Wedding gift advice and the three month countdown checklist!

Hey, hey,

hello.

how are we?

I'm good, thanks. How are you?

Yeah, I'm good. We're, We're, we're, on tenterhooks. We're trying to do this with a sleeping baby.

I'm on the edge of my seat

She literally is.

to jump up.

If Hayley's tense today, that's why.

Yeah. This is it. Normally my husband's looking after her

Yeah,

record, but today we've gone rogue.

we've gone rogue. Should we get started and then power through?

Yeah.

Hi, I'm Hannah,

And I'm Hayley.

we are your wedding planning experts!

Here to spill the tea on the inside of wedding planning and everything that goes with it.

Expect our honest opinions, the real juice on what happens on a wedding day,

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and also just a chat between friends.

And of course, make sure you hit that subscribe button.

And let's get you wed! I

Do you know what? I can't believe how many episodes we've done now as looking at

know,

other day. But this is episode 18.

yeah.

it's like, how quick has that gone?

I know, it's not, and come on Apple Podcasts. I don't ever look at any others but Apple Podcasts, we need to be at the top because there's not many other wedding planning podcasts that do every single week. Like they'll do like seasons or they do like one offs. Like we're, we're, we're dedicated to this.

Yeah, we are. We're like, powering through.

yeah,

here. There's no seasons. Just

What are we talking about? I mean, we'll see how we feel.

tea every week.

see how we feel about that in the summer. But No,

god.

is to The thing is, I always feel like we set a good time to do it because like, we generally do a Monday. There's never really weddings on Mondays. It's normally a day like you're recovering from weddings. So it's all good. We're, we're all good. We've set it so we can continue it for the, in the long haul, you know?

us. Yeah,

Yeah. So how are you anyway?

Yeah, I'm good. Thank you.

Good. Oh yeah,

actually. Obviously first Mother's Day was, yes,

sorry, I forgot about that. Happy first Mother's Day.

thank you.

Oh

It was nice to be on the other end of it because

yeah, of

doing flowers and delivering to other people so

course.

it's actually been really nice to receive. I didn't receive flowers

Did you know? No.

mean, people never buy me flowers because

Which, yeah, would you want to receive flowers?

I would

again, because I suppose you like flowers, don't you? That's why you do your job.

Mother in law bought me some nice irises,

Ah, cute.

So that was very nice of her.

I was with my mum the other day, and we were walking around this National Trust site, and my mum was, like, pointing at these flowers, like, Oh, that's a blah blah, and that's a blah blah. I'm like, talking to the wrong gal, mum, I ain't got a clue.

Oh

Hayley told me that. Hayley told me that.

yes.

I recognize them. Yeah

Oh yeah. So it was nice anyway, just to celebrate

Yeah.

and it was an international women's day was on

Oh, yes, it was

or the Friday, so that was

Yeah, I put up a little post. I'll put a picture of us on there. You know, the women.

nice to get out of women. Well, there's lots of

Getting involved.

and,

there is.

of women that are powering through. getting it done.

Yeah, we work with a lot of women, don't we? Because it's mainly, let's face it, the bride does the main contact when we're doing heterosexual weddings. So, yeah. We mainly speak with women.

exactly. What's the word? Breaking I want to say breaking boundaries.

Breaking boundaries. I

the

like the wedding. Although has it? Because I actually, I think back to when I first started, I suppose wedding coordination, that's what I did in venues, that was very much female led. But photographers were normally male, and there's a lot of female, I'd say, I'd say our work were probably more female than male photographers now.

I've never Female DJ at a wedding, you know?

good point. Oh, I have.

I haven't ever, to

But very minimal, and I've got a wedding this year in July it's actually an Asian wedding and they have a female DJ and the company that I've booked, actually, these guys are amazing, right? So they're an Indian wed DJ company and like, they do like, you know, the doll players and so a bit more like Indian kind of entertainment as well, dancers and stuff, but every single person that they provide is female, so they're only females that work at that company. I thought that was really cool.

that is really cool.

yeah, all female. Because I think the Asian market is very male dominated. So I don't know if that's why. I need to have a chat with them about, you know, what made that decision. But I'm wondering if that's why, because it's quite male dominated. Yeah, but chefs and stuff, you see quite a few more women now. But you used to be all male. Yeah, there's quite a few roles now that you're starting to see. Florists have obviously always really been female, but there are a lot of males.

of male fema male females.

Male or females?

a lot of male florists

Yeah,

though. I mean, more, I mean, I'm just speaking generally, but I think more in London,

yes.

I

Yeah, that's probably right. Yeah.

sort of this, up

Yeah, because actually in Northamptonshire, I don't know any male florists. Oh, no, I do know one. I know one.

I think I know who you mean, but yeah, it

Yeah,

tends to be, I mean I'm not going

mostly female. No.

You know,

We love it.

girl power.

anything else other than being baby baby

baby brain

baby brained?

