurance, get fucked on my taxes because I don't have
a kid. And it's like that kid would be utilizing all these resources that I'm paying for regardless. Why do I have to pay more? Because I don't have one? Like, it's a broken cycle and the government keeps people having kids they can't afford because of the broken cycle. Like, a lot of people don't have the capacity to have more than one child and yet they have four or five. Like, a girl I went to high school with just posted that she's pregnant with her boyfriend who literally just got
out of prison. This dude looks like a fucking crackhead. And this was like, one of my best friends growing up. And I sent the picture to my mom and my dad and they were like, that guy's on meth. Like, that guy does meth. And I'm like, you can tell, like, she's over here. Like, I'm 20 weeks pregnant and I didn't even know. Yeah, 'cause when you do drugs and shit, bitch, you don't gain weight. Like, yeah, we know why you didn't know.
Because when you do drugs, your period's fucked up anyways. But it's like people like her, who already have several kids they've lost custody of, are now having another one. And that's OK That's endorsed. That's check the box for the machine and it just bothers me because the more kids you grow up in a broken cycle, the more kids you get on the hamster wheel and do the same dumb shit and repeat the cycle. But it's like they don't educate people on Co parenting.
They don't educate people because like we said earlier, in the previous times, it was sit down and shut up. I don't care if your grandpa raped you. Sit down, shut up. Don't tell anyone. Keep that in the home or whatever. And that's just so fucked up. Like, our generation's the first generation to really address mental health. But there's two ends of that spectrum, one side hella on drugs and the other side trying to heal. And it's like constant, like trying to figure that out.
And you know, I just personally believe that they should put a program, and I'm not saying force people to be sterilized, but I'm saying give people money, whether it's 10 or $15,000. If you want to get a vasectomy or you want to get a hysterectomy, why not endorse that? Because I promise you there would be a bunch of 20 year olds. Obviously it would be 18 and older, but there would be all kinds of 20 year olds that would be like, you know what I could
do? I could do this, Get 15,000, invest that into school, and make something of myself. Not utilize government assistance. Not utilize public education. Not utilize all these resources that other people may need more than me and fucking break the cycle. Yes. So when you go in, I think it's if you're under 30, if you go in for a vasectomy or a hysterectomy, they won't give it to you because they say that you're too young to like make that decision yourself. It ends up, I won't say they
won't give it to you. It's extremely difficult for you to get, especially for insurance to cover it because they say that you're too young to make that choice for your body at that time. Like it can be irreversible or
whatever. And I think that if somebody is of legal age telling you what they want to do with their body, let them do it. But that goes into the whole like women don't get autonomy over their body in so many places now because it's the government's fucking business whether or not you decide to keep a child for XY and Z reasons. But why don't you go ahead and put it into the system so that it can be abused in foster care?
You can get me started on that and going back to what you were saying about like when you were growing up and you know, your parents being like you know, I I have, you know, I I do your insurance, whatever. When it comes to child support, I have learned this. Unfortunately, even if you are providing health insurance, whatever, that's not something that's considered when it comes into you paying child support.
So that's an additional cost that comes out of your check that is not considered as you providing financially for the kid. Even though your insurance costs, you know $700,000 a month or whatever, that is not counted as you providing anything for that child, which I think has
just been fucking crazy. And that's why so many people will put their children on government insurance and will make under the threshold and and it creates this population of people who they're not ever going to work harder for anything. Because when you work harder you have to pay more and it's not seen that you know you're you're paying all this money for insurance or whatever and that's
coming out of your check. Now you've additionally got the Child Support or whatever that comes out of your check too. And so and it financially makes more sense for you to not work hard and for you to make under this certain amount of money and be in poverty and have all of these government assistances. Because then you're actually able to provide to your children in a way that you can't. Because even if you have that insurance, you have deductibles and co-pays.
