Happy Saturday.
Oh, it's a Saturday.
It
It's an unusual day roster record, isn't it? A Saturday?
is. the dedication to the cause, guys
Yeah.
fricking busy that we're recording on a Saturday
love it. We love to record.
outside
nice today.
We're bringing you the content that you need. But happy Thursday
Yeah. Happy Thursday.
And Happy March. Can you believe it's
So bizarre.
Let's, go then.
let's go
Hi, I'm
and I'm Haley
and we are your wedding planning experts.
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and
let's get you word
it. Woo.
woo. So I'm just sat here looking at the, uh, the, our little show notes that we do and I'm, I'm, I'm really intrigued to know why you've written down Willy Wonka
Well, Haley, I will enlighten
Indulge Me.
as well as it being the 1st of March day, although I, this was a last week thing, but I saw in the press that it was actually one year since the really dodgy Willy Wonker event experience.
God. Yeah.
ago. a
Wow. That's gone quick.
whole, uh, you know when you just go down a, a, rabbit
Yeah. Yeah.
and well, you know, so the girls that were actresses or were actors, however you wanna say it, nowadays in this, you know, they'd been hired to be these, um, lumpers
Yeah.
of them doing
What a gig.
from it. Now. What a gig. What a gig. Obviously they'd been in the press, they'd turned up to this job. They'd been hired to be these in plyers turned up. Worst event ever.
Oh man.
The, police were called and, you know, awful.
Oh no.
of these girls has like been on this morning. She was like
Oh, they do get anyone on this morning though, don't they?
anyone on this morning,
someone I, I could like sell my fart in a jar and I'd be on this morning about how I've made a million pound from it.
be on this morning talking about weddings.
I mean, don't get me wrong. I love it.
You'll
I'm all into my daytime tv.
She's sucking back up. Um, yeah. So yeah, she's done, she's done pretty well. Apparently. They did a musical version of the Bad Willy Wonker
actually hilarious.
uh, fringe Festival last
Oh,
she was
that's a good idea though, to
They also
make light of it.
it for one day only in LA
No,
Yeah. What
you're joking
so it goes to show not all bad press is bad
and you can polish a turd because
you can, I mean we've some, some pretty bad stuff in our
Yeah, I was gonna say, how does this relate to like some of the events I've seen? My God.
as it kind of reminded me, obviously these were girls that have, or men and women that were actresses and actors that were hired to turn up and do this event, and they turned up and it was awful. But we've had this, I suppose when we're freelancing,
Yeah,
up,
you just, you dunno what to expect and you just.
you're turning up to.
Just get involved. Uh, I'm literally like, just thinking about it now, and I've seen some things. I've seen some awful stuff. Like, I, I'm gonna say one time I did a, I was freelancing at this. It was like a, uh, I guess like a golf club kind of vibe. It wasn't, I dunno if it was a golf club, I'm not really sure, but it was pretty shabby. I'm not gonna lie. Anyway.
And this company had turned up to like, basically do all the, the staging and like the, like, you know, sometimes they will put down like a plastic floor and that for the dance floor,
yeah,
all that, it was that kind of thing. They turned up like, so we couldn't do anything on the stage with the flowers until they'd been there. We were waiting them for them for two hours.
Jesus.
late. It was so bad. And then it was all like, um, plastic, uh, what's it called? Like pers specy stuff, but like white Perspex and they were just covering everything in plastic. Yeah. acrylic
Oh,
was honestly horrendous. And they had this like fake plastic. They were literally using plastic sheets just to make a dance floor. I was like, surely that's like a health and safety hazard,
What the hell
like with the initials on and everything.
no.
honestly, it was Oh bad. It was, it was awful. That should have been, they should have been arrested for that. It was a crime against, I dunno, fashion.
pictures.
I don't think I took any out of the actual shame of it all. I was like, I don't want, dunno if I want anyone to know. Been there to be honest.
I feel like my worst ones are like. The, like when they've gone really too into the theme, like, I'll
Yeah, they've,
one and it was like a Cinderella slash Harry Potter slash They weren't Disney slash they weren't really
that sounds my, like my worst nightmare. That does Oh.
and there was, there was a lot going on. There was a lot of baby pink and a lot of baby blue. And I was a bit
Oh, that sounds, just, sounds like a baby shower, doesn't it? Ew.
And then I'll never forget, I mean, these ones are unforgettable, aren't they?
Exactly.
I turned up to this freelance job and it was like Alice and Wonderland thing, but I mean like the groom was dressed as like the Mad Hatter. Is it the Mad Hatter?
Yeah.
the, Clowny kind of one.
Oh. Oh
basically
my God. No. Didn't you, did you send me photos?
I'm a bit scared.
You sent me photos of that.
I
Wasn't that the day I, didn't I FaceTime you to say I was pregnant? Is that where you were?
I can't rem now. I was at home,
No, you were. You were, um, you were, you were at, you were working. I know where you are. I know where you were. But I,
it was then,
I think, I don't wanna say where it was. So we don't wanna, we don't wanna give away where that, where that what it was.
Yeah, yeah. No, you're right. Actually, maybe you're
I dunno. I just know you were, I just remember around that time you putting.
remember with the face paint though? Full
it was horrific. Actually looked kind of scary.
she had fairy wings on. Um, yeah, I mean it was, I
I mean, do what you want. You know what I mean?
do, yeah.
We we're all about, you know, you have the wedding that you want here at, But
weren't my
doesn't mean we are not gonna judge you.
shock when I turned up because I was just expecting to freelance at a normal
Just a normal, normal day at the office.
groomers got face paint on like, like full white face, like
He went for full glam.
like the wig. I am not even joking
It's funny,
said to him, I think this is the first time I've ever seen a groom that's probably taken longer to get ready than the bride.
it's funny.
And it was all like Alice and Wonderland theme inside and
Wow. Oh my God.
your boat, but yeah, that did remind me of that. I'm not gonna lie. Willy
I,
Alice and Wonderland. Similar, Similar, kind of
I did one, um, that was like, I don't even know what you'd call it. Is it Henry's Tudor, wasn't he? It was like Tudor theme.
yeah, yeah,
Yeah, And they all dressed up in like Tudor outfits.
Medieval,
that's the word I was looking for. It was a medieval theme and they were like wearing the, it was like, it was, it was like more mead kind of vibe. It was, it was mad. It was absolutely mad. And I was like, oh my gosh. But
funny.
because of my, um, when I did my level five floristry course, we had to do like historical floristry.
Oh
And so I actually knew about how to like, do stuff that's historically accurate as in like, I could make, I could,
flowers.
a medieval bouquet. Like I could make, you know, like I'd, I'd done like a nose gay.
to come.
But, um, going on, on off, on a tangent, the reason why they, uh, little B, they used to take around these things, it's called like nose gaze and they were like full of rosemary and bits and bobs and it was because it stunk so bad of, of we and poo in the streets and stuff that they used to carry flowers. So,
So they did. So it didn't smell.
so basically
is, isn't
that's where the humble florist comes from.
Yeah. Lovely. Yeah. Well, well says it all, don't it?
How day.
to,
Yeah.
but uh, yeah. So have you had a busy week? What have you been up to?
I have been busy. So I, I, I went to London to do this networking. Freelance.
chatting.
So I went there. Uh,
note you and asked you to
you did, but I didn't.