I have actually, I've been doing some more, I had some more inquiries for weddings this year again, in August.

Nice. Whoa,

many people are come in. Well, actually I had another one in May, you know, I was like, ah, because I think I've said the other

no.

someone had asked me that about one in May, and it's all in this same week. And I was like, and again, I got another one, I had to turn it down. But

Yeah, because flowers isn't really something you think of last minute. Like, there's a lot of things, I think, like for me, when I do on the day coordination, we are sometimes a last minute, like, you know, some people book us in advance, and some people are like, I've suddenly thought, like, and I'm panicking about this, like, how, you know, but flowers is kind of like a standard thing, isn't it? It's like, venue, food, photographer, flowers.

yeah, so if you're thinking about, like, how your venue's gonna look, how you would decorate, generally flowers comes under that sort of

Yeah.

so yeah, it is a

it's like,

really, but,

a budget thing, and people are like, You know, I'll, I'll have it if I can afford, I don't know.

people aren't So bothered about flowers as in they're not like they don't see

the tables.

So

Yeah.

happens is like they might have a conversation with like their family or that generally like the mother in law or their mom Or something and they were like, oh you sorted your flowers and they were like no yet or not really thought about it and it'll be that conversation that kind of gets the ball rolling I tend to find with that

Yeah.

And it can be down on their priorities list

yeah, true. Or I feel like it could be that they aren't having like flowers on their centrepieces. So they only really need bridal stuff. So,

Yeah, and

that you can leave.

a,

Yeah.

touch with me in a couple of days I'll probably be able to sort something out. Don't do

Yeah.

That's not very

No, don't, don't do that. Or it could be that they're thinking of going dried and then they actually see the prices and see, they think, oh, going like dried is just as cheap, but it's really not.

it's not. Oh my god. And can I just say people that think having, and you know what? You can't blame people because I think it's, again, we were talking about like these blogs that post incorrect

Yep.

the other week. it's the same thing. So they, along the line it got sort of like The news got spread that if you have mainly foliage, it means your flowers are

Yes.

Now, I can tell you there are some stems of foliage. Generally, either the same or more money than a stem of a flower.

Yeah.

absolutely is not cheaper to have more foliage

No.

actually, you, yeah, you

It's the same price.

to fill a hole.

Yeah, and also, it's still gotta be grown, isn't it? Like,

Because someone will be like, oh, well I want more foliage and flower, so obviously it's going to be less. And I'm like, no,

No.

wrong, it's

Yeah.

so,

What's the cheapest foliage? Eucalyptus.

no, eucalyptus is one of the more expensive

Is it?

Yeah, yeah, definitely,

surprised about that.

Cheapest foliages, well, you can get, there's a foliage called salau, which is like, it sounds really weird. It's one of the first foliages I learned how to like the Latin name. It's

very nice.

But, it's gultheria shalon or shalom

Oh,

and I

fair.

Yeah, that's the

That sounds weird. Shalom.

Shalon. But it's It's SALs it's common name. Yeah. Yeah, because if you don't know of florists out there, will that flowers that you obviously, like I wrote rose is not a good example, but something like that is like It actually has a long Latin name, which is

I've seen that.

call it.

Kate. When you buy a plant, it's got it on it as well, isn't it?

Latin names. So when you do, so, like obviously I went to college, I'd done all my qualifications. You have to learn

What

the Latin names.

don't.

a li from lists. Yeah. Yeah. And

Why, why do they do that?

examined on it. examined, that's not even a word. I, as

Tested!

I was like,

The baby brain is in full swing.

I got examined on it.

We should put a disclaimer in. Disclaimer, Hayley has baby brain.

Oh my gosh.

Okay, well, shalom, for anyone that wants to know, that long winded answer is whatever the hell it is.

Ruscus isn't bad. Ruscus is a firm favourite. If you want something Basically,

Ruscus. I need to Google all these.

soft Ruscus, hard Ruscus.

Ah,

many things.

yeah,

if I'm sending a

Google and Ruscus.

that. I'm just going to put

Oh yeah. I like Ruscus. I like Ruscus a lot actually.

you get soft ruscus. That's the one that's like a vine. It's like a

Yes. Yeah.

ruscus.

A lot of people have that down, like the centers of the tables, don't they? When they're having, yes.

it's good for garlanding.

Yeah.

sort of

Garlanding. There you go. People

but yeah,

little tip foil,

little tip there. Well, go out and forage your foliage if you think it's going to be cheaper and then

Oh, no.

do it

Oh, long.

joking,

And you think something, oh, this will be nice and it smells like piss.

yeah,

I did that before. I made some wreaths once when I lived on the canal and I was like, oh, it was during COVID. And I was like, oh, I'm going to make a wreath. And like,

Oh,

probably died in like a week.

oh no,

Yeah.

very good.

Yeah. Bad times. It definitely went shalom, though.