So you may have an insurance plan that you pay. You know, let's say you pay $1000 a month for this insurance plan. That's just for you to be able to say that you have insurance. Now when you go to the doctor's office, you still have to pay, you know, 35 to $50.00 for a normal plan in order to see the doctor. Then you have your co-pay when you go to the pharmacy and you have to pick up the medication. So you're, you know, $150.00 or
whatever in the hole there. Plus now you have an out of pocket maximum, so your insurance isn't even going to pay above 20% for you until you've met this, you know, 10 to $20,000 out of pocket that you're required to meet in order for insurance to do anything. And so it's, you know, a system that's in so many ways designed to keep you limited and and to
keep you down. And unfortunately, people don't always have the ability to see things as this is a temporary thing when you're living inside of it. So you're not able to see I'm doing this and I'm struggling through this or whatever for the next five years because my kid is 13. And when they're 18, they won't be, you know, I I won't be in this struggle because then they're going to start being responsible to to figure these things out for themselves. And so they don't.
You're not spending your energy teaching your kids how to navigate the system and how to get your own insurance and the importance of that and how to pick an insurance plan and do these things. Because you're so stressed out in the moment and putting yourself down and into poverty so that you can have this certain way of life. And so that you don't have to struggle so much.
And so then you keep that generational struggle going instead of showing them that even though there is, that this isn't easy and that it's a really difficult path, that you keep on fucking doing it and you keep working and whatever, because eventually you will overcome that. And that's like a, I think an instant gratification thing.
Like it, it solves the problem in the moment, but it doesn't solve a problem later on. Because when you're putting yourself down in order to be able to have, like the government assistances or whatever it may be, then when your kid is grown up and now you're not having to do that, now you don't have a retirement, now you don't have a savings, now you don't have this and that.
You didn't think about that because you were so programmed in the moment to make sure that your kid had free healthcare. And to add to that, I think there should be a fucking limitation to how many kids can be on government assistance. Like healthcare, food. I think like over over two kids, baby. I don't know what to tell you. You know like I'm just saying like I know it's not the child's fault but also the system endorses have more kids and will
give you more food stamps. And then I recently saw on my Facebook this girl posted her refrigerator that was like full and she was like shout out to my client for the stamps. So your client came and got her eyelashes done, which is $150.00 and fucking gave you probably $300.00 of food stamps cause. Which is fraud. As much food as she had in that fridge, it was more than $150.00.
Or she may be traded the whole month for the fill in and the the upkeep because you can't just go get your eyelashes done and not keep that up. It's the same thing with like nails and whatever. So like that's where the shit really blows me off the fucking ledge that I just want to scream. Because that girl probably has three kids who are suffering so she can have eyelashes.
And I know there's a TikTok that floats around every Christmas where the girl has long ass nails and she's like crying and like wiping her face and she's like, I just don't know how I'm going to provide for my kids for Christmas. And someone said show them your nails, they'll understand. And that's true. Like, I have no fucking sympathy for people who milk the system to their benefit. Yes, I think food stamps, I think government healthcare.
I think some of those programs are necessary, and I think that after three years of being on them, you should be cut the fuck off. Because there should be an incentive to grow and to elevate and then to pay back in to the system that you're taking from that you're robbing, basically. Because when you're out here trading them for eyelashes and fucking shoes and shit like that, that's a problem for me.
And I have less and less sympathy for people who have two 3-4 kids and don't try to break that cycle because they're perpetuating the cycle. They're teaching the cycle. Like, I understand, like, Oh my gosh, I'm 19, I'm pregnant. I don't know what I'm going to do.
I need to figure this out. But if the incentive is to wait until you're 21 and just have another kid so you can get more, and then by 23 and 25 you've got more, and then you marry a guy that comes out of prison who doesn't have anything anyways, and you keep that cycle going, It's just like, it disgusts me. And a lot of people are taught that from their mom and their grandparents and whoever. And I don't think food stamps
itself is the problem. I think there's no limitation to it. Whether you have 4 kids or 14 kids, they just keep giving you more. And that's the problem because now I know if I have another kid, I get an extra $500 a month that I can sell and go get my eyelashes done and go get my nails done and whatever. And that's what bothers me. I grew up in a A1 sided household where we did get government assistance at times.