She was like, I'll save it
I'll save it for just don't reply. No, it was really good. Um, so yeah, I went there and, uh, I, I mean I haven't network done networking for ages and I remember the last time I went with you was when we went to that, um, I'm really bad at small. I get really nervous and I get quite shy. So I was turned up and there was quite a few people there.
Hmm.
Um,
when you're on your own,
yeah,
start?
sort of went in the,
up
in the shop and was just sort of there like.
Yeah. Hey, just kinda
Help. Um, but luckily, uh, one of the managers came over and spoke to me. So, um, so the job I was going for is like a, is for freelancing at their Windsor,
Yeah.
shop. So the, the, the, the company's called Lavender Green. So they're, they're very sustainable. They don't really use foam, if at all. Um, they're actually, um, is it called a B Corp for being like, yeah. Um,
to
yeah. Um, so it's really, really interesting. But they do all the flowers for Royal Ascot, Wimbledon, all the sporting events around
Yeah.
of that area. Um, so they do flowers at Natural History Museum, and I was just like, I really want to freelance for this company. I'm really up for it. So, um, I, I kind of had to like, sell myself essentially, which I didn't come prepared to do. Well, I sort of did and didn't.
Yeah.
Um. But yeah, it was good. Actually. It was, I don't normally do it, but I, I did go and ha have a little tut tut of my trumpet and blew, had had a little blow on that.
Yeah. Nice, nice, nice.
It was good.
a podcaster.
Yeah. I was like, oh, so do your podcast
It's
you wanna follow me.
sitting at number one
Yeah. I'm, uh, sort of a little bit famous. I know you've heard of me right.
may recognize this face
well, someone, one of the other girls there was like, oh, I really recognize you. I was like, it's probably from my number one podcast.
Was it where from She recognized
didn't know. She was like, I recognize you from somewhere. I was like, it must be, that must be. Then she followed me, so,
of anything
yeah. Yeah, I've just got one of those faces. Um, but yeah, so I blew my, my own trumpet. I, I, it obviously worked because they've invited me to come in to, um, do like a, like a day with them and just sort of meet everybody before it gets into like mad wedding and event season.
Yeah,
weddings, but they're more like events, so they're like more doing all the sporting events and stuff. But
Then there's not too much of like a crossover with what you do for
yeah. It's not too far. Like for me to get to Windsor is like an hour, which is like, I don't mind Central London's. Okay. But the, the price, like how much it costs you on the train and stuff. Sometimes it's like you're losing two hours of your
yeah, Yeah.
work. But anyway, yeah. So it was really fun. Um, I enjoyed that and
to meet lots of
yeah, got to meet a lot of other freelancers that are, are working at lots of other, um, like London, uh, wedding florist and stuff. So it was just really good. And yeah, so I was just, felt, I felt good about that. I felt confident when I left. Yeah. But
go girl.
that was, that was, that was the biggest part of my week. But, um, how was yours?
Yeah, yeah, Same old, busy,
Same. How old?
still in the old recruit, and so we had,
Oh yeah. Yep.
have changed for them, so
Oh.
able to, to do the role.
Oh no.
to square
Oh no.
one.
Oh, what shame.
it is not too bad. 'cause we, uh, we had a couple other people that
Yeah.
in,
okay. At least there's that. Yeah.
really started training or anything, so that's good. But I am really getting busy now, so
Yeah, I was gonna say it's real ramping up for you. Yeah,
like going through CVS and interviewing and stuff, like Takes time.
yeah,
the corporate company we're working with, set out all there. So we basically, for this corporate company, I mean, we, we will kind of take on any role in terms of event management in for corporates, but we, for this company, we are doing all like the delegate management.
yeah.
sent the invites out. Now it's our job to find out like their direct requirements, what days they need accommodation, like all those kind of bits and bobs. So all the emails went out. end of last week, so I've just
Oh,
many, you
replies.
your inbox and I
Yeah.
a hundred emails, and I tell you what a corporate loves to do is copy you in,
Yes.
everything.
I did a few corporate events last year and then, I mean, I didn't expect it 'cause I thought, well, I'm only the, you know what I mean? I'm just doing the flowers, but I, it was the same.
you
I was like, God, oh my God. Like literally, I know what I dunno. Joe from Accounts wants for their meal on there.
Literally, and honestly, some of the requests you get from people are just a balmy. Honestly.
Can you say any?
Well, I, I, I dunno, I'll wait till after
Yeah, go on then.
but
That's how,
some of them, went nuts. So yeah, that was a little bit overwhelming yesterday when I opened up the inbox
yeah, I bet.
just send out the invites, but I didn't think that many people would be contacting me that quick, but that's fine. And then, um, we also had another taste in this week, which was great, but, um, yeah, so that, that went really well. But one, one thing I have really noticed this year from my tastings, and I thought I'd just mention it,
Yeah.
that obviously this whole sharing vibe is very big at the minute.
Okay. I.
are loving the sharing platters, you know, and the, the meats, the potatoes, the salads and whatnot on the tables, and people help themselves, people liking that kind of
Yeah.
plated,
it kind of like charcuterie, like grazing style kind of,
Yeah. And then the main course is more like,
Serve yourself.
maybe slices of beef
I see what you mean. Yeah. Yeah.
they have like potato brothers and
Oh my God, I love that. Yeah. That's a bit of me. That is.
different salads. And then people, they're putting like big bowls on platters on the tables, which can look really nice. But what I'd say is, is a couple of times this season so far that I've seen where people have chosen sharing and it's come out to the table and I just instantly see that look in their faces of like, not sure on the presentation.
Oh, okay.
something I wanted to flag is that like for sharing platters, it. Yeah, they can look nice, but they're never gonna be as presentable as a single plated meal
Yeah.
see, on their
Yeah, they're like pristine.
Yeah. Which is why caterers don't really put loads of pictures of sharing stuff on their brochure.
Oh, okay. Yeah,
it looks stunning, but that's plated food. And also what you've gotta remember is, is with sharing stuff. As soon as, even if it comes out and it looks like fairly nice, you know, making a bowl of potatoes is a bowl of potatoes.
yeah.
lot, you
You understand what you're saying?
Z it
Yeah.
as soon as somebody's got like a spoonful of. You know, whatever dip
It's just gonna ruin the
Yeah.
presentation. Yeah.
tables. And I think, you know, a few of my couples this year have gone like, oh, dunno about the presentation,
Yeah.
it to look, which is fair. Like people want their day to look nice and you spend a lot of money on food. You want people
To
want it to
look good.
to how you want it to be. So just wanted to, to, to flag that because I think we had this discussion with my couple this week and they were like, yeah, to be fair, we didn't really think of it that way. So I thought, I flag it for people that are, 'cause some caterers will only offer one tasting in. So once you know, you're kind of then in a bit of a rock and hard place. Thankfully we're of an amazing cater own, they're like, yeah, come back, try some plated
Yeah.
yeah, what I would advise to do is the charcuterie looks beautiful. So you have that as your starter
Yeah. Nice.
plated Maine, and then your dessert stations look lovely. So
Yeah. Love a dessert station.