Anyway, so that was my long winded answer, but how's your week

Yeah, it's been good. Yeah busy, busy, still in the abbey. And I actually had a weekend off, which was lovely. I think we forget, don't we, like, when we're working, how Lovely it is to have a weekend off. Because no one replies on a Saturday. Like, suppliers and stuff, like, no one replies. So you can completely clear your inbox. Obviously, and then you still, I still get messages from my couples. because that's when they're out of work, which is fair enough.

to stay in just stay in and have a night

I love it.

get a take away watch TV like

It's great.

beat it.

No.

me wrong I love going out and up, but I mean I've not been out

No, I'm not going out.

like those Yeah, those days are kind of gone a little bit at the moment for me, but,

Yeah, I feel like it's just because I work so many Saturdays. Maybe that feels like I'm out already, I don't know. But I just like to be at home.

it's just

Getting stuff done.

and just

Yeah.

completely zone out and not worry about

But lots of a lot of our fall plans actually in the first half of the year this year, so there's a lot of going through all their wedding plans, starting to work on the logistics, you know, all those little questions that pop up and asking all the suppliers those questions, sending out plans, all those kind of bits and bobs, so yeah, I've been focusing on that.

some information for you for an upcoming

Yes, lovely, glad you received it. Yeah,

it, you know,

good, good.

make sure the suppliers read

Yeah.

just in case you asked

comes with it. Please make sure that you do read this. So yeah I actually, I feel like I've got real far with the honeymoon. Because, again, it's like one of those things that you don't really like factor time in for, is it? Like, oh, it's so long winded. Like,

yeah,

it depends on what kind of honeymoon you have. But we're doing very much like, we want to go on loads of trips and stuff, so. Yeah.

a lot

Yeah.

in.

Exactly. So I've booked all the accommodation now and then we've kind of like set like what days we're going to do what. But suppose even if you go in like, I don't know, to the Maldives, you're going to want to book in like all your different trips and stuff. So it's like planning it. And I always feel like, I know you can like rock up to an all inclusive holiday and book your excursions at the hotel. But I feel like, yeah. Like,

I was like,

I feel like.

out

But I feel like if you do that, you don't always do everything that you wanted to do. And sometimes you get back and people are like, Oh, did you do this? And you're like, Oh no, didn't do that. Didn't, didn't know about that. Whereas if you research it first, you get to actually, and also sometimes you get there, you do a couple of days of chilling and you're like, Oh, let's start looking at trips. And then actually you don't have enough time to do what you want to do.

I

like going to direct.

Sometimes when you go abroad and like, the all inclusive and they're just like, oh, you know, it's like or whatever, you're just like

You know what? Yeah, exactly.

little like bummed

Yeah.

wow, this is

And I like,

is

like booking direct with people as well, because anybody, especially like these kind of abroad situations where, I don't know, they're taking you off, I don't know, jet skiing, that person who's taking you jet skiing will get paid like such a fraction of the cost, and that really infuriates me.

that's why I am going back to

Yeah,

system called Interflora, you've probably heard of it So basically I could say if I had a customer come to me and they wanted to send flowers to Wales Obviously, I don't deliver there. So you you go and you part of Interflora you you send the order through To a florist in Wales via this computer system.

fine, yeah.

in a, in the shop, we were part of an flora and they take like, you wouldn't believe the amount of money and the

Yeah, it's bad, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah,

not in a flo, a florist, but I say, don't go for a flora. Ring that florist direct, literally Google A in the area. You are gonna get

100%, exactly.

so much money's being taken

Yeah.

like with accommodation, like you're saying, like

Yeah.

for things. It's, it

Yeah, well I was on I think it was either TripAdvisor or is it, is it like Viator or something?

I've not heard of that.

It's quite like a, a big one online, like you can go and book your trips, right?

Yeah. Oh

one where we're doing like what is it, oh, we go into like, so a lot of places in Costa Rica, you have to basically pay entry for everything, even if it's like a waterfall outside. Like, it's pretty mental, but yeah, so you take a trip to the waterfall and then it's like, oh, you then go to the, these natural springs and we take you there and and there was lunch included. Well, then I actually looked into it. I bought the tickets direct.

my

you know what I mean? I'm like, I'm going to some it's cost me 20 quid. Like, fair if you haven't got a car, you could probably get a taxi even, or like, your hotel will probably do like, you know, take you around or something, you know?

Yeah,

yeah, yeah, shuttle. I don't know, I was like

insane.

Also, I feel like you wouldn't go to Costa Rica without hiring a car anyway, because it's just one of those places that you need a need a car.

to get around.

and you know when they just package it up, and yeah, like, you know when they package things up, it really bugs me, like, and I was like, hmm, this sounds really good, and then to start with, I was like, this sounds really cool, and then when I started looking at it and breaking it down, I was like, hang on,

hang on.

actually, I do this a lot cheaper myself, so, I know it's more time consuming, but it is what it is, you know?