So I look at all the money I pay in now as the karma from us taking from that system and I'm so cool to give that money back. I went to public schools like I've utilized the system. I've been on an Angel tree like I've received things throughout my life, and you know, I see the balance in giving back to that system. But at the same fucking time, there is no incentive to break that cycle. Like you said, there's just none. The incentive is do your own thing and you get screwed and
you get cut off. And whereas, like that story I gave about bringing home 1800 seems like a lot. But technically, if she brought home 15 instead she'd get $700 in food stamps. So now she's technically behind. And I just don't like it. I just don't like the broken cycle. That's like, my biggest thing is that I always knew I wanted a kid, but I wanted to wait until I was 1000 financially dependent, where I never would have to introduce my kid to that cycle.
Because I grew up in that cycle. I grew up with parents fighting over money. And that's why I know that all of this healing and all of this transformation has helped me break that, that I will never promote that fucking cycle. If you can't afford it, you don't get it. You don't get to be entitled. If you can't afford eyelashes or nails or to get your hair done, you don't get to get it. It's not oh, I'll just make it happen.
No, you don't get to get it. And I think that the Internet creates this illusion that this shit is OK and it's not. It's never going to be OK. I'm never going to be OK with it. And I think we should pull our card. I pulled our card a minute ago and on that topic too, I wanted. I before we like switch gears, I wanted to say that it's something that like I as a parent, I'm so familiar with like this dynamic.
Because when we when we lived in California, there was a time when we had to like go to a food bank and I had to get like government assistance. Because where we lived in California was on top of. We lived in the mountains and we would get hit with like crazy snowstorms and we had like 2 weeks where we didn't have any power and we literally had to spend like hundreds of dollars on gas for a generator in order to like heat space heaters in our house or whatever.
And I remember I had to like go down to the food bank and I had to use like government like assistance and stuff because all of the money that we had had we had to use on literally running space heaters, running a generator. And so there are times when like utilizing these things is super helpful and you know you're you're doing everything that you can and that's why it's an assistance. It's supposed to assist you. It's not supposed to support you. It's not government support.
It's government assistance. And you know in in the parenting dynamic you're you're so right about like conversations that you know can happen with kids or whatever. And and my husband and I have worked really hard on that. We've battled really hard on that because, you know, on the I'm going to try and say what I want to say without giving like too much personal information, 'cause I don't want to like
shame anybody. But on on our end, we've worked really hard to provide without having to have the assistance. And so we're really, you know, careful with our money. And like I don't, we don't go on trips and we don't go and do all of these other things because it's important for us to make sure that like we can have sustainable life for our kids
and everything we don't. That's something important to us. And so that's how we've utilized our money is we are going to get health insurance and we are going to get groceries and we're going to do these other things. And I'm not going to have my nails done and I'm going to color my own hair and I'm going to do all these things that we can make sure they're provided for in these ways. And for my daughter, her experience with her mother is very different. Where it's it's the opposite.
It's I'm going to have assistance for everything so that the money that I have coming in, we can go on trips and we can go and we can do these things. And so she's always traveling. She's always buying her something new. She's always, you know, paying for experiences or whatever. And so for a for a lot of years, I would have this like, resentment or this grudge where I'm like, you look like you're doing better and you're able to
provide all of these things. And it's because you're so irresponsible with your finances. And I would get angry because I'm like, why are we paying child support that you're using so that you can buy sushi and everything else and not actually, like, spend it on her. And I had to really work on breaking from that mindset and being like I can't control how somebody else is utilizing their finances or what is financial responsibility to them and what
is important to them. All that we can do is do our best to make sure that there's a different example when she's here. And so when she's younger, I felt like there was so much more conversation about how do I say that. I feel like there was like, well, we, we choose not to spend our money on that type of energy. As opposed to the last couple of years where now, you know, when she talks about, well, how come we don't do this or we don't do that?
We're like, oh, because we're saving for a house because we're doing this? Because to us this is, this is what our goals are. This is what a priority is. And leaving her mother completely out of the equation when there's conversations. Because what she's doing, it doesn't fucking matter. What the other parent is doing has zero to do with what we're doing. It doesn't play into why we do things, how we do things.