Yeah,
what you had. That was nice.
sharing, sharing, sharing, it can be a bit much. And also it takes a lot longer because. What you gotta think is right. So say I put a plate in front of you and it's already got everything
Yeah.
potatoes, whatever you, you eat it and we can see, oh, they've finished their plate. Or you put your knife and fork down when you are sharing, right? People are so like picky,
Oh, that's a good point. Yeah.
and they keep
And the heat going.
And the wedding
Yeah.
a Cajun company is, you cannot clear
To,
have
yeah.
So it does take a lot longer.
That's a good point. You flagged. That is. 'cause I wouldn't never have thought of that actually. That's that kind of thing.
as lovely and then your main,
Have a Plated Maine. Yeah.
about this, how they
Yeah. Good point.
just, mention
Yeah.
Um, yeah. So yeah. Um, and then next week we've got one of our couples coming from America, so we're doing lots of site visits, a tasting.
Oh, another tasting.
Another tasting in. Um, so that's for their wedding next
Yeah.
their ca they'll be picking their
Exciting.
which is really exciting. So yeah, it'd be
Oh
them because you speak to people so much. I've been working with 'em for a couple of months. You speak on video, you
yeah. It's nice to
meet them face to face is
so this is the first time you're meeting them in person.
to face.
Oh, lovely. Yeah. Oh, exciting. Okay. Oh, that'd be really good though. Oh, you've been so busy.
I know it's so busy next week, like honestly, I'm like, I'm ba not back in the office till Wednesday and I'm only only in the office Wednesday and Friday next
Hence why we are recording now.
Yes. Literally. So,
It's good though. It's good.
I also wanted to bring up this week as well about, and I've seen a massive incline in, in this subject
no.
I haven't actually seen them much at punk weddings. I've done personally, I, I dunno if it's just, maybe not my couple's vibe or whatever, but I'm seeing 'em a lot online and it's the crisp ball.
Oh, come on.
to say
I just wanted to say,
Where has this come from? Like
oh,
a fan of a crisp, I
oh, I, me and you were talking crisps. I swear we had like a 10 minute conversation about what CRISP we like when we were driving back from CommonWell.
yeah, yeah,
love a crisp as much as the next person,
absolutely obsessed. But I just
wedding,
don't understand where this has
no,
from
it is just more it's, it's one of them things. It's just like more money for tat,
yeah,
Come on, let's be honest.
Let's face it, a bag of Monster Munch does not look
It's not, it's not plea unless your theme's purple and well, it depends what flavor you've gone for. Pickled onion,
oh, no, no.
purple and yellow.
roast
Oh yeah. Raw
might have to go, I might have to go get a bag of them later.
flavoring. Hot Suppose as well, actually.
Oh, so good.
Cool.
yeah, anyway, raining it back in. Just so many I, The, the way, the reason I bought this up is I've seen multiple discussions this week alone where people are like, oh, just substitute evening food for a crisp ball and a donut wall. And I'm like, no people, you can't substitute a pizza for a
No.
of crisps. I'm sorry, but No, they're a snack.
No. Do you know what? Right. I am not gonna name any names, obviously, but I used to know someone and every time they did a party or anything, they would just put loads of crisps out. Um, but they would put them in bowls, but then they would put the packet underneath the bowl.
Oh,
And
see
you but it just
funny.
annoyed me. I dunno why, but it's just like, it just looks so bad.
skips. They don't last longer than half an
No, they go
Funny, stale,
stale,
stale, quick. Your maze snack does not
I can understand a Chris ball party yet. Like I know. So if you had like a 30th, like crystal ball, like something like that, like a little snack, something like, but not for a wedding, not in replacement for your evening food.
That's not
That ain't right.
up. Like, if I was going to a wedding and I came
You a freaking bag of crisps.
I'd be like, sorry.
Yeah.
Like, or like, you know, like, where's the whole roast at? You
Excuse me. Where's my burger?
can't be substitute
My buffet?
for some Tesco crisps. Like,
No.
a good idea. And they, they
And it's not cheap though. People probably think, oh, it's gonna be cheap, cheaper than getting evening food. But actually to buy a bag of crisp for like a hundred, 200 people
Yes,
because,
a.
and that's a lot of money in the end of the day. Even if you go to Costco.
50
Yeah, yeah. Costs a living, mate.
Gloucester living. Yeah. You're so right. That's such a valid point. But also, right, so we actually did a kind of like, we did some crisps and, and, uh, chocolate and bits and bobs at mine. 'cause I just, I did the whole, I just ordered dinner load pizza at nine o'clock.
That's a good idea.
I just did
I
like, yeah I did like,
picky bits. Yeah. And just like, that's a good idea actually.
you know, on the
Yeah. For a party though.
'cause it was a
Yeah.
all you find is I had to put out loads of bins, which you don't care because there's a party. But when it's a wedding, where are people putting these crisp
Yeah, good point.
I would not wanna coordinate one of these weddings.
imagine,
packets up all day.
yeah, and imagine you've just had this beautiful free course plated meal and then your evenings of fucking gross.
Just
Come on.
your
Talk about Lauren Tone,
Maybe it's like a funny thing for like,
like if you love crisps.
yeah, it started as like a funny
Yeah.
like one of my friends is obsessed of Chris. She loves a Chris. Like, so I would think that's quite funny. Like we had a bath at our wedding because, it's
cause you love Yeah, he loves,
loves
loves above.
people get
Yeah.
And I feel like it started from that and then people, but how this has evolved into evening food, like people,
Yeah.
evening food. Like if it's funny, if it works well for you and you are, or you've got loads of kids or whatever, or you're gonna put it outside in the corner, like fine, but still have the pizza van or the, the
Yeah,
the fish and
I feel like, um, do you remember during Covid where it was like you could, they were trying to justify what a, um, a meal was? What was, it had to be like a, do you remember like a port and a, you could sit and have a drink or something if you
yeah,
a, a substantial meal.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
people are trying to say that a packet of crisp is a substantial meal.
Yeah. Wasn't it like one of the mps or
Yeah, that's it.
okay 'cause we had crisps.
Yeah. And a port pie,
Yeah,
uh, dear,
feels like that vibe. Very, very true. But
that's funny.
other ways. And we were actually discussing, um, when our couples about, because you know, their wedding was a lot later and they're a bit like, you know, you've not finished until 9:00 PM What, what can, what can you do? You don't want a whole hot roast or pizza van or whatever. And they're, you know, charcuterie is a great way of doing it. Cheese boards later on, um, we were saying about, um, one of our couples before has had the tower of pork pie
Oh my god,
sliced it all
that sounds incredible.
yeah, we put it on big wooden trays and then we took it around and put, and we had it with little dips and stuff,
Yeah.
to pour pie and dips, things
Ah, my God.
are quite popular. I've
Yeah,
rolls
that's a good idea.
a little, you, you wanna soak up the booze, you want something to soak it
Have you ever had someone do, um, McDonald's
No, I haven't. 'cause I just don't think it would last
go
it doesn't,
stale? Yeah,
And you'd have to be able to
soggy chips.
No,
And they're always bloody cold when you go to the freaking drive through anyway.
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I've never done any like actual, you know, like some people do dominoes and stuff like that. I've never actually had a wedding do that. It's always through the caterers and it will just be a,
I don't think I have either.
toasties. is
Oh. That's a good idea.
What,
Yeah.
We always get
We are always talking about food is fine. Love it. I love it.
So yeah, just wanted to flag that Anyway. Please don't use a crisp wall as your evening food. If you must have one,
Food.