Well, like you say, if you've got, if you have got that time beforehand or you factor in that time to

Yeah,

you should do. I think you'll totally, you know, it's a good, good thing to say. I think a lot of people will just go to the hotel and

yeah.

that they've got their best interest and they'll give you a good deal, but actually they haven't at

Or go to tour, like these honeymoon people, they're like, we'll book your whole honeymoon for you, and you're like, if they booked us everything that we're doing for our honeymoon, I guarantee it would have cost us like thousands more. Like, I've had couples come to me that are like, we literally just wanna, like one of my couples said to me once, we just wanna do like 10 nights in like South Italy you know, and, and do, you know, stay in a lovely hotel and stuff.

but

can definitely get a really nice like villa like for a couple of grand and then your flights to italy are not expensive

put

Yeah, it's a lot. It's mental

and stuff. Mind you, I mean, I don't, I don't really know, but I do feel, I do feel that there's a lot of, they just bulking it up,

Yeah, exactly. And you know the good honeymoon planners that I know charge like a rate A bit like how I do to plan. So, oh, this is how much it costs you to hire me to do anything for you, which is great because I tell you what is blimmin time consuming, so they're worth every penny. And they'll get you the best deals and they know the best places. Like, I've spent hours researching and blogs and stuff because I don't know, you know, what I'd have done without TikTok. I do not know.

and she's the same. They,

Yeah.

looks on TikTok a lot for

Yeah.

went round and booked things like separately, like

Yeah.

and

Yeah. That's what we've done. Yeah.

beforehand, like, organising it and they

It's time consuming.

time. Yeah,

It's time consuming. So if you do haven't got that time, then yeah, a hundred cent book someone, but yes, when they like, yeah, package it all up. I'm not, not a fan, but yeah. So that's what I've been doing. So I feel a bit better about that. And I did a open, even though I was talking on the last podcast about the open evening at Bodleian, which was really good. It was nice to, yeah, it was nice to meet some couples. It wasn't redonkulously busy because it's a Saturday evening.

that.

So she's called Catherine of Love Celebrants. So she's at Love Celebrants on TikTok. And I just wanted to touch on a conversation that we had, which I thought was actually really interesting. It was something. I've really like, thought, people don't really ask me, I suppose. Because I don't really get involved, I suppose, in like with the guests essentially.

Oh,

just to point out, she is Irish, and I have heard before, from other people who are Irish, Did we talk about this before?

Don't they end up so Basically, they get money back from

Yeah, didn't someone write in and say this to us?

Yeah. I

that they essentially end up being profit. Like, they end up being in pro Irish weddings end up being in profit. So you say you spend 50 grand on your wedding, you get that back, essentially.

oh my god.

In GIFTS. I know, so whether it's because she was Irish, I don't know, and actually, it's only just tweaked to me now, I'm talking about it.

it?

because actually I didn't say to her at the time, is that because you're Irish, I only just thought of it now. But yeah that's what she was saying, is essentially what she feels like, you know, whether she'd have a look at the venue, she'd be like, oh, okay, it's a really nice venue, you know, she was like saying, you know, if I was here at the Bodleian, I'd think, you know, 100 to 150 a head, so I'd probably give them, you know, me and my other half, two to three hundred pounds,

Wow. See

and I was like,

extremely generous That is

yeah, but it is a really good point, it is really hard to know how much money to give people

like how do you sort of work that out? I

Yeah.

it's a good question really, like if you're sat there like, you just sort of like give them 40 quid,

Yeah, and this is the other thing actually, I was having a conversation with one of my family actually at the weekend and I was saying, because we have set up the Prezola, thanks to Hayley, thanks for that little tip, but we've done everything from buy us a drink on the beach for a tenner.

no, yeah,

saying, I'm just, in my head, like, Oh, my cousin booked us to go and do this trip. In my head, I'm not thinking, Oh, it only cost her this much, or, Whoa, she spent loads of money. Do you know what I mean? Like, so I think it's actually a really nice way, Yeah, of doing it, because people go on and they think, Do you know what? This is what I can afford right now.

but if that's that's what I mean like with that that's what I liked about it Of even they can't they feel like well if I was doing it, I was spending 20 pound That was my budget as I say fine And if I put like our drinks on the beach,

Yeah.

it feels like I've bought them in

Yeah, exactly.

Or like towards like an excursion or something and it doesn't feel impersonal, whereas like, you know, even 20 pounds is a lot of money to somebody,

Yeah,

potentially. They, they might feel a bit embarrassed maybe putting it in a card like

exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause they're like, oh we'll start when I get home. Yeah.

isn't it?