This is just what our goals are. And so then when she's 11 right now, right, So now you pay attention to the thing going on trips and going to fancy restaurants and doing all these experiences and whatever. But as she's an adult, she's going to be able to see, I didn't have those things with mom and dad over here because they were always working on being able to buy a house and being able to do these things.
And as she's an adult, she's going to see that, you know, and one side of things is a homeowner and has been in a stable, committed relationship all this time and hasn't, you know, flip-flopped and done all these things and we can get so caught up in trying to. Prove why we're doing better and and have to put somebody else out in order to do that.
Or we can just keep on our grind and doing what we're doing and we can show through our actions instead of having to put somebody else down to make ourselves feel better. And I think that's the responsibility that parents have is maybe you are frustrated and overwhelmed inside of situations or whatever, but it's teaching your your kids different ways of viewing that and navigating through that instead of forcing
those thoughts and whatever on your kids. 1000% and growing up as an only child, I never want to put my kid through the this or that. They're wrong. I'm right energy. So I respect that because a lot of parents do that. Like my dad always made my mom the bad guy always said that the Child Support he sent her was for beer money or for bingo money. And like to insinuate my mom is using her child support to gamble and drink wasn't healthy because I never went without.
It wasn't like I didn't have food or didn't have nice stuff. I mean, my mom maxed out credit cards and got me anything I wanted. But again, that was not realistic. Like, how are we getting food stamps and government assistance? And meanwhile you're only like developing this connection with money based on what the government is giving you because you're able to spend all your extra on whatever. So all the money that her husband made, they never were
legally married. They were just married by law after a certain point. Because if they did get legally married, she lose all that assistance. And I know people nowadays, which it really bothers me to know that you're in A2 come income household with your partner, but you're not getting legally married. So you can keep your government assistance and insurance. And there's a girl that I know personally, It's a friend of a friend. They had a wedding.
They had a honeymoon. They had a fucking bridal party. They had a huge ass wedding. Not just like a ceremony, they had a huge ass wedding, but did not get legally married because they didn't want her to lose her food stamps and government assistance. Which is taking away from a single mom who literally is single with no support because the dad is dead or on drugs or wherever. They're getting denied and having to work hard, meanwhile leaving their kids with people who are abusing them or
whatever. And here we are. You are in a 2 income household with your fucking partner that has these two children with you, but yet you're not legally married because you want to act like he's not in the picture. That's fucking fraud. And I think that women should be able to be sued and put in jail for that in my opinion. Because why the fuck are you taking government assistance when technically if you put his income into the equation, you
would not qualify? Well, and it isn't, It is insurance fraud or not insurance fraud, but it is, it is benefit fraud. Like if you have the situation that you said where she got her nails done and she bought groceries or whatever, it that is fraud. And when you get food stamps, they tell you that you're not allowed to do that. Like you not only can you get arrested, but you can have to pay all of that money back.
It's basically the same thing as like evading your taxes where like you're lying on government forms. You're saying because you have to do like your your income, your all this stuff like where you're where the benefits are going and all types of shit and you are not allowed to trade your benefits. You're not allowed to do any of that. You're And if you're getting them, then I don't know if you actually need them and then you're trading them. That's fucked.
But it's even more fucked to not need them and be getting them anyways, just so that you can give them to somebody else who clearly the money would have benefited this person, right? So, like, anyways, let me read this card because we could talk about this all day and we've already been here for an hour. The card is Psycho Pump. It's card number 41. It's got a disco ball. The sign is Aquarius, the Gift is clairvoyance and the Shadow is fantasyland.
The Gift level is truly mystical and otherworldly and higher frequency states you are able to tune into a sort of psychic genius transcendent of time. It is through this channel that you can sense or anticipate an emerging way forward for the collective based on your particular set of circumstances. Your code for the future will be uniquely applied to your specific lens of experience. This is precious and a rare gift that increases in clarity as your consciousness expands.
Your shadow is fantasyland and a lower frequency. This comes up as a pure hope and lust for the future. It's the image of a dream in your mind, which doesn't seem so bad after all, but deviates into the shadowy corridor when it only stays in the mind. That is when the dream does not outwardly come to fruition, but takes up a real estate in your brain space. Dreams are lovely.