Maybe you've got a cool way, a way that it looked really cool. Send us a picture if you did, but, uh, yeah, no, not for evening food. I need a pizza, please.
It's not a substantial meal packet. Christmas. Oh, something else I've seen online this week, actually, which, um, took me back to when we were chatting about how we were gonna merge surnames and you were gonna, what was I was gonna be called whiff.
Yeah, and
Well,
and we couldn't physically make one of
yeah.
it doesn't
Doesn't work. Um,
Hailey, with
any whiff,
Lily with,
Lily whiff. That's funny. Um. Well, I saw online that basically this couple had, um, uh, they couldn't decide how to double barrel their surname, which way round to do it. So they actually put a vote out on their RSVPs, on their invites and did it on their wedding website.
Love
And I just thought that was really cool.
Yeah. That is
and then they literally, so they had a celebrant and then, um, during their ceremony they revealed at the end so that the celebrant was like, well, now I'm gonna reveal what your surname is gonna be and what I'm gonna announce you as. Yeah.
is cool.
was really cool.
love
I just thought such a different thing
know, like a, you know, like a re reality TV show
to do. Yeah. To,
at
yeah.
kind of vibe. I love that. And now we shall announce.
I'll announce you.
I
Yeah,
That's such a good idea
I thought so as well.
fast as well, I suppose you are choosing the names that are the options, aren't you to go on the website, So
So you, it.
like people are just doing random ones,
Yeah. So, yeah, exactly. So they had, I think they must have done, like say if it was like me and Richard say it'd be like Waller Smith or Smith Waller, like, and they just decided which way round it went, I think. 'cause they couldn't decide as a couple or they just couldn't de like agree on it. Yeah,
I would definitely be reverting whiff.
I know you would.
Ha with Ha, with
Here she comes.
ha, with
That's jokes. Ah, taking bookings goes.
Oh, jeez. Jeez, geez. I would definitely, would I avoid you if you were cooked
I said no, I just wanna avoid myself. I'd probably be someone that'd have a crisp ball.
Oh, as a evening food. Sorry to anyone. I want a crystal ball.
Oh, there's no shade. It is, it's only bad if you're using it as your evening food. It's just, they're purely as a s snacker or a joke to say like, we like crisps.
putting it out there. I don't like them. Full
I just think they look pants.
yeah,
thing is the thing that's misleading about a lot of things that you see online and on Pinterest
Mm-hmm.
they jazz it up. The, the photographer does a great job of making it look good with a filter.
The little pegs.
Yeah. But they're in real life. It's, Hmm.
festively, like barn style maybe,
It depends though.
bales, your, you know, your smores. Like if you're going for that
Yeah,
outside is really like, right. Maybe got whole gross going on, like rusticy kind of
yeah. yeah. Maybe
not if you've had a really
that's what I mean.
wedding
Like a free horse meal. Yeah. It's not,
Flowers by Haley at Bloomfield's, planned by Hannah at Hannah Ray's weddings. I just wouldn't
I can do a garland on that. Decorated foil.
No, no, no, no.
Uh, do you know what else this was? Sorry. I see something else. And it was just, again, it just reminded me 'cause I was on this, um, Facebook group for like wedding DIY weddings and, uh, someone was, someone had basically made their own, uh, welcome sign
right.
and it was a mirror, and then they'd done some vinyl on it and it looked nice. It was like, nothing wrong with it, but it was that whole thing where it was like, welcome to, so it'd be like, me, welcome to Haley's wedding featuring Richard
yeah.
can't get on board with that.
like that was funny when the first
Yeah. Now it's, so it's just done.
think of your own ideas.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah.
Yeah.
I just can't,
one of my, um, one of my couples was laughing about this saying about having it as, um, her and her maid of honor, which I thought was funny
yeah.
because like her and her maid of like her maid of honor comes to her plan in meetings and
Really? Oh.
different. I haven't seen
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's, it's new.
yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But now
It's new.
much
been overdone.
thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh dear. Well, on the, uh, on the note of seeing this DIY stuff and someone asking, well how should I decorate it? And a garden and the things, anyway, I had someone approach me about something this, this week
Yeah.
and they ended up ghosting me. Uh, well they sort of ghosted me and they then, then they didn't. But anyway,
right.
I wanted to bring up ghosting again 'cause we sort of briefly mentioned it. We did, yeah. Oh, ghost. Ooh.
ghosting. We should have talked about this at Halloween.
Yes. Um, but basically wanted to just chat about how. Don't ghost your suppliers, it's okay to reject them or to say no thank you. Um, because ghosting them is, it's just annoying. Uh, from a supplier's point of view, it's, it's a wastes time. I'd rather someone just say, look, I don't wanna work with you, whatever, whatever reason, and then at least I know where I stand,
Yeah.
know?
I think we wanted to kind of talk a little bit about how we can help you
Yeah. Do that.
go to Yeah. Because I, like we mentioned before, obviously we mentioned it before and we kind of said that I think it came off the back of I'd had a rejection and I was like,
Yeah.
happy to have had a rejection. 'cause it's, at least they've told you something and the reason was legit. Um, but yeah, I think it's, it's just something that we just don't like doing as a nation. Is it? We
We don't know.
no, essentially.
So, I mean, I actually had a prime example of this the other day. I did, I, I was, someone rang me and was like trying to sell something that, it was like a charity thing and they were like, blah, blah, blah. And I, and I,
no,
I felt so awkward to say no. I actually hung up and just blocked the number.
Do you know what? I've got good at these calls because I get so fricking, many of
Yeah.
actually ridiculous. The amount of calls I get
Oh yeah.
of people like trying to sell themselves to me is Yeah. Crazy.
It's not good, but, but yeah. So we don't like saying no. So ba basically we're gonna help you. So you can say no and not ghost anybody.
yes.
um, and I think, I think the easiest way to tackle it is if you've, what if you've, you've got in touch with a supplier, they've sent you the quote, perhaps it's not for you, you just don't wanna work with them. Whatever reason, just send an email. You can just send an email. Acknowledge, acknowledge what they've done so far, you know, thank you for,
Yeah.
you for your quote, whatever. And then just, you know, be honest and just explain how this not for you, it's not the right fit. And then that's it. That's it. And that's all you need to do. You don't need to go massively into detail, but you know, that's just a polite,
would always give a reason because
yeah.
thing for me is when a couple email me and say, I've decided to go with someone else.
We wanna know why.
that. I wanna know, but also I feel really awkward to be like, well, why? Do you know what I mean? And I, and I always read retype that email where it's like, Oh, you
Oh, can I ask why? Yeah.
wondered if you could help me, you know, to help me move my business forward and la la la, which is crap. I just wanna
Yeah. Yes.
you know
I was gonna say,
I wanna, you know, for my own
yeah. Yeah.
is the thing is when you're
Was it me?
Yeah. Like, but if it's me that's
Yeah.
like when
know.
yeah, you kind of wanna, you know, and if it's that, oh well they offered more in their package or we likes that they said X
Yeah,
it does help us for in future.
it does. You are right
you, if you are either ghosting people, you're not telling them the reason. All we are doing is sitting around and pondering.
on it. Yeah. I'll just sit there and be like, oh, why though? Why? Yeah.