Whereas actually 20 quid could potentially go towards a trip that, you know, like one of the trips we're doing is only 20 pound each. So, yeah, great.

so

Yeah.

one of

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. So that's great. And that's one of us doing like a two hour activity. So, you know, and it's the same as if you're going, I don't know, to the Maldives. It could be one of you having lunch. I don't, I don't really know how much the Maldives costs. I've never been, but

a lot of money.

probably a lot. I reckon you can get a salad for 20 quid. You get yourself a little sarny. But yeah, so I do think it's But yeah, I thought that was a really interesting conversation And I was like, it is actually a good way of looking at it, I suppose. Is when you are going to, you know, And for the couple, How are you, like, what are you expecting?

Yeah, hello.

Hello! And, The other thing is, is that you actually know what you're getting, a lot of our people are buying our gifts now, so we know, whereas if you're just collecting cash on the day, like, I don't know, is there an expectation to people, to couples think, oh I think we're roughly going to get about, I don't know, a thousand pounds, or is that just extra benefit money? Like, oh, that's a benefit. Well, that's an added bonus. We've got an extra grand, I don't know, from the day.

you kind of thought about like, how much you'll get in, have you thought about

No,

you'll get, this is like, factoring it into like, money you sort of need or something.

no, because I'm booking the excursions as people are booking them for us.

Yeah.

so obviously, so essentially the way that it works is they're not booking it. They're just giving you the money and it goes into a pot. So I'm then, we've drawn that money, booking the trip. So they're booked and then I will just probably see a couple of weeks before and if there's stuff that we still want to do that we haven't.

yeah. So we because obviously we weren't, we weren't all inclusive, so we, we'd paid obviously like for the, the hotel and

Yeah, you're like drinks on the beach. You get them free anyway.

Yeah. Suckers. No, I'm joking.

That's straight in my pocket.

So we used it we used it for like the, like doing the excursions and things like the trips out. So, cause obviously when it came to it, we'd like the money had gone in. And so we

Yeah,

you say, on the trips and things like that. So that was really nice. So we got to like experience like the holiday, like and

yeah.

to do. And I think the money that was left over, then we said, we've just saved it. And like, we use someone like our first anniversary

Oh, nice.

together, things like that.

Yeah, so you know you're using it.

Yeah,

Yeah.

because on there as well You can actually buy gifts.

Yeah, you can, yeah. I mean,

I

with a crazy markup.

frame

Did they?

sort of random. It was lovely. It was a silver photo frame, you can do that, but it was for us, we asked for money towards our

Yeah, fair play.

and like I say, we had a really nice day where we cause it was like a spa hotel,

Nice.

spa obviously wasn't included. So we had a spa day like with it as well. And

Oh, nice. Yeah.

thing that you

Little massage. That's on my list actually. Couples massage. Oh, lovely.

I'll get it for you.

Oh,

That's

thanks. That's about 100 quid though, sorry.

Oh, no, it's just 20 quid and a

You're like, no, oh no, I'll get you the coconuts on the beach.

Yeah. Oh

Cool. But yeah, so no, that was quite an interesting discussion. I thought it's something that you don't really think about, but I think if I was going, I think it's a, I think it's an interesting thought process of how you, obviously if you can't afford to do that, then fine, but I do think it's an interesting thought process of that, that's a good way of thinking at how much you should give people, or maybe at least 50%. So say you think, oh, my meal would have probably cost about 100 quid.

wrong here, but So With the Irish thing, so my, so my dad told me, so my nan was Irish, or her maiden name's Irish, so she's got some Irish in her,

yeah.

And I remember my dad telling me that she would always say you should give, like if you go to a party or anything like that, you should basically give what you sort of receive in a party. It's the

Yeah.

if you know

Was this girl saying yeah?

and, and I think that maybe that comes from there. It'd be

Maybe.

that,

I just checked it as well, it's plus 20%. She's like, whatever you think that Yeah. I know, right? It's a lot. My, jeez, money bags.

money bags.

Should we go into the listeners questions and messages?

Let's do it.

So, first up, we've got, My family is beginning to plan daytime events for the day before the wedding and I'm wondering how you spent the day and what you've seen others do. We have a welcome party in the evening, so I'm assuming we'll just be preparing for that, prepping for that, but my family seems convinced that that will have a bunch of free time. What happens the day before? Any night prior advice, ideas for day, night prior?

did, yeah. So we stayed in a hotel in Buckingham the the night

Yeah.

And there was quite a few of us, like bridesmaids, my nan and grandad, mum and

Yeah.

his girlfriend.

Yeah, so I think it's, you need to factor that time in, isn't it? Like, packing your stuff up at home, making sure you've got everything, travelling there, and then saying hello to all those people that are also staying there, because they're all going to want to see you.

we had dinner the night

Oh,

so

nice. Yeah.

and that was really nice actually, it was nice to sort of get together and everyone's like in a good

Yeah. And was Richard there as well? You did it together? Yeah.