Never stop dreaming, but also make sure to capitalize on your wildest fantasies and allow for their real and tangible actualization. In contrast, the overemphasis of this shadow leads to too much action and eventual burnout. Your themes are psychic powers, forward thinking, and clarity. I love the cards that we pull. It never seems like we pull the same one either. And I love that. And I think that, you know, we can have our opinions about things and we can tell you all how we feel.
But ultimately, it's up to you to decide what what resonates with you and what doesn't resonate with you, which is what We always encourage everyone to use their intuition to focus on what resonates with them. But if you look at it from its core value, you may find that what you've been taught, what you've been told, and what you've consented to actually isn't resonant with, like, the true value of what you feel. So never be afraid to be like, you know what?
I've done that and I I need to re evaluate what I believe and take accountability. Like we're not judging people, but we're encouraging you to be introspective of yourself and your family and the dynamics that you've been brought up in. Because if we all, Aquarius is the collective and we're in the age of Aquarius, if we all can collectively look at this and be
like this is fucking wrong. This is wrong for me to have 72 children and have the government pay for them and then I neglect them because I'm out here trading my food stamps for eyelashes, like and then for the girl to brag about it. I almost wanted to write that girl and be like that's illegal, but I didn't want to be that person because I try to just stay in the lane and let people do their own thing.
But definitely, definitely recommend everyone to explore things from their own perspective, but also know when to look around and be like yo. Just because I've always done this doesn't mean it's right, doesn't mean that it's wrong, but it does mean that you should re evaluate why you do what you do. Yeah.
And also too, like, we never expect people to have the same opinions that we do either just because like we share strong opinions or strong stances on certain things from our perspectives and things that we've personally experienced doesn't mean that we're expecting that everybody's going to have the same mindset on things either.
And I think that a part of the like growth journey is hearing topics that can be triggering or cause you to be frustrated because then you're actually thinking things through.
And if this episode or other episodes that we have because we constantly have new people coming into our rotation, if you hear topics like this and you feel triggered about it, you should be having inner dialogue with yourself and you should be figuring out why is that frustrating to you And then thinking how you can take self accountability inside of a
situation. And maybe nothing changes because as you evaluate you're like, no, I'm doing the highest sense of good for me. This makes total sense to me. But at least be aware and be conscious and be making choices because you have thought through and heard all of the different opinions and viewpoints on it, and this is the conclusion that
you've come to from that. If you're like, Nah, I've been fucking the system and I want to keep fucking the system even after hearing them, that's your fucking prerogative and your place to do so. But don't be mad at us because we discussed it and we bring a topic to light and we, you know, share different vantage points on it.
I think that's our role as healers, as mentors, as breaking cycles is just like that card last week when we pulled Rebellion. It is about talking about these controversial things and bringing things to light that maybe don't usually get discussed or or people don't want to discuss because there is cancel culture and there is well, you hurt somebody's feelings because you said you know what your personal experience was. And unfortunately, motherfuckers, you can't cancel
our podcast. Suck on that. And also, I'm not saying anything to try to hurt people's feelings or like target people. But when I see something that's wrong, that's affecting a child who has a little to no say in the situation, I'm going to air it out every time. Because I've been that child. And it creates trauma and it creates fucking just crazy energy within that child. To think like, wow, my parents are fighting over me at tax time. Like my parents used to do that
at tax time. Like one time my dad, it was his year to claim me and like, he went and claimed, and then my mom filed like an amendment and then claimed me on hers and my dad had to, like pay all this extra money back in. And, I mean, it was just like a hot fucking mess. Like the agreement was verbal and so clearly, like, it wasn't in stone. But you know, I grew up in that environment and I broke that cycle myself.
And I know it's possible and I know it's possible to get out of those cycles that you have been placed into. And it's not like it's not treating yourself like a victim, but it's like realizing that maybe you have been put into a victim mindset. Yeah, 1000%, yeah, I I completely agree with everything that you're saying. I think this was a really important episode for us to have and topic for us to discuss for sure. So we will see you all next time in Candy Land. Bye. Bye.