I
It's like I put, you were giving me all of the reasons, like all the signs that you wanted to go with me, and then you just ghosted me and I did. I just, why?
signs, you know,
Yeah.
that you put in an inquiry and then like just, and obviously this is a big part of my job because we always put two to three quotes forward for each supplier. We have to then go back to the other suppliers and say, oh, they've decided not to go with you. So I
Yeah.
a lot. And I always just say, you know, they've decided not to go with you on this occasion. I'll always put the reason why, and I'll just say, you know, o obviously for me, we'll always think of you in future. Um, but you know, I think just thanking them for their
Yeah. That's it.
appreciate it. If there's something in particular that you liked, like for example, if I've done a consultation with someone, I've had somebody say to me before, we did decide to go with somebody else, but we absolutely loved that you gave us the idea of X, or we loved your advice on X.
Yeah.
them, give a
But yeah. Yeah. Feed it to him.
Yeah, really liked you. We're not going with you, but we liked that you said this. Unless the other, on the flip side, I'd say, unless there is a genuine reason, like maybe they were a little bit
Yeah.
they kept harassing you
Oh,
harassed. Like
you can say, I think you should. Yeah. Because if, if it is the case that they wouldn't like leave you alone after you've, you know, then I think you should. 'cause I always give couples like, I'll, I'll. I'll do the quote, send it off, and I'll say like, you know, take your time, have a look through.
And I generally will give someone, like a week before I then will be like, just to see if you've had chance to, 'cause by then I should think they've had a chance to sit down and have a look at it, just in case they got questions. Yeah.
And like if they've been at
Yeah.
leave it to the
But I, but I remember when I was getting married and I like inquired with somebody and I think they, but then they would like message me every day. Like, have, and I, and I just found that really weird 'cause like, I hadn't had a chance to sit down with Richard and look over stuff. So in the end I was like, oh, thanks. But it's just not for us, you know? But I actually, I probably should just been like, you were harassing me, you know, not harassing, but I should've just said
yeah.
You are.
I didn't like your, the way that
Yeah. You, you didn't give me a chance to think about it.
Yeah, I actually had a bit of a situation like this recently. I inquired with a supplier that I've not, um, I've seen them at an event, but I hadn't like physically worked with
Yeah.
Um, so I put in an inquiry 'cause it's something a bit different than my couples wanted, one of my couples wanted and that I sent an email. Then they called me, but I was like driving or something and I was like, oh no, it was really late. It was like really late on a Friday. It was like
Oh,
a Friday or something, or yeah, it was Saturday I think. Yeah.
weird.
like, I was already like, you know me, I work quite
Yeah,
I was already like down eating dinner or whatever and I was a bit like, oh, like bit taken aback by it. When
yeah, yeah, yeah,
answer my calls 'cause you never know who's gonna be. And I was bit like, oh, can you call me tomorrow? Well, they didn't call me for a couple of days. I didn't hear anything and then I just didn't really think anything. Well, I hadn't gone
yeah. Yeah.
to that, uh, yet to think about it. Anyway, then they tried to call me again and I think I was driving and then they text me a couple of times. Well. If you wanna ever get a hold of me on my phone, WhatsApp would never text me because I never ever look at my texts. Like, I dunno what it is, it's just, I'm all about WhatsApp, but also my WhatsApp's more like my couples and my
Yeah.
I don't really, sometimes certain suppliers I will converse with over WhatsApp, but really let, I've emailed
Yeah.
Email. Right?
Okay. Yeah.
I had to say, had to say to them, can you just email me the price? 'cause they, they've given me a price on text, but then kept ringing me and, and texted
That's odd.
I
Yeah,
with the
no.
saw it and then so I was like, can you just email me? And then they emailed me and then I replied and was like, yeah, I'll put this forward. Like, I just thought you could have done that the same day.
Yeah. And also,
that they were being proactive, but I
I dunno.
bit like, you're annoying me
Yeah. Yeah, it's irritating. I feel like the etiquette though, is that, say if you reach out to someone on email, you then continue that on email. If you reach out to someone on WhatsApp, then you continue on WhatsApp. I don't think you should like double dip,
No,
if you know what I mean.
I had recently where a supplier called me was really interested in working with me and I was like, actually, yeah, can you ping me an email? Um, 'cause this sounds quite good. I, I haven't got time to look at it now. And they were like really keen,
yeah.
the fact that they've picked up the phone and spoke to me because it was something that I was actively looking for and they never emailed me.
Oh,
them and was like, by the way, your email's not come through. They're like, oh yeah, I haven't sent it yet, I will send it. And you're
well, but you were so desperate to work with me, and now you're,
yeah. So things like that I would feed
Yeah.
Yeah.
I agree with that. Um, because it isn't, yeah, I think it's not offend, you're not offending them. I think, I think, I think if you are a business and as a business owner like, and you as obviously as well, it's, you have to have a bit of a backbone, don't you be a bit of, a bit of a fixed skin. Um, and you can only grow, I think, from somebody telling you where you've, maybe where your shortcomings are and things like that.
But I don't think a co a couple saying to me, thanks, but we don't wanna go with you is much better than someone completely ghosting me. 'cause that is rude.
It
Because I've sat and I've spent, I mean I've started, I used to just send like a quote out, now I do a, I, I've actually started doing like a presentation, like a full blown like mood board that takes me, it can take me up to a couple of hours to do. And I've sat there in my time and done that and I'm not getting paid for that.
No.
I don't mind doing it. It's part of my service. But if someone then just can't even acknowledge that you've sent it over.
over you. Do you
Just so rude.
for florist out of everybody, because
Me, me, me, me. It's me. That's me. And my little violin.
Out of all suppliers, like for me, my services are pretty, you are either going on the day management or you're go planning.
Yeah,
proposals for those. I maybe may do a bit a few edits after the consultation, but actually for you guys, yeah, every florist does tend to give a mood ball to give them the idea. 'cause obviously
because it's visual, isn't it?
Yeah,
Yeah,
you can do for them.
yeah.
I can imagine that takes a lot of
Yeah. It is time consuming. It is obviously, like they look nice and I feel like it presents you well, but yeah, it,
cake, they do the
yeah. Yeah.
makers charge
For your sample. Yeah. I remember. I think I paid for,
30 quid
yeah.
a box out.
That's it.
they are
So getting covered.
and they do them all at the same time. So they'll do like once a month and
Yeah,
do a load and then send them all out. But yeah, for you guys, I
it's annoying. Yeah.
board to my couples once they're booked,
So after they've,
hours. So I can imagine that that's
mean, like, good example of of this happening was there was a couple I met with a couple of months ago and I, so I went out to their house, so I traveled into like 15 minutes away. So I've traveled there, I've been there, I was there for an hour. I'm chatting with them. I've put together some notes, then I've gone home,
Mm-hmm.
and then I've put together a mood board and a quote, and I've obviously like, sorted out a little, like a contract for them and everything. And I've compo compiled it all, and I've sent it over with like an email, like, and everything like that. And then literally, um, they, they just ghosted me.
What
Yeah.
did you chase him up a
Yeah, I chased them up once and she said, oh, I've been really busy. Um, and I'll get back to you, but we definitely wanna go ahead. So this is,
Oh,
so then they throw me a little bit of bait and I'm like, oh, okay, great.
busy
yeah, So then, then it, a couple more weeks went by and I was like, Hmm, they really need to like, if they want book me now and they need to like, 'cause also if someone says, oh I definitely wanna go with you business wise, I should be like, until that deposit's paid, that's not booked.