No, so we didn't stay together the night before, so we

Yeah.

and we didn't see each other until, like, the

Nice.

stayed at, he actually stayed at home and

Okay.

stayed at ours with him,

Had a little lads night

well, I say that, he actually ended up having loads of stuff, see this is a good point to make, he actually had, done loads

of stuff to do.

but he had a lot of stuff to do the day

Yeah. This is the thing.

some platters and stuff for suppliers. I always provided sandwiches and

Yeah.

bits and pieces like that. He went and picked them up from M& S and like things like that. And

Yeah.

getting bits ready. And there's actually quite a few things. To

Yeah. I feel like you have to overestimate like how much there is to do. Like for me, I was like, well, actually all I need to do is drop the linen off. I'll iron the linen and then. Everything else has pretty much been done for me, but actually I feel like I'm probably going to want to hang about. I'll probably end up chatting to you for an hour. I'll probably end up chatting to the caterers. I'm probably going to want to put other little bits and bobs out.

Oh yeah,

Yeah, and I, I'm doing, although we're just having a blessing, we're going to get all our bridesmaids and stuff together and just do like a little mini rehearsal just so they see because they've not seen the venue. So. I wouldn't do that just to put everyone's mind at rest. And then also, I think you've got to factor in the fact that, I mean, I don't know how long your dinner went on the night before, but like, my plan is to just, I've got accommodation for me and my bridesmaids.

and dried and,

Yeah,

if they're staying with you, making sure their,

yeah,

and

yeah, and like getting all your little bits and bobs out and checking you've got everything, like, I'm definitely going to factor in time for the fact that I'm probably going to forget something and need to either rush out and get it, or, you know, like, go back home and get some, do you know what I mean, like, because it's just so easily done, like, obviously, yeah, pack your car up, make lists and stuff but there's always going to be something that crops up that, you know.

Yeah.

You're going to be like, so I personally wouldn't have that assumption in my head because I feel a bit the same like what your family's saying of oh, we're going to have loads of time. But actually I think that you should, shouldn't think like that because

shouldn't.

things are going to crop up and you're going to end up getting stressed.

anything and you've got free time or just spend it to

Yeah, exactly.

day is so full on.

Yeah,

so tired by the end of the day and like, if we'd have stayed up all night, you know. Whatever, partying or having drinks and things like that. You'd

yeah,

it because you can't, like,

exactly.

at like 6 in the morning to start hair and makeup sometimes and things like that.

Yeah,

that.

it's a lot isn't it? Yeah, and I also think that like, if you decide to pack the day out, like with activity, so like, you know, you are looking to do like a welcome pie in the evening and stuff, I, you know, again, you're gonna wanna then be prepping for that, getting yourself ready, and, and just remember that everyone's gonna wanna talk to you. So I would just say.

to

yeah I just wouldn't pack your day out I would just like Haley said if you end up a free time then just think of it as bonus time to just do What you want to do and chill sit in the bar and have a drink, or just check through your stuff again, like,

former life.

yeah, reflection. Like, I feel like I'm gonna want to get all my bits out and just check through it all, like, a couple of times, or even if you just want to sit with your bridesmaids and just go through the day and just feel like you've, you know what you're doing, you know?

just had like a, we had a, we had dinner and then we went up to our rooms and everyone was like washing their hair and

Yeah,

out, ready for the next day. And then, and then we like had some chocolate and just sat and

yeah,

chat, like

lovely.

was

Have a little coffee. I

Yeah.

on it. I wouldn't put any timescales. I've seen couples do this before. I had a couple last year. They actually flew in from America, so it's very normal for them to do stuff the night before.

because

they had

rehearsal dinner? That's an American thing,

Yeah, that is an American thing, yeah. So they basically, it's essentially like what you did. They just have a dinner the night before.

but like

But some of them will do speeches and stuff as well. Yeah, the night before. But they had like, yeah, so they had their rehearsal dinner. But they also had their church. So they had their church rehearsal in the afternoon. Then they had that. And I just felt like they were just rushing from things. And she was like, God, I've got to get back still. I've got to get ready for this rehearsal dinner. Like, I still haven't like, even sat and spoke to my Nan.

yeah, definitely. Yeah, take it easy. Don't don't do too much and

No.

Delegate jobs like with your bride if you got your bridesmaids grooms and anything like that with you Like if they can help in any way Definitely delegate

Yeah.

the last thing you're gonna want to do the day before your wedding is be stressing about

No. Oh, and their dresses. Getting all the dresses out. Like, if you've got like a few bridesmaids, steam them. Yeah.

them,

That's a long job.

satin. Oh,

God. Yeah.

Oh God.

Right, next question. Do you want to do this one?

Yeah. So just want some advice on what I should be thinking about in the final three months to my wedding.

Yeah, this is a good one, isn't it?

Yeah, so I like this, this question because actually, there's quite a few things that you, the last three months, I suppose you're kind of finalizing things really, getting those last bits together and just checking, making sure you've got everything

Yeah,

I mean, I don't

I feel like there's a lot in the last couple. I feel like there's a lot of appointments. So I think it's

all comes together, doesn't

Yeah, I feel like

details for things.