But in, in your mind, yeah, you take another booking, but in your mind you're like, oh, but that person's like, if someone hadn't come to me, I'd be a bit like, oh, but someone sort of like said that they haven't paid it, but, you know. Um, and then two weeks went by and they're still not heard anything. I chased 'em off and I've never heard from 'em since, and that was two months ago. So they're definitely not using me.
you not think maybe they will? I've chased them up
Nah, I don't think so.
Do you know the best thing to do? Sorry, listeners. This is number one. This is what all I'm sorry about. Everybody does it in the world, but they email and they'll say, I've had another inquiry for this date. Just wanna check if you wanna go ahead
Yeah.
me know. Um, and then if you don't hear back from them within like a couple of days, send another email. I haven't heard back from you, so I'm assuming you don't wanna go ahead. I've now released the
Yeah, yeah,
not
yeah. I'll give him the kick out the bum I need.
every supplier
does that
I'm just letting you know. Every
trade secrets?
at the same time, don't ever think to yourself, oh, 'cause I have this for one of my couples. The caterers, like we've had another inquiry for their day with their tastings, not for a few weeks. They pay a refundable deposit. You know, if they come to the tasting and they don't like it, we'll give it back to them. And I'm like, are they been legit or are they not? It's
Yeah.
to work out because actually if it is true and I've gone, nah, you're full of, they're full of shit. Don't pay 'em a deposit. But then they actually take a booking like they've pre-war me.
Yeah.
know, so
Oh,
Oh, it's, it's a difficult one that, 'cause it could be a sales
oh, oh, no. Or it could actually be real.
Then you go back to them like, we did
Oh
you we've
yeah, exactly.
See ya.
Oh. But
no,
yeah,
that's not on. And I think especially if it, I think sometimes, like for me, like I say, I do this as part of my role. Sometimes I do genuinely just forget to say like, oh, they've gone with somebody else if it's really busy. But if they've chased me up, then I think it's bad to
yeah. To then ignore that. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, And what would you say are the reasons that people don't, what would you say are the top reasons that suppliers don't get booked?
I would say the most common one is gotta be someone saying, I found it cheaper elsewhere.
It's
It's gotta be. Um, but I.
just shouts to us that you're the wrong person for
you're not the right, you're not the right
not worried
client.
you are worried about
Cost. Yeah. I get a lot of either, um, not a lot actually, to be fair, I don't, it's not often. I don't get a wedding if I have gone to the effort of meeting with somebody and everything. Normally you build a relationship,
Yeah. Yeah. And also that's a lot. As a couple who's got the time to then go and do that with another florist that they, they've sat with you for an
yeah.
arrange this meeting. Like at least it's done
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But um, but yeah, so I, I'll either get, um, we found it cheaper elsewhere
Yeah.
um, we've decided we're gonna do it ourselves now. That is probably one of the ones I'm like, good luck to ya.
the kind of when you've gotta go back and be like, that's fine, but I would highly advise you not
Yeah.
just
People don't realize, yeah. Oh, we're just gonna stick a few flowers in a vs. It was so easy. Oh, that's why I went to, uh, I, you know, I've become qualified and did like six years of training.
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
just stick thousand a miles
luck for that.
or like they've gone to a decor company who offers flowers or they, they claim to be, do flowers or flourish. Or they, or they rent out like artificial, but it's not good quality. Artificial. It's,
one for you. 'cause you almost wanna say, look, I'm gonna be really honest. It's not gonna be as good because
yeah.
poor couple probably don't realize that.
they don't.
don't realize that the deco company, that's also the dj, the coordinate other, the, the, the florist, the everything, balancing the teapots on their
Uh, exactly.
They're not, yeah. They're, it's not the one,
No, it's not the one, it's just annoying, but it's, yeah, I would say they're probably the most popular. And then sometimes you get so because, um, I suppose same for you, like I travel all, I will travel the whole uk, I'll go anywhere. There's nowhere I, if someone says to me, can do wedding in Scotland, obviously pay for my travel. But I would do that.
Oh, I
I've gone as far as the late district, but
Yeah.
I would do that, you know, obviously there's a cost to it, but if somebody wants you and they want to use you, then that's fine. But I feel like sometimes, like say that's happened, someone's approached me about doing a wedding that's that far. Obviously they're gonna in, in incur like travel costs and things like that.
Yeah,
So then they might do that, but then get a quote from someone that is actually local to that area and then they'll be like, oh, do you know what, we've gone with someone local, which is completely fair. Makes sense.
eco
Yeah, exactly.
people work and
Yeah, so, so that's another one as well, because.
good one. I think that's one that you'd be like, Yeah. fair.
Yeah. I'd be like, yeah, fair enough. That makes, that makes sense. Yeah, totally. So, yeah. Uh, what about you? Is there any that you've, that, uh, I've not mentioned that you
are, I mean, if it's cost, I'm always like, yeah, fine,
Yeah.
I'm like, that's fine. 'cause
Good luck to ya.
yeah. Um, as well as I know like how much work you can take on as a planner and how much you need to earn to live. So
Yeah,
cheaper, like, you know,
yeah, exactly.
have the um. Probably if on the day management, the, I never have a plan. If you are looking for a planner, it's 'cause you genuinely have not got the time to do it. You want a
Yeah.
know? But with on the day management, I have had, yeah, we've decided to do it ourselves, which I always go back to and I'm like, there's no way you're gonna be doing it
No.
I'll be, I'm brutally honest, I'm like, look, you've got a markee on your land. And they're like, oh yeah, it's sorry. 'cause mum said, well, she'll be there, bridesmaids are gonna pitch in. And I'm like, what you gonna do when the toilets go wrong? Which has happened to 90% of my marquee weddings in the last three years. Like, I will go back and be really honest, but
Yeah.
hire me. I'm
I'm just, yeah. Letting you know.
your wedding day by
totally.
somebody. I don't care who it is, but get your family and friends aren't staff. We are staff, know?
that's it. That's totally right. Totally agree.
honest with people about that. But yeah, the, my next ones is probably personality, who they clicked with,
Yeah,
completely fine because, um, somebody that you, you know, we are working together for, you know, 6, 12, 18 months. There's a long time. If they've found somebody else they clicked with, then absolutely fine. Um, and then the other one is probably experience, but more in like, because I'm so experienced, I don't get this very often, don't Jacob. Um, but yeah, no, not,
and me too.
Um, but it could be like, oh, we are having an Indian wedding and we've just found somebody that's done a lot more of the style of Indian
Yeah.
we want. Or they've done a lot more, you, you know, of a particular, you know, Nigerian weddings or, you know, it could be a particular type of wedding
Yeah,
you know, Or that,
I get that.
married at X venue, so we've gone with a planner that's done that venue multiple times. That would mean to me that I, it doesn't, you know, it's not.
Yeah.
If you, if you've got two planners sitting in front of you and one you get on with better, but the other one's done more weddings at that venue, I'd still go with the one that you get on with
Well, especially because you're spending,
us.
it. And you're spending all that time with them. Like you build up a relationship and I think like for you, that's so important. Like it's important for me, but it isn't. It isn't, because for me it's more of like a visual aesthetics thing. So what I provide is a service that they're looking at my work and they want my work rather than, although I do meet with people and I do build up relationships just the way I work. But not every florist is like that.