Yeah, I feel like it's managing Your diary at this point so making sure that like your trials are booked in if you haven't done them yet And if you have done them great you know That you've got things like, if you want your nails do in, if you want a facials for the last couple of months, you know, if you have Botox, that you've got that booked in, if you've got your, not even just your hair trials, but your hair appointments, so like, your cut and your, and your color, stuff like that.

yeah,

and they haven't, especially if it's not something you do on a regular, like, I regularly have my nails done, so it's fine, but if you don't regularly have your,

don't

I don't know, your brows doing, yeah, or spray tan, like, you need to be thinking about what you want doing and getting it booked in.

just a side note as well, never start a new, like, say if you get regular facials and things like that,

Hmm.

start a new skincare routine close to your wedding. Because if you flare up or something like that,

Yeah, good point.

I've decided I'm going to have a face mask, do the face mask the night before the wedding. know what I mean?

Yeah, it's so true, or like, I'm gonna start using retinol a week before to get rid of my wrinkles.

I remember someone saying that to me. it sounds like a silly

No, it's so true.

don't want to have a reaction to something that close to your wedding. So

Yeah,

unless you already do a skincare routine, don't go starting a new one that close

that's such a good point. And I think just thinking about, like, that last question is really linked in, like, thinking about things like that, what you're gonna do the day before, like, how long are things gonna take, when are

Yeah,

coming in, you know, start putting a full plan together. And I mentioned it before, I have a full wedding plan. If anyone wants it, ping, ping us an email. I'll email it over to you. You know, little things like that, you know, your perfume, jewelry. I always think that comes down in the last couple of months.

and things

and shoes, and also I suddenly thought the other day with mine, so I'm getting my dress fitted the first week of April, but my shoes for my first wedding, I haven't got them yet. I'm like, I need them for the fitting. You need that stuff. And actually you might want to take your jewelry and stuff to your fitting so you can see like the whole look. So it's all like these little bits are like all interlinked. I mean, we're still going through finding suits at the moment. I say we, my other half.

know.

but it's easy for men in it. I'm not even stressing about it. Cause I'm like, you can rock up to next the day before I get a suit. Yeah, yeah,

them as well, can't you? Like, it's so easy.

exactly.

dresses, they're never the right They just come in weird sizes, don't they? They have to be altered. You've

Yeah,

a

exactly. Yeah. So, making sure your honeymoon's all planned, booked in, if you're gonna do it straight after. And also, one of the things I've got on my to do list is honeymoon clothes. So I need to go through what I've got, or what I want

Yeah,

buy.

all

Yeah. Yeah.

you've got all

Because I don't want to do that.

like suitcases, all prepared

Yeah.

getting them all

Things like that. I would also, at this point, I always think your, all of your suppliers are going to want to, will start bombarding you like four weeks before for like final details, like final numbers. Dietary. So for like you, you want to know how many tables there's going to be. So you know how many centerpieces you're doing. Because you want to, everyone wants to start ordering. So like Hayley would start ordering flowers. The caterer is going to start ordering food.

I was gonna say it's always those people.

Always. The stragglers.

The stragglers.

You know, and then collating information to collate, isn't it? You know, all your diet trees and stuff. How many people? Kids? How many kids meals?

kids meals, supplier meals as well. Like

Yep,

about that and also everyone's gonna be wanting their final payments.

yep, yep. Getting that old bank card out. Yep.

So it's gonna be lots

It's a lot of lists, isn't it? Yeah, it's a lot of lists, a lot of, you know, requesting information, a lot of, yeah, payments and stuff Yeah, final check in. A lot of suppliers want to do final meetings, don't they? Yeah,

They do, yeah, so I always do mine like four to six weeks before

yeah.

we do a final, final meeting and we go through like logistics and things like that and just making sure anything, nothing's changed and if it has what, and, and you know, just make sure everyone's on, singing from the same hymn sheet

Yeah, exactly. Whereas this is where I do think it is so beneficial getting a planner involved because

Well they do it all for you.

we do the one meeting with a couple and then we do all those meetings and fill out all those forms. Like the amount of forms I go back to, like it's in the wedding plan, it's in the wedding plans.

in the wedding plan. Refer to the wedding plan.

Whereas a couple would probably follow that. Like, I've got, for mine, I've got like two different photographer's forms. Like, you know, the florist wants to send you a form for information. Like, the caterer wants information. Like, everyone wants the same information. Actually, sometimes you think it'd be good to just get all the suppliers on one call. But it's just not possible. Everyone's busy. Everyone's got stuff going on, haven't they? So, yeah, all those kind of final check ins.

ramps up like the last two weeks before like, I just remember, even with all the help and that it did did get quite overwhelming.

Yeah,

perhaps prepare yourself for that and if there's anything you can do in advance to kind of yourself feeling that way. Like you say, making sure you you're making lists of what needs to be

yeah,

a checklist and

yeah,

And like, if you've got all your information in one place, anything you can do to help yourself out in advance

definitely.

really helpful.

That's like, I've started putting lists together of like, what I need to take the night prior. Like, it's still got like, nearly three months away, but

I had

if I do that now, yeah, when I'm like, then not got any time the week before, I can be like, oh, I've already got that list and then I've just got to tick it off and it's done. Another one that I think a lot of people don't think about alongside perfume and aftershave, always one people forget, is your speech. So I think it's, if you're doing a speech, like make sure you get your speech written and make sure you get it printed out.

Yeah. It's not a

just don't think it looks good in the picture, do you know what I mean?

out speech.

Yeah, do you know what I mean? A nice bit of card.

Yeah,

sit down, write, start writing it now, three months before, like 100%.

vows on the phone?

No.

their vows out

No, but to be honest, 99 percent of people either have like, a Civil ceremony where they tell you what to say, a church where they tell you what to say, all the celebrant, the way that it's written is so they don't have to, like, necessarily say a lot, yeah. But no,

did not

if,

we

I think, yeah, I think, I think celebrants normally, like, advise to have them print it out, so, yeah, on, like, nice. Anyone that I've seen do their own vowels has had it, like, printed out nicely, so. Yeah, it's a lot of bits, isn't there? It's all those, like, little things. I think you just need to sit down, go through the whole day with your other half.

Oh,

you just tell me what you think about this? You know?

And then you're like, forget what you've speak spoken

Yeah.

So it's good just to have that, that, yeah, that weekly check in

Yeah.

just

if you're, do you know what, if you're feeling stressed about it, which you may be because you're, you've written it about it, like booking an hour power session with like, with a planner, like it, it doesn't cost a huge amount and you can then go through everything and it, sometimes it's just having those, an experienced person, isn't it? To go, Oh yeah. Have you thought about this? Have you thought about that?

little things like

Yeah.

overlook but obviously doing it all the time and

Yeah.

you just get to know what these

Yeah. Exactly.

So yeah, I think that's a good That for people if

Yeah.

get in contact with someone like yourself. Yeah,

Exactly. Or even just do it with your bridesmaids, like I'm sure a lot of your, many of your bridesmaids might have been married before or, you know, just do a little session with them.

Yeah

just go through it. Was there any things that you forgot about or, you know? Yeah, definitely. But yeah, I'd say, yeah, final three months is a, is a busy one. A lot going on. A lot going on. Yeah, I'd say by this point though, you probably are going to have all your suppliers booked. Yeah, I don't think you did, did you?

I didn't, mm,

Because I think I Did you?

The only things I didn't, the only things I did last minute, like booking,

It was your glasses, like two weeks before.

that was it really. Everything else

Didn't we book your videographer? Because I think, like, I came on board only like three months before. Maybe it was longer before. Because I booked your videographer. And your

I was really, I was

tableware.

with

Oh, okay, maybe I was, maybe I worked with you before. Yeah. Yeah, it must have been earlier.

I, I did, I did everything quite in advance. booking. I mean, we had a year

Yeah.

getting engaged, but I got on it straight away because I was excited. So I

Mm hmm.

But I think, yeah, last three months. Yeah. We, we decided last minute that, well, I say we, I decided last minute that

You decided.

glassware and

Yeah, you did. That was literally like two weeks before. We lit that was with we were sat in your lounge going through the full day. Like, literally like we were just talking about a session with a planner. We did that, didn't we?

yeah.

I want to change them glasses. And I said, no worries, Haydar. I'll sort that for you.

no worries. I'll do that for you.

I'll do that. But yeah, I was just thinking, you know, other little bits. Like if you want to get if you want a change of outfit you know,

yeah second. Yeah,

Yeah, second out yeah. Evening shoes. Shoes for the evening. Is always something that people may miss Yeah, just going through what you, you know, in your head, exactly what you want, how you see the day panning out and yeah, get all those final, because I do find suppliers can be a bit of a mare sometimes where they literally message like, can we do a catch up next week? And obviously if you're really busy, like it's going to be difficult.

Yeah, like you said organizing your diary and

Yeah.

they're all booked in

Yeah.

That's really good advice.

I think that's us for today, isn't it?

Yeah, that's it. I don't think Lily's been too bad

No, she hasn't. Good girl.

of background

Aww, she sounds cute though. What's she up to? Is she sleeping, or?

No,

No. No.

I'm just rocking side to

Rocking side to side, yeah. We did have a baby join us, guys. Just we may have cut that bit out. But

Our youngest guest on

Our youngest employee. Yeah, yeah. Our first ever guest and our youngest. Yeah.

Oh,

All right then. Thank you so much. You know where we are if you want to send your questions in. Let's Get You Weird.

you.

Yeah. Let's Get You Weird podcast at gmail. com. We're at Let's Get You Weird on Instagram and TikTok and we'll see you next week.

See you next week.

Thanks guys. Bye bye bye.