Some of them, they have a whole team, they, you don't ever meet. You might meet with one person. There's a whole team of people there that you and that are actually doing your flowers. So.
Yeah.
Um, but yeah.
like the key things really.
yeah.
So I would just, yeah, I think our top thing on that is just to respond how you feel comfortable, whether that's like more of a message than it is a phone call. Um, you know, and just be really honest and to the point because the thing is, you're, you are only gonna get a response back if you don't go into detail as to why you're not going ahead with that people. And we'd really urge you to do
yeah. Totally.
want that supply ringing you to find out why,
Yeah.
why you're not going
Just send an email.
first instance.
yeah,
it quite closed at the end,
yeah,
are sure the best with the
yeah.
We'll, of course, you know, if you, if you genuinely really liked them, we'll of course, you know, recommend you to friends and stuff in future.
yeah.
Wish you all the best and then you'll probably just get, uh, yeah. Thank you so much for letting me know. with your day
That's it. That's it. It's easy as that.
no one's the, we always worry. I suppose the bottom line is, and I actually thought this to myself the other day when I emailed a supplier. I was like, oh, I hope they didn't get funny. And then I thought, well, they're not gonna get funny because that's just stupid. Because
And what are they gonna force you to use them?
gonna use them again. If they get shitty with me, I am.
yeah, exactly.
yeah,
Exactly.
that's not, I think that's our automatic human reaction is to think, oh no, they're gonna be annoyed
Worry.
but,
Yeah. That's like me. Yeah,
get annoyed with you, then
that's just silly.
that you wanna work with
It's not good business. Is it
Q and not picking their, lawn mower. And then
going somewhere else? Yeah.
mowers
Yeah. I think so.
q getting annoyed with
Yeah. Yeah.
just not gonna happen.
No
But yeah, hopefully
hope that helps. Yeah, I think it will, but hopefully it will. It will protect some suppliers, but also build confidence in couples that you can politely say no.
You can say no, the power to
Yes. Woo.
I had that
Me too.
to say no to things.
I say no to food.
Say no to being so busy. Yeah, of course I'll
Oh no,
for a coffee. No,
I know. I've got like way like that. Like worse. I've got worse than I was before now saying yes to everything. Work, work, social. I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. And then I, the,
at your calendar.
week comes and I'm like, how am I gonna physically do this? How am I gonna get through this mentally?
yeah.
Should we go on onto the listeners' questions?
Let's do it.
Okay. So first up, um, walking down the aisle song, did your husband to be know what it would be? Did they help pick it or was it a total surprise?
this
Yeah, I like that.
And do you know what? It was something that I actually thought in my head when I was, I was like, I don't actually know do people, 'cause it's not the kind of thing that I ask my cup like, how old do you both know what the song it is?
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Yeah.
oh, should they know? Should they not know?
No, I don't. I do. You know what? I don't think I did tell Richard.
Did you not?
don't think so.
I told Martin
dunno.
it to him, but he would not know what it is. I
Uh, okay. It's a song for you, isn't it? I think more than,
I was think gonna say, do you the walking down aisle song, is it for the bride? Is it for you? Should it be a song that you, you know, like your first dance
yeah.
a song that you
Put together. Yeah.
but.
I, I
of told Martin the meaning behind that. I had, I had the piano version of You Look Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton, which was just
NeeNee.
or even just doing that just would
NeeNee.
that
Oh,
just, I just love it.
oh, sweet.
made me emotional, even when I was a kid.
Yeah.
just
It just got that song. Yeah.
just those 3, 3, 4 notes
That's not, yeah.
And I said to him, I just, I love this song and it's obviously you look wonderful
Yes. Nice.
and the words. And he was like, oh yeah, no, that's really nice. So I played it to him and explained it. But yeah, do, do, I, I, I think, I feel like most of my couples from meetings I've had, when we are talking about the songs, they will openly say it,
Yeah, I don't know if I kept it a secret. I don't think I did. 'cause thinking back I was, 'cause we had a string trio, so I had to, I was like liaising with them on email about what song they were gonna do the like, so, and, and Richard would've seen, I would, I, I don't think it was a secret. I think the only people I didn't tell was like other, anyone else other than Richard.
yeah,
like my dad walked me down the aisle and he didn't know what so else sort of thing and like, yeah. But
I don't think it matters. I tell you what I did once, and I remember this, and this was years ago, and it, so this shows, this was cool for me to remember it. She told him, she was having, I dunno, whatever the hell talked down the old Cannon deal,
yeah.
and then he was like, oh, I really want, you'll never walk alone because
Oh
fan and it's, you'll never walk
no.
I, I actually think that song is the perfect words for walking down the aisle, if I'm honest.
Well, yeah, yeah. I'm just not a Liverpool fan. That's,
Oh, there you go. But anyway, so he, she had gone absolutely not am I having that song to play walking down the aisle. So this was an Indian wedding. So the groom walks down the aisle with his
yeah.
and then it goes into the bride. And, um, she was like, we're not having that song. We're not having that song. So they sorted the song and uh, she was like, oh, give him this note before he walks down the aisle. God, it makes me feel emotional just thinking
Oh, ah.
And uh, we just, before I gave him this note and he opened it and he just like teared up. And
Ah.
play and she'd written in the notes something, I can't remember what it said. Now it's something on the long zones of, um, this is what you ask for, so this is what you'll get. And then we started playing it. It
Oh, that's actually really nice. That's lovely. That's a really good way of making it like a surprise, I guess, if you wanted to make it a surprise and that's,
Yeah.
way of doing it. 'cause otherwise, I dunno how you'd surprise someone with a song,
No,
if you see what I mean.
thinking about you walking down the aisle song and it, and you know, you do think of a song, maybe it's like a, like a, obviously you don't wanna joke, this is the thing, it's not a jokey song, is it?
No.
down, it's called normally quite a slow and emotional song. But if there is a certain song that you both love and you wanna make it a surprise, you could, you could just say
Yeah.
or either say, or him or her, um, either just say, oh, I'm not gonna tell you it's a surprise. Or pretend it's something else. Quite standard Canon Andy. And then when you start about to walk down, press play and see if they notice. But what I will say is it's such an emotional moment that I don't know
If they're like
recognize, when I walked, I think I did, I was quite far away when we started playing the music, but I can't. And I, and I think it, it definitely got me straight. I remember starting to
I was crying. I was,
Ah, but when I was walking down the aisle, I can't remember thinking about the music. I was just thinking about, look, seeing
yeah,
me more emotional than seeing, seeing Martin. And so, yeah, I don't know if you would necessarily get the reaction of that song from, I dunno,
I know what you're saying.
maybe if you, if you're gonna do that, get the coordinator or whoever to press play and leave it running for 30 seconds
Yeah. Give it like a, they can accept the sort. Yeah.
song.
it up.
But I would say there's no standard etiquette with that.
No, you do what you want, I think, but Yeah.
like I say, I've seen the surprise once, which was really cool. And it's always stuck, stuck
Yeah.
But, you know, I've, I don't think I've, it doesn't scream out to me where anyone's been like, oh no, you can't tell the groom the,
no, I definitely must have told vision. I dunno why. Yeah. Thinking about it. Yeah. So,
Yeah. Okay, cool. Next up we've got, we are currently stuck between decide in between registrar and celebrant. I think I wanna celebrant, but I dunno how I feel about getting married before the day.
uh,
official moment, the official moment on the day. But of course then you're paying double the fees. So I either need to convince into the registrar, which I know you love doing before the wedding, or just suck it up with no celebrant. Hate help. I was say hate or help.
hate,
So I mean, you've probably, if you've listened to our episodes before, you'll know that we are very much celebrant. Well, you had a
well, I had a registrar. Yeah. So we are like, yeah. But I, my ceremony was, yeah, no, I, I've seen celebrant weddings and I think they're lovely. I've seen, um.
They're
Many of them, they are more personal.
and there's none of that
Yeah.
gotta be like, oh, the groom needs to be there 30 minutes before to make, you know. And the groom's standing and he's chatting to all his friends and family and you've gotta drag him away for 20 minutes for them to Go through all
Go for everything. Yeah,
that stuff. And they don't, the amount of registrars they've seen get people's names wrong because you know it's one in, one out. And also you don't know who you're gonna get on the day. You do not meet those
that's true.
what they're gonna be like. You might not get on with them. I mean, I was quite lucky actually for our civil, or they were really nice.
Yeah.
but you don't know
No, you're right.
what you're gonna get. You know, when you go for you notice of marriage, you, some of them can
Oh God.
ours was really
Miserable.
Yeah, no. Like, oh, you're excited.
Yeah. Nothing. It's what they do every day in day out, don't they?
in a day.
Yeah.
like, you have to be on time. There is no, it's very pressured. You have to get there. You need to be there 10 minutes before is the bride to again, re-go over stuff. I've had situations like that. The bride's dad's passed away, but they still brought up, oh, what's your dad's occupation? And you're just like,
Uh, yeah, yeah.
you know, she's just an emoti an a heightened moment. Anyway, I just, just, think for those things, and I get what you're saying. Sorry, I'm like really taking the reins
No, no, you, that's fine. Yeah. Yeah. That's, you go for it. Yeah.
what you're saying, but the way that I always say it, and I've probably said it on here before, is when you, but when you give birth to a baby, you celebrate the day it was born. You don't celebrate the day that you go and register it at the council, and that's all you're doing is you just, do you fill in a form
yeah.
it?
Yeah. I agree with that. Yeah. I think that's a good point you make.
I timed us when we was in Wales and we got married in 10 minutes. That's how long it took to sign the bit of paper. They did some words. Yeah, I do. I do. It was a nice moment, don't get me wrong. It was a nice moment. Probably more because she was doing it in Welsh, which I thought was so
That is cool.
Um, but yeah, I just, I wouldn't ever think of that day. And you don't need to make it a big thing. It's like when you go and give your notice a marriage, it's not a big thing. Think of it as the same. You
It's the same.
your jeans if you
You just go and do it and then
it.
Yeah.
like. We
Go out for dinner or, yeah.
We, we, we've done it as like a, we, we, we had that, we call that our elopement.
Yeah.
We don't say, as we say, we say our elopement and then our. Wedding day, but obviously with, yeah, that costs money. 'cause we did do two things essentially. So if you don't wanna do the two things,
But I feel like if you wanna do,
it's a
if you wanna do them both, then you just allow for that in your co, in your budget when you first, when you're first budgeting, surely.
know that the, this registry office part, if you book a two by two, it's called, so we had us two and then we had our two photographers as are witnesses. But you can, you can ask the register. That's the only thing is witnesses. You want two randoms, you need
Yeah.
two real random people. You need to ask the registry office if they can provide two witnesses. They'll normally say yes. Because when you start getting people like parents, oh well we can have our moms come.
It becomes more of a thing.
Yes. So if you either just need to get like two Yeah, you need to ask register officer so they can supply two random people. Um, and then, um, you or I don't, I don't know, like ask your next door neighbor, advertise online. I don't, I don't, know.
Advertise online
yeah, Facebook.
some gumtree like.
an hour today? Like do, yeah, but I mean, most, the, most of the time when I've had people do this, they've either used me a, like a photographer or they've used the, the, the registrars. It could be that you, for your main wedding day, your actual celebrant, can they come and just be your witness or two, your staff member? I dunno.
Yeah,
as anyway. Um, but to do that cost 48 pounds. it.
that's not a lot really, that's, that's as much as a takeaway Chinese, isn't it? Do you know what I mean? It's really, think about that. It's,
normally 11:00 AM on a Tuesday. That's your only option. It's a two by two. You two. Two witnesses. That's it.
Lovely. Done.
but I get what you're saying and I get it's not for everyone. And I also think from, uh, Haley's experience,
Yeah.
know, you are, you are like, yeah, you, if you, if you are not, is the thing. I think it depends on you as people. If you, if, I always think the ceremony's really important and I wanted the ceremony to be a big
Yeah.
of our day. That's why you're doing the day. So I wanted it to be personal.
I did as well. We did our own vows and that was like a big thing for me. 'cause I wanted to try and make it more personal. But actually, if I could do it again, I probably would've a celebrant because I just wanted that moment to be, but it, but we were,
with
yeah. Yeah.
they spend, like, you know, they do Zoom meetings with you and go through all, you know, they
Nice.
how you, they even like do meetings with your, like your family members, like how are you brought up? And like, find stories out about you, like, you know, and
Yeah,
a script
like, yeah, exactly. Exactly.
to keep that forever and,
Wow.
I, I honestly just can't give many pro for me. But then also, I suppose for me, I've sat in hundreds of civil ceremonies. Like
Yeah. So you've seen,
to press, play and stop on the music. So I used to sit at the back of every single ceremony and they're all the same. And I'm just like,
yeah, that's,
of
yeah. Yeah, I can see why it put you off. Yeah. It's like, yeah. We were lucky with the woman that we had our registrar. She was very nice, and actually she made it kind of personalized. She spoke a bit about the venue and
Yeah,
was just really lovely. But we were lucky because they're not like that. They're not normally like that.
It's like the readings, you know, when they give you the book to pick the
Yeah.
that. Today is the day in
Oh, I didn't even know that they gave you a choice.
and
Oh no. Come on.
to, I
Oh,
the words
oh,
it every week.
oh. I can see why you've been put off. To be fair. Well, I think it's safe to say we think you should go with a celebrant wedding and just do your legal bit,
get what you're saying, and I
yeah.
if you don't want it to be separate, if you're not that asked about it being passed, which some people aren't. Some people
If you're not bothered about it.
out.
Yeah.
to the other party, is
Yeah. Then depends what was for you, what you, what's important about your day and where you wanna put that money at the end of the day as well. Like, if you wanna invest more in your ceremony and that part, then I think the way to make it more personalized is to go, uh, down the celebrant route,
yeah. know, it's, it's, yeah. It, it's, it's a, it's a difficult one, but you just have to sit down, have a
have a chat with your other half and see what you, what they think as well.
But yeah, I would say, and then you get to pick, to be fair though, we have put our anniversary date as the day that we signed ours, but that was because that was such a special day for us. 'cause obviously we did the mountain climb stuff,
Yeah,
bit different. But you can set, you can set your anniversary date to
whenever you want.
it to
That's it. Cool.
think That's us for today,
That's it.
that helps.
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